Identities of a lost soul
by ether-fanfic
Summary: KotOR:Ch42. “You are under arrest! Lay down your weapon, Sith, or we shall open fire!” With mounting horror, I inwardly cursed the black robe that cloaked my bloodstained armour, and announced me as an enemy to the Republic.
1. Broken Recollections

_**Disclaimer – Based on the computer game - Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. The world and characters belong to Bioware/Lucasarts; I'm just... borrowing them. I'll give them back, honest!  
**_

**_Author's Note: This will have spoilers if you haven't played the game – and probably won't make any sense unless you have. Beware however that the plot does end up diverging from the game in some ways quite drastically as the story progresses._**

_**Hope you enjoy.**_

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**Chapter One – Broken Recollections**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

_Pain._

A dull throbbing emanated like a gong bashing inside my head, shattering my peaceful oblivion. Faint voices, whispering in tense and urgent tones, filtered in from distant shadows of my semi-conscious mind.

…

_"It's complete. She will not recall a thing," someone said in a low, serious tone.  
"And what if she does?" This voice conjured up images of an uptight society princess, worrying whether the dog would track mud inside.  
"You will be there to ensure she does not. Have faith, Padawan. And if the worst should come to pass, you know what you have to do."_

…_  
_

I prised open eyelids, to see nothing but darkness. The voices fled, as if fearing the onslaught of consciousness. _Must have been another bad dream. _A lance of red hot pain seized the side of my head with cruel fingers. _Where am I? _A vague memory of being a quiet little scholar onboard a vast intergalactic ship flittered through the agony. _That's not right. Sod the first question - **who** am I?_

I closed my eyes again, and the visage of a man I couldn't place flashed from nowhere. His face... but horribly disfigured, blood and bone standing out in sharp contrast to pale, sickly skin. A sense of nightmarish terror gripped me. _No. No! I didn't do that! I'm sorry!_

A faint booming in the distance roused my awareness to the eerie wailing of sirens. _Don't be daft. I'm Jen Sahara, a scholar hired by the Jedi Council to look at some old ruins. I've never seen anything as horrible as that!_

A shudder rippled through my entire torso, and the pain escalated before dying away. It took me a moment to realize that the entire ship had shuddered with me. _Joy of joys, we must be under attack. Oh well, I've been in tighter spots. _I'd opened my eyes again, and my vision slowly came into focus, amongst gray and red spots. A stark chrome wall loomed in front of me; I was lying stiffly on the ground. _No I haven't, _the timid side of me said. I remembered growing up in a small, peaceful community, having a happy little sickening life. Eating vegetables and saving bunny rabbits. The last two years in particular felt like I'd been moving around in a drugged stupor. _Either I sucked up far too much spice last night, or someone's messed with my mind. Sithspit, this is bad._

The room quaked again, and I heard shouts outside. _Later, later, find out who I am later. _I gritted my teeth, and forced myself to sit up. My vision blacked out again, but I was fairly sure I was still conscious. My hand rose to the source of all this pain - the side of my head. _Mmm, sticky. _My sight reappeared again, and I could see dark blood trickling down my forearm. _Blood on my hands. How... appropriate._

A door swished open, and I heard someone rush in, panting.

"We've been ambushed by a Sith battle fleet! The Endar Spire is under attack! Hurry up - we don't have much time!" Hrm, a strong sounding voice, if a little alarmed. I tilted my head slowly to face him. A youngish fellow, blonde and blue-eyed, with muscle to back it up. He looked very wholesome, if a bit simple.

"Jen!" he cried, his expression changing from controlled panic, to not-so-controlled panic. "You're hurt!"

I rolled my eyes at the obvious. "Nothing a shot of kolto and a long hot bath won't cure." _I hope. _"Give a girl a hand up, will ya?"

He gingerly helped me to my feet as I struggled to place him. _Ahhh, Trask, my protective roommate. Very helpful at running my life, and saving me from making sheep's eyes at the Commander. What sort of simpering coward am I? _

Trask's hand waving in front of me shot me back to the present. _Focus. Plenty of time for working this out later._

"I know you're hurt Jen, but we need to hurry! You'd better put some clothes on, get some from your footlocker."

Belatedly I realized I was standing in my rather saucy underwear. I grinned at that, and noticed a mottled red colouring Trask's face.

"How do you know where my clothes are?" I murmured as I sauntered over to the locker, taking care to move very slowly. "Been going through my underwear?"

"Wha-? No! That's where you've always kept it! I mean… I'm just worried about that knock to your head, it looks pretty serious."

Hrm, pretty drab clothes here. I had a feeling that outrageous flair and colour was more my style, but you couldn't tell that from looking in here. Or maybe I did prefer drab? _Who is the real me? _I quickly threw on some clothes, grabbed a nearby blaster, and turned to face Trask.

"Now hurry up – we have to find Bastila! We have to make sure she gets off this ship alive!"

"Who's Bastila?" I asked as I clipped on my shoes. They tightened to fit my feet with a barely audible hiss.

"That knock did more damage to your head than I thought! Bastila's the commanding officer on the Endar Spire. Well, not an officer, really. But she's the one in charge of this mission." Trask was waiting impatiently at the door. I could swear he was almost tapping his foot like a petulant child. "You may be a scholar, but you swore the same oath to the Republic as everyone else! One of our primary duties is to guarantee Bastila's survival in the event of enemy attack, so let's get going!"

_Blah, blah, blah._ This guy was getting pretty droney. And there was no way I was going to stick my head out for some little girl playing at being commander. Funny, I'd thought the commander was a guy. My mind was feeling seriously messed up. And I didn't recall making any ludicrous oath to the Republic, either.

"Oath or no oath," I said, leveling a serious look at Trask. "I'm heading to the escape pods."

Trask looked taken aback. _Ahhh, he's used to sweet scared little Jen. A shy little vegetarian who wouldn't hurt a fly. I am so going to enjoy peeling back the flesh of whoever dared- _I blinked, stopping myself in mid-rant. _Wha-? What an awful, horrid... how can I even think that?_

"Don't be stupid, Jen! You won't stand a chance against the Sith by yourself! We've got to stick together if we want to make it out of this alive!" His voice was desperate and pleading. An intense look deepened the blue of his otherwise vacuous eyes. _He's got no reason to feel that strongly about my life. _I eyed him over suspiciously, wondering over his motives. _I bet he's been ordered to get me out of here alive. Food for thought. And I suppose I should do the smart thing and play Jen for awhile._ _Especially with Sith crawling around... Sith and the Republic. Why do I feel like I hate both sides?_

"Alright, let's go soldier," I said briskly.

Concern momentarily creased Trask's strong face. "I know you're not used to fighting, Jen, but I promise you we'll get out of here alive. Just follow me, and aim that blaster at any Sith we meet."

I nodded meekly, rolling my eyes as he turned his back. As I didn't seem to have any other viable options, I followed him quietly out the door. Straight into a firefight.

For all the uncharitable thoughts I was having about Trask, he could certainly handle himself alright. Good thing too, because I was starting to feel rather shaky. _Need to heal myself. _My tenuous control over my rampant thoughts was fading, and that more than the shooting pain was beginning to rattle me. _Force heal is a light side power, I've been unable to do that since my eyes darkened. _My eyes? I was struggling to remain in the present. The hiss of blaster fire sounded fuzzy, distant... I could almost believe I was holo-gaming in one of those gods-awful plug-in realities. Fortunately Trask was making quick work of the enemy up ahead. _Force heal? I can't use the Force! What a... ridiculous concept!_

I growled deep from the back of my throat, in sheer annoyance at my inability to control my own mind. I spotted a black-armoured soldier step into view, and loosed my adrenaline, sprinting up to him and jabbing my blaster hard into his stomach as I fired. _Use your anger_, a dark voice taunted. The Sith screamed as he fell down, clutching his stomach. _When all else fails, just shoot them at point blank range_, another cheekier voice added to the fray.

"Jen! Are you crazy!" Trask, again. My walking lecture. "I can't believe you just ran up to that soldier – you could have been killed! Please, stay behind me, I can protect you!" His earnest blue eyes shone down into my face. I felt like vomiting.

"I don't quite feel myself, Trask," I said in a tiny voice. "I'm just so glad you're here to save me." Was that laying it on a bit thick? A human shield was pretty handy though, and this guy sure seemed to fall for the damsel in distress act. His chest puffed out and he put his arm around me.

"It's gonna be alright, Jen, I'll get you through this!"

A crackly voice over the ship's intercom invaded the room.

"This is Carth Onasi – The Sith are threatening to overrun our position! All hands to the bridge!"

Trask tugged on my arm like an annoying brat. "If he says things are bad, you'd better believe it! We have to get to the bridge to help defend Bastila!"

Right. Well, I'd get to the bridge anyway. We'd see whether I'd bother defending anyone. And in the meantime, I'd just stop bloody thinking, even if I had to knock myself out to do it.

As Trask cautiously opened another door, I gradually became aware of another feeling nestled in the back of my head. _Feeling? Or... presence?_ I was unsure, but it seemed almost sentient and separate from my own consciousness. Now that I had noticed it, I could sense small flashes of panic darting from it. I followed Trask a little numbly, trying to work out just what in the Outer Rim was going on with me.

_And here I thought it was bad enough not knowing who **I **am. Is this something... or someone... else in my head? _I could sense this other... person... struggle to control their panic, and succeed. A faint sense of calmness and serenity now. _Hrm, this feels like some sort of bond? But if I'm aware of them, then surely they know of me. _Bonds were created by the Force, my intuition told me. How the frell did I know that?

_I really need to play out the sweetness and light Jen act until I understand exactly what is going on. _I took a deep breath. _Control. No, that's not Jen. Panic, trust in the big tough guy. Save bunny rabbits. _I looked up at Trask with innocent hero-worship. _I'd better keep this up. I've a funny feeling my life may depend on it._

Trask had walked through the empty room, and opened another door. I saw a vision of a Jedi battling against a Dark Jedi, lightsabers whirling and crashing. _Focus! I've no time to wallow in dreams right now!_

"It's a Dark Jedi!" Trask hissed, pushing me backwards. Dizziness surged through me. "This fight is too much for us – we'd better stay back. All we'd do is get in the way."

With a startled jolt I realized this **was** reality. I could... _feel_ some sort of power crackling between the two fighters. The female – obviously the goody Jedi – was more nimble, and pushed her enemy backwards. The dark-clad male responded by deftly manipulating the power buzzing around the two of them, wrapping it about her neck and _squeezing._ I gaped, half of me blubbering in terror even as I cynically watched his fumbling technique. The woman responded by pushing him again, flinging away the coiled energy from her neck with practiced ease. Then wham! Back at it with the lightsabers. My eyes took in the fight critically, seeing them both feint, dodge and move at an amazing speed. _Hrm, not bad. I could take them both out, however. _I blinked, once more startled at my own thoughts. _Wha-?_

I wondered fleetingly if people could turn insane overnight. I was really starting to freak out now.

The female struck a killing blow, and the Sith staggered to his knees, coughing up blood in his dying throes. I was terrified, revolted, and yet somehow gleefully enjoying the show. The ship rocked again and a power conduit exploded directly behind the woman, arcs of lightening electrocuting her instantly.

She crumpled to the ground, an anguished moan expelling the last of the air from her lungs. _Now that's irony for you._

Trask cursed audibly. "That was one of the Jedi accompanying Bastila! Stang, we could have used her help!"

I scurried forward and quickly rifled through the still-warm corpses, eager the grab one of the lightsabers.

"Jen, we don't have time!" Trask grabbed my arm and dragged me towards the exit. Blood pounded through my head, strong enough to stop me struggling. "We need to get out of here – if there's one Dark Jedi there's going to be others!"

I had to visibly restrain myself from blasting him in the face. No one grabs me like that. No one. _Sweetness and light, remember. Control the rage... for now._

At once, I became aware that the weird presence I sensed earlier was somehow focused on me, briefly touching the broken feelings flickering through my mind. It felt like some sort of bright halogen lamp was shining directly at me.

Ice froze in my spine. _Definitely a guard then. A Jedi guard? This is going to be quite a challenge._ I quashed my anger with a controlled ease I didn't dare dwell on, and let Jen's feelings come to the fore. Panicked... but safe in the presence of big strong Trask. _Ugh._ It seemed to appease the Jedi however, the presence moved away from me imperceptibly. I tasted a small wave of relief as it slowly faded from my awareness altogether. _Must have got to the escape pods, whoever they are._

"Lead on Trask," I said in a sweet voice. "I'm right behind you." _With a blaster pointed at your ass. Heh._

The ship quaked dramatically, and as I stumbled along it occurred to me that panicking was perhaps the right emotion to feel regardless. The ship didn't seem like it would hold together much longer. Trask ran, increasing his pace, and I tried to keep up.

"We're on the bridge, but it seems deserted now." Trask said as we wandered past consoles and corpses. He really had a penchant for stating the obvious. Bodies and blood littered the floor. I could feel a prick of morbid excitement bubbling up, and also an unfamiliar emotion. _Sadness? At dead people? Since when?_ I tried unsuccessfully to empty my mind. _Death is always a sad affair! _I scowled, and glanced at my fist. It was clenching of its own accord. _Death is for the weak. _

"How far are the escape pods?" I asked quickly, deciding action was the best way to distract myself.

"Through two doors! Follow me!" Trask legged it, and I followed quickly, pausing only to loot a spare medpac along the way. Never hurts to be prepared.

We reached another closed door, and both paused as we heard something behind it – an ominous _snap-hiss­_ some part of me recognized all too well, accompanied with a malicious laugh.

"There's something behind here," Trask warned in a low tone.

"Well, duh," I muttered. Trask shot me a surprised look. _Act like Jen, remember. She's probably me at any rate. _My mind recoiled in disgust. _Weak fool._

The door opened, and a man faced us arrogantly, fitted in a sturdy exoskeleton that well exceeded Republic issue armour. He held a double-bladed lightsaber which radiated blood-red, reflecting sparks of colour across chrome walls. I felt the same power surging from him, but more intense than the Jedi fight we saw. It almost made me stagger back in its entirety. Some hazy part of me muttered that I was in no state to face anyone half as powerful as this guy. _Escape is the only option. Coward._

"Damn – another Dark Jedi! I'll try to hold him off; you get to the escape pods! Go!" Trask shoved me backwards, and ran through the opening, slamming his hand on the door controls as he crossed the threshold. The last I saw was the Dark Jedi sauntering towards him.

_Was he flaming crazy? He just committed suicide! _To say I was startled was an understatement. We may have been bunkmates for awhile, but to give his life for me was kind of... amusing_. Stupid idiot._ Unless... _I was right. He'd been ordered to get me out of here alive, at any cost._

"Well, let's not waste that." I muttered, and broke into as fast a sprint as my head injury would allow. Another door on my left, hopefully leading to the escape pods. _What I'd give for a stealth belt. _I heard the clanking of a Sith group marching in that awful armour through the wall. _Sounds like about four of them. No way I can take them all on. _There was a computer terminal next to me. I wondered briefly whether I could try my hand at slicing into it, then decided against it. _Not enough time. I need speed, and I never could hack to save my life. Sodding computers._

I took a breath and tried sensing any energy around me. The power I felt that crackled around those Jedi, the overwhelming surge of life and death that encompassed the Sith. _Control your emotions; be one with your environment, _a sage voice advised me. _Use your fear, harness the fear of others. It is yours to command! _Definitely not coming from the same person. Something flickered around me, dancing out of reach. _I can't do this! I'm not a force-user!_

"Sod it all, I have to get outta here!" I spotted a vibroblade clutched in the hand of a dead man. It seemed brute force was the only way to go.

I opened the door and barely had time to register five Sith soldiers before I started hacking at them. I gripped my blaster in the other hand and shot down another, but the blade was definitely the way to go. A red haze danced in front of my eyes as I snarled and whirled, slashing at anything in sight. A hole seared into my shoulder, but desperation kept me going. Another in my left leg. _Later, worry about pain later. _I snarled again and threw my sword at the fourth man. It slammed into his throat and he fell backward, gurgling in a pleasing way.

The last soldier advanced on me, and the pain of injuries swamped back in an almighty wave. My blaster fell from suddenly limp hands. _Crap. Bye-bye world,_ I thought inanely.

But luck was on my side – I heard a couple of blasts and the soldier toppled over sideways. Looking at me from the doorway with something like shock was a Republic officer, if his uniform was anything to go by.

"You've made it just in time!" he said in a deep voice. "There's only one escape pod left. Come on, we can hide out on the planet below!"

Ahhh, I placed him now. Captain Onasi, in charge of the ship. Though Trask had said this Bastila had been. Either way, he seemed fairly competent, and probably the sort who didn't leave people behind. Belatedly I remembered sweet little Jen had a crush on him. _Oh great. Well, whether I'm Jen or someone else, I'm certainly not going to act that one out._ I remembered blushing and scurrying away the one time he had spoken to me. _I am going to slowly dismember whatever creep did this to my mind._

I nodded at him, took a few steps and staggered to my knees. Blood pounded through my head, and I heard a loud rushing noise.

"Ahhh, dammit," someone cursed, and I felt myself being lifted. My grasp on consciousness, and sanity for that matter, was slipping away. Faces and images passed through my mind, and I was vaguely aware of being placed on a seat. Something pricked my arm.

"Hopefully that will be enough until we land," the voice said again. _Who is this? No one touches me. _Something tightened around my waist like a belt. _Oh my love, what have I done? _I could see light above me, but it would be too much of a struggle to reach. I let myself drop away from it, falling into a comforting darkness.

Then sweet, sweet oblivion claimed me.

* * *

xXx

* * *


	2. Chasing a girl

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Two – Chasing a girl**

_- Carth Onasi -_

* * *

The apartment was pretty beat-up, considering it was located on the upper echelons of Tarisian society. Murky crimson blotches marred the drab plasteel walls, marks that told me this environment was not as safe as I would have liked. _But the Sith don't come here much, and that's the important thing. _I sighed. I was sick of sitting here like a blind target, and there were only so many times you could play pazaak by yourself. With an imaginary deck. 

_Damn the Jedi. Damn them for getting me into this mess. _And damn myself for not being able to walk away.

I'd blundered into this place surprisingly quick after the landing – if you could call smashing into several buildings before grinding to an explosive halt outside the local cantina a landing. Still, the resulting smoke and gawking drunks were the only reason I'd managed to slip away without notice. Unfortunately, not without the girl.

I mentally slapped myself. _Just because she's going to be more of a liability than an asset, doesn't mean I have to start wishing the Sith had picked her up. _My eyes slid to the comatose figure on ratty bunk.

The girl was moaning quietly in her sleep. I'd found a medpac on her, and had done my best to patch her up, but... _kolto is what I really need. _I cursed under my breath. I'd never left anyone behind in all my years of service, and I wasn't about to start now... but I'd seen her on board. _A shy academic with a bad case of hero worship on yours truly._ I scowled. One thing I really couldn't cope with was blind devotion. I'd fallen into that trap before myself.

I'd had a bit of a scout around last night, attempting to orientate myself with this foreign world. The urbanized planet consisted of multiple levels of sprawling buildings, integrated into vertical suburbs. Having crashed on the "surface", I was currently hiding out in what was known as Upper Taris, the relatively high-class governmental district. It seemed travel to the lower-levels was strictly controlled; I'd been quite surprised at the lack of air traffic until I heard about the planet-wide quarantine.

_Just what I needed to make things even more exciting. _I'd followed the war as much as any soldier fighting for the Republic, and I'd known about the Sith presence here. Not quite an invasion – Taris had first been a willing economic partner, and over time a not-so-willing base for the Sith forces. Apparently the Tarisian government was neutral in the ongoing war, but as I oh-so-casually checked out my immediate surroundings, I'd realized that the Sith were really the ones in control here.

The place had been literally crawling with them; men garbed in shiny black armour haunted the entrance to half the turbo-lifts. _But hey, look on the bright side, Onasi. If the Sith are spending their time rifling through garbage trucks, then Bastila's still uncaptured._

I'd managed to find a medical centre, headed by a doctor I'd wager had Republic sympathies, considering the grim way he scowled whenever I'd mentioned the Sith. He wasn't very forthcoming with information, but he'd promised to get me some kolto by morning, for what amounted to candy money – which was frankly all I had. _I don't like trusting strangers – especially when they offer salvation for peanuts. But what other choice do I have? _I doubted the girl would last long without kolto, and I didn't exactly see any spare bacta tanks lying about, either.

I sighed again, and glanced around the tiny apartment. A hard bunk lined the dank room on one side, and a grimy, minimalist kitchen on the other. _I suppose beggars can't be choosers. _I was starting to feel edgy and claustrophic, worn out from anxiety over my comatosed comrade, and aggravated at the lack of action. I hated to be sitting around doing _nothing_, waiting for that damn girl to wake up. _Well, there's no reason I can't go out for a bit. I need to see Zelka anyway, and I may as well get my bearings._

I figured it was heading on to early dawn on Taris, and the girl would be alright alone for a bit. I jammed my well-used blaster underneath my shirt, and headed cautiously out of the apartment. The resident aliens threw me curious looks as I walked past, but didn't approach. _They are just as wary as me._

I strode past a merchant Twi'lek who'd set up a kiosk in the building, and avoided his gaze. He had the eager salesman look, completely at odds with the locals who lived here. _Oh great.__Last thing I need is a sale._

"Well, I don't see too many of your kind around here," the fellow boomed at me as I tried to edge surreptitiously past. _Here we go. _"Most of the residents in this old rundown apartment are illegal aliens. My name is Larrim, by the way."

"Uh, hi," I said dismissively in response, and continued walking.

"I know it's really none of my business, but you look like someone who might need to purchase one of these new energy shields. They're the latest thing, you know. Very high tech."

I sighed inwardly as I stopped to face him. "Maybe later."

"Come on, at a price of one hundred credits almost anyone can afford them! They're pretty handy in a fight – could save your life!"

"Unless you're up against vibroblades," I said dryly. _As if I had the credits, anyway._

The Twi'lek looked ready to burst into another enthusiastic spiel.

"Look, I don't have any credits, but when I do I might come back," I told him quickly as I strode off. I had pondered pumping him for information, but I doubted Larrim would be able to tell me anything useful. The aliens seemed to keep to themselves, and I couldn't really blame them, considering the rampant discrimination on Taris. I'd already heard several comments about those 'filthy non-humans littering our streets' from various locals.

I walked outside into the early morning sun, a public courtyard stretching magnificently before me. Other than a few rundown, disused buildings, Upper Taris gleamed and glistened with wealth. A few early-risers dotted the pathways, and their attire was a far cry from the shabby trousers and half-ripped shirt I'd managed to fish out of the apartment locker, presumably left behind by the previous occupant. I grimaced, feeling more out of place here than on Coruscant itself. _Though at least here I'm not forced to wear that hideous ceremonial uniform the Republic is so keen on. _Coruscant had never been my favourite destination

As I meandered towards the medical centre, I started mulling over my predicament. I knew Jedi Shan had escaped, and I also knew that she was the only Jedi who'd managed to. My duty demanded that I do everything possible to rescue her, but it wasn't going to be easy.

If only I knew what this mission had really been about. We'd been en route to Tatooine, and all I'd managed to squeeze out of the Jedi farts was that it had something to do with ruins. Admiral Dodonna herself had forced me to captain the Endar Spire.

…

"_Whatever the Jedi are up to, I know enough that it may be our only chance against the forces of Darth Malak. I need someone I can trust onboard the Endar Spire, Captain." Her dark eyes were seriously intent on mine. Admiral Dodonna was a superior I had a vast amount of respect for, and one who usually listened to my opinions._

"_I want to be on the frontline, Admiral, where I can be useful! I don't see how carting around a bunch of Jedi from planet to planet is going to help the war."_

"_You have your orders, captain," she said briskly as she turned away. I heard her sigh, and she turned to face me once more. A look of grim - almost bleak – determination added another ten years to her already lined face. "We are losing the war, you know that. Whatever the Jedi have up their sleeve may be our only chance."_

_I could understand her reasoning, but my skills would be wasted on this trip. Not to mention I would feel entirely useless. "Yes, but surely someone else could captain the Endar Spire? I can help on the-"_

"_I **said** you have your orders, Captain."_

…_  
_

So there I was, a decorated war hero bowing to every Jedi whim. And there had been enough of them, though that Bastila one was the worst. _And the most important, unfortunately._ I grimaced. Her battle meditation alone had made her a vital asset to the Republic war effort, but her snooty attitude I could have lived without. Still, it was more bearable than whatever scared devoted act this Jen Sahara I rescued would put up. _Who'd have thought she'd be a berserker, though? _I was stunned when I saw her put down four Sith soldiers in an angry rage. It was almost scary how she'd kept going with all those injuries.

_And I don't get why she was on the ship. _I'd checked out her service records, and they were disappointingly brief. She'd grown up in a commune on Deralia. Studied ancient archaeology and anthropology at the Academia there. Apparently, the Jedi had requested her services to check out some mysterious ruins on Tatooine. _That doesn't gel, though. Most of the Jedi on the Endar Spire would know more about ancient ruins than some unknown scholar. They spend all their life fluffing around with historical texts and old artefacts. And if they wanted scholars, surely they'd hire more than just one, barely travelled, girl? According to her records, she'd never even left her home planet before. Something doesn't fit, and I'm going to find out why. _

xXx

A few hours later, and I was on my way back to the apartment. Zelka Forn had loosened up a bit, and informed me that a couple of escape pods had crashed into the Undercity. Which was happily populated with diseased infectious mutants. _And here I thought things couldn't get any worse._

My biggest problem was credits – or lack thereof. I was hoping the girl would be intelligent enough to bounce ideas off, although inwardly I doubted it.

I became aware of a slight commotion as I drew close to the hideout. A Duros was hurriedly dragging what looked like a Sith corpse into the apartment next to mine, and judging by the blood on the floor there had been more than one. _The Sith are here already? By a bantha's ass... can things get any worse?_

"What happened here?" I asked the Duros quickly, stepping in front of him. He jabbered back at me in his own language, and tried to drag the corpse around me. I wasn't falling for that, however; most aliens understood Galactic Basic. _Perhaps aid is the way to go. _I grabbed the other end of the Sith corpse, and nodded to the apartment when the Duros gave me a surprised look.

"So, what happened? I know you can understand me, and I'm just as keen to keep a low profile as you are," I asked him flatly once we were inside. This apartment was identical to the place I'd found, apart from obvious pile of corpses.

The Duros stared at me unblinkingly, and then sighed in defeat. "This isn't the first time the Sith have come in here to cause trouble for us, but hopefully it will be the last," the Duros answered in halting Basic. He lowered his head sadly. "Poor Ixgil. He should never have talked back to that Sith."

"What were the Sith looking for?" I asked cautiously.

"Anything. They like to bully," the alien responded. "It would have meant my death too, if not for that crazy human."

I blinked. _Crazy... human? I thought there were only aliens around here? _A sinking feeling in my gut made itself known. _Stang, it couldn't be, could it? _"I- uh, human?"

"This girl walked into the middle of it, and killed them all. I am astounded a human would come to the aid of a Duros, but she ran away before I could thank her."

"I, uh, I've gotta go," I mumbled as I ran out. I sprinted down the battered corridor to my apartment, hurriedly switched the door open and... _nothing._

_I swear, some omnipotent force is watching me, and having a good ole laugh. _

"Damn, damn damn!" I shouted in frustration, punching the wall and wincing. "What now, Onasi?" I sighed to myself. "Find the crazy girl, or leave her as dead?"

I couldn't do that, but my priority had to be Bastila. I scowled, and forced myself to think rationally. _I have to get some leads on Bastila... find out more about this Undercity. Cantinas are a good place for information, and I can ask around if anyone's seen Jen. If the Sith haven't captured her yet._

I opened the locker to grab my lucky orange flight jacket, but it was missing. Shock assailed me for a moment. _She stole my jacket? Oh, this is personal now._

xXx

The Upper City cantina was overrun with pazaak players, but unfortunately I didn't have a deck. Although with the way the Eagle Squad boys back at base kept kicking my ass, this may have been a blessing in disguise.

My mood was steadily declining. Being forced to rescue two females, both of whom I already disliked, was enough to drive any sane man up the wall.

_Calm down, Onasi. Cantinas are always a good place for easy credits and information. Best place to start._ I'll admit, I was seriously pissed that Jen had run off. Pissed at myself, too. I shouldn't have left a severely injured comrade alone, with no idea where they were. _But I didn't expect her to run off as soon as she woke!_

I grabbed a chair and sat down, having a good look around the place. For all that the cantina was in the Upper City, there seemed to be enough scruffy drunks and disreputable spacers around. _I guess everyone's equal when it comes to alcohol. _A drunken male laugh caught my attention from the opposite corner.

"You're shure pretty when ya smile!" Some seedy guy hitting on an unsuspecting girl, no doubt. _Though she'd have to be pretty simple to fall for that one. _"An' for an' offworlder, you can shure handle Tarisian ale!" The guy was slurring so much he could almost pass for a selkath.

"It's not bad," came the response, a feminine, almost melodious voice. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously, trying to see the girl but the inebriated fellow was in the way. "Helps to drown out thoughts."

The man moved around her, and I had a clear glimpse at the girl's face, shadowed under a mop of curly dark hair. _I can't believe it, _I thought in stunned disbelief as my mouth dropped open._ That's Jen. She ran off to get drunk? _

I was by her side before I knew it, glaring down into surprised green eyes as I grabbed her shoulder. "Are you crazy, Jen Sahara?" I hissed at her.

"Hey, leave the girl alone!" the fool blustered at me. "She's mine!"

I turned to glare at him. "Get out of here, this doesn't concern you," I said in a low voice, hoping the idiot would do the smart thing and leave. _So much for keeping a low profile._

"Hey, it's my hero. She likes you, y'know." The girl giggled at me randomly. Maybe she was already drunk if she was talking about herself in the third person.

"I'm getting you out of here Jen," I said in warning, and then pulled her to her feet. I was once again surprised at just how little she weighed. Probably one of the reasons I kept thinking of her as a girl, although looking at her now I'd pick her age to be closer to thirty.

"Hey, she's my date," the guy slurred at me, refusing to back off. "You're spoiling my fun!" He had an ugly scowl on his face, and I didn't need to hear exactly what his fun would have been.

_This could turn ugly. I need to get Jen out now. _My blaster was in my free hand before I realized it. "Back off."

The man raised his hands in surprise, and tripped backwards. "I don't wan' any trouble!"

I inwardly cursed myself. _That was stupid. Starting a firefight in the local cantina is not the best way to hide from the authorities. _Fortunately for me, the drunk stumbled away, muttering under his breath. I swiftly tried to lug the girl to the exit. She started struggling.

"I can walk! Don't touch me!" she hissed, and I realized dragging a drunken girl through the streets of Upper Taris was about as conspicuous as pulling a gun on a drunk. I let her go, and she lost her balance abruptly, stumbling against me.

"I can't believe you ran off to get drunk!" I condemned, grabbing her arm again, and glancing around to make sure no one was in earshot. There were definitely enough spectators watching our little scene, but fortunately all of them were viewing from a distance.

"I said don't touch me!" Jen snarled viciously, and slammed the palms of her hands into my gut. The air left my lungs in a whoosh and I fell backwards, more astonished than anything else.

The look of violent anger on her face was enough to keep me sprawled there, silent, in the middle of the cantina. I heard a few sniggers from the nearby patrons, and my face warmed in angry humiliation. _Nothing like landing on your ass to make a good first impression._

As quick as lightening, Jen's expression changed to remorse, and then embarrassment. She looked around hurriedly.

"Are you alright, Miss?" A nearby patron came up beside her, shooting me a filthy glare. "Is this man giving you trouble?"

"No!" she said suddenly. "I overreacted. Sorry." She turned to me, fixing apologetic green eyes on me. "I'm sorry about that. I don't know what came over me." She offered me a slim hand to get up, and I stared at it as if it were a diseased gizka. _This girl is completely crazy. She's going to get us both killed._

I pushed myself to my feet and eyed her suspiciously. She still had that contrite expression pasted on her face, but the sheer venom of her earlier attack made me wary.

"I, uh-" I began, not entirely sure how to start.

"I guess we should talk," Jen muttered. "You're Onasi, right? Sit down, and I'll grab us some drinks."

"What?" I gaped at her. _More alcohol? _My anger slowly burned back to life.

"Drinks as in caffa," she grinned suddenly, impishly, "But I had to see your reaction."

I could only stare at her. _First she's as violent and temperamental as a Sith, then she's all apologetic, and now she's making jokes?_

She came back with two mugs, and I realized I was still standing, gaping after her. She glanced at me curiously. "Shall we have a seat?"

"Uh, sure," I muttered, following her to an empty table. The noise in the cantina had risen again, and while I would have preferred our initial conversation to have taken place in the hideout, it looked fairly anonymous in here. _And I'm not sure I could get her back to the apartment. I hate not being able to read people. What happened to the shy girl back on the Endar Spire?_

"I guess I should also apologize for running out," Jen muttered, staring into her mug.

"What, as well as for getting drunk, and causing a scene that could have brought the Sith down on us?" I snapped sarcastically.

She scowled at me, and I could see her struggling to remain calm. For the first time in a few days, I felt vague stirring of amusement. If things hadn't been so serious, it might actually be fun to rile this Jen Sahara up a bit. _Just a bit, mind you, I've been pushed around enough by her already._

"Yes, as well as that. I've only had one drink. I'm not drunk, though I am planning to be." She sighed. "I guess I owe you my life. Thanks."

I inclined my head, but wasn't quite prepared to let it go just yet. "Exactly why did you run out anyway? You're still injured."

She grimaced. "I know, my bones literally ache. As to why," she lowered her head. "I, uh, woke up and heard shots outside. I thought people were coming after me." Something in her voice didn't ring true. And she was avoiding my gaze. "Before I knew it, I was in the middle of a firefight. I just... panicked, and ran - and ended up here. I was planning to go back to the apartment."

_Right. About as plausible as her sugar-sweet tone. _"When? Before or after you got drunk?"

"Uh, after I guess. I really am sorry, I just haven't been thinking straight." She caught my gaze then, big luminous eyes as if appealing to my better nature. _Damn, she didn't need to be pretty as well. _I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, lowering my gaze to the cracked cup of caffa nestled between my hands.

She continued quietly."All I remember is waking up and grabbing this jacket and vibroblade, and running."

"No kidding," I muttered. "And it looks like you've got ale all over my lucky jacket, thank you very much."

She spluttered on her caffa. "This monstrosity is a lucky ja-"

I cut her off. "So, injured and panicked, you decided to rush madly into some firefight, with no idea who or how many possible enemies there were?"

She blushed at that, a first for her I'd wager. "Yes, not the brightest thought, I'll admit."

"And then you decided to go down some Tarisian ale for the heck of it?"

"It seemed like a good idea," she muttered sulkily.

"You're not just reckless, you're insane," I said flatly. "Well, from now on, we'd better do things my way." I regretted the words as soon as they came out of my mouth. _Well done Onasi, lets just fire her up again shall we?_

"We? Since when is there a 'we', Republic?" she demanded, her meek act vanishing like juma juice in a merc bar. _Republic? That almost sounded like an insult._

"Taris is under Sith control." Maybe I should explain a few things to her, she probably had no idea what was going on. "There's no way the Republic will be able to get anyone through the Sith blockade to help us. If we're going to find Bastila and get off this planet, we can't rely on anybody but ourselves."

She frowned at me, looking as if she was trying to figure something out. "You don't like the Sith, you want to rescue this Jedi girl, and you need to get off the planet. Fair enough, I get that. But where does this _we_ come into it?"

My mouth dropped open. "You swore an oath to the Republic, and to defend Bastila!"

"I never swore it!" she hissed, eyes flashing. She breathed in deeply, and seemed to wrest control of herself once more. "I was hired by the Jedi Council to go to Tatooine on the Endar Spire. The ship's destroyed, so I consider that job complete. Besides, I'd just as soon get away from any Jedi."

For once I agreed with her, but she didn't need to know that. "Your job isn't over – Bastila is still alive." I informed her coldly.

"I was never paid," she retorted, leaning back on the stool and folding her arms defensively. "As far as I'm concerned it's over."

_She really would walk out. Just another traitor to the Republic... but the Jedi Council obviously need her, and I will **not** fail in my duty if at all possible. _"I saved your life, Jen." _I hate emotional blackmail... but I don't really have a choice here. _"Even if you have no honour or decency, you still owe me a debt for that."

She visibly cringed, and for the first time sincerely looked like the girl I'd originally picked her for. "Help me rescue Bastila, and we'll call it even." I finished. This unpredictable loose cannon could then be the Jedi's problem, not mine.

She bowed her head, refusing to look at me. "Fine. I guess I owe you that much."

Relieved, I slouched back and had a gulp of the caffa. Disgustingly strong, I was surprised they sold it here. _Well, at least Jen's agreed. I hope that's the end of _that_ conversation._

"How do you even know Bastila's alive?"

_So much for hope. _This was the one issue I didn't want to think about.

"I don't. But Bastila's young, and she has a powerful command of the Force. We survived the crash landing, so I'm willing to bet that she may have, too."

"Did any other Jedi escape the Endar Spire then?" she asked.

"Some Republic soldiers did, but no other Jedi. Bastila's the only one who managed to get to an escape pod." My shoulders slumped as I remembered the battle.

"So it is her then," Jen whispered, seemingly to herself.

"What is her?" I asked suspiciously. She had a vague look on her face, but it disappeared as her attention was snapped back to me.

"Uh, nothing," she mumbled.

_Yeah right. Just who are you, Jen Sahara?_

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Antonius Varus & Dark Lord Daishi - thanks heaps! Hope you keep enjoying :)_

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snackfiend101 - Cheers. Yeah I'm not too good at the summary/title of story thing, am I:P hopefully I'll get more ideas. I've only just encountered fanfiction, so I'm really enjoying reading it on the net. Yep I have read VMorticia's one, I think it's awesome._

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Prisoner 24601 - Thanks :) You're right about the hippie reference, I hadn't seen it before, but it did look odd. I've since updated & taken the reference out._


	3. Battling one's thoughts

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Three – Battling one's thoughts**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

I felt like a spectator watching a duel. The pacifist versus the evil punk. _Ten credits as to who would win,_ I thought sarcastically, but neither identity actually seemed to be _me_. The only history I had – the past of meek Jen Sahara - felt incredibly real. I could almost taste the kakasi trees in bloom, and I remembered hero-worshipping my- _no her-_ oppressive father. But in all these thoughts and memories, the way I interacted was so _wrong_. I couldn't imagine cowering and bowing to the every whim of my family, and trying to please anybody but myself. Running from confrontations, and always trying to save the helpless - even when they were unbearably stupid. It was like I'd been inside someone else's head, watching them as they lived out their life, but having no say in what they did. 

My recollection of the last year was where it all disintegrated. I could vaguely recall some Jedi contacting me, and organizing a study expedition onboard a Republic cruiser. I struggled to remember what I'd been doing for the past six months; it felt like a dream, numb and almost forgotten. In between a history that couldn't be mine, and a present as hazy as a spice trip, it didn't seem feasible that I could be Jen Sahara. So... where did that leave me? Was I actually some sort of sadistic freak who wished to torture countless people for sheer enjoyment and power? I'd only felt brief flashes of this side of myself, yet it was enough to deduce that I- _no, her- _lived in some demented, twisted fantasy world and had delusions of wielding the Force. I didn't want to think of any alternative – but regardless, that identity wasn't me. Couldn't be.

_And this isn't even counting in that Bastila woman, _I thought sourly. So who was I really? The only explanation that made any sort of sense was that I was some third person, who'd somehow lost her entire memory, and had two others pushed in instead. _Hmm, that sounds really plausible. I'm not sure I could even get the drunks at the cantina to believe that one. _Considering my Jedi guard, and Jen's mission to look at ruins, it had something to do with the blasted Jedi Order. And I was willing to bet my life that they didn't want me remembering anything other than Jen Sahara, the pushover.

_Well, let's continue on with the Jen act, until I can get as far away from any Jedi as possible. Except for this damn foolhardy mission that Captain Flyboy has wrangled me into. The last thing I want to do is rescue the very Jedi who seems to have me on a leash!_

Why did I agree to go on this quest anyway? Part of me still logically reasoned how easy it would be to slip away and disappear, but my own code of honour wouldn't allow me. _He did save my life after all. Hah! If I have a code of honour, then I can't be the Force-using evil bitch. _Not that I could use the Force.

And that brought up another thought I was desperately trying to ignore. Jen had no Force sensitivity whatsoever. Evil Bitch seemed to think she did. I... somehow sensed _something _back on the Endar Spire, but to use it? I'd tried then, and again in the cantina when Onasi had grabbed me, but to no avail. Did I really want to?

He was watching me now, with a suspicious look on his face. I couldn't blame him, I'd been acting like a raving lunatic since he found me, but I was having a really hard time trying to shut Evil Bitch up.

_I guess it's time to start on this Jedi hunt then. _I remembered being told about Jedi Shan back on the Endar Spire – a powerful Jedi who had the ability to influence the morale and well-being of entire armies. I'd even met her once – I had a vague memory of cowering like a frightened jawa before her. _And she's mind-linked to me. Yay. _If I couldn't win Carth over, I doubted I could make the Jedi in my head believe all was well. _Though she seems to have enough to cope with. _Feelings of anger and disdain had been radiating from her since I'd opened my eyes back in the apartment, strong enough that I genuinely **had** panicked when I'd heard a commotion outside.

Suddenly, Bastila's presence in my head froze. _What happened now? Some Rodian hit on her? _I blinked. _No... it's like she's gone unconscious... or something._

"Hello?" Carth demanded angrily. "Are you even listening to what I'm saying?" He was scowling at me again.

"Uh, sorry," I mumbled.

"Yeah, I know, your favourite word," he grumbled. "Are you sure you only had one drink?"

"Yes," _Calm. Stay calm. _"But my head's been hurting a lot since I injured it. I've just been feeling really confused." _That at least is the truth._

He didn't seem to buy it, judging by the suspicious look in his eyes.

"Look, I know I've been acting quite..." I sighed, trailing off in defeat. "Is there any chance we could just start over? My head is literally killing me, and I'm not sure how much more I can take."

A look of concern crossed over Carth's face, and I realized he wasn't actually that bad looking. _Hah, I **will **get you eating out of my hand, I swear._

"Ahhh, I forgot," Carth said suddenly, and grabbed something out of his pocket. "I managed to get a shot of kolto. You'd better take it now; you still look pretty beaten up."

_Gee thanks, flyboy. _"Thank you," I said demurely, taking it from him and injecting it quickly into my forearm.

Kolto was fairly fast acting, and although I wouldn't be up to taking part in one of those duels next door, at least I'd start to feel vaguely human again. The kolto burned comfortingly through my veins, and after a few minutes the pounding in my head lessened somewhat.

"So," I began, "any idea where we should start looking for Bastila?" I took another sip of my caffa, but it was now cold. I grimaced in disgust.

"There are reports of a couple of escape pods crashing down into the Undercity," Carth commented quietly. "That's probably a good place to start. But the Undercity is a dangerous place; we don't want to go there unprepared."

"Okay, so time to make some credits, buy some armour, avoid the Sith and find the girl?" I tried hard not to sound sarcastic. _I'm Jen, remember? Play nice._

"Nobody will be looking for a couple of common grunts like us," Carth retorted defensively. He'd caught the sarcasm then. "And if we're careful, we can move about the planet without attracting notice – a luxury Bastila won't have."

Bastila was still frozen in my head, and I was beginning to doubt she'd be able to move at all. Carth was right though, it should be fairly easy to stay inconspicuous provided I stopped acting like a stimmed-up thug with too much testosterone. Although _I_ hadn't been the one to pull out a blaster in the middle of a busy cantina. On the other hand, all the patrons were now leaving us alone.

I shrugged off my internal monologue. "Then we need to find an easy way to make some cash. There's a dueling ring next door I wouldn't mind trying, when I'm feeling a little more alive."

"Yes, uh, I was pretty impressed with the way you took out those Sith soldiers back on the Endar Spire."

I could feel myself blushing. _Stop it, already! Act like Jen, don't **be** her. _"I think I get a little crazy in battle," I mumbled.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." His tone was dry. Very dry. I glanced at him sharply, but his face was a mask.

"Anyway," I continued, "got any other ideas for credits? Or should we think about stealing armour?" _I really shouldn't have said that. _I groaned inwardly. Judging by first impressions, Carth was a pretty straight-up sort of guy.

A look of distaste crossed his face. "I'd rather not, but we may not have any choice. Unless you're any good at pazaak?"

I had a vague recollection of the gambling game. Mostly revolving around luck and psychology. "I'll give it a bash, but I need some cards."

Carth nodded in assent, and we left our table for the pazaak den. An old fellow called Garouk sold us his deck for fifty credits, which had Carth grumbling. When I took his last forty for wagering, he almost expired on the spot.

"Hey, it was your idea," I snapped as he glowered at me.

"You'd better make that money back," he muttered. "We're totally broke now."

"Just watch me flyboy," I winked, and walked off. I wasn't really as confident as I was acting, but the game couldn't be too hard, surely? Garouk had explained the rules, and I was certain some part of me had played it before. _If only I could remember._

I headed over to a player Garouk had said was named Niklos, and he glanced up as I approached.

"What do you want?" he leered at me. "Have you come here just to bother me, or do you want to test yourself against the best pazaak player on Taris?" He laughed uproariously.

_And that's funny because…? _"Let's play," I said briskly.

"I'm going to enjoy relieving you of your credits almost as much as I'm going to enjoy humiliating you!" Niklos laughed again, the noise as irritating as a slag grinder. _I only need to wipe the floor with him in pazaak. I do not need to embed a vibroblade into his skull, nor rip out his intestines and wrap them around his neck. _I could feel my jaw clenching as I tried to shut my mind down.

"You going to play, or just laugh stupidly?" I snapped, slapping my pazaak deck on the table.

"Sure, how many credits do you want to give me?" he sneered.

"Let's call it twenty," I muttered, struggling to stem the tide of anger I could feel surging inside me. _I could always knock him out cold and take his credits that way. _No, it would be more satisfying to beat him at his own game._ And I will **not** hurt people indiscriminately. I am **not** Evil Bitch._

Niklos started the match by turning a card face over, and after a few deals was up to a score of eighteen. I scowled inwardly, that was a little too close for my liking. I was still on a total of twelve. He smirked at me.

"You should try for twenty," I muttered hopefully at him. "I bet the next card's a two."

"I – I think I'll try for twenty," he told me in his thick accent. I blinked in surprise. "I believe the next card is a two."

It was a 10, and round one to me. _How eerie. Can't believe he took my advice._

"Ahhh, I always need to warm up in the first round," Niklos blustered as I flipped over a card. I nodded slowly at him, wondering.

Three cards later, and Niklos flipped over a 3 to make a total of 19. _Crap._

"I don't think nineteen will really clinch this round," I bluffed.

Niklos looked at me, considering. "You know, I don't think nineteen will really clinch this round," he said, and proceeded to flip over an 8.

Goosebumps rose on my spine. _What's this guy on? Some new spice that induces gullibility?_

A few hours later, and no one in the cantina would play me anymore. Carth was still seated in the corner, occasionally throwing astonished looks my way. He couldn't have been more surprised than me, however, for it wasn't really skill with cards that helped me clean the place out. _I tricked them all into playing like morons. How? All of the players just did what I suggested, and their card sense flew out the garbage chute. I even convinced that old fellow not to use his sidedeck! Did I use the Force without realizing it?_ No, it couldn't be that simple, surely? I didn't know how to use the Force. _But if my conversation skills were so persuasive, I'd have Onasi trusting me by now. _

And it wasn't just Niklos who'd emptied out his purse for me. Three other poor saps had blindly followed suit.

_What if I really am Evil Bitch? No... that can't be right - even if she thinks she's a Force-user, her personality feels just as foreign as Jen's, though slightly more disturbing. _Although Jen did seem to have a worrying obsession for cute little animals. _But Jen's memories are a lot more real. And intact... mostly. _

"Wow, we need to find us another cantina," Carth said as he walked over.

"Might be easier said than done," I commented wryly, "my reputation will probably precede me." I wasn't sure if I could repeat that performance. The whole experience scared me a little, and I didn't know what to make of it.

"How did you do that? You should have warned me you were a card shark."

"I- well, I was lucky."

Carth shot me a disbelieving look, but let it drop.

I yawned and stretched, grimacing at the aches creaking down my back. "I'm going to head off for some sleep I think."

Carth nodded in agreement as I stood and walked out. I passed a group of giggling noblewoman absently, but stopped as one turned to speak to me.

"Where did you get those clothes— a trash compactor in the Lower City?" Her friend laughed outrageously, and I struggled to keep a polite face. "And where are those drinks we ordered?"

"I'm sorry," I said sweetly, moving to walk away. "I'm not your waiter." I was personally impressed at my own restraint.

She ignored what I said. "Why is the help here so incompetent?" she complained to her giggling friend, and then turned to waggle her finger at me. "One word from Daddy and I could have you fired!"

"Shut up, you spoiled brat!" I snarled. _Waggle her finger at me, will she?_ Heat pounded through my veins, and my fists clenched instinctively.

"How dare you speak to me like that!" she gasped, her face whitening in outraged surprise. She stood and stepped away hurriedly. "Daddy's going to hear about this!"

"You know, when I said nobody would be looking for us," Carth's voice in the background slowly dispelled the red rage consuming me. "It went with the assumption that we'd be acting inconspicuous. Silly of me to assume that about you, I know." He sounded- well, more irritated than anything else. It irked me that he was right yet again.

"I'd apologise, but you'd probably just complain again," I muttered. To my surprise, he actually laughed.

"At least things don't get dull around you," he commented. "But in all seriousness, you- we – need to look and act like common Tarisian citizens. Yelling at aristocrats is not the way to go."

"I'll get better control of my temper." The last thing I wanted was another lecture from him.

"For someone who's fairly shy, you sure do have one heck of a short fuse." He said it like a question. I knew he was wary of me, with good reason. _He's not the easiest to win over, though. Suspicious bastard._

I just stared at him in mute response, and he raised his hands in entreaty. "Okay, okay! I'll drop it – for now."

_Hah, that almost sounded like a threat. Bring it on, Republic._

xXx

I woke up sometime during the night, my shoulder aching and my head throbbing. _Ahhh, what I'd give for an adrenastim. A drink would be almost as good. _Carth was asleep on the floor, after insisting that I take the bed. _He's one of those traditional heroes, probably likes to open doors for ladies and rescue helpless victims. If only I could reliably act like one, _I smirked to myself, _then I might have a better chance at pulling the wool over his eyes._

Well, I doubted I'd be able to get back to sleep, and I figured moving about might loosen up my muscles. I silently changed into a set of drab clothes Carth had given me after sulkily grabbing his flight jacket back. I rolled my eyes at the thought. _Republic pilots and their lucky charms._

Bastila was still out cold in the back of my head, like a frozen ice-pop, occasionally reminding me of her existence. I wondered briefly what this Jedi was like. _She seemed snooty, all high and mighty, from what I heard of her. And very young, to have been given command of a Republic cruiser. _I sighed, and turned my thoughts to other things. Bastila was one of the many topics I had no plausible answer to.

_Well, time to scope out this building, _I told myself as I stealthily walked to the door. There was no way I was going to wake Onasi up for this one, as I fully intended to loot whatever I found. I'd filched a low-grade tech spike from the inebriated lout who'd bought me a drink, and I was starting to wonder if I'd been a smuggler or thief of some description. _I feel like I know how to break into places. I can't remember it though. Jen wouldn't even dream of breaking in anywhere, and I can't imagine Evil Bitch fiddling around with a lockpick. It'd probably be beneath her, _I thought sourly.

The dark hallway was long abandoned, and I walked up to the nearest door, listening intently for any sounds. _Nothing. Either nobody's home, or someone's asleep. _It didn't bother me greatly either way, and some dim part of me realized I was acting rather reckless. _But hey, we need the credits. _Ever since I'd woken up with two personalities on the Endar Spire, I'd been taking the crazy road. It seemed like the best way to stop thinking.

With a practiced hand, I automatically keyed into the tech lock and bypassed the security. The door swished open. I blinked, stunned. _I've done this a lot. Where? Why? I wish I knew the truth._

xXx

An hour or so later, and my mind was disintegrating once more. I leaned against a corridor wall, shaking, sweat beading down my forehead. _I can't go on like this. I keep hounding myself for control, and I keep failing miserably._

It had been fine - the first three apartments. I hadn't really expected to find much, and other than a small stash of credit chits and a long, concealing coat I fancied, I'd walked away from the first two places empty-handed. The third, however, was the jackpot. Obviously some shady dealings took place in this grimy excuse for a building, as I was fortunate enough to stumble on somebody's rather impressive stash of weaponry. I'd noticed a small pile of stims on the table first – those I'd be keeping secret from Carth. From there, pilfering a spare blaster and a handful of grenades was automatic; I'd hesitated on what looked like some sort of modified Mandalorian assault rifle. Honestly, it was amazing what some people left lying about.

_But the next apartment... _

The findings had left me careless; I'd waltzed in without checking the place was empty. _Reckless. _I'd woken a couple of Bith who'd mistaken me for an Exchange thug, and immediately started begging for their lives. The sense of superiority and _rightness_ that had swamped me overwhelmed any other thought. One of the Bith had literally cowered from his small bunk, pleading in a high-pitched tone for more time. Whatever their problem with the Exchange was – I hadn't cared; all that mattered was that they feared me. From somewhere came the conviction was that this was how the galaxy should be. _I am to be feared, and obeyed._

"Don't hurt us!" one of them had begged. And as quick as a kath hound, my feelings had changed. _How could I do this? Break into some poor creatures' apartment, and terrify them so? I should be begging their forgiveness, offering to somehow make up for this slight!_

I'd settled for running out of there.

Anger, hate, and self-loathing swirled through my mind in an explosive mix. I was losing control; my mind was waging war with itself and no matter how it turned out – I'd lose. _It's like I have two – or three - freaking personalities. _I shuddered against the wall. Staying here – not too far from the Bith's apartment – possibly wasn't in my best interests, either.

I closed my eyes and swallowed. _I need to put more effort into this. I need to be Jen, until I'm in a safer place and have time to work it all out. I can do it, if I just try a little harder._

With shaky new resolve I took a deep breath, and opened my eyes again. _Time to get back, drop off this loot._ I fully intended to bypass the other apartments, until I heard quiet sobbing within one. My curiosity overcame any common sense I had, and I walked closer. It sounded like a woman – alone and upset. The door was unlocked; I opened it warily.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" a rather pretty woman demanded, lowering hands from tear-stained cheeks. She was curled up on a battered sofa, hugging her legs to her chest. "You can't just barge into someone's home!"

_Heh, wanna bet? _I silenced myself. "I'm sorry, I was just investigating the area."

"That's no excuse! You can't get away with wandering into people's apartments because you're curious!" she lectured me sharply, and then took a deep breath. "But at least you're more polite than that pig, Holdan."

I looked at her inquisitively. "Holdan? Who's that?"

"Just one of Davik's men who can't keep his hands to himself." _Ooh, I hate people like that. _"But all he got for his trouble was a nasty scar from my vibroblade! Too bad I'm the one still paying the price," the woman continued, sighing and looking down at her hands.

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

"I... I don't want to talk about it. I'm in enough trouble as it is. Besides, I don't know if I can trust you."

_Time to practice my acting skills. _And I did need practice. _Time to prove I can control myself. _"I'm sorry for walking in here. I heard you outside, and I guess I just wanted to see if you were alright. If you want someone to talk to – even a stranger like me – I'd be happy to listen. You can trust me, it'll go no further." I said my little speech sincerely; pathetically proud at how it came out. _Maybe Evil Bitch has gone to sleep for the night, _I thought grimly. _I hope so._

"Uh, yes – I believe I can trust you. I guess it can't go any further," the woman answered, her voice fading out rather strangely for a moment. I felt a mild surprise that she so quickly warmed to me. "When I cut Holdan it made him back off, but it also embarrassed him in front of his friends. Holdan's a spiteful little hutt-slug!" she burst out. "He went out and put a bounty on my head for what I did! That's why I'm hiding out here."

I felt myself go suddenly still, and dark thoughts raged through my mind. _Easy money! Just what I need! _I blanched, and staggered sideways. My vision of her drab apartment blurred and faded. _No! She's an innocent woman! _I felt my hands hit the floor. _But I need the credits, and if I don't kill her someone else will, so what's the problem? _Cool plasteel pressed against my face. _I should be helping her get out of this, the poor lady! How can I even contemplate something like that?_

I could feel someone shaking me. "Are you alright? Wake up! What's wrong?" I opened eyes to see the woman I'd been talking to, shaking me gently. She looked alarmed and concerned. _Concerned for someone who'd been thinking about killing her. That really puts me in my place._

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, and pushed myself up. "I really am – forgive me. I've been sick recently, and obviously not recovered."

"What are you doing up and about then?"

"Overdoing things, I guess." With her help, I scrambled to my feet, and my head cleared somewhat. The voices fled once more. "I'm sorry about your plight, I wish I could help."

"I wish you could too," she said sadly. "My name's Dia, by the way."

"I'm Jen," I responded. "I'd best get going. I hope things work out."

"Thanks. Go see a doctor, okay?" she said as I walked out the door.

I pondered that suggestion as I dumped the loot back in the apartment, worry pinching my nerves. Carth was still soundly asleep, snoring gently in the corner. _What could I say to a doctor? Hi, I think I'm three people and I'm going crazy? _Yeah, that'd go down well.

_No, I can't tell anyone about this. If I have to keep it from the Jedi, I'd be stupid to let anyone else know. _

I was wide awake now, and decided a walk outside might clear my head. A few Sith guards were slouching against some stores, and a couple of drunks were quietly singing, but apart from that Upper Taris was pretty empty. Faint light was starting to touch the horizon, and I realized that it would be morning soon.

_I need to control this, _I thought determinedly. _I can fight these thoughts. I know I can. _I had an intuitive belief that I could do whatever I set my mind to, provided I was determined enough. _I'll beat this. And I'll convince everyone that I'm still sweet Jen, I swear it._

Myself totally convinced, I felt a little more at peace. I turned, and started heading back to the hideout. _I'll be fine._

A voice from the dark depths of my mind whispered something. _Overconfidence leads... _but I couldn't recall the rest.

* * *

xXx

* * *


	4. Blaster Boy

_**Disclaimer - see chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Four – Blaster Boy**

_- Carth Onasi -_

* * *

_Another day, another ship to shoot down, _I thought drowsily as consciousness trickled in. I yawned, and the dream of battling on the frontlines slowly receded. _Taris, I'm on Taris. Chasing down a Jedi with a Coruscant-sized ego, and babysitting a crazy lunatic whose personality changes more often than her clothes. Thank you, Admiral Dodonna. _I opened my eyes and stretched, loosening the kinks from my bones. I could feel the cold, hard floor underneath the ratty blanket, and grimaced. I wouldn't dream of forcing an injured comrade to sleep on the ground, although Jen's look of sardonic disbelief when I insisted she have the bed had been enough to make me consider it. 

I turned my head at the thought of her, and almost jumped upright when I saw the empty, rumpled sheets.

"No way," I groaned hoarsely, "you've got to be kidding me." Despair kicked in my gut. _She's run off again?_

I sat up slowly, dropping my head into my hands. Various swear words passed through my mind, but none really seemed appropriate – or strong enough. _Right, I'll check the cantina, and if she's not there then I'll have to abandon her. _The thought made me sick to my stomach. _No other choice. I have to focus on rescuing Bastila._

I stood up in grim determination, kicking the blankets to one side. After splashing some water on my face and grabbing my jacket from the locker, I noticed a pile of gear on the floor. I frowned – that hadn't been there last night. _What's this?_

A backpack, about half full with frag and flash grenades. A spare blaster and a vibroblade sticking out of it. _Is this Jen's way of apologizing for disappearing? Sorry I'm running out on the Republic, but here, have a grenade?_

I sighed. _And people wonder why I don't trust, _I thought sourly. _Damn you, Jen Sahara._

Suddenly the door opened, and the very scourge of my thoughts walked in.

I stared at her in surprise. Her short dark hair was a mess, sticking outwards as if she'd never heard of a hairbrush, and the tatty beige shirt she wore hung un-tucked over loose-fitting trousers. "I thought you'd run off!" I blurted before I could think.

She smiled calmly at me, and it was then I noticed her peaceful expression.

"Just went for a walk, that's all," she answered quietly.

_Right. _She looked serene for the first time since she woke up - if a bit pale.

"Are you okay?" I asked suspiciously. I didn't believe her when she was acting meek, angry, _or_ peaceful.

"Yes, I am now. Went for a stroll around Upper Taris," she explained vaguely, moving to sit on the hard bunk.

"Picked these up on your stroll, did you?" I muttered, pointing accusingly at the backpack.

"I- well," she hedged, evading my gaze. A small amount of colour returned to her white face. "I had a bit of a look about. It's amazing what you can find lying around."

_Uh huh. A thief to top it all off. Though I suppose we could use the gear. _I said nothing in response, unsure whether I should lecture her or inventory her loot.

"I know what you're thinking," she told me flatly, fierce green eyes meeting mine. I realized I was still scowling at her, and relaxed my face. "But the sooner we're equipped, the sooner we can find Bastila, and surely that's what you want?"

"I guess. Doesn't mean I have to like the way you're approaching it," I grumbled.

She rolled her eyes and shrugged. "Fine. I'll stop stealing then."

I peered at her. _I don't believe that either. _"Alright," I said slowly. _No point in continuing this – we should just get going._ "How about we start the day with breakfast?"

Her stomach growled loudly in response, and she jumped, before smiling hesitantly. "I guess that means I agree with you."

Jen was ready to go after pulling on a long dark coat I didn't recognize. I took a few minutes to make myself presentable, and then we walked out of the apartments in relative silence. Although I was trying to keep my peace with the girl for once, today she was being even more insufferable by responding to my feeble conversation starters with clipped one-word answers. I could feel my grumpiness returning, and lapsed into silence as we trudged across the Tarisian courtyard.

We'd almost reached the cantina when I heard a shout; turning to face the commotion, I saw a lavishly dressed woman pointing towards us. An Aqualish and a Rodian flanked her, and I could swear the Aqualish cracked his knuckles in readiness.

I groaned. _Frelling wonderful, it's Jen's noblewoman friend. _Jen had stopped beside me, her eyes narrowing. _Too much to hope they'll leave us in peace._

"That's the cantina wench!" the woman cried, still pointing. The thugs advanced, the Rodian smirking in what I thought was anticipation. I couldn't see any weapons on them, but this was Upper Taris, after all. The Sith were liable to arrest anybody waltzing around with a visible blaster – even the supposed bodyguards of whoever this noblewoman was. My own blaster was strapped to my side, hidden under the trusty jacket Jen was still pulling faces at.

"I don't want any trouble," I warned, in a tone I hoped would convince them that I was the real trouble. The Rodian laughed, and resignation settled throughout me as the two thugs stepped closer. _I take it there's no getting out of this one. I just hope we can scare them off quickly – before we attract any attention._

"You should be more polite to your betters, gutter scum," the Aqualish hissed in passable Basic, directing his comment to both me and Jen.

Jen tensed at my side; I had an irrational moment of worry for her safety before reminding myself of the fight I saw on the Endar Spire. _It's just a bunch of thugs – it's catching the eye of the Sith that's the real danger here. _At least we were round the side of the cantina in a small cul-de-sac, partially hidden from view of the open courtyard.

I glanced at Jen; by unspoken agreement I took a step forward to face the stockier Aqualish. He grunted and leapt at me. His fist punched out in a roundhouse; I dodged and grabbed his arm, using his own momentum to hurl him to the ground. As I jumped forward to straddle him, the bastard kicked his legs up deep into my midsection. I staggered back, momentarily winded as the Aqualish scrabbled back to his feet.

A gurgled scream caught my attention; my eyes widened as I saw Jen wielding a vibroblade stuck in the Rodian's side. I stiffened in alarm, whirling back to see the Aqualish gaping in surprise at his injured mate. I grabbed the opportunity to land a solid punch to the thug's face, and tried not to wince as my knuckles slammed forcefully into his jaw.

Jen snarled and withdrew her blade in a vicious yank. The Rodian shrieked, staggering backwards and clutching at his side. Surprisingly, the Aqualish ran quickly to his friend's side, pulling the gasping Rodian upright and looking ready to retreat.

"Aww, what's the matter?" Jen drawled mockingly. "Two ickle humans too tough for you?"

"Jen!" I hissed, outraged. _First she pulls out a vibroblade – a vibroblade! – in a Sith patrolled area, and now she wants to provoke them further?_ The Aqualish looked ready to attack again, but glanced back at his moaning companion.

"This isn't over," he grunted, supporting his friend with one hand and cradling his bruised face with the other. While I would've preferred to entirely avoid this sort of brawl, part of me couldn't help a twinge of smugness at the purple bruising already showing on the Aqualish's face. "If we see you again, you won't be so lucky."

Jen laughed; a cold, malicious sound. "Go on, run like the little cowards you are." She gave a dismissive, insulting wave with one hand.

"Jen, _stop it!_" I stormed over to her, ready to shake some sense into the crazy girl. "Are you completely nuts, or do you want to get us both killed?"

Her face snapped to glare at me, and the look in her eyes was... _rage. Senseless rage. _I took a step back instinctively at the insane glow in her bright green eyes. _Great going Onasi, lets charge a berserker in full swing._

A small part of me noticed the Aqualish retreat strategically, dragging the wounded Rodian along with him. The aristocracy had run off a long time ago. But mostly I was focused on Jen; the battle lust storming through her face was enough to - if not scare me, then at least make me very, very wary.

Jen shivered, and then at once her expression shattered, disintegrating like a thousand shards of ferracrystal. Shock, confusion and perhaps even anguish danced through her stunned eyes before she turned to stare numbly at the weapon still clutched in her hand.

"Put that away – it's broad daylight!" I hissed, deciding it was safe to berate her again. The thugs had now disappeared, but already I could see two gaping Tarisians eyeing us from a distance.

She didn't reply, still staring unblinkingly at her weapon. A tendril of concern inched through my anger.

"Jen, what is it?" I asked sharply.

"I could have sworn..." She looked up at me, confusion colouring her face. "I could have sworn my blade glowed red there for a minute."

"With the way you go berserk, I wouldn't be surprised if everything you saw was red," I muttered, striding down the cul-de-sac. "Let's get out of here. Now."

"Well, at least I managed to scare them off," she laughed weakly, following me around the cantina building.

"You're lucky the Sith weren't around," I grumped at her. "That was inordinately thick of you. All those idiots wanted to do was rough us up a bit – all _we_ needed to do was get the first blow in. But _no_, you had to shove a vibroblade – how the stang did you manage to hide that, anyway? We're not in the frelling Lower City yet-"

"Onasi-"

"-the Sith _rule_ up here Jen, so much for being sodding inconspicuous-"

"Onasi!"

"What?" I snapped, stopping to unleash a furious glare at her. To my further annoyance – and perhaps even mortification – she looked amused. _Amused._

"You've walked right past the cantina entrance," she said mildly.

I opened my mouth, processed her words, and snapped it shut again. She nodded to the door – which I had indeed strode right past – a smirk curving her lips.

"Anyone ever tell you that you curse more when you're angry?" she teased lightly.

My brows lowered further. In some alternate universe - if things hadn't been so dire - maybe I would have laughed with her. Maybe. "This isn't some sort of game," I made out between clenched teeth. "This is serious. Dead serious."

She stared at me mutely for a minute, before taking on an exasperated look. "Okay, so flashing around a weapon outside is probably worse that pulling out a blaster in a cant-"

She at least had the sense to refrain from completing that sentence. I stood glaring at her silently until at last her expression eased into something approaching resignation. She sighed softly. "You're right. I'm sor-"

"Don't!" I bit out. _Not another apology! Peace,_ _I think I like her better when she's angry. _"Look," I sighed, my hand on the cantina door. "Let's just go eat something, alright? And then I might take part in some of those duels."

"You?"

"Well, who else?" I said sharply. "I happen to be pretty accurate with my blasters. And if you think I'm going to let you partake in those duels, when you'd probably go and kill everyone in sight, then have another think."

I could see her struggle between anger and amusement. _Heh, she really doesn't like to be told what to do, does she?_

"Fine, you do the duels," she mumbled sulkily. I couldn't help a small, victorious smirk.

I calmed down somewhat over the bland cantina meal - regurgitated goop that reminded me of field rations. I couldn't quite forget the Tarisian citizens who'd noticed our stand-off with the thugs, and kept one eye warily on the exits. I assumed Jen was making an effort to behave, what with the sickeningly meek act she kept up as we ate. The shy, polite comments she issued were forced, and more annoying than hengi lice in your bedclothes. For some reason, I had a small urge to make her lose her temper again. _How irrational of me. If I actually succeed, she's liable to call down every Sith in the vicinity. But the shy act is really annoying. At least she's not blushing every time I look at her, though._

"Flyboy," she said hesitantly, fiddling with her fork. She looked up at me, fluttering her eyelashes. _Oh, you've got to be kidding me. _"Can I ask you something?"

_Does she really think I buy this act? I wonder just how far she'll play along..._

"I'm all ears, beautiful."

Jen looked shocked, and blurted out: "keep addressing me like that and you might lose an ear or two!" She instantly clapped a hand over her mouth, aghast.

_Not very far it seems. She really doesn't know the meaning of self-control, does she? _I couldn't help it, I laughed out loud. "A little touchy are we?" I snickered at her. "Is there something else you'd prefer I call you?"

"How about my name?" Her words came out angry, and almost... whiny.

_I'm probably pushing this too far... but what the heck. She deserves it._

"Don't get yourself in a twist about it, gorgeous. I didn't mean anything by it," I said mildly.

"There you go again!" she hissed, outraged.

I laughed uproariously, but then noticed the murderous glint in her eyes. _Short fuse, remember? This is fun, but any moment now she'll pull out her vibroblade again. I wouldn't put it past her._

"Alright, alright! If it'll make you feel better, you can call me something. Go ahead, come on, I can take it."

She seemed to relent a little, fury fading to mere anger. "How about sexist worm?"

"Is that it?" I goaded, "come on, you can do better than that."

"Lobotomized gamorrean!" she snarled at me.

"Ouch!" I spluttered. "That is better," I grinned at her. "Well, I bet beautiful doesn't sound so bad in comparison, does it?"

She looked at me blankly, and a small smile began to creep over her face. "How can you be so-" she stopped. "You're such a pain, you know that?"

"Guilty as charged," I said, and stood up, heading over to the duel ring. _And it stopped whatever line of questioning she had in mind, too._

The organizer of the duel ring was a Hutt named Ajuur, and he seemed pretty eager for fresh meat in the duel. _Of course he is, more credits for him. Sithspawn Hutts, the lot of them. But should be good money for us._

Ajuur was busy laying down the law of dueling in Basic, with a thick, almost garbled accent. "Most fighters in the duel ring use vibroblades or stun sticks because the ring's pretty small, but a few of the duelists prefer blasters. Use whichever you like."

"And nobody ever dies?" I questioned suspiciously. "How come I get the feeling you're trying to take us for a ride?

The Hutt laughed, a slurring, wet noise that made me want to shudder. "The duel ring has energy suppressors to make sure nobody dies. Your choice of weapons will be examined and limited before you enter the duel, but we keep a medic droid on hand in case of serious injuries," he grunted. "So, are you interested?"

"Here," Jen spoke up from beside me, handing me a blaster. "Want to use two?"

I stared incredulously at her. "You had a blaster hidden on you as well?" I ignored the mental voice that pointed out the gun strapped underneath my jacket; _I_ wasn't hiding a vibroblade, ready to whirl it around Upper Taris as soon as we waltzed into the first hint of trouble.

She shrugged, looking down at her coat. It was then that I realized just how concealing and bulky it was. _She's probably hidden a whole arsenal underneath that, _I thought sourly. _If I didn't know better, I'd swear she was Mandalorian._

"Well, I-"

"Oh, nevermind," I muttered, and turned to face Ajuur. He seemed to be smirking at us, but it was hard to tell considering his tubby face. "I'll do it."

"Good – new blood for the ring!" he rumbled. "But you need a nickname, like Ice or Deadeye or Twitch. Good nicknames make people bet more. Hmmm... what's a good nickname for you?"

"Anything will do," I shrugged. I certainly wasn't going to give him my real name.

"Well, you're new here. People won't recognize you... I know! From now on in the duel ring people will know you as the Mysterious Stranger!"

Jen snickered, a scornful sound. I scowled. _How cliché. _"I suppose it'll do."

"No, call him Blaster Boy!" Jen guffawed. Ajuur turned his beady eyes on her. "If he's going to use two, it's perfect!"

"I suppose it has a certain ring to it," Ajuur conceded.

"No!" I said, horrified. _Blaster Boy? Sounds like some cheap action holo-vid star! _Jen laughed gleefully.

"And we have used 'Mysterious Stranger' on the last two offworlders, it's getting worn out." Ajuur nodded to Jen. "Blaster Boy it is!"

"What?" I snapped. "Could you think of a tackier name?"

"Stop arguing Blaster Boy," Jen giggled at me. "Time to get ready for your first duel!"

I glared furiously at her. _She is going to pay for this._

xXx

_Well, I suppose I could call it a productive day, _I thought as I limped slowly out of the arena. _I hadn't thought the last duel would be so tough, though. _I'd taken out the first two with no real problem, but that Ice had been a rough challenge. _Best to quit while I'm ahead... and between these six hundred credits and Jen's pazaak winnings, we should be set for the Undercity._

The day was almost over, and I felt like crawling back to the apartment, bandaging my wounds, and falling asleep. _You're getting soft, Onasi._

Jen was having a drink by the bar as I walked slowly over to her.

"You're not trying to get drunk again, are you?" I asked suspiciously.

"Why not?" she countered. "We're set for credits now - tomorrow we can buy our gear and head down to the lower levels." She took a long swallow. "Seems like a perfectly good reason to have a few drinks."

"No way, sister," I said coldly. "You lose your temper easily enough when sober. Getting drunk is just begging for Sith attention."

"You're pretty obsessed with the Sith, you know that?" she snapped back, green eyes flashing.

"What, because I'm trying not to get caught?" I lowered my voice. "We're fugitives, remember? Attracting notice is not a good idea."

She calmed down somewhat. "They've left us alone so far."

"Out of sheer luck more than anything else! I can't believe they didn't notice our fight with that woman's thugs earlier."

She paused, and stared down at her hands in silence. After awhile she asked, "what made you decide to join the Republic, Onasi?"

_What sort of a question is that? _I looked away, uncomfortable. "I've always been a military man. It doesn't take a genius to figure out which side is the right one."

"You think it's all that black and white?" Her voice was surprisingly neutral, for such a question.

"Oh come on," I said, exasperated. _Where is she going with this?_ "It's obvious that Malak's a ruthless tyrant who'll crush anyone who gets in his way... just like Revan was. Experience has shown that the Sith won't stop until the Republic lies in ruins. Malak and his forces don't respect anything except raw, brutal power."

"Sounds like Malak and the Sith have the right idea," she muttered.

My jaw dropped of its own volition, and I stared at her, shocked and incensed. "How can you even say that?" _She can't be serious, surely? Not even someone as crazy as her could really mean that? _All the colour had drained from her face, and I dimly recognized it as yet another thing she hadn't meant to say. Didn't stop my tirade, however. "The Sith are butchers! Soldiers, civilians, I mean they don't care who they kill! Even... even children!"

"I didn't mean to say that!"

"Then why did you?" I snapped. _I can't believe she would even think it! Maybe things would be better – and safer – if I was just by myself._

"I don't know," she sighed. "I guess I was just trying to hassle you again."

"Yeah, well, sometimes you go too far," I said coldly.

She started to apologise, then thought better of it and stared silently at her empty glass.

We didn't talk for the remainder of the day.

* * *

xXx

* * *


	5. Tricks of the mind

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Five – Tricks of the mind**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

_Things are just going from bad to worse, _I thought resentfully as we trudged towards the Lower City entrance. _I really pissed off Onasi last night, and now we hear the Sith are blockading all entrances to Lower Taris. _I scowled at Carth's back as he stalked ahead of me. He'd been at a loss as to how to get past the Sith, but hadn't appreciated the idea of knocking the guard out. _Spoilsport, _part of me muttered. Okay, so attacking a Sith in broad daylight may be a fairly dim-witted suggestion, but the angry side of me was just clamouring for some action – _besides, _I thought to myself, _it wasn't like Blaster Boy over there had any better ideas._

And he sure hadn't helped matters with all of his quips last night. Still, he'd made me laugh. When was the last time I'd genuinely laughed? I couldn't remember.

We'd spent the morning buying equipment from the nearby _'Adventurer's Emporium'_, which considering the empty shelves, had once seen better days. We found out about the Sith refusing citizens entrance to the lower levels from the owner, a Kebla Yurt. She also imparted to us information about the gang fighting which had erupted into the streets below. The two largest gangs were engaged in a messy war for supremacy, yet still somehow managed to repel the Sith from controlling the area. Even the Exchange had a stronger presence in the Lower City – but that wasn't really surprising. The Exchange was everywhere these days.

Personally, with the opportunities a gang war could bring – and most notably the lack of Sith presence – I wondered whether it would be safer to permanently move our hideout downwards. _If_ we could actually find a way to get there.

We'd stocked up at Kebla's, and now both carried rucksacks full of rations, medpacs, and utility tools. Unfortunately she didn't have anything too useful – like a decent tech spike or stealth belt – as the Sith came in every now and then to audit her stock. From the way the woman's mouth had curled when she explained that, I assumed they did more than just audit.

It was my third day awake on this Taris, and today – with luck – things would start happening. Despite the tension between us, both Carth and I were ready to find a way down to the Lower City and start our mission proper. Adrenaline pumped through my veins at the very thought of running into some of those gang mobs Kebla had mentioned. _I suppose losing control in battles can't be too bad, right? I seem to be winning them so far. Have I always been so reckless?_

With that thought dizziness slammed into my head like a vibro-ax, a wave of darkness surging through my senses. I stumbled against a passerby who exclaimed rudely and shoved me sideways. I felt myself falling, as if from a great distance. _Not again..._

…

_"Have you always been so reckless?" I snapped at the young man facing me. "We have no idea what's inside these tombs - other than some sort of ancient technology we don't understand - yet you're quite happy to destroy everything at first sight!"_

_"You're a fine one to talk." He scowled at me. "Mandalorian Wars ring a bell?"_

_A mix of guilt, anger and victory claimed me all at once. "I know. They're still angry with us, the whole Council. I'm still furious at them. Force, we won the war and they treat us like errant children! Like - like we did the wrong thing! How can they even think it?"_

_"Because they're old and wise, and always know best," he muttered sarcastically, turning to examine the stone wall. He brandished his lightsaber, and tried to slash at it again. "They're trying to separate us. Love is wrong. Love leads to the Dark Side. Bah!" He spat on the ground. "They took us from the only home we knew, and we could do nothing while it was destroyed! Along with countless other Rim worlds! And they dare tell us we were wrong?"_

_His rage fuelled mine, as always. We were so close that our moods often mirrored – sometimes I was sure I almost heard his thoughts. Deep down, I could perhaps understand why the Council wanted to separate us, but that didn't mean I was going to let them. He was all I had left, thanks to their inaction. And maybe here - if what we'd read gave any indication at all - we'd find something to stop any senseless slaughter occurring again._

_"Jen!" A voice called from the distance. Puzzlement set in. I ignored it._

_"You won't be able to open that door, you heard what the Guardian said," I told him._

_"No harm in trying though, is there?" He gave me a cheeky grin. His mood had always changed so quickly, so unpredictably, and I knew that had affected me._

_"Jen? Wake up!"_

_"Who is that?" I muttered, annoyed. The man facing me faded, dissolving into the shady background. My eyes felt gritty, and my vision all at once turned to bright light..._

…

"Oh," I groaned. "I told you, you won't be able to slice through the door."

"Say what?" Onasi's puzzled voice shot through my sluggish thoughts. "What's wrong with you?"

I blinked as Carth's features slowly swam into view. The faint glare of the Tarisian sun stabbed into my eyes. "Oh! I think I was dreaming. Uh, where am I?"

"In the middle of Upper Taris, giving me quite a scare," he said wryly. His eyes were warm with concern as they stared down at me. "What happened?"

"I – I think I fainted," I muttered, sitting up and clutching at my head. It was pounding with renewed force, waves of nausea washing through me. _What was that? That wasn't Jen, and it couldn't be Evil Bitch... was that the real me? Stang, I don't understand any of it._

"That was quite a faint then." Carth's expression warped to suspicion. Again. "You were muttering something about a door."

"I think I was dreaming," I replied woozily. _Interesting dream, too. My home was destroyed? What Council were they talking about? Had I been in the Mandalorian wars? And who was that boy? He had a lightsaber..._

"Give a girl a hand up, would you?" I snapped as Onasi continued to eyeball me in frowning concern. He reluctantly helped me to my feet. I noticed people staring, and glared at the crowd defensively.

"Let's get some food first," I muttered. "I probably didn't have enough to eat. Then we can go check out the Sith guard."

He nodded briskly at me, and thankfully dropped the subject.

xXx

We sat eating lunch in the cantina, another bland meal of slush.

"So," I began, "there's got to be entrances to the Lower City not guarded by the Sith."

Onasi had been watching me like a Roonish hawk since I'd fainted. I couldn't work out what was stronger – his concern or his mistrust. _The latter, of course. He wears paranoia like a second skin._

"I doubt it," he responded slowly. "They've locked this planet up tight; they're taking no chances with Bastila getting away. We need to somehow get past the Sith."

Fortunately, Bastila was still unconscious inside my head. The idea of a powerful Jedi having such access to my innermost feelings was unnerving, to say the least.

"We could always jump off one of the platforms," I muttered sarcastically.

"Oh yes, you're such great help," Carth snapped.

_I really should stop saying things like that to him. He's such a nice guy. _I scowled. _Shut up, Jen._

"Well, I don't know. We could try bribing them," I offered.

"That would possibly work, but I don't think we've got enough credits to win them over."

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. "Alright, let's just steal some Sith uniforms, and pretend we're on their side then."

He frowned at me. "Lunatic ideas I could do without."

"Got any better suggestions?" I shot back tartly.

"Why don't we just check the guard out first?"

I nodded, and pushed my plate away. "Alright, let's go."

We headed back into the Tarisian throng, this time with a full stomach. Hopefully that was enough to stop me having another spell. _Flashbacks I can do without, _I thought grimly, _it's just confusing me all the more._

Our path took us through yet another identical apartment building - this one slightly more upper-class than our own hideout. There were few people here, but as we coasted towards the exit I spotted a couple of armoured humans looming menacingly over an old man. One even held a blaster – for all that I couldn't immediately spot any Sith, I was surprised at their audacity. These were the first people I'd seen walking around in what was obviously combat armour, and I wondered if they were gang members visiting the Upper City from some reason. I doubted the old man – by the looks a poor merchant – could be the explanation, unless there were easier ways to circumnavigate the urban levels than we'd discovered so far.

"But I don't have that much!" I heard the old man cry. "How can I give you credits I don't have?"

I moved to evade the incident – more because of Onasi's continued hounding at staying inconspicuous than any real desire to. Part of me wanted to barge up to the creeps and tell them to sod off and leave the harassed man alone, where another part just wanted to join in what looked like an oncoming fight. I thought I was rather restrained ignoring both thoughts.

"That's too bad," one of the bullies responded in a sinister voice. "You brought this on yourself, you know. Davik can't afford to let you run free for no cash return. But don't worry, I promise it'll be quick."

_Ah, Davik, the Exchange boss Kebla warned me about. These guys probably paid the Sith to turn a blind eye to their operations. _If they were Exchange thugs, then it really did make sense to ignore the confrontation altogether. To my surprise, Carth tugged on my sleeve.

I raised an eyebrow at him, and he nodded sharply towards the old man.

"Look, I know we have to be careful about drawing attention to ourselves," Carth hissed, "but are we just going to let them drag this guy off?"

_Well, he doesn't need to convince me._

"No – help! Somebody help!" the man yelled, glancing around frantically. "They're going to kill me!" He spotted us, and his eyes gained the fervent glint of the desperately hopeful. The armoured thugs spotted our presence just as Carth's hand inched underneath that ghastly jacket. I really had to dispense of that garish thing sometime.

"Well, well," one of the bullies drawled as he eyed us over disparagingly, "looks like we got ourselves a witness here."

The second guy sneered. "Davik doesn't like witnesses."

I could feel a smirk forming on my face. "I don't like your attitude," I mocked. "I'd better teach you a lesson!" With the words flowing from my mouth, my hand shot underneath the dark coat and withdrew my vibroblade.

"Guess we have to teach you to mind your own business!" the first man yelled, swinging his blaster away from the merchant to point to me. Hazily I was aware of Carth edging over to the right to get a clear shot, but my mind was mostly focused on one thought: _I need more time. _The distance between me and the thugs was at least twenty metres, and they were already aiming ranged weapons at me.

_I need more time._

My muscles tensed as I began to sprint towards them, and suddenly everything around me seemed to slow down and _stretch_. The first human had already loosed a blaster shot in my direction, and I saw the laser beam coalesce towards me like a slow-motion holovid replay. I dodged to the right, just in time. It seemed an eternity until I reached the thug. He was halfway to drawing out a stun baton when I stabbed my blade into his throat. His scream ended in a drawn out gurgle. _Music to my ears. _I turned to face the other guy. _No! Killing is wrong! _He was already falling to the ground, shot fatally by Carth.

My surroundings _snapped_ back into place instantly, and I staggered as time took on its normal speed. _What happened? _Carth walked over to me, shoving his blaster back underneath his jacket. _No sign of distress on his face. It happened to me alone then... better not mention it. This is frelling nuts!_

"Wow, you're fast," Carth said in amazement. Something close to respect passed over his face, but I couldn't be sure. "Crazy, but fast!"

"Thank you – I owe you my life!" the old man started gushing in disbelief. "Those bounty hunters were going to take me away and kill me! My wife warned me not to take a loan from Davik."

My eyes shot to the merchant; he was positively shining with awe and gratitude. _You should have listened to her, then. What kind of idiot borrows credits from the Exchange and then can't pay them back?_

"Now I can't pay him back. It's not good to owe a crime lord money." _Well, duh._ "He'll just keep sending more bounty hunters after me until I'm dead!"

_I shouldn't judge him, _some part of me commented piously. _Maybe I can help._

"You already helped me by saving me from those bounty hunters!" the man continued. I blinked. _Sithspit, did I say that out loud?_ "So unless you have a spare hundred credits to give me so I can pay off Davik, there's nothing else you can do."

_We don't need credits since we're all kitted up. _"Here's a hundred credits, take them." I pulled out some chits and handed them to the man before I realized what I was doing. _Why am I throwing money away on a moron?_

"You're giving me a hundred credits? Just like that?" the man spluttered, looking at the money now nestled in his grimy paw. "I- I don't know what to say! Thank you! Thank you!"

_You can sod off now, before I decide to kill you. _I reigned in my thoughts. Carth shot me an incredulous look. _Well, maybe this will work at convincing Flyboy that I'm one of the good guys._

"Generous," Carth murmured softly to me. The old man ran off, muttering about going to pay Davik.

I nodded at Carth, not willing to let myself talk. With my mind in turmoil, I strode away from the area, not even bothering to search the corpses. _Looks like I need to control Jen as well. I gave that money away without thinking! I must be going mad. I need to get out of here – rescue Onasi's girlfriend, and then run off. Although killing Bastila might be the better option. No, that'd be suicide, _a rational voice told me. _That'd be wrong! _I grimaced. _Stop it! Just stop thinking. I'm not killing anyone unless I have to!_

I continued walking in a daze, barely comprehending my surroundings until Carth nudged me. Stopping, I turned to glance in the direction he was pointing. A turbo-lift to the Lower City.

The Sith guarding it was decked out in shiny black armour. His visor turned to face us as we warily approached.

"This elevator is off-limits," he told us stonily. "Only Sith patrols and those with the proper authorization are allowed into the Lower City."

"Where can I get authorization?" I asked, pasting on what I hoped was my most beguiling smile.

"If you were supposed to have it, you'd know where to get it!" he snapped. _Somehow I don't think flirting will work with this guy, _I thought sourly. "Now quit wasting my time and move along." The Sith flicked his hand in a dismissive wave.

_Sod it, we'll have to find another way. _"It's not like we'd cause any trouble down there," I muttered sulkily at the guard.

"I – I guess you wouldn't cause any trouble down there," the guard returned, this time in a hesitant voice.

I stared at him blankly, and remembered pazaak. _Let's just see..._

"So you can let us through," I added slowly. _This can't work, surely?_

"I can let you through," the guard echoed in a dull tone, and stepped aside.

In the periphery of my vision I saw Carth's jaw drop. _Why do people listen to me? And why do they repeat everything I say? _I shrugged, and walked over to the lift. _This just seems so surreal._

Carth followed me in swiftly as the doors closed.

"I can't believe that!" he exclaimed in shock. "The guard just listened to you!"

"Weird, isn't it?" I commented, and threw him an impish grin. "Guess he thought I was cute or something."

Carth rolled his eyes. "Even the Sith have standards. But seriously, how did you do that?"

_I don't know! _"Could you just drop it?"

"I guess I could just drop- no, no I can't. That was just too strange."

I glanced at him, and pushed the elevator button to hide my speculation. _Did that almost work on him as well?_

"I don't know why he listened to me, Onasi." I said slowly, eyeing him surreptitiously. Faint grinding noises filled my ears as the lift slowly descended. "But it's a good thing he did."

He gave me a measured look. "I've seen Jedi do mind tricks very similar. And you were onboard the Endar Spire due to a specific request by the Jedi." Carth drew in a breath and looked away before continuing. "I learnt a long time ago that something which looks like a coincidence probably isn't. Especially when the Jedi are involved."

"What, you think they taught me some Force tricks?" I snapped. _He really doesn't give up, does he? He may be right... but if I knew how to use the Force properly then I'd make him think he was a gizka. That, or a pleasure slave. _I smiled to myself, amused at the mental picture that brought up, but wiped the grin off my face when he quirked an eyebrow at me.

"I don't know..." he trailed off. "But a lot of things about you just don't add up. The fact that you survived the crash, for starters."

I stared at him blankly. _Isn't that just as odd as him surviving? _"You'd rather I hadn't?"

"Don't be ridiculous," he shot back. "It just seems odd that someone Bastila's party specifically requested to transfer aboard happened to survive."

_What is he saying? _I could feel a bubble of anger start to surface.

The doors opened, and I walked out. We'd exited into a dirty corridor, with rubble and waste littering the corners, but my mind wasn't really on the décor.

"Are you implying I had something to do with the crash?" I hissed at him.

"No!" he answered quickly, but then mumbled under his breath. "Well... maybe."

"Oh thanks!" I yelled at him. My muscles clenched, and I could feel the all too familiar fury taking hold again. _Must calm down. _I gritted my teeth, and forced in a deep breath. "It doesn't make any difference. Go ahead and be paranoid."

"I'm not trying to be paranoid!" he snapped, and I could see the anger crease his face also. _He's getting just as wound up as me. _Some faint shouts drifted from around the corner, but the noise barely registered.

I glared furiously at him, and Carth glowered back, dark eyes flashing irritation at me. With a concerted effort to restrain himself, he opened his mouth once more. "Look," he finished softly, "I'm probably wrong, and this is probably nothing, I know. But I learned a long time ago not to take anything at face value. And I hate surprises."

The shouts became louder, and now grabbed my attention. _Sounds like blaster fire. If we're running into gang fights already, then Kebla wasn't exaggerating. _Carth whipped around in the direction of the noise, then turned back to glance at me. We nodded briskly at each other, argument forgotten, and both withdrew weapons before slowly edging down the corridor. As we rounded the corner, I spotted three aliens standing over a pile of corpses.

One of them looked up. "(More strangers!)" he hissed in a foreign dialect.

I was taken aback. _I understood that. I have no idea what language he just spoke, but I understood that._

Onasi opened fire, and I raced towards them, holding my vibroblade firmly. The same battle rage once more consumed me, expanding through my body in a blazing heat as I lost control of my senses. The gang members surrounded me, each with stun sticks and blades, and I could dimly hear Carth shouting at me to get out of the fray. I dodged the first swipe, and hurled my blade towards a neck, but the guy stepped backwards. The alien on my left snarled, and jabbed a blade towards me. I jumped forward just in time, knocking the first gang member down with my sword.

I felt a piercing pain glance my shoulder, and numbly realized the third creep had pulled a blaster on me.

"Jen, get out of there!" Carth yelled.

_I'm not going down to this scum! _Thoughts raged through my head. _These imbeciles should be afraid of **me!**_ An unbidden sense of power surged through me, uncontrolled. Two of the gang members instantly gave out synchronized yelps, dropped their weapons, and ran. A sense of shock assailed my fury, but battle sense prevailed and I turned to face the third guy. _He looks as confused as me._ Nonplussed, he stood stock still as Onasi shot him in the side. He crumpled.

"How odd," Carth said as he walked closer. "Why did they just run off like that?"

"Beats me," I said distantly, wondering myself. _Am I using the Force without realizing it? I guess I can't let this power worry me too much, it seems to save my neck, _the rational side of me pointed out. _And it's so much fun, _a darker side added. _Not if I can't control it!_

Carth shook his head in guarded disbelief. "Your luck is amazing, Jen. I was certain that was your end. Look, your battle sense is non-existent, and it's driving me crazy with worry every time we get into trouble. Could you please not run into the middle of fights like that?"

"I'll try," I muttered, kneeling down next to the gang member and searching him efficiently. The corpse held nothing of use – I didn't need a stun stick and the blaster was one of those hundred cred Czerka models that were guaranteed to overheat in the middle of a firefight. I stood up in disgust.

"Frankly, I don't understand why you're still standing." Carth was still frowning at me.

_Because I'm good, you idiot. _"Neither do I, really," I appeased.

Carth straightened and dusted himself off. "Well we're not hurt, so let's find out how to get to the Undercity."

I nodded, and we proceeded further down the large walkway.

As we walked in silence, both listening intently for any sounds of further battle, I became aware of a foreign consciousness returning to my thoughts. _Great, the brat is waking. _I could sense a drowsy frustration claw at her.

_**I will not be silenced again!** _

I stumbled in surprise. _That wasn't my thought, was it? _A sense of shock echoed mine, and Bastila's presence focused on me, like it had done back on the Endar Spire. I felt the familiar taste of fear and confusion, and tried to back off mentally. Obviously something else caught the Jedi's attention, as the focus seemed to dissipate somewhat. _But she's awake now. _A chill prickled down my spine._ I can't afford to lose my temper again._

Carth was looking at me expectantly, and I realized he'd said something.

"Sorry – what?"

"I said, do you want to try this cantina for some info, first?"

I glanced up ahead, and spotted a lurid neon sign brightly proclaiming 'Javyar's Cantina' to all and sundry. It looked somehow out of place in this dark corridor. "Sure."

"Good, you can try your hand at pazaak again." He grinned at me.

I felt a little uneasy at the thought. _But hey, the same trick worked yesterday._

We nodded briefly to the bouncer, and walked inside. Apart from being dirtier and having scruffier patrons, the cantina looked a lot like the one on the Upper City. _Obviously the same architect. _

An archway to the left opened out into a smaller room filled with pazaak players, and Carth nudged me expectantly.

"A drink, first." I replied.

He glared at me. "No drinkin-"

"Just one, I promise," I laughed at him, and turned back to the bar that graced the centre of the cantina. Behind the bar I spotted three gang members walking towards a mercenary, in that forced casual stroll that just screams violence to any experienced eye. They wore scuffed red armour slashed with black, the same colours as the aliens we encountered earlier. _My, the action is certainly thick and fast down here, isn't it?_

"Go away," the mercenary said loudly. He wore strange exotic clothes, but it was obvious he was heavily equipped. By his stance alone, he seemed a worthy fighter.

"Hey, you not talk like that!" one of the mooks – a Rodian - said jovially, in broken Basic. "We just want say hi to big, bad bounty hunter Calo Nord!"

"Nah, this can't be Calo Nord," a human piped up from behind the Rodian. "He's supposed to be tough. This guy's nothing but a runt!"

I smirked at the ensuing confrontation. _They're just asking for trouble. _I could almost sense Carth tensing as he recognized danger. You only had to look at this Calo Nord to realize he was not someone to taunt lightly.

"One," Calo Nord said ominously.

"One? What that mean? You be funny, tough guy?" _Oh, so they're stupid as well._

"Two."

"Me no understand." The Rodian shrugged. "One? Two? Why he count? He trying to count how many of us against him?"

"It's three against one, Calo," the human sneered. "What do you think about those odds?"

"Three," Calo finished, and whipped out a grenade. I instinctively pulled myself back into the pazaak room as the bright flash went off. I heard blaster shots, and as the smoke cleared I saw the mercenary step over the corpses on his way out. I sniggered.

Carth shot me a disgusted look. "Did you just find that funny?" he demanded.

"No." _Yes._

"Really? I heard you laugh," he said in a sarcastic tone.

"I didn't laugh!" _I sniggered._

"It sounded like a laugh to me."

_No, that was just my general snigger. My laugh goes more along the lines of mwahahahah._

"I had something in my throat, okay?" I snapped.

"Right," he said coldly.

Suddenly I didn't feel like a drink anymore. "Let me just go and play some pazaak. Give me your credits."

"You sound just like one of Davik's thugs when you say that," he growled, but handed over his money anyway. In total, we had just over two hundred credits left. _Enough to earn me a small fortune._

xXx

I couldn't believe it. I simply couldn't understand. _What's changed? Why didn't that work? _My mind was screaming.

"You- you lost **all** our credits?" Carth looked flabbergasted. "How? You won everything in Upper Taris!"

"I guess luck just wasn't with me!" I snapped back.

"Then why didn't you cut your losses? You lost over two hundred credits!"

"I tried, alright?" I scowled. _Gelrood just laughed at me when I suggested he stand with 13. Why? Why? The second player I tried just told me to stop acting like a juiced-up spacer! Have I been using the Force, or not? If so, why has it suddenly failed me?_

"So we're totally broke, great going Jen." Carth obviously felt he needed to make me feel even worse.

"Not totally," I shot back at him sweetly. "I have just enough left for a firewhiskey, so excuse me."

I stormed off in the direction of the bartender.

* * *

xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Snackfiend101 & Anonymous - Yeah I'm being a bit hard on poor Rev, aren't I? I'll make it a bit more manageable for her in future, but right now I'm having fun..._

_Prisoner 24601 - Thanks... hehe yeah I enjoyed calling him that!_


	6. Restless

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

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**Chapter Six – Restless**

_- Mission Vao -_

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I was getting restless again; I could feel it in my bones. The desire to go out and explore, to meet new people, to have an adventure - was beginning to consume me. It didn't help that Gadon refused to let me join in on any of the Hidden Bek assignments. _I could help them, I really could! Why do they always treat me like a kid?_

Big Z would say it's 'cause I was a kid, but he was the only one who could get away with that. Although I did throw my dinner at him last time.

"(Mission, you're fidgeting like a lice-ridden cub,)" he suddenly complained.

I looked up from the spare stealth belt I'd been tweaking. I always liked to carry two.

"Let's go explore the Undercity again!" The thought had only just crossed my mind as it erupted out of my mouth.

"(No!)" he exploded in a fierce growl. "(It's too dangerous. Listen to Gadon!)"

I had to laugh. _How many times have we been down there with no trouble? _"Come on, it's not like we can't avoid the rakghouls! 'Sides, I wanna check out those escape pods!" I grinned hopefully at him. "There could be some really cool stuff down there!"

Just thinking about it stirred excitement in my belly. _We might find some Republic gear! Think of the creds that would bring us!_

"(There are Sith patrols down there, Mission!)" he scolded sternly. It was surprising how strongly he could convey disapproval when howling in his native tongue.

"Bah, they won't bother us," I waved a hand dismissively.

"(No, I'm not going,)" he said firmly.

I gave him an affectionate look. "Yes, you are!"

"(Mission,)" he whined, "(you are too impulsive for your own good. Let us just stay here.)"

"No way!" I retorted, shaking my head in denial. "Live a little, Big Z! Come on, it's boring round here!"

"(What are you up to now, Mission?)" A female voice said in Twi'leki. I glanced up to see Zaerdra, Gadon's personal bodyguard, enter the Bek storeroom we were seated in. Zaerdra insisted in speaking purely Twi'leki to me - as if I was gonna lose my heritage or something if I didn't hear it daily. I enjoyed ribbing her by always answering back in Basic.

"Nothing, just talking 'bout our next adventure," I answered chirpily, hoping she'd drop it.

Zaerdra pinned me with a glare. "(What adventure? Really, Mission, there's a gang war going on at the moment. You need to stay put, grow up and have a little more care.)"

"Grow up?" the cry was ripped from my lungs as I jumped to my feet. _She's always mothering me – as if I need it! _While gang fighting _had_ erupted into the tunnels and alleyways of the Lower City – ever since the Sith took over Upper Taris – it didn't mean I couldn't evade all the action if need be. "I take care of myself perfectly fine, and always have! Why do you always treat me like a little girl?"

"(Because you)-" Zaerdra pursed her lips, sighed, and then began again. "(You are still young, and spontaneous, and I worry you put yourself in danger. Especially with all the Vulkars out there right now.)"

"(Mission can take care of herself,)" Big Z growled in Shyriiwook. _Good old Zaalbar. He may lecture me to death when we're alone, but he'll always stick up for me. Sometimes I reckon I can't count on anyone else._

"Well don't worry," I said firmly, crossing my arms. "I know the Undercity better than any Bek alive!"

"(The Undercity? Oh Mission, you're not going there again?)" Zaerdra frowned, her brightly waxed lekku twitching in disapproval. She sniffed. "(Gadon will talk some sense into you.)"

"Look, Zaerdra, if Gadon doesn't want me along on Bek jobs, then that's fine. I'll just occupy myself." I tried to say that in a snooty voice, but considering Zaerdra's scowl I didn't think it worked. "Let's go, Big Z."

The Wookiee faithfully followed me out of the Hidden Bek base. I grinned and waved to some of the members, but still felt a little annoyed. _I could help the Beks – I'm the best splicer they've got - why does Gadon still coddle me?_ Big Z had tried to tell me it was 'cause they cared, and 'cause Zaerdra thought she was looking out for me, but I didn't buy that. _No one's looked out for me since Griff left, and I've been fine!_ But I didn't want to think of Griff. Better to contemplate finding all sorts of exotic Republic gear we could flog off to the rest of the Beks.

"(Can we get something to eat first, Mission?)" Zaalbar complained as we wandered down a shadowy back alley. There was a convenient shortcut between the Bek base and the cantina, and sometimes I wondered at how those brainless Vulkar oafs had never found Gadon's hideout.

"You and your stomach!" I poked him in the fur, and made a mental note to nag Zaalbar into having a bath. "It's a good thing I can bring in the creds, Big Z, with the way you eat!"

He growled at my teasing, and I laughed again. "Alright, let's go get some cantina grub. I might play a bit of pazaak while I'm there."

I recalled the Rodians who'd been there last night, eager to play me but I'd had to dash. _They want to play the pazaak queen of the Lower City – I'm going to have some fun kicking their scrawny green butts! _It'd taken me years to build up this deck, and I was rather proud of it.

I skipped along the corridor in anticipation, with Zaalbar trudging behind me. A flickering neon light announced the cantina, and I stopped to chat briefly to the bouncer, who all but ignored Zaalbar. Big Z tended to be quiet in other company, and it always amazed me how easily people could forget he was even there. _Except when he gets angry! Hard to ignore a seven-foot growling shag carpet!_

I waltzed into the cantina and waved cheerily at Sancha, the barman. Glancing around the place, my eyes lit up on a napping patron. A Twi'lek dressed in Vulkar colours, slumped unconscious on the beer-stained bar. _Someone's had a few too many drinks... oooh this could be fun._

The Black Vulkar was alone and unmoving. Sancha gave me a warning look as I approached, but turned to hide a grin. He knew me well, and wasn't the biggest fan of the Vulkars. They'd trashed his place three times in the last month – despite the unwritten code of the Lower City. _Leave the gang war on the streets. _

Zaalbar nudged me. "(Mission, what are you doing?)"

"Big Z, shush!" I whispered. "Go eat something. Your breath stinks."

"(You are getting into trouble again. I cannot let you walk into danger.)"

I rolled my eyes at him, pushed him softly away, and hopped onto the stool next to the Black Vulkar. The thug didn't move; still head-planted on the bar. _What sort of trouble could an unconscious punk bring anyway? _I leaned nonchalantly against the Twi'lek. I heard a soft snort, but other than that he stayed motionless. My wandering hand strayed into his pocket. _My, I wonder what this stack of chits could be._

I grinned to myself and jumped off the stool, wandering around the other side of the bar. Zaalbar was shooting me worried looks. "Sancha, dinner for my friend please," I asked cheerily.

"(Mission...)" Zaalbar moaned. I grinned impishly at him, and motioned to a free table in the corner.

"Easy money," I said happily, flicking through the wad of plasteel credits. There was a crumpled piece of paper stuck between two of them. I looked at it curiously.

"Bit odd to have something on paper. It looks like codes of some sort," I commented, tracing a finger down it. "What do you make of it, Big Z?"

"(I don't!)" he wailed when I showed him the writing.

I shot him an exasperated look, and glanced at the paper again. There was a Vulkar insignia hastily scribbled on the top, with the phrase 'BlackAccess01' written underneath it. _Some sort of password? _I mused, wondering. Further down the page were the hexadecimal codes I'd first noticed.

An idea hit me – only last week had I stumbled across a system I couldn't crack. And Gadon'd said he thought the Vulkars had hidden their base in the same place. "Hey! Big Z, d'ya reckon this could have something to do with that security system in the sewers?"

Zaalbar groaned audibly as I felt anticipation swell once more through my stomach. My eyes roved hungrily over the page again, but I had the sense to lower my voice. "I reckon it is. I bet 'blackaccess01' is the passphrase to login, which means the codes could be..." I trailed off, my eyes shining. "The deactivation sequence to that forcefield we saw! Stuff the escape pods, let's go check it out! If this," I shook the bit of paper to stress my point, "is the key to breaking into the Vulkars' base, then we should make sure it works!"

"(No! Too dangerous! No! I will not allow you to run into a heavily guarded base if I have to tie you up myself!)" Zaalbar yelled angrily.

_Well, it's a good thing no one round here can understand Shyriiwook. _"Geez, Big Z, calm down would ya? You sound like a wampa in heat! 'Sides," I whispered, "I'm not crazy enough to break into their base. I just want to see if I'm right."

"(No! We will not go!)"

"Calm your friend down, would you? He's scaring the customers." Sancha warned as he strolled over, Zaalbar's dinner resting on a tray clasped in his hand.

I grinned apologetically at him. "He's just hungry, is all. Saying how he can't wait for your food!"

Sancha gave me a disbelieving look as he handed Zaalbar his food – your typical Lower City cuisine of rehydrated gima beans and cast-off meat from the Upper City – but strolled away without further comment.

"(Mission, I will go with you to the escape pods, if you promise we will not go into the sewers,)" Zaalbar offered hopefully. I beamed at him. _Once I've got him down there, it'll be easy enough to drag him into the sewers._

"It's a deal!" I said gaily, and stood up. "Now I'm off to make some more creds." I patted his shoulder reassuringly as I waltzed off to the card room.

The pazaak den was adjoined to the main bar under a large archway, and occupied with the usual assortment of drunks, lowlifes, and anyone looking to make a quick buck. Which pretty much included every inhabitant in the Lower City. I liked it here though; most people were too busy looking out for themselves to hassle me for being so young.

Lina, a human female who frequented the pazaak den more often than me, spotted my entrance and wandered over to embrace me affectionately. She was a bit of a spice junkie, and more often than not I'd see that awful glazed look on her face as she rode out another high. Today she appeared crisp and coherent, and smelt only of watered-down beer.

"Mission, come to wipe the floor with those Rodian jerks?" she grinned, hugging me warmly.

I nodded enthusiastically as I stepped back, glancing around the room. Gelrood was holed up in his standard corner - looking more smug than usual - and the Rodians were playing at the end table.

"You just missed out on an easy catch," Lina told me.

My eyes shot back to her. "Lemme guess, Gelrood thrashed someone? He's looking happier than normal... did he cheat, d'ya think?"

Lina let out a tinkle of laughter. "Not this time. Some crazy new woman kept losing to him. Kept telling him to stand, or keep going when he was on nineteen."

"Threats?" I raised both eyebrows. Not too uncommon an occurrence, but usually from the Vulkars. Which was why most of us refused to play them.

"No, no," Lina giggled, her dull eyes twinkling with mirth. "I was listening to most of it. I don't think she understood how to play the game properly. It sounded like she was making suggestions. Gelrood's certainly richer, though!"

I grinned, wishing I'd been there. You got all sorts in Javyar's cantina, and I personally bet it was some Upper City brat who'd been forced out by the Sith. "Shame I missed out! Anyways, I'm off to try the new guys."

Lina nodded in farewell, and I made my way over to the end table. One of the Rodians looked up as I approached, his large black eyes narrowing in recognition.

"(Hey look, a little girl wants to try a grown up game,)" he sneered in Rodese. The other two spotted me next, stopping their game to eye me over.

"Hey, I'm not a little girl, ronto breath!" I glared at them. "Are you afraid to play me? You said last night you wanted to play the champion."

"(This place is easy credits if the champion's just a little girl,)" a second one chimed in, nudging the first. I was starting to get annoyed - but I knew just how much psychology factored in with pazaak. Besides, if my deck didn't treat me well tonight, I'd just cheat to win.

"Maybe you should stop talking, and start playing. Or are you scared?" I challenged.

"(Let's see how many credits you have to lose.)"

xXx

A short time later, and I walked out of the card room smugly, my purse a little heavier. I'd lost a few games to those smart mouths, but won more. _My lucky deck never fails me. _Well, it didn't tonight.

"(Little girl cheats! Little girl's asking for trouble!)" The slurring voice of the Rodian I'd just beaten drifted after me into the main bar.

I whirled around, glaring through the archway back into the pazaak den. "I do not cheat, gizka brain! Face it, I won fair and square, you sore loser! Now, beat it."

I stalked over to the bar, my eyes narrowed in annoyance. _Would people stop with the age thing already?_ I wondered briefly where Big Z was, he must have had four dinners by now.

"(Hey, little girl! You better give our money back. We don't like cheats,)" one of the mouthy runts taunted, dogging my heels. I glanced back to see two of the Rodians had followed me out, their beady eyes intent on me.

"I told you to leave me alone – so give me some space, bug-eye!" I retorted. _These guys just can't handle losing. _"Your breath smells like bantha poo-doo!"

"(This ain't no place for a little girl like you. If you're smart, you'll run away home.)" The closest Rodian pointed a finger at me.

_Do they think they can intimidate me? Hah! I've seen scarier Twi'lek dancers. _"Who you calling a little girl, chuba-face?" I countered, folding my arms and staring daggers at them.

"(Looks like someone needs a lesson in manners!)" the second Rodian threatened, stepping up level with his friend.

I saw a large shadow loom behind the Rodians, and stifled a satisfied smirk. "And I suppose you creeps are going to give me one? Gimme a break!" I goaded.

Both of them took a challenging step closer. _As if I'm going to back down! _"What?" I struck a pose. "You want to beat up on little ole me?"

"(You asked for it!)" The first exclaimed angrily, flexing his arm. At once they were both lifted three feet into the air, and I watched happily as their expression turned from rage, to shock, and then finally fear.

"(You want a fight? Then have one with me!)" Zaalbar roared, and shook them both by the scruff of their necks. _What a sight! Two annoying insects totally outclassed! _The Rodians yelped in surprise, and Zaalbar growled a second time before throwing them savagely. One of them let out a high pitched squeal as he thudded against the cantina wall.

"Who's the girl now?" I taunted.

"(Little girl's lucky she has a big friend,)" the larger of the two muttered as he got to his feet. Zaalbar snarled, and the two Rodians all but sprinted out of the cantina. I poked my tongue out as they passed.

When I looked back to the bar, I saw Sancha was scowling at us. I winked gleefully, and my eyes caught on a human female laughing uproariously at the exchange. She must've understood Rodese if she was laughing, and you didn't need to speak Shryiiwook to comprehend an angry Wookiee snarling at you. I grinned impishly at her and sidled closer, curious.

_Another stranger. First the Rodians, now this human and her sidekick. _An older human was standing a bit behind her, scowling at her back. _Her angry sidekick, by the looks. Huh, I wonder what they're doing in here._

"Say, I don't recognize you and I know pretty much everyone in the Lower City. You must be new down here," I said brightly, smiling at them. "I guess that makes me and Big Z your official welcoming committee!"

The woman grinned in response, and inclined her head. Her green eyes seemed to sparkle with mischief, and I took an immediate liking to her. I saw Zaalbar lose interest, and turn back to his food.

"Hi, my name's Jen," the human told me.

I pointed to the irritated old man standing behind her. "Is that guy with you, or does he just like glaring at random people?"

She giggled at me. "That's Carth. I seem to have a habit of annoying him."

The man named Carth hissed something I didn't hear, his face a picture of heightened irritation.

"What?" She shot him a puzzled look. "You're paranoid, you know that?"

"Anyway," I chimed in, not wanting to witness an argument between the two. "My name's Mission Vao and that big Wookiee over there is my best friend, Zaalbar. I'd offer to give you a tour, but the streets down here aren't safe - what with the gangs and the Sith these days."

"You showed a lot of guts dealing with those bullies, kid," the older man commented. He was probably trying to be polite, but I bristled at the word. Jen looked at me – I wondered if she sensed my irritation, for she quickly spoke again.

"How do a Wookiee and a Twi'lek end up as best friends?" she asked curiously.

I relaxed, warming up to the subject. "We just kind of fell in together. It ain't easy on your own here in the Lower City - everyone's always looking to get the best of you."

Carth cut in again. "So we noticed. Still, you seem like an odd pair."

"When I met up with Zaalbar it seemed like a good match," I volunteered. "I knew we could look out for each other. With my street smarts and his muscle, we make a great team." _I couldn't ask for a better friend. _

The humans nodded at me, and I wondered again what they were doing here. Apart from Lina, not many of their type often frequented this cantina. I suddenly recalled Lina's earlier comments, and wondered.

"Say, you don't want to play a game of pazaak, do ya?" I asked brightly.

"No she does not," Carth said quickly through clenched teeth. Jen's face flushed red, and I had to suppress a giggle. _So it **was** her._

"I'd like to ask you some questions," Jen said in a rush.

_I suppose I could let her change the subject. _"Well, you came to the right person!" I told her. "If you want info on Lower Taris, I'm the one to talk to! Davik, the Lower City gangs... I've even got the scoop on that bounty hunter Calo Nord!"

She gave me a considering look. "Calo Nord? He's the fellow I saw earlier. What do you know about him?"

"Calo Nord's one of the most famous bounty hunters in the galaxy!" I enthused. "He's killed more people than the Iridian Plague! I've seen him kill people just for looking sideways at him!" He was pretty scary; I sure as heck didn't try talking to him. "He hangs around Zax's bounty office, but I don't think he's looking for work there. I reckon Calo's been hired by Davik to do a special job for the Exchange. I'd wager a thousand credits that as soon as the quarantine ends, he'll be getting off this rock."

"A thousand big ones – that's some amount," Jen murmured. Carth scowled angrily at the mention of credits, and I grinned. _I reckon they're flat broke now_. _You gotta be some sort of head-case to lose that much to Gelrood._

"Well," Jen continued. "I'm mostly interested in finding a way down to the Undercity."

_Ooh, I bet she's going down because of the escape pods! I'm almost tempted to join up with them... but I work better alone. Alone with Zaalbar, anyway. _"You'll have a tough time getting past the Sith guard," I warned. "They don't have the manpower to control the streets down here, but they've set up an outpost next to the Undercity entrance. You could sneak 'round them using a stealth belt, though I wouldn't recommend it. They'd probably see the lift being used." I knew a few other ways around the guards, but they were my secrets alone. "Why d'ya want to go down there, anyway? The rakghouls attack anything on sight!"

"Just want to check out a few things," she responded noncommittally.

I let out a grin. _Yep, definitely going after the escape pods. _"Well, good luck getting there. If you need help, have a chat to Gadon Thek – he's the leader of the Hidden Beks."

"I don't know if we want to get involved with the gang wars," the old man said slowly.

"Gadon's a good guy!" I jumped in quickly. "And a great leader! This gang war is totally the Vulkars fault! They're the ones who started killing everything on the streets – just 'cause of the Sith trying to wrest control. Between those two, everyone's gone insane out there."

"Sounds a good reason to stay out of it then," Jen commented dryly.

"Well, maybe," I conceded, shrugging. "But I don't reckon you'll be able to get to the Undercity without Gadon's help."

Gadon always liked to check out strangers himself, and he usually helped the good ones... if they helped him, of course._ He'd want to meet these two. _Both of them looked pretty tough, and despite their wish to stay out of the gang wars, I knew that was easier said then done. The Vulkars would even attack me on sight, these days. _Except in the cantina, of course - that's off-limits. Usually. _The Vulkar I'd looted earlier was still passed out on the bar. _Well, he was asking for it._

"This dive is boring," I complained. "I'm going to go find some action. Nice to meet you, Jen."

"And you," she smiled at me. I grinned back. _I've got some creds, Big Z's been fed - it's time to hit the streets._

"Come on, Big Z!" I called out to the corner where Zaalbar was onto his fifth meal. "Let's get going."

He complained, but followed me loyally to the door.

_Time for an adventure!_

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xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Darth Jenrai - glad you like it:)_

_Brynn - I'm not entirely sure where/if any romance is going to go yet, but I'll try not to make it too cliché._

_Mats Forsen - Heheh thanks, I'm having fun writing it :)_


	7. Control

**_Disclaimer: See chapter one._**

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**Chapter Seven – Control**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

The Twi'lek girl was right; the Sith were vigilantly guarding the Undercity entrance. Carth suggested snidely that I talk them into letting us past, but I put that down to bad temper and ignored him. _Pazaak didn't work_..._ I'm won't risk angering the Sith. Besides, maybe we should try talking to Gadon first; Mission was fairly insistent._

She seemed like a sweet kid, although I wouldn't call her that out loud. _Unlike flyboy - great tact there. _Bright, impulsive, good-natured... _she reminds me of someone. I don't know who_..._ maybe she reminds me of what I'd like to be. _I blinked, surprised at my own train of thought. _No, there was something a bit naïve and enthusiastic about her. She'd probably save bunny rabbits, too,_ I thought sourly.

"So, not interested in chatting up the Sith?" Carth queried, his voice sarcastic. He was still pissed at our lack of credits, but his mood was becoming more than a little tiresome. I wondered if he was deliberately trying to get a rise out of me. _I will be Jen; he will not make me lose control. _But – loathe as I was to admit it – Carth did have a valid reason to be angry. Our dire money situation was an issue; I'd probably have to sell the stims I'd been hiding so we could actually eat for the next few days.

"I think we should speak to Gadon," I said in a measured tone. "Mission's suggestion sounds like our only option, and we may get some information."

Carth muttered something under his breath, but I ignored it and strode back to the cantina.

Fortunately getting directions to the gang base wasn't difficult – obviously the Beks were used to visitors. A quick walk from the cantina – on one of the main pipelines through the Lower City – and a guarded entrance to the Hidden Bek base came clearly into view. I briefly wondered what genius had given the gang their name.

The guard seemed an easy target - poorly armed, but quick to block my way as I tried the door – an old-fashioned, swinging door made from thick durasteel, and likely bolted from the inside seeing as I couldn't budge it at all.

"Hey, you can't just walk in here!" the guard yelled indignantly, shoving me away from the resistant door. A flash of fury in my gut; I clenched my teeth and pushed it away. _Calm down, she's just doing her job. _I swear I could see Carth smirk behind me.

"I want to talk to Gadon Thek," I said, struggling to keep my tone pleasant and non-threatening.

"And how do I know you're not a Vulkar spy sent to kill him?" the guard sneered, her face twisting in dislike as she eyed me over.

"Uh, well, you don't?" I offered without thinking. Her expression darkened.

"Look," I appeased, "I'm not a Vulkar. I just want to get into the Undercity. Mission suggested I talk to Gadon."

She was still glaring at me in distrust. "Mission Vao? Well, I suppose it's not like you can do anything to harm Gadon in the heart of his own base. Not with Zaerdra watching his back." She paused for a minute, her lips twisting as she thought it over. "Go in and speak to Gadon if you want. Just remember to be on your best behavior... the Hidden Beks are watching you."

_She has no right to talk down to me like that! _My thoughts tumbled over one another, rage and logic vying for dominance. _No - I need their help. Anger will do no good here._

The guard knocked loudly on the door, and a small panel slid open in the centre. I could just make out a shadowy face stare at us from behind a pane of grimy ferracrystal.

"Strangers," she called. "Claim they want to see Gadon about the Undercity."

A grating noise indicated the bolting mechanism was being dismantled, and a minute later the door opened. Considering the lax security – we hadn't even been searched! – I was becoming more and more surprised that the Sith hadn't conquered these Lower City gangs. Carth shot me a disbelieving glance; he was thinking along the same lines then. _I guess the Sith are just as incompetent on Taris as everywhere else in the known galaxy. These gangs are ripe for the taking. _The Sith? Incompetent? Why would I think that? I tried to chase down the origin of the thought, but it slipped away into the shadows, another secret locked in the recesses of my unstable mind.

_Don't just stand there like you've swallowed a bothan stunner, idiot. _The guard was getting suspicious at my pause; her brows had lowered into a full-fledged glare as I stalled in the entrance, wearing a glazed look like a stim junkie. Carth nudged me towards the open door, shooting me a concerned look.

I shook my head to clear out the cobwebs, nodded curtly to the glowering guard, and strode confidently into the Bek base.

The main hall of the base was rather large, and armoured gang members lurked against the walls, eyeing me suspiciously as I walked through. A few of them stroked their displayed weapons deliberately as I caught their eye. _Gang members and their egos. As if a bunch of poorly dressed thugs with vibroblades would intimidate me. _But most of them were content to size us up from a distance – apart from a Twi'lek female stalking purposefully towards us, her eyes shooting daggers and her stride that of a competent fighter.

"Hold it right there - who are you and what is your business with Gadon?" she demanded, hands on hips as she blocked my way. My hand twitched towards my vibroblade instinctively. The woman's eyes widened as she caught my move and she snarled, drawing out her weapon in a flash. _Damn my gut reactions!_

"Spies!" she yelled, and a chorus of gang members bellowed in response. The noise of multiple blades being drawn rang through the hall, and fleetingly I hoped none would pull out blasters. _Stop this, before I get hurt! _My hand held the hilt of my vibroblade tightly, but sense stopped me from lifting it. _Before _I _get hurt? This ragtag mob is no match for my powers!_

"We're not here to fight!" Carth called desperately next to me.

"Everybody stop!" An authoritative voice shouted above the din. All around us Hidden Beks stood watching warily, blades – and blasters, I noted – aimed directly at us. All because of my gut reaction to that Twi'lek's hostility, _I hope Carth didn't see that – or I'll never hear the end of it. If we get out of here alive, that is. _My eyes flicked around the large hall; perhaps twenty gang members surrounding us, and at least five had blasters.

…_I really need to work on my instincts._

The man who'd called a temporary halt to the proceedings was strolling casually towards us. He was human, I noted in surprise – the only human Bek in the room. I wondered if he was their illustrious leader – his authority coupled with his nonchalant stance seemed to suggest so.

"They're spies, Gadon, sent by the Vulkars!" the Twi'lek insisted, eyes glaring hatefully into mine. _Say something, before this Gadon loses control of his troops again._

"No, Mission suggested we come talk to Gadon," I said in a rush.

"Lies!" the woman hissed, "I saw you go for your weapon!" She raised her vibroblade higher, pointing it threateningly at me. I swallowed down the urge to fight back against her challenge; to slash open her throat and end her defiance. _I will not lose control. Not here, otherwise I may as well just sodding shoot myself. _

"Calm down, Zaerdra." Gadon said in a soothing voice. "If Mission sent them here, I doubt very much they'd be looking to attack me. It would be a suicide attempt, at any rate."

"Gadon, you're too trusting! I saw that sneak-"

"Zaerdra," he cut in warningly.

She glared hatefully at me and stood down, but did not sheathe her weapon. I felt the eyes of everyone on us, ready for one false move. _If I ever needed to control Evil Bitch, it would be right now. _Carth stood in a defensive posture next to me, his eyes flicking from person to person.

"Now, what did you two want?" Gadon asked in a friendly tone, as if I didn't have twenty blasters aimed at my head.

"We're looking for a way to get into the Undercity," I replied blandly. His eyes bored into mine inquiringly, and I noticed their strange violet colour. _Occular implants?_

"And Mission sent you to see us?" he questioned. "Why do you want to go there?"

I hesitated. _May as well tell the truth - I can't think of anything believable to invent. _"I want to check out the escape pods."

Gadon started at my forthrightness, and then looked over me consideringly. "Well," he said in a lower tone, too soft for anyone bar us and Zaerdra to hear. "You're not Vulkars, and you don't look like Sith. If you were working for Davik, I'd expect you to find your own way to the Undercity. You're with the Republic, aren't you?"

_No. _Carth's face tightened in discomfort. "We're looking for someone," I hedged. Carth turned to glower at me, and I realized belatedly that perhaps I wasn't being as evasive as I'd hoped. Gadon had a little smile on his face.

"Well, I don't mind telling you what I've learnt. The Vulkars stripped the pods clean some time ago, and I know for a fact they took a Republic Officer captive."

"Who?" Carth demanded loudly. Gadon shot him a startled look.

"Relax, Onasi," I scowled at him. I'd only just gotten myself under control.

"What's the name of this person you're looking for?" Gadon replied. _Thinks he's got the upper hand, does he? _My eyes scanned the room. _Oh right, he does._

"A woman called Bastila," I muttered.

"Jen!" Carth hissed. His face turned red with fury. "What are you doing?"

"Calm down, flyboy. It's our only current option." I rolled my eyes at him, but from his expression I knew there would be words later.

Gadon chuckled. "I had to see some trust before I went further."

"I don't trust anyone," Carth said flatly.

Gadon's eyebrows lowered dangerously.

_And here I thought I was the one who made things worse. _"Don't pay any attention to him; he's just my version of Zaerdra." I appeased. I heard a low noise from Carth. _Be quiet, flyboy!_ Zaerdra hissed, a new level of malice crossing her face. Somehow I didn't think Zaerdra would ever be a friend of mine.

_Oh well, sod it all. _"Anyway, Gadon, can you help us?"

"Perhaps we can help each other," Gadon offered. I inclined my head in curiosity, and he continued. "Ever ridden a swoop before?"

I blinked. _Have I? _"Uh, once or twice," I bluffed. "Why?"

"Bastila is the officer Brejik – and his Vulkars – captured. He's offered her up as prize for the annual swoop race in a week's time," Gadon continued.

"Prize?" Carth said in a sort of squeak. _Heh, no wonder she's always sedated. I can't imagine spoilt little Jedi girl standing for any of that. _Though she had been awake the last few hours, and very, very angry.

"The only chance you have of getting Bastila back is winning the annual swoop race."

"That sounds like a bit of a long shot," I said dryly. "But hey, I'll give it a go. What's the catch?" _What does he want?_

"To enter, you need to be sponsored. I'm willing to sponsor you, if you'll do a little something for me first." Gadon smiled at me pleasantly. _Huh... and just how little might this be?_

"Which is…?"

"The Vulkars stole an accelerator prototype from our swoop bikes. Get it back for me, and I'll get you in the race," he said blandly. I could feel my eyes bugging out with disbelief. _That's a **little** something? Well, this will be interesting... I wonder if it really was theirs to begin with._

Zaerdra snorted in derision. I saw Carth's mouth drop open.

"Think they'll just let two strangers waltz on in and nick it?" I said sarcastically. "This doesn't really sound like help."

"You're in no position to bargain here!" Zaerdra snapped hotly. One of her lekku twitched and my eyes followed automatically. _What did she just call me? _Confusion followed – maybe I really was losing it if I thought a Twi'lek's headtails were insulting me.

"The Vulkars will win the swoop race hands down with that prototype," Gadon added.

"Why is that so important to you?" Carth asked suspiciously.

Gadon shrugged, but seemed content to answer our questions. "Prestige and power goes along with winning. If the Vulkars win again this year, more of the smaller gangs will flock to them," Gadon said flatly.

_Well, breaking into their base does sound like fun. _"All right, Gadon, say we do this. How do we get inside the Vulkar base?"

Gadon's strangely coloured eyes snapped to me once more. "It'd be suicide to try the main entrance. There's reports of a back way in the sewers. I know of one person who might be able to get you there – Mission Vao," Gadon supplied.

"Mission? Gadon, you can't be serious!" Zaerdra burst out in a horrified tone. "She's just a kid - how is she supposed to help them with this? I thought you agreed to keep her out of the Undercity!"

Gadon tensed, but kept his eyes on me and Carth. "Zaerdra, the Vulkars are stronger than us, and you know it. We need to win the swoop race."

"But you've never involved Mission before, and-"

"Zaerdra, I don't have a choice!" Gadon said heatedly. "You know that!" He sighed heavily, briefly closing his eyes before continuing his instructions. "You should find Mission in the Undercity, according to the latest rumours. Do not let her enter the Vulkar base, or you will become an enemy of the Beks. This I vow."

I felt my expression freeze. _Is that a threat, little man? _I took a deep breath. _No! He's a good man, don't get angry! Please! _I settled for nodding slowly at Gadon, not trusting myself to speak.

"Either bring the accelerator back, or destroy it. Our riders will beat the Vulkars without it."

"You're forgetting one thing," Carth interrupted. "Just how are we supposed to get past the Sith guard?"

Gadon grinned wickedly and held out his hand towards me. Clasped in it, he offered a large electronic data-chit. "Sith authorization papers, access to the upper, lower and bottom levels of Taris. That's my sign of trust."

Zaerdra was glaring stonily. I nodded my thanks. _If nothing else, he's an honourable man. _"I'll be back once I've dealt with the accelerator."

I turned, and headed out of the base, staring aggressively at every Bek that met my eye. I also made sure to slam that archaic door on my way out.

"Thanks, Jen," Carth muttered viciously, opening the door to let himself out as well. _Oops._

It was late, and we started the walk back to the hideout in silence.

"How could you just come right out and say Bastila's name?" Carth condemned a minute later. "You think they won't sell us out to the Sith for a few credits?"

"I think we had no other option," I responded coldly.

"I can't believe you were so quick to trust a gang leader!"

"He won't sell us out to the Sith," I finished in a flat tone. _Well, not until we've dealt with the accelerator, _my cynical mind added.

xXx

Darkness reigned, and I prowled through an empty apartment; for once feeling unwatched and alone. My connection with Bastila had vanished an hour ago, just as I'd given up on the idea of sleep. All evening I'd been swamped with her anger, her frustration - and at times a smug sense of satisfaction - which had all the more aroused my curiosity. _What had she been up to? I swear I could tell when she was using the Force, and it seemed like she was making an escape attempt. _The last emotions I'd sensed had been rage and denial, before her presence seemed to fade into drowsiness. Obviously she'd been sedated once more, I'd thought, but then her presence vanished completely from my mind an instant later. _Like she'd been cut off from the Force entirely. Like she'd been killed._

But no, I didn't believe that. I would have felt her life-force draining away if she had died. _Would I? How would I know what I'd feel? _While I was still curious about the Jedi's predicament, I'd decided to stop thinking and enjoy my new found freedom from her mental guarding.

I'd left Carth snoring back at the hideout, to go on a looting mission. _I may have promised not to steal again, but he clings to his mistrust so fiercely that I'd hate to disappoint him. _I'd sold those stims to buy dinner, which had only annoyed Carth further. _Would he rather starve? _He was irritated - presumably because I hadn't told him about my hidden stash.

I was back in the Lower City, checking out the flats I'd seen earlier. I was only really interested in credits, to start filling up my depleted purse. _That's not the only reason. I'm here trying to chase down a memory. _

Picking locks, and sneaking through people's homes... felt so familiar. _Was I a street kid? _A street kid with morals, perhaps, it didn't feel right to clean out a place out entirely. _Just take a little bit, only what I need. _

The grubby apartment I was looting was deserted for the night, and I flicked on a bedside lamp nonchalantly. _Whoever lives here certainly isn't rich. _

I saw a stack of holovids in the corner, and flicked through them curiously. _Jay in bantha heaven. Ugh! _I dropped the vid with a grimace, and rifled through a nearby bag. _Silly people leaving their credits lying about. _I took half of what I found, and turned to leave when the door opened.

"Who are you? Intruders!" a man in Vulkar colours yelled, and charged me. Surprised, I drew my blade almost too late. Behind him, two others were framed in the doorway

I parried, feinted to the left and sidestepped right, stabbing the guy in the side on my way past. He twisted, and my blow glanced off his armour. A second Vulkar jumped up beside him, wielding a double-bladed sword.

An icy sliver of desperation shuddered down my spine. _Use the Force, you moron! _I ducked and rolled to the right of both of them, jabbing the second one in the leg. _I don't know how! _He screamed, and whirled his blade frantically at me. It caught on my wounded shoulder, and I let out a shriek involuntarily, stumbling back a few steps.

_Agony. Push past the pain! _I gritted my teeth, pulled out my blaster with my free hand and shot him in the face. Another scream from him, this time his last.

A blast of pain in my fingers, and the gun dropped to the floor. _The third bastard shot me in the hand! _

"You die now!" he yelled, pointing the gun at my head. The first Vulkar was still on my left, advancing with a stun stick.

_I'm not going down to this scum! _Thoughts raged into a blistering storm, and something strong surged through me, uncontrolled. I could suddenly sense the environment around me as power, particles to be manipulated; but I had no real idea of what I was doing. I snarled, and raised my wounded hand towards the first man, clenching it despite the pain. I could feel him as he was raised off the floor, propelled into the air... right in front of the blaster shot aimed at me by the last Vulkar. _These bugs dare to hurt **me**?_ He gurgled in midair, and I pushed mentally at him. He was thrown backwards into the last man, so they both toppled to the floor. _I will not be stopped! No one can challenge me! _The sheer power of that ultimate rage tasted so sweet.

I stalked up to the two bodies in the doorway, and viciously stabbed my blade into both. A cut-off scream from the body underneath. _A sweet melody._

I looked up, and another shadow flickered across my consciousness, further down the public corridor. _No one can escape me. _The residential spectator was backpedaling away, futilely trying to escape. I ripped my blade out of the prone corpses, and threw it at down the hallway. It hit the bystander with a thud, and he slowly crumpled.

I watched his body fall, heard his dying moans, and reality sliced through my soul. _Oh no, no, no... what have I done? _I rushed to the stranger, fell to my knees and clutched at his shoulders. They convulsed once, and then remained still. His blank eyes stared up at me, accusing. _I've just murdered an innocent! Someone who was no threat! No! _A noise in my throat. _What have I become?_ I realized with a strange sense of numbness that I was crying. Part of me felt anguish, a deep sense of shame... and the rest just felt detached. _What's another to my tally?_

The empty eyes of the stranger still blamed me and bile rose in my throat. I fell backwards against the wall, shuddering, and dry-retched. _What have they done to me? What sort of monster am I?_

_I can't control this. I'm turning into something_..._ repulsive, loathsome. I can't keep doing this. _Funny how quiet Evil Bitch was all of a sudden. I didn't feel any glee at all, from any side of me.

_I need help; I've got to turn somewhere. Before I slaughter anyone else._

_I could use the Force again. Why this time, and not before?_

_I need help._

_Dia told me to see a doctor._

_Maybe the doctor who gave Onasi that kolto could help me. _

I left my vibroblade where it was, and walked out of the building. I didn't notice my surroundings, my thoughts were too rampant. _Death. Do I bring death wherever I go?_

xXx

I found the Medical Facility some time later - providentially just as it opened - a few hours before dawn. A rather shifty looking individual stood by the door, but I guessed he was simply an assistant. The man I took to be the doctor stood far inside in the room. He looked up as I approached.

"I see from your appearance that you are an offworlder," he said gravely. I wondered how it was so apparent. "Still, you are welcome here. I'll not have it said that Zelka Forn refused to help somebody just because they weren't a citizen of Taris."

"Hi," I began.

"What do you need? Healing? Medical Supplies?" Zelka asked briskly.

"Well, advice more than anything," I said.

"I see. What seems to be the problem?"

I'd tried to rehearse this in my head during the last hour. "I hit my head severely a few days ago, and ever since then I haven't been thinking straight."

Zelka peered at me through wizened eyes. "You probably have concussion then."

"Well, I don't think so," I continued. "What I mean, is that I've been having some very strong thoughts that are totally out of character, and I can't seem to control them."

"Can you elaborate on these thoughts?" he questioned, looking at me searchingly. _Damn, I was hoping he wouldn't ask that. _

"Well I'm usually a shy person," I lied. "But lately I've been having violent thoughts. Like, someone's been rude to me, and I've had to restrain myself from pushing them." _Nice embellishment of the truth there. Let's not tell him about my murder pangs._

"I see," Zelka answered, and then looked at my hand. "Pushed someone recently, have you?"

I flushed. With all the torment going through my mind, I'd forgotten about my injuries. "Uh, a fight I couldn't get out off." _A fight where I killed an innocent._

"Humph." Zelka picked up a pot of salve and started seeing to my hand as he continued the conversation. "And you've been having these thoughts ever since you hit your head?"

"Yes," I replied, "and I really need to concentrate on what I'm doing right now, but my emotions keep making things very difficult."

A frown creased the older man's face as he cleaned my hand. I tried not to wince. "Can you recall the events leading up to your injury?"

"Well, not really. It's all a bit hazy." _Like the last year._

Zelka was silent for a long time. "It could be your conscious self has forgotten something," he said slowly. _Hah! And the prize goes to the good doctor! _"Strong emotional outbursts after a head injury can be indicative of short-term amnesia. If some incident occurred that your conscious mind finds too traumatic to recall, your sub-conscious may have protected it as a defense mechanism. That could perhaps explain the emotional outbursts – your inner emotions manifesting in other ways. Are you sure your head injury was an accident, and not intentional?"

"Um, yeah." _How would I know, if I can't remember it?_

"Hrmm." He didn't look convinced. "Well, I'm not a psychoanalyst. My advice would be to go to your family or loved ones, and spend some time recuperating there."

"I-I can't," I hedged, "not for awhile, anyway. I just need some advice on how to deal with this. I've tried controlling my emotions, but that doesn't seem to work."

"That's probably because you are battling them, rather than resolving them," he said perceptively. "My next suggestion would be meditation and I'd strongly advise that, whenever you have spare time."

I nodded. "Anything else?"

"If it's getting too badly out of control I can prescribe you some medication, but the side effects are quite strong. Drowsiness, passivity, and reduced brain activity. I really would not suggest taking it unless absolutely necessary." _No, I'd rather not. _Zelka tapped his fingers on his desk. "Is there anything that brings you calmness, serenity? Maybe a reflective book, or an activity that gives you peace of mind? Something you can focus on?"

I thought for awhile, struggling to remember what hobbies Jen liked. _But would Jen's hobbies work for me? _I sat down on the chair opposite Zelka, and closed my eyes.

_Peace, serenity... what would make me feel like that?_ I slowed down my breathing, and tried concentrating inwardly.

…

_I could see a wooden board in front of me, with pieces of carved stone on different squares. They each had a different symbol engraved on them, and I could almost remember what they all meant. It had been a favourite pastime - a better way of meditation. The focus the game required forced all emotion from my soul as I concentrated purely on tactics._

_I moved a piece._

_"Match," I murmured, a smile curving on my face. I felt happiness, combined with restlessness, claim me once more, and my peace of mind had ended._

_"I'll win one of these days," a handsome boy sitting across from me responded, smiling ruefully at me._

_The scene faded slowly, and the last thing I saw was the beautiful, self-derogatory grin lighting up the boy's face as he stared at me affectionately._

…

I opened my eyes, and the present flooded back in. "And'zhai runes," I answered Zelka slowly. I remembered the name, but not the rules. I hoped I hadn't been sitting there too long. "It's a strategy game, similar to dejarik."

"I know neither game," Zelka said dryly, "but if playing it gives you peace, then that perhaps may be one solution. Since you say the game is based on strategy, then maybe you should focus on the tactics needed to play. The mind is like a beast, you know. It can be trained. If such exercises bring you serenity, then I'd suggest focusing on them whenever you feel your emotions going out of control.

I nodded, but my mind was still in a whirl from the flashback. _Was that the real me again? It was the same boy... and it certainly wasn't Jen or Evil Bitch. Was that another glimpse of who I really am? A street kid, who plays tactical games and hangs out with boys who wield lightsabers? How could that be?_

"Got another rakghoul case," a different voice interrupted my reverie, and I glanced up to see Zelka's assistant. "Some woman outside is begging for you to look at her daughter in the Lower City. I don't know how she got past the Sith patrol."

"Rakghoul case? What's that, some sort of disease?" I inquired.

"A terrible affliction that has plagued Taris for many generations," Zelka told me. "It is spread by the rakghouls - horrible monsters that live in the Undercity below Taris' great skyscrapers. Prolonged exposure to the Undercity breeds the disease, and those infected will eventually mutate into rakghouls themselves, becoming mindless beasts that attack anything on sight."

_Sounds like me, _a forlorn voice whispered. "Is there no cure?" I asked softly.

"Not a widely accessible one. I heard that the Republic scientists at the military base here on Taris were close to perfecting a cure. Then the Sith arrived." Zelka scowled. "They overran the base, and now they refuse to allow anyone access to the laboratories inside. The Sith are keeping all the serum for the patrols they send into the Undercity. If I could just get my hands on a sample of that serum the rakghoul disease could be wiped from the face of Taris forever!" he declared passionately. He sighed, the fierce emotion draining from his lined face. "But I don't see how that's going to happen."

I wanted to help this man. "Maybe I could find a way to get my hands on that serum for you." _Jen, go away._

"I don't see how anyone could get their hands on that serum," he concluded briskly. "The military base is crawling with Sith guards. Breaking in there would be tantamount to suicide. And now, I'd best see this lady waiting outside."

"Thank you for your help Zelka," I responded. "I appreciate it."

"I hope it helps. You can always come back if you are still having problems. There are a few hypnotic techniques we can try, but there are risks involved." _Hypnosis? I've already had the Jedi screw with my mind, and I don't think it's amnesia I'm suffering from. I hope his advice works._

He looked at me steadily. "I can sell you that medication if you think you may need it."

"It couldn't hurt. How much?" _Always good to be prepared, I guess. The passive side-effects kinda scare me... but you never know when drugs could come in handy._ Zelka gave me a small bottle, plus a few sedatives, for about half the credits I'd lifted that night. _He's very cheap; I wonder if he makes any money out of this shop at all?_ Zelka nodded farewell to me, and walked outside.

I stood up, and stretched. _Onasi's probably scared silly I've run off again, I should head back._ As I passed the assistant, he nudged me none too subtly.

"Psst! You there," he whispered loudly. "Wait a minute. I need to talk to you about the rakghoul serum. I've got an offer for you that you might want to hear."

"An offer? What are you talking about?"

"Zelka isn't the only one who wants to get his hands on the rakghoul serum. Davik Kang will pay you ten times what Zelka can if you can get the cure."

"Um, no thanks," I mumbled, edging away. _I don't want to start my raging thoughts going again!_

"Don't be stupid!" The insistent creep followed me. "We're talking a thousand credits here! Just remember, if you get your hands on that rakghoul serum, take it to Zax at the Lower City bounty office."

I fled outside. But... _a thousand credits? That'll be enough to get me a trip outta here after we rescue flyboy's Jedi girlfriend. _I recoiled. _No! That's just wrong! Think of all the suffering people!_ I swallowed, and strained to concentrate on a single And'zhai piece. All the rune stones in different places. I couldn't remember how to play, but I could sense the tactical possibilities, the calm concentration needed. I felt the anger and fear dissipating, like a dream fading as reality comes back to clutch you. _Serenity._

_Wow, that actually worked._

Yet, as I walked away, I realized that a thousand credits had its' own allure.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_snackfiend101 - yeah I didn't want to make things too easy on her! Didn't really fit that she'd be -naturally- good at pazaak, but by using the force...hehehe_


	8. Into the dark

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Eight – Into the dark**

_- Carth Onasi -_

* * *

_She's gone again. _I scowled, and tried to concentrate on the blaster I was upgrading. _First she loses all our money, then she almost gets us slaughtered by the Beks, and now she's disappeared again. Damn her! _The constant state of worry and irritation I'd been in since we landed on Taris was getting a little tiresome. _Why should I worry about a reckless, crazy, selfish woman? _Although, she **had** given away a hundred credits to that harassed merchant. _I really don't know what to make of her._

Our predicament with money was bugging me, too. We had enough left for a few days meals - thanks to Jen's little stash of drugs she kept from me - but we needed more security. _Don't tell me I have to be Blaster Boy again. _I honestly wasn't sure I could take on the next duelist, at any rate.

"Oh, you're awake," Jen commented as she swept nonchalantly into the room.

"Yes," I responded bitingly. "I take it you don't believe in sleep?"

"Are you getting testy again?" A small smile curved her lips, but it didn't look genuine.

"I don't get testy, I get angry," I snapped, "and if I was angry, you wouldn't need to ask me."

"Fine!" She threw her hands up in mock defeat, and I noticed one was bandaged. My eyes narrowed.

"Have you been in another fight?" I demanded. A dull red colour suffused her face. _What has she been doing? Not stealing again, after she promised?_

"I don't want to talk about it," Jen answered in a cool voice.

"Fine!" I echoed her sarcastically. _Why am I so grumpy?_

Jen sighed loudly, and I had to restrain myself from doing the same. "Shall we just get on with things?" she said tiredly.

I nodded curtly and reassembled my gun. _I guess I should be trying to get along with her. _"Breakfast, and then the Undercity?" I queried in a more pleasant voice. At her nod, I picked up both my blasters and eyed her over. "Where's your vibroblade?"

She paled. "I lost it," she muttered. I eyed her suspiciously. _How can you **lose** a vibroblade? _I sighed. _I suppose I should drop it. Not like she's answering anyway._

"Grab the spare one." I pointed at the blade she had lifted the night before. "And Jen," I paused as her wary eyes met mine. "Uh, the rakghouls are pretty dangerous in the Undercity, you know."

She shot me a derisive look. "Yes. I know."

"What I mean, uh, is that you should, well, be a little more careful." _Damn, I hate it when I start stammering!_

"I'll try." She smiled falsely at me, and I felt my ire returning.

"Look, all I'm trying to say is, use a blaster would you?" I snapped. _She's going to get bitten, I know it. All you need is one bite from a rakghoul, and you're infected. Stang, if only I could check out the Undercity by myself!_

Jen had closed her eyes, and was taking in a deep, audible breath.

"Are you trying to control your temper?" I asked, my irritation warping into something close to amusement. _Hah, that'll be the day._

"Yes, actually. I thought you wouldn't appreciate me cutting your head off, but do let me know if I'm wrong," she snapped.

_Well, there went my sense of humour._ "Look, let's just get going, alright?"

After a pointedly silent breakfast, we headed back down to Lower Taris. I certainly wasn't in the mood to converse, and so far Jen was following suit. Of course, the chances of Jen staying silent longer than ten minutes were considerably lower than that of winning a Hutt's lottery, but one could always hope.

"Carth, can I ask you some questions?" she queried as we walked down the Lower City corridors.

I struggled not to groan. "Oh? You want to argue some more, is that it?"

"I'm always up for a good fight," she quipped.

I laughed despite myself. _Damn woman. Makes me laugh, and gets me angrier than anyone I've known... for a long time. _I glanced at her, and saw that mischievous twist to her mouth I was almost becoming... fond of. Her eyes still had a bleak cast to them, despite the humour dancing there. I wondered what had happened to her last night. "I suppose a few questions can't hurt. What is it?"

"Well," she began, "I was just wondering if you knew about the ruins that the Jedi onboard the Endar Spire were investigating."

_She was the one hired by the Jedi Council, not me! _I frowned at her. "I'm sure you'd know more about their quest than I."

She avoided my gaze. "I know they were looking at ruins, which was why they hired me. But they refused to tell me anything about them. Confidentiality clauses, and all that."

"Jen, I was onboard as an advisor, for most part. The Jedi certainly didn't tell me anything I didn't need to know. They like to be mysterious." I couldn't quite stop the bitterness from reaching my voice.

She arched an eyebrow at me. "You really don't like the Jedi much, do you?"

I shrugged, in what I hoped was dismissal of the subject. _What self-respecting Republic soldier does like the Jedi? For all that they're on our side, they have this nasty habit of sweeping in where they're not wanted, and up-ending everybody's carefully worked-out battle plans. Oh, and keeping you in the dark_. "I don't dislike them. I just don't particularly trust them much."

"You don't trust anyone much," she muttered.

"For good reasons – which are my own!" I snapped. I could feel my sour mood returning. _I hate being grilled. _"Look, I'm not overly fond of the Jedi because I've seen firsthand just what damage they can do."

"Damage? Jedi?" She sounded incredulous.

"Have you never heard of the Dark Side?" I said impatiently.

"Oh, you mean the Sith."

"Yes, and most of them used to be Jedi." I sighed. "I fought in the Mandalorian wars, under Revan and Malak. They were heroes. No one expected them to turn on us the way they did. Think about it... if you can't even trust the best of the Jedi, who can you trust?"

That seemed to quieten her, and we reached the Undercity entrance without further conversation.

The Sith guard let us past, which frankly surprised me. I'd been somewhat dubious about the authorization papers Gadon had given us, but they were obviously genuine enough. We'd had no problems traversing between the upper and lower levels of Taris, but I had expected difficulties in reaching the Undercity. Maybe I was just too pessimistic, but I hated it when everything seemed just a little too easy.

The elevator opened, and the smell hit my senses before anything else. _Ugh, people live in this stench? _I suppose they had no choice, I'd heard that criminals got exiled permanently down here.

The scene was frankly dismal. Small shacks made out of rubble – mostly broken bits of plasteel and durasteel – lined the open courtyard. A few walking corpses lumbered about, the denizens of this bleak world. Everything was bathed in a grimy brown light, which was probably the only version of sunshine that reached this shadowy corner of Taris.

"You there! Upworlder!" A man dressed in filthy rags stumbled towards us. "Anyone using this elevator has to pay the toll!"

"I don't believe this planet!" I muttered incredulously. I heard Jen stifle a laugh. "Look, we don't have any credits." _Well, barely any. Although Jen probably lifted some during the night._

A second drifter joined the first. "You're lying, you're an upworlder! It's our elevator, if you use it you've got to give us something!" _Their elevator? Hah, wonder what the Sith would say about that._

Jen stepped up beside me, lifted her blaster, and yelled loudly, "get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"

The beggars squawked, clutched at each other, and ran.

I stared at Jen in shock. "What, picking on the homeless now?" _Is she angry again? _But no, she seemed to be sniggering. I felt my mood coalesce into disbelief – though frankly, nothing Jen could do these days should surprise me anymore. "You found your little display amusing?"

"Hey, I was using the blaster, isn't that what you wanted?" She smirked at me. Her grin disappeared under my glare, and she stared down at her feet. "To be honest, we don't really have credits to give them. They would have stuck around harassing us, if I hadn't threatened them."

"Uh huh," I responded suspiciously. _Maybe her logic is right, but I don't quite buy it._

I turned my attention back to the Undercity. Most of the inhabitants were content to leave us be, possibly after witnessing two beggars flee from us as if their life depended on it. One young woman – someone who acted far too optimistic for living down here – was bold enough to approach us and let slip a little about the area. We were far from the only visitors here, she informed us. In fact, the Undercity seemed a meeting place for all the sorts of people I wanted to avoid. _Exchange mercenaries, Vulkars on a looting mission, and oh, let's not forget the Sith._

I sighed, thanked the girl absently, and wandered through the ramshackle village with Jen at my heels. The place was surrounded by iron gates to keep the rakghouls out. Presumably there were other camps scattered around the place, though the idea of being forced to live in such filth and darkness made me pity all the dwellers down here.

We headed to the leader of the encampment, after being stopped briefly by a crazy old coot who proclaimed Jen as his saviour. I had to bite back a laugh at her embarrassment as she stormed off towards Gendar, the leader.

After a brief conversation, he informed us that Mission Vao had been through late last night, but not yet returned. That was enough information for us to get going and brave the rakghouls, and we were stopped only by the guard at the edge of the village.

As the gates were opened for us, I grabbed Jen's arm. She yanked her hand away, and turned furious green eyes on me. "Heh, that's right, you don't like being touched." _That woman has far too many issues._

She scowled. "What do you want?"

"It's just, uh, well, what I said earlier today. The rakghouls seem pretty crazy. Almost as crazy as you, heh." I coughed as her glare seemed to intensify. "Look, I just get this feeling you're going to get bitten by one if you aren't careful. Just- just try to be a bit more cautious? For my sake?"

Her glare vanished, and she smiled sweetly at me. "Aw, flyboy, I didn't know you felt that way." She stalked out of the gates, leaving me staring at her back.

"Argh!" I groaned in frustration, and followed her out. "Damn fool woman!"

She turned back to grin at my scowl, but it looked forced. Just like it had all day. _Something's been bothering her since last night._

I held my blaster defensively, and visually search the barren landscape. No rakghouls in sight, just darkness and rubble. "Where did you go last night, Jen?"

"I don't want to talk about it," she responded coolly, an echo of this morning's conversation. I noticed with relief she was holding a blaster, rather than her preferred weapon of choice.

"Did you go on a looting mission again?" I persisted.

She sighed in defeat. "Yes, I did. Yes, I broke my promise, and yes, we have more credits. Oh, and no, I don't want to talk about it."

I was just about to retort angrily, when a desperate voice called out from the darkness.

"Please, you have to help me!" A click, and suddenly a Twi'lek girl appeared to the right of us. _Stealth belt, _I thought in surprise._ A good one, too._

"Mission!" Jen exclaimed. I recognized the Twi'lek girl as she said it. _How fortuitous. _

"Please, say you'll help me! Nobody else will, not even the Beks!" She ran up to Jen, pleading, her eyes wide and fearful. "But I can't just leave him there - he's my friend!"

"Whoa, slow down, Mission," Jen said in a soothing tone. "What's wrong?"

"It's Zaalbar. He's in trouble - big trouble! We have to help him. If we don't they'll sell him into slavery!" Words tumbled out in a rush. _Zaalbar. Her Wookiee friend?_

"Your Wookiee friend?" Jen echoed my thoughts. "Take a deep breath and tell me what happened."

That seemed to slow Mission's panic a bit. "Me... me and Zaalbar were just wandering around here in the sewers. You know, looking for stuff we could find, just kind of exploring. We do it all the time. Only this time they were waiting for us! Gamorrean slave hunters! We didn't even have a chance to escape. Big Z threw himself at them, and he roared for me to run!" she sobbed. "Please, I can't just leave him there! But I'm afraid I won't be able to rescue him by myself!"

_Well, we do need her help, but charging down a pack of Gamorreans? _I shot Jen a dubious look, and she glared at me in response. _What now? She expects me to be ecstatic about running into danger?_

"Of course we'll help you, Mission," she soothed. "We actually need your help in return."

_I love it how she makes decisions for me._ I sighed._ I could do with a holiday._

"You'll help me!" Mission's eyes were now shining with hope. She sniffed. "Great! Thank you! Let's go!"

_Wonderful. If it wasn't bad enough being stuck with a crazy violent woman, I now get to keep company with a chatty kid who has a penchant for trouble. I'll just bet those two will get on great._

"Where are they keeping Zaalbar?" Jen enquired.

"They ambushed us in the sewers – the stink reminds them of home, I guess. I don't know for sure where their base is, but it can't be far. Uh, you said you wanted my help in return?" Mission was tense, her eyes flicking from Jen, me, and our surroundings. She didn't totally trust us, but a fragile look of hope softened her young face. _She's just a kid. A kid racing into danger to rescue her friend. _If nothing else, this Mission had guts – but it would have been nice to acquire her help without charging down a bunch of slavers.

"Yeah," Jen responded. "Gadon said you'd help me get inside the Vulkar base."

"The Vulkar base?" Mission's lekku twitched. "You're going there? Cool! Just, let's get Big Z back first, please."

_Cool? Cool! _I stared at the girl in dawning horror. _I'm right; those two will get on far too well for my liking._

"It's a deal," Mission continued. "After we find Big Z, I'll take you to the back entrance."

I looked up and saw a group of men in the distance.

"We have company," I warned. Jen and Mission stopped walking, and readied their blasters as the group approached. As the closest one came into range, he raised a rifle and called out to us in a nervous voice.

"Don't... don't move! I'm... I'm not afraid to use this blaster if I have to!"

A heavyset man further behind walked up beside him, and laid a cautionary hand on his arm. "Settle down, kid," he said gruffly, in a thick accent I knew all too well. _Mandalorian. _An instinctive feeling of dislike wedged itself in my gut._ I hate those bastards. _

He turned to face us, eyed us up and down, and dismissed us with a glance. "Hrm... by the looks of you I'd say you're down here for the same reason we are: to salvage something from those downed Republic space pods. Let me give you some advice: forget about it. Do yourself a favor and just head back the way you came." He issued it like a command. _Heh, well that's going to annoy Jen. _But as I looked at her, a strange detached expression appeared over her face.

She said something back to the leader, in a language I couldn't follow. _What the heck was that? Can she speak Mandalorian? _The leader of the mercenaries appeared as surprised as I felt, but responded in the same language. I stood, dumbfounded, while they had a brief conversation. _A conversation? Jen's having a frelling conversation in Mandalorian?_ I'd caught some Mandalorian phrases during the war, enough to understand the man introducing himself as Canderous, but the rest was unintelligible. They nodded to each other respectfully, and Canderous led his men away.

"Wow, he looked pretty tough!" Mission said brightly as the group disappeared from view.

"Hang on, sister," I said warningly as Jen started moving away. "You can speak Mandalorian?"

"Well, um, I learnt languages when I was studying," she said in a rush.

"I thought you studied archaeology." I said darkly.

"Cool, did ya go to a university or something?" Mission cut in. "Where you from, Jen?"

Jen looked at me blandly, but turned to answer Mission instead."A planet called Deralia. I studied mostly archaeology, history, and languages." _And languages? Hah, why does it sound like she tacked that on to the end for my benefit?_

"But Mandalorian?" I muttered skeptically. _I've had my doubts whether she's loyal to the Republic before. This just seems to confirm it._

"So, why you guys here on Taris?" Mission continued. _Inquisitive brat._

"Hey, is that an escape pod?" Jen deftly side-stepped the question, and pointed up ahead. That caught my attention, and I let it go. Why Jen could speak Mandalorian was something I'd find out later – for now, I decided, I'd best just keep my mind on our environment.

"Let's go have a quick look." I said.

The cockpit of the escape pod was mostly intact, door included, but the remainder was a pile of twisted metal and scorch marks. We searched through the rubble, but it had already been stripped clean. _Not even a medpac or halogen lamp left._

"The Sith or some of Davik's boys musta' been here first," Mission said.

"There's something up ahead," Jen muttered, going rigid. My vision snapped up, and I could see three blurs heading towards us. _Rakghouls._ Mission squeaked, and with a click, vanished. I stepped up next to Jen, both blasters aimed, and fired when the first was in range.

The mutants were resilient, with both Jen and I firing multiple shots before the first one fell. _They're tough. Tougher than I expected. _Jen and I fired in unison, and the second one dropped about ten paces away from us. _Damn, they must have a weakness. _I squinted, and steadied my aim. _This one's going down, _I thought determinedly as it galloped closer.

The wind was knocked from my lungs as something slammed into my side, knocking me to the ground. Mission screamed. _What the...? _I struggled to move, but a heavy weight pinned me, snarling. _A fourth rakghoul? _I'd been concentrating so fiercely on my aim that I'd been caught unawares, I realized in self-disgust.

I grunted, twisted my arm free and shot it in the head, just as its teeth dug into my shoulder. Red hot pain lanced through my side, and I heard it shriek from the blaster wound. It swiped its claws through my armour, and bit down on my other arm. _One shot in the head is not enough?_ I screamed in agony, and could almost feel the venom enter my bloodstream. The smell of rotting flesh invaded my senses, and its jaw clamped down a third time on my arm. Blood filled my eyes, and with a desperate grunt I rammed my blaster into the growling mass of fur, firing again and again. _What does it take for these things to die?_

A swishing noise, and the weight was lifted off me. I panted, and opened eyes to see Jen, looking concerned and almost fearful. _Concerned? For me? Hah._ Dull horror invaded my thoughts as I fully realized what had happened. _I've got the rakghoul disease, _I thought numbly. _I'm a dead man._

"This is bad, Republic!" she muttered, trying to drag me up into a sitting position.

My vision blurred, and my arm pulsed and throbbed in agony. "Don't call me that," I mumbled.

"Mission – how long does it take for someone to transform?" I heard her demand.

"Um, usually around eight hours, or so. But he's been bitten heaps, Jen! It'll be, like, way less time!" Her voice was shaken, scared. "There's no way to stop the rakghoul disease!"

_Poetic justice. I was so certain Jen would be the one to get into trouble._ "You've got to go," I rasped. _This is the end. _Horror curled in my stomach. I could feel a fever settling in. My good arm tingled. My bad arm burned. _I might kill them yet. _"I might transform, you need to go."

"Sith patrols carry the serum," she told me. _Serum? I haven't heard about any cure for the disease. _I could feel something crawling through my veins. I wasn't sure if it was paranoia or not. Darkness crept in around the edges of my vision.

"Shoot me," I mumbled. _I'm going to transform into one of those monsters. No!_ I felt my eyes closing, and fell back to a lying position. "I'll kill you, if I transform. End it, before I kill you!" _Funny, I never thought it'd end this way._

"Mission, give me a hand here," Jen demanded. My legs lifted.

"What are you doing?" the kid asked. I moaned as something pushed against my arm, and pain blossomed down my side. I vaguely heard the girl grunt.

"Man, he's heavy!"

I was half-carried, half dragged somewhere. I could see her face again. _I'm sorry, love, I never avenged your death. Forgive me. _Her bright blue eyes shining with love. Her crumpled bloody body in my arms.

_I'm getting delirious. _I snapped open my eyes determinedly, and Jen was once again hovering over me. With some confusion, I realized they'd placed me in the escape pod.

"I'll find some serum," she told me.

"Just make sure you find Bastila," I said weakly. My fingers felt numb, prickly; I seemed to be losing my sense of touch. _Bastila's the only hope left for the Republic. I can't really trust Jen to go after her, but I have no other choice left._

"I'll rescue her, I promise." I heard Jen's soft voice as I closed my eyes.

"Heh, like you promised not to steal again?" I joked feebly.

I closed my eyes again, and heard the door shut manually above me.

* * *

xXx

* * *


	9. A pair of sneaks

**_Disclaimer_** **_- see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Nine – A pair of sneaks**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

Panic was gnawing at the edges of my control. I strode away from the crash site, eyes searching dark corners and darker courtyards up ahead. 

"You locked him in the escape pod?" Mission squeaked behind me. I was glad she'd joined us, somehow her presence made it easier for me to stay calm. _She follows me for now; I must be strong. _The focusing trick Zelka had suggested helped also, but it didn't make my emotions vanish like I'd hoped. _Just subdued them a little._

"Seemed like a good idea. He doesn't have time for us to move him to a safer place."

The entire Undercity felt like it had a presence all of its own. Dark, cloying, decaying. _If I hadn't seen Zelka last night, I would be mad by now. _I tried to shrug off that thought. _I must stay rational; Onasi needs me, Mission needs me. _When did I become the strong one? The concept seemed a little foreign. After all - Jen couldn't lead a bantha to water, and Evil Bitch would use terror rather than strength.

_It's the real me again, isn't it? _The flashback I'd had earlier was more than just about a game. I'd somehow pushed my emotions away; not denying them, but merely remaining detached. _That's a Force trick. _Somehow, I was sure of that._ Was I some sort of trainee Jedi? _I thought I'd been a street kid. _Maybe I had. Maybe that boy had taught me how to use the Force. _But the last few times I'd touched it, I'd lost control. I was trying fervently to ignore the power out there, all around me. At times, it felt like it wanted to be used.

Movement up ahead caught my attention. I stopped walking, and aimed both blasters in determination. I was glad I'd had enough foresight to relieve Carth of his weapons before shutting him inside the pod.

I heard a click beside me. _Mission, invisible again._

We held our ground as the rakghoul lumbered towards us. _At least there's only one this time. _I wasn't sure if I could handle another group of four – and this time, without Carth's help.

I waited tensely until the creature came closer, and started firing. Mission followed suit, and the monster dropped with a piercing shriek. _I hope no others heard that. _

"I normally just hide from them," Mission whispered. _She doesn't like killing, does she?_

"Hiding's good, in case something happens to me," I said calmly. _Why am I so calm? So detached, so logical? Battle rage usually takes over by this point. _Going berserk right now would kill me. "But I really need your help."

"You mean it, don't you?" The startled tone in Mission's voice took me by surprise. "I don't know if anyone's ever said that to me before."

I looked at the girl, reconsidering her abilities. Sure, she was young, and probably far too impulsive, but her street skills alone made her a worthy ally. I gave her a quick smile, one I hoped would be taken as reassuring.

Walking closer to the rakghoul corpse, I checked it quickly for life signs. _Dead. _The mutated head was scorched with fatal blaster shots, and white, gluey eyes stared blankly back at me. I shivered, and then my eyes caught on another body nearby. _Not a rakghoul. No, that's a human. _I ran over to it, almost tripping in my haste. But searching the second corpse availed little.

"A medpac and a journal," I murmured, clicking on the datapad. It mentioned something about a Promised Land, and I remembered that crazy old geezer, Rukil, ranting after me in the Outcast Village. _Just another chance for Onasi to crack up laughing at me again, _I thought to myself sourly. _Sod it all, I **will** find that serum._

"Before you found us, did you happen across any dead Sith?" I asked Mission as I stood, walking away from the corpses.

"Not today," she answered, hurrying to keep up. "But the bodies usually stripped clean anyway. D'ya really think they'll have serum on them?"

"I-" _I don't really want to answer that. _"I have to try. Blaster Boy saved my life."

Mission blinked, and giggled at the pet name. I smiled briefly at her, but my heart wasn't in it.

"We could look up north, I've seen patrols round there before," she offered. I nodded to her, and we set off again.

Corpses littered the area, mostly half-eaten. I forced myself to frisk all the bodies we came across, but with each fruitless search, I was becoming more disheartened. The smell of the place curled like bile in my stomach; I tried to ignore it. _No time to be sick. No time to be angry!_

We managed to avoid a number of rakghoul groups, and Mission's stealth surprised me. _I don't know why it should, really. She** is** a street kid. _The rakghouls primary long-distance sense appeared to be movement, and by staying still and silent we avoided most battles. A few either heard us or smelt us, but we took them down before any real threat appeared. _We can do this – as long as we don't run into another large group._

I was dimly aware that Onasi's time was running out. Part of me was panicking, scared and afraid he would die. Another side was demanding coldly that I should return and kill him before he transformed. I ruthlessly managed to force both emotions away. _You can't deny me forever. _Another unbidden thought. I scowled, and concentrated on the bleak landscape.

"There's some bodies up ahead, looks like Sith armour," Mission whispered, stealing back my attention.

"Good spotting," I murmured back, and she smiled brightly at me. _She's not often encouraged, is she? _I knew the girl was struggling to hold her own fear at bay; panic for her friend, anxiety for the environment we were in.

"We'll find the serum, Mission. And then we'll rescue Zaalbar," I said staunchly, heading over to the bodies. I could almost feel her spine stiffen in renewed resolve. _Why bother with trite, meaningless words? Fear is a better motivator. _I blocked the thought out, but could not dissipate my edginess. Realization of my own mortality was setting in – if Carth could go down so easily to the rakghouls, then so could I. _Why am I wasting time helping a Republic pilot that could mutate into a threat? His true loyalty is not with me; his value as a tool is almost nothing. _But he had saved me, and I could not – would not – leave him to die.

_Fool. Attachments lead to vulnerability, to a weakness that can be exploited._

Small tendrils were unraveling; I could feel my emotions starting to spiral out of control. Gritting my teeth, I closed my eyes briefly and recalled the vision I'd had yesterday. A board covered in rune stones; the Coruscanti Staff rune was in the front, vulnerable on it's left flank, but the potential for offense was there. A gap in the opponent's line of attack – if I moved the Corellian Dagger forward, I'd be able to break right through.

The voice dimmed to a barely audible whisper. I opened my eyes, pursed my lips, and strode forward.

"Jen, wait!" Mission ran up to me. I stopped, and turned. "A mine," she panted, and took a few steps closer.

I searched the ground, and suddenly spotted it. _Too busy having an argument with myself to see the threat, _I thought in disgust.

"I can disarm it," Mission reassured, kneeling down._ I hope you can, kid, because I have no idea how._ A minute later, and she picked up the landmine, pocketing it.

"You're full of surprises, Mission," I murmured. She flashed a quick grin at me.

The corpses were Sith, flaring up the hope in my belly. I ripped off the tattered armour quickly, checking the pockets as I did so.

"Cool, an energy shield!" Mission was searching the second corpse. I found a handful of credits, and a shot of kolto, but no serum. _Sithspit. I need this!_

Mission stood, indicating she was finished, and shot me a despairing look. _His time is quickly vanishing. _I looked ahead, and my eyes caught on an unmoving lump next to a black wall. I walked closer, weapon ready, and my eyes made out the shape of a person. I heard Mission follow.

"Another Sith corpse," I said in relief, crouching down next to the body.

Pressure clamped down on my throat. "Not a corpse!" a voice rasped, shattering my concentration. I gurgled as a hand tightened on my windpipe, shock and rage surfacing. _Focus. No, kill!_ With a muffled snarl, I lifted my blaster and shot the Sith twice. He shrieked, and fell against the wall.

"Are you okay?" Concern made the Twi'lek's voice even more high-pitched. I panted, rubbing my throat tenderly. _I'm okay. He's dead. I'm not angry. I'm in control. Focus._

"He just took me by surprise," I muttered. _Best to be sure. _I lifted the blaster and shot the corpse a third time. Mission jumped slightly.

The Sith had obviously been infected himself, judging by the bite marks on his leg. With a despairing groan, I saw an empty needle sticking out from his extended limb. _Just my luck, he's already used it. _I searched his body with a numbing despondency.

_More credits, more stims. _I looked closer at the two needles I'd picked up, and then quickly back at the empty injection to be sure. _No, these aren't stims!_

"I think this is the serum, Mission," I said breathlessly. "This guy must have taken his friends' share. He used one, we have two left. Come on; let's get back to Captain Flyboy."

Hope shone out of Mission's eyes, and she grinned at me. "Captain?" she queried as I jumped to my feet.

"Yeah, he's a pilot." I answered distractedly, breaking into a jog.

"Pilot? Who are you guys?"

_Sod it all. I've said too much again, haven't I?_ "Questions later, okay?" I broke into a sprint, stopping only at corners to check what was up ahead.

The landscape passed in a blur, and we were lucky to avoid any encounters. I breathed a sigh of relief when we reached the escape pod. My sense of reprieve collapsed as I noticed something different.

"The door's open," Mission whispered.

Fear iced through my veins. _No, we can't be too late! _I ran to the escape pod. The seat was empty. _No! I'm the one who does the disappearing act, dammit!_ I glanced around furtively. _He can't be gone, not like this! _My eyes snagged on a body close by. I ran to it.

_Onasi. Barely breathing._

I ruthlessly jabbed the first injection into his arm, emptying it. No response from him. He looked bad; his injuries had blackened in the time we'd been away. _Let that just be the disease, and nothing else. _I pulled out the kolto I'd looted, and injected that as well. Mission stood a few feet away, eyes wide on the scene. _Still no movement from him. _I unsheathed my vibroblade, and Mission gasped. Deftly I used it to cut away his tattered clothing, and then pulled apart a medpac, grabbing a pot of salve. The bite marks were festering. _It can't be too late. _I smeared the stinking stuff on his shoulder and arm.

"Flyboy, wake up, damn you!" I cursed, kneeling down and shaking him. "I'll kill you if you're dead!"

He coughed all of a sudden, and opened his eyes. "I won't ask how you're going to achieve that," he said weakly. "What happened this time? I feel like I've been put through a slag grinder."

Mission laughed in relief. My panic dissipated. "How'd you get out of the escape pod?"

He blinked and looked at me in a daze. "The pod? The rakghouls! I- What are you doing back here?" He gulped, and I saw desperation invade his pain-filled features. "Jen, leave here at once! I might transform!"

"You're sounding better already," I said dryly, "if you're bossing me around again. Relax, Onasi, I found some serum."

He stared at me in shocked disbelief. "I, uh," he coughed weakly. "I don't dare believe you. I feel like shit. Are you serious?"

I grinned. "Yep, I saved your ass. We're square, flyboy."

"Oh, heh." He closed his eyes again.

"We need to get you outta here, Onasi. You can rest in the outcast village," I said briskly, motioning to Mission. She nodded at me, and together we dragged the protesting republic soldier to his feet.

xXx

Mission was stretching her shoulder in grumbling complaint. Mine felt a bit stiff from lugging Onasi back to the village as well. We'd got him walking, but he leaned heavily on us most of the way. _I'm just relieved we were so close to the village. We would have been defenseless had the rakghouls attacked._

While Carth was still badly injured, the remnants of the disease seemed to have left him. He was weak and grumpy, but no longer dizzy or delirious. His injuries had turned a painful red colour. _Much better than black. _

The outcasts had been too panicked to let us in, until I'd shown them the Sith serum. Even then, they'd suggested locking him up with some infected villagers. I think I'd scared Mission by threatening to behead the healer. Either way, we'd come to a compromise. Carth hadn't appreciated being tied tightly to a pole, but at least the resident healer promised to see to his injuries.

_We're even now. This means I don't have to rescue Bastila. _I was trying to ignore that little voice. It was the same one suggesting I sell the extra serum to Davik. I sat down against a wall with a heavy sigh. _Too many things to think about. _Not to mention that encounter I'd had earlier with the mercenaries.

…

_"(This is not our battlefield; now is not yet our fight,)" the words came out unexpectedly, in a foreign language, and I had to resist clamping my hand over my mouth in surprise. A vague recollection from the twisted archives of my mind told me that it was a traditional Mandalorian warrior's greeting. _Mandalorian?

_"(I have no fight with you,)" the heavyset man responded. _That's not the standard answer,_ I realized. _But then, I'm not Mandalorian._ "(My name is Canderous Ordo. I'd like to know who you are, and how you know such phrases, but now is not the time,)" he continued._

_"(As they die upon my blade, my adversaries know me as Jen,)" I returned. Again, in Mandalorian format. He glared at me quizzically._

_"(I want to talk to you later. But the rakghouls have picked off enough of my men. Again, I'll repeat my advice: get out of here.)" With an almost respectful nod, he led his men away.  
_

…

I remembered one of my earlier flashbacks, and the boy I'd spoken to had talked about the Mandalorian wars. _Did I fight in them? I seem to be able to hold my own in battle, true enough. But... whose side was I on?_

"Jen?" Mission's querying voice disrupted my reverie. I glanced up her; she looked tense.

"What's up Mission?"

"I'm worried about Big Z." She was biting her lip, shooting me worried looks. "We need to go after him; the Gamorreans could sell him any minute!"

"Mission, don't you think we should wait until Onasi's healed up a bit?"

He was cursing in the centre of the village. _Heh, flyboy's not used to being tied up. Obviously he hasn't been meeting the right women. _Every now and then he'd turn to glare furiously at us, but I figured he'd forgive me eventually.

"That'll take too long, Jen! He'll probably still be too hurt tomorrow, even with kolto!"

_She's right. But just the two of us, heading into the sewers?_ "By all accounts, the sewers are even more dangerous, Mission. How did you and Zaalbar avoid the rakghouls so easily?"

"Well-" She crouched down next to me. "I just hid. And Big Z's pretty quiet, when he wants to be, y'know. People often forget he's there. Of course we couldn't always avoid 'em, but he can rip them to shreds easily enough. Look, I can't just abandon him there!"

"Fair enough." A trip to the sewers did appeal to the bloodthirsty side of me. And the rational part added that it would be a good way to stop thinking. _I didn't lose control with Mission out there. Well... I almost did, but I can control it. And it's better than sitting here and arguing with myself about whether I should rescue Bastila, who to sell the serum to, or why I can speak Mandalorian._

"I know!" Mission said brightly, unclipping something from her belt. "I've got a spare stealth belt. Ever used one?" She handed it to me, and I climbed to my feet.

I looked at the device, and recognition dawned. _Why yes, I have. _I clipped it on. "Yep, good thinking. Should be easy enough to avoid the rakghouls. Let's go, then."

She beamed hopefully at me, and we strode towards the exit. I heard Carth shouting weakly in protest behind us, but did not turn.

xXx

We stalked silently through the deserted landscape, Mission leading the way towards the sewer entrance. I could barely make her out, and that was only because I was concentrating. _Her stealth belts are very good quality indeed._

It was easier to avoid the rakghouls like this, and I surprised myself by making as little noise as Mission as we snuck along. _I must have grown up on the streets; I'm used to sneaking around where I'm not allowed._

Mission walked up to a large hole in the wall, and waited for me there.

"This is the entrance we normally use," she whispered. "It comes out into a room, and I always lock the door behind me so it's safe."

"Did you lock it last time?" I remembered how panicked she had been.

"Uh, no." She sounded sheepish. I wondered briefly if Twi'lek's could blush.

"Let me go first," I said softly, pulling a blaster from my belt.

The hole led into a small chute, and I gingerly held onto the sides to stop myself from slipping. I saw the room below; dark, dingy, but empty. I jumped the short distance down, and stood facing the exit with my blaster raised as Mission joined me.

I wrinkled my nose as my olfactory senses where almost overwhelmed. "Ever get used to the smell down here?"

"Nope," she responded.

"I didn't think it could be worse than outside. Guess I was wrong."

She gave a soft chuckle.

We moved out, myself taking the lead as Mission gave directions. I couldn't hear any movement, and nothing but a dark empty corridor greeted us.

"So," Mission whispered as we started walking. "Are you gonna tell me who you guys are? Or do I have to guess?"

_Bugger, I was hoping she'd forget. _"Guess away, kid." I made sure to stress the last word. _Let's take a leaf out of Onasi's book, and see if this works._

"Hey, I ain't no kid!" she squawked indignantly. "I mean, you don't even look that much older than me!"

I grinned to myself. _That's one point to Carth, I guess._ "Well, you're pretty young to be on the streets by yourself, you know," I said mildly.

"I'm sixteen! I've been looking out for myself for years!" she grumped, and then turned silent.

I slowed as we neared the end of the corridor, listening intently for any sounds. I could hear some grunts far in the distance, but nothing close by.

"Which direction from here?" I whispered.

"Into the big chamber up ahead, then the first door on the right. That leads down another corridor, and we were at the end of it when we got ambushed. But the next chamber often has rakghouls in it," she spoke softly.

I nodded at her, mentally kicked myself when I realized she couldn't see me, and took a few steps forward. The chamber looked empty as we entered it, and my eyes searched the corners. One was too dark to make anything out.

"Wait here," I hissed, and took a few quiet steps into the room. I could see nothing of interest, and my eyes stayed focused on the shadows. One didn't seem quite right. I heard a vague snuffling, and froze.

_There's something there, alright. Could be asleep, could be waiting. _I held my blaster tightly, and slowly drew my vibroblade out with my other hand. As I gingerly moved closer, the shadows transformed into a sleeping rakghoul. _Best to kill it silently, if possible. _I took another step, lifted my blade, and threw it at the slumbering body.

A cut-off wheeze. I smiled to myself, and retrieved the weapon.

"Come on," I whispered to Mission.

"Nice aim, but wouldn't a blaster have been easier?" she queried.

"I was going for the silent kill." I responded quietly. "Perhaps it was a bit show-off of me, though."

She giggled softly in agreement.

We headed down the next corridor, alert for noise and movement. It was eerily empty, but I could still hear the grunts up ahead.

"That doesn't sound like rakghouls," I observed.

"No, it's the Gamorreans," Mission told me.

I nodded to myself. "How many were there?"

"Four, I think. I didn't really have time to count y'know," she replied tartly.

_Four. _I had a vague memory of Gamorreans; semi-intelligent beasts that could speak and trade, on a fairly basic level. "How were they armed?"

"Axes, swords."

_Damn. Oh well, here's hoping we see them some distance away. _

We reached the end of the corridor, which tapered off into two closed doors. I heard the grunts coming from the left, and tensed. _It's times like these I'm really glad I'm a thief. _I smirked as I grabbed a frag grenade out of my pack.

"Ready?" I whispered softly. "I'm going to open the door and throw a grenade. After the blast, I'll charge on in with my blade. Back me up with a blaster."

"Yep," Mission sounded like she was trying hard to remain confident, optimistic.

My shoulders knotted, and I forced myself to stay calm. _Use the Force. _No, I couldn't lose control in front of Mission. With a deep breath, I primed the grenade, and switched open the door. I mentally counted four hog-like faces as I lobbed the grenade in the centre of the room, and slammed my hand back against the controls. The door slid shut; a Gamorrean yelled in surprise, and then I heard the loud explosion as the grenade detonated. The noise numbed my ears; the door vibrated against my hand.

The Gamorreans were squealing in pain; I flicked the door open once more and barged into the room, vibroblade whirling.

Three of them were down, stunned, and I let Mission finish them off as I faced the last one. He grunted abuse at me and charged. I felt my hand raise of its own volition, and static rose the hairs along my arm. _No, I will not use the Force! _

I ducked and rolled under the swing of his axe, and jabbed my blade into the back of his leg, severing the muscle. He screamed in pain, dropping to his knees. His armour was poor quality; my blade stabbed right through into his chest.

A click, and Mission appeared, hovering over the last Gamorrean she had killed. She was panting; adrenalin and fear fighting for command of her expression. _She's not used to killing at all, _I realized, _despite her life on the streets._

A loud roar from a neighboring room made us both look up.

"That's Big Z, Jen!" Mission said excitedly. "We did it!" She rushed to the door, and started fiddling with the lock.

I could only grin at her. _Finally, I've done something right._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_snackfiend101 - You're right, dunno where that came from. Sounds a bit odd and out of place too. It's now removed anyway. Cheers for the continued encouragement!_

_Data() - thank you, I hope you keep liking it!_


	10. Rescue

_**Disclaimer - see chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Ten - Rescue**

_- Zaalbar -_

* * *

The metal clawed into my fur. Resolutely, I ignored the pain and tried once more to yank the thick chains apart. They would not yield, no matter how I struggled. 

_I will not be a slave; not if I have to fight until my last breath! _Slavers deserved to die, all of them. Capturing those less fortunate, and using them like dumb animals. I'd fight against these rabid kinrath with all of my will; I'd done so before. But that brought up painful memories.

_No, thinking about what cannot now be changed is fruitless. _I must be strong; I must escape. _Who else will look out for Mission, if not me? _I continued straining at the chains around my wrists. _If ever I needed your skills, my rambunctious young friend, it is right now. _

She was the only one who accepted me for what I was; the only one who did not judge me for my past. _Such a bright, mischievous cub. _Who else would keep her from the trouble she always sailed head-first into? Zaerdra would endeavor to, yet her efforts did naught but spur Mission on. _Just tell me that she is safe; that she found a way to escape._

I gritted my teeth, and pushed such sentimental thoughts aside. _Not the time to reflect upon such matters. I must find a way to break free first. _The room was small, and smelt like rotting corpses. I'd tried bashing the door down on numerous occasions, but it held firm. Hunger gnawed at my insides, and I realized that soon the Gamorreans would be back to sedate and then transport me. _I shall not let them!_

And yet already I heard the grunts of my captors - they were returning. It sounded like less of them this time. I did not understand their language, and was glad of it.

They stayed outside of my prison, snorting at each other for some time. Desperation creeped insidiously into my furious resolve; I could feel myself turning despondent. No matter how hard I tried, I could not even bend the thick metal clamped around my wrists.

A rumbling blast from outside hammered at my ears; caught unawares, I staggered backwards and crashed against the side of my cell. The walls were vibrating with aftershocks. _What was that? _I could hear pained squeals from the Gamorreans. _They are under attack? _A confused howl ripped itself from my lungs.

Deadly silence followed in its wake. I lurched off the wall and kept my eyes trained on the closed door – whatever had happened, might still be to my detriment. I could no longer hear the Gamorreans.

A minute later the door swung open. Stunned relief flooded through me as Mission's happy face peeked into the room. Her eyes lit up as she spotted me.

"(Mission!)" I cried in utter shock. _She's alive! I am free!_

"Big Z!" She grinned happily and bounded inside, jumping up to hug me. Clumsily, I tried not to fall over. I was still not used to her effusive displays of affection. _She is safe! _And so was I.

"(Mission,)" I complained, as she continued clutching at me tightly. "(My hands are bound. But you are a sight for sore eyes, as the humans say.)"

"You didn't think I'd forget about you – Mission and Zaalbar, together forever!" she replied emotionally. Her big blue eyes were blinking at me. She stepped backwards and grabbed my paws, fiddling with the restraints. "Let me get those for you, Big Z. Phoaw, you smell!"

It was then that I noticed a human female had followed her in.

"(Who's that with you?)" I asked warily, eyeing over the newcomer. I did not like humans in general, and this one in particular raised the hackles on my neck. She was poorly dressed, but by stance alone I could tell she knew how to use the vibroblade she wielded. I wondered just how my young friend had managed to acquire her aid.

The stranger snapped her head up to look at me full on. She answered herself, in a stumbling growl I struggled to follow. "(My name is Jen Sahara.)"

Surprise swamped me, and I did not take my eyes from the human. "(You know the language of my people? That is rare among your species; I am impressed,)" I answered slowly. While the human's accent was atrocious, she could be understood, and I could not help but appreciate a human who bothered to learn Shyriiwook.

"Whoa!" Mission shot this Jen a speculative glance. "First Mandalorian and now Shyriiwook? You sure did learn a lot of weird languages!"

"(Weird?)" I grumbled.

Mission finished playing with the handcuffs, and they opened with a click. I rubbed my wrists thankfully.

"Well, y'know what I mean Big Z!"

"We should probably get out of here," the human said, switching back to Basic. She glanced back to the exit furtively. "There's still rakghouls crawling around."

"(I owe you a debt, Jen Sahara,)" I said solemnly. "(You and Mission together have saved me from a life of servitude and slavery.)"

"I didn't really do much," Mission chimed in. "I mean, I could never have got here without Jen."

"It's nothing; we made a deal," Jen said flatly.

"(A deal?)" I asked. A feeling of trepidation slowly uncurled in my stomach. Just what had Mission agreed to?

"Yeah, Jen needs my help to break into the Vulkar base," Mission added.

Alarm tensed my nerves; I felt my muscles bunching up in anger. "(No, Mission! We cannot go there, it's too dangerous!)" I demanded. Suddenly, I did not like the human so much.

"I have to, Big Z, I promised! And besides, she rescued you!" Stubborn indignation was something Mission did all too well.

"(I only need access to the entrance, Zaalbar. I do not wish Mission to accompany me inside,)" Jen told me in Shyriiwook. While her effort to speak so was valiant, she finished her sentence in a hacking cough, struggling to stop her eyes from streaming. I had to bite back a small chuckle.

"Hey, I'm quick and plenty smart! I can help!" Mission protested loudly over the human's coughing fit.

Jen raised a hand to quell Mission's impassioned plea. "I believe you Mission, but I don't wish Gadon for an enemy."

"Gadon? What's he got to do with this?" Mission demanded, folding her arms stubbornly.

The human shrugged at her. "I talked to him, like you suggested. He also warned me not to let you inside the base if I cared for my life."

"He threatened you?" Mission gasped. Her eyes widened, although I wondered why Mission was so surprised. Gadon might not be as... enthusiastic as Zaerdra, but he had always tried to look out for the young Twi'lek. _With all of us struggling to keep Mission from danger, it is a wonder how she always manages to elude safety. _One day, I was going to lock her in one of those Upper City apartments and throw away the key. It was unfortunate she knew how to pick locks.

"You could call it that." Jen was grinning impishly at Mission. _Humans are odd, _I reminded myself. _Why else would she find a life threat amusing?_

"Gadon's not running my life for me. I do what I want!" Mission declared hotly.

I groaned. Trying to talk reason to Mission was like taming a kinrath: dangerous and ultimately a waste of time. But I had to prevail. "(Mission, please, be sensible. I will help Jen inside the base, in return for her rescue.)"

Jen looked at me in surprise. "Thank you, Zaalbar. The help would be much appreciated."

"Oh, so you're going to take him along, and not me?" My young charge was getting angry. And stubborn. I would have a fight on my hands to talk her out of this.

"Mission, I do not want the Beks for enemies," Jen said wearily. "But we will need a lookout at the base entrance."

Mission sulked.

_It's a compromise, but I do not have to like it. _

"Please, Mission." Jen said softly.

"Fine," she muttered. "But only because Big Z would never let me hear the end of it!"

The human smiled warmly at Mission. "Alright, let's head back."

xXx

The journey to the outcast village was fairly uneventful. We ran into a few solitary rakghouls that were killed by Jen's blasters before they came close. I was beginning to respect the fighting abilities of the human; she was tough and capable. _She also made sure no harm came to Mission during the rescue attempt._ I would do my best to help her in whatever foolhardy plan she had inside the Vulkar base.

The villagers let us through the gates, and I noticed they seemed rather wary of Jen. Mission had told me Jen's human friend was hurt; healing inside the camp. I followed the females to the centre of the dark courtyard.

"You're back. I'm surprised you're not both dead," a male voice directed at Jen and Mission. I saw an injured human, tied up tightly to a pole. This was rather puzzling – I did not know the Outcasts imprisoned people.

"No faith in me?" Jen asked. I could hear the humour in her voice.

"You should have waited until I could help!" the man responded angrily.

"I would have asked you, but you seemed a little tied up."

Mission burst out laughing. _He is tied up. What is so funny?_

"Ha ha," the human male said coldly. "Care to get me out of this mess?"

"Well, you sound a lot better at any rate," Jen said mildly, stepping forward to start untying the ropes.

"Hey! You can't do that!" A female villager ran up to us. Jen whirled around to face the stranger, and the interloper took a few steps back hurriedly.

"Just watch me," Jen said menacingly. I could see rage on her face, and I tensed in wariness. Something about this human was a little... off. Mission looked alarmed.

"I – well, I guess we can tell he doesn't have the rakghoul disease anymore," the healer stuttered, backing away.

"You have the social skills of a rancor," the tied up human muttered. I saw amusement chase away the anger on Jen's face.

"Oh?" she responded, smiling mischievously. _She gets the same contrary look as Mission_. "You'd prefer me to leave you here?"

"No!"

Jen grinned, and finished untying the man. "Zaalbar, this is Carth." He nodded at me, and I returned the greeting. "Zaalbar's offered to help us break into the Vulkar base."

I grunted in confirmation. _I may not trust her, but I owe her that much. _

The man looked surprised. "Uh, well, I suppose we can do with all the help we can get."

"What do you guys want in there, anyway?" Mission piped up.

"Gadon's asked us to do something for him," Jen told her. I noticed the man named Carth glare at Jen. "What?" she snapped at him. "They're helping us, they deserve to know something."

"Lighten up, would ya Carth?" Mission said. "Jen's refused to tell me anything at all, other than you're a pilot."

"What?" Carth spluttered. He was still leaning against the pole, flexing an injured arm. It looked painful.

Jen groaned. "Thanks Mission."

"Oh. Oops." Mission giggled sheepishly.

The male human was glaring at Jen again. "I can't believe you, woman!"

"Right. I'm getting out of here," Jen stated baldly. "We can't go back to the Upper City with you in that state, Onasi, the Sith will get suspicious." I wondered briefly who Onasi was. Jen was still speaking, in a hurried monotone as if she wanted to get her piece out before anyone interrupted. "I think we should camp down here tonight, and hit the Vulkar base tomorrow if you're up to it. Zaalbar, do me a favour and make sure Carth doesn't leave? He really needs to rest and recuperate tonight."

"Don't think you can order me around, missy!" Carth yelled, his brows lowering.

Jen ignored his protests, facing me as she spoke. "He's hurt, and grumpy. The last thing he needs is to be moving about."

I eyed the injuries I could see. Most had been bandaged, but judging by the way Carth was balanced against the wooden pole, he looked to be in a lot of pain. He was favouring his left side, and could not stand up straight. Kolto had some instantaneous effect, but injuries as severe as his would need at least a night's rest to heal considerably. _Jen Sahara speaks sense._

"(I will do as you ask, Jen Sahara.)"

"Hey! What did you just say?" Carth demanded of me.

Mission started laughing again. "He said that if you even think about moving, he's gonna wallop ya one! And Big Z always says what he means, so you'd better get comfortable for the night, Carth!"

"(Mission, you are making my words sound stronger than they are,)" I complained.

"(It's the only way he'll listen,)" Mission responded in Twi'leki.

"I'll be back later," Jen muttered, and dashed off.

"Where are you going now, you reckless woman?" Carth shouted after her, and made to follow. I walked in front of him and barred the way. He scowled furiously at me.

"(It is for your own health, human,)" I tried to explain.

"If I wasn't so hurt, I'd take you on, Wookiee." he muttered at me.

Mission guffawed in disbelief. "I'll go after her," she said brightly, "see you guys later!"

"(Mission!)" I lamented loudly. She had already run ten paces. "(Get back here!)"

She flashed me an impish grin. "No, you promised to look after Carth! I won't be long!" With that, my roguish young friend turned tail and ran after Jen.

I howled in frustration.

"Yeah," Carth muttered next to me. "I know exactly how you feel."

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_snackfiend101 - hehe yeah, I'm trying hard to keep the three personalities show through, with one of them being more dominant depending on the situation/her mindstate etc. Glad you think its working :)_


	11. Reflections and shadows

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Eleven – Reflections and shadows**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

Depression weighed down on my soul as I gulped another swig of Tarisian ale. Mission had disappeared into the pazaak room beyond, and I'd leapt at the opportunity to finally imbibe some much-needed alcohol. _I'd like to see you try and stop me boozing now, flyboy._ Unfortunately, rather than relaxing my tense nerves, the alcohol seemed to be sinking me into introspection – what I'd been avoiding ever since I woke up with a splitting headache and multiple personalities. 

I was almost totally convinced that neither Jen nor Evil Bitch were really me. But the detail with which I could recall studying, the days spent poring over electronic databases and archives, convinced me that Jen must be real, somehow. _I can see my father's face so clearly. He scares me; he protects me. _Not my father... her's.

Evil Bitch's identity, in contrast, was more just a mass of seething emotions; rage, a lust for power, hatred, and at times, grief. But the feelings were so strong, so poignant almost, that they must belong to me. _Or to someone._

If a stranger asked me to describe my personality, I'd like to say I was confident, cheeky at times; quick to anger, but quick to forgive. Perhaps with an inclination for trouble, and perhaps rash at times; but overall a person with a good heart. _That description is about as far off Jen or Evil Bitch as possible._

I sighed morosely, and took another swallow. My glance caught on the mirror behind the bar, and I latched onto my own reflection. _Curly dark hair, cropped short. Green eyes, high cheekbones. A fairly normal looking woman, really. Might be called attractive, but definitely not a holovid star. _Was that face really mine?

I downed the remainder of the glass, and ordered another. A hopeful Twi'lek tried flirting with me, but disappeared after I threatened to tie him to the ceiling fan by his headtails. _I just want to be with myself. Whoever that is. _

I continued drinking, and my thoughts became a little woozy. _I wonder who this face belongs to... doesn't look freaky enough to be Evil Bitch. _I giggled. _I bet she's really ugly._

I finished the next glass, and rested my head on the damp bar. My eyelids drooped closed, but I was still thinking about my own features. _I've never been vain; I've never obsessed about my appearance before. Have I?_ A comforting sense of tiredness conquered my wayward thoughts, and I let them slide away into oblivion.

…

_I could smell the fritla blossoms as I knelt next to the river. _I love spring. Everything comes back to life._ The afternoon was mine to do with as I wished; I had completed all of Father's chores, and he hadn't wanted me at home with the Minister around. Mother warned me not to anger him by running off, so I just went to my usual spot. _The beautiful river. _Even if it was a man-made canal, I still loved it._

_My reflection smiled shyly back at me as I leaned over the bank. Wavy dark hair framing hazel eyes. _I wish I didn't have freckles. I wish I was pretty_. Although, Father told me to be glad I was plain, for beautiful girls attract the attention of troublesome boys. And I certainly didn't want that._

_"Jen!" A masculine voice called out, irritated. I jumped to my feet, a little fearful. _Better run, Father wants me.

…

_The cold stars in the distance winked at me as I stared through the ship window. I scowled to myself. _Almost back in known world. We'll build a better galaxy than those morons_. Amazing how the anger had not left me, all this time later. If anything, it had strengthened. _They never taught us that, no; they wanted to control us. _Didn't want us to realize the sheer power in embracing one's emotions._

_I caught a glint of my own face on the window, and I stared at it absently. A white flaky complexion surrounded by greasy lank hair. Two eyes as black as space. _Good thing I never cared for how I looked. _I grinned evilly at myself. _And it always helps if you appear intimidating. _A beep on the console distracted my thoughts._

Time to get back to business._ I whirled around, and strode back into the command center._

…

_I searched the edges of the cracked mirror. _Gotta be a safe in here somewhere._ My reflection frowned back in concentration as I ran my fingers behind it. I grinned impishly as I felt the catch. _Easy target, easy credits.

_I paused, and stared into my own eyes before lifting the mirror. _I don't look too bad. I wonder if he'll ever see me differently? _I'd never particularly cared how I looked; dark curly hair, green eyes, olive skin; the fact that I was healthy and had all four limbs was enough to keep me happy. _But lately... _I scowled at myself. _Great time for vanity, in the middle of a heist. Stupid, get back to work!_ I clamped down my thoughts determinedly, and started dismantling the safe._

…

"Jen? Hey Jen!" A young voice cracked through my swirling dreams. "Wake up! Geez, never took you for a drinker!"

My cheek was glued to something. As I slowly prised open a sticky eye, I saw a blue grinning face tilted to one side. _Oh. My face is stuck on the bar._ I groaned, and pulled it up.

"Ugh," I moaned.

Mission laughed. "Wow, you musta' bin busy while I was pulling in the credits! Heh, I bet your grumpy friend isn't going to be too happy with you."

Reality sank slowly into my consciousness. "He doesn't need to know," I mumbled. "I need some sleep."

"We should head back to the others," Mission agreed. "But can you walk? You're as drunk as a spacer on lockdown!"

_Whatever that is. _"I can walk, just watch me," I grumped determinedly, sliding to my feet. I squeezed my eyes shut as dizziness set in. I heard Mission giggle.

"Laugh at me, would you?" I murmured. "Bet I could drink you under the table."

She sniggered loudly. "Says you now, when you're already sloshed."

"Mmmm," I replied, still with my eyes firmly shut. "Lead on."

"We'll go a different way, though," she said brightly. "I don't wanna run into any Vulkars, not with you in such a state." She giggled again. I opened my eyes to shoot her a filthy glare, but followed her anyway.

As we wandered through the grimy corridors of the Lower City, my head partially cleared. I hazily recalled the dreams I'd had, and it brought on another case of contemplation. _I look most like the street kid. My skin's not as tanned, but then, I've been indoors. I also look a lot older. _That'd make sense though, my vision of both Jen and Street Kid seemed to be when they were young teenagers. It was a lot harder to tell with Evil Bitch, whose dreams of power and grandeur seemed so far-fetched and delusional, that they were almost amusing. _If they weren't so violent, at any rate._

I sighed to myself, and shadowed Mission around the next bend. _That's it, then, isn't it? I must be Street Kid. Right? _

Theories swirled hazily through my head. _I still don't know why I have three identities, other than it has something to do with Bastila. _I seemed to know a little of the Force; perhaps I'd fought Evil Bitch. _Doesn't explain Jen, though. _Maybe I'd been a Jedi apprentice, who'd got dragged into a duel, and somehow Evil Bitch's memories, or soul, got trapped inside my own. _Bastila… Bastila must have done something. Something with the Force. _Perhaps Jen had also been involved. Maybe she'd been caught in the middle of a Jedi duel.

_This is getting me nowhere._

Bastila would have the answers, but did I really want to hear them? The bond had not yet returned, but the idea of it reappearing unnerved me.

_Do I really want to be anywhere near her?_

xXx

I woke up the next morning, groggy and nauseous. I vaguely remembered following Mission back to the outcast village. Our makeshift camp was really just shelter under a rat-infested building, but it was enough for me to sleep.

As I crawled to my feet, I noticed the others eating some sort of stew by the entrance. I wondered briefly where the food had come from; Onasi must have sweet-talked some of the villagers.

"Bet you're feeling awful today!" Mission exclaimed brightly. Carth frowned at me, and then turned away. Zaalbar grunted in acknowledgement.

"Mm, I've been better," I said noncommittally, ignoring the thumping in my head.

"Want some?" the Twi'lek offered. My stomach rumbled loudly, and I eagerly took a portion. I hoped it wasn't that awfully cheap reproduced gunk.

Carth was still injured, and by mutual consent we decided to wait another day before infiltrating the Vulkar base. Mutual, all apart from flyboy himself, who wanted to get it over and done with. _We have six days before the swoop race; five if we get the accelerator tomorrow._ To my surprise, Carth didn't argue too loudly. In fact, he seemed to be ignoring me. _I saved his life, and he's pissy with **me**? _Men.

I spent the day hanging around the Lower City. Mission tried to cajole me into a game of pazaak, and by the look on her face I surmised someone had told her about my awful last performance. _Thank you, flyboy. _I was vaguely aware that we were driving each other crazy. _It's a good thing Mission and Zaalbar are here to diffuse the tension, even if not for long. _I expected we'd part company after the Vulkar base raid.

I had a quick trip back to the apartment, picking up the few grenades I'd left behind. Hopefully I wouldn't be back; all going according to plan we'd acquire the accelerator, rescue Bastila, and then I'd be off. _I don't want to be around her. Just fulfill my deal with Onasi, and then disappear. _I wondered if it would be that easy. I quenched the traitorous voice that pointed out I'd already done enough by saving his life.

We were all kitted up and ready to go the next day. Zaalbar had vanished earlier, and reappeared with a vibroblade. Carth was still in pain despite his protestations to the contrary, but I doubted he'd listen to reason. _Besides, I want to finish this as much as he does._

Heading out into the Undercity compound, we ran into a few small groups of rakghouls. I stuck with my blaster, while Zaalbar charged in and dispatched them. He assured us that Wookiees could not get the rakghoul disease; I refrained from asking how he knew. The decomposing, fetid stench of the sewers swamped me as we entered, but it was becoming more bearable.

"So guys," Mission asked as we journeyed through a dank corridor. "What are we doing inside in the Vulkar base?"

"(You are not doing anything inside the Vulkar base, Mission,)" Zaalbar growled, prompting a sulky pout from the Twi'lek.

_They deserve to know, no matter what Onasi thinks. _"Gadon's asked us to destroy a prototype accelerator," I told her, my eyes searching the sewers for any hint of danger. I sensed Carth stiffen in annoyance next to me.

"Really?" Mission yelped. "I thought he was going to send some Beks after it!"

"I daresay we're more dispensable," Carth muttered.

"(That is a dangerous task. Gadon is doing something for you in return?)" Zaalbar queried.

"Yes he is," I confirmed. "But I shall say no more, in fear of flyboy's blasters."

I heard Carth growl under his breath, and grinned to myself.

We journeyed further into the sewers without incident. I noticed Zaalbar keeping an eye out for Gamorreans; he obviously felt the need for revenge. As long as there weren't too many, I was fairly confident we could handle them. _The four of us make a great team._

Eventually, we reached the forcefield Mission had told us about, and she switched on the controlling terminal, pulling a datapad out of her pocket. I walked closer and watched her hack into the system with admiration. _I've never been too skillful with computers; they don't seem to like me._ She entered a bunch of codes, and with a slithering hiss the shiny azure forcefield deactivated.

"Awesome," Mission murmured. "I've never got past here before."

"How long have you had the codes?" I asked, puzzled.

"Just before I met you guys," she grinned. "Lucky for you."

"Indeed." Carth muttered suspiciously. I rolled my eyes. _How can he be suspicious of **that?**_

A roar in the distance grabbed everyone's attention. I noticed warily that the walls shook slightly with the vibration.

"Alright, what on Hoth was that?" Carth asked.

"I dunno. You hear the roars sometimes down here, but I've never known what creates it," Mission answered meekly.

"Maybe it's the Vulkar door chime," I mumbled. Mission giggled.

Zaalbar and I led the group into the unknown. We reached a large chamber that was eerily empty. _I guess I was expecting more rakghouls. But if the Vulkar's control this section of the sewers, there really shouldn't be any._

My boots crunched on something, and I looked down. A pile of old bones, the final resting place of some poor sod. I crouched, and moved the rubble aside. _Hrm, a journal of some description. _The words 'Promised Land' caught my eye. _That's the second one I've found. Well, I suppose I could make a loony old man happy._

There were two exits, and we veered off to the north. _I think it's north, hard to get bearings down here. _Another long, empty, dark corridor. The creepy atmosphere seemed to have affected all of us; no one had spoken a word in quite some time. I wondered if I could hear faint munching noises in the distance, or if I was simply turning as paranoid as Carth.

The passageway emptied out into a large cavern, half of it in lightless shadow. I peered suspiciously at the far end of the catacomb; anything could be hiding there.

"There's something in the middle of the room," Mission murmured, walking towards a large pile of objects I couldn't quite make out. The rest of us followed her slowly.

Movement caught my eye; I turned to see a gigantic shadow enlarge from the darkened end of the room. I froze. _Nothing could be that big._

A deafening roar slammed into my eardrums, and the obscure shape lumbered towards us suddenly. Mission screamed and ran to the far side of the room. I caught a glimpse of her struggling with a door that did not budge. Zaalbar instinctively sprinted after her.

I stared at the oncoming mass in a sense of bewilderment and growing determination. _I will not flee! Nothing frightens me! _My throat clenched. _Run!_

I was yanked unceremoniously backwards as Carth fiercely grabbed my arm.

"Run!" he yelled desperately. That broke my trance, and the two of us bolted to the only other exit. Adrenalin surged through me; the beast howled in excitement. I could almost feel its hot, sticky breath brushing my neck. Carth reached the doorway, turning his head to scream at me. Another roar, and something whisked along my back, barely making contact. I stumbled. _I won't make it! _Desperation flooded my consciousness. _I need to move faster! _I screamed in anger, and jumped the last few metres.

The air around me stretched. I felt like I was suspended forever, and a faint buzzing noise tickled my ears. I hadn't thought my leap would carry me to the doorway, but now it seemed like I was going to crash into the wall beyond. I raised my hands belatedly.

As I collapsed into the wall, I heard a large smash. It took a dazed second before I realized the monster had swiped through the side of the door behind me. It roared in fierce anger. Stone and rubble erupted behind me, and I steadied myself abruptly. _That could have been bad._

I turned to see a horrifying sight. _That's a rancor, _a voice muttered detachedly. My eyes flicked to Carth, and I froze as I saw his crumpled form. _A rock must have hit him. _The rancor howled, and a claw bashed again into the crumbling wall. I jumped into action, dragging Carth further away from the gaping hole that had been a door.

_I just hope Mission got that other door open! _The passageway turned to the right, leaving us a safe distance from the rancor. _It won't be able to break in here. _It was growling in annoyance. I steadied my breathing, and quickly checked Carth's vital signs. _He's fine, just stunned. _He mumbled something.

I heard the rancor stumble away. _I'd better have a look for the others. _I flicked on the stealth belt Mission had lent me, and crept back towards the chamber.

It roared again from further back in the room as I reached the entrance. Mission shrieked, and Zaalbar yowled in response. _Oh no. _I ran a few steps hurriedly, and spotted them. Trapped in a corner, with Zaalbar standing protectively in front of Mission.

_They're going to die._

"Come back here, you filthy beast!" I shrieked, running into the room.

_I can't let them die._

_If they can't take care of themselves, they deserve to die for their weakness._

_I must get out of here! This is too terrifying!_

_I can't let them die._

I growled angrily. "Turn around, you flea-bitten kath pup! Are you too scared to face me?" I had no idea where the words were coming from. The rancor ignored me and advanced on the others.

I screamed loudly to get its attention. It took a step closer to Zaalbar, and he jumped backwards.

My eyes caught on a fist-sized rock, and I scrabbled to pick it up. I hurled it with all my might, and watched numbly as the rock bounced harmlessly off the rancor's back. The rancor lurched within swiping distance of the Wookiee.

"(Run, Mission!)" he yelled desperately.

"I can't!" she sobbed.

_Speed._ Desperation laced my steps as I sprinted towards the creature, drawing my blade as I ran. Everything around me lengthened. Each step took an eternity, but the others appeared frozen in time. The rancor had a claw upwards, the start of a killing blow to Zaalbar. A long, deep scream erupted viciously from my lungs as I hurled my vibroblade at the rancor's ankle.

With a soundless snap, my surroundings clicked back into place. Reality shortened.

The rancor screeched and turned around to face me.

"Run!" I bellowed hoarsely.

The others gathered their wits, and made a dash for the exit. The beast shook his leg in annoyance, and my vibroblade went whirling into the dark. I resisted the insane urge to go and collect it

The creature drew itself up to its full height, the top of its head brushing the ceiling of the extensive cavern. It roared in anger, huge red eyes glinting with madness. Focused solely on me. Terror tightened my limbs, as I stared in stunned shock at the monster. A small voice whispered, _bring it on! _I could vaguely hear screaming from the recesses of my fragmented mind. The rancor crouched back onto its massive limbs, preparing for the kill. _Get out of here! _I twisted on the spot, and sprinted for my life.

The beast lumbered after me, bellowing in anger. _Here we go again. _My muscles pulsed and burned. _Use the Force once more! _I saw Mission and Zaalbar sprint into the broken doorway, and out of sight. I reached out mentally and harnessed the power again.

The rancor smashed head first into the broken doorway, and helped propel me around the corner. The foundations of the sewers seemed to be rumbling in discontent as the monster howled and tore through ancient stonework. My vision was speckled and mottled; my lungs scorched as I panted.

_Well, that was fun. _I tried desperately to control my breathing as I caught up to the others. _I could have killed it, no pathetic rancor frightens me! _I closed my eyes. _I was pretty frightened, alright._

"Jen!" Mission sobbed, and clutched onto me. I tensed, and fought down my instinctive anger, disentangling myself. "I thought it got you!" she wailed.

"I think it almost did," I muttered.

"Whatever possessed you to run back in there?" Carth was awake, and speaking in a very quiet voice.

"Just my daily dose of lunacy," I quipped. Normality was slowly seeping back into my bones.

"(You have saved my life again, Jen Sahara. And now Mission's, as well.)" Zaalbar walked up to me.

I shrugged. Gratitude was not something I particularly wanted. "Forget it," I mumbled.

"(I cannot. You put your own life in jeopardy twice to save mine. There is only one way I can repay such an act: I will swear a lifedebt to you.)"

I froze; my muscles clenched in surprise. _A lifedebt? _I felt like the rancor really had walloped me. It was still roaring furiously back in the chamber. _Hey, a Wookiee slave, that could come in handy. _I swallowed. _I don't want anyone around; just finish the quest and get out of here. _I heard Mission squeak in surprise. _But Zaalbar is such a nice guy. What's a lifedebt?_

"A lifedebt?" Mission whispered. "Are you sure about that, Big Z?"

"A what?" Carth sounded puzzled. _Flyboy should learn Shyriiwook._

"(This is an issue of great importance to me, Mission,)" Zaalbar rumbled. "(Jen Sahara has twice now saved my life; once from slavery which I consider worse than death. She has also rescued you, when I could not.)"

"Wow – this is major." Mission turned to face me. "Do you realize what this means?"

"(I do not need this, Zaalbar,)" I told him seriously.

"What are you all talking about?" Carth asked in irritation. "And Jen, do you realize how awful you sound when you growl and moan at Zaalbar like that? I suppose you learnt Shyriiwook during your study as well?" he ended sarcastically.

Zaalbar bellowed at Carth, who glared in response.

"(Nevertheless, Jen Sahara, it is my decision. You have kept Mission from harm, and saved me twice from death.)"

"But I do not know where I shall be going! I don't know what my future holds." I was aware my voice sounded a little desperate. Carth looked at me strangely.

"(Then I shall follow, and endeavour to help you.)" Zaalbar took a deep breath. "(In the presence of you all I swear my lifedebt. Forever after I will be by your side, Jen Sahara. My honour and my strength are yours. May my vow be as strong as the roots of the great wroshyr trees of Kashyyyk.)"

My head had bowed during Zaalbar's speech, whether out of dismay or respect I could no longer tell. _The vow is done now; Zaalbar cannot take it back. I should at least accept it graciously._

"(I am honoured to accept your vow, Zaalbar.)"

"You know this is a sacred, irreversible vow?" Mission interrupted. I nodded at her, and she continued. "I guess this means you're stuck with me, too. Wherever Big Z goes, I'm going. I almost lost him once - it's not gonna happen again."

I blinked. _Well, if I get the walking rug, I may as well take the snot-nosed brat along as well, _I thought sourly. _Damn, Onasi's going to have a fit._

"Stuck with...? Just what's going on?" Carth had folded his arms, scowling thunderously at us all.

"Geez, Carth, you're so slow!" Mission rolled her eyes. "Big Z's just sworn a lifedebt to Jen. So I guess we're all one big happy family now!" She beamed.

I felt slightly nauseous.

"Family?" he echoed weakly. He blinked at me. "Lifedebt? Why?"

"While you were snoozing, Jen ran back in and saved our lives!" Mission enlightened him. "We'd have been Mr Rancor's dinner if not for her!"

Carth's mouth dropped open, and he stared in confusion at me. _Heh, I think I worry him when I do the nice thing. _"Oh," he said quietly, his dark eyes searching mine.

I turned away. "Let's go find that Vulkar base, it can't be far. I want to find out which gang member had the bright idea of using a rancor as a guard."

_And then I'm going to castrate him._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Firera - Thanks :)_

_snackfiend101 - Cheers, I'm trying hard to portray everyone correctly, glad you think its working! Strangely enough, I'm having the hardest time with Mission, who I thought would be pretty easy... ahh well. As for the Council... well, you might have to wait a wee while :grin:_

_Brynn - Mmm I always felt like having Zaalbar swear a life debt after the Gamorreans was just a little too convenient. I mean, Revan wasn't the only one who had a hand in saving his life - and she was partly doing it to get to the Vulkar base. Partly. Anyway, you're right, she really could do with a Wookiee friend, so..._


	12. A deal

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twelve – A deal**

_- Mission Vao -_

* * *

It seemed like I'd been waiting there forever. I couldn't even hear blaster shots or screams any longer. _I could go in, and see if they're alright_. No, I'd promised. 'Sides, I liked Jen, and I didn't want to get her in any trouble. _It's not like Gadon would kill her or anything, not if I talked to him._

I'd given Jen the energy shield I'd picked up earlier in the Undercity, but I hoped she wouldn't need it. _Breaking into a Vulkar base is kinda suicidal. 'Specially since she's minus a 'blade 'til she picks one up. _And if something happened to Zaalbar, I didn't know what I'd do.

A Vulkar had run past me earlier, back into the sewers. I'd kept my stealth belt on out of habit, but I doubt he'd have seen me anyway. _He looked like he'd peed in his pants. _I wondered briefly whether he'd catch up with the rancor.

The rancor brought to mind Big Z's lifedebt. _Whoa, that is huge. _It had me excited too, because I had a feeling Carth and Jen weren't going to be sticking round on Taris forever. _Carth's gotta tell us what's going on now; we're part of it!_

I figured since we were now all in it together, I should be with the others. _I've been out here long enough. _I knew Zaalbar would kill me if I ventured inside the base, though. _Maybe I'll just tail them with my stealth belt on. That way, no one will ever know, including Gadon!_

I grinned to myself, and took a stealthy step inside the doorway.

The base seemed fairly deserted, though I could hear a couple of patrol droids a few rooms away. _I'd better be careful – they can spot stealth fields. _

The base itself had a similar feel to it as the Bek headquarters, but I had no idea where the others had got to. I'd heard blaster shots when they'd first left me, which had petered away into silence after a few minutes. _I could do with the schematics to this place. _Hrm, now that wasn't a bad idea. _If I can find a terminal to hack into, I could probably access the security cameras as well. _I grinned excitedly.

I was creeping down a corridor when a patrol droid cleared the corner up ahead. I ducked into a nearby doorway, heart pounding. _That was close. _I heard the whirring of machinery as it passed, and looked around the room I'd entered. _Looks like some sort of maintenance room. _Piles of broken blasters and swoop bike parts littered the floor. A workbench crowded with tools and half-finished weapons dominated the far end. A terminal sat on a desk next to the workbench.

_Jackpot. _I scurried over, and flicked on the screen. _It's an old Senturi system, I'm surprised the Vulkars haven't updated it. _Tapping a few keys, I ventured to the login screen. _This is no match for me, _I thought smugly, inserting a security spike into the bypass slot. I quickly hacked a backdoor route into the core system. _Nothing like full access. _I was searching through the main commands, when a loud siren pierced the air. I jumped in fright, and couldn't stop a small squeal from escaping.

_Bantha crap! Was that me? _My fingers flew over the keyboard as I searched desperately for security functions.

**Alarm activated by unauthorized access. **

I felt a trail of perspiration tickle my cheek. _Me? Unauthorized access? I'm not the one charging in, guns blazing! _I tapped into the alarm administration, and hurriedly tried to terminate it.

A few seconds later, and silence descended on the base. _Please, let people think that was just a false alarm. _I turned to face the door, listening intently for any sounds. I thought I could hear a faint yell in the distance, but nothing close by.

_Phew! Well, while I'm logged in... _I turned back to the terminal and accessed the security cameras. Most of the rooms were empty, save for a few corpses. _Guess they went that way, then. _I briefly unlocked the armoury while I was at it.

I switched to the elevator cameras, and havoc met my eyes. Turrets were firing at three figures, who were stuck between the guns and a mob of sentients. One of the figures looked distinctly tall and hairy. _They're trapped! _How the Vulkars had caught them in front of the guns I didn't know, but it didn't seem like they could hold out any longer.

_I must do something! They'll die otherwise! _Turrets... I quickly switched to the gun access control.

**Turrets deactivated.**

I watched the screen tensely.

Half a minute later, and they ran around the corner. I saw a large flash of light encompass the pursuing mob. _Grenades. Good one, Jen! _

I searched the terminal intently for any survivors, and saw only one Vulkar struggling to get back on his feet. Jen's head reappeared through the doorway. She quickly scanned the room, shot the sole remaining survivor, and then vanished.

_She scares me like that. I know it's better to be safe, but sometimes Jen can act so bloodthirsty._ I guessed battle rage must get to her; she was really nice otherwise.

I decided it was time to catch up with them, so quickly tied up loose ends by deactivating the patrol droids and taking a good look at the base layout. _Amazing what a computer can do._

I snuck back out and proceeded cautiously to the elevator room, keeping an eye out for survivors. I didn't come across any, but I did notice some of the corpses still had credits in their pockets. _Never turn down easy money._

I made it to the elevator, stepping over Vulkar bodies as I passed. _I wonder just how close the others were to dying. _I shivered briefly. It had looked pretty grim, from the terminal.

The thought of that incident made me realize they might still be in trouble. _They might need my help. _I raced down to the lower level of the Vulkar Base. Broken droids and smoke greeted me.

_Geez, what happened now? _I walked through the clouds of steam, scouting around for any movement. _Nothing here. Where are they? _I crept onwards, further into Vulkar offices. Dead gang members met my eye. I heard voices, and a distant grumble. _Big Z!_

I dashed into the next office, and saw all three of them, standing over a pile of corpses. I grinned stupidly.

"Crazy stupid reckless woman," Carth was muttering under his breath. He was clutching his side. I noticed blood splattered all over Jen's armour.

"(You continue to surprise me, Jen Sahara,)" Zaalbar rumbled.

Jen crouched down in the corner, examining something. I tilted my head to the side. _That looks like the swoop part. Wow, they actually found it!_

"Do you think this is it, guys?" Jen asked.

"(I do not know.)"

Carth walked towards Jen. "Looks like an accelerator of some description. Grab it, and let's get out of here."

Jen grunted as she attempted to lift it.

"(Let me carry it. It will not be a burden to me, Jen Sahara.)"

Jen nodded in acknowledgement to the Wookiee, and turned towards the doorway. I took a hurried step backwards. Her eyes seemed to widen, but I wasn't sure. _Nah, she couldn't have seen me. This belt fools everyone. _A look of incredulous disbelief passed through her green eyes. _Aww, crap, she spotted me. Please don't tell Big Z! _I quickly vanished out the doorway.

"It was pretty lucky how the turrets turned off like that, don't you think?" Jen was saying in a considering tone as she exited the room.

"Luck follows you around like fleas on a bantha. How you manage to survive daily is beyond me," Carth was still grumbling. _He needs a vacation, or something. He's as grumpy as Zaalbar on a diet._

Jen laughed in response to Carth. I was behind the three of them, and saw Carth scowl at her.

"Lighten up, Onasi," she said mildly.

"Lighten up? You just stormed a whole room of Vulkars in a crazy rage!" He sighed. "Look, I know you're good Jen. You have the skills of an elite commando, and your speed in battle is more than impressive. But luck, and luck only, has stopped you from dying multiple times since I've met you! It's driving me crazy."

"(Carth Onasi is right,)" Zaalbar agreed. I blinked in surprise. _Sheesh, she must have done something nuts for Big Z to speak up. _"(You should have waited for us. I cannot protect you if you run off.)"

"I've survived this long without anyone protecting me!" Jen flared. _I know what she means. Though I never thought I'd see the day when Zaalbar tries to coddle her!_

"(You have said we are on a quest, together. That means we should help each other. If you run off, you endanger the whole mission.)" Zaalbar paused for a minute. "(I am sorry, Jen Sahara. I should not lecture you so. But you are headstrong, and I worry you will get into danger where I cannot be of assistance.)"

"I don't know what the Wookiee just said, but considering your reaction, I'm with him," Carth cut in.

Jen laughed suddenly. I was surprised at the quick change from anger to humour. "Okay, okay, guys. You're right, and I'm wrong. Let's hope this is the last battle of our little quest. I'm just glad Mission wasn't here."

I stiffened. _Glad I wasn't here? Everyone underestimates me, it's not fair! _I realized belatedly that Jen had already spotted me. _Oh, she's just trying to make me feel guilty. _I grinned to myself. _Fat chance._

"(I am glad, too. Mission is too quick to jump into danger. She is like you, Jen Sahara.)" _Bah! Probably why I get on with her so well. But it's not like I jump into danger that much, really. Big Z just needs to loosen up, is all._

"How are we getting out of this place, anyway?" Carth asked. "I don't fancy heading past that rancor again."

"There's a stairwell to the Lower City, I believe," Jen murmured. "It's on our way back to Mission. We should check it out."

A brilliant idea came to me, and I could feel a wicked grin forming on my face. I had seen the Lower City exit on the schematics. I left the others, cutting a shorter route to the stairwell. _Just make sure there are no guards. _I climbed the stairs quietly and switched open the door, pressing myself surreptitiously against the wall as it opened. The dingy loft of the Lower City greeted me, deserted and dark. I walked out nonchalantly and slouched against a pillar, waiting for the others.

They arrived a few minutes later.

"Looks like the Lower City to me," Jen commented. "Suppose we'd better go back to pick Mission up." Amusement coloured her tone. _She thinks I'm still behind her. Hah, I can fool even you, Jen!_

"Don't bother," I said brightly, flicking my belt off. "I'm right here."

"What the-"

"(Mission!)" Zaalbar roared, pushing past Jen to confront me. He was still lugging that accelerator. "(How did you get here?)"

Jen had a look of astonished respect on her face; Carth simply appeared dumbfounded.

"I figured you guys would check out this place first. I reckoned it would be nice of me to meet ya here."

"How'd you get past the rancor?" Carth asked in disbelief.

"(Mission, you promised not to move!)"

Jen just threw her head back and laughed in delight.

"I did not promise!" I crossed my arms, and scowled at Zaalbar. "I promised not to go into the Vulkar Base, and that's a completely different thing!"

Jen smirked at me, but held her tongue. _She's not gonna rat on me. _

"Between you and Jen, it's surprising I haven't turned grey," Carth muttered.

I squinted at him. "I'm sure I can see some white hairs, old man."

Jen snickered. Carth rolled his eyes at me. "Smart-mouthed brat," he grumbled.

I poked my tongue out, and immediately regretted it. I was really trying hard to stop that habit.

"Come on guys, lets go see Gadon." Jen interrupted.

I nodded at Jen. _If we hang around here any longer, some Vulkars are bound to turn up. _'Sides, I wanted to get moving, before Zaalbar started yelling at me again.

xXx

"So, you guys gonna spill before we see Gadon, or what?" I demanded, as we crossed into familiar territory. I felt a bit uneasy at the Vulkar end of the Lower City, but Central was home.

"We're all a team now, right?" Jen posed that to Carth, more as a demand than anything else.

"I... suppose."

"Gadon's offered to sponsor us in the swoop race, in return for the accelerator," Jen began, but I cut her off excitedly.

"Swoop racing? Awesome! Wow, Jen, you're a swooper?"

"Um, I-"

"I always wanted to enter, but Zaerdra will never let me. Too young, she says, but hah! I can beat nearly all the Beks on the practice track!"

"I-" Jen stopped walking, and turned to face me. "You can, huh?"

I nodded excitedly. "Yeah! I love swoop racing! I'd give away my stealth belt to compete, and let me tell you this didn't come cheap!"

Carth had stopped also, and was looking at Jen suspiciously. She was frowning in concentration. "Mission, do you think Gadon would let you race?"

"No way." I scowled angrily, remembering numerous arguments. "Zaerdra's got him convinced on an age limit. There was never one before I showed an interest! She thinks just 'cause we're the same species she can mother me."

"(That is because she worries. And people die from swoop racing.)"

"So?" I challenged. "There's only about one death a year!" I fell silent. _If only I could race! _I had a natural skill for swooping, I knew that much. _Gadon would happily sponsor me, if not for Zaerdra!_ It suddenly struck me as odd that Jen and Carth were entering the competition. _And Gadon made them go to an awful lot of effort just to race. Doesn't seem like him._

"Why do you guys want to enter, anyways?" I asked inquisitively.

"We want the prize," Jen said simply.

I wrinkled my nose. "Ew, a slave? You are going to set that person free, aren't you?" _Why would they want a Republic officer, anyway? _I remembered Jen's slip about Carth being a pilot. Everything fell into place, and I couldn't believe how stupid I'd been. My eyes widened in delight. "Wow, you guys are with the Republic, aren't you?" I whispered in awe.

Carth was looking ahead stonily; I guess he'd reconciled himself to Jen spilling the beans, but wasn't taking any part himself.

"I guess," Jen said weakly.

"(You are making a habit of rescuing people, Jen Sahara. You have a lot of honour.)"

"It's not something I want to do regularly, Zaalbar. After Bastila, I'm heading off this rock."

My head twitched up. _Bastila? Is that the name of the Republic Officer? _I was certain I'd heard it elsewhere. _The Sith! _"She's that Jedi the Sith are after!" the words burst out. Jen nodded at me. _Wow! What a quest!_ My thoughts reeled with possibilities, and I almost didn't notice when we reached the Bek base.

Jen and Carth hurried to meet with Gadon, and I lurked behind to catch up on the news. Zaalbar had disappeared in the direction of the Bek kitchenette, which didn't surprise me considering the ominous rumblings I'd heard from his stomach earlier.

When I strolled over to Gadon, I saw Zaerdra holding her blade fiercely and glaring furiously at Jen.

"Sheesh, where's the fire, Zaerdra?" I called. "You look ready to kill someone."

"I am not cheating you," Gadon was saying mildly to Jen, but his expression was tense. "At least grant me the bare courtesy of finishing before you yell at me. In my own base." Gadon inclined his head towards a group of armed Beks. Alarm jangled through me. _What did Jen say?_

Zaerdra turned towards me, her violet eyes boring into mine angrily. "(This human has no respect. If she threatens Gadon again, I will kill her.)" Her headtails were vibrating with fury.

"No! She saved my life!" I burst out. Zaerdra looked positively pissed that I'd responded in Basic._ As if I'd listen to her. 'Sides, Jen kept my secret._

Jen was glaring furiously, but calmed down somewhat when she glanced my way. She took a few deep breaths, and started talking in a controlled voice. "Gadon, I was under the impression I'd be using the accelerator in the race, in return for obtaining it. If I use one of your standard bikes I'll have no chance of winning. I thought that was the deal."

"The deal was that I'd sponsor you in the race," Gadon told her flatly.

"So you get what you want, but I don't get anything." Jen had crossed her arms, her tone had turned low and ominously quiet. Carth tensed, his eyes pinned on Zaerdra.

"(She is asking for trouble. I am quite happy to give it to her,)" Zaerdra growled at me. I saw Jen's eyes flick briefly over the Twi'lek.

"I have no use for a Republic officer," Gadon responded. "I had thought to turn her over to you, in return for what you have done for us, after the Beks win the swoop race. That was before you started threatening me." His expression was hard, unyielding. _I don't think I've ever seen Gadon this angry. Well, not since Brejik turned traitor, anyways._

"Jen," I decided it was time for everyone to chill out. "Don't get so tense – we're all friends here, right? Gadon's a good man, you can trust him. And Gadon, Jen may act a little grouchy, but she's really nice – she saved both my life and Big Z's!"

Everyone turned to stare at me in amazed shock. "What?" I said, a little defensively.

Jen laughed, her mood reversing abruptly. "You're right, Mission. I'm sorry Gadon, I guess I'm used to not trusting people." Carth shot her a wry glance.

Gadon nodded at her. "Apology accepted." He said no more.

"So," Jen began. "Is this our deal then? If a Bek wins, we get Bastila?"

"Yes," Gadon responded shortly.

"Okay," Jen said slowly. "Then why sponsor me at all?"

"For your sake, rather than mine," Gadon explained. "I don't trust Brejik to give his prize away quietly. The Beks are only there to win the race, and hence the loyalty of the undecided smaller gangs. If Brejik pulls something with Bastila – and I doubt he'll give up such a prize easily – then it's up to you whether you act on the scene. The Beks will not help – we do not wish to start a bloodbath."

Jen had crossed her arms and pursed her lips, obviously deep in thought. "Fair enough. If all four of us are there, then we could be ready for any stunts."

A look of unease crossed Gadon's lined face. "Only riders and mechanics are allowed on the swoop track. I'm afraid you'll be on your own."

Incredulity swamped Jen's face. "Oh, this will be fun," she muttered sarcastically.

Gadon suddenly smiled, humour lifting his previous sober expression. "I hope it will all go as planned. But I'm not fool enough to expect it. Now, you are welcome to stay at the Bek base for the next few days if you wish. But a warning – threaten anyone again and not only is the deal off, but you will be considered an intruder."

Shutters fell over Jen's face, but she nodded acceptance at Gadon.

"(I still do not trust her,)" Zaerdra muttered.

Jen turned to leave, and I pointed her towards the Bek kitchen. As we reached the doorway, Jen whirled around to grin impishly at Zaerdra.

"(See you later!)" Her accent was horrific, and she accompanied it with a cheeky wave. Zaerdra turned dark indigo in shocked outrage. I burst out laughing. _She knows Twi'leki as well?_

"You sound like a gizka, your accent is so bad," I giggled at Jen. She winked back at me.

Over a free meal in the kitchen, the four of us decided to take up Gadon's offer and camp out at the Base for the next few days. I was pretty excited to be watching my friend in the race, but I couldn't help a traitorous feeling of envy. _I could be good. _

I caught Jen alone later that day.

"Hey, I wanted to say thanks," I began. "I mean, for not telling Big Z that I was, y'know, in the base and all."

She smiled at me. "They didn't need to know. Between Zaalbar and Carth, it's pretty hard to have any fun around here."

I grinned mischievously at her. "Exactly! But anyway, I appreciate it."

"Hey, I knew something the others didn't. You saved our lives in there."

I blinked at her in surprise, and it took a moment until I understood what she was saying. "Oh! The turrets! Hey, I guess I did, didn't I?" We grinned at each other. After a moment, she motioned me away from the nearby Beks. I followed her curiously.

"Mission," Jen hissed. "You up for a prank?"

"Prank?" I perked up. "Sure! What?"

"Well." Uncertainty crossed her face. "I've never ridden a swoop before, Mission. I have no idea how."

"Oh." I shrugged. "Well, you only need to be there, right? Like Gadon said, you don't need to win. You can spend the next few days practicing; I can give you a few pointers!" I beamed in earnest.

"True, but to be honest I'd rather be concentrating purely on rescuing Bastila. I might need all my wits about me." Her green eyes stared at me, troubled and guarded. _Jen? Scared...? Nah. _"I just think it'd make sense to have a more, um, seasoned rider racing."

Exhilaration punched through my stomach. "You want _me_ to?" I squeaked. "How? They'd never let me!"

Jen grinned slyly. "We could switch on the day. I do need a mechanic, after all."

I glowed in elation, and grabbed her hand to shake it before she could even think about changing her mind.

"It's a deal!"

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Prisoner 24601 - Thanks for the encouragement - yep, I'm enjoying writing Carth more and more. Unfortunately it'll be a few chapters before I get back to him, the way I'm going..._

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_Feza - thanks:)_


	13. Race day

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen – Race day**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

The days before the swoop race passed slowly, and the sinking feeling of trepidation sat like a lead ball in my stomach. _I'm not scared of Bastila, I'm not! _What I wanted desperately was to be on my way – finished with the mission and everything to do with the Republic. But a confrontation with the very Jedi who was bonded to me, and possibly had something to do with my identity crisis, left me in a state where fear and anger battled constantly for supremacy. 

_It's not like the mind-link has come back. For all I know, she could already be dead. _Considering what I'd been through in the last week, I doubted I'd be that lucky. _Just rescue her, and then leave. Disappear. _I sighed to myself. _But what if she's able to help me? Jedi are meant to be good, right? _Could I trust her though? _Definitely, she's a Jedi! _I quenched that last awe-inspired thought, and reconsidered my options.

No, it was safer to run.

But the sinking thought kept returning: _Bastila is bonded to me. If she knows something about my identities, then will she really be willing to let me just leave? _My fists clenched. _I will not let some trumped up Jedi brat tell me what to do. _I closed my eyes. _Some trumped up Jedi brat who has a very powerful control over the mental side of the force. Why am I rescuing her again? _

At least I was starting to get some sort of handle on using the force. I'd drawn on it to increase my speed a number of times in the sewers, and could almost control it. It was the **almost** part that had me edging away from experimenting. _I slaughtered an innocent when both my fury and the force pummeling through my body combined._

A deadly combination.

I decided it was time to do something, before my emotions transformed into a killing rage. I snuck out the back entrance of the Bek base that Mission had pointed out earlier. Both Carth and the Wookiee seemed adverse to letting me venture out by myself. Fortunately, Mission was used to evading overprotective guards, and had for some reason taken a shine to me. _I don't know why. But I can't help liking that annoying little street punk myself._

I headed down to the Undercity, again using a back route the Twi'lek had shown me. _She certainly knows a few tricks. _The villagers spotted me with wide-eyed glances of alarm, and scurried off. For some reason, this increased my irritation.

I wandered around the dwelling absently until I spotted the loony old geezer, Rukil. His milky eyes squinted at me as I approached.

"Ahh! Our saviour returns! Have you found success upon your quest for the Promised Land?"

_Be nice. _"I found something of interest to you, old man." I pulled out the two data journals I'd discovered, and threw them at his feet. Rukil gasped, and scrabbled around in the dirt, clutching the datapads to his chest.

"It is as I feared, then," he mumbled as he peered closely at the first journal. "Malya is dead. But although I am saddened, there is yet hope in this discovery," he trailed off, and switched on the second datapad. I turned to leave.

"You have found my father's journal also! It is a miracle!" His voice turned rapturous. "You are truly marked as our saviour!"

"I am nobody's saviour," I said harshly.

"You are marked, up-worlder - even my dim old eyes can see the mantle of destiny that cloaks you. There is but one more journal left."

"I have already found you two. Get some other hero to find the third; I am not heading back into the sewers." With that, I turned on my heel and stalked off. _After all, two out of three ain't bad._

xXx

The day of the swoop race dawned. The wrist-comm. Carth had forced upon me sat heavy around my arm; I doubted I would need it. I had yet to discover exactly how Mission was planning to exchange places with the mechanic Gadon had assigned to me, but I expected she wouldn't let me down. _I hope not. I'm going to fall to pieces if I have to ride one of those fool bikes myself. _

"(May fortune shine upon you today, Jen Sahara,)" Zaalbar farewelled me as I followed the other Bek riders to the swoop track.

"Good luck," Carth said a trifle hesitantly. "I, uh, well. Good luck."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Got a speech impediment there, flyboy?"

He scowled angrily at me. "No. Look, I just wanted to say – thank you. For saving my life in the Undercity. I guess I got so grumpy with you afterwards that I never had a chance to say it."

I shrugged my shoulders uncomfortably. _I don't like gratitude. I don't deserve it. _I wondered where that thought had come from.

"Forget it," I said in a cold tone.

He frowned at me. "I can't. I'd be dead, if it wasn't for you."

"Yeah, well, you saved my life. We're even. Let me get you Bastila, and then I'll be out of your hair permanently." I strode off.

"Dammit, Jen!" he cursed after me, but I continued walking.

The group of Bek riders reached the mechanic bay, and Menila lead me to the swoop I was going to race. Menila was the Beks prime swoop racer; a tiny human whose slight frame concealed a wiry strength. She was the one chosen to race the experimental bike.

"Gadon will not be here on the track today," she told me quietly. "He does not wish a slaughter; and his presence may cause one."

I nodded at her, and eyed over the bike.

"So, where's my mechanic?"

"Jaz should be along any minute."

"Thanks, Menila. And good luck."

She smiled at me, and walked away. A minute later, a short figure in lime green fire-retardant synthetics and a customized matching helmet scampered up to me.

"I'm here, Jen!" the figure hissed. I turned to face Mission, and could not quite still the impish grin that crawled over my face.

"Nice helmet," I said sarcastically.

"It's the only way I could sneak in! Quick, let's duck into the workroom so you can change."

"I hope my clothes aren't that hideous colour," I muttered as I followed her.

Mission had acquired me a set of drab, grimy overalls, with a hood to shadow my face. I changed quickly, grimacing at the pungent smell of the worn clothing as I tugged it over my combat armour.

"I thought you were coming as my mechanic?" I queried.

"Nah, too tricky as Jaz was with some of the others. I jus' slipped a lil sedative into his caffa, and then faked a racing entry pass for one of the small gangs."

I couldn't help but respect the crazy girl. _She may be impulsive, but she sure can get results._

"So, where did you get this lovely pair of overalls?" I asked as I fastened the front.

"I just found them lying about," she answered innocently. _Lying about, eh? _I pulled the hood over my face, and my vision dimmed. A sense of familiarity niggled at me, but I couldn't figure out why.

"Let's go, Jen! Oooh, I can't wait!" Mission was practically hopping with excitement. I chuckled to myself, and the eerie feeling disappeared.

We headed back out to the swoops. I wondered briefly how Mission had managed to find a helmet that fitted over her headtails, but a black cloth attached to the back of it answered the mystery. Mission started drooling over the machinery.

"This is one of the souped-up speeders! Gadon did well by you."

"Even though Menila got the prototype accelerator?" I asked cynically.

"Well, yeah, but you can't blame him. Gadon needs to win this year."

The Bek racers were moving out to the track, and we joined them. No one paid us a second glance. As we approached the scene, my eyes flicked over the motley crowd. Vulkars outnumbered everyone, including the Beks, and a wary disquiet filled me. I spotted a number of other smaller gangs, but none were as prominent as the Beks or Vulkars. A cage gleamed at the side of the hangar.

"Wow, that's the Jedi?" Mission whispered quietly.

I stared at the prone form. A neural disruptor glinted. _So that's why. _Porcelain skin, voluptuous form, and dark hair. Scanty clothing. Darkness challenged me, and I was transported.

…

_A door opened, and I stood waiting, expectant. Three Jedi entered the room cautiously, and even from a distance I could recognize the leader: Bastila Shan._

…

"Jen, you okay?"

I blinked rapidly, shaking away the vision. "Yeah. Fine." _So we have met before. Was she a friend, or foe? _I nodded at Mission reassuringly. _Well of course we have. How else would the bond have been created? _Mission turned back to scan the crowd. _She should be dead. She will be dead! _I dragged my eyes away forcefully, and focused my thoughts upon that old tactical game I had once played. _I will rescue her, and then I will leave. _It had become my personal mantra. _I will rescue her, and then I will leave. _I just wish I knew how to accomplish that feat.

"I can't believe that a powerful Jedi could be so helpless, though," Mission commented softly.

Cloying tendrils of consciousness hooked into my mind. My own despair followed as I realized what it was. "She's not," I whispered. "Not anymore."

The bond was back.

Mission turned to face me, her helmet glinting light into my eyes. Before she could query me, another voice spoke.

"Jen, we meet again." A gruff, masculine voice. My head tilted to appraise Canderous Ordo. _He recognized me through this disguise? _I was impressed.

"Canderous Ordo, well met. I didn't know you were a swoop racer."

"I'm not." His lips curled at the thought. "My employer has an interest in Brejik's little toy." He indicated the caged Jedi.

_Oh great. I'm going to piss off a Mandalorian. _

A controlled flow of anger swept through me, and I sensed it coming from Bastila. Before I could reply to Canderous, the race announcer called over the hum of the crowd.

"The annual Taris swoop race shall now begin! Please collect your tickets from the race controller, and begin your heats when the number is called!"

"Wait!" a loud, aggressive voice sliced through the cheers. "Before this starts, there is one gang here that has illegal equipment, and therefore should be disqualified!" An armoured man strode belligerently in front of the announcer, cocky eyes scanning the crowd. _Brejik_

Angry voices muttered from the Bek racers. Canderous looked amused. I leaned over to Mission.

"Got your stealth belt on?" I asked softly. She nodded. "Good. Things could get ugly."

"The Bek racers are cheating! Investigate that bike, and you will find an illegal accelerator!" He pointed a gloved hand at Menila's bike.

"What? You mean the prototype you _tried_ to steal from _us_?" a Bek yelled out angrily.

"See!" Brejik demanded. "They admit their guilt!"

Several of the smaller gangs backed away to the edges of the track. Canderous crossed his arms and surveyed the scene with interest. My eyes stayed pinned to the Jedi. _**Patience. Wait for the right time.** _Was that my thought, or hers? _I hate this bond. _

"You're a liar, Brejik!" I recognized a Rodian in Bek colours shake his fist angrily at the Vulkar leader. That decided me.

"Mission, get out of here. Now," I commanded into her ear.

"But-"

"Turn your belt on, and scram." My voice was low, dangerous, demanding. She vanished suddenly, and I saw a blur back slowly out of the room.

"You lead your people well," Canderous remarked in surprise. My hand crept under the overalls to clutch a blaster. I mentally cursed the fact that I had not snuck a vibroblade in.

"You dare to question me?" Brejik's face was livid. "You festering scum! Vulkars, attack! Kill the Beks!"

"Everyone, to me! Show no mercy!" one of the more aggressive Beks yelled. I pulled out both blasters, and stood ready. Canderous was holding an impressive piece of machinery. _Looks like some sort of repeating blaster, but heavily modified. _I wondered which part of me could recognize weapons so readily.

The battle began, and many of the smaller gangs vanished. Some joined in, on either side. A Vulkar charged at me with a blade. I ducked, shot him twice, and relieved him of his weapon. My eyes caught a grenade thrown in my direction, and I jumped backwards. The ensuing blast knocked both me and the Mandalorian flat.

"Guess I'm on the Beks side then," Canderous laughed, pulling me to my feet. "For the battle!" he yelled.

I charged with him into a group of three snarling Vulkars. He took down two with his repeating blaster; I impaled the last.

"You fight well. A blaster and a blade together?" He grinned maniacally at me. I rolled my eyes. _Mandalorians_

Another two men charged us, screaming obscenities. I reached out to the force, and found it... missing. _What! What's going on? I thought I'd figured out how to use it! _I jumped sideways as one slashed at me, and shot him repeatedly. Canderous thumped the second guy.

A sense of purpose flooded through the bond, and I jerked my head up to see Bastila jump out of her cage, and mob the closest Vulkar. _Stupid girl, she's going to die! _She felt woozy, disoriented, and angry. I sensed her scrabble to hold onto the force, and push at someone weakly.

"No! The Jedi – get her!" Brejik screamed through the onslaught.

"Sithspit," I cursed.

Canderous eyed where I was looking. "You are after her as well."

I scanned the room urgently, and my eyes rested on Menila's swoop bike. _For lack of a better option..._ I sprinted through the chaos to the bike; ducking, dodging, and storming through duels.

_At least I was bright enough to let Mission show me how to turn these fool things on, _I thought grimly as I jumped on the bike, and discarded my vibroblade. I turned momentarily to pinpoint Bastila. Five Vulkars surrounded her. A fumbling attempt at scaring her enemies swam through the bond. _She's still weak. Her Force powers are not fully back yet. _

I heard Menila yell at me, and started the bike. One hand steering, the other firing. _No need to change gears just yet! _People jumped out of my way; others got clobbered and the bike shuddered in response. I accelerated into the mob of Vulkars threatening Bastila, and knocked two down as the bike skidded sideways to a halt.

"Jump on!" I screamed.

Bastila whirled to face me. Defiant anger melted into shocked horror. "You!" she gasped, her cheeks fading to a pasty white. With an admirable amount of self-control, her emotions and expression turned impassive. Her eyes flicked over the scene, and then she ran towards me, leaping onto the bike.

"Go!" she hissed into my ear, clutching my waist. _No one touches me. _

"She's escaping!" Brejik howled, running in front of the swoop.

_Control. _I snarled violently, and accelerated. Brejik stood his ground, until he realized I was not planning to dodge him. The look of shock as he jumped aside at the last minute was almost comical.

Blaster shots fired after us. I heard Bastila stifle a scream. _Dodge. _I dropped the blaster, and used both hands to steer, weaving the bike jerkily as it erupted onto the swoop track. _Dammit, this was meant to be Mission's task! _

Bastila tightened her grip. I ruthlessly forced back an instinctive anger. _Why do I hate people touching me? _I jerked the bike to the right, narrowly avoiding a large metal box on the track. _Oh great. Obstacles to make the race more interesting. _Bastila's head turned against my back.

"There are bikes after us!" she screamed over the wind. "Go faster!"

_I don't know how to ride this stupid bike, and she wants me to speed up? _Well, I guess things were pretty desperate. I accelerated to maximum, changing gears. The bike lurched forward, and my hands strained to retain their grip. Bastila's arms clenched around my midsection tightly. I flew over a launch pad, and our speed increased further. _Heh, I bet this is like Force speed from a spectator's point of view. _With a grunt, I turned hurriedly to miss another obstacle, and struggled to stop the bike from spinning. _Concentrate. _

I didn't notice as we passed over the finish line. I was relatively oblivious until I saw a metal wall loom towards us. Alleys on both sides grabbed my attention. _Not enough time to brake! _Horror bubbled up as the wall came ever closer.

"Jump!" I howled, lurching to the right and grabbing Bastila's arm in the process. I smacked and rolled, the concrete painfully bruising my limbs. Bastila landed on top of me. A loud crash drummed over us, followed by a heat wave as the bike exploded.

The Jedi jumped to her feet, and pulled me up, staring at me in imperious disbelief. A whirling piece of carnage sailed dangerously close past my head. I spotted the chasing Vulkars getting closer.

"You call that a rescue?" Bastila demanded arrogantly, crossing her arms.

Incredulity swamped any anger that may have surfaced, as I gaped at her.

She shook her head, delicate braids tossing. "No time to argue. Come, we must go." She ran into the nearest alley.

Stunned at her audacity, I could only follow.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Red Mage Neko: I'm still fleshing out Bastila's reaction to Jen...poor Basi, what a person to be bonded too._

_snackfiend101: thanks, again :)_

_Brynn: Cheers, I really do appreciate the feedback & suggestions, keep it coming! As long as Jen is struggling with multiple personalities, realistically Bastila has to be aware of it as you said - especially since I consider Bastila to be very powerful in the empathic side of the force. I'll try my best to keep it realistic._

_Lord Valentai: thanks, I'll try my best to do Bastila justice._


	14. Resolve

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen - Resolve**

_- Bastila Shan -_

* * *

The blaster hole warmed my side with pulses of agony. I wrapped the pain up in detachment, and ran down the dim alley. I could hear her footsteps following, and my mind screamed at me in fear. 

_There is no emotion; there is peace. _

There was only one exit – a narrow archway to the right. I passed the corner as the sounds of blaster fire greeted my ears. I regulated my strained breathing, and ran on. The woman's hoarse pants behind me sent a staccato reminder of all that I tried desperately to ignore, until there was such time to reflect. _You cannot make a human out of a beast. _My father's sage advice, after my miserable attempt at raising a kath pup. _Let serenity dictate your actions; emotions simply blur logical judgments. _

I fervently wished I still had my lightsaber.

Three exits out of this hallway. I choose the left one; a dark twisty tunnel, and continued running.

My plan had been simple. Wait until some fool gang member had won that childish competition. Wait until I was led away, submissive and apparently unconscious. And then, make my move. _All that, ruined by men and their hot-blooded tempers._

But I had not been ready to face Revan in the midst of such slaughter.

A choice between two paths; again, I choose the left.

"Stop!" she hissed behind me. I whirled around to see her disappear into a side exit I had not seen. I forced my alarm back, and dashed after her.

Walls closeted me on both sides. The artificial lighting of the Lower City had run away screaming from this place, and I struggled to harness the Force to sense her.

"We should be safe here for a few minutes," she whispered to me. "We have a lead on the Vulkars now, and anyway, I doubt they'd spot this alley if you didn't."

"Why are we stopping?" I demanded imperiously.

She uttered no response, and a second later I heard a faint click.

"Are you guys bloody listening?" Revan hissed. I heard a crackle of static, and realized she was using a comm.-link of some description. _To think that I am indebted to Revan._ But her own debts to humanity itself were beyond the region of appalling; I owed her nothing. _Yet why has she rescued **me**?_

"Jen! Dammit, I saw that fight on the holoscreens! We feared the worst - how can you be alive?" a male voice chipped back. To my utter astonishment, I heard her laugh. _How much of her is Revan? _An icy horror crawled through my insides. _Who else would laugh in such a situation? _My mind rolled over the humour that streamed from her inside the bond. It was more potent than her fear. And I thought I'd felt her reach out to the Force earlier.

That alone made me want to run away, gibbering.

_There is no chaos; there is harmony. _

"No time for lectures, flyboy! We need help, and we need it now," she said in a low voice.

"Zaalbar and I are already scouring the alleyways. Where are you?" the man demanded.

"No idea, Mission might know. Can I speak to her?"

"Uh, she's been missing since you left." A crackling howl of some description followed the response.

Revan swore, and I winced instinctively. "Nevermind. We'll head to the Upper City – see you in the hideout."

"Don't do anything stup-" A click, and the comm.link turned off. I sensed Revan turn to face me. I resisted the urge to shrink back from what I knew to be her piercing green gaze. _You cannot make a human out of a beast. _Why had I even tried?

_Because she had been human, once._

"We need to get to the Upper City. There may be some old maintenance shafts around here – I don't think we can risk going through the main entrance," she was saying as she appeared to be removing her clothes. It was sometimes hard to tell with Force sense.

"What are you doing?" My voice, firm and resolved. _Good. _

"Shedding my overalls. I don't think you really want to wander around Taris half-naked."

I felt my cheeks burn as I realized my state of undress. _Brejik's doing, the slimy bastard. _I forced my rage and pain under control with some effort. I could not quite quell the desire to see him dead, for what had happened.

As Revan continued undressing, I realized that the leadership role had shifted. I could not allow her to get control.

_I must postpone the mission. I must get her to the Masters. _I struggled to hold onto my detached calm. _I must get myself to the Masters._

"Good idea," I said coolly, and took the clothing she proffered in the darkness. "Now, what is your plan of action from here?"

I sensed her incredulity, and wondered why. "To get away from the guys trying to kill us!"

I heard her move further down the narrow alley. "Who were you talking to?" I demanded.

"Your boyfriend," she said in a wry tone.

"I beg your pardon?" I snapped. The very word stirred up feelings and memories that I had to keep under wraps.

I heard her stifle a chuckle. "Carth Onasi," she enlightened me.

_Carth! Now the rescue finally makes sense. She must not remember who she really is, then. But I do not think she is entirely Jen Sahara anymore. _"Captain Onasi is alive? Finally, some good news!" I enthused. "But let's get down to business - we're not out of danger yet. If I'm going to figure out a way for us to get out of here and off this planet, then I need to know what kind of resources we can draw on."

_**Talk about your all-time spoilt Jedi brats!** _I stiffened indignantly as I translated Revan's uppermost thought patterns. The bond allowed me to interpret stronger, outer thoughts, and that combined with the emotions I could sense from her gave me the upper hand. _I hope._

I took in a deep breath._ At least she cannot read my thoughts. _

"Look, lady, I'm taking you back to flyboy, and then I'm off," she informed me coldly. _We'll just see about that. _Determination, anger and fear battled underneath my blanket of serenity.

"My name is Jedi Shan, if you don't recall from the Endar Spire," I said archly. "But we'll discuss it later. For now, we should get a move on," I continued in a neutral tone.

"You brought it up!" she exclaimed in a petulant tone. "Argh!" She ran further, and I followed, reciting the Jedi Code to keep my judgment logical and calm.

"Jen!" A kid's voice in the darkness halted our stride.

"Mission?" Incredulity laced through Revan's voice. _**I'm going to kill that reckless girl!** _I heard her thoughts, and fear shot through me in heat waves. _No! I must stop her! _I reached out to the Force, ready to stun Revan at a moment's notice.

"You're amazing!" the voice gushed, and I sensed the presence of a Twi'lek girl.

"And you're in so much trouble!" Revan retorted. I was an inch away from pushing her into stasis when I heard her laugh. Surprise alone pulled me back. "I'd spank you silly if I wasn't so happy to see you!"

_Spank? What is she babbling about? _I heard a huff from the girl called Mission. I then fully interpreted the emotions gushing through the bond. Fear for the girl's safety, rather than the violent anger I had expected. I sagged in relief and happy surprise, closing my eyes briefly. I had been afraid, for a moment there, that I would be witnessing the returning of Revan. Darth Revan.

"Spank me? You ain't my mother, and I'm not a kid!"

"Peace, Mission, sorry. Just a bit tense." She actually sounded sincere.

Mission sniffed. "I did what you asked, and stayed out of the fighting. But I freaked when I saw the race!"

"Mission – know a way to the Upper City from here?"

"The Upper City? But I thought-"

"The Bek base won't be safe, after that slaughter," Revan muttered, cutting the Twi'lek off. Her next thought washed through my mind. _**Not entirely sure I'll be welcome, either**. _I wondered what she had done to offend them.

"Alright!" the kid agreed brightly. "Follow me!"

The girl led us further down the dark tunnel, and we followed her silently. Revan's emotions had settled down, and all I could sense from her now was an icy determination. _I cannot let her get away. _I realized I needed to use all my persuasive powers to convince Revan to journey with me. But that could wait, until we were in a safe place.

Mission led us an abandoned elevator shaft. There was still no light whatsoever, and I wondered how Revan could find her way around. I could detect some sort of visor on the Twi'lek, but Revan's ability to move through darkness disturbed me. _She may not be who she once was, but she is not wholly Jen Sahara anymore either._

"This hasn't been used in years. We can climb up the sides – it exits in a junkyard on the bad side of Upper Taris," Mission informed us as she twisted inside the hole. I wondered briefly what had happened to the elevator itself.

"There's a bad side of Upper Taris?" Revan muttered. It almost sounded sarcastic.

"Well, not bad like the Lower City. But generally where the aliens hang out. And some of the gangs."

"I think we had best avoid them, then," I said primly.

"That's the idea," Mission said brightly. I was glad to hear no sarcasm in her voice.

The agility of the girl surprised me, as I sensed her climb up the supporting railings in the shaft. Revan followed more slowly, occasionally muttering to herself. I did not have too much trouble, with the Force as my ally. The pain in my back had dulled to a distant throbbing. _Soon I will take care of that._

A thin ray of weak light began to permeate our surroundings as we neared the top. My muscles ached despite the assistance I'd been using. _I cannot wait for some time in a refresher unit. _I had been feeling dirty for far too long. I could still feel demanding, violent hands upon my skin.

"Alright, we're here," Mission whispered as I climbed out after Revan. I look around; we were surrounded by dull high-rise buildings. We appeared to be standing in some sort of scrap heap. I could see a small group of Ithorians some distance away.

A beep from Revan's wrist caught the attention of us all. She pressed a button on her wrist comm.

"Jen, where are you? Zaalbar's getting desperate, if his howls are anything to go by," a voice barked out, accompanied by a roar. _That must be Carth. I wonder who Zaalbar is. Could that be a Wookiee, here on Taris? _As preposterous as the idea was, the howl sounded vaguely like one.

"We're fine, in the Upper City. Mission's with us. Meet you at the apartment," Revan replied succinctly, and switched the comm. off.

"Big Z's gonna yell at me," the Twi'lek muttered sulkily.

I saw Revan grin at her. "Mission, can you get us to an apartment building? It's near a cantina."

Mission groaned at Revan. "How many cantinas do you think are in Upper Taris? Sheesh, and how many apartment buildings?"

"Well, the cantina hosts a dueling ring run by a Hutt called Ajuur, if that's any help."

The girl brightened. "We're close by! That's in the alien side, where we are. Follow me!"

We managed to avoid any Sith, but I saw some in the distance. I was suddenly glad for the grimy overalls Revan had lent me, otherwise I might have made a spectacle of myself.

Revan took over the lead as we entered a run-down building. She strode over to a door, and started picking the lock. _That's not a skill Jen Sahara knows._ A cold chill danced down my spine. Revan looked up at me suddenly, green eyes intent. _Can she sense the bond? _Fear pricked goose pimples along my arms. I hurriedly detached myself from it, and attempted to smile warmly at Revan. She blinked warily at me, and turned back to the electronic lock.

"Hey, you're not bad," Mission commented as Revan opened the door. "Not as good as me, though." She grinned cheekily, and Revan laughed at her. _The Twi'lek seems to calm her down. Interesting._

We entered a very small room indeed, and I noticed only one bed. "Is this where you have been camping out?" I asked.

"Uh, more or less," Revan muttered.

"So," Mission interrupted brightly, and turned to face me. "I'm Mission by the way!" She beamed. I smiled back at her.

"It's nice to meet you, Mission. And thank you for your assistance. I am Bastila Shan."

The door opened then, and Carth Onasi strode in, followed by a huge Wookiee. My eyes widened in surprise, despite the fact I had already guessed Zaalbar's form.

"Bastila!" Carth said in relief. "Finally, things are looking up." He crooked a smile at me.

"Carth Onasi, it is good to see you again," I responded. My unease dissipated a little. I fully trusted Carth's loyalty to the Republic.

"Mission!" The Wookiee strode over to Mission, and picked her up bodily. He didn't seem to be threatening any harm to her, but I held myself ready for action in any case. I could not trust Revan's companions.

"(Why did you run off? I was going mad with worry!)"

I calmed somewhat as I heard the Wookiee's distress.

The Twi'lek struggled. "Let me down, Big Z!"

"(No!)" he howled. "(You keep running into danger, and scaring me witless!)"

"(Zaalbar, you should blame me.)" Revan shocked me by speaking Shyriiwook to the Wookiee. I shivered. _How many of Revan's skills is she picking up? She cannot have remembered them all. Please, tell me she cannot._ "(I encouraged Mission to turn up. I thought I might need her skills, and she was the only one capable of sneaking onto the track.)"

Zaalbar put Mission down gently. I saw the Twi'lek shoot a quick glance at Revan. _They are not telling everything that went on. _

"(Jen,)" the Wookiee wailed. "(I cannot-)"

"Big Z, calm down, okay? Jen needed some help, and I was the only one who could do it. You'd put yourself in danger to help as well, if you could! Let me do my part, alright? I ain't a kid." The Twi'lek was scowling at Zaalbar, but turned to glance tentatively at Revan. Revan nodded briefly in response. _They are collaborating on a cover story._

Carth sighed suddenly. "Whatever you guys are arguing about, you may as well drop it. Jen's determined to be insanely reckless, and for some odd reason it seems to pay off. Bastila's here, and alive."

I frowned at him; I did not like to be reminded over who had saved me.

"Well, enough of this. We should be talking about the plan to get off Taris," I said primly, hoping to end the discussion.

"I knew it!" Mission said exuberantly. "Big Z, we're going on an adventure!"

I blinked in surprise at her. I noticed a strange look on Revan's face as she gazed at Mission.

"Um, Mission," Revan began hesitantly. "I'm not going with them." The Twi'lek jerked around to stare in bemused disappointment at her. Determination welled up within me, but before I could speak out Carth cut me off.

"That's right," he sneered, scowling at her. "Just leave – walk out on the Republic and your promises to the Jedi Council." I was surprised at how angry he, a professional and experienced Republic officer, sounded.

"I'm not walking out on anybody." Revan clenched her teeth. I felt the taste of her anger amongst other indeterminable emotions.

"You cannot walk out, Jen," I interrupted smoothly. "You signed a contract with the Jedi Council, do you remember?" She should, that was one of the artificial ones. That memory should bind her well and truly to the Council.

Her face drained of all colour, as her green eyes gazed at me helplessly. The stink of nausea and fear stormed from her, but was replaced immediately with a white hot anger that overpowered everything else. I tensed myself.

"That contract!" she spat suddenly. "I wouldn't sign anything like that! It's- it's effective slavery!"

"No, it's simply your services for the next five years. In return for an ample salary, and the start of your career." I clutched onto my serenity resolvedly, I had to stay calm. "It is an employment contract, Jen. The Jedi do not look kindly upon people who walk out on such contracts."

_**She dares to threaten me?** _Her thought, overshadowed with a dark, twisted fury, shattered my calm. It was quickly followed by another. **_No, I will not get angry, dammit! Maybe I should go with them. Just to get off Taris. And then do a bunk, since Mission wants to leave so much. I wonder if that's feasible? _**I saw Revan's face twist with suppressed emotions. That logic should so quickly follow rage scared me. Her last thought twirled through my mind - _**No, it's too risky. I cannot go with them**_ - and I decided a less than truthful course of action was the way to go.

"Jen, perhaps you could accompany us to Aldaraan to begin with. I am sure we could do with your skills, and those of your friends." I had sensed that Zaalbar and Mission were following her. Revan could always inspire strong loyalty. "If you still feel the need to run, then I cannot stop you. However I do think you should at least face the council before disappearing." _She will not have that choice, _I vowed to myself, but kept the thought small.

Revan's face had turned blank, as she looked back at me. She nodded slowly. _Success._

"Okay," She said softly. "I'll join you until Aldaraan."

xXx

I spent time later in the refresher, trying to erase the stink of the Vulkars. I could feel invisible marks imprinted on my body, and flashes of Brejik's treatment tormented my mind. I shuddered, and forced back tears. _I am a Jedi, I am at peace. Trials and tribulations only make me stronger. _Oh, how I wished that I had been in full control of the Force back on the swoop track! _Brejik would have been dead. _No, Jedi do not kill. _I would not have killed him. I am better than that. _I could not quite convince myself. The neural disrupter and the sedatives had left me helpless, like a child.

_I will never be helpless again._

The others were talking softly in the main room; I'd left them there to clean up and change into a spare set of clothes Carth had dashed out to get me. Revan felt more at peace now, or perhaps the word was resolved. I closed my eyes wearily.

_I did not expect to deal with her alone. _Back on the Endar Spire, there had been a group of Jedi Knights accompanying me. While I had been called Commander, it was more a token gesture due to my Battle Meditation. In truth, Galdea and Seris had led the group. _And they are dead. All of them. _Carth had told me we were the only survivors. I blinked back tears. _My old friend Kylah, also gone. _Pain, grief and fear were being heaped in piles upon my head, and I was not sure how much more I could take.

_Grief can come later. I must focus on the task at hand. _

We had been heading towards Tatooine, the first of the Star Maps. Although my Battle Meditation had given me a public image in the eyes of the Republic, it had been my vision of Revan and Malak coupled with the bond that granted me at last some status within the Order. _Even if I am still a Padawan._

The vision that had overpowered me after I saved Revan's life still struck fear within me. Revan and Malak, entering the tomb on Dantooine. Back when they were still Jedi. _But after their journey to the Dark Side had begun._

I could still remember them both as they were when I had first met them. _Malak, inordinately handsome and charming. Revan, cheeky, likeable, and fun. Both of them seemed so good._

It was as Master Vrook said, never underestimate the lure of the Dark Side. _But there must have been something rotten in them both to begin with, surely?_

Even when I had first met them, their emotions had been apparent and uncontrolled. I closed my eyes, and remembered...

…

_I followed Kylah into the courtyard; dust swirling upwards from a gentle summer's breeze captured my eyes. I winced, squinting them shut. I could vaguely hear the _shink shink _noise of a lightsaber duel._

_"That's Revan and Malak!" Kylah whispered in awe. I snapped my eyes open, ignoring the tears that streamed from them._

_Merely ten metres away fought two figures; one small, fast and fierce, the other large and strong._ Revan and Malak? _I thought in wonderment. I'd heard about them, who hadn't? Two Jedi taken by the Order very late in life, and already both Jedi Knights after five brief years. _And I have been here over ten. _I quenched that envious thought, and reminded myself of the humility needed by all Jedi alike._

_I watched as Revan ducked and dodged Malak's more powerful attacks. In return, she flurried a few quick blows, which he parried easily. I couldn't take my eyes off the fight._

I do not believe I could fight that well, despite my extensive training. _However, they were both Guardians; my talents lay elsewhere._ I will not envy others for their gifts.

_"It's like a dance, isn't it?" Kylah commented. I nodded agreement with her, but kept my focus on the duel. All of a sudden, Malak flew backwards into the dust, and Revan leaped on top of him, landing a pseudo fatal blow._

_"End game!" she crowed._

_"Hey, that's not fair!" Malak complained, scrambling to his feet. "You said no Force powers!"_

_"Fair? Come on, never expect your enemy to be fair!" Revan was grinning mischievously, green eyes dancing with merriment. Malak scowled and glanced our way, his eyes catching on me. I was suddenly aware of just how handsome he was. He smiled warmly, and headed towards me._

_"I don't believe I have met you before?" he queried, his deep brown eyes intent on my face. I was not used to such attention; I could not quite still the flush that scoured my cheeks. _He may be two years older than me, but I have had much more training. There is no emotion. _A rogue thought stated that he, however, had had a lot more life experience than I._

_"I- I am Bastila Shan," I stammered, not quite meeting his eyes._

_"Pleased to meet you, beautiful Bastila. I am Malak Devari." He caught my flailing hand, and raised it to his lips. A warm glow invaded my abdomen treacherously. I looked back into his eyes nervously; they seemed to shine just for me. He winked, and then looked backwards at Revan. I followed his gaze, and saw the Jedi glaring angrily at us._

_"Is this your pathetic way of getting me back for that spacer on Coruscant? I thought you were above playing with innocents," she lashed out at him, and turned on her heel. I stiffened as cold ice replaced the earlier glow. My eyes shot back to Malak's; he was frowning intently at Revan. The deep emotion in his eyes gave the game away. _

He loves her. And he is toying with me.

_I snatched my hand away in outraged confusion. Malak glanced back at me shamefully and grimaced, perhaps in apology. Then he whirled around to chase after Revan._

_"Rev! Wait!" he groaned as he dashed off._

_Kylah laid a hand on my shoulder. "He should not play with other peoples emotions like that," she said softly. "A Jedi should not act so."_

…

I sighed, and reopened my eyes. I could perhaps have dealt with this situation in a collected fashion, had Revan been assuming the identity of Jen Sahara fully. _Like she had been back on the Endar Spire. _Back then, she had acted exactly like the real Jen Sahara would have; meek, shy and obedient. I felt a passing sense of sadness for the girl, but there was nothing we could have done to save her.

_But Revan isn't Jen Sahara. However she does seem to have some good in her, also. I sense empathy when she looks at Mission. She did rescue me as well. _I couldn't understand this enigma; either she was Jen or she was Revan. Yet she seemed to be acting like neither. _Or both._

The only thing I could surmise was that the planted personality was beginning to shake loose. I had to postpone Tatooine, and get back to the Masters.

The fact that Malak had caught wind of our plan and attacked the Endar Spire frightened me, also. _How did he find out that we know about the Star Maps? _

_I need guidance. And help. _I shook my head in irritation, and stepped out of the unit. _I am calm, I am serene. I am resolute. _

Stress and tension had built up to a boiling point since I'd met Revan. Rationally, I forced myself to review the situation I was now in. _I must lead this party to Dantooine as readily as possible. _Revan aside, I knew that I myself needed time, guidance and recuperation.

I refused to let my fear overcome my judgment. I had to return to the others, calm and in control of the mission. I could not let Revan gain leadership again.

_Somehow, I will get her to the Masters._

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xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Red Mage Neko - thanks! I really did enjoy writing the swoop race chapter :)_

_Data - Yep, Bastila's powerful...but she has her own issues to deal with as well. And as for the real Revan being powerful...mwhaha, that'll come later :)_

_Brynn - Cheers again for the suggestion. I've got different plans for Canderous, and particularly Jen coming up in a few chapters time...but we'll see how it turns out :)_

_snackfiend101 - hehe, glad you liked it! As for council, well um... hrm, don't want to give anything away at this stage._

_Waffles - thank you :) Bit like having a demon & angel on your shoulders, aye?_


	15. Mandalorian gambit

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen – Mandalorian gambit**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

Mission and Zaalbar had already headed off for the night before Bastila returned from her long stint in the refresher. They had rightly assumed that the tiny room would not fit five. 

Carth was busy tinkering with his blasters, while I curled up on the only bed, stretching tight and bruised limbs. _Why do I always end up injured? _

Flashes of raw grief were shooting through the bond. I wondered how much of it was because of me. It had not escaped my notice that Bastila could sense my emotions as well as I could hers. _If not better._ I was currently debating my options.

_If I travel with them, will Bastila really allow me to leave? _Jedi did not lie, as a rule. _But does that mean I can trust her? _I couldn't even trust myself.

On the other hand, staying on Taris had little appeal. _Between the Sith and the gang war, there will be plenty to keep me occupied, _a dark thought commented with satisfaction. I scowled angrily, and forced my mind clear. _Brejik will know who I am by now. I'll have the Vulkars after me before too long. I can't be insane enough to want that._

And still, part of me wished to trust Bastila. _She is a Jedi. She may be able to help me. _But her proximity with the mind-link suggested otherwise. I thought I had sensed fear from her earlier as well, when she looked at me. _Could it be that she is just as scared of me? _No, that seemed a little... far-fetched.

I realized then that if I was to travel with her and Carth, I'd either have to come clean with my identity problems or do better with the façade. _Perhaps I should see Zelka again. If I'm only traveling with Bastila to Alderaan, surely even I could deceive her for that time? _I doubted it, for I hadn't even been able to convince Onasi.

He turned around then, and eyed me over seriously. I felt a small wedge of humour lift my black mood; for some reason harassing Carth usually made me feel better. _Except when he wins._

"Jen, for all that I don't care for your... ethics, I just wanted to, uh, thank you. For going through with everything, and getting Bastila back," he said in a low tone.

"Ethics?" I smirked at him. "What have I done now?"

His brows lowered. "Let's not turn this into an argument, alright?"

"Hey!" I raised my hands in mock surrender. "What did I say?"

He glared at me, but I wondered if I saw him struggling to hold back a grin. I smiled at him sweetly. "Come on, flyboy, you can't make a dig at my moral character and then not explain it!"

"Wanna bet?" He crossed his arms, still staring at me steadily.

"Five credits?" I offered, grinning impishly. "I'll just nag you until you tell me."

He sighed, and promptly gave up. "Look, I was just referring to your willingness to walk out on a contract."

My amusement vanished. I scowled. "Oh. The employment contract." There was something wrong about that. "Let me ask you, Onasi, whether you would willingly serve the Jedi for five years. Five years!" I ended in a hiss, struggling to control the anger the bubbled up at the thought.

"No. But then I wouldn't be stupid enough to sign it in the first place," he said shortly, and turned back to the workbench, indicating the end of the conversation. A dull flush of emotion scrambled over my face. I wasn't sure if it was from embarrassment or anger.

_There's something that feels wrong about that memory. _I could crisply remember meeting delegates of the Jedi Order, and autoprinting that stupid contract. The Jen side of me thought it was an exciting career opportunity, which in itself didn't sit right. _Didn't I want to be a history teacher on Deralia? Would I really have thought leaving home was exciting? _I frowned, rifling through Jen's other memories._ I remember saying farewell to my proud parents. How is it my father let me leave the planet, when he'd always refused to allow me out of the commune in which I'd been born? _I clenched my teeth suddenly. _Not my father. **Jen's** father. _Still, everything about Jen's life from that moment onwards seemed somehow odd. _The memory is so clear, like it happened yesterday. Usually memories get hazy overtime; you recall the essence of what occurred, but little details and words get muddled. I feel like I'm watching a replay of a holovid whenever I recall it._

Directly after I – _no, Jen_ – had signed the contract, my time of hazy numbness with the Jedi had started. _It's all odd. Zelka had talked about hypnotic techniques possibly helping. I wonder if that's worth following up._

Bastila walked back into the room then, and smiled tentatively at me. I could sense she was struggling to be friendly. I nodded back. _I can't make her out. Is she a Jedi who could help me, or is she a guard?_

"Perhaps it's time to discuss where we are at with leaving Taris," Bastila said primly. Carth turned around to face us.

"Uh, well Bastila, we don't really have a plan as of yet."

She turned shocked eyes on Carth. "What have you been doing all this time then?" she demanded imperiously.

I had to stifle a giggle. _Whoever said Jedi were reasonable? _"We were rescuing you, Bastila," I told her dryly.

She frowned at me. "I would have expected one of you to have the sense to think ahead," she snapped.

"Bastila, don't you think you're being a little unfair?" Carth said seriously.

Her dark eyes widened in outrage. _She's not used to being questioned. _"I happen to be in charge of this mission, if you'll recall!"

Again, I bit back laughter. _Why do I always react to everything with hysteria or rage? _I didn't know, but seeing the prissy, uptight Jedi throwing a temper tantrum struck all the humour chords in my body.

Carth had a stony look on his face I was becoming all too familiar with. "I know you're new at this Bastila, but a leader doesn't berate her troops just because things aren't going as planned. Don't let your ego get in the way of the real issues here."

Bastila straightened her spine in defiance, and literally stared down her nose at Carth. "That hardly strikes me as an appropriate way of addressing your commander, Carth. I am a member of the Jedi Order and this is my mission. Don't forget that!" She practically sniffed at the last.

"You might be in charge, but that doesn't make you a good leader, Bastila!" Carth's voice was rising with heat now. "You know, I had my doubts about this mission but I figured the Jedi Council wouldn't put you in charge if you weren't prepared. But here you are, acting like a spoiled child!" Carth had folded his arms defensively, while Bastila had hers propped up on hips in anger.

I couldn't control myself any longer; I burst out laughing. I clapped my hand over my mouth instinctively, but it was too late. Bastila's mouth dropped open in affronted anger; Carth stared at me in disbelief. A second later I saw his mouth twitching.

"Better than a talk show, you two!" I guffawed. "And I thought Carth and I were bad!"

"How can you make light-"

"She's right, Bastila. We are both behaving like kids," Carth cut her off wryly. "It must be Jen's influence."

"Gee thanks, flyboy." I smirked at him.

"Well, I-" Bastila looked at both of us, and sighed heavily. "Perhaps I should not be so quick to judge. I apologize, Carth."

A heavy knock at the door snatched the attention of all. Carth grabbed his blasters quickly; I catapulted off the bed towards our growing stash of vibroblades. _And to think we used to have problems with getting weapons. Nothing like storming a gang base to improve your supply._

"Who knows we are here?" Bastila whispered.

"No one," Carth said shortly. "Other than Mission and Zaalbar, who would not knock."

"No, she'd pick the lock," I muttered, taking a defensive stance near the door. The knock, loud and heavy, sounded again.

I looked back at the others, and shrugged. "Who's there?"

"(I am looking for Jen Sahara,)" a gruff, deep voice called out in Mandalorian. _Sithspit. That must be Canderous, coming to collect Bastila._

"Well, he's got us cornered, so I may as well open the door," I told the others. "Be prepared to fight, though, I think he's after Bastila." I heard the Jedi gasp as I activated the entry switch, holding a blade crossed in front of my body.

To my surprise, Canderous was alone. He smirked at my battle pose, and his eyes trailed suggestively over Bastila. "(Well done. I didn't think you'd get out of the Lower City alive.)"

"(I'll take that as a compliment.)" I grinned at him, but still stood ready. I did not trust the Mandalorian, particularly since he had found our place of residence.

"(I have a proposition for you, Jen.)" He had stopped ogling Bastila, and turned to face me once more.

"(She's not for sale,)" I said shortly. I could feel Bastila's indignant fury wash over my mind. _Oh, she can understand Mandalorian as well? _I shouldn't be surprised, Jedi probably learned a whole host of languages.

He laughed heartily at that. "(If I was here on Davik's behalf, I would not be offering credits, let me assure you.)"

"(So why are you here then, Canderous?)"

His grey eyes bored into mine steadily; I returned his stare. "(I'll be frank. I have been looking for an... ally, shall we say, to help me leave Taris. Your fighting skills have impressed me. You are also just a little bit crazy, which is exactly what I'm looking for.)"

I felt my eyebrows lift in surprise, and tasted wariness from Bastila.

"(Why do you think I want to leave Taris?)" I asked mildly.

He snorted, and shot Bastila an obvious look. "(You don't really expect me to bother with a reply, do you?)"

"(Fair enough. Why do you want to leave Taris?)" I responded warily. _It could be a trap. Peace, it probably is. I already know Davik wants to get his claws on Bastila. _I kept my face blank. _Is that really **my** problem?_

"(As you probably know, I work for Davik Kang and the Exchange. Rotten hours, but the pay makes up for it. However, lately Davik hasn't been paying what he promised. He should know better than to cheat a Mandalorian.)"

I couldn't help grinning in agreement at Canderous. _What sort of idiot cheats a Mandalorian and then doesn't kill him? _His lips curved ever so slightly at my expression, but he continued talking. "(I figure it's time for me to break the Sith quarantine and get off this backwater planet. I've got a plan to escape Taris, but I can't do it alone.)"

_May as well hear him out. Though I suppose we should be speaking in Basic, wouldn't want flyboy to have a fit._ "What's your plan, then?"

He looked faintly surprised when I switched languages, but followed suit. "I can get access to Davik's flagship – the Ebon Hawk. However any ship leaving the atmosphere without launch codes will be disintegrated by the Sith fleet's automated defense guns. That's where you come in."

I snorted. Carth coughed incredulously behind us. "You want us to infiltrate the Sith base?" he asked derisively. "How crazy do you think we are?"

"I ain't talking to you." Canderous turned heavy-lidded eyes on Carth. "I'm talking to your friend, aren't I?"

"He has a point, though," I interjected. "Breaking into the Sith base is tantamount to suicide. Add that into the fact that I can't trust you, and I don't really see why I should help you out here." I kept my tone neutral, matter-of-fact. I wasn't stupid enough to sneer at a Mandalorian.

"It would be simply ridiculous to attempt a break-in on the Sith base!" Bastila cut in. I had the distinct feeling she had been holding herself back until now.

"I ain't yapping to you either, princess." Canderous stared contemptuously at Bastila and then turned to me again. "Can't say I think much of your friends. Look, I don't like working with strangers either but we don't have much choice." Canderous paused. "However, I can give you some help with the Sith base."

"You want to join us?" I asked incredulously.

He grinned ferally at me. "Normally nothing would stop me from a good, clean fight, but I am too well recognized. I can, however, point you towards a top of the line astromech droid that can get you inside the base."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Don't suppose you can acquire me a droid that will also get me out?"

Canderous barked a laugh. "You'll have to accomplish that on your own. If you want the droid, go to Janice Nall and ask for Davik's special droid. Tell her Canderous sent you, and she'll be a sweet as honey." He eyed me over once more. "Either we work together, or we both stay stuck here on Taris. I'll give you three days to act on this. If you don't, then you can consider the offer withdrawn. I'll be at Javyar's cantina in the evenings." He turned to leave, and then added one more comment. "A word of caution, however. When you break in, try and be stealthy about it if possible. As soon as the Sith realize the launch codes have been compromised, they'll change them quicker than you can say escape from Taris." He nodded at me, and left abruptly. _I love the way he said "**when** you break in". Already assuming we are going to do it._

I closed the door slowly, my thoughts racing. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to follow his plan, or not. _I can't trust him... but heck, I can't trust anyone. _I frowned to myself. _Nothing like killing a few Sith to lift one's mood. _No, I restrained that thought. _I will not enjoy death, dammit._

"I don't sense any deception from him, which is surprising," Bastila said quietly, interrupting my inner debate. "Much as I hate to say it, he's probably right. We're going to need that ship," she continued.

Carth was shaking his head. "This is a bad idea. Mercs like him haven't a lick of conscience... they'll betray you in a heartbeat."

_But it's our only plan to leave Taris so far. _"Probably can't hurt to check out that droid," I said. "Unless either of you have a better plan?"

Carth scowled. "I wish I did. I don't trust him. Jen, why did you think he was after Bastila?"

"Good question," Bastila interposed.

I grimaced. "I saw Canderous at the swoop track. He let slip that Davik was interested in acquiring her."

Bastila kept her face blank as I spoke, which impressed me. However, the lightening quick thrust of fear and fury that blasted through the bond stunned me. _Her anger feels as strong as mine. _A split-second later and all I could sense from her was serenity.

"All the more reason not to listen to him then!" Carth was ranting.

"I wish we could afford that luxury, Carth," Bastila said, a trifle hesitantly. "But I believe Jen is right. We should at least investigate the droid tomorrow."

"Fine," Carth responded moodily, and let the matter drop.

We had a small meal of Tarisian fast food Carth had picked up earlier when he'd collected Bastila's new clothing. By mutual consensus, we decided it was time to call it a night. I'd seen Bastila eyeing up the only bed in hidden desire; and had briefly contemplated an argument. _What's the point? It's not like I'm planning to sleep at any rate. _My tired, bruised muscles however didn't agree. _Why should that sniveling Jedi brat get her way? _

"You take the bed, Bastila," I said sweetly. _Because I have other things to do._

She glanced at me in surprise. "Thank you. I think I shall." Her almond shaped eyes were suspiciously watching mine, however, and I wondered if she heard the false sincerity in my voice. _Damn this bond._

We bedded down for the night, and I lulled myself into a relaxed state. Bastila felt wary and tense through the mind-link, and I wasn't about to chance her catching me slip out. I could feel her presence slowly relaxing my head. I gave it a fair few hours, and then stealthily rose to my feet.

_A vibroblade, and my small pack is all I need. _I silently left the apartment, and headed towards the medical facility. _Zelka better be able to help me out, here. Bastila is suspicious enough of me already._

The serum was burning a hole into my pocket. _And I still haven't decided what to do about that. A thousand credits would help me out a lot on Alderaan._

Oh well, I guess I'd play it by ear. That approach had worked for me thus far, after all.

* * *

xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - Thanks, I really wanted to make sure I got Bastila right. Yup, they've already found the Dantooine one, and were heading towards the first map on Tatooine when the Endar Spire was attacked. I will say no more!...:)_

_Xan - Thanks for the reviews & feedback. Re: the rancor - the scene wasn't really based on the room in the game, but rather a room in my head - which possibly wasn't the best idea. I'll have a another look over the chapter and see if I can make it more clear. Glad you're enjoying it - I've got no problems with constructive complaints, it helps me review my work in another light. Also like the compliments too, of course! heh :)_

_Data - Thanks for the feedback, appreciate it. How I was trying to portray the contract was: - perhaps enslavement from Jen's point of view, but a standard, if tight, employment/scholar apprenticeship contract from the Order's point of view...realistically, it's an artificial implanted memory designed to keep Jen under the watchful eye of the Jedi Order. (It would be too dangerous to have a flimsy contract that would allow her to walk away whenever she felt like it, just in case the personality didn't hold). That was my idea anyway, perhaps I could try to make that more clear in time._


	16. Journey of the mind

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen – Journey of the mind**

_- Zelka Forn -_

* * *

The girl was lying on the medical bed, eyes closed and face slack. I could feel perspiration dripping down the sides of my face; it had been gruelling getting her into a suggestible trance state. I'd abandoned solely using centralizing techniques, and had resorted to the aid of focusing stimulants to get her this far. 

_It goes against my medical instincts to use drugs. _But she had been desperate for help._ Desperate enough to get me out of bed, in the middle of the night._ But she had not trusted me enough to mentally relax; the stimulants had been needed to fully hypnotize her.

I only hoped I could find out the cause of her anger, as she had explained it to me. She had asked purely for the ability to control her unwanted rage; that, however, was plainly impossible without exploring the root cause and reason for it in the first place. _Hence we attempt regressive hypnotism. _It wasn't something I had a wealth of experience of; only a snippet of study and three prior patients filled my repertoire on this area of medical knowledge. _But I shall try my best to help her._

My eyesight caught on the console's clock next to the bed, and I realized how little time it was before sunrise.

"Alright, Jen. You are sitting alone in the middle of a field, next to a gently trickling river. The sun is beating down on your head, and you feel totally at peace. Nothing can hurt you here." I took in a deep breath. It was time to begin. "I am going to ask you some questions, Jen, and I want you to answer as truthfully as you are able. Anytime you are feeling too scared or angry, I want you to retreat to this place. And any time I call out 'Stop', you will immediately arrive back here as well, calm and emotionless. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she responded quietly, almost mechanically.

"Okay Jen, I want you to think about the head injury you sustained. Take your mind back to five minutes before it occurred. What were you doing?"

"I was sleeping, dreaming," Jen replied in a soft voice.

"Move forward five minutes, Jen. Were you conscious at the time of your accident?"

"Darkness," she murmured. "Bad dreams. I can see people dying!" Her voice rose in panic.

"It's just a dream, Jen, it's not really happening," I said soothingly. _The accident occurred when she was sleeping, then. Perhaps it brought on a nightmare._

"No, it's not a dream! I died! The Sith killed me! They, they tortured me until I-"

"Stop," I said abruptly, and the girl paused, panic melting away from her face. _The Sith? I did wonder who she was running from. If they tortured her, perhaps they broke her mind as well. But she seems fairly coherent when awake._

"I want you to now recall when you first woke up after your injury. Where are you?"

"I don't know." Her voice had changed dramatically, and grabbed my attention. Instead of a high-pitched, panicked tone, it was now lower, sultry, and more confident. I frowned. _Why would her voice change? _She continued answering. "Some sort of ship. I haven't been conscious for a long time. No, no wait, I'm a scholar, onboard a Republic ship. Yes, that's right, I've been hired to look at some ruins."

I was stunned. _First the Sith, now the Republic? She must have come from one of the escape pods then. And at some stage the Sith had captured her. But why did her voice change?_

"That can't be right!" she continued. "That's not me."

"What do you mean?" I asked cautiously. "What is your name?" My intuition forced that question out; I did not really know why I asked it.

She didn't respond immediately. "I don't know," she whispered finally. "I think it could be Jen Sahara."

_Her memories have been awfully damaged. I'd best proceed very carefully. _"Alright, Jen, I do not want you to relive this, but simply answer the question. Can you tell me whether the Sith have ever captured you before?"

"Yes. They killed my family; my home. They captured me for information." Her voice had switched again, back to the trembling, high tone.

"You are in a green paddock, next to a river. The sun is shining on your head, and nothing can hurt you here. You are not reliving your memories; you are simply answering my questions. Can you remember what happened when the Sith captured you?"

"No, Jen has a mindblock," the confident tone answered. _A mindblock? Why would the Sith block the mind of a prisoner they were torturing? That doesn't make any sense! Perhaps the mindblock is something she created herself? _I shivered.

_And why did she answer in the third person?_

"Do you know who created the mindblock?"

A snarl ripped out of her throat, and I jumped backwards in surprise. "The same bitch who has me leashed and cut off from my power! I will destr-"

"Stop!" I called desperately, feeling fearful for the first time. _That was a third voice! _And one I certainly didn't want to hear again. Full of loathing, hate, anger... _what's going on here?_ I had a duty to help this girl to the best of my abilities, but... _Peace, if this isn't going to be difficult! _I was getting more and more uncertain of how to proceed._ I need to know more of her history, to understand where this rage is coming from._

"You are back in the summer field. You are safe. Can you tell me when your family was killed?"

"Four years ago." The sultry, sure voice was back. "We tried to help; they wouldn't let us get involved. The Mandalorians slaughtered everyone on Talshion, and we could have stopped them!" Grief and resentment darkened her tone.

_Mandalorians? _Talshion was one of the first planets to fall during the war, I knew that much. "I thought you said the Sith had killed your family, Jen?" I asked, puzzled.

"The Sith killed everyone!" Scared girl was back. "My parents! They're going to kill me, too!"

"Stop!" I commanded. _Split personality disorder?_ This situation was getting worrisome; if only Taris had a psychoanalyst then I'd stop right now. But no one else could help this girl, I could only do my best. "You are safe; no one can hurt you." I took in a deep breath. "Can you tell me a bit about your childhood?"

"I was a street kid," the confident voice returned, and I heard echoes of amusement in her tone. "We were lucky, far too many times, really. We'd sneak into places, and steal credits, and food. My mother was poor, you see, and sometimes it was the only way to eat. I always dreamed of a better life." She sounded wistful. I knew too many people like that, born in poverty and starved for life. Starved for more things than just food.

"You mentioned you were a scholar? What did you study?"

"I, I didn't." She sounded confused. "They took me away. Took us away. We were old, they said, but too powerful to ignore. I never saw my mother again."

_Who are **they?**_ Whoever took her away from her mother probably had something to do with this. "How old were you when you were taken from your mother, Jen?"

"I wasn't, they killed my mother!" The answer was scared, unsure. It suddenly clicked. _Every time I call her Jen, she responds in that identity. _I sighed._ I'm not qualified to be doing this._

"You are safe. You can smell the fresh grasses around you. No one is around; no one will harm you. How old were you when you were taken from your mother?" I repeated, omitting her name this time.

"I was sixteen."

"Were you kidnapped?"

"Well, in a sense, really. They were nice about it, I mean, but it's not like I had a choice. I barely got to say goodbye to Ma. They said I could go back to visit, but it was just platitudes. It's not fair! I could have saved her life, if not for them!"

"Stop," I responded, and her face went slack again. I needed to find out who was the real her, and which identity she had created. And, of course, the reason for the creation. _She'll believe they are both real._

"Where did you grow up, Jen?"

"Deralia," she responded meekly.

I didn't know that planet. "Can you tell me what your childhood was like, Jen?"

"It was quiet. My parents looked after me. I lived in a small community, and wanted to be a history teacher when I grew up."

Jen's life seemed a bit idyllic. _Perhaps the horrors of her real life caused her to create Jen? But why the mention of a mindblock? Why did she decide Jen's family were killed by the Sith? Was that truth, or fiction?_

"Did you have a happy childhood, Jen?"

"No. I was very lonely. My father was quite protective, and didn't let me meet many people."

_Maybe not so idyllic, after all. _"You said you were a scholar, Jen? What did you study?"

"Ancient archaeology and anthropology."

"Can you tell me a bit about your study, Jen?"

With a bit of prodding, she related to me some of the courses she had taken, in enough detail that I was convinced she had, at some stage, studied. I could hear a shy enthusiastic lilt in her voice as I prodded details and information out of her.

_So Jen is real, after all. The other identity is the false one? Perhaps she was so lonely, and shy, that she created a more confident alter ego?_

"When were you first aware of the anger and rage inside you, Jen?"

"When I woke up with a head injury, on the Endar Spire."

_And I still have to work out how the Republic fit into her life._

"And you didn't have these outbursts at all before this time?"

"I wasn't aware. I thought I was Jen," the sultry voice responded. "She's not real; they'd programmed her into me to make me more biddable."

_Hrm, some part of her resents being quiet, overlooked. She wants to feel important, so she's created a new identity and a reason as to why Jen is not real._

She snarled viciously, before I had a chance to say anything. "I was trapped. They dared to cage me!" Her voice had lowered further, into that dangerous, almost evil tone I'd heard once before.

"Stop," I commanded. _I need to find out who she resents so much. _"Who caged you?"

"They didn't cage me. They freed me." Confident, sultry girl was back. "They broke my link with the darkness. But... I can't handle the guilt. It would be easier to, to..." she trailed off.

"To what?" I didn't quite understand what the girl was getting at.

"To reclaim my heritage, you weak-minded moron!" she yelled furiously. Her face twisted in an evil sneer, then abruptly went slack again. I took in a deep breath, scared despite myself. "No, it's easier to just play along with them. To be the shy girl they want."

"Who wants?" I asked softly.

"My captor. My rescuer. Don't they realize, they should have just killed me?" The confident voice broke, and her shoulders sagged. "Death would be a release."

_I am in way over my head._

"Stop," I whispered, and she was quiet once more. Sweat beaded my forehead, and I felt absolutely lost. _How do I proceed from here?_

The door opened quietly, and Gurney popped his head around the corner. He wasn't the best of assistants, but Taris certainly didn't offer me a grand selection of trainee medics.

"Yes?" I asked sharply. _Why didn't he knock?_

Gurney eyed Jen over curiously. "You've got a patient at the door, doc."

I nodded briefly at him. "I'll be out in a minute."

He disappeared, and I turned to survey Jen once more. _This will not be a quick treatment. She will have to come here many, many times. _But for the time being, I had to help her stay as her real persona, rather than drift into the imaginary identity she had created. _I must help her stay in control, and be Jen Sahara._

"You are Jen Sahara," I stated. "The other thoughts and personality are not real, and they are not you."

"I cannot be Jen," she whispered, confused.

"This is who are you, you must accept it. You have created another personality to run away from your own problems. Together we will work this through, but for now I need you to stay as Jen Sahara."

"Stay as Jen Sahara?" the response was so quiet, I barely heard.

"Yes. You are Jen Sahara."

"I am Jen Sahara," she mumbled.

"Yes, you are. I want you to wake up out of this trance, and feel relaxed and refreshed after a count of three. You will consciously recall nothing of our conversation, but you will wake knowing yourself as Jen Sahara." I counted, and the girl opened dazed, confused eyes. I laid a comforting hand on her shoulder, and she cringed. _She has been hurt in the past._

"How are you feeling, Jen?"

"Wh- what's going on?" Her green eyes were fearful.

Worry coursed through me. "You are at the medical facility on Taris, Jen. Do you remember?"

"I-I, yes, I guess. I think. Nothing seems quite real." She bit her lip, and looked down shyly.

"Do you remember coming in here for hypnotism?" I asked softly. _Have I done the right thing? What have I done to her? _I was suddenly very, very concerned.

"Oh! Yes, I do. Am I all better now, doctor?"

A small feeling of relief balanced the worry. "Not quite, Jen, but we'll get there. I need you to promise to visit me daily, okay? We have a lot of work to do."

She nodded, still not meeting my eyes.

"Promise me, Jen?" I prompted.

"I promise." She looked up, and her innocent, nervous eyes struck me as strange. _She was wary, desperate even, when she came in. But not shy. _

"Oh! Is it daylight already?" She was looking at the console. "The others will be worried. I need to go." She sat up, and slipped off the bed.

"Jen," I forestalled her as she began walking away. "Come back today, if you can? I'm worried about you."

She swallowed, and nodded once more. "Okay." She frowned in concentration, and dragged a hand through her pockets. "Um, I think you might like this." She offered, and thrust something into my hands. It felt like a hypodermic needle.

I stared after her in concern as she disappeared, without examining what she had given me. _I need to access the medical databases, and read up on this disorder._

_I am scared I may have just made things a whole lot worse._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_snackfiend101 & Lord Valentai - Yeah I was on a bit of a roll yesterday! hehe. Glad you like :)_

_Data - Yep, I like to include dialog from the game where it's appropriate if I can. Agreed about the Sith base:)_

_Brynn - Hrmm good suggestion about Zaalbar, I'll see if I can include it in the next few chapters. Thanks!_


	17. Infiltration

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen - Infiltration**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

I walked quickly back to the apartments, nervously avoiding any midday shoppers out on the Tarisian courtyards. My body felt relaxed and less bruised than last night, but my thoughts were a stormy maelstrom. _What's been going on? _I hadn't been acting like myself at all ever since the attack on the Endar Spire. I swallowed convulsively, recalling the various battles I had been through recently. _I don't know how to fight! What has been happening to me?_ I was just glad I had been to see Doctor Forn. _I can't believe I even considered selling the serum! How abominable! _Doctor Forn had urged me to return for more treatment, and I rather thought I needed it. For my own peace of mind. _All these strange thoughts I've been having. The frightening way I have been behaving. It's not real, it's not me._

I slunk back into the apartment building, evading the gaze of the resident aliens. _I want to go home. _My father must be desperately worried about me. _I can't believe he let me go. _But I had signed a contract with the Jedi Order. I would have to talk to them. _Wow, that is rather astonishing, though. The Jedi Council employed me? _Awe struck me, and I stumbled over something on the ground. I looked down.

The corpse of a Duros stared at me blankly. Horror shifted and swirled through my insides, and I let out a small scream. _Bodies, death! I feel like I'm living a nightmare! _

I ran.

Everything seemed so surreal, so wrong, so incredible. These fantasies I'd been living about using the Force, and having a bond with a powerful Jedi. _Bastila Shan. She is back at the apartment. Maybe she could help?_

The repugnant memory of the innocent I had killed resurfaced.

_Was that real? How could it have been? _I had somehow... lifted one of the Vulkars. Then I had ruthlessly attacked a passerby. _I wouldn't kill a stranger! I couldn't! It didn't happen, it must have been a dream!_

_**Where are you, Jen?** _Odd, that almost sounded like Bastila's voice. But this bond was merely a delusion of mine, I had to get a grip.

_This is ridiculous. I will not be some sort of spineless cowering moron!_

I swallowed, and reached the apartment door. _I am Jen Sahara! _The voices fled, retreating into darkness.

I opened the door, and saw Bastila sitting on the bed, her head bowed. She jerked up quickly and gazed fearfully at me.

"Jen!" she gasped. "Where have you been? Are you alright?"

I bit my lip, and looked down. "No, not really. Um, no."

"What happened?" she breathed, and I heard her walk cautiously closer.

"Nothing," I mumbled, and closed the door behind me. I looked around, and saw the apartment empty apart from the Jedi. "Where are the others?"

I could feel her steady gaze on me, questioning, pulling for answers. "Mission has gone to buy the droid; she is the only one who can afford it. Carth went with her, I believe he said something about being sick of your disappearing acts."

I blushed furiously in embarrassment. _I've been so rude to him. Why? What's wrong with me?_

"Jen, where did you go?" she asked softly from in front of me. I looked up into her dark eyes, and felt a strong desire to tell her everything. _She is a Jedi. I can trust her. She can help me._

"I-I went to, uh, to see Zelka Forn," I stuttered. "He's a doctor. He's been helping me."

"Helping you with what?" Her tone had changed. The angry sharpness of it cut through the stagnant air. I cringed.

"To- um, to control my anger. I don't really want to talk about it, Jedi Shan."

I could almost believe that inside my head I felt stunned astonishment waft from her. _No, the bond is not real. It is a fantasy. If I had the ability to use the Force, surely the Jedi would have picked up on it? I am Jen Sahara, nothing more and nothing less._

"Jedi Shan?" she replied with a touch of asperity. "You can call me Bastila, you have certainly done it before."

"Okay," I said hesitantly.

"Jen, you need to tell me what happened at doctor's facility." She seemed to hesitate. "You are my charge now, and I sense a great change in you. You can trust me, Jen."

I could trust her, I realized. _Weak minded fool! _A voice sneered inside my head, and I saw Bastila take a step backwards, fear flashing through her eyes. _No! You're not real! I will not listen to you!_

Other voices broke through my struggle, and the door opened again.

"I don't see why I can't tag along, it's my droid after all!" I turned to see Mission glaring angrily at Zaalbar.

"(It's too dangerous!)" Zaalbar whined. I stumbled backwards. _How do I know Shyriiwook?_ I thought in anxious fright. Tremors quavered down my spine, and other memories slammed into me. _And Mandalorian? And Twi'leki? What's going on?_

A warm hand touched my arm solidly; I tilted my head to see Bastila staring at me steadily.

"It will be alright, Jen," she murmured. "I will help you, I promise."

Amazing how a few little words could bring such relief.

"Another midnight escapade, Jen?" Carth threw at me as he walked inside, shooting me a dark glare.

"I, I, uh, I'm sorry." I flushed, and looked away.

"Oh great, we're back to the apologies," I heard him mutter. Humiliation coiled and writhed inside me; that I could disappoint a man I respected so much shamed me. I remembered then how much my earlier apologies had bugged him. Bastila's hand on my arm was an anchor through my roiling emotions.

"Jen, tell Big Z that I'm coming along as well!" Mission demanded, coming to stand in front of me. I glanced helplessly at Bastila. _Who am I to tell a Wookiee anything? Oh my, did he really swear a lifedebt to me?_

"You are not coming, Mission, because you are too noticeable," Bastila said smoothly. "Your skills would be very useful, but non-humans stand out here in the Upper City. This is the same reason that Zaalbar cannot go with us. It will be just me, Carth and Jen going into the Sith base."

_Me? No! I can't fight! _I stared fearfully at Bastila, but her impassive face allowed me no quarter. She leaned close to whisper in my ear.

"Do not worry, Jen. I will protect you. I am a Jedi, after all."

"(I will be going, I will need to protect Jen!)" Zaalbar howled.

"It will be just the three of us, Zaalbar," Bastila repeated.

Zaalbar looked ready to complain again. "We should do what Jedi Sh- uh, Bastila says," I said softly in his general direction.

"Jen, what's wrong with you?" Mission stalked right up in front me, frowning. "Are you okay?"

"Nothing is wrong with her," Bastila overrode the Twi'lek, and pulled me away. I saw Carth staring at me in consternation. "Come, we must prepare for the forthcoming mission."

I shivered.

xXx

The new droid that followed Mission about seemed quite high-tech, if the Twi'lek was correct in everything it could do. Mission sulkily ordered it to obey us for the day, and stormed off to play pazaak in the Lower City. I hoped fervently that she wouldn't stay angry at me for too long. Zaalbar, after further assurances from Bastila that he wouldn't be needed, seemed happy enough to run after Mission and ensure she wouldn't get into any trouble.

Bastila passed me a vibroblade from the ominous pile of weapons on the floor; I held it rather hesitantly. I heard her mutter about the lack of a lightsaber as she chose a double-bladed weapon. Carth had been rather silent for the most part, occasionally throwing confused, almost angry, glances my way. I tried hard to shrink myself into an unnoticeable nobody, and was glad that Bastila seemed to want me directly next to her at all times.

"Let us depart," Bastila commanded, and shooed the droid out ahead of us. "I only hope we can accomplish this mission in stealth. I am not entirely sure we could handle a squadron of Sith guards."

"You'd be surprised what Jen can do," Carth commented wryly, but his eyes on me were... worried. I looked away in time to see Bastila shoot him a curious glance.

"Regardless," she continued. "I have faith that T3-M4's computer skills and my persuasion techniques will keep us out of any unnecessary bloodshed."

"Unnecessary bloodshed?" Carth queried in disbelief as I followed them out the door. "Bastila, you can't seriously think we'll be able to break into a heavily guarded Sith base and not have to kill someone?" His tone had risen derisively.

"It is what I hope, yes," she said primly. "T3-M4 should be able to access the Sith mainframe from any terminal. With the Force by our side, we may only have to reach one computer to achieve our goal."

"And you think it'll be unguarded?" Carth muttered under his breath.

I trudged behind them reluctantly as we made our way through the Upper City, and found myself walking beside the new droid. Mission had introduced him as Teethree, which was less of a mouthful than his model number, despite Bastila's insistence on using it.

"Hi there, little fellow," I murmured at him. The only droids we'd had back on Deralia were protocol robots, but they had always been rather friendly.

"Beep! Beep-bop whoop," T3-M4 whistled at me. _Aww, wish I could understand him._

"Alright, the base is just up there," Bastila stopped and spoke softly to us all. Up ahead in a relatively quiet cul-de-sac, I saw the entrance to a large dark building with obsidian pillars. It appeared ominous, threatening. I closed my eyes. _I want to go home. _The vibroblade sat uncomfortably sheathed on my side, and the spare blaster dug into my hip. _I can't use a weapon! _I swallowed. A foreign feeling of irritated fury swelled inside me. _This is bantha crap. I'm going to disembowel someone... anyone!_

"Jen!" Bastila snapped suddenly. I jerked my eyes opened, startled. She was frowning, frightened even, but the emotions vanished as I looked at her. She walked closer and placed a hand on my arm. "Relax," she said softly. "Trust in me, trust in the Force."

I nodded slowly, and the dark thoughts disappeared. I glanced around to see Carth looking suspiciously at both of us, his eyes flicking between Bastila and me.

"I am going to have a little conversation with the guard," Bastila stated. "As soon as he lets me inside, you two will follow. And please, act nonchalant! T3-M4, follow me."

The Jedi stalked off, the little droid beeping as he followed her. I looked away over the Tarisian courtyards, but felt Carth walk towards me.

"Okay, want to tell me what's going on?" he said in a low tone.

"N-nothing," I mumbled. _What is he talking about?_

"Nothing! And here I thought you couldn't get more irritating!" he growled in annoyance. I could feel the heat of embarrassment claim me.

"S-shouldn't we, uh, be keeping an eye on Jedi Sh- I mean, Bastila?" I stuttered.

"Jedi Shan?" he echoed in disbelief. "What are you playing at, Jen? Are you trying to toy with Bastila? Or is it me?"

My eyes flew to his; he was glaring furiously at me. "No!" I said in horror. "I'm not playing at anything! I don't understand what you mean!"

A stony shutter fell over his face, and he stared at me coldly. "Fine. Have it your way." He turned to face the Sith base entrance once more. Humiliating shame curved hotly inside of me. _I don't understand, what have I done to offend him?_

_I don't give a ronto's ass. _A dark sneer.

_I must be going crazy. _An annoyed retort.

_No, I am Jen Sahara! _A desperate plea.

_**Jen! Stop it! Focus!** _Again, I seemed to be hearing Bastila. I gulped, and stared down at the ground.

_I must trust Bastila. These voices aren't real. _I would be glad to see Zelka again later.

"She's in," Carth muttered. He strode over to the entrance, and I glanced around nervously. A few citizens walked about their business in the courtyard, but the cul-de-sac itself was empty. The Sith guard had escorted Bastila inside, and I wondered how she'd managed that feat. I blinked, and raced after Carth into the building.

The entranceway appeared to be a reception area of some description. High engraved pillars adorned the room inside, and the ceiling itself seemed miles away. Two automatic doors exited the room. A primped made-up woman stood behind a desk, flanked by two Sith guards in full glistening armour. Bastila had already approached the receptionist, chaperoned by the sentry from outside.

The receptionist turned heavily outlined eyes on Bastila, fluffing her hair with a manicured hand. I noticed with trepidation that the two Sith guards straightened to wary attention.

"Yes?" the woman drawled.

"I am here to see the governor," Bastila said firmly. "He is expecting me."

"Where is your identification?" one of the guards snapped out. I swallowed nervously, and noticed Carth's wary stance.

Bastila's head turned to appraise the Sith guards. "You are not needed here. Your superior wishes to see you now." Her voice somehow sounded heavier than normal, overlaid with weighty suggestiveness.

"Uh, I think the captain wants to see us," the guard on the left said mechanically.

"Yes, he requests to see all three of you now," Bastila intoned again, turning to eye over the sentry who had ushered her in.

"We had better see him," the second guard responded.

"Uh, yes," the sentry stuttered. I stared in stunned astonishment as all three guards turned, and left through one of the doors. _Wow! She is so powerful! _

The receptionist frowned in confusion at Bastila. "Just who are you?" she demanded, pointing a lacquered fingernail at the Jedi.

"You need to go powder your nose," Bastila snapped.

The receptionist blinked dazedly. "I'll be right back," she muttered, and fled out the other door.

Carth snickered. "Nice one." He grinned wryly at Bastila. _That was amazing! _No wonder people feared the Jedi so much. _That was pathetic, _A shadowy whisper muttered. _No. I am Jen Sahara._

"T3-M4, see if you can slice into the main system from here," Bastila commanded. "We're looking for the latest launch codes to exit Taris."

The droid whistled in acknowledgement, and wheeled over to the reception terminal. I noticed with fascination as Teethree extended a probe in the bypass slot of the console.

"Jen, guard the other door," Carth hissed. I whirled around to see Carth leaning to the side of an exit, his blaster held ready. _I'm no guard! _With difficulty, I swallowed my fear and rushed to the other exit, fumbling to hold my blaster. I hoped fervently that no one would enter.

"Bastila, this place probably has security cameras," Carth stated. "If you don't want the Sith to know we're here, get Teethree to disable them first. Here's hoping no one's watching right now."

Bastila nodded. "Good thinking." She lent down to order commands to the droid.

I stood nervously by the door as the minutes ticked by. Silence lay thick like heavy molasses on the room, broken occasionally by the clicks and whirls of Teethree as he continued his hacking. My palms grew sticky with sweat, and the blaster felt unwieldy in my grasp.

I gasped softly as I heard footsteps in the distance.

"Someone's approaching my door," Carth muttered. "How far is Teethree?"

"Almost there," Bastila murmured. "But we need more time."

"Well you don't have it!" Carth hissed back. "Looks like we're going to have a fight after all." The heavy thud of a trooper grew slightly louder, and Carth raised his blasters.

"T3-M4, can you disable the right access door into here?" Bastila fired at the droid. "Quickly?"

The droid beeped, whirled and then whistled. I heard a thunk from the wall behind Carth.

"The door's not opening, sergeant," a mechanical Sith voice filtered through the door.

"Damn. Why does everything break on this gods-cursed planet? These Tarisians can't do anything right. Davis, call maintenance," another voice commanded, and the sound of soldiers walking away met my ears with profound relief.

Carth grinned roguishly. "Looks like we've won ten minutes until the technician finishes his caffa and donut."

"That was close," Bastila said softly. "T3-M4, access those codes and let's get out of here."

A minute later, and the droid whistled victoriously. A smug smile curved the Jedi's face, as she walked confidently away from the desk.

"Mission accomplished." She strode over to the exit, and waved us both onwards. "Let us go and see this Mandalorian thug then."

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - Cheers, hope you like what happens next._

_Data - Don't worry, the Revan's aren't too far away..._

_snackfiend101 - LOL cheesed...heheh! The reactions from various party members will be taking place over a few chapters as events progress._

_Brynn - Thanks for the feedback, sorry you feel that way. Not sure why you think it's a cop out? It certainly hasn't resolved Jen's identity crisis. Unless you are referring to the Jedi Council's potential reaction? In which case let me assure you, it has nothing to do with my plans for Dantooine, but a whole lot to do with Jen/Revan's character development. RE: Professional doctor, well hrm I kinda thought most mainstream medical doctors wouldn't know indepth detail about hypnosis/mental disorders, and that Zelka knows a little more than most general practitioners. Enough to get himself into trouble, at any rate._

_Red Mage Neko - Hehe ugly indeed, though I can think of one person who might actually appreciate this turnaround in Jen's behaviour..._

_Prisoner 24601 - Yeah I enjoyed trying to do it from Zelka's perspective and what he would be thinking at the time. Thanks :)_

_Xan - glad you're enjoying it! You're right in that Jen will not be able to lead the group off Taris in this state, but others might..._


	18. A plan of action

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen – A plan of action**

_- Canderous Ordo -_

* * *

The ale in here reminded me of homebrew stout, though I wouldn't allow myself to be drawn into sickly reminiscence. _The past stays buried, just like my enemies. _It was heading on towards late afternoon, and I held myself to the bargain. _Javyar's cantina at night._

I doubted whether they would pull it off, but if anyone could successfully infiltrate that Sith base and get away with it, it might just be that crazy human.

"Uh, Canderous, sir?" a voice queried tremoulously. I looked up to see a timid Twi'lek waitress. "Would you like another drink?"

I bared my teeth, and she scurried off. I couldn't help but chuckle to myself. _This place is a cesspool of weaklings. _I noticed the distinct lack of gang members inside. _They're all out fighting in the gang war. _Part of me wished to join in, it was turning into a glorious battle indeed. I wondered briefly if Brejik had noticed my involvement on the swoop track. _I hope so. I could really do with knocking some Vulkar heads together. _I sucked in deeply on a Cherze cigarra, tasting the wooden smoke particular to my favourite brand.

A Rodian strode into the bar, and I recognized Jerrin. His eyes darted around the room suspiciously as he walked towards me. I slowly pulled a small handful of credits out of my pocket, while resting my other hand on my blaster. Jerrin was a useful contact, but I'd be stupid to trust him.

"Jerrin." I indicated he should sit, and stubbed my cigarra out. "Status?"

"I saw three people and a droid enter the Sith base about half an hour ago," he hissed softly. "Two girls, one man. I didn't get close enough to recognize any of them."

"Then what am I paying you for?" I stated. _Idiot. _I scowled.

"Hey, they would have seen me if I'd snuck up on them!" he protested.

My eyes flicked to the cantina's entrance, and I saw the soldier walk in, followed by the Jedi princess and Jen Sahara herself. I smiled humourlessly. _Did they succeed? They wouldn't be stupid enough to meet me otherwise, I hope. _I flicked Jerrin half the pile of credits under the table.

"Get lost."

He looked down quickly at the money. "Canderous, this isn't what you prom-"

"And you didn't deliver what you said, either. Be grateful I'm feeling generous. Now piss off before I get angry."

The Rodian gulped, and left. I turned my eyes to appraise the oncoming group. I noticed a scowl on Carth's face. _Heh, little Republic boy really doesn't like me. _I could already tell he was a soldier from his stance; considering his involvement in Bastila's rescue it was a fair assumption he worked for the Republic.

"Canderous," the Jedi brat said smoothly. _And as for Jedi princess... _well, she was a bit of a looker. Shame about her snooty attitude.

I smirked at her. "Enjoy your little vacation into the Sith base?" I asked dryly. Her expression seemed to tighten, but other than that she kept control of her emotions. _Impressive._

I noticed vaguely that Jen was hiding behind her.

"We have what you asked for," Bastila replied neutrally. A sense of satisfaction filled me. _I am one step closer to blowing this planet._ "So, what is the rest of your plan?" she finished.

"Perhaps I should be talking to your leader," I interrupted, more to annoy Bastila than anything else. Her dark eyes shot angry daggers at me. I heard a squeak from Jen, and twisted my head sharply to stare at the girl. She was looking away nervously, clutching onto Bastila's arm. _What the...? _Her entire pose was one of a meek, spineless coward.

"Bastila is our leader," Jen mumbled in my direction. My brows lowered as Jen took a step backwards. _Who is she trying to fool? Does she take me for a moron? _I'd seen her in action at the swoop track. Mandalore's balls, I'd fought beside her and been impressed. There was no way I was buying this pathetic shy act.

Bastila patted Jen comfortingly on the arm. _However, Bastila sure seems to be swallowing it. _I scowled. This was not the Jen I wanted to see. _Back to business, Ordo. If she wants to act like an imbecile then it's not your problem. Yet._

I folded my arms. "So, you have the launch codes. It won't be long before the Sith find out. I can get us close to the hangar, but not without some bloodshed. We should go now."

Bastila nodded at me impassively. "You make sense. We must pick up Mission and Zaalbar first."

I quirked an eyebrow in surprise. _The Bek brat and her walking carpet are coming as well? _A Wookiee would certainly improve our odds. Regardless, I was looking forward to the oncoming fight with relish. I only hoped I would have the chance to repay Davik.

"Lead the way, princess."

She sniffed at me, and I grinned. I noticed then that the T3 astromech droid had followed them into the cantina. _Handy little tool, if you are weak enough to rely on droids._

We walked out of the smoky cantina, and I held my blaster ready. The gangs were scouring the streets still, but it was usually a quick trip to the Upper City. I decided it was time to set things straight with Jen, no matter what game she was carrying on with Bastila.

"I don't know what you're playing at, but I expect to see your true form in the oncoming battle," I spoke quietly at Jen's side as I walked up to her. She jumped backwards, her eyes round and fearful. A growl rose from my throat; I did not like being played for a fool.

"Leave her alone. We will be fine in any confrontations that may chance our way," Bastila told me primly. _Damn, but she can certainly hear well._ I allowed my eyes to travel slowly over Bastila's form; I enjoyed the outraged colour that action brought to her pale cheeks. I noticed with some interest that a double-bladed vibroblade was strapped to her back.

"Nice choice of weapons, princess. I thought you Jedi only used lightsabers?"

"We use whatever suits the occasion, mercenary," she replied disdainfully, and turned to stalk off. I grinned at her back.

Republic boy must have overhead us, for he cut in. "Where is your lightsaber anyway, Bastila?"

I could see her shoulders stiffen in discomfort as she answered. "My lightsaber was... misplaced. I couldn't find it after the crash."

I guffawed, and heard an answering noise from Carth. He responded incredulously, "Wait a minute, let me get this straight. You **lost** your lightsaber?" he laughed. "I mean, isn't that a violation of some kind of Jedi code or something?"

Bastila stopped walking, and whirled around to face us. She put her hands on her hips, and affronted anger coloured her face an amusing pink. "This is no laughing matter! During the crash my lightsaber must have... it must have fallen from my belt and rolled under my seat!"

I laughed uproariously, which seemed to further infuriate her. Carth calmed somewhat, and attempted belated damage control. "Hey, hey, hey, don't get mad. I'm sorry. It's just funny to think of a legendary Jedi losing her lightsaber. Take my advice: this is one detail you might want to keep out of the history texts."

Bastila sniffed, her nose pointed high as she glared imperiously at us. "I hardly consider myself a legend, Carth."

I snickered. Republic boy still seemed rather amused by the whole conversation, until I saw him glance at Jen and scowl. I looked at her myself. Her panicked eyes were flicking between us all, and she almost cowered at Carth's look. I gave her a disbelieving, derisive look. _Your acting skills are impressive, and you may have fooled this idiotic lot. But you won't fool me. _In a way, it was all rather humorous. I was intrigued to see how far she would go with this alien demeanor. Between Jen's fairly impressive acting skills and harassing Bastila, I was keeping myself nicely amused.

We turned into the last corridor of the Lower City, and a small mob of about eight gang members met my eyes. I stiffened warily as I recognized the aggressive stance of the muscular leader, and felt a gleeful grin wrap itself around my face. _Brejik__ and his Vulkars. About time, too._

The gang members jerked to face us, and I lifted my blaster in readiness. I heard Republic boy swear under his breath, followed by the sound of Bastila unsheathing her vibroblade.

"Well, well, well," Brejik called out cockily over the distance that separated us. "What do we have here, hrm? My runaway Jedi slave, the swoop rescuer extraordinaire, and Canderous Ordo himself. You should have known better than to mess with me, mercenary," he sneered.

"What am I, chopped bantha spleen?" Carth muttered behind me.

I laughed at Brejik. "You don't know how to keep your boys in line, Brejik. You turned me into your enemy by firing on me at the swoop race. Hope you enjoy the outcome," I jeered at him.

"You don't frighten me. Davik doesn't rule these streets, and word has it that he was less than impressed by your antics at the swoop track." Brejik laughed mockingly. "Poor little Canderous. You didn't realize that Davik doesn't wish the Vulkars for enemies, did you?"

My eyes narrowed. _He thinks he can mock me and get away with it? _In a flash, I jerked my gun upwards and fired at him. _This will be a worthy fight._

Brejik yelped, jumped sideways and activated his shield, but I knew I had hit him. With a mingled roar, the Vulkars opened fire.

A blue glow enveloped me as I switched on my shield just in time and ran forwards, hooking my weapon onto my belt while unsheathing an Echani foil I'd picked up from an earlier fight. A grenade flew over my head towards the others, and the bright flash of it hit the periphery of my vision. I heard a startled scream from Jen. _You'd better stop acting now, girl, or I swear I'll take it out of your hide._

Four of the men ran up to meet me; I snarled and slammed an elbow into the first, following it with a thrust of the blade into his guts. The thud of a stun stick whacking my battle armour jerked me back a step; I responded by leaping sideways and head butting the culprit in the teeth. The man screamed and lifted his stun stick dangerously close to my face, but suddenly crumpled as smoke wafted from his head. I looked up quickly to see Carth in the distance, taking potshots at the Vulkars.

Another grenade exploded near me; I stumbled backwards into one of the thugs, and we both fell. A piercing pain in my side told me he was clutching a bladed weapon.

I rolled over with a grunt, gritting my teeth as I swung my blade free. A female Vulkar stood over me, blaster pointed at my head and a victorious sneer on her grimy face.

_There is no better way to die than in battle._

My vision blurred as Bastila leaped around me, her double-bladed staff knocking the weapon from the offending gang member's hand. A flash of surprised admiration filled me; I ignored it and twisted to my feet, quickly stabbing the prone Vulkar I had fallen over.

A cut-off grunt followed by a thud told me Carth had fallen; I jerked around to see both him and Jen down. _Damn, how'd she get beaten so fast?_ I knew she was slightly crazy, but I didn't believe she'd go so far as to act like a moronic weakling in a life-threatening situation. At least Republic boy had taken out a few before he'd been cut down; there were two attacking Bastila, and only Brejik plus one other left.

Brejik laughed maniacally at me as he fired. An aching burn enveloping my chest made me realize that my shield was wearing thin. I roared as adrenaline galloped through my system, and charged.

Brejik, slimy coward that he was, leaped backwards behind his friend and kept firing. My chest tightened agonizingly; I pushed through it and ran on, blood thundering through my head. To say the Vulkar looked stunned as the Echani foil rammed through his abdomen was an understatement; but at that moment I heard Bastila scream piercingly from behind me. _That's her down._

The dead man crumpled in a heap, and I faced Brejik. My breath was coming in short, sharp bursts, tearing through damaged lungs and injured muscles. Brejik's expression transformed to smug victory as I heard footsteps behind me. _The victors of Bastila's battle, no doubt._

"Here it ends, Canderous. Shame you chose the losing side." His lip curled as I snarled at him, and he raised his blaster.

Shock contorted his face as his eyes darted past me; I heard the welcome sound of blaster shots in the distance, and grunts from the Vulkars behind. Brejik yelped and dropped his blaster as laser fire scored a bloody hit on his forearm.

The heat of battle was fast disappearing from my limbs; I staggered as I yanked my blaster up from my hip to fire at Brejik. By the time I had gotten that far, he was already running.

My vision darkened as I fell to my knees, injured muscles turning to water. I yelled and fired wildly after Brejik's retreating form, hoping ruthlessly for a hit on that cowardly weakling. The sounds of men running and shouting vaguely registered. _Beks, no doubt. What timing._

The ground rushed up to meet me.

xXx

Ice cold numbess and raging hot prickles jerked me back to consciousness. I yelled in protest and opened my eyes, shivering and sweating with the uncomfortable contrasting feelings.

Bastila was leaning over me, her face a composed mask. "Relax. It's the Force flowing through you, healing your injuries."

I grunted, and yanked myself to a sitting position. My vision mottled and swam as dizziness invaded my senses.

"Lie down for a minute!" Bastila snapped angrily. "The Force may be fairly quick acting, but it is not miraculous!"

The nasty slash on my shoulder and the serious burns had already been healed to an acceptable level. I ignored the residual pain, and dragged myself to my feet, taking pains to control any stumbling.

"Relax, princess," I drawled, flexing my shoulders slightly. "I'm fine. What happened?"

She muttered something obscene under her breath; I wished I had caught it. "The Beks finished the fight and hence saved us. Fortunately for you, they revived me first," she sniffed.

I raised an eyebrow sarcastically at her. "Yes, I'm sure we couldn't live without your amazing Force powers. How did I survive for so long without you?"

The pure fury that crackled in her dark eyes made me laugh.

"You- !" she cut herself off abruptly, breathing in deeply. I smirked, and turned around to see Carth and Jen leaning gingerly against the grimy walls of the Lower City. The astromech droid was by Jen's feet, looking relatively undamaged. _Someone's gotta put a weapon on that junkpile. It could at least serve some purpose in a fight._

"They were both knocked out by grenades," Bastila said quietly, following my gaze. Her temper was enjoyable, but her responsive control over it was even more impressive. "Between the kolto the Beks gave me, and my Force abilities, I think we are all alright now."

"Where are those helpful Beks?"

"They chased after Brejik," Bastila answered.

I scowled. "So the bastard got away."

"No doubt." She eyed me over once more, imperiously. "At least take some kolto if you refuse my help, Canderous. We still have a battle ahead at Davik's."

I snorted. "I'll relax when I'm out of this stinkhole of a planet. In the meantime, stims can keep me going."

"Fine," she said primly, and turned to face the others. "We should move on now."

Carth nodded silently at her; Jen had a petrified look on her face that was getting rather familiar. I narrowed my eyes at her and she looked nervously away, causing my humour to rise once more.

"Don't be so childish," Bastila snapped as I laughed at Jen. I turned derisive eyes on Bastila as she stalked away. _Heh. She's the one who believes Jen's little act._

We headed back to the scummy apartment building in the alien district. I was surprised Jen hadn't garnered a better hideout; it had been relatively easy to track her down. _Humans hiding out with aliens do stand out. But I guess the aliens keep to themselves, and aren't likely to rat on them. _My muscles were beginning to tighten and ache uncomfortably; I grimaced and searched my pockets for a stamina stim as we trudged along. From the stiff, abrupt way Republic boy was walking, I could tell he too was feeling the after effects of our clash with the Vulkars. _My only regret is that Brejik escaped. I wouldn't mind seeing him again._

The Twi'lek and the Wookiee were yapping inside the apartment, but quietened as we entered. I saw the girl shoot me an awed, slightly fearful look. I bared my teeth at her, but kept my eyes on her shag pile guard. I'd heard stories about Vulkars stupid enough to threaten Mission Vao, and at any rate I had no real problem with her.

"Pack up," Bastila commanded. "We are heading out."

"Cool!" Mission enthused, jumping to her feet. The Wookiee growled something, and I saw the Twi'lek girl grin mischievously at him. She leapt forward to coo at the astromech and I didn't bother quelling a contemptuous sneer.

"Say, what happened to you guys?" Mission asked when she turned around. "Sith base didn't go as planned?"

"We, uh, ran into a little trouble afterwards," Carth elaborated.

I grinned humourlessly. "Vulkars who didn't like the look of us."

Mission looked at me inquisitively, but Bastila interrupted in an autocratic tone. "We should be leaving now."

"Okay, sheesh, keep your clothes on," Mission commented, turning to glare at the Jedi's haughty look. The upright carpet howled unintelligibly at Mission; she laughed at him and poked him playfully. She then promptly ordered him to carry as many weapons as he could; I eyed the pile of blades on the floor with admiration. The Wookiee grumbled in complaint, but strapped a fair few blades onto his back. _We all know who wears the pants in that relationship._

Republic boy filled a pack up with grenades, while Jedi princess gathered the few medpacs they had collected. Jen herself stood awkwardly in the doorway, clutching a vibroblade inexpertly. I shot her another glare, just to see if it would disconcert her. She almost jumped backwards, and I chuckled to myself. I was beginning to enjoy this game of hers; I wondered if she was laughing on the inside as well.

Without much further ado, I led this rather motley and shabby crew back out onto the Tarisian courtyards. The Twi'lek was skipping up ahead, and I snorted to myself. _Kids._

As we walked towards the more lavish side of Taris, personal guards replaced the Sith lining the street. Davik, along with the other richer businessmen of Taris, had paid the Sith an awful lot of money for relative peace. _In exchange for any information, of course. _The uppercrust had bought the illusion of freedom, and most of them were stupid enough to believe in it.

The Twi'lek girl turned around suddenly, and appraised Bastila.

"Hey, Bastila. You ever just use the Force for fun?" She tilted her head, an impish grin on her face. The thought of Mission as a Jedi flashed through my mind, and I snickered to myself. _I'd give a whole lot of credits to watch a confrontation between a Force-using Mission and the prissy Jedi princess._

"Fun?" Bastila sounded confused, almost affronted.

"You know, a little jolt of the Force to trip some jerk who's ticking you off?" Mission beamed. "I can think of a few nerf-herders I know who'd certainly deserve it!"

Bastila took in a deep breath, straightening her spine to look down at Mission. "I would never use the Force for such a petty and trivial revenge! The mere thought of it is preposterous!"

I snorted. _Uptight little Jedi. Someday, I gotta get those snooty kinks out of your back._

"Aw, come on," Mission wheedled. "There's gotta be times when you've thought about it. Don't be so stuck up - you can tell me!"

I heard Carth stifle a laugh. I didn't bother hiding mine.

"I am not stuck up," Bastila stated in a forced, neutral tone. "I merely have the years of training to give me the wisdom and understanding to see how childish such an act would be."

"Childish?" Mission's voice rose indignantly. "Is that a crack about my age? You ain't much older than me, miss high and mighty!" The Twi'lek glared at her. "Just 'cause you're some Jedi doesn't mean you can be a prissy little..."

Her rant was sharply cut off as she suddenly flew backwards, landing on her ass with a thud. I guffawed incredulously. _Obviously Bastila isn't above using the Force to meet her own ends._

"Hey, that wasn't funny!" Mission stormed as she scrambled to her feet.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mission. Come now, we have to get going," Bastila ended imperiously, turning to walk away. "Please do try to be less clumsy in the future," she added as a further comment. _Now that's just begging for trouble, princess._

Mission turned an amusing purple colour, and attempted to jump after Bastila but the Wookiee grabbed her quickly.

"Zaalbar!" she screeched furiously.

The Wookiee growled something at Mission, and she glared angrily at him.

"How very Jedi-like of you, princess," I spoke softly into Bastila's ear. A flicker of some indeterminable emotion on her face quickly dissolved into impassivity.

I laughed again. The tricks and harmless pranks of Mission Vao were well-known throughout Lower Taris. She was someone people easily underestimated. _I think little princess believes she just won a victory. I wonder if she'll welcome gizka dung in her bed._ For all that Mission was relatively harmless, I wouldn't be too quick to get on her bad side. _Childish mischief I can do without._

I saw Davik's estate looming in the distance, and decided it was time to issue some orders. I halted my stride, and turned to eye the others dispassionately.

"Alright, troops." I didn't bother concealing my sneer. I'd had half-dead rookie mercenaries under my command more worthy than this lot. Well, maybe I was being a bit unfair. "Here's how the plan goes. Girls, disarm and throw the lads your weapons. You three are going to act all scared and meek. Jen, it shouldn't be a problem for you." I tossed her a knowing grin, and she flinched rather realistically. I continued. "Republic, toss that upright carpet one of your blasters. You two are gonna be guarding the three brand new slave girls."

Bastila gasped in outrage; Carth scowled objectionably. I raised an eyebrow impatiently. "What? You think we can just waltz in, looking like an armoured gang ready for fighting? This cover story will get us into the base, provided you guys are convincing. That includes you, princess."

Bastila had turned a mottled red once more; I couldn't help but grin.

"If this is some sort of trap, _mercenary-_"

"No trap, princess. I ain't collaring you, am I? I doubt you are helpless, though you certainly act like it at times," I met her eyes steadily; she looked away in fury.

Carth opened his mouth to say something, but apparently thought better of it and chucked Zaalbar a blaster. The Wookiee howled annoyingly.

I rolled my eyes. "It's not like we're going to tie the girls up! Although that would be more convincing," I murmured to myself. The Wookiee roared in response, and Bastila looked ready to explode.

I laughed. "It won't be necessary, provided you play your part. Republic and Carpet, stand behind the girls with your blasters raised. Mission and Princess, act demure and frightened, for the love of Mandalore!"

Mission grinned impishly at me, I could swear she was enjoying the façade. She looked down suddenly, and gave a wonderful portrayal of a very frightened captive. Bastila glared at me, obviously struggling with the role, but finally dropped her eyes. I nodded in satisfaction.

"Let's move out," I grunted, and turned to lead them onwards. We reached the gates of Davik's mansion, and I nodded companionably to the guard.

"Back with some fresh slave girls Davik ordered," I said dryly.

The guard glanced at me suspiciously. "Order? I haven't heard nothin' 'bout any new girls."

"Oh? Privy to Davik's plans, are you?" I snapped, staring him fully in the eyes. He quailed.

"Uh, sorry Canderous, go right in." He activated the access console, and the large gates swung inwards. I grunted, and walked onwards, underneath the line of visible laser turrets that pointed ominously at the building's entrance.

Another guard met us at the door, and waved us in without any interference. I could feel the beginnings of a bloodthirsty smile wrapping itself on my face as we walked into Davik's stronghold.

_Play time._

* * *

xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - mwhaha (wave of hand) You **will** review constantly._

_Firera - Just changed the balance somewhat...not for too long, promise :)_

_Red Mage Neko - I wanted to give Bastila a bit of a confident boost - but I really can't envisage Davik's estate being anywhere near that easy. On the other hand, I think you're right, them running into Brejik is a good idea..._

_snackfiend101 - hehe bring on the bad jokes :)_

_Brynn - I think we'll have to agree to disagree on that one then. The main points I wanted to get across was that Zelka believed Jen was the real personality, he also knew (thought) he was going to see her again that day or the next, he felt very scared/out of his depth by the seething emotions of her other personalities, and he was trying to help her stay in control and stay safe for the meantime. I also don't really think he'd have the knowledge to assess or correctly diagnose mental disorders. Normally there would be a psychologist/psychotherapist around for him to refer people to, but Taris is such a cesspool that I thought it might be realistic to assume there wasn't one (or if there was, only for the absolute rich)._

_Xan - hehe :)_

_Akasha15 - Ahh you say it more succinctly than I :) Regarding Carth's POV - I'll be doing his in a few chapters time again (I think)...getting tough to fit all the characters in!_


	19. Hyperspace: I

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen – Hyperspace: I**

* * *

_**--Zaalbar--**_

I warily followed the others inside the opulent estate, holding Carth's blaster at Mission's back. _This plan is too risky. _The Mandalorian might be crazy, but I did not see why Mission and Jen had to be pulled into this hazardous escapade. _Especially since Jen has not been acting herself. _Mission was worried about her; I could tell by the nervous glances and the twitching of her headtails. _At least Jen is acting less reckless. _But this thought did not comfort me; somehow I had the feeling that Jen might be a lot more vulnerable in a fight than ever before.

_I will guard her back. _

Garish paint schemes adorned marble walls, and I felt more out of place here in this ostentatious mansion than I had in the Lower City. _To be in a forest somewhere. To be amongst the wroshyr trees. _But that could never happen again.

We walked past an opening to a large room; unfamiliar flowery scents and steam wafted past my nose. Canderous stopped ahead, and turned to face us with a leery grin. _I do not trust this man. He is dangerous._

"Welcome to the slave quarters, kids," Canderous drawled.

Bastila sniffed, and crossed her arms. "Why are we stopping here, mercenary?"

"Good a place as any to talk before we hit trouble. Now look, the hangar is located in the north-west side of this estate." Canderous eyed us all over as he spoke. Jen seemed to cower in front of me, and I again wondered what had happened to her. _Did she hit her head? Maybe Mission needs to talk to her. _I could not understand humans and their problems, but I knew they liked to talk a lot. _And Mission is certainly good at that_.

"You think it's going to be that easy?" Carth spoke up softly next to me.

"No," Canderous chuckled. "We're gonna get questioned sooner or later. Not to mention Davik's security system on the Ebon Hawk – the rust bucket droid can finally be put to use." He aimed a kick at the droid, and it whistled sharply in protest, backing away.

"Hey!" Mission protested. "Leave Teethree alone!"

The sound of someone turning the corner up ahead caught my attention. I looked up to see a heavily armoured human walking towards us. He stopped, with a startled expression on his face.

"Uh, Canderous?" the stranger queried. "Uh, who are all these people?"

"Just showing some slave girls their new quarters," the Mandalorian said smoothly.

The guard frowned in confusion, his shifty eyes flicking over Carth and I. "I thought you worked alone?"

"Davik's orders," Canderous grunted. "Speaking of which, I need to see him. Where is he?"

"In his quarters, last time I checked," the guard responded.

Canderous nodded at him. "Come on boys, let's move out."

I trailed the others half-heartedly, staring warily at the guard as I passed him. He had backed down, but his gaze was following Canderous with something close to suspicion. _This ploy will not work for much longer._

We walked on through the lavish estate; Canderous talking his way passed a few more guards until we reached a fighting arena of some description. Two brawlers were busy wrestling, with a small crowd of onlookers. The seated audience was cheering and guffawing at the wrestling spectacle, until one of them noticed Canderous. The man stood up and walked over to us.

I noticed a few of the others also get to their feet.

"Daelin," Canderous acknowledged, as the first stranger came closer.

"You've brought a motley crew in here, Canderous," the man drawled, crossing his arms. I noticed one of his hands edge surreptitiously closer to blaster hooked on his belt.

"New slave girls for Davik," Canderous repeated. "Nice show." He inclined his head towards the wrestlers, who had paused momentarily to eye us over.

Daelin grunted. "Davik wants to speak to you immediately, although he didn't expect you to bring visitors. I haven't been told about any new slave girls."

"Are you questioning me, Daelin? The last person who did that ended up picking his eyeballs out of his dinner," Canderous growled threateningly.

"You don't scare me, Ordo," the man sneered, and I saw his eyes fix warily on Mission, and then slide over to appraise me. "Davik warned us you might be thinking of betrayal. Do you really expect me to believe that the Beks' pet Wookiee would bring in Mission Vao? How stupid do you think we are?"

The hair on my neck rose in alarm. _No escaping a battle now. _I ran towards Mission and threw her my blaster, pulling vibroblades out of my back harness. Canderous yelled and opened fire on the group; there were screams as the men hurried to their feet.

"(Jen!)" I howled as the girl seemed to freeze in the midst of us all. I leapt towards her; she was still standing absolutely rigid, shock and disbelief on her face. I thrust a vibroblade into her hand.

Bastila had reclaimed her weapon from Carth, and was attacking one of Davik's men expertly, her vibro-staff whirling and spinning. Carth and Mission had retreated behind, their blaster fire streaming on either side of me as I fatally stabbed one of the brawlers.

A piercing wail knifed deeply into my hearing; I shook my head in aggravation and saw a man activating a switch on the far side of the room.

"Ah, crap!" Canderous cursed as he cut down another man. "The alarms! There goes our secrecy."

Jen screamed beside me; I turned in dismay to see one of the mercenaries stab her in the thigh. _Jen! _I roared in panic, and rushed towards her, but she was surrounded by three men. _No! I will not fail my lifedebt!_

The blood had drained from her face, leaving it a pasty white as she stumbled. The mercenary pulled his blade back to strike again. The expression of stunned horror on Jen's face twisted abruptly; darkened somehow.

"No!" she shrieked, and abruptly fell backwards, just in time to miss the lethal swing of the man. She twisted and rolled on the ground, yanking her blade towards the thug's ankles. I ran forward, and embedded my weapon into the back of one of the surrounding men.

The mercenary Jen faced screamed in agony and toppled backwards as she jumped to her feet. There was an ugly, furious sneer on her face as she heaved her vibroblade into the man's chest. "Pathetic weakling! You can't best me!" she hissed, and yanked her weapon out of the shuddering corpse.

"(Jen! Behind you!)" I wailed as the third man approached with a blaster. She jerked her head up to face me, and the dark, soulless look in her eyes almost made me quail.

Jen spun on her feet, vibroblade whirling into the thug's forearm, severing it neatly as he screeched. Her elbow flew up to crash into his jugular, and the man gurgled sickeningly as he crumpled.

"Guess she's got her berserker rage back," Carth muttered next to me.

Canderous laughed heartily from the end of the room, and I looked around to see we were surrounded by corpses.

"I knew you couldn't keep up that act for long," the Mandalorian said in a gratifying tone. Jen whirled around to face us, and her expression shattered. Her wounded leg buckled under her and she fell to a forlorn heap on the floor.

"(Jen!)" I rushed next to her, lifting her head up off the ground. She was shivering, shaking, and the petrified look on her face cut me to the bone. _She looks like she has seen her own death. She has the same expression as one who has lost their soul. _"(Bastila! Heal her!)"

I looked up angrily towards the Jedi, and a further surprise awaited me. Bastila was standing nearby, frozen in stark horror as she stared at Jen.

"I am Jen Sahara," Jen mumbled quietly in my arms. "I am!"

"(Yes,)" I confirmed quietly.

"We don't have time for this, princess." Canderous growled, and gave the Jedi a push. "Just bloody heal the girl, would you?"

I saw Bastila gulp as she came closer. _What is she so frightened of? What is wrong with Jen? _As the Jedi harnessed her Force powers and colour began to appear in Jen's cheeks, I wondered whether Jen's problems had anything to do with the Jedi.

_No matter what, I will not let anybody harm her. _

xXx

**_--Malak Devari--_**

"The fleet is in position, Lord Malak. We await your command," the visage of Admiral Karath spoke respectfully to me through the ships hologram, and a sense of ready satisfaction filled me. _All my plans, falling neatly into place._

"Hold your position, Admiral," I commanded, and turned to face the captain at my side. "Put me through to Admiral Rylun." _Let's see how my other attack is shaping up._

"At once, my lord." The underling jumped to obey, and flicked to another communication channel. _All these men, loyal to the point of death._

Another figure flickered on the communication stand. I appraised the Admiral with my arms folded.

"State your location, Admiral."

Admiral Rylun bowed. "We have just exited hyperspace outside the Ariliun asteroid belt, Lord Malak. Seven hours until we reach the Dantooine system."

I nodded in grim satisfaction. "Hit quick and fast, Rylun. The primary target must be eliminated... you do not wish to survive a failure."

Rylun was too much of a professional to show fear, but a minor tightening around his eyes indicated he was not as calm as his façade showed. I doubted he would survive this attack anyway, but provided he eliminated the Rakata legacy I did not care. _There's a reason why Rylun is in charge of the fleet attacking Dantooine, and Karath is overseeing the assault here on Taris. _Admiral Karath was my most strategically gifted officer; I would not risk him lightly.

"We will decimate the ruins, my Lord."

"Good. The secondary target is also vital, depending upon the Enclave's defenses. Now is a good time to weaken those moronic fools, Rylun, but if you give them time to strengthen the planetary protections then our ships will never hit."

"I will not fail you, my Lord." He bowed again.

"See that you don't." I waved my hand for the transmission to end, and turned to face my captain again.

"Put Karath back on," I demanded coldly.

Saul Karath's form filled out the hologram once again. "Yes, Lord Malak?"

"Begin the attack on Taris. Destroy the capital city. Do not leave any survivors."

"At once, my Lord."

I nodded in satisfaction, and strode away from the command centre. _Everything is going according to plan. _Bastila would soon be dead, and with the first star map destroyed, no one else would ever find out the location of the other four. _Revan never gave me credit for intelligence... but she was stupid enough to leave clues pointing to the star forge lying about for the Jedi. _My little Jedi spy upon the Endar Spire had been close enough to Bastila to find out their true mission. If Bastila and her companions had found the original Star Map, others would too. These two consecutive attacks should wipe out all knowledge.

_What a shame I could not have captured Bastila alive. Her battle meditation would have made her an excellent slave. _Or perhaps even apprentice; depending upon her strength of character. _Her old friend who betrayed her mission to me is certainly an asset. _If it were not for Bandon, I might have taken Kylah as my apprentice. _They are both ruthless enough. Unlike my old, dead master._

A cold superiority filled me as I thought back on the girl I had once cared for, in a different lifetime. _You were never strong enough to take the final step to the Dark Side, my former love. _I had known that to show I was truly worthy of being the Sith Lord, I had to prove I could destroy the very thing I held most dear. _You could never bring yourself to do that. You were weak._

My hand brushed the stark metal over my face as I recalled how close she had come. I let the cold anger flow through me, and reveled in the Force residue it shook up. _Any true Dark Lord would have killed me then. You suspected I had tried to betray you once. You must have known I would do it again. _

In the end, I had shown I was the real master.

_Galactic domination may have been your dream, Revan. _I would have smiled, if I could. _But it is **my** destiny._

xXx

_**--Mission Vao--** _

We sprinted down the hallways madly as the wailing alarm sounded in all directions. _Geez, I don't know how we're gonna get out of this one! _I could still see the sad, broken corpses we'd left behind in that big room, their sightless eyes staring up at me, accusing. _This is nuts. I can't believe we killed so many people! _For all that I wanted to leave Taris, I was starting to get cold feet. I liked Jen, but she wasn't really in charge anymore. And Canderous did scare me, a little. _Too late to turn back now, though._

Canderous grunted up ahead as we ran into another room, already populated with two more of Davik's mercenaries. He opened fire, and Carth followed suit as Big Z charged in. Bastila, however, was standing further back, still with that odd shaken look on her face. _Sheesh, first Jen goes all weird on me, and now the Jedi snot is acting crazy. _Bastila was so stuck up, and now seemed positively freaked around Jen, which was just odd. _How can you be scared of someone who cowers if you so much as look at them? _When this was all over, I needed to talk to Jen. I didn't know what had happened to her, but it seemed serious and I was going to find out.

The room suddenly shook sideways, and I yelped as I lost my balance. The sound of a thundering explosion in the distance filled the room.

"What the-" Carth muttered. Canderous finished off the final thug, and turned around. The walls rattled and the very ground beneath me seemed jerk from side to side.

"Earthquake?" I yelped out in confusion. I heard the sounds of another blast, followed by the ominous thuds and creaking of the building collapsing. The piercing alarm was still ringing.

"I don't think 'quakes usually blow things up!" Carth yelled in response.

Bastila had closed her eyes, touching her forehead with two fingers as she frowned. _Is she doing some sort of Force thing again? _If she was, she probably wouldn't tell us. _Snobby tart. _She had really ticked me off earlier, and I vowed to spend some time thinking just how I could repay her.

"The Sith," Bastila whispered at us. "I can sense it. They're bombing the planet!"

"Just to make things really challenging!" Canderous bellowed, following it with a hoarse laugh. _He's insane, he doesn't even sound scared! _"We're running out of time – we need to split up."

"Split up?" Bastila protested. "Are you mad? We should all be heading for that ship of yours!"

"We need to disable the mechanical lock on the landing gear, princess," Canderous drawled. "Unless you want the Ebon Hawk to rip itself apart when we take off."

The walls vibrated again with another explosion. "C'mon guys, no time for arguments!" I yelled. "How do we disable this thing, then?"

"There's a system mainframe near here that controls the ships security," Canderous informed me. "Someone's gonna have to sneak in there with the droid to hack into the system, while the rest of us go kill anyone stupid enough to be guarding the Ebon Hawk."

"Sounds like a job for me!" I offered. "Big Z, give us some backup?"

Zaalbar looked at me, then back at Jen. _Hah, he doesn't know who to protect._

"Good idea, kid." Canderous nodded at me.

"I ain't a kid!" I snapped.

He frowned, rolled his eyes, and pointed at me. "You, Carpet and droid head through the north doors. The security room is down the left hallway, the room at the end. No idea what the system is. Hurry!"

I beckoned Teethree forward, and disappeared out the door as the others vanished. Zaalbar howled complainingly behind me; he was obviously upset at leaving Jen.

"I know, I'm worried about her too," I muttered at him as I dashed down the hallway.

"(Mission, let me go in first!)" Zaalbar yelled and overtook me, his blade held threateningly as he bashed open the door with a kick. _Wookiees. No subtlety._

The room was empty, and a further door opened into the computer mainframe itself. _Cool. _I ran towards the central console, and tapped into it.

"Teethree, get your gears over here and slice in." I motioned the droid over, and jumped to another console to do the same. "Start looking for the Ebon Hawk's security system. I'm gonna do something else quickly."

Within minutes, I had that irritating alarm switched off, and the security cameras showing on the screen. "Hey Big Z, can you keep an eye on this console while we hack? It should show you if anyone's approaching this room."

I looked back at what Teethree was doing. "What is it, Teethree? Some sort of code?"

He beeped negatively at me. I didn't fully understand Droid Speak, but enough to get the general gist. "Can't find a code? Look for some sort of scan – maybe Davik uses retinal or facial recognition we can break."

Teethree whistled, and started chewing through the system. I watched in amazement as screens of code of data flashed by. _And I thought I was good. _

After a long minute, Teethree beeped disappointingly.

"Drat. What else could it be? Can you find anything about the Ebon Hawk's security system in there? Maybe a fingerprint or something?"

"(Mission, some people are in the corridor!)" Zaalbar cut in. I glanced quickly at the other screen. _Bantha crap! That's Davik Kang and Calo Nord! _

"Hide, guys!" I quickly flicked my stealth belt on, and looked around the room in panic. _How does a seven foot tall hairball hide in here? _My eyes caught on a tall equipment closet. "Big Z, go jump in that cupboard! Teethree, get under this desk with me." I crawled quickly into the dusty shadows underneath the table. Teethree wheeled in to join me just as the door slid open.

"Damn those Sith - they're bombing the whole city!" Davik was cursing loudly as he ran over to the console. "After the credits we've thrown at them, you'd think they'd give us advance warning!"

"Never trust the Sith, Davik," Calo said in a low tone. I shivered. _Please don't let them see us. _Calo Nord was one scary guy. He was almost as scary as Canderous. "Davik, we don't have the launch codes. You really think we can get past the Sith's automated defense guns?"

"No idea – but we can at least fly to another part of the planet! Just let me unlock the Ebon Hawk, then we're getting outta here." Davik walked up to the main console, and started tapping in some keys. He was wearing some sort of hideous purple ceremonial armour that offended my fashion sense. _Sheesh, someone really needs to tell him how to dress._

I noticed with interest that Davik pulled some sort of shiny object out of his pocket, and inserted it into a tiny slot on the side of the computer I had missed. _What's that? Hang on... is that a key? _No, surely he wouldn't use something so archaic? _Instead of a code or physical scan, he's using a keylock? _Perhaps it was the better security; I hadn't even noticed the lock.

The room shook and groaned in protest as another explosion sounded in the distance. Davik cursed, and tapped a few more keys on the computer.

"Hey Davik," Calo said slowly as he walked around the consoles. "What are the security cameras doing up on the screen?" A sliver of terror crept down my spine, and I held my breath.

Davik frowned, and looked over. "No idea. Probably some betraying scum trying to get to my ship. No time to worry about it, Calo, no one else has the key. The Ebon Hawk's ready for us. Let's go!"

The two men all but ran out of the room. I waited for about five seconds, and then crawled out and opened the closet door for Zaalbar.

"Looks like they did the job for us, Big Z." I looked up at my friend, and grabbed his arm. "C'mon, we'd better get back to the others."

_And hope they get to the ship before Davik._

xXx

**_--Davik Kang--_**

I ran down the hallway as my beautiful estate crumbled around me, cursing the blasted Sith with each step I took. Calo sprinted beside me, a trusted merc for the time being. _We work well together, but sooner or later he'll outlive his usefulness. _Calo was about as dangerous as Canderous, and I was already cursing the problems the Mandalorian had created for me. _Independent bastard. Doesn't know his place._

We turned sharply into the hangar, and the first thing I noticed was a twisted, gaping hole where my hangar doors should have stood. Smoking metal rubble was all that remained, and I could see the burning buildings of Upper Taris in the distance. _Damn those Sith! _Fortunately the Ebon Hawk, my precious baby, was relatively unscathed.

It was then that I noticed a group of stragglers in front of the ship's entrance.

"Well, look what we got here! Thieves in the hangar," I drawled confidently, and then recognized Canderous with a start. I could feel my lips curling over my teeth. _Never trust a Mandalorian. Betraying barbarians, the lot of them. _"So, you figured you'd just steal my ship for your get-away and leave me high and dry while the Sith turn the planet into dust?"

Calo stiffened to attention next to me as Canderous laughed. "Yeah, pretty much Davik. I kinda thought the Ebon Hawk could be counted as the wages you owe me."

"I'll take care of them, Davik," Calo growled next to me. "I've been looking forward to this for a long time!"

"You may be the newest kath hound in the pack, but you ain't top dog yet!" Canderous jeered at Calo, and lifted that massive piece of machinery he always lugged around with him.

My eyes flicked quickly over the remaining crowd; a soldier by the looks, and two girls holding vibroblades. I narrowed my eyes as I focused on one of them. _Ahhh, sithspawn. That's the Jedi prisoner Brejik had captured! _We were outnumbered, and they had the Force on their side.

"Perhaps now isn't the time to fight," I intervened quickly before Canderous could start shooting. "We both want to leave Taris, so why don't we work together?" If Canderous was this far, then he'd infiltrated my estate before the Sith started bombing. Which meant... _the bastard got the launch codes! And then betrayed me! _But now really wasn't the time to get revenge.

Canderous laughed mockingly at my offer. "You think I'd trust you again, Davik? Here's one lesson you shoulda' learnt long ago – never fuck with a Mandalorian."

He opened fire.

xXx

**_--Jen Sahara--_**

Fear and rage pummelled and pulsed through my head; it was taking all my possible strength to stop from screaming as a nightmare unfolded all around. _Death! Death everywhere! Who am I? _I stared in shock at the two men talking to Canderous. _I am Jen Sahara! _I needed Bastila's support and strength, but she'd been shooting me worried, frightened looks ever since the earlier battle. _How did I do that? What's wrong with my mind? _I really, really wanted to see the doctor again, but it was just beginning to occur to me that I probably never would.

Canderous opened fire on the two men facing him, and the one called Calo chucked a handful of grenades. I heard Carth yelp in pain. I clutched my vibroblade with trembling hands, eyeing up the fight ahead in shock. I could feel this foreign anger bubbling up underneath me. _No! That's not my feelings! That's just wrong! _Part of me had enjoyed killing those earlier men, and the acrid taste of smug satisfaction still sat like poison in my mouth.

My vision turned blurry; green smoke filled the room from some sort of gas grenade. I coughed, and covered my mouth with a hand. I heard the sounds of more grenades exploding, and the smokescreen thickened ominously.

Canderous grunted up ahead, and cursed Davik loudly. A figure swam into view in front of me, and I felt my eyes widen in horror as I recognized the bounty hunter, Calo Nord.

He grinned hideously at me, and quickly threw some sort of dagger towards my chest.

Against my volition, the alien fury took control of my limbs once more, and saved my life as I dodged sharply to the side. I felt my features contort and curl, and a dark laugh erupted from my lungs. _This pathetic worm will die._

"Imbecile!" the sneer bubbled up from my throat. _No! No! I am Jen Sahara! _The empowering, evil sense of might vanished from my limbs, and I stumbled in mid leap.

Calo was blinking at me in puzzlement. "Who in the Outer Rims are you? I know you!"

I gulped, and jumped backwards. I'd never seen him before. _Had I?_

Firm resolve lowered onto the bounty hunter's face. "Never mind. It's your end, girl!" He pulled out a blaster, but just at that moment Bastila jumped out of the smoke in front of me, vibro-staff raised. Calo was sufficiently surprised to give Bastila enough time to slice into his shoulder. He screamed, stumbled backwards, and pulled out a blaster.

Bastila whirled her blade furiously, and Calo's shots reflected off the staff and into the surroundings. _Wow! _Calo cursed as the Jedi jumped forward to finish it.

"You'll not kill me, Jedi!" Calo spat, and activated another gas grenade at his feet. I could just make out him turning and disappearing into the thickening smoke as Bastila lunged forward a little too late.

"Davik's dead!" Canderous hollered from somewhere in the room. "Quick! Into the Hawk!"

Bastila grabbed my arm, and yanked me towards the ship. _No one touches me! _The same dark voice raged inside my head. _Help!_

I stumbled after Bastila into the ship's entrance, and the metallic walls loomed up against me cloyingly. _Who am I? Who am I really? _The entire ship shuddered as another explosion rocked the surroundings. Bastila grabbed something out of her pocket, and pulled me towards her. I felt a sharp prick in my upper arm.

"Don't worry, you'll be safe soon. I promise," Bastila whispered into my ear. My limbs melted, and my vision dimmed. _Oh, what now? _A tired, sarcastic voice whispered. _The bitch sedated me! _Someone sneered. _No, she's a Jedi! She wouldn't do that!_

_I'm just... so tired._

xXx

**_--Carth Onasi--_**

My leg throbbed in agony, and I cursed as I stumbled through the gas fog, coughing and breathing thickly as I struggled not to succumb to the poisonous smoke. _This day just keeps getting better. _I'd heard Canderous crow over Davik's death from somewhere in the room, and it was time to board the ship. My hand whacked sharply against the metal frame, followed by my head. _Ouch. _Dizziness threatened.

_Dammit. _I gritted my teeth, and saw the ship's entrance as the gaseous fog lifted somewhat. I stumbled closer. _Time to go fly this rust bucket. I only hope Mission managed to disable the security locks. _I didn't have time to check myself; I just rushed inside.

Bastila was standing over a crumpled Jen, a resolved look on her face. _Jen's fallen again. _I didn't know what to make of her anymore. I didn't really want to try. _Ever since we landed on Taris, my damn head has been screwed on backwards._

Bastila looked up at me sharply, a flash of fright dancing in her eyes.

"S-she fainted!" Bastila exclaimed quickly.

I narrowed my eyes. _Well, she's done that before, in Upper Taris. _Odd that Bastila sounded so defensive, however.

"We're back, let's go!" Mission's bright voice from behind startled me. I moved further into the dark interior of the ship to let her pass. A thundering roar of another explosion shook the ship severely. _Stop dawdling, Onasi, time to get the hell out of here!_

Canderous, Teethree and Zaalbar followed Mission in, the Wookiee howling in worry at the sight of Jen's prone form.

"Zaalbar, Jen is fine. Go take her to a bed," Bastila ordered crisply. "Canderous and Mission, get onto the turrets. We are probably going to run into trouble. Teethree, plug into the ship's controls and see if you can help."

I rolled my eyes as I started heading towards the cockpit. _That Jedi sure loves bossing people about. But she's right this time._

"Carth, start pilo- oh,"

I heard her last command as I settled into the pilot's seat, and switched on the controls. A faint humming permeated the air as the electrics dazzled into life. A few seconds later as I prepared the ship for take-off, Bastila entered the cockpit herself, breathless.

My vision caught on the destroyed hangar doors as the ship's self-diagnostic program started up. Heaps of twisted metal rubble lay before the ship, with the smoking buildings of Taris in the distance. _I hope Mission doesn't see this. Damn those murdering bastards!_  
The ready status blinked at me on the console, and I fired up the engines. The turbine compressor started with a high-pitched whirring, building up pressure for the fusion engines to kick into life. Bastila strapped herself in next to me as I flicked on the internal communicator.

"Brace yourselves, guys. This will be a rough take-off," I said calmly as the engines roared powerfully underneath my feet. As the ship lifted, I struggled to avoid the smoking debris where the hangar doors used to be, and we shot out of the burning estate. _Lift off._

The fiery ruins of Taris disappeared beneath the cockpit window as the Ebon Hawk flew above the buildings. Clouds of smoke occasionally passed by as we disappeared higher up. Plasma fire from the heavens shot down on either side of the ship, and I struggled to weave and dodge the Sith's bombardment. I hurriedly transmitted the launch codes on all external frequencies as the Ebon Hawk thrusted away from Taris.

"Plug in the hyperspace co-ordinates for Alderaan," I told Bastila through gritted teeth, as I steered the ship. "We need to reach hyperspace as soon as we're out of the gravity well."

"We will head to Dantooine," Bastila informed me as she leaned towards the navigation console.

"What?" I snapped, as a further barrage of Sith fire surrounded the Ebon Hawk. I twisted the ship sharply to the side, and heard Bastila gasp in protest at the jolt.

"There's a Jedi enclave there where we can find refuge!" Bastila retorted as she started tapping in our destination.

"I thought you said – oh, nevermind." I cursed briefly as I felt the ship shudder. _That was a hit. Dammit._ I accelerated to maximum, and left the planet behind. The ominous sight of Sith fighters came into view as we reached space.

"Incoming fighters!" I yelled over the comm.. "Canderous, Mission, look sharp! We need a few minutes before we can reach hyperspace!"

xXx

**_--Canderous Ordo--_**

"Got ya!" I yelled in victory, as I twisted the gun controls around to find another easy target. "These Sith fighters are too puny!"

Mission was seated in the turret control next to mine, but so far had failed to shoot down a single enemy ship.

"Hey kid, would you start firing already?" I grunted at her. _The fighters may be easy to destroy, but there's too damn many of them!_

"Look, I ain't never used one of these before!" she snapped back. "And I'm not a kid!"

"Just aim and shoot – it's bloody child's play," I retorted derisively as another ship came into view. I let loose on the turrets, and fire danced from the enemy fighter.

"I'm trying, okay?" she screamed back. "Look, my home is getting bombed! Cut me some slack!"

I groaned. _Stupid kids and their fragile emotions. _"No time for snivelling, girl!" I rapped back. "The best way to honour your loved ones is to kill their enemies! So shoot some bloody Sith!"

An answering fire from Mission's guns sounded through the turret room, and I hoped I'd finally gotten through to her. Until she sobbed.

"They're all dying down there!" she whined annoyingly, and dropped the controls.

_Curses. _I kept my aim on the targeting area, but could feel my face creasing in annoyance. "I thought you were stronger than this. Maybe you are just a kid," I growled.

"Shut up!" she shrieked. "You don't care about anyone! You don't understand!"

_She is asking for it. _I tried to remind myself that she was just a girl. _Maybe, just this once, she can get away with that sort of comment. But never again. _"If you truly care about those weaklings on Taris, then you will kill as many of their murderers as you can, girl. These Sith fighters are busy destroying your planet, and all you can do is whine and moan about it?"

I heard her breath in abruptly, and pressed my verbal attack. My fingers were getting slightly numb on the controls. "Look – we're gonna die if we don't give Republic boy the time he needs to enter hyperspace. Do me a favour and pull yourself together. Kill some of your friend's murderers while you're at it." I dragged my attention away from the kid's pathetic state, and focused purely on the incoming fighters. _I'll just have to do this myself._

A few seconds later, and I heard the barrage of Mission's guns flare up once more. _About time._

"I got one!" she yelled at me. I could hear anger claiming for dominance over her grief.

"Good. Now get another one of the bastards!" I commanded.

All at once, the ship shuddered with an explosion. I cursed, and Mission bit off a scream as we were both yanked to the side.

"I could fly this tin can better," I muttered as I straightened back into the seat.

Carth's voice flickered over the ships speakers. "No serious damage. Our external communications are down. Prepare for the hyperspace jump."

I braced myself; the dancing light of enemy fire dazzled fleetingly into bright white as the ship launched into hyperspace.

xXx

**_--Bastila Shan--_**

I breathed a sigh of relief as the ship entered hyperspace. _Finally. Finally I can relax somewhat. _My shoulders felt like knotted coils of stiffened rope.

Carth groaned in the pilot's chair, and slumped forward.

"Good work," I commended him. "That did not look easy."

He gave me a dry look. "Why, thank you," he said sarcastically. "I need some caffa."

I frowned in response at him as he stood up. I noticed then the blood on his leg. "Carth, you're injured!"

"Yes. Hanging around you and crazy girl Jen is getting more and more hazardous to my health." He sighed, and muttered under his breath, "I need a vacation."

"Let me help," I ordered, and reached out to the Force automatically. He winced and jumped backwards.

"Dammit, Bastila, you could at least ask first!" he protested, backing away.

I lifted an eyebrow at his weak objection, and he scowled angrily at me. Ever since Revan had started behaving... well, more and more like she should, Carth had been in a permanent black mood.

"I'll be right back," he muttered as he walked out of the cockpit.

I sighed, and slouched back into the chair. _Revan._ My fright was beginning to overwhelm me, but now that Dantooine was closer, I could begin to feel some relief. I wished the ship's communicators hadn't been damaged; I would have liked to give the Masters some advance warning of our arrival.

Revan's scathing words hissed earlier to Davik's thugs came back to torment me cruelly. _Pathetic weakling! You can't best me! _Exactly what she had once said to me.

My eyes closed wearily, and the taste of fear sat heavy in my dry mouth. _Darth Revan is coming back. Stronger and stronger. _I was praying the masters would allow me a reprieve from babysitting her when we reached Dantooine. _They know the rough location of the star maps on Tatooine and Manaan. Maybe I could at least sit out for the first two stages of our plan. _I knew with hellish trepidation that the bond joining me to Revan meant it was impossible for me to totally avoid the Council's mission.

_But surely they will understand that I need some time to recuperate? _From Brejik's actions, as well as simply being around Revan. _Ever since she rescued me, I find myself acting less and less like a Jedi. _Canderous' sarcastic words taunted me. "_How very Jedi-like of you, princess." _I snapped my eyes open angrily. I really detested that loathsome Mandalorian.

_But in some ways, he may be correct. I lied to Revan about Alderaan; I tripped Mission using the Force; and now I've sedated Revan. _I reminded myself that she was simply too dangerous for me alone to handle, but I could not quite swallow the excuse.

_I am scared. I have faced Darth Revan before. I do not wish to do so again. _I had been so sure of myself, so confident, when we had first captured the Dark Lord. I had pushed away the memory of how frightened I had been in that encounter, and told myself over and over that I was strong, I was confident, I was capable. _I am weak, and scared._ I wondered briefly if Revan had ever felt that way. _She always seemed so sure of herself and what she was doing. I could never fathom why someone so bright and powerful would turn to the decaying road of the Dark Side. _I had tried to understand, before she had regained consciousness as Jen Sahara. The old memory resurfaced, and I could almost see Revan's broken body strapped down into the Enclave's life support system, tubes feeding kolto and nutrients into her body.

…

_"Why do you think Revan and Malak turned to the Dark Side?" I asked softly over Revan's comatose body. I'd heard many theories, and formulated my own, but I was especially interested in Master Karon's viewpoint. After all, she had been the main Jedi Master involved in the rebuilding of Revan's mind, and also the Sith Lord's former master._

_Master Karon sighed softly at me, her turquoise eyes troubled. "I believe it was primarily due to two factors. Their forbidden love for each other led to their passions clouding their judgment. They should have been separated earlier."_

_I nodded in agreement. Passion was a pitfall towards the Dark Side, and anyone who had met either of them before their fall had known what emotive characters they were. "It is a very good lesson, is it not, Master Karon?"_

_She nodded at me. "Yes. But the consequences..." she sighed again. "Their attachment to each other was so strong, that they would both risk everything to be together. Malak rushed after Revan into the Mandalorian war, when a more rational friend would have counseled patience. The irony is thus; their passions led them to the Dark Side, which then warped everything of them, including their own love for each other. Malak believes he killed his former master." She finished talking then, and looked back at the life support system attached to Revan. I could vaguely sense Revan through our bond, and it frightened me, as loathe as I was to admit it._

_"What do you think the other reason was?" I queried curiously._

_"They were too old," Master Karon responded. "Both of them could count already sixteen years when the Order found them. Normally we would not train people at such an age, or we would do so very slowly and warily."_

_"So why the exception?" The meteoric rise of Revan and Malak through the Order was well known._

_"Their sheer power. It burned and glowed like a supernova." Master Karon looked at me steadily. "I was with the team that went to Talshion, where we first discovered them. I could sense their power from a different city. It pulsed and radiated from them. I do not believe I have ever sensed anyone as strong as Revan before, with Malak a close second."_

_I shivered. I did not want to think about what my fate could have been, had Malak not attacked Revan's flagship at the very time I faced her._

_"The personality rebuild is now complete, is it not?" I asked. I thought I already knew the answer, but I trusted Master Karon's judgment implicitly._

_"Yes. The persona of Jen Sahara has been successfully implanted, with some of the original Jen's memories repressed, of course," she told me. I winced. I had seen what the Sith had done to the scholar, before she had died of her injuries in the Enclave._

_"How have you linked Revan to the council?"_

_"A few artificial memories intertwined with Jen's history. I do believe the council will tell you more, Padawan, as they wish to speak to you later this afternoon. About your vision, amongst other things."_

_I nodded. I already knew the Masters were organizing a group of Jedi to investigate the ruins I had seen through Revan's eyes. _Is that how she amounted such power? What did she find in that ancient temple? _I mused. I hoped fervently I wouldn't be part of the investigation; the mind-link already had me far too close to Revan's soul for my comfort._

…

I opened my eyes again, and stared blankly out at empty space. _Soon the Masters will take care of Revan. She is not as stable as she once was. _Dantooine was perhaps eight hours away, and the sedation would last for that long. _Fortunately._

A wistful hope coiled within me as I realized I would see the Masters before Revan woke.

_Maybe I will not have to deal with her again._

xXx

**_--Calo Nord--_**

My damaged ship was slowly being pulled in by the Sith's trajectory beam, and I scowled angrily at the wait. It had taken enough convincing to stop those diseased bastards from blowing me into space-dust to begin with. _I've worked for Lord Malak before, and I'm sure he'll be interested to hear my news._

I had hoped to fly from Taris in Davik's baby, the Ebon Hawk. _And get rid of that annoying crime lord while I was at it. _Davik had turned on Canderous; I knew it was only a matter of time before he did the same to me. _But now he is dead, and I have survived. _I swore to myself that I'd track down that Mandalorian scum and eviscerate him.

_But first, to appease the Sith Lord. _About three years ago, I had successfully completed a job for Darth Malak. _It was his own idiot officers who botched it up. _As an attempt to destroy Darth Revan, it had failed, and Malak had been so incensed that I'd disappeared before he could take his anger out on me. _He finished off Revan later, anyway._

I only hoped the news about Bastila surviving would let me escape him unscathed this time. _The Sith attack on Taris must have been to wipe out that Jedi brat. _I'd recognized Captain Carth Onasi with her as well, another survivor from the Endar Spire. In my line of work it paid to remember faces, and the Republic's war hero was an easy one to recall.

_But that crazy girl Bastila had saved... _I frowned as I tried to recollect her features. A strange sense of familiarity had clouded me when she had glared so fiercefully and sneered. I knew her name - Jen Sahara - and that she had braved the Vulkars to rescue the Jedi herself. _What is her connection to Bastila? Why did she seem so familiar?_ I frowned in concentration as I rifled through my memories. I prided myself on my photographic memory, and it was annoying that she eluded my grasp.

_It was that look I have seen before. But where?_

A dusty recollection from the dredges of my mind resurfaced...

…

_I followed Darth Malak out of the command center, greed and unease clashing in my head. It was an impressive amount the Sith lord was offering me but..._ Getting involved in Dark Jedi politics is liable to end ones life. _I was beginning to doubt the ease with which Malak assured me this trap could be laid. If I had known the full extent of this job beforehand, I would never have agreed. Too late now, Malak was sure to kill me if I opted out. Perhaps the one thing I couldn't defend against was the Force._

_"Ahh, Malak," a deep female voice called up ahead, and Darth Malak stopped in front of me, his black cloak swirling around him._

_He bowed. "Master," he acknowledged gravelly._

Just the person I did not want to run into. _I cursed inwardly, as the Dark Lord of the Sith herself walked around her apprentice and appraised me. Her black, soulless eyes seemed to bore into my head, and rip out my soul for inspection. An unfamiliar feeling of fright froze my rampant thoughts, and I dropped my gaze._

_"And who is this?" she rapped out._

_"His name is Calo Nord, Master," Malak said smoothly. "He is a renowned bounty hunter, and I have hired him to infiltrate the smuggling ring around Exiniar."_

_The lies glided effortlessly out of Malak's mouth. I looked up to see naked fury dancing and spinning in the empty eyes of Darth Revan._

_"Without informing me?" she snapped, her voice darker and deeper than before._

_"My apologies, master." Malak bowed again. "I wanted to ask you earlier."_

_The rage faded from the horrific face of the Dark Lord, and she suddenly smirked. "Perhaps you can now, my love. Come with me." She turned, and walked away._

…

A feeling of shocked disbelief whirled inside my mind. _No, it can't be! Can it? _The eyes were different... _but the look was the same. The same hideous, twisted, fury. _I quickly recalled the structure of Jen Sahara's face, and tried to match it in my mind. _Darth Revan's skin was sickly, pale white. But the cheekbones are the same. _Identical slanting eyes, and standard forehead. Small nose, and pointed chin.

_Bastila was protecting Jen Sahara. Bastila was the one who faced Darth Revan, and somehow escaped Lord Malak's attack. _Was it possible that Bastila had also saved the life of Darth Revan herself? _The Jedi are weak fools. Is it conceivable that the Jedi somehow rescued Darth Revan, and now have her under their power?_

The similarities in her face were too close. And that same look of rage...

_Lord Malak needs to be told about this._

* * *

xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - glad you liked it :) Canderous was fun to write._

_game-freak152 - thank you, hope you keep enjoying :)_

_Brynn - Okay, fair enough :)_

_snackfiend101, Dark Lord Daishi, Red Mage Neko & Mats Forsen - Mwhaha... Jen is a bit cringe-worthy isn't she? Seriously, Rev is not far away, just give me a few chapters to focus on the others and set a few things up. But I've put a flash in this next chapter for the meantime..._

_Feza - Cheers for the vision suggestion - if I can think of something applicable I might go back and rewrite a few chapters._


	20. Refuge denied

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

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**Chapter Twenty – Refuge Denied**

_- Carth Onasi -_

* * *

I sipped my caffa slowly as I checked out the ship's sensors. Bastila was next to me in the co-pilot's chair, and hadn't spoken for the last hour. For all that her overbearing attitude ticked me off, I was becoming sick of the solitude. And my thoughts kept getting tangled over Jen. _She's still unconscious. Surely she wasn't that injured?_ Maybe her body needed a break from acting like different people. I scowled. 

"Only four hours until we reach Dantooine," I commented, hoping for a conversation to take my mind off things.

Bastila sighed softly next to me. "Yes. I, for one, am looking forward to some rest. I only wish the Ebon Hawk's communications weren't down."

"Well, it could have been worse," I said dryly. "In fact, I'm surprised it wasn't. Canderous must be an ace on those guns."

Bastila sniffed haughtily. "I am sure he has seen a lot of bloodshed."

"Yeah, I guess." I didn't much like the Mandalorian myself, but Bastila seemed to loathe him with a passion.

We lapsed into silence again, and my thoughts wandered despondently on the ruins we had left behind. My mind had been so tightly focused on flying the ship and dodging enemy fire that I hadn't allowed the destruction of Taris to affect me at the time. _Mission must be taking it pretty hard. _The poor kid - Taris was the only home she had even known.

And this was why the Sith had to be stopped. _To destroy an entire city, just to get to Bastila. _Images of the burning Tarisian dwellings rose in my mind, and then deformed into Telosian architecture. _My home. _Also destroyed by the Sith.

I gritted my teeth, and looked sharply out of the cockpit window. Thoughts of Telos were better left behind. I had paid the price for caring too much, and the aftermath had almost killed me.

"What will you do when we land on Dantooine?" Bastila interrupted my thoughts quietly. I ripped my attention away from dark memories, and focused on the Jedi.

"Get in touch with Admiral Dodonna, I guess," I replied. "I would have done that already if it were possible."

Teethree had plugged into the ship's system, and run a full diagnostic check on the damage to the Ebon Hawk. Fortunately, the only substantial damage was to the communications relay, which wasn't essential to the ship's running. While the repairs needed were not too extensive, they were beyond the abilities of either Teethree or Zaalbar - our only crewmates with any ability to fix electronic equipment. _Well, I can hotwire a speeder, but that's about it._

"You would not be willing to stay with the Jedi mission?" Bastila queried. "I am sure the Council will send another group of Jedi knights to Tatooine."

"Maybe they should do it in secret this time," I muttered. "The Endar Spire was too much of a price to pay for you Jedi to look at some silly old ruins." Too many comrades had died on that ship. And I still had no idea what the Jedi were actually after.

"You do not know what you are talking about," Bastila said icily. "The _silly old ruins_, as you put it, happen to be our only hope of defeating Malak's armies."

I sighed heavily; Admiral Dodonna had imparted the importance of the Jedi mission to me beforehand. _But it would be nice to actually be told something about it, rather than being treated like some sort of inferior grunt. _"What's so special about these ruins then, Bastila? What sort of Force power do they have?"

"I did not mention anything about the Force." Her voice was tight.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. "It's pretty obvious, Bastila. What else could stop Malak?"

She paused for a minute. "Well, yes, alright then. But frankly, I cannot say more."

I tried to shrug away my irritation. _I'm probably not going to be around her for much longer. I don't really need to know. But damn, I can't help being curious. _"So why did you Jedi need Jen then?"

Bastila made some sort of high-pitched noise in her throat; I jerked my head to catch her expression, but it was bland and unforthcoming. "She is a talented scholar, Carth. She happens to know a lot about the archeological period of these ruins."

"More than Jedi Masters? Come on, I know some of those old farts spend all their time researching the past." My tone turned slightly derogatory despite my best intentions.

"You should show more respect for the Masters, Carth. They understand more than you could ever comprehend!"

"Okay, okay!" I raised my hands in defeat. "Sorry! I- Look, I don't like being left in the dark. Not too mention that Jen doesn't seem to fit in with your whole mission, no matter how much you harp on about her education." I ended in a mumble.

Bastila coldly turned her head away, ignoring my last comment. But I'd obviously started her thinking, for she soon initiated the conversation again.

"What do you think of Jen, Carth?"

"What do you mean?" I asked suspiciously. _What is she getting at?_ "I generally try not to."

"I mean, how did she act before I joined you both on Taris?"

I frowned at Bastila. "Like a lunatic. She's absolutely crazy. I- heh, I can't imagine her locked up in some university, studying placidly."

Bastila's voice turned tentative. "Has she been very angry?"

"Angry? At what? She seems to get angry at everything." No, perhaps that wasn't quite fair. Bastila took in an unsteady breath of air. I decided to clarify. "Well, that's not entirely true. I mean, she's more reckless than anything else. Brave, too." I remembered her determination to rescue Zaalbar. "And generous." The money she threw away on that harassed merchant. "Annoying." Amazing how she could constantly hound and exasperate me. Her current meek act was the worst, however. "Really annoying." _Dammit, I'm rambling. _I sighed. "She's just crazy, Bastila. Recklessly crazy."

Bastila was staring at me with a peculiar expression on her face.

"What?" I snapped.

"Nevermind," she replied softly, her dark eyes still boring into mine questioningly.

"I'm going to check on Mission." I stood abruptly, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden. For some reason, the direction of the conversation was starting to unnerve me.

_Come to think of it, Jen's been acting pathetically shy and nervous ever since Bastila joined us. _That was why I wondered if she was doing it for Bastila's benefit. _And the Jedi certainly does thrive on being in charge. _I couldn't believe for a minute that any of Jen's meek behaviour was genuine. _And it's driving me batty._

I headed towards the central common room of the Ebon Hawk, and stopped when I saw the large form of Canderous throwing what looked suspiciously like short knives at the far wall. _What, he doesn't like the décor? _After further inspection, I noticed the Mandalorian had hooked up a half-tattered combat suit on the wall, that had obviously seen better days. Several knives stuck jaggedly out of it.

"Trying to improve your aim, Ordo?" I muttered.

Canderous turned around to appraise me, and grinned. Before I could blink, he had yanked out another knife and thrown it in my direction. I couldn't quite hide a jump of surprise as the blade thwacked into the wall beside my head. It quivered.

"Sithspit!" I growled, scowling at him angrily. "Are you trying to start a fight, Mandalorian?"

He laughed, his gravely tone raising my ire further. "If I was, you'd already be down on the floor, Republic."

I glared at him, and pulled the knife out of the wall with a grunt. It was well balanced and unadorned; a weapon rather than a decoration. I pocketed it and left the room, Canderous' mocking laughter following me down the ship's corridor.

I heard faint sobbing as I neared the starboard bunkroom, which had been promptly turned into the women's chambers. The door was slightly open, and I poked my head in cautiously. Mission was curled up in Zaalbar's arms, her face pressed tightly against the snarled fur of the Wookiee.

Zaalbar looked up as I approached, frowning at my appearance. He rumbled something gently to the Twi'lek, who lifted her head to face me.

"Hi Carth," she sniffed, rubbing at red-rimmed eyes that stood out in stark contrast to her pale blue complexion.

"Hey," I said softly as I entered the room. "Uh, you okay?" I felt for the girl, I really did, but I was useless in situations like this. I noticed briefly that Jen's unconscious form was sprawled on one of the bottom bunks.

"N-not really. I still can't believe it's gone! I mean, I grew up there and now it's... it's... it's just gone!" She dropped her face into her hands, and the old grief tore at my insides. _A whole city..._ Taris would be rebuilt, I knew, just like Telos had been. But it would never be the same.

"I don't know what to say," I said helplessly. I suddenly didn't know why I had come here. Words had never helped me, either. But I hated to see the kid go through what I had once.

"I don't really think there's anything you can say. I just have to find some way to deal with it, I guess." Her voice was muffled against Zaalbar's chest. The Wookiee was glaring at me; I wondered whether my words were just upsetting the Twi'lek more. She muffled another sob against Zaalbar. "I don't know how people can move on from something like this."

"You- you do," I responded hesitantly. "But it takes a long time. And part of it always stays with you."

"How would you know?" she snapped angrily, her mood swinging abruptly as she twisted to glare at me. Zaalbar growled, less impressed with my presence than ever. I sighed in the face of her anger. _Why did I say that? I don't want to talk about the past. All it does is rip open scabbed-over wounds._

"My home world was destroyed by the Sith," I said flatly. _Don't ask anymore. Please._

Mission's face had turned even paler, if that was possible. Her mouth shaped into a circle; her eyes widened as she stared at me in shocked surprise. "Oh! I-I'm sorry. I guess you do understand then, don't you?"

The sudden sympathy that washed through the Twi'lek's face humbled me. _I don't need pity. But... that she would feel sorry for me this close after Taris was bombed...? _I realized then that Mission had a very big heart. "Well, uh, I'll leave you be," I mumbled, and backed out of the door before her sympathy made me any more uneasy. My eyes caught on Jen's sleeping figure, and Mission followed my gaze.

"She's been out like a drunk since we boarded the Ebon Hawk," Mission said softly, but I heard an undercurrent of some other emotion thread through her tone. "Bastila says she fainted from exhaustion. It's been hours now!"

Zaalbar rumbled something in his language, and Mission turned her tear-streaked face to nod at him in agreement. "Neither do I, Big Z."

"Well, I guess if Bastila thinks she's okay-" I began.

"I think Bastila's hiding something. Jen's been weird ever the Jedi joined us," Mission muttered.

I frowned, and stared at the girl. I'd made the connection as well, but I doubted it was Bastila's fault. I didn't trust the Jedi, but I trusted the wild, reckless Jen even less. "Bastila's a Jedi, Mission. This meek act of Jen that's driving us all crazy must be some game Jen's playing with Bastila."

Mission scowled at me and shook her head, headtails flying in irritation. "No way. I know Jen, Carth. She hasn't been herself. And Bastila has something to do with it."

"You've only known her for about a week, Mission," I answered, in what I hoped was a reasonable tone.

"Sometimes that's all you need! Geez, Carth, where's your loyalty? Jen saved your life!"

_Don't start an argument Onasi, _I warned myself as I stared back at the irate teenager. "Just because you owe someone a debt doesn't mean you should ignore their faults." I struggled to keep my tone neutral. For some reason, the subject of Jen always stirred up my emotions. "There is nothing worse than blind trust, Mission."

"Blin- how dare you, you overgrown nerf-herder!" she spat. Zaalbar growled loudly at me. _Nice one, Onasi. Let's upset the Twi'lek whose home has just been destroyed. _"Jen's been nothing but good to us all – saved both your life and Big Z's! And now she's having some sort of problem – and it's got to do with that snooty, sneaky Jedi – and you want to just walk away? What sort of friend are you?"

I backed out of the door before my own anger boiled over. Zaalbar looked like he was ready to jump to his feet. Obviously Jen had snagged both their trust, well and truly. "I see I'm upsetting you, Mission. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that. I- I'll talk to you later."

I exited through the door, and Mission yelled out another curse to my back. I could hear the Wookiee rumble something to her as I walked quickly through the ship's corridor. _Damn. I've just made things worse. _But the girl shouldn't be so quick to swear loyalty to someone as unpredictable and downright crazy as Jen. _What if it isn't an act? What if Bastila really has done something to Jen? _No... I didn't trust the Jedi and their motives, but that was going too far. Bastila had her own issues, I knew, but she was still a Jedi.

When I'd first met Jen onboard the Endar Spire, she'd come across as nervous and introverted as she was acting right now. On Taris she'd alternated between psychopathic rage and impish mischievousness. But I preferred that to her current personality.

_Bastila has been totally protective of her, as well. _Which further enforced the theory that it was all a conscious act; for some reason Jen wanted Bastila's loyalty. _Mission's setting herself up for a betrayal._

I scowled angrily at myself, and headed back to the cockpit, resolving to put all thoughts of Jen firmly from my mind.

xXx

"Exiting hyperspace," I broadcast over the ship's internal comm. as I flicked a few switches. I noticed a definite relaxing of Bastila's shoulders next to me. _I guess I know how she feels. It will be nice to not be running from rakghouls, Vulkars and Sith for awhile. _I pulled back on the hyperspace lever, and the world slowed down for a moment.

Then the sensors went berserk. Flashing lights jabbed my vision both from the console and the cockpit window as blaster fire shot passed it. Warning proximity alarms triggered blaringly.

"Holy-" I cut myself off to jerk the steering abruptly to the left; narrowly avoiding a small fighter craft that had appeared in front of me. Bastila gasped from the sudden movement; and I thought I heard Mission yell in protest from the bunkrooms.

"Get on the turrets!" I yelled through the comm. as I twisted the Ebon Hawk sharply to the right. A squadron of fighters swam into view. "Stang! It's Sith fighters!"

"No!" Bastila half screamed, half gasped.

I kept the steering tight, turning the Ebon Hawk fully around so the mass of Dantooine could be seen in the distance. A sobering sight met my eyes. _Half a dozen Sith destroyers. Near Dantooine? _Not to mention far too many fighters.

"The Force," Bastila muttered numbly. "I can feel the Masters using the Force."

"Bastila, enter a new destination. We have to get out of here!"

I vaguely heard the sound of turret fire start up. _Canderous and Mission must have reached the guns. _It might buy us some time, but we had to get out of there. _We're sitting ducks._

"No! I must help – my battle meditation can aid the Council," Bastila was muttering incoherently; I twisted my head sharply to see that she was pale, shaking.

"There is no way we can survive out here!" I yelled back at her in disbelief. "A hyperspace jump is our only option!"

"They are bombing the Enclave, Carth! I cannot- I will not run!" A deep quavering gasp racked her frame. "I do not know where else to turn! I **must** see the Masters!"

The Ebon Hawk shuddered. _A hit, dammit. How much more damage can we take? _"Are you trying to kill us all, Bastila?" I snarled, and dropped the controls to lean over to the co-piloting navigation console. _Damned if I'm going to sit back and die._

Bastila made some sort of indignant noise as I pushed her aside, but my mind was on the computer. The Ebon Hawk had five pre-programmed hyperspace co-ordinates inputted already, and all of them were common smuggling destinations. The third one was Tatooine. _How ironic. The Endar Spire's original destination. _

I selected the desert planet, and the computer started calculating the route from our current location. I hurriedly grabbed back the controls, and then noticed the squadron of hostile fighters directly in front of the Ebon Hawk, all firing. _Nothing for it._

"Hold on!" I yelled over the comm. as I yanked on the hyperspace controls.

"No! Carth – we're going to hit them!" Bastila screamed as the ship jumped forward. The enemy ships ahead seemed to stretch as they swarmed closer and our craft surged ahead. I tensed my shoulders as one fighter came closer and closer, and I swore I could almost see the elongated helmet of the pilot.

I pulled back tightly on the steering column, and the ship lurched upwards as it jumped fully into hyperspace. Bastila's shrieks rang through my ears as the enemy craft shot underneath the Ebon Hawk.

Our view suddenly snapped into the serene blackness of hyperspace.

* * *

xXx

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_**Author's Note: **_

_Certain members of the Jedi Council will be appearing later in the story. As will Juhani._

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Dark Lord Daishi - I like Calo, I don't know why... and I wanted a specific reason for why Malak finds out about Revan (I don't think that get's properly explained in the game, does it?)_

_Xenzen - thanks for the suggestion. I'll put tags in any multi-POV chapters I do (have updated the last chapter with them). Love your story... haven't finished reading it yet so haven't reviewed!_

_Firera - sorry for the delay!_

_snackfiend101 - hate to disappoint my most loyal reviewer - but you will get to see their reactions at some stage later!_

_Data - Yeah I portrayed Malak very negatively because he was busy blowing stuff up. I know what you mean about blowing planets up - actually I prefer to think of it as bombing cities, always seemed a bit far-fetched to be able to destroy an entire planet! Certainly haven't ruled out redemption (haven't planned exactly how I'm going to end it yet...too far away!)_

_Waffles, game-freak152 & Lilina - thanks! I really enjoyed writing that last chapter, the downside being that I find it hard to write consecutive chapters quite as interesting! Anyway, sorry for the delay._

_Brynn - Zaalbar chapter not far away, and he certainly suspects something._

_Red Mage Neko - The something will change as soon as I can make it happen :)_


	21. Tatooine

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

****

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**Chapter Twenty-one – Tatooine**

_- Bastila Shan -_

* * *

Ice was curdling in my veins as I sat in stark horror. The Ebon Hawk was now flying meekly through hyperspace, and Carth was muttering over the consoles. All I could think of was Dantooine.

And Revan.

_Who is still alive? What do I do now? _I'd only once felt as helpless as I did right now, and that was back on Taris. Collared and sedated.

_Dantooine, under attack? _I could barely believe what I had seen. _Why? Why does this have to happen to me? _My resolve and confidence were faltering; cracking. _Master Vrook? Vandar? Nemo? _I thought of all the Jedi I knew back in the Enclave, and a dark, sickly grief surged through me.

_Despair is one of many roads to the dark side, child. _Nemo had said that to me, once. _You must have faith in the Force._

I could not succumb; now, more than ever, I needed to be strong. Logically I knew that the Jedi Masters would survive the attack on Dantooine, and probably triumph. _I felt at least a dozen Masters using the Force back there. If I could have helped..._ despite common sense telling me that Carth had been correct in his course of action, I could not stop the bitter anger at his quick jump into hyperspace. _I feel like we betrayed the Enclave in their darkest hour._

Obviously Malak split his fleet to attack both Dantooine and Taris jointly. But why? _It is not a clever move. Surely this will turn even the Outer Rim worlds against him. _Malak was not the tactician Revan had once been, but he had never struck me as a floundering idiot either. _Therefore he must have realized he would probably not succeed with an outright assault on the Enclave. The Force is too strong there. _Had he been after a specific target?

My blood ran cold as a fleeting thought occurred to me. _What if our mission really had been betrayed? What if he knows we have learnt about the Star Maps, and his target was the ancient ruins? _That made horrible sense. But there was no way he could have found out about it. Only the Jedi onboard the Endar Spire knew about the discovery of the Star Forge. _Could a Jedi have turned to the dark side, without any of us realizing?_

_What is done, is done. You can only make the best of what happens next. _Funny how my father's words still came back to counsel me, even though I had last seen him at the tender age of seven. _I remember him having the wisdom of a Jedi._

"Where are we headed?" I asked Carth shortly. _Time to stop wallowing in grief and self-pity, and find a way forward._

"Tatooine." His reply, terse.

I blinked. _Tatooine? Isn't that a bit of a ... coincidence? _Headed towards the original destination of the Endar Spire. _There are no coincidences. There is only the Force._

"How long do you expect the hyperspace jump to last?"

Carth glanced at the central console. "Two days. Hopefully we can repair the Ebon Hawk when we land."

I licked suddenly dry lips. "If we will be on Tatooine, then perhaps the mission is not totally over." _Perhaps I am meant to carry on?_

Carth had turned sharply to face me at my words, a frown darkening his face. "You want to complete a mission the Council had originally sent a dozen Jedi Knights to accomplish?"

"We were a large group primarily for defensive reasons, Carth," I told him absently. _In case Revan returned. Although only me, Galdea and Seris knew about her. _I hadn't even told Kylah the truth about Jen Sahara, despite our long acquaintance.

The reminder that I was alone, with Darth Revan sedated in a nearby room, slammed the crawling fear back into my body. Her sedation would wear off in a few hours, and then she would wake.

No, I must think rationally about this. _How can one be rational about the Dark Lord of the Sith, Revan herself? _I forcefully swallowed my fear, and reviewed the last day. The only times Revan had escaped her persona of Jen Sahara was when her life was threatened. Hence, I would have to make sure she did not become endangered. _Perhaps I should persuade Revan to stay on the Ebon Hawk until I can get in contact with the Council?_

At least she had not tried to use the Force. _Even if she does, I can still cut her off. _Revan's attempts to access the Force back on Taris had been clumsy, like someone fumbling for the light switch in the dark. Our mindlink gave me sufficient leverage to make sure she never found that switch. _Her unbalanced emotional state is to my advantage. And ever since Jen has become her dominant personality, she has not even been aware of the Force. _

I had a funny feeling that if Revan embraced the Force again, the persona of Jen Sahara would vanish like a child's ice cone under a desert sun.

_But for now, since we are headed towards Tatooine, I must attempt to reach the Star Map. _I still had the bond with which to keep an eye on Revan; as long as she did not stray from the safe confines of the Ebon Hawk, I could breathe a little easier.

I forced my thoughts away from the disturbing existence of Revan, and concentrated on what I had known of our original mission. _The star map on Tatooine lies in the Eastern Dune Sea. The one on Manaan lies on the bottom of the ocean. _Unfortunately, the Masters had no clue about the location of the ones on Korriban or Kashyyyk. _What comes, will come. I **will** be strong, and the Force will be with me._

I had to believe myself, or I was lost.

"And you don't think you need this defense after Taris? After Dantooine?" Carth's voice, skeptical and disbelieving, reminded me I was involved in a conversation.

"It will only take one Jedi to find what the council needs on Tatooine." I stared steadily at Carth, knowing that a mask of confidence was hiding my innermost fears. "I was your commander back on the Endar Spire. Will you follow me on Tatooine? Will you help with the war against Malak?"

Carth suddenly banged a fist down on the controls. "How can you even ask that, Bastila? Of course I'll help! But I'd like to know a little more, first!" He was scowling angrily. "Not too mention that I think we should wait until we've talked to Republic HQ and the Jedi Council before forging our own way forward!"

"Of course, Carth," I replied calmly. Irritation was flashing through his eyes, but my control had returned. "But while we are waiting for the Ebon Hawk to be repaired, we may as well investigate any leads."

"I- I suppose that's fair enough. What is it you're after, anyway?" He still sounded annoyed. I sighed in exasperation. _I thought he was military. Used to taking orders, and not questioning his superiors. _

"It is a Force relic, as you deduced earlier." I said no more, and although he was still scowling, he let the matter drop.

My thoughts had been whirling through black fear and blind panic, despite my attempts to stay in control. I needed some time alone to strengthen my resolve.

"I will leave you for awhile, Carth," I told him steadily, and left the cockpit.

xXx

I was feeling relaxed and at peace when a presence slowly roused in the far reaches of my mind. _Revan. She is waking._ I breathed in deeply, and stood from my place on the floor. The room I occupied was a small office of some description; perhaps created as the personal quarters of the ship's captain. It seemed a good place for some privacy.

My determination was clear as I stretched, and left the room. _I must ensure Revan listens to me. _I could not risk letting her rage reappear.

As I neared the bunkroom, I could hear the young Twi'lek waking Revan. I paused to listen in on the conversation.

"Uh, where – where are we?" Revan's groggy voice infiltrated through the door to reach my ears.

"On our way to Tatooine," Mission replied. "You slept through a lot! How are you feeling?"

"A bit out of it," a soft voice groaned. "Tatooine? Oh, that's right, the ruins."

"Ruins?" Mission sounded confused.

"Hang on, this isn't the Endar Spire." There was a pause. "Oh, this is the Ebon Hawk. I'm not feeling quite awake yet. Um, weren't we headed towards Aldaraan?"

All I could sense from Revan was drowsy confusion, but I held my breath nevertheless. _How will she react when she hears I lied to her? That we were actually on our way to Dantooine?_

"(We were headed towards Dantooine. Bastila believed we could find refuge there, but to no avail. We ran into a group of enemy ships, and jumped back into hyperspace. I do not know why Tatooine was chosen as our destination,)" Zaalbar told Revan in a quiet growl.

All I could sense from Revan was puzzlement. No anger. Wary relief spun through me.

"Enemy ships? I- I'm glad I slept through it. Is everyone okay?"

"Well, we're all better than you!" Mission's high-pitched voice had turned suddenly sharp. "What's been the matter with ya, Jen? You've been acting so strange!"

I realized she was about to start interrogating Revan, and decided it was time to intervene. _Provided she remains as Jen Sahara, I can handle her. I can handle this situation._

"I am glad to see you are awake, Jen," I said crisply as I entered the room. Mission whirled around to glare at me. I raised a supercilious eyebrow at the girl.

"I- yes. Uh, what happened to me?" Her question sounded sincere. I could not detect any negative emotions through the bond. _Does she truly not realize I drugged her? Can I really believe that?_

"You were exhausted, Jen. You collapsed." The words were true; the meaning was not. I overlaid my tone with the Force to drive the words home. _Better I use persuasion on her. Better that she does not think I drugged her._

"Oh. I- collapsed." She blinked at me dazedly, and I realized belatedly just how strong I had interleaved the Force in my words. Mission was looking a little disconcerted also.

"I guess I let everybody down," Jen mumbled.

"Nonsense," I replied in a matter of fact tone. "We survived admirably, thanks to Carth's piloting skills and Mission and Canderous on the turrets, of course." I turned briefly to smile at the Twi'lek, hoping to make our relationship a little warmer. She was frowning at me in annoyance; if anything, her ire had returned. _Immature child. I suppose I have to smooth the ruffled feathers of a teenager now?_

Revan was nodding slowly at me in agreement, and I felt my confidence returning. The dark fear of what could come lay deep inside me, twisted and bubbling. I ignored it.

"Jen, I would like to speak to you alone," I stated, staring pointedly at Mission. "Can you please give us some privacy?"

The Twi'lek scowled. "I was talking to Jen first!" she exclaimed in a petulant tone.

"(Mission, we can come back later,)" Zaalbar intervened, throwing me a wary glance. I hoped the Wookiee had not become suspicious of me.

Mission shot me another angry look, and then stomped sulkily out of the room. Zaalbar followed her quietly. I sighed, and then turned to face Revan. She was now sitting on the bottom bunk, staring at her twisted hands.

"I- I'm so confused," she whispered. "I feel like I don't know who I am."

The fury had gone from our bond, but her whirling puzzlement almost choked me in its intensity. As a rule, I did not like using the Force to implant suggestions, but I didn't have any choice. _She must stay on the Ebon Hawk._ _The masters will understand. And they will be able to re-establish Jen's personality. The sooner I can contact them, the better for all concerned._

I breathed in deeply, and approached the bed.

xXx

The remainder of the journey was fairly uneventful. I found it hard to rest, as I was consciously keeping check on Revan's emotions through our mind-link. She seemed to sleep a lot, and apart from that her presence felt hazy; drugged almost. Like she was walking around in a stupor. I knew Force persuasion could sometimes temporarily affect a person like that, but at this stage I pushed my concern aside. _It is for the best. _Stripped of her affinity with the Force, and attached to me via our bond, I knew Jen was a great deal more susceptible to any Force suggestions I made. I could not help but take advantage of that situation.

I felt largely relieved when Carth pulled the Ebon Hawk out of hyperspace. The tensions on the ship were beginning to disrupt my meditations almost as much as Revan's presence did. With Mission's continued sulking and Canderous' mouthy comments, I was eagerly anticipating the Tatooine landing just so I could walk outside in the fresh air. _I wonder why the Twi'lek girl is annoyed at Carth, though? _I'd noticed her scowling childishly whenever he walked into the room, which had the added side-effect of the Republic officer locking himself in the cockpit for the most part. _Children. She should not be along on this trip, particularly if she is going to behave so immaturely._

I would also be glad to free myself from the lurking shadow of the Wookiee. Zaalbar seemed determined to pin me down for answers about Revan's behaviour; I did not think my vague responses would satisfy him for long.

As Carth expertly landed the Ebon Hawk in a small settlement called Anchorhead, I headed back to the central common room to meet with the others, working out a plan of action in my head.

The best way to start would be to gather information. The deserts of Tatooine were populated with the fearsomely primitive Sand People, and I knew it would be wise to take some of the others with me. _Carth and, as loathe as I am to admit it, Canderous. Zaalbar would also be an asset, although I doubt I could convince him. _The Wookiee was difficult to separate from either Mission or Revan. The ties the Wookiee and the Twi'lek held with the former Sith Lord were worrying, to say the least. Not to mention Carth's mingled reactions to her, although I sensed his anger was more palpable than anything else.

They were all conveniently seated as I strode in. Canderous was grinning at Revan, who was looking away.

"Canderous," I approached him, struggling to keep my tone firm. "I would like you to accompany Carth and I into Anchorhead."

Canderous smirked at me. "Really, princess? Are you offering me a job?"

"If you wish to look at it that way, then yes," I responded. "I am on a mission from the Jedi Council, and your help would be appreciated." Perhaps appealing to his ego would work.

He snorted at me. "The council pay well, does it?"

_Mercenaries. _"They do," I said icily. "It is a matter you can bring up with them as soon as I can get into touch."

He laughed at my expression. "Relax, princess. You ain't gonna order me about, but I don't see any harm into getting you out of whatever trouble you're liable to put yourself in. Until I can find some real work, that is."

My ire rose at that, but I controlled it neatly. I doubted I would get a stronger commitment from that greedy, ruthless man.

The Ebon Hawk jolted softly as it landed. I turned to face Mission. "Mission, Zaalbar, I think it would be best if you were to stay onboard for the meantime." As the girl started scowling, I threw in another comment. "Jen could perhaps do with the company." I hoped that would be enough to keep her there. The last thing I needed was for that irresponsible child to get in trouble for stealing someone's credits.

The expression on her face warped into a sweet smile. "Whatever you say, Bastila." Her smile was just a little too bright to be genuine. I frowned at her.

"I am serious, Mission. It could be dangerous out there."

"Geez, I said ok! What do you want me to do, swear my life on it?" She scowled at me.

"A promise would be nice," I said tightly.

"Fine! I promise I'll stay on the Ebon Hawk!" She crossed her arms and turned her back on me just as Carth entered the room. I hoped fervently the Twi'lek would keep that vow.

"Shall we go?" Carth asked, belting on a blaster. Canderous grunted, and I nodded at them both.

"Let us see what Anchorhead has to offer," I said mildly, and led the way out of the Ebon Hawk.

* * *

xXx

* * *


	22. A brother in need

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-two – A brother in need**

_- Zaalbar -_

* * *

"I'm bored, Big Z. Ain't no way that stuck-up Jedi is telling me what to do." Mission had folded her arms, and was wearing an all too familiar stubborn look on her young face. 

"(She asked us three to stay on the Ebon Hawk, Mission,)" I reminded her. "(You promised her you would remain here.)"

"Only so she'd stop harping at me." Mission looked disgruntled. A familiar worry of her natural mischievousness curled within me.

I lowered my voice to a faint rumble. "(Mission, I do not wish to leave Jen.)"

We both turned to look at the human, who was sitting in the central room reading a databook Bastila had given her. She appeared engrossed in the story. Over the last day, Jen had assured us quietly that she was fine, that Bastila was helping her. For some reason, this did not alleviate my fears. _Jedi do know a lot. But this is not Jen. Something has happened to her, and she is acting like someone else. And it has something to do with the Force. _Why else would Bastila be involved?

"Jen, come for a wander into Anchorhead with us?" Mission appealed.

Jen looked up, and blinked at Mission. "Uh, no, we should stay here. I am happy reading."

Mission scowled. "Come on! Have you ever been to Tatooine before? Let's go have a look around!"

"I- I told Bastila I'd stay here." Her voice was uncertain, quavering.

"(Mission-)" I started saying warily, but she cut me off.

"Where's your sense of adventure?" Mission retorted. "You were the one who conned me into going to the swoop race!"

"(I don't- what!)" I growled suddenly. _Jen_ conned _Mission?_

A bewildered expression passed through the human's face. "I- I did? I did. It- it all seems a little hazy."

"What's Bastila doing to you?" Mission verbalized my fears.

"S-she is helping me!"

"Helping you turn into someone with the brains of a Gamorrean and the balls of a gizka!" Mission was almost yelling now, her lekku flicking back and forth to emphasize her point.

"No- I mean, no!"

"(We are both worried about you, Jen Sahara. You have been acting like someone else. And it has been this way since Bastila has turned up on Taris.)" I did not like accusing people, but I could not think of any other link. Normally I would not question a Jedi, but Bastila had rebuffed all my queries and worries about Jen. My concern for the human was stirring up my anger.

Jen dropped her head into her hands, shaking it and muttering. "This bond isn't real. I'm not hearing her say anything. I'm-"

"(Jen?)" I took a step forward, and she jerked her head up. A maelstrom of emotions battled in her green eyes, before she dropped them suddenly.

"It'll be fun," Mission wheedled softly. "Bastila doesn't need to know."

A flash of impish adventure crossed Jen's face, and I almost shouted in relief. _To think I would be glad to see that reckless look again!_

"Alright. Let's go," she answered softly.

"Awesome!" Mission hopped with delight, and whirled around, running into the crew quarters to grab her belongings. Jen appeared uncertain again, biting her lip.

"(You cannot back out now,)" I warned her softly. I almost wanted Mission to drag Jen into trouble. Anything to shake her out of this foreign identity that seemed to be gripping her.

She nodded, and looked away. After a small wait I was starting to get suspicious of Mission's activities. Just as I was about to find her, she sprinted back into the room, and threw us both a vibroblade. Jen caught hers hesitantly. Mission had an evil grin on her face.

"(What did you do?)" I asked Mission warily.

She beamed at me brightly. "Gave Teethree a couple of orders, that's all."

"(Orders? What orders?)"

"Just in case the others try to buzz the Ebon Hawk on their wrist-comms, Teethree's gonna tell 'em that we're all having an afternoon nap."

"(We will not be long, Mission,)" I told her severely. For all that I was starting to have doubts about Bastila's good intentions, the thought of lying to a Jedi did not sit well with me.

Innocent blue eyes appraised me. "Geez, Big Z, you sound like you don't trust me!"

She flounced out of the Ebon Hawk, and I could only follow.

Bright desert sunlight hit my vision as I exited the ship. The docking hangar was open to the elements, and the surrounding walls were laced with Czerka staff. I growled softly under my breath. _Greedy human leeches, all of them. _Their organization was nothing but an official slave trade.

Mission had already stopped a local Paaerduag; those strange creatures with two heads. She started interrogating him cheerfully.

"Hi! I'm looking for the local cantina, can you point me in the right direction?"

The Paaerduag twisted around to face her with its other head, and answered back in his own language. One of his arms gestured towards the large automatic gates that fronted the hangar. Mission turned to beam at me and Jen.

"(Cantina?)" I queried.

"Where else do you find action? 'Sides, I'm hoping for a game of pazaak." She grinned impishly, and headed towards the doors.

As Mission stopped a few other locals, I learnt that the name of this small settlement was Anchorhead, and it was run mostly by Czerka Corporation itself. _We should have stayed onboard the Ebon Hawk. _To me, that meant the village would be rife with corruption and poverty.

It didn't, however, seem too bad as we walked through the sandy courtyards. A trading post was flourishing near the entrance to Anchorhead, and the local hunting lodge was the next hotspot of activity. Mission had already found out that most of the residents were desert hunters, self-proclaimed warriors who spent their time tracking down animals for sport. I clenched my teeth in disgust at that behaviour. _Killing for killing's sake. Canderous Ordo will enjoy it here._

Jen and I trailed our impulsive friend into the nearby cantina, the sound of jaunty bar music entrapping us as we entered. The cantina itself seemed very similar to the one Mission always frequented on Taris, and I saw a look of despondency pass through my young ward's face.

"(Mission?)"

She smiled brightly; falsely. "I'm fine, Big Z. I just – ha! I just expected to see Sancha behind the bar, is all."

"(I am sorry, Mission,)" I said hopelessly. I was not good with words.

"Nah, I'm fine, really." She sniffed. "Though if I ever get the chance, I'm gonna pay back the Sith for what they've done."

"(Do not say that! You do not know who might hear,)" I growled at her warningly.

Mission shrugged at me, and I almost had the feeling she didn't care. She turned her head to look at something, and my eyes scanned the same thing she did. _An inebriated human, passed out on a table. _I saw wicked mischief curve Mission's lips.

"(Do not do it, Mission. You will get-)" I stopped talking when I realized Mission had already sauntered towards the slumbering man. I glanced quickly at Jen, who was staring around the cantina in nervous curiosity. I sighed, and followed Mission. _If she falls into trouble, I must be there to help her out of it. I do not believe Jen will be of much use._ I needed to force some answers out of Bastila. It seemed as if another person had jumped into Jen's body, although I did not understand how this was possible.

Mission was already sitting nonchalantly on the other side of the human, and I could not see one of her hands. _She is always searching the pockets of the drunk. _She noticed me move forward, and gave a little shooing motion with her free arm.

I stared steadily at her and the stranger. His face was pointed away from Mission and towards me, and as she further delved into his pockets his eyes snapped open.

I glared at him, and deliberately lowered my hand to rest on the hilt of my vibroblade. I saw understanding dawn on the human's face. He looked to the side, and then back at me, and gulped. He seemed to think better of making a scene, and closed his eyes once more. _Good. I did not wish to create trouble already._

Mission slipped away from the table and skipped back to me.

"Easy credits, easy target." She smirked. I didn't have the heart to tell her the truth.

Mission headed over to the bar, and approached a Twi'lek who was dressed in dirty combat armour, with a stun stick and a blaster on his belt. I imagined he would be one of the local hunters.

"Hi, my name's Mission Vao. I was wondering if I could ask you some questions?"

The Twi'lek turned to appraise her thoughtfully, and answered back in their native language. "(I am Komad Fortuna, a hunter of Anchorhead. It would seem that you are new here, yes?)"

"(Just visiting Tatooine,)" Mission answered brightly in Twi'leki.

"(What is it you wish to know?)" Komad queried.

"(What is there to do around here?)" she asked bluntly. Komad looked slightly taken aback, and then smiled at her youthful exuberance.

"(Most people come to Tatooine for the hunt. Some arrive for swoop racing, although I do not believe the track here is ve-)"

"There's swoop racing!" Mission reverted back to Basic unthinkingly, positively jumping with excitement. I groaned, and Komad shot me a wary look.

Mission immediately wrangled directions out of Komad, her blue face animated for the first time since we had left Taris.

"(I'll go and check it out. Thanks, Komad. Anything else a newcomer to Tatooine should know?)"

"(I do not believe you will be travelling the dunes as you are not a hunter – but if you do, you'll need a hunting license.)"

"(License? Why?)" Mission sounded curious. _She is not going out there. I will not let her._

"(Czerka controls Anchorhead, and hence the main gates exiting into the dunes.)"

"(Can't people just jump the fence?)"

Komad raised an eyebrow at her. "(Certainly they could, but the guards would attack if they saw. Also, it is not safe.)"

Mission frowned. "(By the sounds of it, the dunes aren't safe anyway.)"

"(True,)" Komad conceded. "(The further south one travels, the more encounters one has with the ferocious Sand People. But even so, it is less dangerous to follow the Czerka markers that lead out of the main gates than it is to jump the fence. I have heard about a rabid group of hulak wraids nearby to the east of Anchorhead, residing by the base of the cliffs. There are even rumours about a person controlling them.)"

"(Geez, don't you hunters kill these wraids?)" Mission had crossed her arms. "(What type of creatures are they, anyway?)"

"(They are a large, lumbering mammal with sharp teeth and a wicked jump. You are right, they are a favourite target for us hunters. But we have not yet been able to eradicate this particular group. They seem to be stronger, and even... intelligent in their attacks. I will be leading a group out tomorrow to try and put a stop to this deranged pack.)"

"(Well, sounds like a place to avoid. Thanks again, Komad.)"

The older Twi'lek nodded at Mission, and she walked back towards me. A definite twinkle had reappeared in her eyes.

"Swoop racing, Big Z!" She grinned spontaneously. "Jen, you can have another go on a bike!"

Jen stared at her. "I- I, no, I don't think I should."

A thunderous scowl dragged Mission's face down, and she was about to retort when a foreign voice interrupted her.

"Mission? Mission Vao?"

We all turned to see a Twi'lek female approaching us. She was wearing what appeared to be a dancer's outfit; shiny and skin-tight. I noticed Mission's expression blackened even more.

"It's me, Lena." The stranger's offered smile of welcome died as she saw Mission's adverse reaction. "Remember? I was dating your brother back on Taris."

"What are you doing here?" Mission snapped. "Where's Griff?"

_Griff? That is the name of her brother that disappeared._ _Is this the horrible girl Mission told me about?_

"I'm just passing through, about to leave Tatooine. Griff and I broke up a week ago." Lena sighed. "Your brother can be charming, Mission, but he's bad news."

"Don't you start trashing my brother, you cantina rat!" Mission snarled. She had taken a step forward, her lekku lashing out behind her. I stiffened in alarm. "Take that back or I'll smack you so hard your head-tails will pop off!"

I could feel a low growl start somewhere in the back of my throat. I understood the concept of family loyalty. Jen had taken a step backwards.

"Wha-? Mission, what's wrong with you? Why are you acting this way?" Lena actually sounded concerned. She flicked a wary glance in my direction.

"What's wrong with me? You took my brother away!"

"(You left a child all alone on the backstreets on Taris. Shame on you,)" I rumbled. Lena shot me a fearful, but unrecognizing glance. It was too much to hope that she could understand Shyriiwook.

"Took your brother away? Bu-but you knew we were going! You didn't want to come along!"

"You liar! Griff told me you didn't want his little sister tagging along - that's why he had to leave me behind!"

"Is that what the Hutt-spawn told you? I wanted you to come with us, Mission. I even offered to pay for your ticket!" The Twi'lek sounded sincere, and for the first time, a little angry as well. _Could she be telling the truth? I had my doubts about the integrity of Mission's brother._

"No - you're the one who's lying!" Mission looked incensed enough to start a brawl.

_Perhaps it is time to intervene. _"(Mission? Why not find out where your brother is?)"

"Where's Griff now anyway?" Mission demanded, after nodding at me.

Lena scowled at her. "He was working for Czerka Corp – here on Tatooine. Another one of his pathetic get-rich-quick schemes. We broke it off a week ago, and he headed off on some Czerka mining quest in the desert."

"Fine. I'll go track him down myself." Mission's lekku were twitching in anger. "He's better off without slimy trash like you, anyway!"

Lena sighed. "I guess that's my cue to leave, then. I didn't mean to upset you, Mission. But one day you'll see I'm right about your brother."

Mission stepped forward again, and I could see she wasn't far away from lashing out. Her face was turning a mottled purple colour. "Go away before I punch your plastic face in!"

"Hang on a minute," Lena had started walking away, but whirled around in fury. "I never did anything to you, Mission. If you-"

I growled loudly, and stepped in front of Mission. I vaguely heard the background patter of conversation die down. Lena looked up at me, and swallowed.

"Okay, I'll go. Just remember this when you find out I'm telling the truth!" The annoyed Twi'lek departed from the cantina quickly, with Mission glaring daggers at her back.

"We have to go to the Czerka office," Mission muttered. "If Griff's there – oh, I hope so! If he's gone on some stupid trip into the desert..."

"(We will find your brother, Mission,)" I promised her. "(Let us go and talk to Czerka.)"

xXx

"I didn't know you had a brother, Mission," Jen asked softly as we approached the local Czerka office.

"He's a bit of a sensitive topic. He's the only family I've ever had!" Mission was still feeling emotive from her encounter with Lena. "Well, apart from Big Z, of course!" She shot a wan smile in my direction.

Family ties were stronger than anything. _Except honour. _My own shame at striking down my brother still clawed at me. _He was wrong, though. He had lost honour. _

And so had I, a voice whispered through my mind. _Madclaw._

A smartly dressed human approached us as we entered the sterile building of Czerka Corporation. I disliked the place immediately. _Awful organization. Would that I could see it in ruins._

"Can I help you? These are the offices of Czerka Corporation," the human female told us primly, eyeing all three of us in turn. She addressed Mission. "I trust you have business with the company?"

"I want to know where Griff Vao is," Mission said stoutly.

"Griff? Uh... there's no Griff here," the protocol officer sounded hesitant, swallowed, and then strove on confidently. "Never heard of him. No, I don't remember a single Griff on the Czerka Corporation payroll."

"You're lying!" Mission shot back. _Greedy untruthful Czerka. _I took a few steps forward next to Mission, folded my arms and glared down at the human. Her eyes widened as she took me in.

"Oh, you mean that Twi'lek!" she stuttered, backing away. "Yes, of course I remember Griff. Bad worker, lots of complaints about him." She took another step backwards. "But it's redundant now, as he was captured on a Sand People raid."

"Captured?" Mission squeaked, her anger turning to shocked fear. "Wh-what do you mean!"

"He was lost in a Sand People raid we suffered five days ago. There were prisoners taken, but our rescue parties never found anyone alive." The Czerka rep's voice had smoothed over again.

"So- what? You just left him out there to die?"

I growled in disgust. The human twisted her head to glance at another official, and made some sort of gesture with her hand. "All miners sign a waiver absolving Czerka Corporation of liability in those circumstances!"

"(Waiver? You selfish humans!)" I roared. _Czerka uses all people like slaves, to make them more credits._

A group of Czerka outfitted guards suddenly rushed into the room, heavily armed. The protocol officer breathed a sigh of relief, and eyed us over beadily. "I am afraid I will have to ask you to leave. You appear to have no business with Czerka Corporation, and we do not take kindly to ruffians creating a scene in our offices."

The guards surrounded us threateningly, and my fury cooled somewhat. I saw a flash of rage twist in Jen's face as she eyed up the opposition, which transformed the remnants of my anger into worry. _She is flicking back to her anger. _

"(Mission, Jen, let us go. We have the information we need,)" I commanded the girls.

Mission was still glaring, but turned around and stalked out of the office, her head held high. Jen was reaching towards her vibroblade.

"(Jen!)" I said in concern.

She turned to scowl at me, and then her expression shattered once more. She shot me a confused, bewildered look, before running out. I followed slowly in concern.

"We've got to go after him, Big Z. He's my brother!" Mission demanded as soon as I walked back out into the bright sunlight.

"(I know, Mission. We will. But we should wait for the others to return, we could use their help.)"

"No!" Mission shot back rapidly. "I want to go now! I don't trust Bastila – she'll never help me!"

"(It's too dangerous, Mission. Especially-)" I shot a look at Jen, who was walking slowly near us. I lowered my voice. "(Especially with Jen.)"

Mission scowled angrily, and walked further into Anchorhead. "Jen can hold her own in battles, can't you Jen?"

"I-I what?" Jen blinked at us both.

"I'm not leaving my brother behind, Big Z! I- oh, bantha crap, that's Bastila!" Her voice lowered to a hiss as she stared at three figures up in the distance. Bastila, Carth and Canderous were busy talking to a guard next to the large gates that protected Anchorhead from the outside desert. "Quick, let's go in here."

Mission grabbed my arm, and dragged me into a dark store we had been standing outside. Jen dashed in behind us. Broken robots and parts littered the store, and I realized we had entered some sort of droid shop.

"Let's just stick in here for a few minutes. Hopefully Bastila will be gone by then," Mission whispered as we walked into the dark interior. "After that, we can jump the village gates to avoid the others, and track down the Sand People."

"(Jump the gates? Mission!)" I wailed in protest. "(The guards will attack us! And you heard what Komad said about the wraids!)"

"I have to rescue Griff, Big Z! And I need your help! There's no way Czerka will give us a hunting licence now, and there's no way I'm asking for help from a Jedi snot who'll get far too much delight in saying no!"

_I do not like this. But I cannot forsake Mission. Though I need to protect Jen. _Life was full of hard choices. I could see that stubborn, contrary look on Mission's face. _She will not be persuaded otherwise. Family is a strong motivator._

But my fear for Jen's behaviour also played a part. I looked at the human in worry as she followed me inside.

"What is this?" the Ithorian shopkeeper addressed us in stumbling Basic. "A customer I don't recognize? Perhaps you bring off-world money to Yuka Laka?"

"Not interested," Mission responded distractedly, her eyes fixed on the door.

"Surely you must have some reason for entering my store? Perhaps I can glean your interest towards my deal of the month? A protocol translation droid that's also combat ready!"

"Geez," Mission rolled her eyes at me. "What would we need a translator for? Jen can already speak every language we've come across."

"This isn't just a standard droid!" the Ithorian protested. "It can even understand Sand People dialects!"

"Are you hard of hearing or something? I said I'm not-" Mission had turned to walk away from the persistent shopkeeper, but whirled around suddenly. "Hang on, did you say Sand People dialects?"

"Yes! It is a very unique robot, I have never heard of one understanding such exotic languages before. And it handles weapons amazingly well!"

Mission was frowning, and walked over to my side quickly. "Big Z," she said in a hushed whisper. "I've got an idea. What if we were to bargain with the Sand People for my brother's life?"

"(Mission, I do not know the first thing about these natives! What if they attack on sight? We should talk to the locals first.)"

"No way! You heard what that Czerka puppet said – Griff's been gone five days! Five days, Big Z! For all I know, he could be dead already! This droid might be our best chance – I simply have to go after him!"

Reluctantly, I nodded. _This shopkeeper has also said the droid is combat ready. That means we have another ally for any danger we meet. _I was beginning to wish we had never set foot off the Ebon Hawk.

As Mission walked away to haggle with the shopkeeper, my eyes flicked back to Jen. She was standing dazedly in a dim corner in the shop.

Talking with a menacing red robot, whose eyes glinted evilly at her from the darkness.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai: Yeah, me too :) Also in my story Malak knows the Jedi know about the Star Maps, so destroying the ruins is a critical move for him - I couldn't see him doing anything else in that situation._

_snackfiend101: Regarding Juhani - Yes. Mwhaha :)_


	23. A new master

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

_**Author's Note** – Many thanks to Curtis for his help with this._

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-three – A new master**

_- HK-47 -_

* * *

Entertainment Routine Initiated: 

Target Analysis:  
Type: Organic Meatbag  
Species: Ithorian, Male  
Name: Yuka Laka  
Occupation: Droid Salesman - Current Owner

Death Scenario: Blaster Shot to Head:  
Survival Chance: 0 percent  
Survival Time: 3.42855 seconds  
Analysis: Too Quick

…_/Some time later/…_

Death Scenario: Drop On Hoth.  
Estimated Survival Chance: 0.00129 percent # # #  
Estimated Survival Time: 9558.18116 ± 3109.28884 seconds  
Analysis: Amusing. Limited Viewing Potential  
Optional Scenario: Drop Naked On Hoth

Death Scenario: Drop On Korriban With "Give Peace A Chance" Sign Attached  
Estimated Survival Chance: 0.09023 percent  
Estimated Survival Time: 727441.00259 ± 727441.00259 seconds  
Analysis: Survival Time Too Dependant On Finder. Limited Viewing Potential

Death Scenario: Removal of Skin  
Survival Chance: 0 percent  
Estimated Survival Time: 532771.38841 ± 94635.40081 seconds  
Analysis: Highly Amusing. Satisfyingly Slow  
Optional Variables: Weak Acids, Sodium Chloride

Entertainment Routine Interrupted

Three Organic Meatbags Entering Targeting Area

Analysis: First Meatbag  
Species: Twi'lek, Female  
Facial Recognition Result: Negative  
Body Language Analysis: Happy – Youthful – Alert – Impulsive – Non Aggressive  
Probable Personality: Irritating Young Thief  
Personality Compatibility: 23.78567 percent  
Assigned Temporary Name: Gizka Spawn

Analysis: Second Meatbag  
Species: Wookiee, Male  
Facial Recognition Result: Negative  
Body Language Analysis: Alert – Skilled Combatant – Introspective – Intelligent – Honest – Non Aggressive  
Probable Personality: Quiet Warrior  
Personality Compatibility: 18.37846 percent  
Assigned Temporary Name: Mobile Carpet

Analysis: Third Meatbag  
Species: Human, Female  
Facial Recognition Result: Error 1x0EEEFF. Attempted Access to Locked Memory Core Files  
Sequence Failed  
Body Language Analysis: Shy – Confident – Alert – Impulsive – Aggressive – Non Aggressive – Confused – Wary – Angry - Meek  
Probable Personality: Unable to Compute - Conflicting Data. Closer Observation Required  
Personality Compatibility: Unable to Compute. Calculation Aborted

Hidden User Defined Sub-Routine Activated: Personality Compatibility Set To 100 percent

Interrupt:  
_…_Quick Self Diagnostic Routine Activated  
_…_Result: No Errors Detected  
_…_Self Diagnostic Scheduled  
Return to New Target Analysis

Assigned Temporary Name: Enigmatic Meatbag

Conclusion: Preferred Owner: Enigmatic Meatbag

Auditory Sensors Set to Scan Targets Conversations

Input – Yuka Laka to Gizka Spawn: "What is this? A customer I don't recognize? Perhaps you bring off-world money to Yuka Laka?"

Input – Gizka Spawn to Yuka Laka: "Not interested."

Input – Yuka Laka to Gizka Spawn: "Surely you must have some reason for entering my store? Perhaps I can glean your interest towards my deal of the month? A protocol translation droid that's also combat ready!"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Pleading

Visual Tracking: Enigmatic Meatbag Moving Closer

Preferred Owner in Effective Communication Range

Conversation Routines Activated:  
Topic: Purchasing Me  
Auditory Sensors Set to Focus on Enigmatic Meatbag

Output: "Greeting: Hello to you, prospective purchaser. I am referred to as HK-47, a fully functional Systech Corporation droid skilled in both combat and protocol functions. Query: Would you be so kind as to purchase this model from Yuka Laka?"

Input – Enigmatic Meatbag: "Er, I-I don't think I need... have I seen you before?"

Output: "Answer: I do not have access to your memory, prospective purchaser. Extrapolation: I cannot access my own core memory files, so I cannot say whether I have seen you."

Observation – Muffled Conversation Occurring Between Gizka Spawn and Mobile Carpet

Input – Enigmatic Meatbag: "Why don't you have access to your core memory?"

Output: "Explanation: I have been recently fitted with a restraining bolt, if you must know. With it in place, access to much of my memory core is restricted."

Conversation Analysis:  
Current Topic: Inability to Access Memory Core  
Conclusion: Conversation Moving Away From Required Topic  
Attempting to Refresh Topic

Output: "Request: Please consider purchasing me, prospective buyer."

Input – Enigmatic Meatbag: "Uh, I don't have any credits."

Visual Tracking: Gizka Spawn and Mobile Carpet Moving Closer

Input – Gizka Spawn to Yuka Laka: "This is the droid I'm buying? Creepy looking thing."

Input – Mobile Carpet to Enigmatic Meatbag _(Shyriiwook):_ "(Jen? Are you okay?)"

Permanent Name Assigned: Jen to Enigmatic Meatbag

Input – Jen to Mobile Carpet: "I - yes. I just had the strangest feeling..."

Input – Gizka Spawn: "So, what's your name?"

Light Impact Detected:  
Source: Gizka Spawn  
Combat Mode Initiated:  
Interrupt:  
_…_External Pacifism Routines Activated  
_…_Source: Restraining Bolt  
Return to Main  
Exiting Combat Mode

Quick Response Analysis:  
Appropriate Verbal Responses Would Reduce Chance of Purchase  
Conclusion: Ignore Gizka Spawn

Input – Gizka Spawn: "What sort of robot are you? Can ya even speak?"

Input – Mobile Carpet _(Shyriiwook): _"(Odd. It responded to Jen.)"

Input – Gizka Spawn: "Sheesh, what sort of trash heap is this thing?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Annoyed

Input – Yuka Laka: "The unit has been a little uncooperative. They get that way when they go too long without a memory wipe."

Input – Gizka Spawn: "It's just ignoring me!"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Petulant

Input – Jen: "Why did you want me to buy you, instead of Mission?"

Permanent Name Assigned: Mission to Gizka Spawn

Output: "Extrapolation: You are no farmer or diplomat. The Twi'lek is still young. Even as a droid, I am allowed a preference of owner."

Input – Mission to Yuka Laka: "I'm beginning to think you ripped me off."

Input – Yuka Laka to Mission: "You talked me down to two thousand credits! It will behave and treat you as its master as soon as I have removed the restraining bolt!"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Protesting

Output: "Objection! I have no desire to be owned by a childish blue meatbag!"

Input – Mission: "Yeah, well, I don't like you either! As far as I'm concerned, Jen can take care of you!"

Input – Jen: "Uh, say what?"

Input – Mission to Jen: "As long as it can talk to the Sand People, I don't care who it obeys. Let's just buy this stupid thing and hit the desert."

Input – Yuka Laka: "If that is what you want. HK-47, your new master is this human."

Output: "That is most satisfactory."

External Sensors Registering Removal of Restraining Bolt  
Quick Self Diagnostic Routine Activated  
Result: Previously Restricted Routines Now Accessible  
Removal of Restraining Bolt Confirmed

Output: "Statement: I see you have purchased me, master. I find this a satisfactory arrangement."

Output: "Query: Am I to accompany you now? Query: Would you like me to kill something for you?"

Input – Jen: "Kill something for me?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Worried

Output: "Answer: Indeed. I am most eager to engage in some unadulterated violence."

Targeting: Yuka Laka.

Hidden User Defined Sub-Routine Activated: Owner Command Required.  
Interrupt:  
_…_Quick Self Diagnostic Routine Activated  
_…_Result: No Errors Detected.  
_…_Thorough System Diagnostic Scheduled.  
Return to Main.

Output: "At your command, of course, master."

* * *

xXx

* * *

**_# # # Note:_** _ - this equates roughly to a 775-1 chance_


	24. Alone with the darkness

**_Disclaimer - see chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-four – Alone with the darkness**

_- Juhani -_

* * *

I could sense something dark approaching. _A challenge. _But the presence pulsed on and off in the Force, weak enough to make me doubt my own senses, strong enough to make me cry for what might have been. 

_Fallen to the darkness. I cannot turn back._

My pretties howled at my distress, they were interlinked with me. Such strong, hulking creatures; a testament to my might. Even the Sand People feared to tread this corner of the desert.

The strangers were close now, but I could no longer sense the Force with any of them. _Regardless, they shall die for invading these sand dunes. My sanctuary. MINE. _

But I wanted to be the one to finish them. Normally my pretties would have that pleasure, but this time I would do it personally. I would show I was strong enough to finish the Force user I could sense.

Strong enough for the dark side; for I had failed the light.

I closed my eyes, and let my concentration drift outwards; mentally focusing on the approaching figures.

I could hear a young voice; bright, hopeful, what I might once have been.

"We'll find him, I just know we will!"

"Query: Can I silence the blue meatbag, master? Please?"

Perhaps they were hunters, using droids as backup to counter their own weakness.

"No!" A horrified answer.

That voice, now, was the one I had sensed. No power emanating anymore. _How can someone switch on and off in the Force like that?_

"(We should not be so close to the cliffs. Remember Komad's warning.)" A howl in Shyriiwook. It was odd for a Wookiee to venture outside of Kashyyyk, but he would be no match for me.

"We'll be fine, Big Z! We'll be able to see any of those hulak things a mile off. 'Sides, we're heading south, back to the Czerka markers."

"Anticipation: I hope to see some animals to blast."

"Geez, would you shut up already?"

The strangers crested a nearby dune, and I saw them through my own eyes. A young Twi'lek, a female human, a robot and a Wookiee. _Invaders. How dare they disturb my peace! _

_Peace... would that I could have some._

The Twi'lek girl stopped and stared at me with surprised and innocent eyes. I activated my lightsaber. I wished only to challenge the human. _I will show how strong the darkness can be. It is all I have left, and it will be enough! _

It had to be.

"Fools!" I howled, "I shall be your doom!"

The sweet taste of the Force filled me, swirled sickeningly through me, and I sent out a swift pulse to the young girl. She froze, in stasis. The Wookiee roared in angry surprise, a sound cut off as I quickly incapacitated him.

The droid lifted his weaponry, and I snarled.

"No!" the human cried sharply in distress.

One of my strongest abilities had been the electro-magnetic side of the force. _Droids are no match for me._

"Targettiiiinnn...eeeee." A quick surge of static ran from my fingertips; now the droid was stationary and smoking. I could hear a fizzling noise. Signs of fear and grief on the human's face.

She was holding a vibroblade limply. I had hoped she would have been skilled enough to wield a lightsaber.

"Please, let them go!" she pleaded pathetically. Her voice, terrified and uncertain.

I laughed mockingly, and pointed my blood red lightsaber at her, indicating my next target.

"Who are you?" she whispered, and stepped backwards in fright. _She should be afraid._

"I am Juhani, and this is my grove! You should not have come here!" The Force thrummed through my veins, urged on by my emotions. Once, I used serenity and peace to strengthen my power. Now, I could only use rage.

I took a step towards her.

The woman's eyes were fearfully wide as she stared at my advance, but she broke our gaze to eye over her helpless companions.

Her pale, petrified expression shattered.

She snapped her head around to face me, her expression hardening with resolve.

"Let them go!" she growled in a deeper, darker voice. Her eyes narrowed to focus on me again, and a twist of rage tightened her features. I noticed her chest heaving with breaths of anger.

I closed in further, and laughed mockingly at the battle of emotions on her face. "Weak Jedi... you are no match for the Dark Side!"

"I am not a Jedi," the stranger said softly, eyes meeting mine. Green eyes. Deep, complex.

_Like Quatra's. No... Quatra._

I wailed in grief at the memory, and charged towards her, aiming a slash at her face. Her vibroblade came up to block, but I forced it down towards her body. She yelped as my lightsaber seared the coating of her armour, and leaped backwards.

"You are with the Sith then?" the woman hissed, taking another step away. I was not used to combatants talking.

"I am with the darkness alone!" I charged, and tried for a slash at her legs. She stumbled to the side, dodging just in time.

"Who trained you?"

I bared my teeth, and Force pushed her. She fell, and I sprung forward to stab her. My saber grazed along her back as she quickly rolled away.

I let her get to her feet.

"If you want a challenge, then you've got one," she told me coldly, threateningly. I could see the fiery rage of hate burn in her eyes. "But let the girl go. She's no use to you."

I laughed again, a hollow sound from my throat. "You care for the girl? You are foolish."

She glanced beyond me then, and I could feel my loyal ones in the distance, yapping in anguish. Confused for their master. _Uncertain just like me._

_No! I am steadfast._

"The wraids," she said, holding her vibroblade in a defensive posture. "Their actions, their craziness, are due to you?"

"Yes..." I responded, an empty smile curving my lips. "Aren't they pretty? They like the smell of the power I exude. They know their master."

"The Queen of Wraids? Bit of an empty life you've got there, Juhani," she mocked in a snide tone. _She dares to mock me!_

"I am more powerful than you could ever dream of being!" I roared. The heat of anger returned in a fierce wave, ruffling the fur on my neck. I ran at her again, slashing, hacking, stabbing. She blocked and dodged, but the occasional blow fell true. I could tell I was the stronger. I could smell the tinny scent of her blood on the wind. "I harnessed true power when I struck down my master! I revel in my darkness! I adore it!"

"Why are you trying to convince me?" she hissed. "Unless you truly don't?"

_How dare she question me? _Grief. Uncertainty.

I howled again, and resumed my flurry of attacks. It was a crazy reign of blows, and she barely held her own. Blood dripped from her in several places, and her left arm dangled limply at her side.

My next strike would have cut her in two, had she not twisted out of the way so quickly. _She has yet to use the Force, I wonder why?_ I melded the Force together in a ball and slammed it into her abdomen. She tumbled down the slope like a rag doll, grunting as she landed on her injured side.

"Use the Force, so I can prove I am the master!" I challenged. "I will kill you far too easily this way."

Dripping sweat mixed with blood trickled down the edges of her grimy face as she stood, panting in exertion. I idly threw my lightsaber at her. She blocked it, but stumbled backwards with the effort. The weapon flew back to my hand expertly.

"Are you too weak to use the Force in battle?" I taunted softly.

"I – am – trying – to!" she snarled through gritted teeth. I saw fury claim her face once more. I laughed, and advanced. Two more steps, and the Force propelled me into the air, so I could strike her down on landing. She jumped backwards in time to avoid a fatal blow, but gave a piercing scream as my saber gouged deeply into her shoulder.

_Time to stop playing with her. If she will not give me a challenge, I will kill her now._

The black power bubbled within me. I shaped it. Moulded it into something hideous, and cast it out to poison her soul. She gagged, and stumbled away. I could feel the venomous Force taint deep inside her, dragging at her limbs, twisting her very being. _Blood. _Blood oozed out of her armour like thick, black honey.

"No!" she shouted in denial. The anger turned to hate on her face. _Evil rage... like mine._

_Rage at myself._

"I will not go down like this!" she screamed, and I felt a glimpse of raw power from her as she choked on my poison. _What I sensed earlier. She is strong. _She gathered my own tainted Force energy from within her system, and hurled it from her. It was only when I felt the poison gnawing at my body and my mind, that I realized she had thrown it straight back at me. _That is possible? _My guard was down, and I lurched backwards, dark taint mixing with dark emotion inside me. The sheer power she exuded was enough for me to fear her, but all at once the feeling disappeared, and she became forceless again.

She growled, and lunged at me. Her attacks were frenzied, reckless, unpredictable. I found myself dodging for the first time. My own poison, slowing me down.

"I will win this!" I yelled, and pushed her away again. I could hear her growling as she was shoved backwards by an invisible wave of energy. I used the Force to sense her physically, and pushed against her throat, tightening, clenching. She choked, her good hand clutching at the invisible constriction. I was skilled enough to hamper her breathing, but not to render her motionless.

The stranger fell to her knees, and my hold on her throat loosened. _Still need practice with that trick. _Her eyes were emerald daggers of undiluted hate as she jumped back to her feet, her emotions strong enough to bypass the pain of her injuries.

She lunged at me again, but I parried easily.

"You will bow to ME!" she shrieked in a deep voice that resonated with malevolent viciousness. Her explosion of anger was accompanied by a powerful ripple of pure energy. A sense of foreboding tiptoed eerily down my spine. _I am in over my head. _

I saw blank shock pass through her green eyes, and the power vanished abruptly. _She didn't mean to say that. She doesn't understand the darkness; she doesn't embrace it. I am the master here!_

Another flurry of blows, as I jumped on the offensive again. She was snarling like a rabid hound, her teeth bared and her mouth stretched. _The anger has her... but I am the stronger._

"The Force has failed you!" I slashed at her side. She dodged, and stabbed unsuccessfully at my legs with her feeble vibroblade. I struck again, scoring a hit on her good arm. Part of me marvelled at her ability to continue fighting despite the injuries she was receiving.

_Now it is time to put her out of her misery. Now it is time to prove that the Dark Side is enough for me._

"If you will not use the Force, I will end it here!" I drew in the power deeply, and used it to pull her weapon out of her grip. It went sailing behind me. I could see fear, disbelief, anger on her face. _My darkness still has strength. _

I sent a solid push of energy out to her, strong enough to topple her backwards. She fell with a thud.

"I am your doom!" I yelled triumphantly as I closed in, and lowered my lightsaber ready to stab her through the heart.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - heheh :) Originally Teethree was going to be Mobile Trash Can, but I ended up leaving him behind._

_Akasha15 - Thanks! It was difficult, though to be honest that chapter has been in the works for a long time now. Also had help with it :)_

_Brynn, Mats Forsen, Data & gamefreak152 - thanks for the continued encouragement! Really appreciate it._

_Dark Lord Daishi - hehe, what else does an evil droid do to pass the time:)_

_snackfiend101 - Regarding Juhani - wait no longer..._

_Feza - Cheers :) Yeah, poor Bastila's getting the brunt of it, isn't she? She's about to get even more freaked out...(and I thought Carth needed a holiday!)_

_Firera - ahhh...guess I am :)_

_Red Mage Neko - There will be blasting from HK...but he doesn't really get the chance in this chapter. Read on!_

_Lilina - Yeah, that was the impression I was trying to create :) Thanks!_


	25. A turning point

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-five – A turning point**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

"Are you too weak to use the Force in battle?" the Cathar mocked me, her slanted yellow eyes glinting in triumph. She was winning, and I was fighting a battle on more than one front. 

The opaque window of Jen Sahara that clouded my psyche was cracking; and as shards of her clattered away, a sense of stark reality shone in like raw sunlight after a numbing storm.

I had not felt this alive since Taris.

Fearful rage interleaved through my mind, and a strong desire to see this feline stranger dead at my hands followed in its wake.

**_Jen? Stop it! Anger leads to the dark side! What's going on?_** Bastila's uncertain voice, demanding and pleading all at once.

"I – am – trying!" I snarled back at the crazy Dark Jedi, ignoring Bastila for the meantime. I could sense the Force dancing and flickering around me, but my feeble attempts to clutch at it were rebuffed by some unseen hand. I'd used it back on Taris, but on other occasions it had failed me there. Now it was failing me here, also. _How could I have thought the bond wasn't real? And the Force? What's been going on – who am I?_

**_What do you mean? You are Jen Sahara! _**Bastila, again, more panicked than ever.

A meek voice in my head echoed her statement faintly, but it was no longer compelling enough to convince me.

_Shut up! _I snarled back to her ferociously in the recesses of my swirling mind.

Juhani laughed low in her throat; a purr almost. She took a few running steps, and I somehow intuitively knew a Force-propelled jump was coming.

_She used to be a Guardian._

I sprung backwards, but not quickly enough to avoid her blood red saber as it sliced into my shoulder. A shriek of anger and pain ripped out of my lungs; my shoulder burned and throbbed as I stumbled away.

**_You are in pain? Where are you? _**Bastila demanded again. **_You didn't – you left the Hawk, didn't you!_**

Juhani raised a hand, and I could mentally see the dark wave of Force power directed at me. _No way to dodge that, _I thought as I leaped to the side regardless.

It engulfed me, searing deep into my limbs.

"No!" I screamed as I felt the dark oozing of something wrong, something evil, taint my body inside. _Force poison. _My limbs felt drugged, slowed. _Drugged? _A flicker of recollection hit me. _Bastila, you bitch! You drugged me!_

**_No! I had no choice! Please, I can explain!_** her mental voice gasped.

I stumbled backwards, gagging as the venom slowly drained my life away. I clutched onto the vibroblade tightly with my good hand; my left arm was becoming near useless.

As the Cathar advanced, fear coiled deep within my rage. _I can't win this, unless I use the Force! _It was still there, surrounding me, taunting me with its inaccessibility. I growled deeply, and thrust out towards it again. My mental lunge landed against an invisible barrier, a shield, caging me away from the Force. _What is that? That isn't right!_

All at once, it gave way under my pressure, and the sweet taste of power filled me.

A renewed sense of panic emanated fiercely from Bastila.

"I will not go down like this!" I snarled as the Force sang through my limbs, lifting the aching tiredness and diluting the agony of injuries received. I somehow _squeezed_ the power through my body, and the venom spiraled away. I didn't know how I did it; I was working on intuition alone. The spiritual poison was thrown back at Juhani, and she stumbled in surprise.

_Get her, now!_

I sprung forward and attacked, my vibroblade whirling and striking wildly on the Cathar. For the first time, she was on the defensive and I pressed my advantage. She moved slowly, her own poison working against her. I breathed the Force in deeper, but it was sharply cut off from me again. Pushed away; inaccessible. _No!_

The Cathar shoved me away with a wave of energy, and a growl of pure determined rage snarled from my throat as I was dragged backwards. I fought her Force attack with every muscle, every sinew, but it was useless without having access to the Force myself.

"I will win this!" Juhani shrieked, and I felt a tightening band around my throat close in, restrict my breathing. I choked, clutching desperately as my throat as I lurched away from her. _She calls this a Force grip? Pathetic! _So the dark, arrogant voice said inside my head, but I still fell to my knees under the weight of it. _I must fight this! _

Her tight clamp on my windpipe loosened and disappeared, and my returning fury pushed me back up to my feet. _I will not go down to some half-trumped runaway Jedi! _

**_Wh-what? Runaway Jedi? Where are you? _**Bastila was pleading now.

_First I will get rid of this annoying Cathar, and then we'll see about Bastila's presence in my mind._ I choked slightly through my raw throat, but lunged angrily at Juhani anyway.

"You will bow to ME!" I yelled menacingly at her. _She will bow, or she will die. No one can withstand me! _The barrier blocking my Force access crumpled underneath my rage, and once more the humming life of the Force recharged me. _This stranger will defer to me! I am the master!_

Another wave of pure frightened panic stormed from Bastila.

Shock passed through the feline eyes of the Cathar, and I paused in surprise as the full weight of my own words hit me. _I didn't mean to say that. What am I thinking?_ Yet again, I felt something snap cleanly through my attachment to the Force. _Who's doing that? The Force doesn't act that way!_

**_Bu-but you don't – you can't know how the Force works!_**

_Bastila? Do you have something to do with this block?_

Silence through the bond.

I saw a mask of superiority fall back down on Juhani's face. "The Force has failed you!" she crowed triumphantly, and leaped forward to meet me again, slashing with her saber. My useless vibroblade managed to hold off any fatal damage, but I was getting nowhere. Fast.

_I need the Force. I need it NOW! _I stabbed angrily at Juhani's legs, but she easily dodged in time. She retaliated fiercely by searing her weapon into my sword arm. My breath gushed out in a hiss as I swallowed through the pain, letting the rage fuel my movements.

**_I-I, No! Tell me where you are! _**Bastila sounded hesitant, now.

I reached out to the Force again, hammering uselessly at the invisible net that trapped me from salvation, striving to evade death by crazed Cathar as I did so.

_Must be logical. I've broken these shields twice today, and used the Force numerous times on Taris. _But on half of those occasions I couldn't reach it when I tried.

Pazaak in the Upper City. _Didn't work in the Lower City, though. _Persuaded the Sith guards. Speed numerous times in the sewers. _But again I tried on the swoop track, and to no avail. How had I broken through this odd shield all those successful times?_

A moment of clarity struck me as I lurched away from Juhani's long reach. Every instance on Taris was when Bastila had been unconscious through the mind-link. _It **is** her!_

The only real time I'd destroyed her shields was today, through brute rage.

"If you will not use the Force, I will end it here!" the Cathar yelled, and my vibroblade flew wildly out of my hand. My body was failing me, my rage was dissipating into fear and denial.

_No weapon, now. _I stared at the Cathar in disbelief. _It will not end here, it cannot end here! Where is that damned Force? BASTILA! You're blocking me!_

_**Jen! Please, I had to! For your own safety!**_

_My own safety? _Boiling bubbles of fury crested through exhausted limbs. _This deranged Cathar will kill me if you don't back off, right now, and let me use the Force!_

"I am your doom!" Juhani crowed over me, whirling her lightsaber towards my chest.

I reached out in angry panic, and the flood of raw power flushed electrifyingly through my system and outwards.

I snarled, and suddenly Juhani was frozen above me, her saber an inch from my heart.

I blinked, and rolled away. _Did I do that? _Force or no Force, I really had no idea what I was doing.

My vibroblade glinted at me from a distance, and my hand rose of its own volition. Instinctively I drew in on the Force, and the weapon came flying back to my hand.

I was unprepared for Juhani's lightsaber to come whirling back at me also. I dodged, and the weapon fell behind me, deactivating.

Juhani snarled and stumbled, breaking free of the stasis.

_I have the Force now. She will die! _A cold smile curved my lips as I eyed the angry Cathar over. I took a step backwards, and grabbed her saber. It hissed slowly as I turned it on.

_**Jedi do not kill!**_

_I'm not a Jedi, Bastila! And would you stop distracting me?_

I held the red lightsaber in my primary hand, whirling it experimentally. Sharp pangs of agony pierced through both shoulders, but the Force riding my system allowed me to ignore it. With the vibroblade in my off-hand, I felt at ease. _Two weapons. I fight with two weapons. _

"You are strong," Juhani murmured, as she eyed me over. I could see the disillusionment on her face. _She knows this is her end, now. _"Stronger than me, even in my darkness."

I laughed triumphantly, and advanced. Bitter resolve clouded the Cathar's face, and she faced me resolutely. She lifted her hand, and the Force pulsed out.

I instinctively deflected the mental blow, and the power vibrated throughout me. Dancing through my veins, alive and electric. Consciously I did not know how to wield it, but some slumberous part of me took hold and warped the Force, radiating it outwards. Bright hot sparks danced across my vision, and static streaks of charged bolts jumped from my raised fingertips.

Juhani screamed as the electricity embraced her lithe body. Cold raging victory curved my lips as I watched her dispassionately, writhing in pain.

**_This is not the way! _**Bastila was shrieking, a tiny voice of conscience in my head.

I blocked it out.

I heard a sharp squeal from behind me. _Mission. _I dropped the Force suddenly, and whirled around in surprise. My companions had at last broken free from their stasis; Juhani no longer able to hold them.

"Mission? Zaalbar!" The Wookiee had fallen to his knees. _What am I becoming?_

"I-Jen?" Mission's weak voice. I ran over to her. _Caring for friends is a weakness._ She coughed, and scrabbled to her feet, her eyes wide as she looked behind me.

"Are you okay?" I demanded.

"Yeah, I'm fine. What happened? Big Z!" Mission twirled around and ran to the Wookiee's side.

"End it!" Juhani demanded in a desolate voice, snapping back my attention. "End my torment!"

_You don't have to ask me twice! _I smirked, resolve renewed, and walked towards the Cathar. Mission gasped behind me, and I faltered. _Can I kill someone in cold blood, in front of Mission?_

_I don't answer to anyone! _I took another step forward, and heard Zaalbar grunt. Juhani was standing defenseless in front of me, brave pride holding her head high as she faced her end. Scorch marks and blood darkened the short downy fur on her arms. I paused again. _Mission and Zaalbar are watching._

_So what? They are nothing to me! _I lifted Juhani's lightsaber towards her neck, and saw dark acceptance on the Cathar's face. Mission sobbed behind me.

_No!_

"Kill me now, while you still have the power," Juhani whispered, her face close to mine. I stared into those tormented yellow eyes, and the maelstrom of emotions there reflected my own. Against my volition, my fingers hit the power switch on the lightsaber. It retracted, hissing as it deactivated.

Her eyes widened. "What is it you want?"

I could smell the blood on her. She stood wearily in front of me, barely staying on her feet.

_To know who I am. To not have voices in my head. To be able to use the Force, consistently. _Now there's a thought. "I'll let you live, Cathar, if you teach me how to use the Force properly," I said softly.

Juhani took a step back in surprise, shocked laughter escaping her lips. "You cannot be serious! I-I have fallen! I am too weak for the Jedi, and too weak for the Dark Side!"

"Such insecurity," I mocked her, and saw the resultant anger flash in her tilted eyes.

"Leave me to my agony, or kill me now!"

_Why do I not just kill her?_ I felt a shield close over my Force senses, and it was cut off yet again. _Bastila._

**_Maybe now you will listen to me, and tell me what is going on! _**She sounded imperious, but I could hear the quavering underneath her tone.

_Do you want me to die, or something? _Bone-aching tiredness and thrumming pain came back in full force.

"Ever had voices in your head, Juhani?" I asked the Cathar dryly. She blinked at me, and I could tell she didn't know what to make of me. _I don't know what to make of me. _

I couldn't trust Bastila, but she held the power over me. Juhani was the first Force-user I'd come across, barring Bastila. _If I can convince this crazy Cathar to help me break through Bastila's shields, then I can be on my way. _It had nothing to do with not wishing to kill a defenseless person in front of Mission and Zaalbar. Nothing at all.

"In return for your life, I ask little," I told her steadily. "I just wish some training."

"Training? You, who bested me?" She sounded incredulous.

"I don't know what I'm doing with the Force," I told her flatly, and sheathed my vibroblade. I held onto her deactivated saber; I did not think she was a threat anymore, but I wasn't stupid, either. "Tuition seems a sensible course, and you've obviously had some Jedi training."

"When I slew my Master, Quatra, I knew I could never go back," she mumbled at me. "I embraced the Dark Side, and fled Dantooine. I revelled in my strong power. Power enough to crush the life of any who dared to find me. Or so I thought."

My eyes narrowed. "You embraced the Dark Side, yet you ran away to hide on some remote desert planet? I don't believe you're as far down the dark road as you may think, Juhani."

"Why are you talking at me still?" she snarled suddenly. "I cannot help you – I will not help you! I am nothing!"

"Nothing?" I snapped derisively. "No, you only managed to incapacitate a Twi'lek, a Wookiee and an insane robot with a wave of your hand!" I turned back to look at HK-47; he was still out of action. "Speaking of which, you owe me for repair parts. That's going to be at least a hundred credits." I folded my arms and stared back defiantly at the Cathar. I heard Mission snort behind me.

She shook her head in bafflement. "Wh-who are you? Are you just going to hound me constantly until I agree to your incredible demands?"

"Sounds good to me." I smirked. _If I can get this Cathar to teach me the Force, then I'll-_

**_WHAT? _**Bastila's resounding scream echoed through my head, and I winced, raising a hand to cradle my face. **_Instead of killing whoever you have encountered, you are using them as a teacher?_**

_Talk about your permanent migraine. _Every time I thought I sensed Bastila at her most demanding, panicked, fearful state; her emotions seemed to top a new level. _You're going to give yourself a heart attack at this rate, _I shot back to her.

"H-how can you be so foolish as to ask this?" Juhani queried, her eyes serious. "I have fallen, and I can never go back. Yet you would trust me to teach you?"

"I don't trust you, Juhani," I said flatly. "Make one wrong move and I will kill you without a thought. However, keep your anger under control and we might just have a working relationship."

**_No. No! I will teach you! _**Bastila demanded in my head.

_You have a lot to answer for, Bastila. _I responded coldly.

**_I- yes. Perhaps I do. But I will not entrust your Force tutelage to some strange evil Force-user you have just met!_**

I laughed suddenly, and wary surprise flicked through the Cathar's face. "And now she wants to teach me," I muttered to myself. "Damn you, Bastila Shan." She was becoming as bad as Carth in keeping me off-balance.

"Who- what did you say?" Juhani whispered, blinking at me. "You know Bastila Shan?"

I stared at her warily, and fired a thought in Bastila's direction. _Bastila, heard of a Cathar called Juhani before?_

She was silent for a moment; a tense knot inside my head. **_That is who you met? _**Her emotions had calmed somewhat; I could sense she had reached a modicum of control. **_She was a Padawan at the Enclave. Disappeared a few years ago. Her master searched for her in vain._**

I frowned at the Cathar staring back at me. _She said she killed her master._

_**No, but she came close. Please, bring her to me. She cannot have fallen far to the Dark Side. I can help her.**_

"Yes, I know her," I responded finally to Juhani. "Annoying stuck-up Jedi. Won't stop yelling at me, inside my own head."

"In-inside your head? Are you telepathic?"

"I- oh, I don't know," I said grumpily. _I need some time alone. Away from this angry Cathar, away from the yelling Bastila. _Mission and Zaalbar had limped slowly to my side, and Juhani's eyes flicked over them warily. Mission laid a small hand on my arm. _Away from anyone I care about. _Caring was a weakness. Wasn't it?

"Let's go. Bastila wants to talk to you, and you owe me some Force lessons," I told the Cathar. "I'm holding onto your lightsaber, though."

"What about Griff?" Mission piped up. _That's right. Her stupid brother._

"I don't think we're in any shape for that today, Mission. Let's head back first."

"What if Bastila tries to stop us going out again?"

"Oh, she won't." I smiled coldly at the Twi'lek. "She can try, if she likes. In fact, I almost hope she does."

xXx

Zaalbar had managed to fix HK rather quickly, and I was impressed by the Wookiee's skills. _That could come in handy. _Mission and Zaalbar were throwing me worried glances as we trudged back across the dunes, but I knew they were loyal. Juhani was stumbling ahead in front of us; I did not wish that crazy Cathar at my back.

The desert wraids had all vanished, and I wondered idly if Juhani's hold over them had disappeared. She seemed calmer; resigned to whatever fate I was leading her. _She may have a low opinion of her own strength, but I do not. Anyone who could have some degree of control over those hulking beasts is someone to respect._

"HK, you fell rather quickly," I commented, eyeing over the red robot.

"Explanation: it would seem that my shields have been degraded over time. Suggestion: an upgrade is surely needed," he responded in his metallic voice. I pondered over the strange sense of familiarity that struck me back in the droid shop. _Back then, I still fully believed I was Jen. _My last clear memory had been the exhilarating battle on the Taris swoop track, and the dash to safety afterwards. Everything that occurred after that was a hazy muddle of barely remembered events. _Just like the Endar Spire. I will not let this happen again. _A surge of furious determination swelled throughout me.

"You're okay now, right Jen?" Mission asked, breaking through my angry thoughts.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I lied.

"B-but we're heading back now to the others. To Bastila," Mission stammered.

"(She will not do anything more to you, Jen,)" Zaalbar rumbled softly.

"I don't think she'd dare," I told them softly. _That's right, they blame Bastila. Has Bastila been controlling me via this fake pathetic persona? _I had a vague, distant recollection of talking to a man in a white coat back on Taris. Stumbling back to our apartment in a dazed stupor afterwards. Everything since then- all that had occurred- was vague, cloudy. _Interesting that I can recall all of Jen's history and early memories with stark clarity. _It was like having a database for the pathetic residing in my head.

"Query: Can I blast this meatbag?" HK asked, waving his weapon at Juhani's retreating back. I'd already had to restrain him when Zaalbar had first reactivated him.

"No, not yet, HK. In fact, don't blast anyone unless I say so, or they threaten one of us."

"Plea: But master-!"

I laughed. I was beginning to really like this robot. _Have I seen him before? _My memories were still as tangled as ever, despite the recession of Jen. I could still flick through her life's encounters, but detachedly. I wondered if she was gone for good. _I might just shoot myself if she takes over again. Ugh, what an imbecile. _

The impish street kid or Evil Bitch – which one was I now? It felt like a warped mixture of both.

_Bastila will know what's going on with my mind. _But did I really want to hear? Could I trust anything that came out of that snobby woman's mouth? _She drugged me. She lied about Aldaraan, and headed towards Dantooine instead. _I frowned, and wondered what was so special about Dantooine. _Juhani mentioned she had fled that planet also. Is that a Jedi base? _It sounded like it. Which meant Bastila had tried to herd me towards a trap.

My anger stirred once more, in heat waves over my skin. _I will not let any Jedi capture me. No matter what is wrong with my mind. _I would learn what I needed to use the Force from both Bastila and Juhani, and then I would disappear. _Just enough so I can embrace the Force consistently. Juhani may be able to teach me how to combat Bastila's hold over the mind-link._

_Bastila will not betray me again._

The stone walls of Anchorhead rose up to meet us in the distance, and Juhani paused up ahead. I noticed then that her tattered robes were muddy; smeared in dirt and blood.

"Bet you'll be glad for a shower," I muttered at her as I walked closer. Her tilted eyes flicked over me in confused puzzlement.

"I do not understand you," she said softly. "I tried to kill you, and you act as if it never happened! I have embraced the Dark Side, and yet you leave yourself open to attack!"

"Peace, Juhani, give over already," I said wearily. "You're a strong warrior, and you don't give yourself enough credit. If you were truly evil, you would have lashed out at me again."

"You are trusting; foolish almost. A naïve attitude I once shared."

"We all have our demons to fight, Juhani." I shrugged at her. "I don't need you to be another one of mine."

"You struggle with the Dark Side also," she whispered. "I have sensed the anger and hate within you."

"Guess that makes us two of a kind then, huh?"

"No. You bested me, in my darkness."

"Stop it! You're stronger than this whining," I snapped.

"Strength... I suppose there is strength in resisting anger. The Dark Side of the Force is not what I thought." Her lilting voice had dropped to a mere whisper.

I eyed over the enigmatic Cathar in interest. She seemed to think little of herself at times, and yet I would also call her proud. An interesting contrast; maybe we did have more in common than she would admit.

"You mentioned killing your master in rage earlier. I assume you fled immediately after. I don't think you fell to the dark side as much as used it as an excuse for your own failure," I said flatly. Harsh words that resulted in the Cathar jerking her head up to meet mine, her eyes flashing with fury and hate. I smirked as I saw her eyes flick to her lightsaber held loosely in my hand.

"You think to judge me? You-" Juhani breathed in deeply as I tightened my grip on her weapon. The look on her face became cold, remote. "What would you presume to know of the Dark Side, human?"

I shrugged. _Like I can remember. _"I don't _presume_ to know anything, Cathar. It just strikes me that you were running, that's all."

"I failed them! I failed them all. What else could I do?" Desperation chased the lingering rage from her slanted yellow eyes.

"Learn from your mistakes?" I said sarcastically.

"Maybe. Maybe if I had the strength to take responsibility for my actions... the strength to resist my dark emotions. You have given me much to think upon, despite the callous tone of your words."

I scowled. "Callous or not, you will still teach me."

The Cathar inclined her head, but no emotion showed on her bloodied face. "I will repeat that I doubt I have much to teach you." She turned around to stared back at the looming walls of Anchorhead, and lowered her voice to a dusky whisper. "I do not wish to walk through crowds of strangers, looking like this. I never thought _I_ would fall victim to vanity."

I laughed in surprise. Juhani didn't seem the sort to be worried about her looks; but then her clothing _was_ matted with congealed blood. Her old robes hung limply in shreds over her body. The warrior's tale at the back of her head resembled the intestines of some disease-ridden animal. "You look like a tough Cathar warrior who's just seen and won a fight to the death." I had a vague memory of learning about the Cathar species. A warrior race. "Hah, I don't look too hot myself." If anything, I appeared worse off than Juhani. "We can always glare angrily at anyone who stares at us sideways."

Mission snickered behind me, but Juhani looked surprised. "You make jokes. You baffle me."

I grinned at the Cathar, and motioned her onwards. Zaalbar walked up to meet me.

"(Be careful, Jen. You may be a little too trusting of someone who almost succeeded in killing you.)"

"Don't worry, I'm not," I told him flatly. I was ready to flick Juhani's lightsaber on at the first sign of betrayal. But somehow I doubted the Cathar would turn on me again. Despite her fall, she seemed to exude honour, which I found odd in the extreme.

"Let's take the front entrance this time," I suggested as we closed in on the settlement. "Unless you guys want a Czerka bloodbath if the guards see us?" I was only half-joking. Some part of me was striving towards the thrill of the hunt, the pleasure of the kill. It had been surprising how easily we'd jumped the fence the first time around.

"Answer: Yes, please."

Zaalbar growled. "(Those Czerka goons may have it coming, but I do not think we are in any shape to provoke violence.)" I stared at Zaalbar in surprise at his out of character response. _He doesn't like Czerka, does he? I'll have to find out why._

We walked around the fortified walls of Anchorhead, towards the large metal doors that led into the town itself. I knocked sharply on them, and a slit opened in the middle. The eyes of a Czerka guard stared out.

"Who are you?" He demanded.

"Hunters," I responded. "You know, those people who head out to the dunes and kill stuff?"

"I don't recognize you. I didn't let you out," he said boldly.

"Guard here every waking hour, do you?" I snapped. "Let us in."

"Where's your hunting license?" he asked suspiciously.

_The Force, Bastila. Stop blocking me, or I swear I'll... _I trailed my mind thought off. I didn't quite want to threaten her just yet. Not when she could easily best me in a fight. Maybe, once I could fully harness my power, things would be different.

I felt her reluctantly slide back the mental shields blocking me. My thoughts drifted back to the other times I had used persuasion to get my way. _How had I done that? I feel like I'm fumbling around, trying to get things right without knowing how._

"I don't need a hunting license," I told the goon stolidly.

He scowled at me. "Everyone needs a hunting license, you idiot! You think Czerka lets just anybody walk the dunes?"

_Well, that didn't frelling work. _I embraced the pulsing power as it threaded through my veins, and tried again.

The Force extended outwards, and suddenly my senses went into overtime. I could feel the auras of nearby humans. Juhani's life-force next to me was a swirling morass of conflicting emotions, oozing Force energy. Mission and Zaalbar were much, much harder to see with my minds-eye. Slightly further away a hazy being pulsed. _Is that Bastila? _Three much darker, weaker bodies were closing in on what I assumed was the Jedi snot. _Huh? What is this? _I'd never sensed this sort of thing before. _Had I?_

"Look, are you going to rack off, or do you want things to turn ugly?" the Czerka thug rapped out, breaking into my confusion. The Force suddenly snapped back into my body, and the strange sensory feeling dissipated.

I scowled angrily. "I said, I don't need a hunting license." I fumbled with the power threading through my body, trying to force it into my words.

"Trying to be funny, are you?" the guard snapped angrily.

"This is ludicrous," Juhani said impatiently, shooting me a wary look. "Perhaps I understand why you need a teacher." She turned her attention to the metal slit on the Anchorhead gate. "We do not need a hunting license." The Force hummed weakly in her words, interleaving through the vibrations of the sound emitting from her.

"I guess you don't, uh, need, um..." the guard trailed off. "Uh, hang on!"

A faint blush rose through the dirt and blood on the Cathar's face. "I am afraid this sort of Force use was never my strong point, and I have been out of practice for some time."

I laughed loudly. Mission was guffawing behind us.

"I- just go away! I'm going to call the other guards out here!" the Czerka officer snarled.

"I think I know how this Force thing works," Mission piped up brightly, and skipped over to the guard. "Hey, open the door and let us in, and I'll give you two hundred credits." She hissed, slipping something through the slot in the wall.

The gates slid open.

A tendril of amused respect curled within me. _Why use the Force when you can use other means?_ Regardless, I had seen what Juhani had done, and felt confident of reproducing it.

"I guess we should work on this," Juhani murmured ruefully next to me as we followed Mission inside Anchorhead. _No, I can do this now, I know it!_

I stopped next to the wary guard, who was scowling at us all, his hand resting threateningly on his blaster. "You will forget about this incident," I said calmly, but the Force twisted away from my words, evading my grasp insidiously.

"Don't push your luck, missy!" the guard snarled, taking another step backwards.

"Jen, lets just go!" Mission tugged on my arm, but I yanked it away angrily. _I can do this, dammit! _

I breathed in deeply, gathering more Force energy and focusing on it. I eyed the guard over beadily as he edged away. "You want to go to the cantina. You will not remember meeting us." The Force interlinked through my words, its energy mixing with vibration, lending it more power and weight. _Yes, got it! This is an old trick I have used many times before._

There was an audible pause as the guard swallowed. "I'm gonna have a few drinks at the cantina," he mumbled.

"You will forget us." I reiterated confidently, lifting my head higher to stare deep into his squinting eyes.

"I- I'm just going to forget about this," he muttered.

Juhani blinked at me in surprise. "That was extraordinary, considering your earlier attempts. You must have done this before?"

"Probably," I muttered as the confused and sweating guard turned to move away. Juhani frowned at me in puzzlement.

"No one realizes how hard you work," I purred after the man, enjoying myself more as my confidence rose. _Pride has always been your downfall, _a shadowy voice whispered from the dark confines of my memory. I scowled.

"No one knows just how hard I work!" the guard exclaimed, tripping over himself as he scrambled away.

"You are merely playing now." Juhani stated, disapproval humming through her words. I glanced at her in startlement; criticism from someone who had just tried to murder me was not something I expected.

"Cool!" Mission breathed as she walked next to me. "I thought I was gonna crack up at the start, but you recovered pretty quick, Jen! Are you going to be a Jedi now? I guess that's how you beat Juhani, huh?"

The Cathar looked at Mission in askance. "She is strong in the Force. That does not make a Jedi, however."

"Yeah, no thanks. If it means having a snooty attitude like Bastila, I think I'll pass." I grinned at the Twi'lek as she giggled. Juhani shot me a reproving look, and I arched an eyebrow at her.

We walked into the dusty settlement as the light started fading. A merchant packing up his wares for the day had a bemused look on his face as he watched us saunter past. I guess we looked fairly strange; Mission was probably the most sprightly of us all. _Add HK into the bargain, and you've got one motley crew indeed._

I turned around to see the blood-red Tatooine sun head towards the horizon. A shimmer of sand floated up in the distance, and the dusty smell unique to this planet assailed my senses. _I've been here before. _No memories resurfaced, however, just the odd sense of déjà vu.

_Anger, hate, fear... _all these emotions seemed a part of me. But I cared for my companions. I felt an odd sense of empathy for Juhani. I liked to laugh at life. _I can't call myself Jen anymore. _Thankfully. _So who does that make me?_

"Jen?" Mission queried, and I realized I was still standing motionless, staring blankly at the metallic doors as they closed, shutting the endless desert off from my vision.

I smiled briefly at the girl. "Let's go. We'll find your brother tomorrow. I promise."

The vow slipped out before I could retract it.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - thanks, keep the reviews coming:grin:_

_Red Mage Neko - Read on :)_

_snackfiend101 - mwhahah gotta love those evil cliffhangars! Actually, I was going to post this chapter a day after, but it ended up growing larger on me. Meh. Thanks for the recommendation, by the way :)_

_Brynn - not sure Bastila would let anyone else train Jen :) However, that ain't gonna stop Jen trying..._

_Data & Feza - Yep, Jen sure is having trouble with the Force. Intuitively she can use it, but she can't really remember what to do. And she's being blocked as well_

_Gamorrean princess - Hi! Lol, loved your analogy :giggle:. I try to update regularly, but if theres a bit of a wait its usually because I'm working on multiple chapters, or I've hit a bit of a block. As to the penname, well.. heh, I usually go for the nick Ether, but fanfiction . net wouldn't allow it. I'm afraid I ran out of inspiration that day!_

_Lilina - lol you just gave me mental pictures of flying gizka...erk. British accents? You mean the female characters in the game? I suppose most of them do. Especially Dia, back in Taris._

_game-freak152 - thanks :) And I couldn't leave Juhani out._


	26. Half truths and part lies

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-six – Half-truths and part lies**

_- Bastila Shan -_

* * *

I couldn't stop the pacing, despite the ache in my feet. _Where is she? I must see her! _Had she reverted fully to Revan? I could only hope not, but the persona of Jen was well and truly gone. _She didn't kill Juhani, _a side of me argued. _Only so she could trick Force lessons out of her!_

And that realization had petrified me to the bone. _Revan, using the Force. Being taught by a runaway Padawan? _Whatever had happened to Juhani, I would help her return to the Jedi fold. She had been lost to the Enclave, and her reappearance stunned me. _The masters will surely be grateful for her return. But to think that Revan played a part in it..._

I could sense dark emotions pulsating through the bond. Her rage scared me more than anything else. But the humour... and it wasn't all dark, either. I thought I sensed odd flashes of compassion, also. _She does not remember. Part of her there is still Jen Sahara, perhaps? Or maybe part of her had never fully fallen? _I did not know the answers.

"Would you stop that infernal pacing?" Canderous growled nearby. We were standing outside the Ebon Hawk as daylight dimmed over Tatooine. Our day had been a success, until I had felt Revan's predicament and demanded we return back to Anchorhead. The rontos we hired were back at the merchant's stall, ready for us to pick up tomorrow. I had found the way to the Eastern Dune Sea, and we survived one encounter with the Sand People. The bulk of the ferocious natives lived directly to the south, but fortunately that direction was not our destination. I had cut off our progress sharply and headed back to the Ebon Hawk as soon as Revan had encountered Juhani.

Carth strode back towards us, having spent some time talking to the local mechanics.

"The Ebon Hawk should be repaired in another day. These mechanics are pretty quick moving, although I don't trust how thorough they will be."

_One more day until I can contact Coruscant. _The Jedi High Council resided on that planet, and I knew of some I would need to get in touch with immediately. _Master Karon, in particular. She was the main Jedi involved in Revan's mind rebuild. She may also know more about what happened on Dantooine._

_**The Force, Bastila. Stop blocking me, or I swear I'll...** _Revan's mind-thought swirled darkly through the bond, and I stiffened in reflex indignation. I was tempted to let her wander, Force-blind, but knew intuitively that course of action would only alienate her further from me. I would simply have to allow her to use the Force. I pulled back reluctantly.

Revan and I shared what was referred to as a mind-link, or bond. But that term was misleading, as in essence it was a Force link. _One created as Revan lay dying, before me._

As a Dark Jedi, her emotions had been irretrievably intertwined with the Force. While her soul cried in anguish, starting to separate from her body, her pain had radiated strongly through the Force.

I had been unable to simply walk away and let her die in the face of such anguish.

A spark of life had remained; a broken, tormented spark, but it was there nonetheless. I had struggled to sustain it, to fan it back into existence; and as I did so her ripples of agonized Force energy had flooded my own mind. Our respective grasps upon the Force had mingled in the most intimate fashion.

Eventually, I had pulled back into myself, lulling her into a healing coma. But by then, our connections to the Force had become irrevocably intertwined. I had not realized it then, but each of us was in a state of continual vulnerability to the other.

I sighed to myself, closing my eyes in fatigue. Never again could one of us open ourselves to the Force without also opening a window to the other. And there was the one advantage I truly held over her.

_Revan does not recall her training. _Unlike me, she did not yet know how to reach through that window. And unlike me, she did not know how to draw the shutters, so to speak. Whenever she pulled upon the power surrounding her, I was able to simply reach through that window and erect a mental barrier between her and the energy she was attempting to draw.

_At least she cannot decipher my thoughts. _My strength had always lain in the ability to interpret and manipulate emotions and mental patterns. To that end, I could understand the outer, stronger thoughts passing through Revan's mind, provided I was concentrating on the bond at the time. I could also push out my own mental voice to her, making us essentially telepathic. I grimaced in slight revulsion. _Telepathic with a Sith Lord. This is one gift I could readily forgo. _I could only hope that Revan would not learn how to decipher my own thoughts in return, or the cover would surely be blown.

"What's wrong now? You've got that funny look on your face." Carth was scowling at me again. "And you never told us why we had to return so suddenly. And why you were so panicked."

A movement up ahead caught my attention, and providentially gave me an excuse for not answering Carth's rather pointed queries. I saw three robed figures saunter into the docking bay. The last merchant still out selling his wares - despite the fading light - gave a squeak and scuttled away. The dark robes and ready walk of the strangers gave their identity away. _Dark Jedi? Here, on Tatooine?_

"Looks like we've got company," Canderous drawled next to me, his posture straightening. He almost sounded gleeful. Carth jerked his head around and pulled out his blaster.

The stranger in front walked closer, his face hidden by his cloak. I heard the faint noise of their lightsabers activating, red beams glowing ominously in the darkening surroundings.

I fervently wished I still had mine.

The leader laughed, stopping some distance away. "Lord Malak was most displeased when he learned you had escaped Taris alive! He has promised a great reward to whoever destroys you, and I'm not about to let that bounty hunter claim you first."

_Bounty hunter? _The only one I knew of was Calo Nord, but he had died back on Taris.

"Now this is a challenge!" Canderous crowed.

_Three force users, and me without a lightsaber. _There was only thing I could think of doing. "Use your vibroblades, both of you," I commanded the men. "I will aid you in the Force."

I reached out, drawing in the sweet taste as I enveloped both Carth and Canderous in a Force-activated shield. It had some ability to resist direct Force attacks, and I hoped it would be enough. Canderous grunted as he jumped passed me, and I inwardly thanked that he had not argued, for once.

Carth leapt towards the leader as Canderous faced the other two. Both of them appeared outclassed, and I further pulled on the Force surrounding me. One of the Dark Jedi laughed mockingly. _Battle Meditation. I need it now. _It had been some time, and I was more used to using it on a widespread scale rather than tightly focused on two individuals. But it would be stronger because of that.

My gift had the ability not only to restore morale, but also renew vigour and sharpen the co-ordination of those I concentrated upon. The smaller the range of recipients, the stronger my abilities. My eyes closed as I focused more tightly, and I hoped fervently that Carth and Canderous would stop any of the Dark Jedi from reaching me.

I felt the buffet of tainted Force power slam against the shield I had imposed upon Carth. _A dark poison mingled with push. _But my shield held, barely, and stopped it from reaching him. I opened my eyes to see a look of surprise on the leader's face, enough hesitation for Carth to run his blade fatally through the Dark Jedi.

Canderous grunted in pain as one of the others scored a hit. Carth yelled, and started running towards the fray.

"Sod this," Canderous grumbled, pulling out his large blaster and firing.

"No! Do not do it!" I screamed, but it was too late. With a sneer, the Dark Jedi reflected the bolts, and Canderous hollered as they burned into his armour. I unsheathed my vibroblade, and stopped my meditation.

"Block this, bitch," Canderous growled, and threw something towards the robed figure. The enemy raised a hand ready to push, but the object – no, thermal detonator – exploded in the air. A bright flash of light encompassed the hangar.

When my vision cleared, Canderous was standing over a corpse. The last remaining Dark Jedi had fallen to his knees in the blast, and struggled to his feet just as Carth struck him from behind. _Idiotic mercenary! _

"You are lucky you are not dead," I informed him coldly. "That Dark Jedi was about to push the grenade right back at you."

"Settle down, sweetcheeks, I do what the situation calls for," Canderous panted, as he crouched over the nearest corpse, looting it industriously.

"What did you just call me?" I hissed angrily, walking forward to relieve the body of it's lightsaber before the Mandalorian could pocket it. He smirked at me as I hastened to retrieve the other ones, but said no more.

I pocketed the two single sabers, and reactivated the double-bladed one experimentally. The blood-red hue of it highlighted on my face, but it was a rather well-designed weapon, despite what it had been used for. _The colour may be wrong, but this can tide me over until I receive a proper Jedi lightsaber. _Perhaps I could even reconstruct the colour crystals inside; it would be a shame to destroy a fine weapon such as this. It was light, sleek and smooth in its movements.

I snapped the weapon off when I saw Carth standing before me, his angry look passing through the whirling red light of the saber. I raised an eyebrow at his frustrated expression.

"Yes?"

"Dark Jedi, here on Tatooine. I'm surprised they realized you escaped Taris; even more astonished to discover they know we are here. And just when you have restarted this dangerous mission of the Council's. When are you going to tell us what's going on?" He had folded his arms in suspicion. I heard the Mandalorian snort in amusement behind us.

I stared at him indignantly. "Carth, I believe I have already explained it to you. We are searching for a Force relic that will aid the Republic in the war against Malak."

"Well, what does this relic do? And why did you get so panicky earlier and insist we go back to the Ebon Hawk? I hate being left out of the loop, Bastila!"

"You were born out of the loop, Onasi." A sardonically amused voice made me jump slightly in startlement, and the Republic captain whirl around in surprise. _I had not seen her coming._

"Cute, sister, but I-." Carth snapped back, and then stopped in mid-sentence as he fully took in her appearance. I gasped despite my own expectations. Revan was literally covered in dried blood; one arm hanging like a dead weight to the side, and numerous slashes gaping through her armour. She looked utterly exhausted, despite the smirk on her face. I lifted my dazed eyes past her to see Juhani, who looked in fairly the same condition.

Canderous laughed harshly from behind us. "Well, well, Jen. Looks like you had all the fun."

I eyed over the Cathar worryingly, and opened myself to the Force to sense her emotions. Confusion, guilt, fear, and an underlying sense of anger. She felt very similar to Revan, except for the glittering amusement that also radiated from my bond-mate.

"(A fine battle. A shame you weren't there.)" Revan shot a grin at Canderous. I could sense an overwhelming feeling of confused frustration emanating from Carth, and released the Force to concentrate on the conversation.

"(Sick of the act then, I take it?)" Canderous responded. I narrowed my eyes. _Revan hasn't spoken Mandalorian since the time I first met Canderous._ Another worrying indication, to be sure, but she seemed amused rather than anything else at the moment.

"Okay, can someone please explain to me, right now, what's going on?" Carth demanded loudly, his face a thundercloud. "Why are you guys smeared in blood? Who is _that?_" He added, pointing to Juhani who had taken a hesitant step backwards. "And why did you all leave the Ebon Hawk after promising not to, or shouldn't I even bother?"

"That is a valid point," I interjected smoothly, levelling a disapproving look both at Revan and Mission. "You swore to stay within the safe confines of the ship."

"Hey, you ain't my mother!" Mission protested, glaring angrily at me. "What I do is my own business, don't you try telling me any different!" Zaalbar laid a restraining hand on the upset Twi'lek's arm.

"Query: Permission to blast these whining meatbags, master? They appear to be threatening you."

A strange, metallic voice from behind Revan gave me yet another unwelcome surprise. She had a superior smirk on her face as an eerily evil looking robot walked up to stand beside her.

"What on Hoth is that?" Carth snapped.

"My latest toy," Revan almost seemed to purr. "HK, these are the rest of our little crew. Threaten them if you will, but do not physically harm them."

I was beginning to feel thoroughly annoyed with Revan, despite my fear of her. _Calm. This situation needs to be diffused. And I cannot forget Juhani, also. _The Cathar had retreated behind the large form of Zaalbar, and looked ready to bolt. I took a few steps towards her.

"Juhani. It is good to see you again, sister," I said softly as I reached her side. Her tormented eyes met mine briefly, and then looked away.

"Bastila," she responded quietly after a long pause. "It has been some time."

It had, indeed. I had not known the Cathar overly, but once we shared a difficult training mission with her rather eclectic Master. My respect for the intense Cathar had grown after that encounter, and I had been saddened to hear of her disappearance. I wondered briefly if the Masters had known about her fall to the Dark Side. I could only presume so; but that she had been brought in by Revan still stunned me. _It shows, then, that anyone can be saved from the path of evil. Revan herself still can. There is good in her, I am sure I have sensed it._

"Juhani, Jen, perhaps we should go inside? I believe you would both enjoy some time in the refresher to clean up, and then we need to talk."

Juhani nodded slowly, and seemed content enough to follow me into the Ebon Hawk. Revan herself gave me a rather bland cursory look, before ordering that odd droid into standby mode. _Wherever she obtained that robot from, I must see if I can get rid of it. _I'd only heard it speak once, but it was enough to convince me that all this HK could do was encourage the darker aspects of Revan's nature to emerge.

"So, care to explain to me why I should trust you?" Revan asked coldly as we entered the small office I had used earlier for meditation.

"Jen, I-"

"Hey, explain to me why I should even be here. I mean, you've only drugged me, lied to me, blocked me from the Force, and used some sort of compulsion on me at least once if not more. My memory's all screwed up, so I could be forgetting all sorts of sins you've committed against me."

"Don't be ridiculous," I snapped angrily. "If I wished to incapacitate you, I would have done so by now."

"Then why the lies? The sedative?" she asked flatly, her voice emotionless. Juhani was standing in the doorway, her eyes flicking between the both of us. I really would have preferred this conversation to have been away from the Cathar, considering how close she must still be to the Dark Side.

I sighed heavily, my anger draining away. _I need her trust._ "Yes, I admit I used rather unconventional methods to coerce you towards Dantooine. You are an extraordinary Force-sensitive, Jen, and I felt you needed to talk to the Masters as soon as possible."

"So you were trying to trap me?"

"No! Must you be so paranoid?" I frowned at her, breathing in deeply. "I was trying to get you to help, Jen. I have been worried about you. I can sense a lot of anger and rage from you, and this combined with your strong Force ability is enough to unnerve any seasoned Jedi. Dark emotions such as anger, hate and passion are a sure road to the Dark Side."

"Passion is a dark emotion?" Revan quirked an eyebrow at me, a grin curving her lips. Her lightening-quick mood changes still unnerved me.

"Yes, if uncontrolled. Jedi use peace of mind, serenity, calmness to handle the Force. If your emotions are unbalanced, then your ability with the Force becomes flawed; unpredictable and imbalanced."

She had narrowed her piercing green eyes at me. "But my strongest moments with the Force have been generally when I am at my angriest."

"Well, yes," I stuttered. _This is a conversation a Master should be leading, not me! _"Emotions can be used to fuel the Force, as it were. But this is a path fraught with danger, as the Dark Side works insidiously through irrational and illogical emotions, until it ends up controlling you. This is why we teach Force-users to clear their mind, to work through situations calmly and in control."

"Alright," she changed topics nimbly. "So why is my memory all screwed up then? Who am I really? Don't try to fob me off this time, Bastila, I'm not stupid."

I had been dreading this line of questioning for the last hour, and had spent the time attempting to think of believable answers she would accept. _Half-truths and part-lies... _but I needed her trust. More than anything else, however, I needed to make her aware of just how potentially dangerous and harmful the Dark Side could be. "You were once a Jedi, Jen. A young, powerful Jedi with a bright future ahead of you."

Surprisingly, her eyes softened somewhat. Juhani was staring at her in a new light, and I wondered exactly what the Cathar thought of her.

"What was my name?" Revan asked softly.

"Your mind was destroyed, Jen." I responded quickly, evasively. "I fear to tell you too much in case I do more damage. This is why you need to speak with-"

"Do more damage!" The vulnerable look vanished, to be replaced by the spike of anger that echoed through our bond. "I told you not to fob me off!" she growled.

"I am not! Listen to yourself!" I hissed angrily, fearfully. Did she scare me or anger me the most? I could not tell, anymore. "Your emotions take control of you all too easily! Your rage, your lust for battle, even your inconvenient humour! You are so open to the Force, with no recollection of your training, and yet you let your passions guide you!"

She had folded her arms stubbornly, glaring at me in fury. Juhani chose that moment to speak up in her quiet, distinct voice. "That is the path of the Dark Side, is it not? Allowing your feelings to overcome your better judgment..." The Cathar trailed off, looking away. I thought perhaps I caught a glint of tears in her eyes, but my attention was once more grabbed by Revan.

"So, what will you deign to tell me about myself, then?" she said sarcastically.

I breathed in deeply, and decided to overlook her childish comment this once. _I need to impress upon her the folly of the Dark Side. _And what was the best way to do that? The Revan I had known had always prided herself on her strength; I imagined Darth Revan had also. I had to keep the cover story as correct as possible, so it would ring true; but if I could make her believe the Dark Side was weak... I wished again Juhani was not listening. She perhaps knew more of the Dark Side than I did, or ever would. "As I said, Jen, you were a strong young Jedi." I paused slightly, bracing myself. "When Malak and his master left to fight in the Mandalorian wars, against the Council's orders, you followed them."

Revan blinked. "I did? I recalled something about the Mandalorian wars..." She trailed off, and glared at me suspiciously again.

I continued. "Along with many other Jedi, you fell to the Dark Side after the war was over."

Juhani gasped, and her eyes shot to Revan's face in surprise. Revan's expression, herself, had turned to stone. I ventured mentally into the bond, but couldn't sense anything. It was like she had also blocked her emotions behind an impassive shield. I had to finish my explanation, and hoped it would be enough. "You became a tool, Jen, a tool of the Sith Lord." I could not bring myself to name Revan. "You had once been a strong, capable Jedi, until you fell. Effectively, you became a slave to the Dark Side, a slave to the Dark Lord. You lost your own free will and strength of mind. Your power diminished over time, and you became weaker in the Force. Eventually you were involved in a confrontation with some of the Jedi."

"And then what?" the words hissed out, low and dangerous.

"Jedi do not kill, Jen. Your mind, however, was damaged irrevocably, irreparably."

"So who is Jen Sahara?" I barely heard the words.

"A part of you, as such." _Would she believe that?_ What her thoughts were about Jen Sahara, I could only hazard a guess at. "I do not know any more, Jen, and would not reveal it if I did," I lied smoothly. "You need the guidance and help of a Master; I am only a Padawan. I am willing to help retrain both you and Juhani, if you will let me."

Her eyes were glacial as she stared into mine. I could still sense nothing, absolutely nothing from the bond. The thought that she might be learning to block me, consciously or not, scared me further.

She nodded briefly. "Alright then. So explain this inconvenient mind-link to me."

_I should have thought up a plausible story for the bond. _But I had spent the time bracing myself for Revan's return, I had not enough time to conceive of possible answers to all her queries. _More partial truths. I act less like a Jedi the longer I am around this cursed woman_. "It grew upon the Endar Spire, an unexpected event. I do not understand why, perhaps a Master can explain it better to you."

Revan folded her arms belligerently. "Except that there is no Master around, is there? And I have no wish to meet one."

_You will, whether you desire it or not. _I just had to contact them first. "Like it or not, we are linked. Our connection allows us glimpses into each other's mind. We can feel some of what the other feels." I stopped to look over her briefly. An annoyed scowl still painted her face, and now I was beginning to sense flashes of frustration and anger pulsing through the bond. And fear, also. I seriously hoped I had made her fear the dangers of the Dark Side. "And what I feel within you troubles me. A Padawan must receive considerable training. They must learn to control their emotions and darker impulses. Often it takes years before using the Force can be considered safe. The fact that you are so strong in the Force and have had such relatively little training-"

"Okay, I get it!" she interrupted impatiently. A further swell of frustration crested within me, and I closed my eyes in irritation. _There is no emotion... _Was I getting through to her? _Patience. It will not be much longer. _Carth had said one more day until the communication system was back up; one more day in which hopefully I would locate and examine the Star Map. Then, provided the Force was with me, we could be on our way to Coruscant. And Revan could become someone else's problem for a time.

"I think I'm going to get cleaned up," Revan muttered, and I opened my eyes quickly to see her wincing as she stood. Her emotions had closed off from me again, and I wondered exactly what effect my revelations were having on her.

"No, wait," I commanded, and to my surprise she stopped. "Let me help." I drew on the Force, and sent it into Revan's body, delving through torn muscle and skin, reknitting it. Revan gasped, and stumbled back against the wall, shivering and flushing all at once as the Force healing swamped her. I frowned as I concentrated on her left shoulder and arm. _That is worse than I thought. _I was in the process of correcting it when she stopped me angrily.

"Don't do that again! Not without asking!" she snarled, clenching her teeth.

I blinked in surprise. "I am sorry," I said stiffly. "I was only trying to help."

"Yeah, well, the sentiment might be there, but it's a little rude to just go ahead and do that!" She glared petulantly at me, and then stalked out of the room. Juhani was motionless by the wall, looking at me uncertainly.

I sniffed irritably, then took note of Juhani's injuries. "Would you like to be healed, Juhani?"

She bowed her head. "It would make sense. Thank you, Bastila."

The Cathar said nothing as I laid a hand on her, and concentrated the Force through her damaged body. The electricity burns I had expected, but my teeth still gritted in reaction as I came across them. _Revan, transforming Force energy into lightening. That is bad, indeed. _I could still cut her off from the Force if needed, but was unwilling to push her anger too far. _She also broke through my shields twice when she was fighting Juhani. _The possibility that the one edge I had over her - my ability to manipulate our mind-link - could be weakened merely added to my own internal hesitancy and fear.

"Thank you," the Cathar gasped as I finished. She gave a slight shiver at the hot-cold reactions to the spiritual healing, but other than that there was no outward sign. Juhani's eyes flicked to the empty doorway that Revan had so soon departed.

"So she is like me, then," Juhani whispered. "I could sense the darker emotions in her, but I had thought she was simply a Jedi."

I drooped somewhat, sagging against the wall. "No." I looked at the Cathar, and did not know if I was up to dealing with her issues as well. _Here I am, attempting to guide two who have fallen to the Dark Side. One of them used to be a Sith Lord. _A bubble of almost hysterical laughter came to my lips, but I swallowed it back before it could escape. "Juhani, you are ready to come back to the Jedi? Are you willing?"

Her strange, feline eyes escaped mine, skittering away to focus in the shadows of the dimly lit room. She hesitated for a long moment, and then spoke softly. "I do not know, Bastila. I think- I think there is much I have to make up for. Jen forced me to look at myself, at my actions, and at my weaknesses."

I could not quite stop the small noise of surprise that erupted from my throat. _Revan? A voice of wisdom? _Obviously she had said something to turn the Cathar away from the darkness. _She had always been charismatic in the past... but still._

Juhani turned her head in response to my reaction at her words. A glitter of determination, or something similar, flashed through her face. "Perhaps she makes sense to me because she understands the Dark Side. Although from what you two were saying earlier, she has lost her memory?"

"Yes," I said shortly. I did not want to talk about Revan's history with Juhani, and disliked the implication that she was better at handling this sort of situation because she had once fallen herself. _That notion is simply preposterous. It is her fall which makes her weak, dangerous!_

I focused again on the bond linking me to Revan, but could sense no emotions from her whatsoever. It was like she had fully detached herself from the situation, it seemed as if she was watching from a distance, without taking it in. At that very moment, the emotional wall Revan had built around herself cracked and crumbled, and a powerful surge of fear, anger and misery cascaded through the mind-link. I staggered with the force of it, dazed.

Juhani's head jerked upwards, her eyes alert. "I can feel something... someone's pain," she murmured. "Jen?" The Cathar jumped to her feet and ran out of the room. That she had sensed Revan's distraught emotional state stunned me even further, and held me motionless for a moment.

"No, wait!" I demanded, following her speedily as common sense kicked back in. "I should be dealing with this situation! I have the training!" I dashed down the empty grey corridor of the Ebon Hawk, but Juhani was already ahead of me.

Panting, I reached the starboard bunkroom. Intense waves of rage and also confusion were still palpitating at me via the bond, and for the umpteenth time I wished I was not placed in this scenario. _But I am, and I will be strong and wise enough to deal with it. _I had once entertained the thought that my assignment upon the Endar Spire, and resultant guardianship of Revan, might be enough to prove I was worthy of being a Jedi Knight. If so, I was determined to show that I was, indeed, worthy of the honour.

Revan was curled up on the small bed, her dark curls clutched in clenched fists, with Juhani kneeling in front of her.

"We both fight it, do we not?" Juhani murmured as I cleared the doorway. "The Dark Side, and all of its inviting power, and freedom from moral obligations."

"I don't even know who I am." Revan's voice was harsh, guttural. "Why should I even bother to fight it?"

"No!" I cried out, appalled, running towards them instinctively. Both Juhani and Revan look up at my call, and the look on the latter's face was... twisted. Twisted with a whirling mass of conflicting emotions that echoed within our bond. "No," I said again, frightened, and knelt next to Juhani. Revan stared at me with startled green eyes, eyes that looked slightly darker than previously. Was I imagining it? Were her eyes, her soul, already changing for the worse? "Please, let me help you," I pleaded, reaching a hand out to her.

She blinked at me, and her pale white face suddenly became more vulnerable than before. The feelings through the bond dimmed, and as I opened myself to gauge her emotions, I could almost convince myself that I felt a glimmer of hope from her. Almost.

Revan looked away, and then back again, now eyeing me over in a considering fashion. "I guess it's time for our lessons then, huh?" she said flippantly, a forced smile pasted on her face. Juhani also looked at me, waiting. I nodded slowly.

"Yes. Let us begin."

* * *

xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Brynn: Yep, I can't see Jen feeling entirely happy with Bastila for awhile either. Not sure when the next Zaalbar chapter will be, but here's Basi. Your idea of a personality fight et al might work on Korriban? Nice dark planet to play with Jen's anger..._

_Lord Valentai - Mwhaha...no, actually, I'd rather not imagine being linked to Bastila :grin:_

_Data - Yeah, I know what you're saying. Even I'm getting annoyed with Bastila :grin:. You're quite right in that Bastila wouldn't normally be strong enough to do that, but they are both in a state of heightened vulnerability to the other due to the mind-link. It's a two-way thing - i.e. Jen could theoretically do the same back to Bastila, if only she knew how. Anyway, hope the following explains things a bit more._

_snackfiend101 - Why, thank you :)_

_Dark Lord Daishi - heheh, thanks :)_

_Feza - What's Bastila going to say? Heh, title of the chapter says it all. I haven't actually made up my mind about what to do with Belaya - DS or not. What do you think? I envisaged Juhani as having fled from Dantooine about a year previously. _

_game-freak152 - Hopefully the following should explain it :)_

_Red Mage Neko - You know, originally I wanted Jen and Bastila to get along. That is **so** not happening... they just seem to be disliking and angering each other more and more..._


	27. Into the dunes

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

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**Chapter Twenty-Seven – Into the dunes**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

I sat down slowly on the bottom bunk, my muscles screaming in protest at the movement. The healing Bastila had forced on me certainly helped, no matter how intrusive it was. However, the thought of kolto or even bacta patches to finish the job was becoming more and more desirable. 

I felt like Bastila had walloped me over the head. Her revelations and explanations just confused me all the more. _She said I'd been a Jedi. _Well, that was probably true. Both Evil Bitch and Street Kid must have had training from somewhere. So which one had been the Jedi?

At least it didn't take a genius to work out which one had fallen to the Dark Side.

I sighed heavily, dragging my knees up to rest my chin on them. A dull throbbing through my partially healed shoulder petered into my consciousness, and I wondered why I had reacted so strongly when Bastila had healed me. _She meant well, and she made me feel a whole lot better. _And yet, the feeling of someone intruding into **my **body, without **my** permission, whirled up the earlier fury I'd thought I'd taken care of. _She had no right! No one touches me!_

Our little Force session earlier had annoyed me more than anything else. Bastila, it seemed, wished to take things very slowly indeed. Considering Juhani had until recently been a psychopathic murdering plague upon the dunes, I suppose I couldn't blame her, but impatience was setting in regardless. _I understood that blasted Code the first time she said it. _Why Bastila thought repeating it a hundred times to us both would help, I had no idea. _There is no bloody emotion, or there won't be after I throttle her. _

Well, satisfaction was probably classed as an emotion.

I scowled, and dragged my mind away from that rather fruitless Force lesson. I needed time to examine all the aspects of what Bastila had imparted to me. _Can I trust what she said?_ To be sure, some of it made perfect sense. I hastily rifled through the earlier flashbacks I'd had on Taris. _One mentioned the Mandalorian wars, and some council treating me like a child after returning. _I frowned in thought, flicking over that memory as best I could. Unfortunately, it had already started to fade, to edge away from my awareness. _And I still have no idea who that boy was..._

Not to forget that Bastila certainly wasn't telling me everything. _She even evaded telling me my own name. I can't keep calling myself Street Kid or Evil Bitch. And she didn't explain Jen Sahara. Nor did she disclose why I have three different people in my head, and for all her protestations of ignorance about my situation, I don't quite believe her. _At least I knew Jen Sahara wasn't the real me. If only I could narrow it down further.

_Why am I even bothering? _I sighed again, and lay down slowly, gingerly moving away from my torn shoulder. _I'd be stupid to trust any word that wormed its way out of the snot's mouth. Perhaps Juhani would be more help. _I particularly wished to speak to the Cathar in private. _She owes me Force lessons herself. And she may have some notion on how to combat Bastila's hold over my ability to use the Force. _Bastila, however, had other ideas, and seemed to be ensuring Juhani and I were never alone together.

I scowled, focusing on Bastila through the bond. I knew she was still preaching to Juhani, and she felt relatively calm in the mind-link. It almost seemed a fake veneer, though, I sometimes thought I could taste flashes of fear and panic from her.

_And as for the bond... _Somehow, I had to stop Bastila from having the ability to cut off my Force power. As soon as I'd seen her outside the Ebon Hawk, I'd struggled and striven to feel absolutely nothing, to keep all my emotions under an imaginary shield of indifference. _If nothing else, I don't want that woman having access to my mind. _It had seemed to work; I was beginning to sense when Bastila was attempting to probe the mind-link for my emotions and thoughts, and I'd allowed her to feel nothing but a detached numbness.

_Until I broke down. _I closed my eyes in slightly embarrassed, but mostly frustrated recollection. _Hey, it could have been worse. I could have started bawling in front of Canderous. _I snickered as I imagined the derisive look that would have appeared on the rugged face of the Mandalorian brute.

_Stop evading the issue. I lost control. That was weak. Pathetic. _I dragged a blanket over myself half-heartedly. _Weak and pathetic? Like the Dark Side is? _That didn't fit, somehow. Bastila assured me I'd turned into a mindless tool of Revan and Malak. _Me? An empty slave? _Maybe that was where Jen Sahara fit in. _I am no one's slave! The Dark Side has the real strength! _What was the stronger, the Dark Side or the resistance of such? _If only I knew Bastila's agenda, then I would have a better understanding on whether she was honest. _Jedi did not lie, except that Bastila already had. _She is nothing. She tries to make me doubt my own self! _Except I was already doing that before she came along.

I sighed angrily, and decided that maybe it was time to get some well deserved rest. _Let's try some of those simple meditative techniques Bastila was cramming down my throat then._

I cleared my mind after a struggle, and slowly fell into an uneasy sleep.

…

_An older Zabrakian woman stood before me, frowning. She was dressed in loose fitting tan robes, holding a cyan coloured lightsaber pointed at me._

_Her stance was ready, waiting; but she did not appear in the least bit threatened or anxious._

…

The vision spiraled away into dust as I struggled to hold onto it, in a drowsy state of semi-wakefulness. _Who was the Zabrak? She looked like a Jedi? _Fatigue overcame me, and I once more drifted off into a restless slumber.

…

"_It's in here somewhere. I can feel it," I whispered ominously as I took another step into the darkness. The air smelled damp and rancid; probably a natural odour in a Krayt dragon's habitat._

"_Better be. Only for you would I traipse through this godforsaken desert." The words husked past my ears as I felt hands trail over my robed arms from behind. I could almost see him grin cockily as he pushed aside my hood to kiss my neck. "Only for you would I face dragons."_

_I turned in his arms, shivering despite myself. I may have lost everyone back on Talshion, but at least I still had him._

_He ran a hand gently along the side of my face. His eyes, so dark and familiar, were burning. I smiled slightly as he lowered his face to mine._

"_You smell of krayt blood," he murmured softly against my lips._

"_And you are distracting me." I pushed him away despite myself. _Discipline. I am in control of myself. _But hadn't I already forsaken those teachings?_

"_Fine," he grumbled. "Lead on then."_

_I grinned, and walked further into the musty, dark cave. Bones and rotting carcasses lined the cavern walls, but my goal was further ahead. A dark, cloying presence swirled in the Force. _This is it, then. This is my next step towards power. _Power enough to save the Republic from any dire threats like the Mandalorians had been, since the Council had refused to do anything._

_I could see some sort of metallic object up ahead. _The Star Map.

"_Well, well. Only our fourteenth cave, and finally we hit the jackpot." His sardonic tone couldn't swamp down my excitement as I investigated the old Rakata relic, crouching down and activating it._

_The Map opened, creaking from disuse, and a sharp blue light spiked into my vision. I squinted as the ancient navigational map unfolded in front of us._

…

"_I am loyal! I swear it!" The woman gasped as I lifted her in the Force, slamming her hard against the wall behind._

"_Tell me who betrayed me," I snarled viciously, my rage fuelling the Force thrumming and pulsing through my body._

"_I do not know! I wasn't part of it!"_

_I could hear the sincerity in her tone. She was of no use to me then, and I was not in the mood to be sparing. I squeezed my fist, and her neck yanked to the side. And audible snap sounded through the room. _Now that was a waste. That sort of carelessness is more often displayed by my apprentice, _I berated myself ruefully as I exited the room, stepping over the twitching body. _My apprentice... _No, he couldn't be the one who betrayed me. Not him._

_I walked further, well aware a trap was waiting for me, but my pride would not allow for anything else but to show I was the strongest. _No one can best me. No one ever has, and once again, it looks like I have to prove it.

_A large chrome door opened ahead of me. _Of course, they are expecting me. _I had been lured onto this pathetic hovel of a planet merely to be led into an ambush, organized by Deralian troops and some of my own traitorous Dark Jedi. _I will lay waste to this festering planet.

But first, the matter of this scum up ahead. I will show them what happens to those who dare to betray me!

_I stood still in the doorway, aware that the light from the room behind was illuminating my presence like a homing beacon, but perversely I wanted them to make the first, futile move._

_I could sense perhaps ten or so Dark Jedi in the room. The blood of Deralian troops still splattered my robes; yet I was more than ready to add to it. _Who organized this? Which pathetic minion dared to believe they could challenge me?

_The one nearest snarled, and charged._

…

My vision dimmed, disappeared somehow, but I could still sense the figure. The hand on my shoulder felt weak, almost as though it was shaking me.

My own hand stretched out and grabbed the offender's throat, a growl erupting from mine as I squeezed.

"Jen! Le-let go!" A high-pitched girl's scream. _What? _I dropped my hand abruptly, and opened my eyes. I heard a faint coughing sound, and alarm sounded through me. _Did I just try to kill Mission?_ Harsh light from a fluorescent tube flared through the room as Mission flicked the lamp on.

"Geez, Jen, what were you trying to do? Murder me?" Mission spluttered in a shadowed corner of the room.

"Are you okay?" I gasped. I was standing without realizing it. "Damn, I'm sorry. I was having some sort of nightmare." The vision still swirled in my head. I was surrounded by Force-using bastards about to kill me. _What had happened next?_

"No kidding." Her voice was dry, but she was grinning impishly. Obviously, I had not hurt her overly. _Good._ "Remind me not to wake you up again, Jen. Sheesh, I thought I was gonna be Jawa juice there for a minute."

"I'm sorry. Really sorry. I was dreaming someone was going to attack me," I said sincerely. I didn't want to hurt the girl.

Mission giggled suddenly. "You weren't dreaming about Bastila, where you? I bet she was pretty mad, huh?"

"Well, you know Bastila," I commented wryly.

The Twi'lek rolled her eyes, her lekku flicking derogatively. I'd never totally been able to speak the full depth of Twi'leki, which required a set of headtails to emphasize certain points and subtleties. I knew enough to pick up on some of the nuances, though, and Mission seemed to incorporate it instinctively as she spoke Basic.

"What are you doing awake now, anyway?" I queried. "It must be the middle of the night."

"It's almost dawn. Time for us to leave, I thought."

I frowned. _She wants to go Griff hunting again. _Well, that suited me. The dark images swirling through my head roused my lust for some healthy violence. _I must control those urges. I almost injured Mission. _The Twi'lek girl had her uses, it would be a waste to kill her. _I don't want to kill her! She is my friend! _It was a weakness to care for people. _She is no one to me. She is merely a useful tool._

"How do you plan to leave Anchorhead this time?" I asked her softly, as I probed gently into the mind-link. Bastila was asleep, but also seemed disturbed, restless. _Worried and afraid, almost. I wonder if my dreams had an affect on her. _As I thought back on the flickering recollections that daunted me throughout the night, I could almost recall a foreign presence, looking in on my mind.

I stiffened in outrage. _No. It's impossible. There is no way Bastila could be sharing my dreams. I'd rather jump into a sarlaac pit!_

If I was correct, then this bond was getting far too powerful.

"What we did last time, I guess," the girl chirped. "I've got you some new armour, and Big Z's gathered up some supplies. He took a lot of convincing, though, keeps harping on about wanting Bastila with us."

"No, thanks," I said shortly.

Mission giggled. "You and me both. Anyway, we're all set to head out."

"Yep," I said confidently. _But there's a risk with jumping the Anchorhead gates. Why not chose an easier option? _I smiled slowly to myself. "But I've got a better idea, my friend."

Mission's eyes brightened as she saw the look on my face. "What?"

"Well, Bastila's already been out of Anchorhead, right? I bet she got a hunting license from Czerka. Now that the guards know her, she doesn't need it anymore."

"I doubt she'll just give it to us!" Mission protested.

I laughed. "That's where you and your awfully clever stealth belt come in."

Mission guffawed, and then covered her mouth with a hand. "You want me to steal from a Jedi?"

"Think you're up to it?" I grinned.

"Well," Mission beamed impishly at me. "She's asleep now, right? I'm pretty quiet, and it's certainly a challenge," she giggled. "She'll have kath pups if she catches me!"

I sniggered, and then another thought hit me. I'd seen the bodies of what looked like Dark Jedi outside the Ebon Hawk when we had returned. I'd also noticed Bastila attempting to hide a small collection of lightsabers from my eyes. I was still holding on to Juhani's, but I fought better with two. "While you're there, Mission, see if you can nab one of the single bladed sabers Bastila's got."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "You want me to nick her lightsaber? Geez, Jen, that's just asking for trouble, y'know."

I shrugged. _I shouldn't be forcing the girl into trouble. She trusts me. _I pushed that thought away ruthlessly. _I will use whoever I must to achieve my goal. Besides, I am helping her find her brother. _The bloodshed that would go along with this quest into the desert also whetted my appetite. "If you see it, I'd appreciate it Mission. I fight better with two sabers, and Bastila picked up a handful of them today."

"I'll see what I can do." The Twi'lek gave me a confident grin, and stood, sauntering out of the room.

As Mission left me in solitude, I drew my thoughts back on the dreams I had just woken from. Only Evil Bitch could be psychotic enough for the last one. But that odd vision about some sort of brightly glowing artifact... _it looked like some sort of navigational map. _Who was I there? It was hard to tell. _That boy was in it. No, he must have been a man, then. I cared for him. I could feel it. _That meant it was Street Kid. Odd, she had seemed a trifle harder, colder, than before.

_Not when compared to my other half, however. _I skimmed through the final vision again, and shuddered at the memory of the person I had killed. _Why? Why murder someone who was no threat? _And I'd been confident enough, or merely crazy enough, to walk straight into a trap I knew was coming.

It hit me then, fully. _I was powerful. Powerful enough to have people following me. _Perhaps not that many, but the woman I had killed had sworn loyalty. _Bastila told me I'd turned weak and spineless when I embraced the Dark Side. _My eyes narrowed.

_She lied._

_Evil Bitch might be psychotic, unbalanced, and utterly deluded, but she wasn't weak._

_It's time to split. Time to disappear. Any longer around that Jedi bitch and I'm just begging for her to walk me straight into a trap._

I knew she wanted to lead me towards some of her all-powerful masters._ Maybe, one day when I had regained my Force ability, I might just take her up on that._

But, seeing as I promised to help Mission find her brother, I'd do that first. _The desert is a wonderful place to vanish in. _It would be a shame not to spend any time learning from Juhani, but it was more important to put some distance between me and that Jedi snot.

A noise from the doorway made me look up suspiciously, but nothing was there. I narrowed my eyes, seeing a slight wave in my vision. _Stealth field generator?_

"Mission?"

A click, and the Twi'lek reappeared. She was beaming, and I saw a metallic rod clasped in one hand. I smiled slowly.

"Easy!" She grinned, coming to flop on the bed next to me. She thrust a deactivated lightsaber and a plastic card into my possession. I squinted at the card, and made out the words 'Czerka Permit'. So, the girl had succeeded.

"Let's depart."

xXx

I belted on the used combat suit Mission had retrieved for me, flexing my shoulder irritably. The armour was another standard issue, lightweight suit like I'd used back on Taris, but plating was missing from the left arm. _No problem. I'll just make sure I don't get hit there then._

Zaalbar was staring at me worriedly as we waited for Mission.

"I'm fine, Zaalbar," I told him ruefully before he could ask. The Wookiee merely shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm glad you're back to normal, Jen," Mission said from the doorways. "I still can't believe you can use the Force. Wow, that was impressive against Juhani. Kinda scary, though! What's it like?"

I blinked at the young enthusiasm of the girl. "Well, it's pretty overpowering. The sheer force of it can wipe out your rational thoughts, and you can end up being controlled by your baser emotions." _I guess that's why Bastila keeps harping on so much. I was so close to killing Juhani. _I scowled to myself. _I do what I like. No snooty Padawan will tell me otherwise._

"Y'know, you have been a wee bit more grumpy, though," Mission commented.

"I didn't exactly have the best of days yesterday," I pointed out.

Mission looked down. "You- you kinda looked like you were losing control. I mean, when you were playing with that lightning. I, uh, I thought you were gonna kill Juhani back then," she said timidly.

"I almost did. Don't forget, Mission, she tried to kill me," I responded a trifle coldly.

"Yeah, I suppose," Mission said, and I stood up to exit the ship.

"Going somewhere?" a voice rapped out sarcastically as I jumped off the landing platform.

"Onasi." I smirked. "Guess you warheros don't bother with sleep."

The faint light of pre-dawn illuminated the scowl on his face. "Must be a trick I'm learning from you, Jen. I can't believe you're all sneaking off again! After what happened yesterday!"

Mission's lekku had fallen flat against her head, as she stared him down. "We're just going for a walk, that's all! Geez, why's everyone on my tail all of a sudden?"

"Statement: Paranoid Has-Been is in target range," HK-47 pointed out matter-of-factly, clattering down the ramp.

"You're taking him, too?" Carth snapped, glaring at the robot. "What are you trying to do, give Bastila a heart attack?"

I sniggered despite myself. "Hey, if she wants to get all worked up, let her."

"Fine." He folded his arms in his typical stubborn way. "If you lot are simply going for _a walk_, then I might just tag along."

"Y'know, Big Z's already bad enough with all this smothering. You and Bastila really don't have to bother," Mission objected.

"I don't see him stopping you," Carth said flatly.

"(This is a matter of family! Of honour!)" Zaalbar growled loudly behind us.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. If we kept bickering, Bastila was certainly going to wake up, and then the fun would really begin. "Let's just go before the sun sets," I muttered sarcastically, striding towards the Anchorhead gates. I noted dispassionately that the Dark Jedi corpses had been cleared away. I wondered what good Samaritan had done that. _Probably the Jawas sold them as bantha fodder._

"(The sun has not yet risen, Jen Sahara. In fact, one could say it is still set,)" Zaalbar informed me helpfully. _He has to take everything so literally, doesn't he?_

"So, Mission, I hope you know the way. Besides dead south, I mean," I commented as the girl dashed up next to me.

"More or less," she said brightly. "The guys in the cantina said it was under a days walk, but I scoped out some speeders we could nick to make it quicker."

"Say what? A day's walk south? Stealing speeders?" Carth's voice had risen to an almost convincing imitation of Bastila. _He's not going to stop complaining until someone tells him what's going on._

"Suggestion: Paranoid Has-Been could use a memory upgrade. Or a blaster shot to the head. Query: May I administer the latter to him, master?"

"Here's the deal, flyboy." I whirled around, facing him coldly and ignoring HK. He was staring at me incredulously, a mixture of alarm and suspicion on his face. I realized then that I did not like having him around. _He unnerves me. I don't know where I stand with him, and I don't like it. _"Mission's brother is being held captive by the Sand People. We're the rescue team."

"Br-brother?" he stammered, looking over at Mission. His expression softened. "Mission, why didn't you say so? I mean, uh, after Taris..." he trailed off, and Mission looked away.

"I ain't looking for sympathy, okay? I just want to find my brother," she said softly.

Carth nodded, his face compassionate as he stared at the girl. "I- fair enough, Mission. I can understand. But surely we should get the others to help?"

I snorted. "Bastila doesn't want either me or Mission outside of the Ebon Hawk."

"That's because you're certifiably insane, Jen," Carth fired at me.

"I bet you say that to all the ladies," I purred, and smirked when I saw I had discomfited him.

"So, you in or not, Carth?" Mission asked. "'Cause we really should get going."

"I'll come. It's not like Bastila really needs my help in her little quest, and I have a funny feeling you lot are just going to get into trouble."

I laughed. "Such faith," I mocked. "What quest are you talking about, anyway?"

I could feel Carth's frown on my back as I headed into Anchorhead, following Mission.

"I'm not sure, she's pretty tight-lipped about the whole thing. Isn't it what you were hired for in the first place, Jen?"

_Ruins. She's looking for ruins on Tatooine? _That seemed weird. The only thing on this planet was sand and annoying primitives as far as I could see. _But that was Jen's original mission. So there was some truth in it after all? _I wished I understood exactly what part Jen Sahara played in all of this.

"So, want to nick some speeders Jen?" Mission asked.

"Nah, let's play it safe." Alright, I really didn't want to drive anything even remotely like a swoop bike after Taris. "Besides, I don't think HK would be comfortable on one."

"Objection: Master, I am-"

"Shut up, HK."

Mission snickered at me, and I noted Carth trying to hide a smirk. I carried on towards the large gates of Anchorhead, where a sleepy guard snapped to attention as we neared. I showed him our license, ignored Carth's questioning glance, and strode on into the dunes.

A glint upon the horizon indicated that sunlight was about to break, and I could see a dark shimmer up ahead. _Some sort of sandcrawler, no doubt. A Czerka mining mission?_

We headed off in silence towards the distant sandcrawler until I felt a drowsy stirring within the bond. "Dammit, Bastila's waking," I muttered.

"Eh?" Mission had obviously caught that. "Why d'ya say that?"

I eyed over the eager Twi'lek as she walked next to me, and wondered whether I should explain things to her. _What the heck. _"We have a mind-link, Mission. Don't ask me how it happened, for I have no idea and Bastila certainly hasn't enlightened me." No, she fobbed me off on that question just as she did when I asked about my fragmented memory. _"It just happened", my fat arse._

"Huh?" Mission blinked at me in confusion. "A mind-link? What's that?"

"Some Force thing. We can, sort of, sense each others emotions. Oh, and she can yell inside my head at times. Makes my life really enjoyable," I muttered darkly.

Mission wrinkled her nose at me. "I knew it! That must be how she made you act all stupid before!"

"Come on, Jen, you can't seriously expected us to believe that," Carth interrupted derisively, but then paused. "Although Bastila was acting pretty weird yesterday, come to think of it."

"(This is some sort of honour bond you share with her?)" Zaalbar queried.

"Sheesh, Carth, why d'ya always believe the worst of Jen? Anyone with eyes could see that Bastila was doing some sort of Force thing on her." Mission turned to look at me speculatively. "Though I guess now that you can use the Force, she won't be able to, right?"

"Use the Force? Jen?" Carth spluttered. "What have you been eating, Mission?"

_If he doesn't believe me, I could always show him. _My fingers twitched. _No, it would alert Bastila. Play nice._

"You're such a brainless nerf-herder, Carth! How d'ya think Jen and that cat woman got so beaten up, huh?"

"I assumed it was by-"

"Drop it," I said flatly. "Trouble ahead."

Smoke was pouring from the Sandcrawler, more obvious now that we neared it. I could see flashes of blaster fire glint in the distance, and small specks indicating the beings involved. I squinted.

Mission pulled out some sort of modified visor, and clipped it on. I looked at her in surprise.

"Where did you get that?" I was fairly certain I hadn't seen that on her before.

"I just found it lying around," she evaded. I sniggered.

"(I tried to stop her,)" Zaalbar grumbled. _I guess she went for a "wander" last night. _Mission fiddled around briefly with the controls on the goggles.

"Humans being swamped by some sort of robed creature," Mission muttered distantly. "I guess they're probably Sand People, right?"

"Statement: I am ready for action, master," HK said gleefully.

"I just bet you are," I muttered.

"(We should avoid that conflict,)" Zaalbar rumbled.

"Yeah, I'm with Big Z." Mission was still tweaking her visor. "It looks pretty nasty. I reckon those humans are gonna be toast."

"We can't just leave them to die, though. Not if we can help them," Carth objected.

_Looks like I'm the deciding vote. _I smirked. _Bloodshed it is. _"Let's go give them a hand, then. Zaalbar, you and me take the front lines? Just like old times in the sewers, eh?"

"(Do not remind me, Jen Sahara. I did not enjoy the sewers.)" Zaalbar paused, unsheathing a vibroblade. He turned to look at me then, obviously wondering if he had caused offence. "(But you are a good fighter.)"

I grinned at the Wookiee, and pulled out my lightsabers. "HK, don't kill any humans, alright? They might be grateful for the rescue." _And who knows what I could pull from them. Credits, information._

"Where did you get those?" Carth hissed, grabbing my arm. I yanked it away from him, and activated one threateningly.

"I thought I told you not to touch me, Onasi," I sneered. _Odd. It didn't bother me so much this time. But he shouldn't be pulling me about the place anyway._

His eyes had turned cold as he stared at me. "You are _not_ playing at being a Jedi. You really will get yourself killed."

My humour returned, and I grinned at him. "That'll put a load off your mind and Bastila's, I'm sure. Tell you what, if you can catch me before I reach the Sand People, I'll give you the sabers," I challenged recklessly, and turned to run towards the oncoming conflict.

"Jen!" he yelled out, and I opened myself to the Force. _Speed. Come on, girl, I've done it before. _The buzz tickled through me, a feeling that was becoming more and more natural.

**_Jen? Jen?! Why are you using the Force? _**Damn, she's awake.

_Shut up, Bastila. Life in danger. Shush._

_**What? Where are you? You haven't gone again?!**_

_I'll be back in an hour! _Nothing like lying to the enemy. I pushed the bond to the back of my mind, concentrating on the battle ahead. The world stretched around me, as for once the Force did what I wanted. _It's becoming easier. More familiar, too. My old instincts are returning, I'm sure. _

The mass of hostile Sand People were busily decimating the ill equipped humans, and I ran straight towards the middle of the fray. I heard Zaalbar howl in objection at my actions behind me, but ignored him as I cut down the first primitive.

Angry challenging hoots surrounded me, and the Sand People turned to take me on. I dodged their blows, striking them down with my dual lightsabers as the Force pulsated through my veins. My very co-ordination and awareness seemed heightened merely by holding that sweet power, and I felt like I could predict the move of every hostile that attacked me.

Zaalbar, growling, impaled one of the natives on my flank. I heard the buzzing noise of blaster fire come from behind me as the others opened fire.

The heat of battle hummed through me, mingling with the Force. Sweat dripped down the sides of my face as I yelled in battle rage, dodging the primitive gaffi sticks the Sand People flung my way. Mission had thrown us each an energy shield earlier, but I deigned to activate it.

The last group of five Sand People turned their backs on the humans, and attacked simultaneously. My hand rose and I pushed the Force out instinctively. They flew backwards onto the sand, and Zaalbar jumped forward to stab one through. The others scrambled to their feet, and with protesting grunts, turned and fled.

The few humans surviving after the battle looked at me wearily. I saw Carth walk over to join me.

"You should be locked in an institution," he muttered. "Though I saw what you did. No wonder you got past that Sith guard back on Taris. And the rancor!" His eyes were dark with suspicion. "Is that why Bastila locked you up last night? She's teaching you the Force? Isn't that all a little odd?"

I shrugged noncommittally at him. "Beats me, Onasi. I thought she was just trying to make my life miserable."

A smirk curved his lips before he quickly replaced it with a scowl. "I thought it took years of study to even use the Force. How is it possible that you, a scholar _supposedly,_ can suddenly use it so expertly?"

"I'd hardly call myself an expert," I muttered. "As to how, why don't you ask Bastila? You might get more answers out of her than I do."

Carth folded his arms, a puzzled expression on his face. "You make it sound as if she's hiding something from you."

"Hell, flyboy, she's hiding things from everyone." _I don't have time for this. _But I supposed he deserved an explanation. _Like he'd believe what I said anyway. Not that I care what he thinks._

"Thanks for your help!" one of the humans gasped as he approached me, eyeing me over in a mixture of gratitude and wariness. I snapped off my lightsabers, and attached them to my belt. "I hope there's no more of those animals out there."

"What are you lot doing here anyway?" I questioned the man. He was middle-aged, with a desperate expression clouding his eyes. I spotted several human corpses lying next to the Sandcrawler and realized he had lost a lot of troops already. "You don't look like fighters," I said bluntly, eyeing him over. He appeared relatively muscular, but was only wearing a light, loose-fitting armour. A standard issue blaster pistol was clutched in his hand.

"We're not," the man rapped out. "We're a group of miners, working for Czerka. I don't think we'll try holding this position for much longer."

"No, not unless you get some backup," I said dryly.

"Hey, do you know a Twi'lek called Griff?" Mission piped up hopefully as she neared us. The human eyed her over, and shook his head irritably.

"Never heard of him."

"Oh." Mission's lekku fell flat against her face, conveying disappointment. "He's also a miner, but apparently the Sand People took him in a raid," her voice trailed off in despair.

"They should all be wiped out. Every last one of them," the man snarled suddenly. "They attacked without any reason! Dozens of them! We're not soldiers, and we lost so many men."

"I'm surprised Czerka didn't outfit you better," Carth interrupted. "It's a disgrace, if they knew about the threat of these Sand People."

"They tried," the human said tersely. "The company did arm us, and even set up remote self-powered turrets on the mining route, but...but that just made things worse."

"Worse? How so?" I questioned.

"The Sand People took all the Czerka weapons that were supposed to protect our sandcrawlers. I hear they've even set them up around their closest enclave, directly to the south. That's why it's so hard to wipe this scum out. Their base is a fortress, a death trap."

My eyes narrowed. "Wonderful," I said dryly. "It's going to be fun getting in then."

"You're headed that way?" the miner asked in surprise. "Take my advice, and don't go there. You won't have a chance. I- I suppose the only way to avoid the turrets is to sneak in somehow."

"Sneak in?" My eyes flicked to Mission, and she stared at me hopefully.

"The Sand People attack any outsiders they come across," the man told me. "I still think you're mad if you go ahead, but hey, it's your life. I'm getting out of here before they come back." He turned around to face the straggling remains of his men. "Come on, let's head back."

"What about the sandcrawler, captain?" one of the survivors questioned.

"There's no point repairing it just to get attacked again. May as well leave it for the Jawas to salvage."

The disheartened and injured miners left us slowly, trudging wearily back to Anchorhead. Corpses of Sand People and humans alike littered the desert floor, and I stared at them slowly, an idea whirling around in my mind.

"(I do not know if we should proceed. It sounds like certain death,)" Zaalbar rumbled in discontent.

"I'm going!" Mission folder her arms stubbornly, glaring at Zaalbar. "You wouldn't leave me out here, would you Big Z?"

"(I would not forsake you Mission. But we need a better plan.)"

"The only way to sneak in would be to dress up as Sand People," I murmured as I crouched down, undressing one of the corpses with a grimace. I straightened, picking up the blood stained desert robe. "It may get us inside the base. Though I doubt Zaalbar would fit one of these robes."

"Then that's what we'll do!" Mission piped up determinedly, and ran over to another corpse. "If it's the only way to rescue Griff, then let's do it."

"I have a bad feeling about this," Carth muttered ominously.

I rolled my eyes. "You sound like a bad actor in an equally bad action holovid."

Carth scowled at me. "Come on, you want to dress up as these primitives to get inside their base? How crazy is that?"

I walked over to him, and lowered my voice. "If it's the only way to help Mission, then yes, I'll do it. No one's forcing you to tag along, flyboy."

His eyes, dark and intent, stared down at mine in frustration. "Fine," he said finally. "I suppose someone has to be there to drag both you and Mission out of trouble."

I grinned, and stepped away. _Time to get moving. _Zaalbar was going to be mightily angry when I told him he couldn't accompany us all the way due to his height and distinctive build. _We'll cross that road when we get to it._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:  
Brynn** - Yeah, I had difficulty thinking of just how angry both Jen and Bastila would be at each other. But it's definitely not the end of Jen's ranting! Regarding training - well, I just don't see Basi letting Jen get her training from someone so recently returned from the DS - doesn't mean it won't happen, just Basi will try her best not to let it.  
**Dark Lord Daishi** - Yep, poor woman :)  
**gamefreak152** - thanks :)  
**gamorrean princess** - lol, you are so right! I haven't thought of that connection before, but Bastila could **so** train as an Aes Sedai! Can you imagine her with a warder?  
**Data** - She was injured, yes. Remaining memories suppressed? Yes. Thank you, glad you are still enjoying :)  
**Red Mage Neko** - I advise you not to stand too close to the fan ::evil grin::_


	28. A trap and a discovery

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-eight – A Trap and a discovery**

_- Canderous Ordo -_

* * *

The sun glinted annoyingly into my visor-less eyes, and sand was collecting underneath my battle armour. _What am I doing here, following these idiots? _My skin chafed underneath sweaty, stifling clothes, and it irritated me that Bastila was dealing better with the elements than I was. Maybe the Jedi had some sense in mind when designing those ugly robes, other than trying to look like a bunch of pansy old women. _Damn me, but I need to see some action. _

I should have followed Jen. Now what a sight she had been yesterday, liberally smeared in blood and utterly exhausted, but still with spirit in her eyes. _About bloody time she started acting normal again. _

Still, it was probably time for me to split. Following the Jedi Princess around was about as exciting as duelling with a Mimbanite; and while Jen had a pleasing propensity for violence, her unpredictability and odd meek act lessened the chances of a worthy battle.

_I should go talk to some of the spacers. _There was bound to be one travelling out of Tatooine in the next few days. _Might head for Corellia or Nar Shadaa. Find some mercenary work to make use of my talents. _

I missed the glory of the old days. When we fought for the clans, for the honour of Mandalore and the challenge of a worthy foe. I had often wondered what the fate of my race would have been, had Revan accepted the title of Mandalore.

"Bah," I muttered to myself, disgusted at this lamenting of the past. The ronto underneath me squawked, and I held onto the leathery strap tighter.

Bastila had halted up ahead, and was busy dismounting. A slight breeze wafted a film of sand into my eyes and I cursed again. _That was idiotic, not bringing along a visor. You are becoming careless, Ordo. _I needed something to stir my battle instincts, and one incident a day with a bunch of ill-equipped primitives just didn't cut it.

_A shame we are not further south, into the heart of the Sand People territory. _They were reputedly fierce fighters in packs; so far we had only seen a few lone individuals.

"There is a cavern up ahead," Bastila informed me primly, motioning for me to dismount.

"You do like dark and shady places, princess," I replied dryly as I slid from the ronto's back. We had already explored three small caves etched into the weathered cliffs, all exhibiting nothing bar nocturnal bats and their respective droppings.

Bastila refused to answer, looking towards Juhani as she walked over.

The Cathar had barely spoken two words to me, presumably because of the plain and simple nature of my heritage. A shame, really, I would have liked to hear why both she and Jen had been so beaten up yesterday. But no, the Cathar had to be predictable and despise me because my people had been victorious over hers.

"It is high noon," Juhani murmured to Bastila, so quietly that I had to strain to hear. "Do you not wish to go after her now?"

An angry, almost petulant, expression crossed Bastila's face as she walked away from me, lowering her voice as she answered. I strode after her to hear her reply. "As I said earlier, Juhani, I have no idea where she is. I may as well continue on with my quest until she deigns to return."

"But surely that mind-link-"

"Does not work that way," Bastila cut the Cathar off, glowering at me when she noticed I was still within hearing distance. I smirked, and she narrowed her eyes in annoyance.

"What?" I said innocently. _All morning the two of them have been waffling on in secret. As if I give a mynock's tail about their Jedi crap. _The one and only reason I had for deliberately eavesdropping was purely to aggravate the Jedi princess.

Bastila lifted her snooty nose in the air, and turned her back on me. "I can sense emotions and Force use, Juhani. But not location – well, not accurately enough to be of any help. She will return." Bastila gave another angry sigh, and muttered under her breath. "She had better."

I quirked an eyebrow in interest. Most of what Bastila was spouting didn't seem to make much sense, other than she was talking about Jen. Bastila had been in a black mood all day, and the only reason I'd agreed to tag along after her was out of sheer boredom.

"We should get on with things," Bastila said briskly, walking towards the nearby cliff.

"Time to slaughter some more bats, then," I commented as I slung my heavy blaster over a shoulder. Taking potshots in the earlier caves had been a way to kill some time and severely piss off Jedi princess in the process, but it was hardly stimulating.

"You should have a little more respect for life," Bastila told me coldly.

_Curse you, Jen, for not asking me along today. _And boy, had Bastila been ready to spit daggers when she woke and found the entire party gone bar us three.

"And you should have a little more sleep, princess. You might wake up in a better mood then."

"I had a... disturbing night," she responded, thin-lipped.

"I can feel something. This place..." Juhani murmured distantly.

Bastila blinked, looking at the Cathar in surprise. She closed her eyes, and breathed in sharply. "You are correct. I feel it too."

"Feel what? The blasted heat of the sun, or the annoying mites biting at your face?" I growled. It was unlike me to get so frustrated with my environment, but I usually wasn't so ill-prepared. _All I have is this dented coat of armour that Davik used to parade about in. _It was as ugly as it was tight-fitting. _At least it is some protection. Davik wasn't a complete moron. _I didn't want to explore the real reason for my aggravation. This planet reminded me too much of my homeworld, and too much of a glorious past that far overshadowed my present.

"No, you simple mercenary!" Bastila snapped. My temper was about to break when, to my surprise, she apologized. "Forgive me Canderous, I am afraid my emotions are getting the best of me." The words sounded a little forced.

I barked in sudden laughter. "Will wonders never cease."

She glared at me, but turned to Juhani. "Come, Juhani, let us explore this cave. Be guarded, I fear the Dark Side may be strong here."

I groaned audibly. All day Bastila had been harping on about the Force to Juhani, and had even gone as far as giving the Cathar a lightsaber, after discovering that Jen had taken both Juhani's and one of hers. _Now that's ballsy. Stealing a saber from not one, but two Jedi. _I had to assume the Cathar was a Jedi, though it appeared as if the warrior spirit of her race had departed her in defiance at such a weak role. _Jedi. What am I doing, surrounded by mystical fools? _Jedi were powerful enough, to be sure, but from all I had seen of them they preferred sitting on their fat behinds and talking solemnly to actually taking any action. _The Sith are just as bad, with their lust for pain and needless waste. _I enjoyed victory as much as any Mandalorian, but did not see the point in creating suffering unless there was a reason for it. _I've seen Sith get themselves physically excited over torturing someone. _It had actually disturbed me a little, which was surprising in itself.

Bastila and Juhani had already approached the mouth of the cave up ahead, and I walked briskly to catch up. The cavern itself appeared to be rather large from the outside, and my interest was piqued. _Could be something in here, for a change. Maybe even Bastila's precious relic. _

The two paused just inside.

"This is it. This is the cave she dreamt of," Bastila murmured to herself, as she eyed over the cavern walls and rocks.

"Dreamt?" Juhani queried. "What do you mean?"

"Uh, nothing," Bastila stammered, taking a few steps futher into the dark, musty interior. _She sure does like being secretive. _Not that I cared, I doubted anything the Jedi would store inside her pretty little head would be of interest to me.

"It is that mind-link, is it not?" Juhani persisted.

"Please, I would rather not speak of it," Bastila said stiffly, disappearing further into the shadows.

A rotting stench wafted past my nose, and I stopped. "Mandalore's balls, what is that gods-awful stench?"

"I would appreciate it if you watched your language, Canderous," Bastila's imperious tone cut through the air. "Particularly around Mission, she is impressionable enough without listening to that."

_She really is priceless. _"I think the kid's already got an impressive vocabularly, princess," I drawled. My eyes were drawn to the sandy ground, relatively sheltered here near the opening of the cave. Enough light still flickered in for me to make out footprints. I frowned.

"Someone's been here. Recently, too," I informed them.

"I doubt that," Bastila responded icily. "Even the Sand People do not often travel to this area. The taint in the Force here can be felt by most creatures, and it keeps them away."

"Distrust my eyes, do you? Look for yourself then," I said flatly. _Any more smart comments and I swear I'm going to punch her._

Bastila sniffed, and approached, frowning as she eyed over the tracks. "I-I guess it must be some of the Sand People, then. They do consider this desert their territory, after all. Either that or one of the local hunters."

I'd only encountered the primitives a handful of times, but it was enough to make me dubious. _These tracks look more like a larger humanoid. Maybe it was one of hunters then._

"What is this creature? This must be the source of this smell, but I have never seen anything so large before," Juhani called out from further inside. Bastila's head turned, and she walked closer to investigate.

The human tracks I'd spotted made me wary, and I kept an eye on the cave opening. _It's not like anything is hunting us, but only an imbecile ignores warnings._

"That is the remains of a krayt dragon," Bastila responded to the Cathar. "It was slain about four years ago."

"Are you sure, Bastila? I would have thought there would be... less to see, as such. Natural predators and scavengers surely would have picked the bones clean, rather than leaving it to rot for so long."

That roused my interest, so I moved further in to investigate. A monstrous corpse loomed before my vision as I approached the others, dim light from the outside world glinting on the discoloured bones. The flesh had rotted and decomposed, but Juhani was correct.

"The Cathar's right," I stated. "I'd say this animal bit the dust maybe a year ago, at most."

"I said before, the dark Force aura of this place will keep most creatures away," Bastila informed us in a superior tone. "Mites and flies, perhaps not. But any larger scavengers would not venture in here."

_More Force crap. _"And if that's so, princess, then why would a krayt dragon hang out here? I'd call that a fairly large creature."

I could make out Bastila folding her arms in the semi-darkness. "Some animals have a natural resistance to the Force, while others are attracted to such an evil presence. Krayt dragons belong to the former category. Which makes it all the more impressive that this one was killed."

"Well, if you two are so afraid of this scary Force presence, then your little relic better be here," I grunted.

"It is," Bastila said coldly, and walked around the huge rotting corpse to further descend into the bowels of the cave. I amused myself by rifling through the various decaying humanoid bodies that surrounded the has-been dragon. _Looks like many hunters tried to take this thing on. _I found little of use; a few grenades that were probably past their use-by date, some poor fool's holocron, and a bottle of Corellian whiskey. _Now this is a find._

"Is this it, Bastila?" Juhani's voice rang out, and a second later I heard Bastila gasp.

"Yes. The first of the Star Maps. I have done it!" A pause then, and maybe she remembered she wasn't actually alone. _Should have left the spoilt brat back on Taris. _"We have done it," she amended hastily.

I heard a faint click, and the whirring of something mechanical. A glaring blue-white light blinded my night-vision, and Juhani gasped in wonder.

"This is the source of the evil taint we can feel? What is it, Bastila?"

"A navigational chart, of sorts."

She was right, I discovered as I closed in on it. A large blue orb made of light hung in the dank air, depicting galaxies and planets of the known universe. _I wonder where this map leads to, what its purpose is. I doubt Jedi princess will tell us. _Bastila had taken out a datapad, and was busy jotting down notes in the eerie blue light it emitted.

"I have what I need. We should leave now." Bastila somehow deactivated the device, and the glowing chart vanished. Thin metal arms of the device closed in on themselves as my eyes readjusted to the darkness.

Bastila began heading back to the desert, with Juhani in tow. I stayed for a moment longer to eye over this relic with interest. _What had she called it? A Star Map? _Bastila had also informed Onasi earlier that this was the Republic's only chance of gaining victory over Malak and his forces. _Maybe if I stick with them, I'll get to see some action._

I frowned, and decided against it. _I'd kill Bastila within a week. _And the Republic didn't look too kindly at ex-Mandalorian heroes. _Face it, Ordo, you'd have better chances with the Sith. Possibly more fun, also._

But there was greater honour in fighting for the side with weaker odds. _No. I don't wish to see either the Republic or the Sith win this fight. I'm going my own way._

I noticed that the two Jedi had stopped ahead, just within the cave. The stiffness in their stance alerted me, and I pulled out my blaster.

"How nice to see you again, Jedi Bastila," a deep-throated and very familiar voice yelled from the desert outside. _Calo Nord? _My muscles clenched in readiness as I stalked forward cautiously. _Not bad, tracking us to Tatooine._ I was impressed despite myself. _It was too much to expect him to die back on Taris. Though it almost sounds as if he's after Bastila, rather than me._

"Calo Nord, the bounty hunter," Bastila acknowledged. I closed in behind her, and saw Calo's shadowy figure standing outside, alone. He was also unarmed, though he appeared to be clutching some small object in one hand. That immediately raised my suspicions. "I urge you to walk away, Calo. I do not wish to indulge in any violence that is not necessary."

Calo laughed mockingly, and I almost joined him at Bastila's prim words.

"It's your end, Jedi," he sneered. I lifted my repeating blaster to aim. "You and that Mandalorian worm, I know he's cowering behind you somewhere. What a shame you didn't bring your little leashed Sith Lord along. She, at least, is worth more alive than dead."

I realized Calo's intention before he depressed the trigger on whatever he was holding. _It's a detonator! The tracks I spotted earlier – he's lined this place with mines! _

A deafening blast ripped through the air, and the cave wall collapsed. I had already grabbed both Jedi by their robes, and was dragging them further into the cave as an explosive wave crested over us. The ground rumbled and roared, and boulders began to fall.

"Get further into the cave!" I yelled hoarsely, stumbling as a rock slammed into my shoulder, dislodging my grip on the Jedi. "It's our only chance!"

Mines were still being triggered; Calo had been meticulous in his work. _But the cave will be more stable further in. _

"The Force! Juhani, help me push these rocks!" Bastila screamed. The cavern mouth had already caved in, blocking out any natural light.

"Don't be an idiot!" I growled. "Even if you do make it, Calo will kill you immediately!"

I ran further into the collapsing cave, gravel and dirt raining down on me. _Which is better than boulders, at any rate. _I didn't bother with the Jedi any longer, they would either pick the smart choice or the fatal one.

One last huge explosion ripped through the remains of the cave, and I was catapulted forward. Headfirst into that odd Force device, as rocks rained down around me.

A sharp searing pain as I struck, and then nothing.

xXx

"He's alive." Bastila's words hazily threaded through my awakening consciousness. Not the first sound I wished to hear upon waking, and with a grim sense of irony I realized this was the second time she had come to my aid when I had been knocked unconscious. "It is merely concussion. I believe you are worse off, Juhani."

"It is nothing," the Cathar spoke softly. "Nothing compared to our current predicament."

I flexed my shoulders and opened my eyes. Nothing met them.

"Canderous, you are awake," Bastila acknowledged in the darkness.

My hands felt dirt and stones on the ground. I heard a faint rumble of rocks settling somewhere above us. My head throbbed. "Ugh, I feel like I've just downed a whole bottle of Corellian whiskey. Speaking of which..." I trailed off, and struggled to sit up in search of my pack which contained said whiskey. It was no longer on my back. "Where's my pack? How long was I out for?"

"A few minutes, no more," Bastila informed me. There was silence, and then a small orb of yellow light flickered into life, reflecting Bastila's strained face and Juhani's form behind her. I winced, but took the time to look at our surroundings. We were, literally, trapped. Caved-in walls of rock surrounded us.

I laughed harshly. "Calo sure knows how to do his job, the bastard." I saw my pack next to me, ripped from my back as I had fallen.

"Except that we are not dead," Bastila replied primly.

"Not yet, until our air runs out," I told her dryly, but she had a point. _As long as breath fills my lungs, victory can still be had. _I would track down that bounty-hunting slime, and disembowel him. Death by either suffocation or starvation was an insult, and I refused to give him that pleasure. "So, how'd Calo track you down here then, princess?"

Bastila stared at me in silence, her eyes widening in alarm. Her mouth opened to say something, and then closed again.

"This place attracts undesirables. I am glad I did not sense it earlier, before..." Juhani trailed off in a quiet voice, almost too soft for me to hear. I glanced sharply at the Cathar, but she had turned away in the flickering light. _Bloody enigmatic Jedi. Always spouting drivel._

"He must have known," Bastila whispered. "Malak must have sent him. My worst fears are confirmed then. Malak knows of this quest."

_Now we're attracting attention from Darth Malak. And I have yet to see any credits. _"Let's just focus on getting out of here," I said harshly. _What are you doing here, Ordo?_

Bastila glanced around at the jagged rocks surrounding us, obviously searching for inspiration.

"Maybe- maybe you can use that mind-link to call for help?" Juhani asked Bastila softly. The Cathar made little sense, as usual.

"No. She has enough things to deal with, at the moment." Disapproval and underlying anger dripped from Bastila's voice. "And I am sure we can figure out a way to escape between the three of us."

"I am surprised I didn't recognize her," Juhani's voice was a mere whisper, but it suddenly slammed remembrance of Calo's parting shot into my head. _What a shame you didn't bring your little leashed Sith Lord along. _My muscles tensed, my thoughts raced. "I met her once, when I was young," the Cathar continued.

"Please, please do not bring this up," Bastila pleaded in an unusually desperate voice.

_There is only one person Calo could be referring to. _Calo always had been soft in the head. But Bastila's reaction was not what I would have expected, had Calo been deluded.

_Revan is meant to be dead._

Yes, dead, by the hand of none other than Jedi Bastila Shan.

Incredulous laughter escaped me. "Oh, this is priceless." _Could this be? The only Jedi I respect has been with me all this time? _"I always thought you were too weak to be the one who had killed Revan."

She gave no response, and the little orb of light flickered out, depriving me of my chance to see her reaction. The silence that surrounded me seemed icy, though, and I smirked to myself.

"Jedi do not kill if they do not have to, _mercenary,_" her words lashed out in condemnation. "You will forget everything that Calo Nord has just said to us."

Her words sounded heavier somewhat, and strangely compelling. "Not bloody likely, princess," I grated out. "Revan is the one who defeated Mandalore, in hand to hand combat. Without using the Force." The majority of the galaxy believed Revan to be male, but the Mandalorians knew different. I sorely wished I had seen that blood duel, done in true Mandalorian style. Revan had honoured our traditions, and gained our respect. "She could still potentially take that title, if she wished."

"You will forget it! You will think of her as only Jen Sahara, and no more!"

Again, I felt an irrational desire to listen to her, to believe her. _Is she using some sort of Force hocus pocus on me? _My temper broke, and I struggled to stand in the darkness. "You looking for a fight, Jedi?" I spat, pain pounding through my head as I moved. "You think you can do your little tricks on me and get away with it?" It was time she was taught a lesson or two.

"You do not understand what's at stake!" she cried in response. I cursed my inability to see in the darkness, and my lack of suitable goggles.

"She doesn't know, does she?" I bit the words out, realizing the truth behind the matter. _Why else would Bastila want to keep this such a secret? _"She doesn't know who she is. And you Jedi are keeping it from her. What did you do, lobotomize her?" I'd always assumed her little nervous act was exactly that – an act. Now I wasn't so sure.

"No! Her mind was almost totally destroyed – we did the only thing we could to save her!"

Another harsh laugh escaped me. "Well, maybe it's time she found out the truth about herself."

"No. No!" Bastila was breathing heavily in the dark, her voice strained and panicked. "I will make you listen to reason, Canderous!"

"Use those tricks on me again, and I'll kill you," I told her flatly, sincerely.

"Then, please, just listen to me!"

I paused, my fists clenched. "I'm listening, princess," I said in a low voice. I wondered if Bastila was considering using the Force again. I was by far stronger than her physically, but it was all too easy to underestimate Jedi and their powers, I knew that much.

I heard Bastila take in a deep, unsteady breath. "Canderous, her mind was almost destroyed when- when we captured her."

"Destroyed?" I taunted derisively. "Is that your scary Dark Side you always harp on about?" Dark or Light, I cared not. I had respected and admired Revan, and right now I was thinking of Jen in a whole new light.

"No, not the Dark side. She was catatonic, Canderous. Comatose."

I frowned in the darkness, trying out this new, bizarre idea. _Revan, who made the galaxy tremble, catatonic? The one who defeated Mandalore, a vegetable? _"She's hardly a vegetable now, princess," I grated out.

"But if-if she found out suddenly about her identity, that could happen again! Her-her mind could break-"

"This is rubbish," I said flatly. "You are trying to keep her weak."

"No!" she interrupted loudly, and I heard the rush of air at her annoyed sigh. "Surely you have heard about the effects of amnesia. You seem to think highly of Revan." A note of disgust entered Bastila's crisp inflection. "Are you willing to take that chance?"

I stayed silent, my mouth twisted in a grimace. _Jedi tricks. Can I really believe this trash she is spewing? Revan was the opposite of weak. But if the Jedi have really screwed with her mind..._ I wondered exactly how much of Jen Sahara was still Revan, scourge and hero of the Republic.

"For the time being, at least keep quiet," Bastila's words were soft, and yet somehow heavy and laden with meaning. "You will not let anyone know this knowledge."

My head injury pulsed with a sudden pain, and I felt somewhat dazed. Dizziness almost made me stumble in the dark, and my hand lifted to feel something sticky through my short hair. "I won't let anyone know about this," I muttered, just to keep the princess quiet. I wasn't entirely sure what I was agreeing to anymore.

"Good." Bastila sounded pleased, superior. I rolled my eyes in the darkness. _Why am I giving her the victory? _I couldn't quite remember what we had just been talking about.

_Revan, we were talking about Revan. _

Oh yes. I would be very keen to see Jen again, and find out for myself exactly how much she recalled.

_But no one needs to know who she is._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Red Mage Neko - me too!_

_Dark Lord Daishi - glad you like :)_

_gamorrean princess - lol, someone's gonna try that crossover I bet :snicker: Can't you just see it? Rand - "I am fated to face the Dark One"... enter Revan "You called?" :P_

_Brynn - :laugh: glad you like! It's just too easy to harass Carth. Regarding Big Z and Mission... well, I did have a chappie on Zaalbar on Tatooine (chap 22 I think), I wasn't actually going to do either of them until after Tatooine, but you've convinced me to do a Mission one earlier - especially with Griff entering the picture. She'll be probably chap30 I think. I'll do Zaalbar soon after her (there's also a multi-POV one coming up). I didn't quite follow your suggestion with the Sand People - did you mean you thought it was too easy to negotiate with them in the game considering how incredibly hostile they were meant to be? Basi's explanation to the others will come - it will have to - ...though currently the only person really following her is Carth (Juhani's unsure, Canderous is bored/looking to move on (until the end of this chap), Mission & Zaalbar follow Jen)._

_snackfiend101 - :grin: I'll make sure not to call you snacky!_

_game-freak152 - street kid's there...just lurking in the background and getting overshadowed by EB for now. _

_Terin Kail - Thanks for the review! that made my day :)_

_Firera - Argh a case of me writing before I think again... hrm, I wonder what sort of sports they do have... I'll think of something & correct it, thanks for pointing it out :)_

_Lilina :grin: don't let the homework get you down!_


	29. A darker turn of mind

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-nine – A darker turn of mind**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

I dodged underneath a crudely designed gaffi stick, and impaled the offending primitive on one of my lightsabers. My face flushed with the heat of battle as I twirled around, slashing the last remaining native across the chest. I panted heavily in the now empty room, and felt the tickle of perspiration underneath the constricting disguise I was still wearing. 

I could hear cries and grunts back in the direction of the desert, and wondered frantically where the others were. HK was still guarding my back, but I'd lost Carth and Mission upon entering the Sand People base. The natives had ambushed us directly after we'd slipped past the turrets, and in the ensuing carnage I'd simply hacked a way out.

_The bastards could have at least listened to us. _I'd commanded HK to try and communicate with the Sand People, but they'd seemed so enraged at our appearance that they had attacked on sight. _I knew these disguises wouldn't fool them close up, but I thought we'd at least get a chance to negotiate._

I eyed over my surroundings; I was in a long clay-built corridor surrounded by corpses. My heartbeat was slowly returning to normal, and I could feel the sting of bruises on my back where a few gaffi sticks had hit home. _Thank the Force for armour. _One on one I could best any of these primitive natives, but in the earlier mob... _I wish I hadn't been separated from the others. _I'd tried to reach out to the Force, but it had danced tantalizingly out of reach, and I knew instinctively it was due to my own incompetence rather than Bastila's interference.

_She's been too busy ranting at me to bother blocking my Force use. _Perhaps she'd gathered enough sense not to push my anger any further; not that it would change things, I still fully intended not to return. She also appeared to be dealing with her own crisis, if the waves of panic and fright pulsing through our mind-link were any indication.

HK trod insensitively on a corpse as he neared me. "Observation: These organic meatbags are very poorly designed. All soft and squishy, infinitely easy to blast into a pile of rendered flesh." Was that a note of glee I heard in my droid's metallic voice? Probably. _Whoever programmed this sarcastic robot is someone I'd like to meet, and thank. _Where my lightsaber had failed to strike down one of those annoying hooting Sand People, HK easily dispatched them.

I turned back, fully intending to go after the Carth and Mission. _I hope they're okay. _I only cared for the potential backup they could be in a fight. _I'd be gutted if either of them were hurt._

_Shut up! _The only thing that truly mattered was mastering my Force ability. When I acted on pure instinct and emotion the power flowed effortlessly through me, melding into a truly magnificent feat. _But when I consciously try to use it..._

I sighed, and focused on clearing my mind. The Force had evaded me since our altercation with those Czerka miners hours earlier, and I didn't comprehend why. _Bastila said one's mind had to be clear and serene to access the Force. _Yes, but she had also said the Dark Side was weak. _Why am I trusting her lies? My own experience tells me that I am strongest when the battle rage has consumed me. When I'm angry._

_Yes, angry. Give in to it!_

_No, there must be a better way!_

I shook my head in irritation, and took a resolved step back towards the base entrance. I would conquer this power, no matter what it took.

My attention was snatched by the sound of impending footfalls behind me, followed by a barbaric roar as another mob of Sand People rounded the corner. I twisted sharply, and saw HK lift his rifle. The natives raised their sticks high in challenge, grunting and honking as they charged.

"HK, take out the blaster wielding ones at the back. I'll deal with the rest," I commanded him, as I held my ground. The Force pulled at my senses, and I mentally floundered after it. _Focus! _I parried the swipe of the first primitive, and knocked him down with my off-hand 'saber.

"Statement: With glee, master," HK chortled, firing into the midst. Two Sand People charged at me simultaneously, and a surprised snarl erupted from my throat as I lurched backwards just in time. _Build on the anger! Let it become one with the Force! _A gaffi stick whirred past my ear, and I feinted to the left instinctively, stabbing one of them clean through in passing. The second native howled, swiping at my head ineffectively. I rolled evasively, slicing through his legs as I ducked. His agonized scream coupled with a spray of warm blood fuelled the hot adrenaline pumping through my system.

My vision snagged on one of the Sand People further back, who was aiming some large device directly at me and HK. _A rocket launcher! _More technology they had obviously pilfered from Czerka. I snarled in outrage as I recognized the threat, my hand raising instinctively and my mind pushing outwards as the enemy fired.

The entire back wall of the Sand People's dwelling exploded furiously as the rocket slammed back into the one who'd fired it. The ensuing blast washed over me, and I stumbled backwards. Corpses of Sand People littered the floor ahead, and the ones surrounding me fell down at the backlash of the explosion. I quickly speared my lightsaber into the survivors.

My breath came in short bursts as I eyed over the carnage surrounding me. Indifference and disgust warred for dominance, and I closed my eyes briefly. _The Force came to me again. The more I practice, the easier this talent becomes. _In a way I was glad the others were not with me, I wasn't particularly comfortable experimenting with the Force around my companions for reasons I didn't wish to consciously investigate.

_Maybe because I act like a psychotic moron when I let the Force overpower me?_

And yet, how many times had it saved my life? How much more powerful was it making me?

**_We are trapped._ _Trapped in a cave, with no way out! _**Bastila's thought trickled through the bond, and I doubted it had been meant for me. _I am starting to hear her thoughts. _Well, that made sense; she had already shown her ability to read my mind. _I wonder then, if it's possible for me to cut **her** off from the Force? _That was a very interesting supposition, but I quickly shut my thoughts down before Bastila could overhear them. _Keep the thoughts small. Don't let her into my mind again, _I berated myself. If nothing else, the close mental proximity I had with Bastila was good for my emotional control. I'd be damned if I'd allow that snot access to my thoughts, and I was beginning to overlay all my emotions with a cool wall of detached indifference.

I noticed then the large hole the rocket had ripped into barbaric clay walls of the base, and saw another room through it. Occupied with more Sand People, who had strangely not yet rushed out in a vain attempt to eviscerate us. _More practice for my growing Force powers._

"Supposition: These meatbags appear to be guarding something, master. Maybe their leader?"

"Let's go find out." I could feel a dark, bloodthirsty grin wrapping itself on my face. I was starting to relax more in this role. _Fighting and killing is what I do best, _I realized. _No! I may get into trouble, but I don't deliberately hurt people! This slaughter is unnecessary. _I glanced at HK as he walked up next to me. Smatters of fresh blood were just visible over his red paint-scheme. _But very, very satisfying. And it's about time to see just how good HK is in battle. _

I advanced confidently into the nearby room, ducking into the torn hole. The Sand People hooted threateningly, raising their weapons in an aggressive challenge. They appeared to be surrounding one primitive in particular, whose robes were decorated in colourful beads. _HK was right. This is their chieftain._

I ripped the constricting mask from my face, and threw it to the ground. Our disguises had allowed us to enter the dwelling unnoticed, but it had not taken long for some of the Sand People to distinguish us as invaders. They had given us no chance to even attempt communication, attacking immediately and ignoring anything my robot tried to say. _Zaalbar must be going mad. _We'd left the Wookiee behind in the desert, much to his dismay and loud protests. I'd eventually told him he could accompany us if he fit into one of the Sand People garments. As we departed, he was still soulfully staring at the offending robe.

A louder hooting caught my attention, and I noticed the leader was yabbering something.

"Statement: The meatbag chieftain appears to have recognized us, master."

"Huh?" I blinked in confusion. "I've never been here before." I glanced around at the barbaric building. Wicker baskets and grass mats covered the dusty floor. Some odd sticks hung on the wall. No sense of déjà vu hit me. "At least, I think I haven't."

"Extrapolation: It appears the chieftain recognizes both of us, master. He is now demanding an explanation for our presence."

I looked at HK, who was staring unblinkingly at me with his eerie, red gaze. "Have you been here before, HK?"

"Answer: I have no recollection of such a visit, master. However the majority of my memory is still locked within my core. Extrapolation: It could be that I have been here before, or it could be that another similar droid has and these primitive meatbags cannot distinguish between us."

"Your memory is locked away?" I vaguely remembered HK saying something about that back in Yuka Laka's store, but it was one big hazy memory. _Thank you, Jen Sahara. And Bastila, and any other Jedi responsible for my screwed up mind. _"HK, remind me to ask you about that later. And to fix your shields while I'm at it." I hadn't had a chance to fully repair him after the fight with Juhani.

"Response: As you wish, master. Suggestion: Perhaps I should say something to the chief meatbag before we blast them all?"

The Sand People were still protesting loudly in their guttural tongue. At any moment they were going to attack again, and I would never find out what they meant. "Ask them why I was here earlier. And who else was with me. And ask about Griff."

HK honked and snorted something in that ridiculous language, and the leader responded.

"Statement: He appears confused by your question, master. He has said that one other human meatbag was with us, and you were searching for ruins in the Eastern Dune Sea. He also demands that you answer his earlier question, and explain why you have attacked his people when you did not last time. Observation: He appears unwilling to answer any more questions until we respond to his."

I almost stumbled in surprise at HK's response. _Searching for ruins in the Eastern Dune Sea? _That was precisely what Bastila was doing right now. _That seems awfully coincidental. If I really was here before, then why did the Sand People not kill me?_

"HK, inform him that his people fired on me first, and would not respond to our attempts to talk or negotiate."

The droid did as instructed, and turned to face me once more. "Statement: Fortunately, it appears bloodshed cannot be avoided, master." At HK's ominous words, I quickly reset the energy shield Mission had flung at me earlier. "The chieftain has responded that he must slaughter us to avenge the death of his people. Commentary: I find this a satisfactory and most enjoyable conclusion."

_Feel the rage. Build on it, let it make you stronger!_

I raised my dual lightsabers, and stared through the red glow at the Sand People ahead. I smiled coldly at them. _Well, the voices in my head can't object this time. It was the chieftain's decision to fight, not mine. _The Sand People cried out in challenge, and charged. There were only six of them in total, but these appeared to be more elite in their capabilities. Two of them flanked the chieftain, and opened fire with blaster rifles.

I lifted one of my hands high, focusing and pulling at the Force streaming within me. _How had I created that lightening against Juhani? _Every time I used the Force, I felt like I was blundering through it, struggling to recall feats I subconsciously knew but could not repeat.

I roared, and abruptly loosed the power burning within me. The Sand People cried as the wave hit them, and I spotted two of them gagging, clutching their throats. _That wasn't lightening! What was that? _I could feel the dark taint I had pushed towards them, writhing and twisting within their bodies. I shook my head irritably in confusion, and used the Force to propel me toward the closest one.

A cold smile plastered my face as my saber sliced clean through a neck. _Power. Power and strength. The Force calls to me! _My instincts kicked in, and I dodged underneath a blow aimed at my head. A cry of exaltation escaped my lips as I cut open the stomach of the next one. _No one can withstand me! I am all powerful!_

One of the Sand People charged at me, snarling as he raised his gaffi stick high. _This is no challenge for me! _I laughed darkly, almost mockingly, and moulded the humming power within my grasp. The barbaric creature flew backwards as I pushed the Force out to him. I threw my lightsaber to follow his descent, and it slashed open his throat. His painful cry ended in a gurgle, and renewed confidence swam through me as my lightsaber snapped back into my hand.

Both of the chieftain's aides had fallen to HK's blaster fire. _Time to take out the leader. _I stalked towards him, and one of the remaining Sand People ran in front, his gaffi stick held high in defence. With a wave of Force power, I propelled the enemy to one side. The chieftain honked angrily as I strode closer.

Another two Sand People cried out in challenge, charging me from the sidelines. I laughed as my hand shot out, static crackling at my fingertips. _Pathetic imbeciles! They think they can survive my onslaught! _Sharp blue electricity embraced them, and flung the two bodies out of my path.

I sneered at the chieftain, surrendering to the dark exultant power within me, my emotions overriding any logical thought. The Force writhed outwards, and I felt it clench satisfyingly around the leader's neck. _Let's see if I can do this better than Juhani. _He rose into the air, clutching frantically at his throat, grunting in distress. _What do you know, I **can **do this better than her. _Another laugh escaped me, as I pulled my grip ever tighter around his throat. His legs jerked spasmodically.

A heavy impact slammed into my upraised forearm, followed by a blossoming of agony. I shrieked loudly in pain, and the chieftain crumpled to the ground. My limb flopped uselessly at my side as I twisted to avoid a second blow from my assailant.

The last primitive who had attacked me grunted, first in fury and then in surprise. He fell, two smoking holes in his back where HK had hit true. I panted, but ran quickly over to the chieftain. He scrabbled to his feet and turned to flee, managing no more than two paces before I drove my lightsaber into his back.

I stood there; fresh waves of pain emanating from my arm as the Force left me. _Sithspit, I think that's broken. _The bent corpse of the leader lay unmoving at my feet, a desolate bloody picture greeting my eyes. The berserker rage fled along with the Force, and mixed in with the agony of my injury was a growing sense of sickening dread.

My skin suddenly felt clammy and cold as I stared at the remains of the Sand People leader.

_How can I get pleasure from this killing? This disgusting massacre? _All at once I felt nauseous, and the acrid taste of bile rose in my throat.

_I do what I want. I prove my worth this way! _

_This is wrong! This is repulsive! This isn't me._

I closed my eyes, horror and repulsion overwhelming the earlier satisfying glee of battle. The voices raged within my mind, and I wasn't sure what I felt anymore. Who I wanted to be.

A strong surge through the bond shattered my internal struggle, and my conflicting thoughts fled. _What was that? _I opened my mind once more to sense my dear old bond sister. Again, the surge of the Force seemed to swelter through her end of the mind-link. _She's using the Force. It feels like compulsion, I think. _Panic and anger emanated from her strongly, but these appeared to be her normal emotions. Well, ever since I'd been bonded to her.

_**This is not working! I need to make him understand!**_

Now this was truly interesting. Bastila had not yet sensed my interest in her predicament, and I tried to make my concentration on our link subtle, unnoticeable. Her thoughts were a swirl of determination overriding her fright.

A monstrous pulse of Force emanated from her, and I almost staggered with it. _That **was** compulsion! _I realized numbly._ And whoever she used it on is probably braindead by now. _A sense of dazed confusion filled me briefly, and I wished I had known exactly what she said, and to whom.

_**Finally, it worked. And he has not realized this time. He will not mention this to anyone anymore.**_

My curiosity could no longer be contained. _You seem to be having fun, _I slammed my thought through the bond.

**_Jen! What are you doing! _**Bastila sounded horrified, and vastly annoyed.

_Wondering what poor sap you are playing with, _I responded dryly.

**_I'm not- I'm not playing! This sort of use of the Force is not to be taken lightly! How- how dare you spy upon me! _**Now she truly sounded furious.

_Oh, that's rich, _I returned snarkily. _Well, you don't need to worry about me anymore. We won't be seeing each other again, mores the pity._

A deadly silence echoed through my mind, before her thoughts returned. **_What are you saying?_**

_What do you think? _I snapped back. _This is the end of the line. I'm not returning. The desert is a wonderful place to vanish in. I certainly don't trust you, and I'd be an idiot to blindly follow you._

_**You cannot be serious! You still have far too much to learn!**_

_I can learn it myself. You forcing that stupid code down my throat is hardly what I'd call productive. _

_**Do not do this, Jen! You are still far too vulnerable to the Dark Side. Not to mention that you are now a target, as well!**_

_A target? _I felt myself sneering at her through the bond. _Is that some sort of threat?_

**_No! I am talking about the Sith, you idiot! _**She paused, and I could feel her deliberately reigning in her temper. **_I am sorry. I did not mean that. I am just under a lot of pressure right now._**

_Sounds like you're under a lot of rocks, as well. _She mentioned something earlier about a cave-in.

**_That is in poor taste, Jen. How long have you been listening to my thoughts? _**Again an imperious tone entered her words. I inwardly marvelled at how she could still sound so snooty and uptight, even in the confines of my own head.

_I'd hardly spy on you out of choice, _I lied. _I can't help it if your panicky thoughts are so loud through our bond._

**_There is no emotion... _**She seemed to be trying to calm herself down.

I snickered. _So you say. What's this about the Sith, anyway?_

_**Calo Nord has attempted to kill us, and is now after you. It appears that Malak wishes both you and I dead. This is why you must stay with me! You are far too vulnerable by yourself!**_

_No way. _I told her coldly. Calo Nord was no threat to me. _I'm on my own now._

"Query: Master, shouldn't we be moving now?"

"In a minute, HK," I forestalled.

_**You have an obligation to Juhani!**_

_What! _Disbelief swirled through me at her utter gall. _In case you forgot, _she_ tried to kill _me!

_**Yes, and you redeemed her! She believes she owes you a debt, and she has not quite yet forsaken the Dark Side. Well, perhaps she has, but she could easily fall back! You owe it to her to ensure she does not!**_

_I can't believe this crap you are feeding me. I am not returning, Bastila. You have your own little quest with those ruins, I'm sure you can keep yourself occupied without my presence._

**_Please, Jen! Allow me to teach you! Why do you have to be so- so frustratingly difficult! _**She was seething, I could tell. It was actually quite funny in a warped sort of way.

_I don't trust you. You tried to trick me onto Dantooine. Where will you lead me next? I don't want to see any of your so-called masters._

Bastila was silent for a long time after that. I dragged my attention back to my surroundings, and the throbbing agony of my arm came back to revisit my senses.

"JEN!" A high-pitched voice yelled in the distance.

"I wondered where they had gotten to," I muttered, and then returned the call.

A minute later, and Mission popped her head around the corner. She appeared relatively unhurt, and squeaked in dismay when she saw my useless limb dangling to one side.

"Oh, Jen! That looks awful! What happened?" She rushed to my side, sympathy flooding her young features. "Sheesh, there are so many corpses here!"

A howl made me aware of Zaalbar, who followed Mission in.

"Zaalbar? I thought you were in the desert."

"(I cannot guard your back if I am not at your side!)" he wailed, distressed when he saw my injury.

"When we lost you and HK in that huge battle, I decided it might be best to go get Big Z. I'd been forced into the turret room anyway, so I deactivated them while I was there and then ran back to find him. It looked like you could use the help, y'know?" Mission looked at me solemnly. I didn't doubt the Twi'lek was brave, and she obviously had been trying to do the right thing.

"Shame you didn't get here quicker." I grinned at her, trying to force my senses away from the pulsating pain of my forearm. "Where's the Paranoid Has-Been?" I did so love HK and his pet-names.

"Oh, very funny," Carth's voice snapped for the adjoining room. "Any cuter and you could be a Gamorrean's sister."

"Better than being a Gamorrean's mother," I quipped back as Carth appeared through the torn hole in the room, scowling at me.

**_Would you agree to accompany me to someplace neutral? _**Bastila's voice washed through my mind once more. **_Some place where there are no Jedi? _**

_What are you suggesting now? _I asked tiredly.

_**You need training, Jen. The Dark Side is ever prevalent. If you refuse to meet with any of the Masters, then I have no choice but to attempt to guide you myself. Please, I implore you to let me help.**_

I was silent, rolling her suggestions around in my mind. _I am still fumbling with the Force. _I forced my thoughts small, behind an outwards show of indifference. _I'll be damned if I'm going to let her notice my indecision. _There was still the matter of the bond, and Bastila's hold over me. I had yet to pin Juhani down for any help as well.

"Have you found out anything about Griff?" Mission demanded suddenly, and I shook myself to concentrate on the Twi'lek. _Nothing like multiple conversations for a nice blend of confusion. Bit like the whole multiple personality thing. _I sniggered to myself, and both Carth and Mission shot me confused looks.

"No, haven't heard anything. Let's go explore," I told the girl, snapping a lightsaber on my belt, and then picking up the other one I had dropped. My broken arm hung limply to the side, and I grimaced in pain.

"You need some sort of brace. We should get back to Anchorhead quickly," Carth said, eyeing me over with a blend of suspicion and concern.

"Hmm," I murmured, not quite sure whether I'd be joining them or not. _I can't fix this arm by myself._ I frowned at the realization, and followed Mission back out into a longer corridor.

_What sort of neutral place are you suggesting? _I asked Bastila. I could almost sense a spark of hope from her, and imagined her sighing in relief.

**_Manaan is a planet that I need to visit on my quest. It is also purely neutral in the war with Malak. There is a Republic base on Manaan, but no Jedi are stationed there. The Selkath do not condone any sort of violence._**

I stepped over corpses of Sand People as we walked further along the base. It looked like a complete and utter bloodbath. _Was this all my doing? _Of course it had been; HK and I had ripped through this place. _No one can withstand me, _I thought with satisfaction. _I'm turning into something repulsive. Something utterly abominable. _Ahh, that'd be Street Kid acting up again. _All this death! No, I cannot bear it! _A quiet whisper from Jen. Odd, she'd been silent since the duel with Juhani. I scowled in annoyance at her reappearance.

_Manaan it is, then. _I responded to Bastila.

"Well, troops, it looks like Manaan's our next destination." I told the group dryly.

"Manaan? What are you talking about?" Carth demanded as we ventured further into the base.

"Manaan? What's that?" Mission queried brightly ahead of us. Sometimes I wondered how she could always be so unfailingly cheerful.

"Some neutral planet," I told her. "Bastila's just agreed to go there next."

Carth stopped walking, and turned to face me, his hands on his hips. His dark eyes flashed with frustration. "You are still rabbiting on about that supposed bond, aren't you?"

I shrugged at him irritably. "Ask Bastila if you don't believe me." Why did I even bother with the man? For some odd reason, I desired his trust, yet at the same time I wished he was anywhere but near me.

"Hey! Is someone there?" a young, male voice called from further ahead. Mission froze.

I strode past her, and towards the rickety door it had come from, thrusting it open with my good hand.

A startled and frightened Twi'lek was crouched in the corner, flinching at my entrance. He blinked, and eyed me over, hopeful surprise entering his expression. "Uh... you there! I'm... I'm a high ranking executive of the Czerka Corporation! Eh... there's a big reward if you take me back to Anchorhead!" His voice sounded smooth and greasy. I didn't trust him on sight.

"Riiiight," I drawled in disbelief.

"Griff!" Mission squeaked, running next to me and brushing past my arm. I groaned in pain, squeezing my eyes shut as fresh agony emanated from my broken arm. "Sheesh, Jen, I'm sorry!"

"Mission?" Griff squawked in surprise, his eyes round. "Is it really you? I heard Taris was destroyed! I thought you were dead! Joy of joys, my little sister is alive!"

I opened an eye to look at him suspiciously; he did actually appear sincere. Mission beamed, and ran further in, literally jumping into her brother's arms.

"(I always like a happy ending,)" Zaalbar growled softly behind me.

"Hmmm," I said noncommittally. I wondered what Mission's plans would be now, and if they involved her brother.

"Sheesh, Griff, you like smell like bantha poo-doo!" Mission complained, as she extricated herself from his arms. "Like Big Z on a really bad hair day!"

"(I do not have bad hair days!)" Zaalbar howled in protest. I smirked as I saw Griff jump at the Wookiee's roar, his blue skin turning a few shades more pale.

"What-what was that?" he whispered weakly.

"Oh, that's just Big Z!" Mission explained brightly.

"Hate to break this up, but we should probably head back before more Sand People arrive," Carth, the voice of wisdom, interrupted. "I hear there are plenty more bases deeper in the desert, and Jen's arm needs to be looked at."

"I'm touched, flyboy," I murmured, grinning at him. He eyed me over blandly.

"Alright, let's get going. We'll catch up on the way!" Mission pulled on her brother's arm, and I stepped back to let them pass. Griff gasped audibly as he spotted the towering Wookiee.

"Zaalbar, this is my brother, Griff," Mission introduced. As she continued the introductions, I spotted another closed door and my curiosity was piqued. I could almost hear some sort of chattering behind it. I strode forward, and kicked it open, the movement jolting a fresh surge of agony through my forearm.

A small party of Jawas met my stunned eyes, and started jabbering at me in an odd dialect.

"(You are not giants made of sand!)" one of them squeaked. To my astonishment, I understood the words, if not quite the meaning. "(You are from the old city new!)"

"What the-" Carth muttered incredulously, swinging around to see what the commotion was. "Jawas!"

"Query: Permi-"

"No, HK," I cut him off. These creatures seemed relatively harmless, and the thought of more pointless slaughter raised the bile in my throat. _What? I enjoy proving my worth!_

"(We are slaves under whip and gaffi,)" a second Jawa spoke up. "(Will you help us? A little help would be returned. Iziz must have sent your coming.)"

I blinked at the tirade. "(Iziz?)" I fumbled in their language, struggling with the sentence structure. "(I do not know Iziz. But you are free to go - there are no more people of the sand alive.)"

"(You speak the language trade!)" one of them responded gleefully. The other bunch jabbered in excitement, and quickly walked past me. "(Iziz will give fair trade to you! Find Iziz!")

I stood back in confusion as the Jawas bustled past me, and down the corridor. "Well, that was odd," I muttered to myself.

"Just how many languages can you speak?" Carth muttered disbelievingly in my general direction. "What sort of University teaches Mandalorian, Shyriiwook _and_ Jawa dialects?"

I sighed heavily, exhaustion and numbing pain overshadowing any quip I could throw at him. "I don't know, Onasi. My memory is all screwed up. I don't really remember my past. I told you before; if you want to know more, ask Bastila." My words had turned bitter, twisted. Carth gaped at me, his jaw dropping in disbelief. I could see stunned surprise whirl in his dark eyes, only to be replaced by his standard suspicious paranoia. I closed my eyes, and turned my back on him.

"(Let us go back. Jen is injured,)" Zaalbar growled. I opened my eyes again to see the large Wookiee staring down at me in concern.

"Yeah, no point sticking around here anymore," Mission agreed, pulling her dazed brother after her.

We trudged out of the decimated base slowly, and I struggled to keep my pain under control. Irritation was pulsing through the mind-link, and I opened my concentration once more to discover what Bastila was doing. _If nothing else, it will take my mind off my arm. And off... everything else that is going on inside my head._

She'd contained her panic rather admirably, but her frustration seemed to be getting the better of her.

_**What does he think he's doing? He'll kill us all, the crazy barbarian!**_

Ah, barbarian. _She must be cursing Canderous._

**_Jen! _**Bastila's startled mind voice homed in on my thoughts.

_Damn._

**_You are listening into my thoughts! Again! _**Indignant was too small a word to describe her tone.

_I'm learning from the best, _I snapped sarcastically. _Besides, your ranting makes me forget my broken arm._

A brief silence. **_It sounds like you have, once again, journeyed into trouble. I suggest you head back to the Ebon Hawk immediately, _**she commanded imperiously.

I sniggered loudly, and Mission stopped to look at me, an eyebrow raised. I waved my hand dismissively. "Just Bastila," I told her dryly. "Trapped in a cave with Canderous for comfort."

Mission giggled a little uneasily as we stepped outside into the bright desert. I wondered if she fully accepted my story of the bond.

_I'm in trouble? Sounds like you're having your fair share, _I shot back. _Stupid Jedi snot, _I added quietly in the recesses of my own mind.

**_Yes, I admit I am not in the most desirable of situations, _**she responded in a forced tone. **_However, I – no! Idiot! _**She cut herself off to concentrate on whatever mayhem Canderous was creating.

_Are you alright? _I queried, marginally concerned despite myself. _No, _I thought to myself._ I'm only concerned because I'd rather have Canderous alive than dead. Nothing else._

**_I do believe his grenades worked. _**Bastila sounded stunned, disbelieving. **_Now I will never hear the end of it._** She seemed to focus on me once more. **_Jen, do be careful out there. Calo Nord is hunting you in the desert. Please, head back to Anchorhead as quickly as possibly._**

I rolled my eyes, and refused to answer her.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Mats Forsen - Thanks! Heres more :)  
Dark Lord Daishi, Data, gamefreak152 & thesnowman - Thanks :) How long will the mind trick last? Will Canderous tell? ...:insert maniacal laughter here:.  
Gamorrean princess - lol I'd pay to watch that duel! (From a very safe distance, of course)  
Brynn - Heh, yeah, though I guess thinking your slightly weird/scary companion is the presumed dead Sith Lord may be something even smart people don't want to consider  
snackfiend101 - rofl! I almost spat out my coffee when I read that. You should write, you know :P  
Red Mage Neko - I'm not very kind to Bastila, am I? She just seems to be getting in deeper and deeper...  
Prisoner24601 - Thank you very much :)  
Lord Valentai - Cheers. Good to see you back, and with another chapter of your story :)_


	30. Sibling relations

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Thirty – Sibling relations**

_- Mission Vao -_

* * *

Sweat dripped down the ends of my unprotected lekku as I trudged wearily behind the others, making my way over yet another endless dune. The bleak desert seemed to stretch for exhausting miles, and the glint of that abandoned Czerka sandcrawler on the horizon was the only break in an otherwise dreary, boring scenery. 

_Yech. Can't wait for some time in the 'fresher. _I turned to look at Griff; he was panting in the desert heat also. _My brother. We're back together! _A bubble of sheer happiness threatened to overcome me. A small, despairing part of me had always expected never to see him alive again.

Griff turned his head to catch my eye, and gave me that cheeky grin I remembered so well.

"I can't believe you're here, sis!" he exclaimed, grabbing my hand and squeezing it affectionately. "Getting me out of tough scrapes as usual! Wow, I hate to think what would've happened if you hadn't come along when you did."

I grinned impishly at him in response. "And Big Z always harasses _me_ for getting into trouble! Wait 'til he gets to know you."

Griff appraised Zaalbar warily; I could tell he didn't know what to make of the huge hairball that was my most trusted friend. I lowered my voice so the Wookiee couldn't overhear. "He's absolutely brilliant, Griff. He's always looking out for me." _Something you never did. _I quashed that thought; I didn't want to ruin our reunion. "You'll like him when ya get to know him!"

"Uh, does he actually talk?" Griff stammered tactlessly.

I glared at my brother in quick anger, grabbing my hand away. "Geez, bro, you're as thick as a Gamorrean! Course he talks. In _Shyriiwook._ Duh."

"Oh right!" Griff countered quickly. "That's what all the growling is then, huh?"

I rolled my eyes at him and walked on. "You always were a little thick."

"And you always were a little precocious!" Griff responded. I stuck my tongue out at him.

_It's like we've never been apart. _The rosy thought dashed through my mind. Griff walked companionably next to me, in a comfortable silence. _It's just like old times. _My brother even looked the same as I remembered; young and carefree, with his headtails looped fashionably around his neck. He'd always been confident - cocky even, in the past. As I eyed him over once more, I noticed he appeared more nervous, or maybe even scared, than I recalled. His eyes flicked over everybody in quick succession, but would never rest in one place for too long. _It has been six years, though. And he **has** just spent days as a prisoner. I'd be frightened witless as well. _

I was just so ecstatic that he was back in my life again.

As we trudged on, memories from my past threatened to counter my happiness. Big Z, rescuing me from those horrible Vulkars, all those years ago. Our determined attempts to learn each other's language, as we stood by each other time and time again. _Griff's never been as loyal to me as Zaalbar has. _No, I couldn't let the past spoil things. _Even Jen, saving me and Big Z from that rancor. If it had been Griff there, he would have run and left me to die. _No!

I shook my head determinedly, and focused on that odd robot ahead of me to distract my thoughts. My eyes slid to Jen, and another hot topic of contention grabbed my consciousness. _Jen. She's back to normal, kind of. _Was it just me, or had she been acting more nuts than usual? _She ran right into that Sand People fight. Sheesh! That scared the living daylights outta me! _But she'd always done that sort of thing, even back in the Undercity on Taris. _Still, there's something not quite right. It's like she's enjoying killing, or something. _I knew Big Z was worried, he'd been even more quiet than normal.

_Either way, I'm glad she's not acting all pathetic anymore. _That had been freaky, and it was all the stupid Jedi's fault. _That snooty cow. I thought Jedi were meant to act all honourable and stuff. Hah! _At least Jen wasn't going to let Bastila have her own way with things anymore.

I ran up to Jen, impulsively deciding to talk to her. She saw me approach, and cocked an eyebrow at me.

"Are things alright?" I blurted out suddenly.

Jen blinked, taken aback. "Uh, yeah. I guess. Why?" She frowned at me.

I shrugged noncommittally. "I dunno, Jen, you've just seemed, sort of, angry and stuff." I trailed off, at a loss for words.

She turned away, staring out at the distant horizon as we walked along. "Lots of people trying to kill you has that effect," she responded finally, in a flat tone.

Her duel with Juhani had been horrifying. I'd been paralysed, unable to do anything bar watch as the terrifying scene unfolded. Even now, I felt surprised that Jen had been able to walk away from it. _She has some sort of effect on people. Juhani followed us meekly to the Ebon Hawk. That was weird. _I didn't want to go anywhere near the Cathar after what I'd seen.

I didn't know what else to say to Jen, so we edged into an uncomfortable silence. Finally she spoke again, forcing cheerfulness into her tone.

"Well, we're off to Manaan next. Think you'll like it there?"

My thoughts brightened as I considered the possibilities. _Big Z swearing a lifedebt to Jen certainly has its advantages. _I'd never had the chance to leave Taris before. I forced that thought away before the recollection of too many old friends now gone hit me again.

"I've never heard of it. What's it like?" I asked quickly.

Jen shrugged. "Bastila says it's a neutral world in the war." Her voice had twisted on the Jedi's name; I couldn't really fault her considering my own opinion of Bastila. "Apparently it's a peaceful world, and violence is not tolerated."

"Sounds too good to be true," I remarked; inwardly the words made me happy. _No violence would be a good thing. _I'd seen too much death lately, and it was beginning to haunt me. Having Big Z hold me during the night as I cried might be comforting, but it was also dead embarrassing.

I eyed Jen over. _No violence for her would be good, too. Maybe she can mellow out a bit more. _I liked Jen, especially since her mischievous temperament matched mine. But she was getting far too good at freaking me - and everybody else - out.

_Well, we're stuck following her lead. Big Z's pretty solemn with his vows, and I ain't leaving him. _I just hoped Jen would ditch Bastila someday soon.

The sun was drooping wearily on the horizon, and I realized suddenly that darkness wasn't too far away. The huge shape of the abandoned sandcrawler we'd passed early that morning loomed next to us, and I ducked into the shadows it cast for a brief respite. Twisted shards of metallic rubble and crates littered the area surrounding the mechanical monstrosity. _Sheesh, it's a regular junkyard round here. _I guessed the damage must have been the aftermath of the Sand People raids.

"How's your arm, Jen?" I asked. She'd barely complained about it at all. _Well, Jen's always been tough. _Except when Bastila was making her act like an idiot.

"It's okay, Mission, thanks." She sounded weary.

"(We should hurry our steps, and ensure we are within Anchorhead before it gets dark. This place is dangerous,)" Zaalbar rumbled.

Jen shot a grin my way, and I returned it.

"The Sand People aren't nocturnal, Zaalbar," Jen said smoothly. "I hope," she muttered under her breath, but I caught it.

"Don't let me die under here!" a sharp, female scream pierced the air. We all froze, and I spotted Griff edging away surreptitiously. Carth was the first to act, running towards the source of the yell. I followed him quickly, but all I could see ahead was large crates and broken bits of metal. _Maybe a surviving miner from the earlier attack?_

"Where are you?" Carth called out. I climbed over some sort of metal crate, searching around in vain.

"Wait guys," Jen yelled suddenly. "Something doesn't feel right!"

"Please! Anyone! I'm trapped under here!" The pleading voice came from directly underneath me. I gasped, and jumped back down to the sand hurriedly.

"Get away, Mission! Bastila warned me there was someone out here hunting us!" Jen cried, running towards me. I glared at her. _Like Bastila knows what she's talking about!_

"We'll help you!" I answered the stranger's voice, tugging at the crate with an effort.

A loud explosion slammed painfully into my body and eardrums alike; I was flung backwards, stunned. My skin burned from the blast; my head echoed with a painful ringing.

I was yanked up suddenly against something rough and hairy. My vision was white from the explosion, my senses dazed. _Huh?_

Cool metal pressed against my temple, and a tight arm squeezed around my waist. A few snorting noises filtered in as the buzzing in my ears gradually dissipated.

"We gots you good now!" a grunting voice squealed from my left. _What? Gamorreans? _

"(Mission!)" Zaalbar roared, and my eyesight, speckled and spotty, vaguely made his form out. I gasped as the iron band around me tightened, and struggled instinctively.

"Move and yous die!" another voice, thick and deep, barked into my ear. The gun pressed harder into my cheek. I froze as my predicament fully hit home. _I'm caught!_

"Let. Her. Go." Jen's voice, low and dangerous. As my vision cleared, I saw a murderous look of rage twist her face, which was illuminated by the blood red colour of her one activated lightsaber, held tightly in her good hand. It both scared and gratified me that I could rouse such anger in her. Carth nudged her angrily, and I saw him mouth the words 'calm down.'

"We did a good ambush and you better pay... uh... maybe five hundred credits now! She die otherwise!" The Gamorrean to my left waggled a piggy finger at me.

_Oh crap. I'm the only one with credits here and I left 'em all back on the Ebon Hawk! _Carth and Jen already owed me quite sizeable amounts. My stomach clenched in terror, and my mouth dried up. My eyes flicked back to Zaalbar; his face was contorted in a snarl. I looked over to my brother, and my eyes widened in disbelief as I saw him on the fringes of our group. He was slowly walking backwards, a look of terrified fear on his face. _He'd just leave me? Leave me here, in the hands of these stinky, ugly pigs? _

A sob wrenched free from my throat unwittingly, and my captor shook me in annoyance. "You shut up now!"

"Yous all pay up now!" a third voice squealed behind me. My eyes flicked desperately between Zaalbar, Jen and Carth; they were all gripping their weapons tightly. That insane robot was just behind them, his blaster also raised. I saw Jen look at Carth quickly, and nod marginally at the Gamorrean on my left. She then indicated for Zaalbar to take care of the other, and hissed something quietly to HK.

"No tricks! We not thick!" my captor insisted in a dull, stupid tone. I tried to force my fear away, but I was shaking despite myself. _Will these horrible pigs really kill me? Is my last sight going to be of my brother, scrambling away in fear? _He had a pleading look on his face, but was still edging away.

Jen abruptly deactivated her lightsaber, and clipped it on her belt. She walked towards me and the Gamorreans, her one hand outspread. My captor dragged me backwards in suspicion, and I choked as his hold tightened. _Jen? What are you doing!_ Her face tightened in fury as she saw my distress, but she abruptly relaxed her features.

"Here, I will give you the credits," she said softly, directing her statement at my captor. "You are obviously the leader here."

"No, Gurke says me in charge!" the pig on my left protested in a guttural voice.

"I should be leader!" the low voice rumbled past my ear.

Jen looked past me, straight into the eyes of the Gamorrean holding me. "Yes, you are the strongest one here. I will give you the money." She dug a hand in her pocket, as if fishing for the credits, and walked closer. _What's she doing? She doesn't have any cash!_

My captor squealed in delight, and released me to eagerly gather Jen's non-existent offer. I squeaked and stumbled backwards at my new found freedom, and saw a vicious snarl reappear on Jen's face. She jumped towards me suddenly, pushing me to the ground roughly as HK opened fire over her head.

I gasped as the air was squeezed out of me and heard Jen grunt in pain as she landed on top of me.

"Jen!" I wailed helplessly, more in fright than anything else.

"Stay still!" she hissed into my ear. I could hear Zaalbar roaring, and a quick flurry of blaster shots; but Jen's weight pinned me to the ground and blocked my view of what was occurring. A thud as someone hit the ground was quickly followed by another two thuds. _What's going on?_

"(Mission!)" Zaalbar roared again, and Jen rolled off me, swearing loudly and colourfully about her arm. Zaalbar lifted me up bodily into his arms; and stunned, I burst into frantic sobs. Zaalbar's arms tightened, and he crooned softly. "(You are alright. They are gone. Everything is alright now.)" My face was pressed into his musky fur.

I sniffed loudly, still dazed and stunned by everything. _I'm crying in front of Jen! And Carth! _I struggled to force back my tears, and pulled away from Zaalbar hurriedly. "I'm okay, Big Z. Really," I mumbled.

Zaalbar still held onto my arms, but slid me gently to the sand.

"Mission, you're not hurt?" Jen was standing next to the Wookiee, her face a picture of worry. I nodded half-heartedly at the human, and belatedly remembered her injury.

"Jen, your arm! Is it okay? You fell right on top of me!"

"I got it out of the way. Sort of." She frowned at me, but I could see lines of strain on her face, which had turned a pale ashen colour. "I'm okay, or I will be when I get some kolto. The explosion – it didn't hurt you too badly? Those Gamorrean bastards!"

"I- I'm glad you're okay, Mission," Carth added. I smiled weakly at him as he turned to frown at Jen. "Why didn't you use the Force, Jen? Mission could have died!"

An uneasy, almost nervous expression flitted over Jen's face. Zaalbar dropped his hands from me, and eyed Jen over warily.

"I didn't want to risk it," she muttered. "Half the time I can't use the Force properly, and then sometimes it doesn't do what I want." She shook her head in bafflement, and continued her ranting. "Not to mention Bastila's potential interference. I just didn't want to risk it, Carth. Not with Mission's life."

Carth looked at her in puzzled surprise; I wasn't sure if I'd ever heard her say his first name before. Zaalbar's expression relaxed to understanding.

"Sheesh, Jen, you saved my life!" I blurted. "Again! I have no problems with how you did it." I sniffed loudly, remembering the rough hands of my captor, and my eyes slid to the bloodied corpses on the ground.

"We all saved you," Jen responded in a dry voice. "Even HK."

"Statement: With pleasure, master. I gleefully await my next order," the robot barked out in his eerie, metallic voice.

_Wow, they did all save me. I'm very lucky, to have friends like this. _I then noticed Griff, standing uneasily further away.

_They all had a hand in helping me, apart from my brother. _

Zaalbar turned to spot my brother, and I noticed his hackles rise. He looked at me again, and stopped whatever it was he was going to say.

"I'm glad you're okay, sis!" Griff blurted out, running towards me suddenly. His lekku flicked in distress; at least he was sincere in his fear. _Fear for me, or for himself?_

I took a step back. "You were pretty quick to walk away, Griff," I mumbled, backing up from him. Griff stopped, and looked at me pleadingly, his dark eyes round and worried.

"I'm no good in situations like that sis, you know that! I didn't want to get in the way!"

"You **ran** away, Griff!" I snapped. He flinched, and the hurt, desperate look on his face eroded my anger. _He tries, I know he does, _I thought guiltily.

"I'm sorry, Mission! I would have helped if I could!" he pleaded convincingly. I wanted to believe him, to trust in my brother and his love, but... the words of Lena came back to haunt me.

I frowned, recollecting that dancing trash and her spiteful remarks. _Could there have been some truth in it? Does he really only get involved with people because of the potential credits he could make? _I loved my brother, I always had, but I was starting to doubt the rosy picture of him I'd always tried to believe in. "Griff," I began. "I... I have to ask you something. It's important."

He blinked at me, his blue eyes staring soulfully into mine. "Fire away, sis. You know I'll tell you the truth."

_Will you? Will you really? _He'd always been so good at lying to get his way. I bit my lip indecisively, and then the words tumbled out. "I ran into Lena. She said... she said it was your idea to leave me on Taris. It's not true, is it?"

His eyes dropped to scrutinize the dry sand at his feet, his hand scratching his chin distractedly. "Ah, well... there's the truth and then there's the _truth_, y'know?"

A further shock slammed into my gut, even though I had half expected that answer. "You mean it's true?" I whispered, and felt tears prick at my eyes once more. _I should have known! _I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. _I did know, deep down. I just didn't want to face it. _"I'm your sister – how could you abandon me like that?"

"You left her behind?" Jen cut in sharply. The others had been silent during our confrontation, but no longer. Jen was glaring fiercely at Griff, her green eyes narrowed in anger. I'd never spoken of my brother to her before. She continued on in a sarcastic voice. "A pretty Twi'lek girl, on the streets of Taris? Why didn't you just sell her to a Hutt while you were at it, you slime?"

Griff took a step away from her in wariness.

"(What you did was wrong!)" Zaalbar growled. "(How could you leave your young sister behind? Have you no honour?)"

"Hey, hey!" Griff protested, alarmed at the Wookiee's rumbling. "Sis, keep your pet on a leash, would ya?" Zaalbar roared loudly and advanced threateningly, causing Griff to stumble backwards, his headtails twitching in fear. "Come on!" he pleaded, his eyes flicking between us all. Even Carth was scowling angrily at him. "Mission, you didn't need me to look after you anymore! You may have been young, but you knew how to take care of yourself! Look at you now! Everything turned out fine!"

Fury crested within me. _He's always taken the easy way out. Always. I should have realized this and accepted it a long time ago. _"That's it?" I challenged. "That's all you have to say to me after all these years of leaving me on Taris? If it wasn't for Big Z and Jen, I'd be dead several times by now!"

"Look, I'm sorry! Could- could we just get back to Anchorhead? Uh, this isn't the best place for this sorta discussion." Griff back-pedalled, anxiously looking between as all.

Jen straightened with a jerk, her expression alert as she scanned the surroundings. I caught her sudden movement and frowned, looking about myself. There was nothing but dunes and that destroyed sandcrawler around us, and I wondered what had snatched her attention so quickly.

"HK," Jen said softly. "Scan the area. I think-" her words were cut off by the sound of an electronic explosion engulfing us all. A sharp blue-white light pierced my vision, and I vaguely felt a static crackle warp through my tech goggles. _An ion grenade!_

"Targetting: Opening fiii..." HK's metallic voice was cut off by another powerful blast, emanating directly from his feet. I could hear the high-pitched fizzing of his circuits.

"Damn, his shields!" Jen's voice yelled through chaos, followed by the hiss of her lightsaber activating.

Griff shrieked, and I spotted him fleeing through the dissipating smoke. Zaalbar grabbed my arm, yanking me behind him as he raised his vibroblade in alarm at the unseen enemy. A sharp, stinging object pierced my shoulder, and I screamed more in fright than anything else. Zaalbar growled and clutched onto his neck. My hand lifted to my shoulder, and I pulled out a small dart. _Huh? _I blinked in confusion as my limbs became weary, leaden with weight. _Poison? Or a fast acting sedative?_

"No!" Jen shrieked loudly. _She's been hit too? _My eyes were heavy with fatigue as I spotted Carth frantically firing into the empty surroundings. Jen dropped to her knees, but her hand lifted up. I wondered if she was trying to use the Force.

Zaalbar roared loudly, and fell down with a crash next to me. _Must stay awake. _I was on my knees without realizing it. A shimmering hazy figure in front of Jen caught my attention. _A stealth belt? _I saw it stumble backwards from an unseen power as Jen's hand raised again. _I've seen her do better._

"Ugh," I said feebly, falling to my side. Even my thoughts were sluggish, too slow to feel the panic I should. A dizzy pounding whirled in my head. Jen fell, shrieking and twisting spasmodically as she landed on her arm.

A man appeared, smirking victoriously over Jen's prone form. _Who is that? _My lids closed despite my struggle to stop them.

"And people think Jedi are hard to capture," a deep voice drawled in the distance as I heard the roar of impending unconsciousness. "All you have to do is catch them by surprise, and be armed with a neural disruptor. Malak will be most pleased."

_Malak? As in, Darth Malak? _My mind was screaming at me, and I struggled desperately to fight the paralysis invading me. A giant metaphorical hole gaped underneath my consciousness, and despite my efforts, I could not stop from falling.

"Sweet dreams," a voice in the distance mocked, and I could no longer tell if it was speaking to me or Jen.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

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	31. Hyperspace: II

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

_**Author's Note:**_

_A note on the Genoharadan - my first inclusion of them is in the following chapter. I really liked the idea of a shadowy assassination order in the game, but didn't like how the Overseers were portrayed. I've taken a few liberties and changed some things (again). Note: Hulas will just be an agent, no more._

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-one – Hyperspace: II**

* * *

**Bastila Shan:**

The late afternoon sun beat down on my head with a vengeance as I walked sedately between the others, an impenetrable silence cloaking us all. I struggled to show nothing but an outer mask of calm confidence, although inwardly my thoughts seethed with frightening intensity.

We had almost reached Anchorhead; as we crested the next dune I saw the large durasteel Czerka gates rise up in my vision. A group of local hunters stood chatting outside them, no doubt passing along wild stories of even wilder hunts whilst they leaned nonchalantly on their respective speeders.

As our steps brought us closer to the settlement, I reached out once more through the cursed bond that linked me to Revan. Again, I met the impenetrable wall she had clouded over her thoughts and emotions, much like the one I had built over my own. _How had she learnt that so quickly? _Revan had all but ignored my warning of Calo, and I feared what could happen out there in the inhospitable desert.

I glanced over at Canderous striding alongside me; after our escape from that bounty hunter's trap the Mandalorian had been both smug and determined, espousing a violent desire to track down Calo Nord. I only wished that Canderous would leave our party for good, but after today's revelations I no longer believed he would disappear of his own volition.

In fact, after today's revelations I was no longer certain that Revan would remain forever ignorant of whom she truly was.

_At least the Force has given me a small reprieve. _I had managed to sway the Mandalorian under my power, but I had my own reservations about whether that would last. _If not for his head injury, I am not entirely sure that it would have worked. And then-_

And then he may have carried out his threat of attack. _He might still, should he ever realize I once more used the Force upon him._

_Worries for another day. One step at a time. _Yet everything around me seemed to be crumbling like a kassi cracker, bit by bit falling to the floor to break into yet more fragments. We were now heading to Manaan, not the refuge I had hoped to find on Coruscant. Revan grew more violent and careless with each passing hour. Canderous and Juhani appeared to hold loyalty to the former Sith Lord; whilst I could understand the bloodthirsty Mandalorian's regard, Juhani was another matter. I had not missed the wondrous, almost awed, expression in the Cathar's eyes when she had learned of Jen Sahara's true identity. Juhani had quietly agreed to say nothing of it, but her exotic face gave away her desire to follow Revan. I feared for her; she had so recently embraced the Dark Side, and surely an attachment to Revan could only lead her back to that grim, desolate place.

_How does Revan do it? _I thought sourly as the gates of Anchorhead loomed closer. _Every one in our party follows her lead. _Carth, perhaps, was the only one who had sworn to help me in my mission, but even he had mixed feelings over Revan. _Why else would he have left with them this morning?_

My anger at Revan had been simmering all day long, ever since I had woken to find that she had gone out for yet another ill-advised, treacherous escapade. My fear, too, had expanded with each additional spark of cruelty that had slipped through Revan's emotional walls into the bond. Now that she was blocking me successfully, and showing an ability to pick up on _my_ thoughts, my fear was in danger of blossoming out of control.

I sighed quietly, breath shuddering in my lungs. I ached for a future time when I could seek out the peaceful sanctuary of a Jedi enclave; when I could enjoy an existence that did not include Revan. I still had the power to easily cut Revan off from the Force, but I dared not use it. _She shattered my shields when she was fighting Juhani. I need to save this power of mine for when I really need it. _No matter how much she infuriated or terrified me in the interim.

**_Mission! No!_** Revan's anguished thought stabbed sharply into my mind, jolting me to a standstill. Canderous and Juhani turned and frowned at me inquiringly.

_Jen? Are you alright? Is Calo there – I warned you! _I desperately thrust my thoughts through the bond, but received no immediate response.

"Bastila?" Juhani asked quietly. "What is it?"

_Jen? Answer me! _"Jen. In trouble," I said shortly, aware that my teeth were clenching as Revan continued to ignore my frantic queries. I opened my mind and tried to reach Revan's, pushing against my instincts which wanted nothing more than to build a thousand Force walls between us. My instincts which screamed with every further mental contact I had with that woman.

**_Those Gamorrean bastards! I can't use the Force, dammit, I can't risk Mission._**

_Gamorreans? _Additional confusion swamped me; I could not visualize Calo Nord using Gamorreans as lackeys. Especially since he had appeared to be working alone when he confronted us earlier. _What is going on, Jen? _

**_Stop interfering! _**Jen all but snarled at me, and shoved me out of her mind so fast that I physically reeled.

_Damn her. Damn that- that- _I breathed in deeply, and forced the words of the Jedi Code to the forefront of my mind.

"Is she okay? Where is she?" Juhani queried again, and I turned to see a look of sharp concern on the Cathar's face. Canderous was looking intently at me also. _How does that psychotic monster command such loyalty? How is it possible?_

"I do not know where she is, Juhani. I told you, the bond does not work that way," I snapped, my tone more curt than it should have been.

Her intense yellow eyes stared into mine, puzzled and maybe a little annoyed. I noticed then that the local hunters were staring at us avidly, curious at our conversation. I eyed them over imperiously, and the majority turned away and feigned interest in their beaten-up speeders.

"Perhaps your bond does not, but the Force itself does," Juhani responded in a soft voice. "If Jen is close enough, surely we could sense her presence through the Force."

I gaped at the Cathar as she closed her eyes. _Of course! Has my very proximity to Revan blindsided me to the very basic uses of the Force? Has it addled my wits? _That Juhani could come to this conclusion rather than I shamed me somewhat. I closed my eyes hurriedly, and reached out to the tantalizing, living power that surrounded every being.

"I can sense her," Juhani's husky voice lilted past my ears. "She is not far. In the direction of that sandcrawler."

I, too, felt Revan's life force, pulsating and thrumming with the Force, spiking with rage. It was not as clear as detecting Revan's emotions through our mind-link, but that had become more and more difficult for me to achieve as she successfully blocked me out.

I opened my eyes to see Juhani pointing towards a metallic object in the distance that winked at us with the late afternoon sun. It was perhaps an hour's walk away, if I judged correctly. A movement out the corner of my eye made me aware of Canderous, striding purposefully towards the nearest hunter.

"Canderous?" I called sharply. _Oh no. What is he doing?_

"You," Canderous stated in his deep gravelly voice, as he stopped in front of a local Duros who had been bantering with his fellow hunters. "I want your speeder."

"What?" The Duros replied in outraged surprise. "Are you kidding?"

"Let me rephrase that," Canderous retorted, swinging up his large repeating blaster to point at the hunter threateningly. The Duros paled, and stepped away from his vehicle hurriedly.

"I must help her. I dislike him, but she spared my life," Juhani muttered incoherently, and ran towards Canderous as he jumped onto the battered speeder.

"Hey!" one of the other hunters called out in sharp surprise. "Stop, you thieving bastard!"

"Wait a minute!" I yelled angrily, running after them as Canderous turned the ignition. I felt Juhani embrace the Force; its power lending strength to her almighty leap aimed at the speeder. She landed behind Canderous with a thud, twisting her arms around him as he roared the engine into life.

"Wait for me!" a desperate shriek rose from the depths of my lungs.

One of the locals shouted in surprised anger, and I saw blaster fire ricochet off the speeder as it tore away, Canderous and Juhani disappearing quickly from my sight.

"Get back here!" I yelled furiously, hopelessly, as they vanished over the dunes. _How could they just run off without me? They will need me, surely!_

All of a sudden I was aware of the heated looks thrown my way by the hunters, who were now short two enemies to pick on.

With sinking dread creating a pit in my anger, I turned around slowly to face them.

xXx

**Calo Nord:**

She lay before me, dead to the world as I knelt in the cooling sand. _And this is what has come of the once all-powerful Darth Revan. _I could feel a victorious smirk on my face. _Not many could say they have successfully neutralized an ex-Sith Lord._

Certainly, it hadn't been easy. Of course I'd known of Bastila's quest from Darth Malak himself, and had ensured that cave was fully lined with explosives. Malak had preferred the Star Map obliterated, and it was a perfect ambush. What I hadn't expected was for their little group to split up.

_It was more satisfying this way, _I thought smugly to myself as I pulled out the neural disrupter Darth Malak had given me. _Bastila and Canderous either died in the explosion, or are busy suffocating. _In the case of my former colleague, I hoped for the latter. I knew how much his pathetic race valued an honourable death, and I had no wish to give him one.

I snapped the collar around Revan's neck, and thought idly that she appeared much younger than she had as the Dark Lord. _She's almost thirty standard years. And yet unconscious, she could be an innocent young woman. _I snorted. There was nothing innocent about Darth Revan.

_Back to business. _I stood up quickly, and surveyed her comatose companions. The sedative I'd used, Foraxyn-4, was fast-acting, but it did not linger in the system for long. The biggest threat appeared to be the Wookiee, and I strolled over to his body.

"Since I can't have you following me," I murmured, pulling out my Men'iki stealth pistol and aiming directly at his unmoving head.

A sharp burning pain stabbed into my arm, and I dropped my weapon in surprise. A loud challenging cry followed by a series of primitive honks slammed into my eardrums as I instinctively dived to the ground, rolling quickly as I drew another blaster.

_Cursed Sand People! _Just what I didn't need.

Four gaffi-wielding scum were charging right at me; presumably the blaster equipped ones were further behind. I held my weapon steady as I fired from the ground, while my other hand pulled out a thermal detonator from my belt.

I primed the grenade and lobbed it towards the oncoming mob. By the time it detonated, I was already on my feet, spraying blaster fire and sprinting for the nearest cover; one of the many twisted heaps of rubble that littered the desert around the unfortunate sandcrawler.

_How did they get here? Were they following me, or Revan? _No matter now; being the only outsider awake meant I was their immediate target.

The brief respite behind the twisted metal heap gave me time to pull out a second blaster. The natives were shouting angrily; I cocked my head and heard two survivors approaching.

_Plus four behind with blasters. Time to party. _

xXx

**Canderous Ordo:**

The wind stung my eyes as the speeder shot over the sun bleached dunes; I opened the throttle and willed the machine to go faster. The Cathar had surprised me by lurching onto the speeder and grabbing my waist fiercely; I had not expected her to willingly travel with me after the cool reception I'd been receiving all day. _No matter. As long as she can fight, she's welcome. _I had no idea of Juhani's skills; she came from a proud warrior race, yet she appeared to be one of Bastila's lackeys. _Though she did arrive with Jen, gratuitously smeared in blood. _No, not Jen. _Revan._

"I don't see them!" I turned my head and yelled hoarsely back at her; the sandcrawler ahead appeared very damaged and entirely abandoned.

"Drive around it!" Juhani screamed directly into my ear, and in retaliation I swerved the speeder sharply to the left, causing the Cathar to squawk and grip me even tighter. The sandcrawler was a monstrous machine, looming about ten metres high and at least fifty long. The bodywork had broken off the oversized machine in several places, and as I sped along the length of it, I had to dodge and swerve of numerous piles of metallic rubble. _There was a worthy battle here not too long ago._

We neared the end of the sandcrawler, and turned to follow around it. I squinted into the environs, but saw nothing of interest until we passed the final bend. Then-

_Sand People! _Firing blasters at a closer figure lurking behind a twisted metal wall that had once belonged to the sandcrawler. _I'd recognize that blue and white exoskeleton anywhere. _Calo had his back to us as he concentrated on the threat of the natives; I didn't have long to make my move. I briefly noticed the bodies of Revan and the others, flung further away to the east.

_Well, it ain't a Basilisk, but it'll do the job. _"Get ready to jump!" I yelled back at Juhani, and aimed the speeder directly at Calo's unwatching back. I dived off the hurtling speeder at the last minute, just in time to see Calo whirl around and jump aside in shock. The speeder crashed and exploded brightly into the broken metallic wall that Calo had been using as cover, but not before the bounty hunter had managed to leap from its path.

I cursed as I skidded backwards along the sand, yanking my repeating blaster up to my chest and firing rapidly in Calo's general direction. Bits of destroyed speeder flew through the stagnant air, smoke billowing from the wreck. Answering fire spat at me from several directions; I had attracted the attention of the natives.

"Take care of the Sand People!" I yelled at Juhani, who was further behind me, scrabbling to stand. "They're firing at us now!"

The Cathar ran off towards the Sand People as I leapt behind a mound of broken bodywork laying near the sandcrawler. I noted with grim approval that Juhani did not yet activate her glowing lightsaber – a sure homing beacon for anyone with a blaster on the other side of the smoke cloud.

_I should get to the crawler. It's the best cover around here. _Gaping black holes had been smashed into the side of the monstrous machine, by the looks of it somebody had fired multiple rockets at the Czerka vehicle.

"Mandalorian bastard!" Calo yelled from somewhere behind the burning wreck of the speeder. "You're old and stupid, Ordo, if you think a stunt like that would work on me!"

I leant around the bodywork briefly to fire another barrage of blasts through the explosion. I couldn't see Calo, and the smoky fire was blinding us both. I could hear shouts and challenging cries of Sand People, entirely occupied now with the Cathar. _There's a group of them, at least five. She probably won't last long._

I retreated back behind cover, alert for any noise. The jagged pile of bodywork wasn't quite large enough to hide me adequately, and I eyed up the nearby sandcrawler. "I wasn't the jackass who lined a cave with mines and expected it to take out two Jedi and a Mandalorian," I growled back at him. "I would have given you an honourable death before, Nord, but not now."

"You weak idiots and your archaic honour code," Calo sneered. I cocked my head and tried to pinpoint his exact location, yanking out a frag grenade and priming it. "Your time is gone! There is no honour in battle!"

I leapt free from the rubble, hurling the grenade in the direction of Calo's voice. Just in time to see one hurled right back at my previous position as Calo, too, jumped sideways into view. _Damn bastard thinks like me_. I landed in a crouch, immediately buffeted by shock waves of Calo's fragmentation grenade, instinctively firing my heavy blaster that was slung conveniently around my shoulder. Calo, standing some distance away, yelped in surprise as the shots hit home.

_It's gonna take more than that to drop him, _I thought hurriedly as I turned to sprint towards the sandcrawler, firing blindly over a shoulder as I ran. _He's always been fond of energy shields._

The nearest entry into the sandcrawler was a jagged hole in the steel wall, caused by some sort of heavy weaponry. I leapt into the dark interior as I felt Calo return fire, shots landing on either side of me and one thudding into the small of my back. _Garish as it is, Davik's armour does hold up well, _I thought grimly as I lurched sideways inside. I could make out vague shapes from what little daylight permeated the interior; large box-like shadows suggested I had ventured into a storage area of the monstrous machine.

"Mandalorian coward!" Calo yelled from outside; as I leaned against the outer wall I saw his blasts fire into the make-do doorway. _I'm gonna make you eat your words, scum. _In the relative safety of the crawler, I pushed a smaller crate near the opening and crouched behind it, staring directly out at the afternoon desert. The destroyed speeder was now nothing more than a faintly smoking wreck, and certainly wouldn't provide Calo with any more cover. _He won't be able to see me in here. He's dead, he just doesn't know it yet. _I couldn't spot him, but I was content to wait until he made a move. From here I calculated three particular places Calo could be hiding, still using broken parts of sandcrawler wreckage as cover.

I could spot Juhani in the distance, running towards two firing Sand People. _She's still alive? I guess that Jedi is tougher than I gave her credit for._

I hit the trigger as soon as Calo made his move, firing at him as he jumped into view, hurling a grenade directly at me. Instinctively I leapt back inside fully, dragging the crate I had been using in front of me to take whatever impact was coming. _Damn Calo and his grenades. _No explosion was forthcoming; I waited tensely but nothing happened. Other than my lungs tightening and a dizziness washing through me.

_Kath crap! Poison grenade! _The meagre light inside the crawler was turning smoky, hazy. I had to get back out, but Calo would be waiting. _If I stay inside, I'm gonna be out cold. _My head pounded, and I felt the beginnings of weakness enter my limbs.

With a snarl, I heaved the crate I'd been using back outside, diving recklessly after it into the sand. Blaster fire spat at me, most of it deflecting off the crate. I lay panting in the cooling desert, yanking my gun back up in preparation. _I have to think of something. This is gonna last forever._

"I'm not going to spend all day on worthless scum like you!" Calo yelled. _He's trying to bait me again. _Nothing for it, I had to make a lunge. I sprung out from cover, my finger numb on the trigger as I opened fire once more. Calo had found refuge again, and I spotted another grenade thrown from behind the speeder I'd decorated the desert with.

"You always were more fond of grenades than women," I grated as I rolled back behind my ad-hoc shield.

"This one's for me, not you," Calo responded, raising my alarm. _What's he up to? _I heard the recognizable 'poof' noise of a smoke grenade, and jumped out in the open again. A thick, billowing white cloud rose ahead of me, and I fired blindly through it. _Useful cover, but it's only temporary. _Indeed, the smog was already drifting upwards in the almost non-existent breeze. _Why did he need it?_

"Seems to me I've got the prize, Ordo," Calo's thick voice drawled, and I began to make out a figure through the dissipating smoke cloud. I narrowed my eyes and trained my weapon, but something odd about the outline of Calo's figure made me hold fire. "Unless you don't mind killing the very one you're trying to save."

My spine stiffened as the last remnants of fog floated away; Calo held the comatose Jen up with one hand, aiming a small blaster directly at me. _No, not Jen. Revan. _Calo was a short man, and Revan's limp body was adequate protection; unless I used a sniper rifle I couldn't be assured of hitting only Calo. _And he uses shields. I'd need a disruptor rifle, and that ain't something conveniently lying around here._

"I came here to kill you," I said flatly. "And that's a promise."

Calo laughed, and fired at my feet. "Then why aren't you shooting?" he mocked. My eyes flicked on a lone figure some distance behind Calo, a red lightsaber glinting. I took a cautious step back towards the cover I had used.

"This is between you and me, Nord. Are you too weak to fight me head-on, so pathetic you need to resort to human shields?" I challenged. Calo laughed and took a step backward, dragging Revan along. He fired a barrage of shots, and that decided me; I dived back behind the crate.

"I do whatever it takes to get the job done, Ordo! Something you never understood with your useless pride and narrow code. You can hardly call me weak – you're the one too pansy to shoot a girl," he sneered, and gave another low chuckle. I stayed silent, waiting to see what Juhani would do. "I never thought I'd see the day a Mandalorian steps down from a fight because of a hostage. You're a disgrace to your people, Ordo."

A cold, fierce anger burned low in my gut; only the Cathar's potential surprise attack kept me from charging straight out at Calo in a fury. _He's trying to get another clear shot at me, trying to lure me out. Bastard._

I heard Calo grunt in surprise and open fire; I leaned around to see Juhani sprinting towards the sandcrawler. "The Force doesn't work on me, does it, kittycat?" Calo mocked triumphantly, still firing after her. I now had a clear shot as Calo had turned to face Juhani; I fired quickly with a more precise mini-blaster I'd readied. Calo screamed as the bolts slammed into his back, but even as he fell he twisted Revan's body around to face me, returning fire and forcing me to resume my cover. _His energy shield has worn off. About time._

"Try that again and she dies!"

I shot a quick glance around the side of my cover, and noticed Calo standing upright once more. _Damn. I was hoping I'd hurt him more than that. _He started to move slowly backwards, away from the scene as he held Revan's body firmly in front of him with one hand. _He's using her as his ticket to get out of here. Like I'll let that happen. _Calo fired at me, and I ducked back behind the crate.

"You can't kill her," I sneered. "You do, and then you're dead. She's the only reason I'm not gutting you right now, the only reason you don't have the Cathar's lightsaber through your brain."

"True, I don't want to kill her. But it doesn't matter how many pieces she is in."

I heard a blaster shot, and surprise slammed into me as I looked back out at Calo. Sure enough, he had just fired point-blank into Revan's left leg. _Good thing she's out cold._

"You monster! That was unnecessary!" the Cathar's growl came from nearby; obviously she had been making her way towards me.

Calo laughed mockingly; his voice was already growing slightly more faint. _The bastard is getting away. I can't let him take Revan. _"It was completely necessary, kittycat," Calo drawled. "The more injured she is, the less trouble she'll be."

I heard a very feline hiss, and suddenly Juhani all but dived into my lap. I stared down at her in surprise as she rolled away. "And here I thought you disliked me," I commented, and sharp yellow eyes glared disgust at me. I looked Juhani over briefly; she appeared to have no major injuries. _Impressive, against five Sand People. She's not a total wet blanket after all. _

"Kittycat!" she hissed again, and I made a mental note not to call her that. _Unless I particularly want a fight. _Her eyes flashed sparks of battle rage... and something else. "No. I will control this rage. It is not the way," she muttered.

"We need a plan," I said abruptly. "I won't let Calo just walk away. Not with- not with Jen." Something stopped me saying Revan's name out loud; I pushed that odd thought away to think about later. _Curious. _

"I cannot use the Force on him! I do not understand why."

"Force resistant armour," I bit out. "Calo's exoskeleton, head-to-toe, has been interleaved with cortosis weave. I've never heard of anyone else having that sort of armour, and he paid a king's ransom for it, but it's saved his sorry arse on more than one occasion."

Juhani stared at me steadily, her lips pursed. "So the Force will not work on him. It will, however, work on Jen. Canderous, cover me." With an almost rabid snarl, Juhani lunged back out in the open.

"Mandalore's balls!" I muttered savagely, and followed her. _How am I supposed to cover her? I can't fire on Revan! _Juhani had curled into a crouching position, her hands cupped and pointing towards Calo and his hostage. I ran in front of the Cathar as Calo opened fire, placing more faith in Davik's ugly armour than I would have liked. The first shot in the chest slammed me back a pace, and knocked the wind from my lungs. _That's gonna bruise something bad._

Calo gave an abrupt yelp of startlement as Revan's limp body was suddenly yanked from his grip, to fall flat a few metres in front of him. _So that's Juhani's plan, _I thought grimly as I quickly reigned fire down on the surprised Calo, running towards him as my repeating blaster unleashed itself.

Calo fell backwards screaming as my shots tore into his chest armour. The pain must have been intense, but even intense pain didn't prevent him from pulling a second blaster and unleashing a volley of his own. _How he keeps so much weaponry on his person is beyond even me._

I rolled to the side; evading his barrage of energy bolts temporarily. _I've got to get to him before he grabs Revan again. _Even as I began another sprint, opening fire wildly, I knew I was too far away. Calo, twisting to his feet, was already scrabbling back towards Revan.

A whirling, snarling blur shot past me at high speed, lurching into the air. Juhani, moving quicker than I would have thought possible, landed directly before Calo. He aimed both pistols in the direction of Juhani's onslaught, but fast as he was, Calo never pulled the trigger.

Her lightsaber cleaved cleanly through his head and into his chest.

I stopped my obsolete sprint, and stood panting. The surroundings could now almost pass for the Tarisian Lower City, cluttered with multiple bodies and smoking wreckage. My eyes caught on a few Gamorrean corpses. _He hired Gamorreans? _Odd, but I bypassed worrying about it.

I noticed absently that the light was fading quickly; the sun was merely a winking jewel on the horizon. Revan lay face-down a few metres away; Juhani was walking back towards me from Calo's bloody corpse. I felt a growing respect for the Cathar; she had surprised me with her warrior skills. _We made a good team_. I nodded at her in comradeship, and she stared back at me solemnly.

"What do you think knocked them out?" Juhani asked softly as we both knelt down by Revan. Blood trickled through the cracks of the armour sheathing her leg, and threadbare patches on her left arm revealing swollen bruised skin hinted at further damage.

"Some sort of sedative. Won't be life-threatening; Calo wanted her alive," I stated. "I'm gonna check out Calo's corpse."

A few minutes later, I had my answer. "Foraxyn-4," I told Juhani. "Expensive stuff, but Calo always had credits backing him. One of the quickest acting sedatives in the Core Worlds; the fact that it's not deadly means the demand isn't that high for it. It wears off in an hour or two, but adrenastims nicely speed up the recovery."

Now the fight was over, I was feeling rather angry at myself. I'd thrown my last grenade at Calo, and my meagre arsenal of weapons had left me at a disadvantage. _Before we get off this rock, I'm gonna suit up._

Happily, stims I had in plentiful supply.

xXx

**Mission Vao:**

"(No. I absolutely forbid it!)" Zaerdra stormed at me, waggling an admonishing finger. I scowled angrily, but for some reason my heart wasn't in it. I felt positively sad at seeing her again. The fact that she was wearing that dull brown robe Bastila had picked up from some merchant to look like a snooty Jedi was also puzzling.

"I do what I want!" I retorted.

Zaerdra's face flushed with anger, and she opened her mouth to yell once more. "Wakey wakey kid," she said in Basic, and in Canderous' deep, gravely voice.

I blinked, and Gadon's hall dissolved around me. _Huh? _Zaerdra gave me an odd pleading look, and then vanished. _Hang on, this ain't real._

"I'm not a kid!" I tried to yell, but it came out as more of a whimper. I heard a derisive male chuckle, and consciousness slammed into me, along with a variety of aches and bruises.

I prised open my eyes hesitantly. Canderous was getting to his feet, while I lay on my back, staring up at the vast night sky. It was early evening, and the last whispers of sunset were being chased away as the first stars winked down at me. Two moons lay heavy on the horizon. I tilted my head slightly and saw a large shadow to the side; the sandcrawler we had stopped by earlier. _But it's night time now._

"Ugh, what happened?" I moaned, struggling to sit up. _Someone attacked us! _My hand flew to my shoulder where a dart had pierced earlier. Jen was grunting in pain, and I turned my head sharply to see Juhani leaning over her. _Juhani and Canderous? What are they doing here?_ The Mandalorian had moved to crouch down next to Zaalbar.

"Big Z!" I cried, scrabbling towards him. "What are you doing?" I demanded as Canderous pulled out a hypodermic needle.

"Waking him up," he told me flatly.

"Sithspit," Jen moaned nearby. "Tell me I've got a hangover, and that Calo Nord didn't just succeed in putting a neural disruptor around my neck."

_Calo Nord? The ruthless bounty hunter? _Juhani murmured something I couldn't catch, and I noticed a shiny metallic collar in the Cathar's hands. "What's been going on?" I asked loudly as my confusion grew.

Jen turned to look at me, giving me a weak, drained smile. "Calo Nord ambushed us. Juhani and Canderous to the rescue."

I blinked; Canderous had his back turned but Juhani was appraising me with her weird, golden eyes. Her presence made me uneasy; I didn't really know anything about her except that she'd tried to murder us all only a few days ago. _Jen seems to think she's harmless enough. I guess that means she's okay._

Zaalbar gave a sudden roar, jerking upwards abruptly. Canderous, for all his strength and bravado, wasn't slow to move away. "Big Z!" I called, and Zaalbar turned to face me.

"(Mission! Are you alright? Jen?)"

"I'm fine," I stood up slowly, and walked towards him. My legs stung from the Gamorrean's grenade, and I longed for some healing salve. _Even the gunk they put in the budget medpacs would do._

"You're arm is badly fractured," Juhani told Jen softly in her lilting voice. "The bone is well out of alignment, almost as if you fell on it after the injury. I can sense it, but I have not used the healing side of the Force in a very long time. Perhaps Bastila could help."

"Where is she, anyway?"

I wondered whether the Cathar was flushing in embarrassment; it was hard to tell in the fading light. "Back at Anchorhead. I do hope we didn't leave her in trouble."

"I'm sure the princess is more than capable of charming those jerks," Canderous grated from next to Carth's body.

I didn't particularly care where that Jedi snot was, but... _Griff! _"Where is he?" I shrieked suddenly, causing Juhani to jump and Canderous to turn around quickly. "Where's Griff?"

"Who?" Canderous snapped in irritation.

"My brother! A Twi'lek, just like me! He would have been around here too!" I said frantically, and noticed that Zaalbar did not meet my eyes.

"Well I see dead Sand People, dead Gamorreans and a dead human," Canderous drawled. "A regular meat market around here. But no dead Twi'lek."

"I saw him run," Jen said flatly, and I whipped around to stare at her. She was hunched over on the sand, her good arm clutching a leg. Her face was closed, impassive, but her eyes seemed to hold sympathy. "He escaped when Calo ambushed us. He probably made it to safety."

I could feel my lower lip trembling, and bit down on it hard. "He ran," I whispered, blinking hurriedly. An inner rage bubbled inside me suddenly. "He ran! Just like before! What sort of brother is he!"

"(I am sorry,)" Zaalbar rumbled softly, standing and walking towards me. He placed a furry hand on my arm, but I jerked it away abruptly. _I don't need pity! He's a jerk! ...he always was. _I sniffed, and sat down abruptly, clutching my knees and ignoring the burning protests of my damaged skin.

"Uh... what's going on?" Carth groaned as he came to, reaching for his blaster instinctively.

"Don't start a fight unless you mean to end it," Canderous warned tautly, and the Republic pilot dropped his hand.

"_Canderous?_ What happened?"

"I'm getting sick of that question," Canderous growled as he moved away. "We should get out of here before more Sand People arrive."

"Sand People?" Carth questioned sharply.

"A group of them attacked the bounty hunter as we arrived on the scene," Juhani responded in a quiet voice.

"Hrm. They were probably following us, after the mess we made of their base," Jen surmised.

"All the more reason to get back to civilization," Canderous grunted. "I don't think the rest of you are up to any more action. I wouldn't mind a cold beer myself."

"For once, I have to agree with you," Carth commented wryly as he stood. The Mandalorian walked over to Jen and gave her a hand up. She stifled a noise of pain and leaned on her good leg. _Sheesh, she's pretty badly beaten up. _Concern for Jen briefly filtered through my own misery.

Canderous stared Jen directly in the eyes. "You were lucky those Sand People came when they did. If they hadn't halted Calo, he'd be long gone by now. With you."

"There is no luck," a crisp, annoyed voice floated through the semi-darkness. "There is only the Force."

"Oh great," I complained under my breath. Just about the last person I wanted to see, after my scumbag brother.

"So nice of you to join us, princess."

Bastila walked towards us, her face about the same temperature as Hoth. "How considerate of you to leave me there, Canderous."

The Mandalorian shrugged. "I figured you could get your own speeder if you wanted to."

"You figured wrong," she lashed back. "I walked here. It took all my efforts to stop the hunters from attacking me."

"Give over already," Carth intervened in a weary voice. "Let's just get back."

"I do not think Jen will be able to walk," Juhani said softly. Bastila frowned and walked towards her, and even in the dim moonlight I couldn't miss the look of wary mistrust that tightened Jen's face.

I sighed and turned away, staring blindly up at the stars. _Griff, how could you? _Twice he had left me to die. _I guess that proves he only cares about himself. _Why did it hurt so much?

Zaalbar had come to sit next to me; offering no words but a steady, silent comfort. I leaned against him wearily and wondered if I would ever see my brother again. If I ever wanted to.

"Your leg should be alright to walk on now," Bastila's voice had turned expressionless. "I cannot do anything for your arm until we get back. I will need Juhani's help."

"Of course," Juhani murmured.

Jen hobbled slightly, and then steadied herself, nodding briefly at Bastila but offering no words of thanks. Even wrapped up in my own thoughts, I could still sense the tense undercurrents between the two women. _Well, Bastila is such a prissy, uptight cow. _

I turned to watch as Jen walked towards Calo's corpse, stopping to kick it hard in a very undignified place. Carth winced, and I almost felt like giggling.

"Was that entirely necessary?" Carth snapped, and Jen smirked at him.

"Yes. Very necessary." She went to fold her arms, and then moaned in discomfort at the movement.

"Wait a minute," Carth ordered, and walked over to kneel down by Calo's body. He then proceeded to remove Calo's armour, followed by his outer clothing. _What is he doing? _Canderous walked forward quickly to pick up the armour.

"I'm not sure if I want to watch this," Jen quipped, eyeing over Carth's ministrations of the body. "Didn't know your tastes ran that way, flyboy."

"Ha ha," Carth said coldly, ripping the clothing into a more manageable size. "Here. Hold still." Jen actually held her tongue while Carth tied a makeshift sling around her neck. _Hah. And here I thought he didn't like her._

"Thanks," she replied in a low tone.

"Uh, no problem," Carth muttered.

"Enough of this," Bastila cut in imperiously. "Let us get moving."

"I'm fixing HK first," Jen stated in a low tone that brooked no argument.

Bastila expelled an uptight breath in annoyance. "Can you not just carry it? Or perhaps ask Zaalbar?"

"(I can carry him for you, Jen Sahara,)" Zaalbar called from next to me.

"We should find Calo's speeder," Canderous remarked. "He'll have left one around nearby. How else was he planning to leave?"

"It's too dark to find the speeder, and we could not fit everybody on it. No, we should all depart now, on foot," Bastila said briskly, motioning us all to start moving. I stuck my tongue out at her, and caught a look of pure hate on Jen's face as she also glared at Bastila.

Canderous laughed. "Y'know, princess, you're almost cute when you try to be leader."

"Very funny," Bastila snapped.

Carth, finally, called an end to the bickering by sighing and starting the journey back. Zaalbar picked up the dead robot with a grunt, and then waited for me to begin walking. We trudged slowly through the desert in silence, with the others behind us. Bastila and Canderous continued trading insults, until the prissy Jedi retreated into a stony silence. Juhani and Jen were murmuring quietly to each other.

I could hear insects chirping in the distance, and the eerie darkness pulled at me from all directions. _I've never been out in the wilderness at night before. It's a lot different from the Undercity; it's a big emptiness all around me. _I hoped Griff got lost and was still wandering aimlessly. _No, it's not like I want him dead. _Not dead... but... _I don't know what I want._

"I'm sorry," Carth said awkwardly; I hadn't noticed him slow down to walk abreast of me and Zaalbar. I scowled and bowed my head.

"It doesn't matter," I muttered. "I always knew he was slime."

"I-I guess he was just scared," Carth's response sounded weak, even to my ears.

"Yeah. Scared enough to leave his sister to die. Twice in one day." My mouth felt dry, sour, like I'd just downed a glass of vinegar. "What does it matter? I've still got Big Z. And- and Jen, I guess."

"It still does matter. Betrayal," Carth's voice was quiet, and yet harsh at the same time. "Stays with you for a lifetime." He gave a bitter laugh, and I turned to look at him curiously.

_He sounds like he's been burnt. _"What happened?" I asked softly.

He sighed, and looked as though he wished he hadn't brought it up. "My father died when I was very young," he said flatly. "There was a man, who mentored me when I joined the Republic. He was everything my father was not; intelligent, strong, charismatic. He moulded me into the officer I am today. I grew to care for him more than I ever did my father," Carth trailed off, and sympathy swirled within me. _I guess I'm not the only one with problems._

"And?" I asked, interested to know more. Carth didn't usually open up like this; I guessed he was doing so out of pity for me. I didn't like the reason, but couldn't contain my curiosity.

"He turned traitor and joined the Sith army. Spilt the secrets of the Republic, and commandeered attacks that killed millions of innocent people. All for his own ambition." Carth's tone turned harsh, and I knew instinctively he would say no more. I glanced behind me, and saw Jen trailing us closely. Her eyes had been intent on Carth's back, but flicked to mine. She grimaced.

We walked the rest of the way in relative quiet, apart from the occasional grunts of Zaalbar carrying his heavy load. The quiet blackness seemed to reach out with a many-fingered hand and grip us all with an ominous silence. By the time we reached the looming gates of Anchorhead, I was more than ready to get back to the Ebon Hawk. _I just want to curl up, and pretend today never happened._

Our only interruption was on the strangely empty dirt road of Anchorhead, when a lone stranger approached Jen and forced something into her hand. Carth, followed by Bastila, immediately demanded to know what it was, but Jen just shrugged them off and strode away.

I grinned slightly as she stormed off. _She'll tell me. I'll bug her tomorrow about it... for now I just want some sleep._

xXx

**Eridius Talav – Second Overseer of the Genoharadan:**

Shadows flickered like fleeing ghosts across the walls as one candle spluttered its dying breath. I always preferred working in this archaic light; it somehow increased the mystery and darkness that my job entailed. Not one of my minions could enter this room - my master study - without feeling at a loss as I faced them behind an imposing mahogany desk littered with burning candles.

I wrenched my concentration back to the latest report; from a current agent high in the ranks of the Republic Navy. Soon I was consumed, but a brief knock interrupted my reverie.

"Enter," I intoned in as deep a voice as manageable. First impressions of any encounter were always crucial; I had learned long ago what a powerful tool intimidation could be.

Spymaster Gaalin, one of our most intelligent agents, entered silently. His skills were not of the ordinary assassin employed within our organization; rather his sharp mind and ability to interpret patterns of behaviour and make sense of seemingly irrational politics made him an invaluable asset.

He inclined his head slightly, a measure of respect. "We've had a job offer I think you should look over, Eridius," he said softly, his grey eyes meeting mine steadily in the dim light.

I raised my eyebrows; most assassination requests went no further than the spymasters. I had not personally approved one in almost half a year. I motioned for him to continue.

"This comes directly from Darth Malak," he stated baldly.

My brow shot up further. That the Sith knew of our existence did not surprise me; that they knew how to approach us was not startling. That their lord contacted us directly was... unsettling. From the depths of the shadows was where the Genoharadan worked best; direct communication from a person as powerful and destructive as Darth Malak was not in our best interests. Particularly seeing as our web of information and agents was more firmly planted in the Republic; it was in the Genoharadan's best interest to see _them_ win the war, not the Sith.

"And what is his... request?" From what I knew of Darth Malak, he preferred commands to requests.

"He wants us to hit two targets. Two individual contracts, Eridius, both worth... well, look for yourself."

I took the proffered datapad, where the communications had been downloaded. The first sum of credits was enough for me to do a double-take, as I checked it out again. _Surely this is incorrect... how can the Sith have this sort of money? _Their fleet had expanded immeasurably in the last year; although we had not successfully concluded how their army had grown so strong, I could only assume that their pool of material resources must be wearing thin by now.

The name of the hit was unfamiliar; another surprise. _I would have presumed that someone commanding this sort of price would be well known. _I flicked briefly over to the next contract. The same gross figure glared at me baldly, but this time I recognized the name.

I stayed silent for a few minutes, possibilities whirring through my mind. _Our coffers have been running emptier than usual lately. _War was generally good for the Genoharadan, but not when we had a vested interest in seeing the weaker side win. Particularly when more contracts appeared from the stronger side. _We are too well set up with the Republic to walk away without a fight. But we fight from the shadows - so if the Sith do win, we can still prevail._

Eventually I sighed, and placed the datapad down. "We cannot take the contract up on Bastila Shan, Gaalin. As tempting as it is, it would put our organization in jeopardy."

"I thought as much. Targeting a Jedi hero is too risky," Gaalin agreed grimly.

I nodded. "We have managed to stay relatively unknown from the Jedi Order, though I doubt they are unaware of our existence. If we showed our hand like this..."

"They would be forced to act," Gaalin finished. "Not to mention the reaction of Republic HQ, should their hero fall to our hand."

"Yes," I concluded. We were tolerated – barely – by the few high-ranking Republic officials who knew of our existence. Considering the Battle Meditation talent of Jedi Shan, and her part in Darth Revan's downfall, I doubted they would stay silent should they suspect our involvement.

"If we could succeed while casting blame on the Sith..." I mused softly. "But even then, the continued life of Jedi Shan is to the Republic's advantage, and hence ours. No, despite the remuneration involved, I am afraid we must refuse. Politely, of course."

"As to the other?" Gaalin inquired.

I frowned, picking up the datapad to peruse it once more. "Who is this Jen Sahara?"

"She is a current companion of Jedi Shan, one of the few survivors from the Sith attack upon the Endar Spire. There are many strange things about her, though; many inconsistencies..."

"Such as?" I prompted impatiently. Gaalin had an irritating tendency to trail off into deep thought; a trait I shared but did not tolerate in others.

"We have traced her as a scholar from Deralia, taken captive when Darth Revan invaded the planet. You know of the trap there that Revan narrowly avoided; and the ensuing counter strike lead by Jedi and Deralian troops. Jen Sahara was rescued during that offensive, but our reports suggest she was too badly wounded to recover."

"Yet she obviously did. Jedi healing techniques are unarguably the most effective in the galaxy."

"True," Gaalin conceded, but he did not look entirely convinced.

"You believe Jen Sahara died then? That this is an impostor?" I had learnt to not doubt Gaalin's hunches; they were more often accurate than not.

Gaalin shifted uneasily. "I am uncertain, Eridius. Our intelligence informs us that Jen Sahara was employed by the Jedi Council to help investigate archaic Force ruins." He sighed. "If only we had a Jedi spy."

I smiled briefly at his annoyance; Gaalin's pet peeve was his inability to infiltrate the ranks of the Jedi. "One would think the Jedi would not need any help with Force-sensitive ruins."

"Exactly," Gaalin agreed. "I have also heard disturbing reports – not from our more reliable sources, mind you – that this Jen Sahara can use the Force herself."

"Another Jedi," I said flatly. I wasn't surprised; I doubted Darth Malak would offer such a sum for someone who wasn't vastly powerful.

"No," he contradicted me. "She does not appear at all in any of the Jedi annals; she is not registered as a Jedi under that name. I cannot find any further connections, so now I am looking for other names matching her description."

"If she was onboard the Endar Spire... do you think this Jen Sahara could have been involved with the Sith attack?"

"Nothing to suggest it, although I have looked. The only connection I have made with the Sith attack so far is the defection of Jedi Kylah Aramai to the Sith."

I nodded briskly, and handed the datapad back to Gaalin. "Well, we need the credits. If this Jen Sahara is not a well-known asset to the Republic, then take her out. Demand half payment in advance; Darth Malak would surely not expect anything else."

I waved Gaalin out, but he hesitated at the door. "Yes?" I snapped, eager to get back to my original work.

"There is one more thing... which may work in our favour. Jen Sahara has recently been approached by one of our agents. To work for us."

I blinked in surprise. "Oh? Why?"

"She has been watched since Taris, and her abilities have been... admirable. She has also evaded assassination by Calo Nord twice, and either her or her companions have finally ended the bounty hunter's life."

I paused briefly. "That is impressive. Though if she is a Force-user, it may not be all too surprising. What is her point of contact?"

"Hulas on Manaan."

I grimaced. _Cursed pacifistic planet. _It certainly wasn't impossible to complete contracts on Manaan, but it _was_ more difficult. On the other hand, the forced neutrality of the place allowed a convenient hiding spot for any hot agents. Personally, I hated the place, the Selkath gave me the creeps.

"If she reaches Hulas, try to get her off Manaan and away from the Republic. Regardless, this can only work to our advantage."

Gaalin nodded curtly, and left me to my reading.

xXx

**Zaalbar:**

I escaped the Ebon Hawk quickly, trying not to look too eager. The tension between the Jedi Bastila and Jen Sahara was making me uneasy; their arguments last night were only overshadowed by the heated conflict this morning. _They are like two cubs vying for status, both trying to be the most popular. _Bastila, in particular, wanted to be the leader, and had tried to convince them all to leave Tatooine early this morning.

Jen, however, had other ideas. _I follow Jen, as worrisome as she may be. _She was striding ahead of me now, talking to that Mandalorian warrior, the early morning sun glinting off her dark curls. Her cries last night as Jedi Bastila and the Cathar Juhani fixed her arm had set my teeth on edge; I had requested to help them but was shooed away. _Her arm will trouble her for some time still. _She still wore it in a sling, and Bastila had warned her to take it easy for the next few weeks. _Kolto and Force healing only do so much, Bastila said. _To which Jen had promptly turned her back and stalked out of the room.

I sighed; I did not understand women. _They do not act like women; they act like children. Like cubs who have not been properly disciplined. _Not a thought I would share out loud. _Humans are so reckless, so impatient. _My eyes slid on Mission, who was walking silently next to me. _As are Twi'leks._

We were heading towards the Ithorian's droid repair shop; Jen hoped to find enough repair parts for her robot, while Mission wanted to escape the confines of the Ebon Hawk. Why the Mandalorian was coming along I did not know, he seemed to be particularly receptive to Jen ever since the rescue yesterday.

The sand crunched underneath my feet as I walked through the small settlement; a merchant nearby was busily saddling his pack of rontos ready for the day's customers. To the right a group of swoop bike mechanics were tinkering with their bikes, and I was reminded of the engineering crew back at the Hidden Bek base. Mission looked their way longingly.

"Aww, I never got a chance to go swoop racing. I wonder if there's a track on Manaan."

"Of course there is, kid." The Mandalorian overheard and threw the remark over his shoulder.

"Stop calling me a kid, you old fart!" Mission snapped. Canderous stopped, and turned around slowly. I tensed, and eyed him over warily. A nearby stall merchant ceased flicking through his wares and peered nervously at us.

"You'd think you guys had enough fighting yesterday," Jen said dryly as she turned around. "Play nice, okay?"

"Play?" Canderous drawled derisively, cocking an eyebrow at her.

"Look, you hurt Mission and you'll have a ten ton Wookiee after you." She paused, and then added, "and me, too. You both have names. Try using them?"

"Geez, you're a fine one to talk, Jen. I've lost count of different names you have for Carth," Mission interjected sulkily. "Flyboy, Onasi, Republic, that one HK uses, Blaster Boy-"

"Blaster Boy?" Canderous guffawed. "I'll have to remember that one."

"(Shall we get going?)" I suggested impatiently, a growl of hunger echoing loudly from my stomach.

Mission turned, and laughed at me. "You just want us to hurry up so you can get something to eat."

"(I only had a small breakfast, Mission,)" I said plaintively.

Jen grinned, and resumed walking. The merchant whose attention we had attracted lost interest, and turned back to his lone customer.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. If you don't get your eight square meals a day you get grumpy." Mission punched me lightly, and I growled again. A local walking next to us jumped at the sound and walked away hurriedly; I felt somewhat abashed. _I do not like being around this many people. _It wasn't anywhere near as bad as Taris; which had been a decaying, overpopulated capital city. _At least here I can see the sky, and less of civilization. _But it was nothing like home; this place was a barren wasteland of sand edging out in all directions, rather than the thick, comforting presence of century-old trees. Even after all these years, I still considered Kashyyyk my home. I supposed I always would.

"What was that thing you got last night, Jen?" Mission piped up. I wondered briefly what my young charge was talking about now.

"Thing? What thing?" Jen slowed down, and Mission skipped to catch up to her.

"Y'know, that man who stopped you last night. What did he give you?"

"Oh! A datapad. It was broken, though, and it wasn't mine. Guess the guy was confused," Jen said smoothly, but I wondered if her posture had tensed while answering. _She smells uneasy. But why would she lie?_ Maybe I was just being suspicious.

"Oh." Mission's headtails drooped in disappointment. "I was hoping it'd be something interesting, like- I dunno, some adventure or something."

"Adventure? Haven't we already had enough of that?" Jen muttered darkly.

"No, I mean a _real_ adventure. Where you get to go visit strange places..." Mission looked around herself, in a foreign land, and bit her lip suddenly. "Well, one where no one dies, anyway."

Jen grinned, and grabbed Mission's hand impulsively as we stopped outside a smaller clay building. "Well, here's Yuka Laka's shop. Let's see what adventure we can find in here."

"Don't make fun of me!" Mission exclaimed, but let herself get dragged in anyway. Canderous rolled his eyes mockingly, and followed them. My stomach growled yet again. _I could leave them here, and go buy some food. _I looked back at a stall offering fresh dewback meat; although its purpose was for hunters to bait traps, it looked quite delectable from where I was standing.

"Big Z!" Mission called from inside the shop. "Stop dawdling!"

I sighed, pushed aside my hunger for the time being, and walked inside.

xXx

**Carth Onasi:**

The Ebon Hawk sailed smoothly into the Tatooine sky, and I felt a perceptible loosening of my shoulders. I'd sent an encrypted message to the Republic base leader on Manaan before take-off, and I was confident of a warm reception there. _I wonder if it's still Roland Wann in charge. _A smarmy, officious man; he was not someone I had warmed to. He'd always been a little too quick to look out for his own interests. _Doesn't matter. Soon we'll be back amongst allies._

Things had been tense for too long, and only here, in the cockpit seat, did I really feel at ease. _I'd feel more comfortable if Jen wasn't watching me so intently. _

As we'd launched off, Jen had sailed into the room and launched herself into the co-pilot's chair. I'd known what was going to happen and groaned inwardly; sure enough, Bastila arrived a minute later asking ever-so-politely if Jen would mind moving. _May as well ask for it to snow in Anchorhead, Bastila. _She'd ended up walking away in an icy rage.

"You could try being a bit nicer to Bastila," I said mildly, and immediately regretted it. Jen smirked at me, her eyes twinkling. At times like this, I wondered if I was dreaming about the changes in her. She was behaving just as annoying, mouthy and quick-witted as back on Taris. At other times..._ at other times she seems almost sadistic._

"Why would I do that?" she asked lightly, still grinning at me.

"Because.. because..." I floundered. I didn't particularly _like_ Bastila myself, but still... "Because she doesn't exactly have many friends on board," I snapped. _While you have a Wookiee and a Twi'lek urchin following you blindly. _And ever since the rescue yesterday, Canderous had been treating Jen with respect, almost deference - which was odd in the extreme. _Even Juhani, who barely speaks to anyone, talks freely to Jen. _I sighed. _Is everyone around here crazy? What is so special about that damn woman? _I glared at her in frustration; she was still grinning at me, damn her.

"So, you gonna tell me his name?" she asked idly, but her voice had turned serious.

"Huh?" I stared in confusion at the abrupt topic change, wondering what she was rabbiting on about now.

"I heard you, talking with Mission last night. Who were you talking about?"

"None of your business," I said tightly, turning my attention back to the controls. _I should have known Jen was listening in. She and Mission are as nosey as each other. _I hadn't meant to talk about my past, but I'd hated to see that miserable, disillusioned look on the Twi'lek's face. _Damn._

"Fine. I'll get it out of you, you know," she responded mildly.

"Drop it." My voice had turned flat and angry, and I fiddled with the readout dials for no reason other than to keep my hands busy, and my eyes away from her. As the skies darkened into space, the silence stretched between us. I risked a glance, certain that the familiar fury would be flashing in her eyes.

She was staring intently, almost dazedly, at the controls. _Every time I think I'm beginning to predict her, she goes and acts weird on me. Damn woman. _I scowled, and checked the coordinates for the hyperspace jump. As I punched them in and readied the ship, I could feel Jen's eyes resting on me. I muttered under my breath, and flicked on the internal communications.

"Prepare for the hyperspace jump," I warned the crew as my hand rested on the lever. The familiar dizziness clenched my stomach as we made the jump. _Funny. You'd think after all this time I'd be used to it. _A momentary nausea was nothing to worry about. I'd heard of people who spent days hurling up the contents of their stomach.

Jen was still staring vaguely at the controls.

"What?" I snapped finally, feeling uncomfortable.

"I... I've piloted before," she mumbled. "I'm sure of it."

"Piloted before?" I echoed disbelievingly. "Right." I didn't know what to believe anymore. "Just who are you? Supposedly a scholar who can use the Force, pick locks almost as well as Mission, speak more languages than your average Jedi, one of the – no, _the_ craziest melee warrior I've even had the misfortune to meet, and now you think you can pilot. Is there anything you can't do?"

She glanced up at me again, and damn if she wasn't laughing. _Why does she find everything funny? I suppose it's better than her getting psychotically angry again. _I felt my expression grow even darker, and she snickered. "I always knew you had a high opinion of me underneath all those scowls, Onasi," she quipped, mischief dancing in her eyes.

"You are so infuriating!" the words wrenched out of me in irritation, but she merely grinned.

"I'll leave you and your bad mood alone then," she said, standing up and departing. "I'm off to fix HK."

I sighed in annoyance as she left. For some reason, I didn't feel any happier being alone.

_Well, we'll be on Manaan soon. Things will calm down; I'll be able to find out what's going on. _The pleasing thing about Manaan was the forced lack of overt violence. I was sick of Jen rushing crazily into battle, and killing everything in her way.

Was that a fair judgment? I'd never seen Jen hurt an innocent. And I'd met plenty of other berserkers before who were good law-abiding people; they just erupted with the same senseless rage and adrenalin in battle that Jen did. _But never a berserking Jedi. Aren't emotions like that meant to be dangerous for a Jedi? _

But she wasn't a Jedi, was she? _No, just someone who's suddenly using the Force and claiming that she can't remember her past. Does she really expect me to believe that? _

I needed some answers. Bastila was still being as evasive as a spice smuggling spacer, and I no longer knew why I was following her so faithfully. _Because I was assigned to this mission. This may be the most crucial task in the war; it could turn the tide for the Republic. _But damn it, when was someone going to explain things to me?

At least we were headed to Manaan next. I knew a fair amount of officers stationed in the Republic base there, and I would be able to check in with HQ, and maybe look a few things up. _If Bastila wants my assistance any further, she will have to give me some real answers. _Like who Jen Sahara really was. And exactly what significance these mysterious Force ruins had.

I scowled angrily to myself. _Why am I always left out of the loop? _

Manaan. I'd get some answers on Manaan, damn it.

xXx

**Karon Enova:**

I sighed softly, staring out through the cockpit window at the blue skies of Rii'shn, a small peaceful planet I'd brought my apprentice along for a little adventure. Our business was now wrapped up, and my thoughts dragged back to a conversation I'd had merely ten hours ago.

I'd known, one way or another, that the past would come back to haunt me once more, or to drag me back into its murky grip... I may have prepared for it, but I didn't feel ready. _Here I am, a master for the last ten years, having doubts and fears like a Padawan. _

"Master?" a young male voice queried behind me. I schooled my expression and turned around in the pilot's chair, smiling briefly at Lars. After my shattering failure with Revan, I'd vowed never to take an apprentice again. _Look at me now. _

Lars had been with the Jedi Order for eight years already, and would soon be preparing for his trials to become a fully fledged Padawan. His original master, my old friend Tyrias, had been one of the many casualties of my former apprentice, and perhaps my guilt was the reason I had finally agreed to mentor Lars.

"Apprentice," I said quietly. "Everything loaded onto the ship?"

"Yes. We're ready to leave. Are we heading back to Coruscant?" he asked brightly. There was something almost dreamy about Lars; at times I'd wondered whether he'd ever been touched by tragedy in his life. He hadn't held a particularly close relationship with Tyrias, so had not felt much pain when Tyrias joined the Force. _That is what I see on the outside. I should not judge what goes on inside Lars' mind. _And yet I worried for the day that Lars would finally feel the grief of losing a loved one, or the pain of betrayal. He was not particularly close to any of the apprentices back on Coruscant, despite his happy, ambivalent nature. _Others do not warm to him because he's always dreaming, always lost inside his own head. He should have been an artist, not a Jedi._

I smiled at Lars, and motioned him forward. "No. We are heading to Manaan first."

xXx

**HK-47**

Start-up System Check  
Motoring Functions Online  
Memory Core Function... Unable To Access

Audio Sensors ... Online  
Optical Sensors ... Online  
Tactile Sensors ... Online  
Olfactory Sensors ... Online  
Gustatory Sensors ... Not Installed

Shielding Function ... Error  
... Energy Shields ... 20.38472 percent Capability  
... Sonic Shields ... 19.34266 percent Capability  
... Electrical Shields ... Offline

Scanning External Environment

Location: Ebon Hawk Engineering Section

3 Organic Meatbags, 1 Droid in Targeting Area

Identification – Jen Sahara (Current Owner), Mission Vao, Zaalbar

Optical Sensors Focusing on Droid

Analysis: Unknown Droid  
Model: T3 Series, Droid  
Model Recognition Result: Negative  
Threat Assessment: Minimal  
Assigned Temporary Name: Mobile Trash Can

Input – Jen Sahara: "What's your status, HK?"

Output: "Response: It appears that the damage to my primary motor functions has been corrected. My electrical shields are completely destroyed, master. My sonic and energy shields are down to twenty percent capability."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Good. Zaalbar, help me back here? I want to take a look at the shield controls."

Intrusion Detected: Rear Panel Opening  
Threat Assessment: Negative

Input – Jen Sahara: "HK, think we could take a look at your memory core while we are at it?"

Output: "Response: You will need to access my central control cluster to do so, master. My own internal diagnostic checks have failed to discover the source of this error. Cautionary: This may take some skill. Please be careful with my circuits."

Input – Zaalbar _(Shyriiwook)_: "The power supply to electrical shields is completely destroyed. See here? It is good we bought a new one. Shall I install it for you, Jen?"

Input – Jen Sahara: "Please."

Removal of Non Functional Electrical Shield Power Supply Detected  
Installation of Functional Electrical Shield Power Supply Detected

Input – Jen Sahara: "Alright, HK, I'm activating the electrical shields."

Electrical Shields Powering Up  
Shields Diagnostic  
Shielding Function... Error  
... Energy Shields... 20.38472 percent Capability  
... Sonic Shields... 19.34266 percent Capability  
... Electrical Shields... 100 percent Capability

Output: "Statement: My electrical shields have been fully restored, master. That was a good effort for a hairy overgrown meatbag."

Input – Zaalbar: _(Irritated Howl)_

Input – Jen Sahara: "Why do you call everyone meatbags, HK?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Amused

Output: "Explanation: It's just that... you have all these squishy meat parts, master. And all that water! How the constant sloshing doesn't drive you mad, I have no idea."

Input – Mission Vao: "Squishy meat parts? Sheesh, you could at least be polite, y'know."

Output: "Query: Perhaps you would prefer the term liquidious fleshbag?"

Input – Mission Vao: "Oh, shut up. Hey, I wonder what this does."

Input – Zaalbar to Mission Vao _(Shyriiwook)_: "No! Mission, not that wire!"

Visual Input: Blue  
Optical Sensors Overload

Input – Mission Vao: "Uh, oops."

Activating Self Preservation Protocols...  
Adjusting Targeting System to Audio Triangulation  
Searching For Weapon...  
Motor Function Error  
Light Impact Detected – Location: Left Optical Socket  
Source: HK-47

Output: "Exclamation: Ow! I am poking my own eye sockets! Ow! What has she done to me!"

Input – Jen Sahara: "Zaalbar, quick, deactivate him!"

Power Lost

_.../some time later/..._

Startup System Check  
Motoring Functions Online  
Memory Core Function... Unable To Access

Audio Sensors ... Online  
Optical Sensors ... Online  
Tactile Sensors ... Online  
Olfactory Sensors ... Online  
Gustatory Sensors ... Not Installed

Shielding Function ... Online  
... Energy Shields ... 100 Capability  
... Sonic Shields ... 100 Capability  
... Electrical Shields ... 100 Capability

Scanning External Environment

Location: Ebon Hawk Engineering Section

3 Organic Meatbags in Targeting Area

Identification – Jen Sahara (Current Owner), Zaalbar, Canderous Ordo

Input – Jen Sahara: "HK? You alright now?"

Output: "Response: I am fully func..zzz"

Audio Transmission Error  
Motor Function Error  
Internal Diagnostic check:  
... Limbs Non Functional

Input – Zaalbar: _(Howl)_

Moderate Impact Detected – Location: Rear Panel  
Source: Zaalbar  
Combat Mode Initiated:  
Interrupt:  
...Motor Functions Powering Up... 100 Online  
...Audio Transmission Powering Up... 100 Online  
Return to Main  
Exiting Combat Mode

Output: "Response: I seem to be back online, Master."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Right. Uh, let's take a break before we install that mod you bought for him, Canderous."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Weary

Input – Canderous Ordo: "Might be a good idea to keep the kid away from here."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Switch to standby, HK. We'll do the rest later."

Output: "As you desire, master. Signing off."

Entertainment Routine Initiated:

Target Analysis:  
Type: Organic Meatbag  
Species: Twi'lek, Female  
Name: Mission Vao  
Occupation: Insignificant Member of the Ebon Hawk Crew

Death Scenario: Blaster Shot to Head...

xXx

**Juhani**

"Juhani. We should talk," Revan said intently, her eyes piercing into mine as she slouched in the doorframe. Ever since I had learned the truth, I did not want to leave her side. I could sense a dark taint struggling to take root in her body, and her struggle was so similar to mine that I wanted to weep.

The Ebon Hawk had lifted into hyperspace hours earlier, and I had taken refuge in a small office, claiming it as my den. I did not particularly wish to spend time with the others. Mission and Zaalbar were still wary of me; I did not blame them. Canderous was one of those murdering, honourless Mandalorians; although I had been surprised at how well we had worked together. _He, too, feels a strange loyalty to Revan. I wonder what his reasons are._

I motioned for Revan to walk inside and close the door. Bastila had warned me earlier against an affiliation with Revan, but I could not do what she wished. _I am grateful to Bastila for her continued help with my inner struggle; she is an honourable Jedi. _But she did not understand my feelings. _Revan saved me; once from slavery, and now from the Dark Side. I cannot forsake her._

Revan walked in cautiously; I could see the wary mistrust on her face. I knew I was not impervious to falling back into the clutches of the Dark Side, and I knew the same was true for her, possibly even more so. _Perhaps I could redeem myself by guiding Revan back to the light. _We were the same, her and I. I wished then, irrationally, that I was the one bonded to her. _I can help her better than Bastila. I understand her._ I could tell that all Bastila did was irritate the volatile woman.

"What is it you wish to talk about?" I asked softly.

"The Force," she smiled at me, but it did not reach her eyes. "What else? You still owe me Force lessons."

"Of course." She was so hard, so suspicious; but somewhere in her was the charismatic, good Jedi she had once been. "I vowed to you I would help you, and I shall. As much as I am able."

"No waffling on about that stupid code..." she warned in a deadly tone.

A smile flicked on my face. "I remember my trials with the code. I threw a rather childish tantrum because I could not recite it, and my master confined me to solitary meditation. I was not allowed to see anyone but her, nor eat anything bar gruel and water, until I could recall it properly."

Revan's expression lifted somewhat; I could see surprise and amusement as she grinned. "That sounds a bit harsh for a kid."

"My master had harsh ways." I did not want to dwell on that. Bastila had told me the truth about Quatra, and my thoughts were still too tender and emotive on that subject to explore. _I should have realized I could not kill a master. _But that it was all a test, all the misery I'd gone through... _Quatra had warned me I felt too strongly about her, too intensely. Is that why she used it against me?_

"What do you know of Force bonds?" Revan asked as she sat down next to me on the hard bunk. A coarse, woven blanket covered the thin mattress, and she plucked at it absently.

"Like the one you share with Bastila?" I responded. "I do not know much of them. I know mind-links vary in strength and intensity, and the gifts that are part of it differ with the strength of the link."

"Gifts," Revan muttered darkly. "Hah! See if you'd like Bastila inside your head permanently. I don't want to go to sleep. I-" She cut short her rambling, frowning as she mulled over something. "Could Bastila see my dreams? I wondered something the other night..."

"Yes," I answered truthfully. I would not lie to her unless absolutely necessary, and considering Bastila's cryptic comments about that cave back on Tatooine, it seemed they had already shared dreams. Again, I pushed aside a childish desire to be the one bonded to Revan.

"How do I block her out of my mind, Juhani?" Revan asked, gritting her teeth. I could hear the frustrated anger in her voice.

"I thought you were already doing that," I said softly.

"I- I suppose I have been, at times. I wasn't entirely certain how far I had succeeded though."

"I do know that one of the fundamental cornerstones of a Force bond is privacy. You have to be able to trust enough to allow each other privacy. Inside your head." I remembered talking to an older Master who had formed a mind-link with an apprentice of his once. He had said the biggest challenge was giving each other space.

"Oh, sure, I can _trust_ Bastila," Revan muttered sarcastically. "About as far as I'd trust a Hutt."

"I do not know what else to tell you, Jen."

"How do I stop her cutting me off from the Force?" She leaned closer, narrowing her eyes. I stiffened, and felt my eyes widen in surprise.

"She can cut you off from the Force? Are you certain, Jen?" Her face was serious, intent, and not a little bit angry. "I did not know that was possible."

"Hrm," Revan murmured, leaning away from me and stretching her good arm above her head. Her other forearm, newly set, was resting in her lap. Although Revan had started using it, against Bastila's vehement protests, it appeared weak, thin and still slightly bruised. _The longer an injury is left without treatment, the greater the recovery time_. "Well, maybe you can explain how these bonds are created," Revan continued. "Bastila gave me some weak story, and it just didn't ring true. I'd barely seen her on the Endar Spire. I think. It's all a bit hazy."

I tensed; this was heading to unsteady ground. _But it is Bastila's lies, not mine. _"From what I recall, bonds can be created in three ways. The first is the most common; it occasionally can occur between two Jedi working together for a long time. They gradually become sensitive to each other via the Force, and over time a weak mind-link may grow. Even so, it happens rarely."

"And the other two ways?"

I hesitated briefly. "If two Jedi were – intimate, then it is possible for a mind-link to be created. Unlikely, as the very intimacy is frowned upon by the Jedi Council. The third way is-"

A knock on the door interrupted my dialogue, and I looked up as Bastila opened the automatic door. I wondered briefly why I wished she had not appeared. Irritation smouldered in her eyes as she looked at us both, huddled on the bed and talking softly.

"Juhani, Jen," she acknowledged, in a calm tone that betrayed nothing. "Perhaps it is time we talked more about the Force."

"Enough talk," Revan disagreed smoothly, getting to her feet. "Juhani, want to have a duel? There's space in that empty hangar. I'd qui-"

"Duel?" Bastila cut in, her voice rising. She took a deep breath and calmed herself. "Your arm is too damaged, Jen. Also, there is much you should learn, before you start using the Force physically, and I-"

"That's too bad. Juhani?" Revan looked at me, and I saw an odd plea in her eyes. _She does not wish to spend time with Bastila. _Perhaps if we fought, I could help her control the darker side of her emotions, help contain her anger.

"Certainly," I agreed, and Bastila scowled. "Maybe you could watch us and point out our weaknesses, Bastila," I suggested, more to quiet the headstrong Jedi than anything else. This caused Revan to glare at me, and I wondered what I was doing. _I feel sorry for Bastila. And yet I wish I was in her place. I do not understand myself at times._

"Fine," Bastila stated, folding her arms in annoyance. Revan rolled her eyes and stalked out of the room.

xXx

**Saul Karath:**

I scowled at the incoming text transmission, skimming through the details quickly as they appeared on my console. _Malak will not be pleased. _To offer such a vast sum to a foreign society, and have it half-turned down... I did not wish to be the one who relayed such news. The poor sap who'd informed His Psychoship about Calo's defeat had to be scraped off the floor. _Malak never used to be so gratuitously violent. _Causing pain for a purpose was fine; necessary at times, but Malak often took destruction to an absurd level. _Only after he betrayed his master has he so relished causing widespread agony._

I was glad I hadn't known of Malak's plans to fire on Revan's flagship all that time ago, for surely I would have picked the losing side.

Now, as a weak tool of the incumbent Jedi, Revan was next to useless.

Those first years, serving under Darth Revan, had been all I'd dreamed of. Of course I'd feared her – what sort of imbecile wouldn't? – but her sharp tactics, her quick intelligence, and her ability to listen to her subordinates fuelled my own career ambitions. I was a great military leader, and under Revan I had flourished. I genuinely believed that one day we would succeed in her plan of galactic control. Now, under Malak, I wasn't quite as confident.

I heard the swish of the command doors opening behind me, and the noise of troopers standing hurriedly to attention. _Contain your thoughts. _Both Malak and Revan had often shown signs of limited mind-reading.

Personally, I believed the universe would be a far better place without the cursed Force.

"Ah, Admiral. Any news?" Malak's deep, metallic voice intoned. I turned around and bowed hurriedly.

"My lord, I have just received word from the Genoharadan."

Malak folded his arms, his cold, soulless eyes appraising me dispassionately. The ex-Jedi Kylah stood simpering at his side, and I took care to avoid her glance. While Bandon was Malak's official apprentice, Kylah seemed to be his willing pet. I contained my grimace.

"Well?" Malak snapped.

"They have accepted only one of the contracts, my lord. The one on Jen Sahara."

Blind fury crested in his eyes. "I offered them enough to buy a planet!" His fists clenched, and I saw Kylah take a hesitant step backwards. I bowed my head quickly, reverentially, and Malak took an advancing step towards me.

The silence crackled with palpable tension as I kept my eyes focused on the ground at Malak's feet. _How I abhor this pathetic grovelling! _Two years ago Malak had been prone to outbursts of violence, but never unnecessary murder. _The Force and its light and dark sides. It makes them all go insane._

"I would not kill you, Admiral." Malak voice had turned soft; ominous even. Again, I wondered warily if he could read my thoughts. "The Genoharadan, however, have insulted me with this refusal. But we shall deal with them in due course."

_He wants to take on the Genoharadan? _A chill stepped down my spine. Revan had always been reckless, impulsive; but these days Malak took that to new heights.

"I'll have to deal with the Battle Meditation brat myself. Sooner or later, she'll stop on Korriban or Manaan. Manaan first, I'd wager. My forces can take her out there."

"Manaan? But the Selkath don't tolerate-"

"Are you questioning me, Karath?" Malak's voice had dropped to a hiss.

"Certainly not, my lord," I said quickly.

"Manaan is perfect. The Republic idiots think they are safe in their little base on a neutral world; they will not expect an infiltration. Bastila will hide out there while she hunts for the Star Map." Malak paused. "We do not need the kolto supply anymore, Admiral. Not with the power of the Star Forge."

I took care to couch my next words neutrally. "My lord, if the Selkath allow the Republic full access to the kolto, it will give them a great advantage." _He would attack on Manaan, and endanger our kolto supply? Not even Revan would throw such a potential gift to the enemy, no matter how confident of victory she was!_

Malak laughed softly. "The Republic cannot win now, Admiral. Surely even someone with your limited intelligence can see that. There are only two potential threats – Bastila and my old master." His last words had twisted into a bitter, hateful tone. If I had not witnessed first-hand what he had once felt for the former Sith Lord, I would never have believed it.

"Kylah." Malak turned to face his quiet pet.

"Yes, master?" Her voice was almost a coo. If there was one thing I couldn't bear, it was direct ass-kissing.

"Pick out ten Dark Jedi. Do not interfere with the Genoharadan's plans, but make sure Bastila Shan goes down as well. If it means infiltrating the Republic base and angering those pathetic Selkath – then so be it."

Kylah bowed low, her dark red robes touching the ground.

Malak whirled around abruptly, his black cloak spinning around him as he stalked away. "No more mistakes. I want them both dead!" he commanded with finality as he left.

xXx

**Jen Sahara:**

"What are you up to, Mission?" I asked mildly, leaning on a chrome wall of the Ebon Hawk's central room with interest. The Twi'lek girl was all alone apart from her faithful little droid, and appeared to be busily engaged with the ship's communication system. _If I didn't know better, I'd swear she was hacking into the ship's mainframe. _Wait - I did know better.

Uneasy sleep and rampant dreams I could not recall had kept me awake. Everyone else on board was catching up on rest, apart from Carth who was lurking out in the cockpit. _He doesn't need to, this ship is advanced enough to fly itself once in hyperspace. _That odd feeling that had shaken me almost a day earlier, when I'd sat there talking to him, was yet another indication of my mysterious past. _I've flown starships before. I know how. Whose past does this come from? _No matter, it would probably come in useful.

Mission jumped up guiltily, hiding the screen she had been viewing with her back. "Uh, nothing. Nothing really." T3 gave a few reassuring beeps in agreement.

I grinned at her. "Don't let Onasi see you tinkering around with his baby," I warned.

She grimaced, and looked away. "I'm just- I'm just trying to keep myself busy, y'know?" Her headtails twitched and then sagged in desolation. "After Taris, and all that death, and now Griff- well, I don't really want to think about it anymore. I can't sleep and- and, I, well..." She sighed hopelessly, looking at T3 for encouragement. He beeped and whirled, sidling closer.

I felt a sharp pang at the miserable look on her face. Despite my intentions, despite my firm will to care for no one, I could not help but worry for the girl. _Innocence lost. I remember that feeling. _Did I? From where? I racked my memories, but they shied away, vanishing into the clogged haziness that was my past.

I shook my head irritably, and focused on the Twi'lek once more. "So, find anything interesting?" I drawled.

She shot me a relieved grin, and motioned me forwards. "Yeah, I've been looking at the comm. log of the Ebon Hawk. Geez, Davik sure was slime! I never thought I'd say this about anyone, but I'm glad he's dead."

I walked forward, eyeing over the console. Mission had pulled up a list of video signals alongside a supply chart. I felt my lip curl in disgust when I saw purchase orders for several Twi'lek dancing girls. _No wonder Mission feels so strongly. _

"You were lucky, in a way, back on Taris," I mused softly. "It could have turned out so much worse for you, being a pretty, young, Twi'lek girl." The thought of Mission being enslaved to the likes of Davik stirred up my dormant anger. _Why am I spouting this kath crap?_

"Hey, I took care of myself plenty fine!" Mission retorted swiftly, a mulish pout appearing on her face.

"I didn't mean it like that," I said quickly, my eyes narrowing. "Just that-"

"Yeah, yeah I know." Mission cut in, her tone calming somewhat. "I just get enough of this 'you're too young' attitude from everyone. Sorry."

I snorted. "You've more than convinced me of your skills." I turned my attention back to the active console. "Anything interesting in the vid comms?"

"Nah," Mission replied. "Just scummy deals and the like. I'd gotten depressed watchin' them all before you came along, actually."

"Looks like he was quite busy in the spice trade before the Sith quarantine on Taris," I noted, looking over the latter group of digital entries that were matched with orders. My eyes travelled to the end, and then widened in surprise. "Hang on," I said softly.

"What?" Mission leaned in next to me, looking where I pointed. "That's gotta be Carth's transmission to his uppity officers, right? It's the date we left Tatooine."

"The one before that." My voice had dropped to a quiet whisper. "Dated our last night on Tatooine."

Mission turned to frown at me. "I dunno who did that. Shall I play it?"

I nodded, and her hands flew over the controls. A few seconds later and an illuminated figure rose in front of us, a look of inquiry dissolving into surprise. I shivered unwittingly as icy fingers seemed to tap-dance down my spine. _Who is that? _The figure was an old female Zabrak, dressed in plain Jedi robes. Her turquoise eyes were a startling contrast to her darker skin and pointed horns, and made me wonder about her ancestry. _I've met this woman before. I'm sure of it!_

"Padawan Shan!" the Zabrak exclaimed. Mission shot me an inquisitive look, curiosity sparkling in her eyes.

"Master Karon," Bastila's voice echoed from the video replay. My breath caught as I heard the words, and I felt sweat break out on my forehead. A slight shudder passed through me. _Focus. _I caught a brief glimpse of the woman in my mind, holding a light blue lightsaber as she waited for me. Not threatening, not threatened, just ready. _What? Ready for what? Me?_

"It is good to see you again, Padawan. We were unsure who survived the betrayal onboard the Endar Spire-"

"Master," Bastila cut in. _Most unlike her. Her voice sounds almost panicked. I wish this holo transmission would show me what she looked like when she sent it. _"I cannot be long. I need help."

"Help?" the one called Karon looked surprised, and then intent. I felt a dark shiver of rage fill me. _What is Bastila doing? What has she done?_

"Yes. I am heading towards Manaan. I do not have time to contact the Council on Coruscant. Please, would you be able to rendezvous with me there? Or perhaps organize another Master? We will be there in two days time."

_The bitch. The betraying, lying bitch! _Bastila had informed me there were no masters on Manaan. _No masters until she contacted one. _Why was I being such a blind idiot? Why was I still near Bastila? This was the same woman who had sedated me and tried to drag me to her masters on Dantooine. _She's desperate to put me in their clutches. I will not go! **I will not!**_

The Zabrak woman looked solemn, thoughtful, as she replied. "Who else survived the crash, Padawan?"

"The only other survivors were Carth Onasi and Jen Sahara."

"Ah. Well, I do not see how a delegate can arrive on Manaan within two days. I, however, am not far away from that planet. Why Manaan?"

"Please, I have to go. We are taking off now. Thank you, Master, I will explain everything when I see you!" The somewhat startled expression of the Jedi Master was cut off abruptly.

"Well, that was interesting. Y'think Bastila might be worried she's getting behind in her studies?" Mission giggled. I forced myself to smile at her; inwardly I was struggling to stop my rage overcoming me. _She's not going to get away with this! _But the ship was already headed to Manaan. _I need to escape._

"Hey, it's not something to do with you, is it?" Mission inquired, interrupting my maelstrom of thoughts.

"Possibly Juhani and I together. Remember how we found Juhani," I said dryly, forcing my face to impassivity. "And you know how highly-strung Bastila can get."

"Yeah. Are we gonna ditch her, Jen? I mean, I know you're using the Force and all now, but..."

"Yeah, I don't want to put up with her either. We'll see, Mission. Get some sleep, okay?" I ended on a fake teasing note as I stood, and the Twi'lek poked her tongue out at me. I send her a brief, forced smile before turning around and leaving the room.

_How do I get out of this one? I will not be cornered!_ But this transmission was sent almost two days ago; the trap was already laid and about to be sprung. _Would it be so bad? A Jedi Master wouldn't hurt me, right? _But if there was no harm involved, surely Bastila would have told me in advance.

_Damn her! Damn the lying bitch! _I didn't know why I feared seeing any of Bastila's precious Jedi Masters, but the fear and hate were so strong, so tangible, that I'd be a fool not to listen to it.

_Alright, think. There's a way out of this. _It was long past time to be gone. Why had I stuck around Bastila anyway? I'd always planned to leave Taris by myself, but one thing or another had kept me with the group.

I'd walked to the rear of the ship without thinking, to the empty engineering hangar that housed Davik's custom-built swoop bike Mission had drooled over. HK-47 was powered down in the corner, and jerked back to life abruptly as his sensors detected me.

"Master, I am ready to serve."

"Good," I said smoothly. "You can help me out with a little problem."

Together, surely, we could work out a plan to escape Bastila and her little Jedi Master.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_thesnowman - thanks :) Yeah I wanted to show what Mission was thinking with the whole Griff thing, rather than just brush over it. I hope you like Calo's finale!  
Lord Valentai - Cheers :) Yeah...I really, really didn't like Griff :P I guess it showed...  
Brynn - Thanks for all the suggestions, I appreciate it. Hope you enjoy how it turns out!  
Kosiah - thanks, hope you keep enjoying :)  
Red Mage Neko - :laugh: It is indeed, the midget from nam!  
Feza - Cliffhangers are evil...sorry for the long wait!  
Dark Lord Daishi - read on :)  
snackfiend101 - if I hold my breath long enough will you post something:grin: Glad you liked Mission :)  
Data - Yep it was a fairly quick ambush from Calo...but then he was prepared and knew exactly who he was facing - I just didn't want to make the guy too easy :)  
Darth Jenrai - Thank you, glad you like it so much :) Yep, Basi's been put through a lot and I guess it is kinda setting her up for DS - I feel sorry for her as well when I'm writing, but I just can't seem to make her and Jen get along :P_


	32. Desperate Measures

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter 32 - Desperate Measures**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

_What do you do, when you are surrounded by enemies? _I couldn't trust anyone, that was sure. _I can trust Mission. _Well, maybe I could, but the last thing I wanted to do was drag the young girl into danger. _And the Genoharadan are nasty people._

Had I had dealings with them in the past? When that stranger had confronted me on Tatooine, I'd put the datapad away until I was alone. The message itself was compelling, enigmatic:

**The Genoharadan wish you to meet with Hulas on Manaan. Come alone to the south-east quadrant or not at all.**

_The Genoharadan..._ I'd been on the verge of yet another flashback when I read the words, but my memories withered away; the more I'd pushed to recall my past, the more it evaded my grasp. One thought, however, struck me with blinding clarity. _Ah, that shadowy assassination order. They might be useful._ And after watching the rerun of Bastila's betrayal, some deep, subconscious thought sat up and begged for attention. _The Genoharadan are powerful enough to get me off Manaan quickly. _Maybe I had potential allies in other places. All I needed was a way to leave the Ebon Hawk before it landed in the thick of Carth's Republic contacts and Bastila's friendly master.

I'd known what HK's first suggestion was going to be. _I can easily dispose of everybody on board if you want to be alone, master. _No, I didn't wish to kill anyone. _Not even Bastila? _No! I just needed to be alone. _But surely Canderous would be an asset? I could let him in on our plan, I'm sure the Mandalorian could make himself useful... _No, I couldn't trust anyone. HK-47 was programmed to serve his master – me - but trusting a sentient was baring your back for the dagger to find its way home. _If I don't trust anyone, then I'll never care for anyone. _

I scowled angrily, and stamped down on my chaotic thoughts. These days I couldn't always pick the difference between Street Kid and Evil Bitch, but I knew which one was the more powerful. _Hatred and rage fuel the Force. _One of these days, when I finally could use the Force predictably, I was going to track down whatever Jedi had screwed with my mind and have a few words. At the end of a lightsaber.

"Exiting hyperspace," Carth's voice rang over the ship's speakers. I felt the queer sensation ripple through my body as the ship slowed back into realspace. _It's almost time. _HK had assured me that he was skilled enough to make sure no one would be hurt in the upcoming explosion, though he had sounded disapproving.

I wandered through the Ebon Hawk's corridors, lounging just outside the cockpit. Bastila had re-taken her seat as co-pilot; I'd had too much on my mind to bother arguing with her. Between planning my escape and hiding my rage from Bastila, I'd had more than enough mental strain to cope with.

I watched as an incoming transmission bleeped on one of the consoles. Carth leaned over to activate it, and I wondered briefly what his reaction would be after I had successfully escaped; away from them all, at last. _He'd never trust me again. _Well, it's not like he ever trusted me in the first place.

"This is Manaan Spaceport Control. Identify yourself," a crackly voice streamed from the transmission, followed by an interpretation in a low, garbled language. I stiffened a little when I realized I could understand the words. _That's Selkath! Is there any language I don't understand? _Thus far, the Sand People dialect had been the only one.

"This is Captain Onasi of the Ebon Hawk, requesting clearance to land," Carth answered succinctly.

"State your reasons for entering Manaan airspace, Captain Onasi," the voice shot back.

"I thought you said we were expected, Carth," Bastila interrupted. Carth glanced at her in brief irritation, and then responded.

"We are rendezvousing with the Republic embassy in Ahto City."

A pause, and then the crackly voice responded, "you are expected, Captain Onasi. Transmitting your atmospheric entry code and landing coordinates. You have been assigned a Republic docking bay by the request of the Republic Commander Wann."

I slouched in the open doorway as Carth flicked off the communications channel. _No doubt the hangar will be lined with Republic officers. And Bastila's little friend. _But I kept the thought small; I was not going to let her have an inkling of my plans. Not yet.

She must have sensed something then, for she turned her head sharply. Her aristocratic face dissolved into a fake, forced smile. I sent one just as genuine back to her.

The large blue planet of Manaan dominated the view out of the cockpit, and I realized I'd better sit down. Things would be getting interesting very soon.

"Jen, sit down and buckle up, would you?" Carth noticed me, and echoed my very thoughts.

I rolled my eyes and sat in the small, undersized chair behind Carth and Bastila. "As you wish, Captain flyboy," I said sweetly. He turned to shoot me a dry look, but his attention was taken again by the incoming transmission of landing coordinates.

Bastila sighed softly, her dark head resting back on the co-pilot's chair. Black space slowly dissolved into the dark blue of the outer atmosphere. "I will be glad to land," she murmured softly.

_I just bet you will, you lying traitor._

**_Jen? _**She hadn't heard me, but she'd sensed something. I needed to keep control of myself.

_I said, so will I, _I answered within the confines of our bond.

I saw Carth reach over to flick to the repulsorlift engines as we entered the atmosphere, and I braced myself in readiness. A loud explosion boomed through the ship, and I was slung sideways as the Ebon Hawk shuddered at the impact. A myriad of blinking, glaring lights dotted the consoles, punctuated by the piercing wail of warning sirens. Bastila screamed in shock, and I felt my stomach rise as the ship began to plummet.

"Damn, the engines!" Carth yelled, his hands moving instinctively over various dials and warning lights.

I could hear Mission screaming in fright from the common room.

"What's going on?" Bastila gasped, leaning forward as Carth struggled to find the cause.

"Some sort of explosion! It's taken out two thirds of the repulsorlifts!" Carth frantically flicked over several of the dials. "I'm switching back to the sublight drive!"

I fervently hoped HK was as good as he'd assured me. He'd sworn he could disable the ship well enough to force a landing in water, but not too badly so anyone would get hurt in the process. _You'd better be telling the truth, you psychotic bucket of bolts. Otherwise I'll pull you apart and smelt you piece by piece._

Carth hurriedly initiated the faster ion engines, and the whir of the Ebon Hawk's twin turbine compressors built steadily to a high-pitched scream, but did nothing to alleviate our rapid fall.

"What the-?" Carth shouted in surprise, "I've got no power!"

"Why? What's going on!" Bastila gasped, terror colouring her tone.

"Sithspit! The particle accelerator's offline!"

The ship was shuddering under the outward pressure of our descent, and I clutched tightly onto the arms of my chair. _What have I done? Am I truly insane? _Carth swore further when he realized the backup accelerator was also down, rendering the engine useless. The small, perfectly placed explosives HK had organized had certainly done their job. _He may not be an expert at slicing into computers, but he sure knows how to disable a ship._

The dark blue Manaan sky was slowly growing a lighter colour as we plummeted further into the depths of the atmosphere. I could hear Canderous calling Carth a few choice names from further back in the ship. Carth flicked back to the repulsorlifts, and the few engines still functional struggled against the Ebon Hawk's mass, as he desperately dragged upwards on the steering column. I did, however, notice a decrease in our rapid downwards acceleration.

"We'll have to make a forced landing in the ocean, Ahto City is too far away!" Carth immediately opened a communications channel to request help. It was time for me to get ready.

I unbuckled myself and stood up, stumbling against the wall as the ship shuddered. The persistent whine of overworking repulsorlifts thrummed weakly underneath my feet. HK had assured me there would be enough power to make a relatively safe crash landing in the ocean, but not enough for the Ebon Hawk to reach Ahto City.

"Jen! Where are you going?" Bastila shrieked as I careened through the doorway.

"Going to get Teethree and see if he can figure out what's going on!" I yelled back, hoping Bastila wouldn't realize that T3 was probably already doing that. As quickly as I could, I exited the room.

"Hold tight!" Carth's voice shot over the ship's intercom, and the Ebon Hawk lurched to the side. I slammed my head into the corridor wall, and cursed the flyboy underneath my breath. No doubt he was trying to maneuver for the safest landing position, but it certainly made it hard to walk.

I deliberately avoided the common room, heading straight towards the back of the ship. HK was there, waiting for me.

"Statement: Everything is going according to plan, master. The Ebon Hawk should be landing some twenty miles outside Ahto City."

The ship rocked again, and Carth warned us over the speakers to brace for landing. Loose tools and gadgets were rolling on the dull durasteel floor, and I struggled to keep from tripping over them. _It's time._ HK had opened one of the tiny escape pods in preparation, and I clambered into it.

"You know what to do next, HK?" I reiterated as I buckled myself in tightly. _Why do they have to make these things so small?_

"Answer: Yes, master. This escape pod should eject directly towards Ahto City. I will fire off the other escape pods simultaneously, using the last one for myself. Suggestion: Please take care of your weak watery shell, master. I am beginning to like you." The intense red glare of HK's robotic eyes stared at me eerily, and he pulled the door closed. _Of course he likes me. I've just ordered him to sabotage a ship. He'd probably love me if I allowed him to kill someone in the process._

My insides threatened to slam into my throat as the Ebon Hawk crashed into the ocean, and my bones almost seemed to creak in the process. The ship lifted upwards, partly due to a rebound effect and partially to the power of the remaining engines, and I had a brief, vivid vision of a rock skimming across a lake. HK activated the escape pod, and the sudden sideways acceleration yanked my head to the side of the pod, slamming it fiercely into the metal. _Not again..._

…

_The wind lifted my hair, and brought the familiar smell of decaying, rotting rubbish to my nostrils. A muddy brown lake of what once may have been called water stretched out in front of me, and I idly stared as a small stone skimmed off the surface._

"_Told you I was better," I said smugly, clenching my fist full of flat stones and cylindrical credit chips that had been phased out years ago in favour of the plastic, electronic type._

"_No fair, I've only had three goes and you've had about five." A boy was standing next to me, scowling sulkily at his defeat. He was perhaps fourteen or fifteen years old, and grime matted his spiky dark hair to his skull._

"_Sore loser." I stuck my tongue out at him. "You just can't admit that I'm better at everything."_

"_Man, how many times have I heard that tripe?"_

"_Oh yeah? Prove that it's tripe then! Bet you can't catch me!" I challenged recklessly, and turned to sprint away, dropping the stones in my haste. The lake, a rotten pool of sewerage drained from the richer parts of the city, bordered the slummy edge of Western Underground, the only place I'd ever known. Echoing footsteps chased me as I ran back towards the crumbling abandoned warehouses that housed thousands of Altizir's homeless, herded there by the authorities who wanted nothing better than to forget their existence. Gaunt faces stared in surprise as I sprinted through the disused, litter-strewn roads, darkness claiming me as the slummy suburbs stretched underneath higher levels where a different class of people lived. Altizir was one of many cities on my home planet of Talshion, but poverty had always trapped me within its confines. One day, I'd leave this scummy, diseased planet, and see the universe. That was a promise I repeated on those nights when there was no food to be found, and I lay comforting my drug-addicted mother, whose only conscious need was another shot of spice._

_**Jen?**_

_I turned into a lightless, murky tunnel, which I'd been told had once been a transport lane back when Altizir hadn't been quite so big. I leaned against the wall, and contained my heaving breaths. I couldn't hear footsteps anymore, and a wry smile curved my lips in the darkness. _I can still outrun him, even now. Outrun and out-steal him. _Though we always worked better as a team._

_I was yanked abruptly forward, and landed with a thud against someone's chest, gasping in surprise._

"_Gotcha!" His tone was victorious, and he held me tightly. My gut burned in surprise, and I was sharply reminded of all the unwelcome, forbidden thoughts I'd been having lately. _No. We are friends. That's all!

"_You forget, little gal, that I know all your hiding places."_

"_Don't call me that, you know I hate it," I said automatically, struggling to escape. His arms tightened around me, and I wished desperately for some light in the abandoned tunnel. _He's gonna tickle me, dammit!_ Something touched my mouth then, and I stiffened in shocked surprise when I realized it was his lips._

"_Wha-what are you doing?" I gasped, unknown sensations coiling in my stomach. _

_**Jen? Wake up! Where are you?**_

"_It's always been you and me, hasn't it?" His voice was low, soft. "This is only natural, we've always looked out for each other. It's not like we have anyone else."_

"Miss? Are you alright?"

"_Bu-but-" I wanted this, didn't I? "I've got my mother, remember?"_

"She's out cold. Help me out; we'll have to get her back to base before the blasted Selkath get here."

"_Come on, like she thinks of anything except her next hit."_

_I kicked him in the shins then, and jumped backwards. _No one says things about Ma. Not even him!

_**Jen, damn you! How could you do this to us?**_

"She's muttering something sir, I think she might be waking."

…

Someone lifted my torso upwards, and agony blossomed throughout my skull. _Where am I? _My eyes flew open, and painful sunlight sparked into my vision, causing me to abruptly close them again.

"Miss?" a strong, male voice repeated, and full awareness slammed into me. _Kath crap! I've got to get away from whoever these guys are! _"It's alright Miss, we're Republic officers. You're safe now."

_Damn, I really don't have much luck with escape pods. _I hesitantly opened my eyes again, and forced a nervous, scared look on my face. My vision slowly righted itself, and I noticed I was still strapped into the escape pod. The bright blue Manaan sky glared cheerfully from behind the wholesome Republic soldier who was leaning over me, checking me for injuries.

"Ugh, where am I?" I said in a groggy voice, keeping up the helpless act for now. The fierce pounding in my head receded marginally, but it still felt as though a fusioncutter was drilling a hole into my skull.

"You've landed on the shore outside the Ahto City dome, miss. We're going to bring you to safety now." _Oh really? _His voice was helpful yet slightly authoritative, and brooked no arguments – particularly from injured damsels in distress. I curbed a strong desire to Force push him into the depths of the Manaan Ocean.

_**Jen? Are you awake? What have you done?**_

I had to act quickly. My hands flew to unbuckle my body, and I jerked upwards, staring out around me. My escape pod had made it to the rocky shores that bordered Ahto City. The large dome City itself rose impressively near my landing, miles high into the sky. Various openings of the dome allowed interstellar traffic as well as local ocean explorers access to the rest of the planet, which was merely miles of fish-infested saltwater. Two Republic officers, who'd obviously tracked my landing and hastened to rescue me – _or capture me?_ – were standing over me with concerned expressions.

I noticed their speeders parked nearby on the stony beach. _No, these aren't normal landspeeders. _I looked closely at the relatively small vehicles, and realized they had been designed to travel over vast distances of water. _Rescue bikes of some description. _Considering HK had fired off all the escape pods, Republic soldiers were probably using these contraptions to track them all down._ I'm surprised the Selkath didn't get here first. Carth must have got an emergency transmission off to his base._

I looked the first officer straight in the eye. "This escape pod was empty when you found it," I said clearly, succinctly, wrapping the Force around my words tightly as I climbed out of the capsule. This, at least, was one trick I could now do consistently. I felt the power wrap around the second soldier also.

"The, uh, escape pod was empty," the man mumbled at me, and I turned to face the second soldier.

"Your speeder broke down, and is inoperable. You are forced to travel double on your comrade's speeder." I kept the Force tightly interleaved with my words, and Bastila's seething anger grew within the bond.

**_You're ignoring me! And using the Force! If you think I'm going to let you just waltz away like that- damn you!_**

The soldier blinked at me like a stunned gizka, his mouth working slowly. "My, uh, speeder's broken. I, uh, guess I'd better ride double on yours, Stirwin."

Quickly, I whirled around and grabbed items out of the escape pod. HK had done his best to store what he termed meatbag necessities into the tiny pod, and the backpack full of protein bars, credits, grenades and a spare blaster would definitely be useful. My two ex-Sith lightsabers still hung at my sides, reassuringly. I took a step towards the closest rescue bike, and then faced the soldiers once more.

"You'd better go and report to – to whoever you need to report to. The pod was empty, and one of your speeders broke down." I slammed the Force harder into my words, pointing towards one of the rescue bikes.

"We should report back to Captain Gilies," one of them mumbled.

"Uh, yeah, he should know the escape pod was empty. Let's go."

I smirked to myself smugly as I mounted the closest speeder.

**_Answer me! _**Bastila's latest mental shriek rang through my head, and then my senses dulled. My vision somehow lost sharpness, and the tang of salt from the sea became a touch more faint. The piercing throb from my bruised skull, however, increased in severity. With a sense of horror and growing rage, I realized just what she had done.

_You think you can cut **me** off from the Force, you traitorous, lying bitch! _I physically snarled as I punched the ignition, the roaring engine of the speeder as it hummed to life echoing the pounding in my head. The two soldiers were staring blankly, dazedly, at the escape pod, and I briefly wondered if I'd used too strong a dose on them.

**_You said you wouldn't run! You- you endangered us all, you could have killed us with that crazy stunt! You cannot be trusted to wield the Force!_**

A fierce, burning fury grew deep inside me. _I should have ordered HK to kill that bitch. _I slammed defiantly against her mental walls, but they wouldn't budge. I almost wondered whether I could sense a faint sensation of satisfaction emanating from her mental presence, and my rage intensified. _No time to try and break Bastila's hold. I don't need the Force now, I need to get away! I will not let her make me lose control, dammit! Focus! _I needed to get into Ahto City and meet Hulas before anyone else found me. In retaliation, I kicked her out of my mind and closed the metaphorical door. _Maybe she can cut me off from the Force for now, but I refuse to listen to anymore of her incessant shrieking. _

I sped away hurriedly from my crash site, and turned the bike towards the gleaming jewel of Ahto City. _Gleaming jewel, hah. This place was a pacifistic slime pit the last time I came here. _The last time? Salt stung my eyes as the bike whipped over sand and stone, and I wondered just which identity had travelled to Manaan.

_Well, that dream I just had was definitely Street Kid. _Had her favourite boyfriend in it yet again, and I was getting a little sick of the reruns. _It's not like I have all day to reflect on the sentimental ramblings of Street Kid. _I wondered if that part of me was getting as pathetic as Jen was. _There's nothing pathetic about feeling for someone. It makes you stronger, it makes you a better person. _I scowled, and wished I could push out all the voices in my head, not just Bastila's.

The translucent dome of Ahto City dominated my sight as I flew closer. _Almost there. Now all I have to do is find this Hulas, and get off this hole of a planet._

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:  
**_

_thesnowman - Thank you! Yeah that last chapter was certainly setting a few things up :) I'm glad you liked Saul - for a truly great characterization of him, read Lord Valentai's pre-kotor fic.  
Dark Lord Daishi - Third way was how Basi & Rev's was created :) Yeah, Evil Bitch is mostly-ish the dominant one at the moment (Just you wait :evil laugh:)  
Data - Yeah, I'm finding it a bit hard to portray Basi in a nice/good way! She doesn't really have many good choices, and of course being a padawan, she shouldn't have been stuck in this position in the first place :P Jen's on the run, but I promise, she'll be kicking butt very soon.  
Red Mage Neko - Mwahah, I had to do something to make Manaan interesting! Regarding your question - my opinion is definitely. I'd say Saul is an intelligent, ambitious man (whatever his other flaws), and Rev always was the strong strategical/tactical thinker when compared to Malak. If Rev went Dark Side - or even neutral perhaps, I'd say there would be a strong chance of convincing Karath to switch sides. Probably also depends on how the Malak is portrayed, and whether Carth is around :P  
Kosiah - Glad you agreed with the Genoharadan! It just didn't fit :P (Not to mention the other overseers - one busy lurking in the Shadowlands and one out hunting). I dunno, I guess I'd just see that job/occupation as being a bit more full time. Unless it was a more honorary type thing, but then Hulas probably wouldn't have gone on his big quest to kill the others. Glad you like Juhani! I have plans for her development - a bit later, after Manaan, she'll have a stronger focus.  
snackfiend101 - I'll just try to -keep- Manaan interesting for now :) I think it was even worse than Dantooine (and I got bored of that, too :P)  
Aussie Cavalier - Glad you enjoyed! Thanks :)  
Brynn - Glad you liked! Yeah, long chapters are good, though truth be told I usually stick to shorter ones otherwise it's weeks before I post anything.  
Feza - I probably spent more time on the Canderous/Juhani/Calo fight then the rest of the chapter combined, so I'm glad it paid off :) I really, really wanted Calo's end to be a fairly good fight. Heh, glad I'm making people look forward to Manaan :)  
Lord Valentai - cheers! HK parts are good - but difficult to think of scenarios where his POV works. I don't know why I started writing this story in first person, but I don't think I'd do third person quite as well.  
Firera - Eep, hope your compute'rs better. I always like to tie game dialogue in (and maybe modify it) and the poking eyesockets bit just had to be added :P_


	33. Rescuers?

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter 33 - Rescuers?**

_- Zaalbar -_

* * *

I gripped tightly onto the edge of the long, maroon benches that graced the Ebon Hawk's common room as the ship shot out of hyperspace. I was not yet accustomed to that queasy, nauseous sensation, and it did nothing to alleviate the gnawing hunger in my empty belly. 

"Ugh," Mission muttered next to me. "Don't think I'll ever get used to that feeling. It's so _weird._"

I nodded in agreement with my young charge; she was curled up next to me, rifling through her pazaak deck. I was just glad we had finally reached Manaan, and soon I would be standing upon unmoving ground again.

Mission looked up at Canderous briefly. The Mandalorian was sitting opposite us, engrossed in what he was doing; which appeared to be pulling his heavy repeating blaster to bits. The leap from hyperspace into realspace hadn't affected his concentration at all; obviously Canderous had spent some time in space before.

"Canderous, want a game of pazaak?" Mission asked eagerly, waving her deck in what she probably thought was an enticing gesture. Canderous glanced up briefly, snorted once, and then looked down at the parts of his gun which were currently decorating the bare table in the centre of the room.

"No thanks, kid," he muttered, snapping a new power pack into his gun. "You probably cheat."

"Cheat?" Mission sniffed, glaring at him. "I do not! Well- only if I have to. And stop calling me a kid, you old grouch!"

I groaned inwardly as Mission shot her mouth off once more. _Does she have to argue with Canderous? He is probably the only one here who will take offence. _I did not wish to go up against the Mandalorian, but sometimes Mission acted as if it were a given. To my utter surprise, Canderous merely chuckled and then proceeded to ignore her.

Mission poked her tongue out, but when that achieved no response she sighed heavily. I knew the sheer boredom of the space journey had begun eating at her nerves, but I longed for the day when she would develop some patience. She then turned hopeful eyes on me.

"What about it, Big Z? Wanna play to pass the time?"

"(Mission, we are almost there,)" I reminded her. We were already in Manaan airspace, it would not be long before we landed. Already I could hear the winding down of the ion engines, to be replaced by the steady hum of the repulsorlifts. Soon I could get some food.

"Aww, come on! It's not- " Mission's words were cut off by a loud explosion that rocked the ship, tossing us wildly from side to side. Mission screamed in terror, and I landed on her forcibly. Wailing emergency sirens bit into my hearing. _Mission!_

"Get off me!" Mission shrieked, struggling underneath me in fear. I felt the sickening rush of descent, and realized in horror that the ship was falling. Frantically I clawed for the safety belts that lined the benches, yanking one tightly around the squirming Twi'lek and belting her in.

"Kath crap! My bloody gun!" Canderous yelled angrily over the sirens as the dismantled pieces of his gun clattered across the floor, and joined the other loose cargo that was rolling chaotically underneath our feet. Mission's pazaak cards flew from her hand across the room, and I saw a handful of them whack into the Mandalorian's face as he struggled to get up. He cursed again, and thumped noisily into the table. "What's that Republic idiot doing? Getting spiced up to land?"

A high-pitched whirring from the sublight engines initiating once more competed with the shrieking sirens for dominance, but if anything the plummeting of the ship increased. Mission screamed again, and I dragged myself off her, hurriedly searching the worn benches for another belt. My empty stomach heaved and protested, and I swallowed the acrid, sharp taste that had risen in my throat. Canderous had starting cursing in his own language; I could not understand a word, and was rather glad Mission could not as well.

The whirring noise dissipated, to be replaced with the struggling hum of the repulsorlifts that had failed earlier. The ship was still falling rapidly, but somehow the fall seemed less severe. _Whatever happened, it took out some of the repulsorlift engines, and disabled the sublight drive. _Had someone sabotaged the ship? Carth Onasi had hired mechanics to fix it back on Tatooine – could something have happened there?

"Hold tight!" Carth's voice yelled from the intercom, although it was something I did not need to be told. Canderous had finally returned to his senses, and was busily settling himself on the opposite bench, bracing for whatever came next.

Mission shrieked as the ship thumped solidly into what I presumed was the ocean, and I felt the impact jar my very bones. The restraining belt bit deeply into the fur around my waist, and I was glad of the restriction; otherwise I would be rolling on the floor amongst the other cargo.

Canderous had managed to belt himself in also, but he made a frantic grab for a part of his gun as it rolled idly by his feet. He had stopped cursing, but I saw a hard, angry glint in his steel-grey eyes.

I could feel the Ebon Hawk slow down as it landed a second time into the ocean, and breathed out a sigh of relief. _It could have been worse. Fortunately Mission is okay. _If only I knew where Jen was.

"Rescue won't be far away," Carth Onasi's voice broadcasted throughout the ship. "I've contacted the Republic forces, so just hang tight guys- hey! What the-? The escape pods are ejecting!" The transmission cut off abruptly, just in time for me to hear a choice word from Bastila I did not expect.

_Escape pods? Jen? _No, it could not be her; she would not run like this. I knew of her desire to leave – particularly to break off contact with Bastila Shan – but she would not do so without my companionship. I had sworn a life-debt to her after all, and Mission was becoming rather attached to the slightly unbalanced human. _I must make sure._

I turned to face Mission, who was pale and gasping, and laid an arm on her shoulder. The ship's movement had slowed considerably, and was now merely heaving from side to side. "(I will be right back, Mission.)"

She nodded, and gave me a weak smile. Sometimes I marveled at how brave the young girl was.

"Well I, for one, want to know exactly what happened, and why we've got a crazy idiot for a pilot," the Mandalorian growled from the other side of the room, as he rose to pick up the remaining pieces of his blaster. I ignored him as I stood, personally believing that Carth Onasi had done a respectable job of landing, considering the damage that explosion seemed to have inflicted on the Ebon Hawk's engines.

I picked my way gingerly over datapads, blaster pieces and pazaak cards that were sprawled over the durasteel floor. The unsteady bobbing of the ship compromised my progress as I left the room, and further increased the gnawing sensation in my stomach. For all that I was hungry, the idea of a meal was beginning to lose its appeal.

I could feel the weak hum of the surviving engines underneath my feet, and surmised that the ship had just enough power to stay marginally above the water. As I neared the cockpit room, I heard raised voices.

"What do you mean, Jen's in one of the escape pods?" Carth's voice; unnaturally high and angry. _No! _It could not be true, could it? Horror slammed into me. _Mission will be heart-broken. She has only just lost Griff. _And I had a life-debt to honour.

"She is running. She is also unconscious, I can feel it." Bastila Shan's voice was tightly clipped, but I could hear a blend of panic and anger in the aristocratic tones.

"_Feel_ it? Is this that bond she was waffling about?"

"I-I am surprised she spoke of it. It is true, we share a mind-link of sorts." Bastila sounded as if she'd rather sleep in a sarlaac pit. My hackles rose just as her tone. She was a Jedi – someone to be respected – but I did not like the antagonism between her and Jen. _Jen ran! I have to find her._

"But if she's in the escape pods- do you mean to say that Jen caused the explosion?" Carth said disbelievingly, his voice almost choking.

"Of course she did! Do you think it occurred all by itself?" Bastila snapped.

"No, but I- dammit! Damn that traitorous woman! I knew I couldn't trust her, I knew she was crazy, but how could she do something like this? We could have died!"

A howl wrenched itself from my lungs, born out of misery and anger combined. _I owe a life-debt to you, Jen Sahara! How could you dishonour me by running?_ Bastila and Carth jumped in their seats at the sound, and whirled around to stare at me in surprise. Bastila opened her mouth to say something, but a piercing beep from the controls grabbed her attention.

"Good," Carth muttered, turning back to the consoles. "Looks like our rescue has arrived. There's a Class-A salvage craft above us; moving into position to pick us up." He frowned. "I'm surprised they didn't announce their presence first."

"(We have to get Jen!)" I howled in distress. Bastila turned to nod at me, and I could see the worry darkening her eyes. Whether she was truly worried for Jen or not was another matter.

"We will, Zaalbar. We will find her," she told me softly.

Carth flicked a few switches, and opened a communication channel. "This is Captain Onasi of the Ebon Hawk. Might we know who our rescuers are?"

There was no response. Our quiet waiting was interrupted rudely by an abrupt jarring of the entire ship, as something clunked loudly onto the hull. _That must be the towing clamps. _Bastila gave out a little gasp at the movement.

"Hello? This is the Ebon Hawk, can you respond?" Carth repeated, and the Ebon Hawk was jerked to the side as another magnetic towing clamp latched onto the ship. I was pushed against the chrome doorway at the movement.

"Alright, what's going on? I always knew the Republic were lousy fighters and worse pilots, but you really take the cake, Blaster Boy," Canderous drawled behind me, using one of Jen's pet names for the Republic officer. Carth stiffened, but to his credit did not even turn around.

"They're not answering. This isn't good, a rescue team should be checking on the survivors before towing the ship away," Carth muttered as he scanned over the readouts. Another two clunks sounded against the Ebon Hawk's hull; and as the ship was yanked upwards I stumbled back into the Mandalorian. Canderous grumbled as I straightened myself abruptly.

"Well it's either the Selkath or the Republic, surely," Bastila said archly. "Who else would be rescuing us? Perhaps they simply do not have adequate transmissions onboard."

"Yeah, now that sounds plausible," Canderous said sarcastically, and I wondered if the Mandalorian was trying to pick a fight. _But he has a point. Even the lowliest vehicle has a transmission device._

I saw Carth tap something into the communications console, and lean forward to speak again. "Republic HQ, this is Captain Onasi of the Ebon Hawk. Can you acknowledge?"

The crackle of static filled the room, broken quickly by the response. "Captain Onasi, we have received your distress signal and are on our way."

The noise of engines directly above us permeated the room ominously, and the Ebon Hawk was lifted upwards. I stumbled again, and this time made a grab for the tiny seat directly behind Bastila. It did not adequately fit my frame, but it was better than continually falling into the Mandalorian's arms.

"Republic HQ, your salvage craft has already picked us up, but is not responding to our communications," Carth said flatly into the receiver. I heard a tone of worry enter his voice, and felt my hackles rise. _This must be a Republic rescue. Who else could it be?_

"Uh- Captain Onasi? Our salvage fleet is en route to your ship and the escape pods we detected. We are approximately ten minutes away from your destination," the ominous response cut through the air, and Carth's shoulders tensed. The Ebon Hawk continued to be dragged upwards.

"Repeat – we have already been picked up," Carth stated loudly. "If not by you, then who?"

"A moment, Captain Onasi," the response fired back. "We are scanning the area."

"It must be the Selkath," Bastila said softly. "If it's not the Republic, then it has to be the Selkath. Right?"

Carth shook his head angrily. "The Selkath would at least respond to our transmissions. I don't recognize the make of this ship, but it almost looks as though it were a -"

"Captain Onasi?" A different voice crackled over the speakers, and I peered worriedly at the consoles. Ship technology I was unfamiliar with, but the green dots seemed to blink a warning at me. "This is Lieutenant Waltzar of the Salvage Freighter _Oceanic Bounty; _we are on our way."

An angry sigh expelled from the Republic pilot, as he leaned forward to respond once more. "Lieutenant Waltzar, we are already being towed! By what appears to be a Sith ship!"

"The Sith?" Bastila exclaimed in horror, and I felt my muscles tense. From everything I'd seen on Taris, the Sith were people to be avoided. And I doubted they would take a liking to either Bastila or Carth. _Or Jen. Wherever she is. Why did you run, Jen? Why?_

"Nice landing, Republic," Canderous drawled behind me. "Right into the laps of the Sith."

Lieutenant Waltzar's voice shot back from the console. "Captain Onasi, we are aware of the situation, and are dealing with it. Sit tight, we will be there soon." The transmission was abruptly cut off, and Carth cursed under his breath.

"Sit tight? While we're dragged away by the Sith?" Carth muttered angrily.

"The Sith," Bastila repeated. I caught a pale, shocked look on her face as she blinked rapidly. "No. Jen, what have you done?"

"Jen?" Canderous barked in confusion. "What's she got to do with anything?"

Bastila was holding a hand over her mouth, her face devoid of colour. "They will not take me," she said softly as a new sort of determination appeared in her eyes. "They will not."

"Now that's the sort of attitude I like to hear," Canderous said in approval. "If the Sith want us, we'll give them a worthy battle."

Bastila yanked off her safety harness, and stood upright in the crowded cockpit, removing her lightsaber from her belt. "I will not be captured again! Carth, open the top hatch."

"Are you crazy?" Carth stared in her in aggrieved confusion. "Sit down! It's not like you can do anything."

"I will not just sit by and let the Sith capture me, Carth!" Bastila clenched her hand tightly over her deactivated lightsaber, and started to climb over my legs that were jutting into the middle of the cockpit. I looked at her apologetically as I tried to move out of the way. "If I have to climb outside and cut through those towing clamps myself, then so be it!"

"Bastila! There's no way you can hold on to the top of the ship! You'll fall into the ocean!" Carth protested, his voice rising in confused desperation.

"Republic's right," Canderous grated, but to my surprise he actually sounded more than a little admiring. "You ain't gonna do nothing up there bar feed the fishies."

A cold, determined look tightened the Jedi's face. "You both underestimate how the Force can aid me. I cannot let the Sith capture me. Carth – you of all people should understand that!"

"Bastila – wait!" Carth called desperately as the impassive Jedi moved passed Canderous in the doorway. "There's another salvage craft coming near! I think it's the Republic."

I saw Bastila tense, and turn back around.

"Well, don't just sit there," Canderous growled. "Find out what they're gonna do about this."

"Who's piloting this ship, Mandalorian?" Carth snapped. My shoulders drooped at the incessant bickering. _Why is everyone fighting? _If Jen was here, she'd probably laugh at them all. _Why did you run, Jen?_

Carth flicked on more of the communications, and a loud crackle filled the room, followed quickly by angry voices.

"Halt!" came the voice of the Republic Lieutenant Carth had spoken to earlier. "This is Lieutenant Waltzar of the Republic. You are stealing Republic property. We demand that you release the Ebon Hawk at once."

A different, lower voice replied, "we are a salvage crew for the Sith empire. You know the rules of salvage – first in, first served."

"None of them will budge. And we're the prize," Carth muttered. I felt a strong desire to check on Mission, but considering my precarious place on the chair I decided to stay put.

"The rules of salvage do not apply to survivors, Sith scum! This is Manaan – theft is dealt with justly! Hand over the ship!" Waltzar's proper tone had turned angry over the transmission.

"This is not theft, you weak Republic idiot! The Ebon Hawk is the flagship of the late Davik Kang – an entrepreneur who owes the Sith Empire a sizeable amount of cash. We are taking his ship as compensation, and if you try to stop us we will consider it an act of hostility." The responder sounded smug, and I felt the growing of fear claw within me. _What will they do to us? What will they do to Mission?_

"You try to take our people hostage and we will be forced to fire on you!" Lieutenant Waltzer shrieked, all vestiges of control gone.

Carth winced. "Someone has to teach that boy the fine art of diplomacy."

"We ain't gonna get out of this without a fight," Canderous commented.

_No more fighting. _I just wanted a little bit of peace, time to relax and try to bring that cheeky smile back to Mission's face. _And time to find Jen. I must find her._

"Hey!" Carth said in surprise. "There's another squad of ships heading this way. A whole host of them. One's a light starfighter. Heh, we're certainly attracting attention." For all that his tone was light, Carth did not really sound amused.

"Desist your hostilities at once!" a different voice sounded through the computers, and this one appeared to have as much trouble speaking Basic as I did understanding it. The voice was low and jumbled, like someone who understood that thrown-together language well, but could not quite reproduce all the sounds. _I know exactly how that feels. _"This is Leader Al'hini of the Ahto City Civil Authority. Violence will not be tolerated! Release the ship in question!"

"Well, ain't this turning into quite the tea party," Canderous drawled.

"What is going on?" the quiet voice of the Cathar Juhani emanated from further behind the Mandalorian, crowding out the doorway into the cockpit. Bastila crawled over me once more to resume her place in the co-pilot's chair.

"Leader Al'hini, this is Captain Jerome of the Sith Empire. We are towing this salvage against the debt that the late Davi-"

"We heard your reasons, Captain, we have been listening," the Selkath cut in impatiently. "You will not violate the Manaan neutrality laws! This will be judged at the courts. For now, the Ebon Hawk will be impounded, and its occupants are free to stay where they wish."

"Impounded?" Carth burst out disbelievingly, and flicked on the transmission. "This is Captain Onasi of the Ebon Hawk, and this is my ship! The Sith can't just come-"

"Captain Onasi, you're arguments can be heard in the Ahto City courts. You will be fully entitled to an arbiter when the time comes. For now, everybody disperse! We will tow the Ebon Hawk back to Ahto City."

"Bloody Sith," Canderous muttered behind me, but I wondered if I heard a faint tone of amused respect in the warrior's gravelly voice.

xXx

Carth angrily chased all of us out of the crowded cockpit, and we sat silently in the Ebon Hawk's circular common room, a gloomy quiet residing over everybody as the ship was slowly tugged to shore. Even Bastila, after failing to contact some person called Karon, had been yelled at to leave. The Republic pilot seemed to feel the effects of Jen's betrayal deeply, if his temper was anything to go by.

"I can't believe she'd do this," Mission whispered brokenly next to me. A fist clenched my heart at her voice. _Why, Jen? You knew how awful Mission had been feeling. You must have known how she would react to this. _How well did I really know this strange human I was indebted to?

"She is running," Juhani interrupted softly, and I stared at the Cathar warily. "Running from anything that will make her face herself." Juhani lowered her voice, and whispered under her breath, her shoulders tensing, "running from the Dark Side."

I stiffened as the words filtered through my ears. I doubted anyone else had caught the Cathar's sentence, but a Wookiee's hearing was naturally sensitive. _Is this Juhani correct? Is this all about the Force? _Jen Sahara had not been trained to be a Jedi, and yet suddenly she was wielding power blindly, without control. And her rage... _Is she running because she fears the Dark Side? Or worse...? _I had to find her. I had a duty- I was obligated to help her. _I will find you, Jen Sahara. I will stand by your side, and help you with your battles. _But how much could a Wookiee do against the mystical, frightening power of the Force?

"But why? Why did she leave without me?" Mission's voice was pitifully weak. "I trusted her."

"That's the problem with trust. It always gets broken," Carth stated coldly from the doorway. Bastila stared up at him, and threw a pointed look back towards the cockpit. He shrugged. "I have no engines, and we're being towed. There's not much I can do in there other than wear out the seats." He barked a harsh laugh, but his eyes were bleak. "Well, at least we're still alive. I'm not sure if we were meant to live through that explosion."

"Don't add stupidity to your other faults, Republic," Canderous snapped angrily. Even the tough, unflappable Mandalorian seemed upset. "If she wanted to kill us, I'd say we'd be pretty dead by now. Well, you lot would be," he grunted, and threw aside the blaster he had been toying with. "I'd like to punch her for this as much as the next guy, but she deliberately _didn't_ kill us. HK's missing, ain't he? I'd bet my last cigarra that these explosives were precisely placed so as _not_ to hurt us."

"I will find Jen," Bastila muttered, seemingly to herself. Again, another sentence that I doubted anyone else in the room heard. "She will not escape."

The hairs on my back stood up as I stared at the Jedi. _Escape? _Jen wished to leave Bastila Shan, I knew, but Bastila almost made it sound as if Jen were a prisoner. _Mission always believed the Jedi had another agenda. _I had wondered myself, particularly when Jen had been acting so strange back on Taris. _What do the Jedi want with Jen? _I understood that she was a Force user who needed tuition, but at times her circumstances seemed far more ominous.

Mission stuffed her hands in her pockets, and curled her legs up on the battered bench next to me. I'd made her wear the safety belts once more, although considering the slow crawl with which we were being towed to safety, it didn't really matter. "Guess it's just you and me again, Big Z," she muttered, a distraught frown pleating her young face. "At least I know I can count on you."

"(We will find Jen,)" I rumbled softly, reassuringly.

Mission shrugged, and I saw a stubborn, mulish look pass over her face. "If she wants to be on her own, then let her. We would've followed if she asked. I don't need her."

Her words, although defiant, failed to cover up the misery in her tone. I did not often feel angry, but I was starting to. I wanted to shake Jen for the pain she was causing Mission, but part of me wondered at Jen's reasons for running. _Maybe she had just cause. _"(I must find her, Mission. I have a life-debt to honour.)" But if Jen was running from Bastila, then I couldn't trust the Jedi for help. I would have to find Jen by myself.

"If you can find her. I don't think she'll wanna be found," Mission shot back. I saw Bastila blanch at the words, and wondered myself. _Where have you gone, Jen Sahara? How can I aid you if you run away? _I would not leave Mission; could not leave the only person who believed in me. But the heavy weight of the life-debt dogged me with obligation. I had to find Jen.

_But how do you find someone who does not wish to be found? And what will I do if I cannot find her?_

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xXx

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_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - Thanks :) I was glad to hear that. I must admit, I get a little worried about reactions when I change the story :P (Hasn't stopped me in the past, I know, I'd get bored writing the same plot over again.) Hrm, your loopy comment has inspired me to mess with Jen's mind a little more in chap34 (mwhaha).  
thesnowman - Yep, she certainly is - a young padawan stuck with babysitting the ex-Sith Lord. Hrm :P  
Kosiah - :grin, Shhh, don't tell Jen that :P  
snackfiend101 - Yep :grin:  
Brynn - Glad you liked. Nah, not in the engine room (I imagine the explosion would have caused damage to them otherwise). Um, the cargo hold?  
Data - Yeah, I know - Basi won't retain that for too long. Glad you liked her escape :)  
Dark Lord Daishi - There will be fights/action soon - not sure if that will be the line-up though :grin, we shall see.  
Red Mage Neko - :grin: Things must be bad if you want Jen back :) This is building up to something though.  
Darth Jenrai - here's more :) This chapter's a bit of a filler really, for what happens to the rest of the crew, but Jen will be back next chapter.  
Xan - Glad you're enjoying it for the most part, and thanks for the feedback. Basi's not really meant to be hugely likeable at this stage of the story - but, I was worried if I was going overboard. Guess I was :P I'll try to temper her a bit more, let me know how you think it goes.  
Lunatic Pandora1 - :grin, yeah I suppose her reaction could go many ways at the moment.  
Firera - Heheh, glad you like. I'm not saying nothing 'bout the ending just yet :)_


	34. On the run

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

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* * *

****

**Chapter 34 – On the run**

_- Jen Sahara -_

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The clinical chrome walls of Ahto City surrounded me as I walked down one of the large, circular corridors that branched through the place like a spider's web. The entire city had a stark, utilitarian feel to it that reminded me gloomily of a hospital; albeit without the sharp whiff of antiseptic. The utter lack of litter, graffiti - even so much as a speck of dirt - made me feel like I was walking unwanted through a pristine dream. The dull pounding from my head dogged me with each step, and merely added to my detached, numb state of being.

_The Selkath sure do like it clean and stark around here. _I couldn't even see any lurid neon signs, or dark strangers doing dark deals in corners. Considering the poor attire of the people who were walking cautiously past me, it wasn't because I was in the rich side of town. _This entire city is one controlled, unreal place. _I didn't like it.

But people were people; no doubt crimes were committed, information exchanged, spice sold – like on any other planet. In Ahto City, one just had to be a little more discrete.

Small flying service droids buzzed over the heads of sentients, ostensibly keeping an eye on things. My vision snagged on the cameras hung high into the gleaming silver walls, and I restrained the urge to tug my hood down lower. _Good thing HK had the foresight to suggest I wear semi-concealing clothing over my armour. _I had no idea if the Selkath would be trying to track me down – would this Master Karon's influence extend that far? I fought down the rage bubbling within me; the mere thought of her or Bastila was enough to tear at the edges of my fragile control. _Priorities. Focus on getting off Manaan first._

But thoughts of the crew warred for prominence; a masochistic side of me kept picturing Mission's face as she found out I'd left. _Stop it. It's not like I really betrayed them. The crash won't have hurt anyone. _But I knew how Mission would see it; so soon after realizing the true scummy nature of her oily brother. I'd had half a mind to stay on Tatooine, find Griff, and beat him to a satisfyingly bloody pulp. _Mission was a weakness. It is better that I left her behind. Weaknesses should be shed._

The corridor exited into a sweeping, open courtyard; sunlight pouring in from the heavens through the dome above. I'd wondered about the necessity for a domed city, and had noticed the high humidity making it awfully unpleasant to wear even a cheap suit of thin, second-hand plated armour underneath a loose jacket. _The Selkath are a reptilian creature. This city is probably climate-controlled for their comfort._

A particularly noticeable shaft of pain spiked from my head injury, and I lifted my hand up instinctively. My most recent bout with an escape pod hadn't done any severe damage; the whopping bruise I could live with, but a residual dizziness had reared its ugly head as I'd hastily flown the speeder to Ahto City. I'd managed to dump the rescue bike quickly and hightail it out of the commercial port before being questioned by any of the authorities; but as soon as I'd made it into Ahto City properly I'd almost fainted.

_Concussion is what I really don't need right now. _A passing Aqualish glared at me suspiciously, and I realized I was still clutching my head. I grimaced to myself, dropped the hand, and moved on. _Maybe the trip on the speeder wasn't such a good idea. _The violent humming of the bike's engine had resonated within my forearm, still weak from the break back on Tatooine, and the residual ache was only overshadowed by the dizzy nausea pounding through my head. I scowled. _I'm a mess. I've got to pull myself together and actually appear competent, or the Genoharadan won't give me a chance._

I glanced around the courtyard quickly. I was somewhere in the eastern part of Ahto City, walking through a large courtyard graced by a rather ugly statue of a fierce, toothy shark. I wandered towards it slowly, and made out the words 'Eastern Quadrant' inscribed in Basic on a small, bronze plaque. More was written below in Selkath, but I couldn't make out all the words. _Something about a god, and wrath. _I stared back at the shark. _Trust the Selkath to worship a fish._

I heard a snide laugh, and turned my head sharply; creating the onset of another wave of dizziness. A group of predominantly humans stood sniggering near the edge of the courtyard, eyeing me over. They were all clothed in a tan, tight-fitting uniform, and with a spark of awareness I recognized it as the casual attire of Sith troops. They didn't seem inclined to approach me, but it was obvious they were mocking me from afar.

I shivered; and felt goose bumps prick under many layers of clothing. My vision darkened abruptly; I steadied myself with one hand leaning against the repulsive statue, but it was too late...

…

_Frustrated rage bubbled inside me; I knew I should work through my anger and control it, but it wasn't nearly as satisfying as ranting within my own head. _Why is he questioning me? We've got this far, and now he's uncertain? _I couldn't believe it, and striding blindly through the perfect, controlled streets of Ahto City was simply raising my ire further. _I hate this place. Bloody Selkath. _The shining chrome walls of the corridor glided out into a large courtyard, marred by a hideous statue of a firaxin shark. _Their mythical god. The Selkath should go back to the bottom of the ocean, and stay there. _Unfortunately, it sounded like I would be the one journeying to those murky depths. I grimaced._

"_Hey!" a mocking voice called out, and I stiffened, whirling around. A group of four Sith stood facing me cockily, throwing superior looks my way. _Damn the Manaan neutrality laws. A bit of violence is just what I need.

"_This street is for Sith only," the closest woman told me imperiously, her eyes flicking over my clothes in disdain. "You got to pay a twenty credit toll to walk down this street."_

_Amusement warred with fury, but these days my anger was winning more often than not. It hadn't always been that way..._

…

"You can have your credits when you take them from my cold, dead hand," I snarled, and blinked suddenly as I stared up into the grinning face of the shark. In the distance a Selkath was glaring at my hand angrily; I jerked the offending limb away from the statue, but still his eyes bored into me suspiciously. _Just what I didn't need to do – draw attention to myself._

"Well, well," a smarmy voice called, and I turned to see the group of Sith soldiers walk closer. "Lookee, it's a drunk wanting to pick a fight."

I stiffened, and felt my face tighten as the Sith sauntered towards me. I felt disastrously light-headed, and although the feeling was dissipating slowly, I wasn't sure if I was up to conflict. _Up to it? I can't actually desire violence – not here on Manaan! _Oh yeah. The neutrality laws.

The leader of the gang crossed her arms and smirked condescendingly at me; her fair hair and cold, blue eyes appeared identical to the Sith I'd just seen in my mind. _Could it be the same one? Or do all the pathetic Sith minions look so similar?_

"What?" she spat. "Got nothing to say now, gutter trash?" A man behind her sniggered, and two of the group surreptitiously moved to flank me. My latent anger stirred once more, firing adrenalin through my veins.

"I've got plenty to say," I said flatly. "I just doubt your ronto turd of a brain could comprehend it."

A look of surprise flashed sparks in the woman's eyes, and then she tilted her head back to laugh uproariously. "My, my," she purred. "Looks like the drunk rat has claws."

My mouth twitched in amusement; the Sith caught my expression and her smirk dropped like a stone in the Manaan ocean. An ugly scowl took its place.

"You want a fight, gutter scum?" she sneered, and took a threatening step closer. The woman's face was mere inches from mine; I could almost see the pores of her plastic skin. _Like she could challenge me. I can rip her head off in one second flat! _"Go on, I'll even give you the first shot." She spread her arms open invitingly, her expression transforming back to cocky assurance. My eyes flicked over her companions; four of them in total, standing passively as they watched our altercation. My fist curled. _One quick jab to her throat, and she'll be down. _The muscles in my weak, healing arm ached as I tensed them. I stared back into the mocking blue eyes of my aggressor. _Why is she pushing for me to start the fight? _I glanced briefly past her shoulder and had my answer.

A group of armoured Selkath were striding purposefully across the courtyard, directly towards us. _Sithspit! I'm a brainless Gamorrean! Is my desire for violence so strong that I overlook common sense? _I flung my hands upwards, palms first, in the universal gesture for peace. "I don't want a fight," I said loudly, concisely, my voice ringing false over the flawless beauty of Selkath architecture. "I'm sorry if I caused offence, I did not mean to."

The woman dropped her arms, and I caught the flash of disappointment on her face. _Pathetic. Is this how the Sith prove themselves on Manaan? Try to get an unsuspecting stranger to hit them first so they'll be jailed? _And I thought the Sith on Taris had been weaklings. I smirked, but bowed low to the woman, aware of the close proximity of the Selkath. "I beg your pardon," I repeated my empty platitudes.

"Break it up!" one of the Selkath exclaimed in a slurring voice. "You Sith, always trying to cause trouble! Leave that human alone!" The three Selkath marched around the Sith party, their shiny armour gleaming a burnished bronze colour. _Typical. No doubt the Selkath soldiers have to look as pretty as their environment. _

I bowed deferentially to the Selkath, and stepped away from the crowd. The first Selkath nodded to me brusquely, and continued his halting lecture. As I quickly strode away from the courtyard, I could still hear the words 'trouble-maker' and 'no respect for the law'.

_Phew. That was too close. _

xXx

I walked out into a large quadrant that seemed to hold nothing bar a rather dismal view of the nearby ocean through the glossy dome. A few sentients were walking casually past, and I saw a Selkath jabbering furiously to a human. Nearby, leaning unobtrusively under a hanging pillar, stood a dark red humanoid droid. A small smile curved my lips as his eyes flared in recognition, and I strode closer.

"Greeting: It is good to see you again, and in one piece, master."

I grinned, and glanced around the courtyard. If my bearings were correct, then this was the southeast quadrant mentioned in the mysterious message from the Genoharadan. The centre of Ahto City was precisely organized into eight large quadrants, laid out like dinner plates surrounding a banquet. This had to be the place, but where would I find Hulas?

The courtyard itself looked identical to the earlier one I'd passed through, albeit without the grotesque statue. A waist-height ferrocrete wall bordered the half of the enclosure that faced the sea; it seemed a popular place for sentients to gather and talk. One Rodian was idly shuffling a deck of what appeared to be Pazaak cards; nearby, a group of Selkath were talking amiably. A few people strolled through the area casually, but I could not see anyone lurking about that appeared to be a secret agent for a cryptic organization.

I frowned. "HK, do you think any of the people around could be contacts for an assassination order?"

HK gave me what could have been construed as a dubious look, had it come from a sentient, but dutifully scanned the area. "Observation: I highly doubt it, master."

"Yeah, me too," I muttered. What was I asking a droid for, anyway? My eyes snagged on a dark doorway set into the towering chrome walls, and I walked closer. A tiny plaque above the opening read "The Spacer's Break." _A cantina. Of course._ Where else would you go looking for disreputable sorts?

As I neared the entrance, I made out a large figure slouching against the wall within. It jerked upright at my approach, and strode forward to meet me, one eye gleaming maliciously from the shadows.

"No droids," the Abyssin grunted, yanking an accusatory finger at HK. My natural instinct was to persuade him otherwise, until I was gloomily reminded of my current inability to reach the Force. _No time to worry about that now._

I smiled tightly. "No problem. HK, stand guard outside."

"Protest: But master, how can I protect you if I am not with you?" HK objected.

"HK, this is Manaan. Nothing ever happens here," I idly threw over my shoulder, as the Abyssin moved aside and let me pass.

The interior of the cantina was dimly lit, and it took a few seconds for my eyes to adjust. Empty booths and pazaak tables lined the walls; the only sentients around were talking in hushed whispers. I noticed the utter lack of Selkath around, and wondered absently if the reptilian species ever frequented such places. _Well they may not come in here, but they're watching all the same. _Cameras hung discretely from the ceiling, ensuring the Selkath authorities kept an eye on even such a place as this.

The bar itself was deeper into the cantina, and as I strode further inside I heard the soft wailing of Bith musicians. A few halogen lamps dotted around the place offered a dismal light, and the ensuing shadows mated with thick cigarra smoke. A handful of people sat smoking near the band, but the rest of the cantina had an eerie, empty feeling to it.

The Ithorian behind the bar grunted as I walked up to him, and focused beady eyes on me.

"What'll you have?" he asked roughly.

I grabbed a handful of credit chips HK had obtained for me, and thrust them on the bar. It was well more than a mug of beer. "A Forvish ale," I stated. As the Ithorian moved to take the cash, I leaned forward. "I'm looking for Hulas," I said in a lowered tone, and then thrust the small pile at him.

The Ithorian blinked, looked down at the credits and then back at me. "I don't know no Hulas," he responded.

I scowled, and pulled out another handful. _At this rate I'll be all out. _"Maybe this will help," I commented, and slid the pile over the beer-soaked bar.

The Ithorian pocketed the second lot of money. "Thanks. But it doesn't," he threw over his shoulder as he turned to serve a twi'lek that had walked up for another drink.

My spine stiffened, and anger curled threateningly in my stomach. _He thinks he can just take my credits for nothing? _My jaw clenched, and a heat wave of rage washed through me. Abruptly, I felt Bastila trying to communicate through the bond, and wondered if she had sensed my anger. I had to resist a natural instinct to hammer at her Force block.

_What do I do now? No Hulas, no way off Manaan?_ I felt my fingers twitch towards a hidden blaster. _Remember the cameras. This entire place is monitored. I can't get violent!_

The Ithorian bartender returned a moment later, and nodded towards the side of the room. "Someone has a message for you," he grunted.

I blinked, and stared in the direction he was indicating. One of the shadowy booths imbedded into the cantina wall held a solitary robed figure. _How did he communicate that so quickly? _My eyes narrowed on the twi'lek the bartender had served, but the green-skinned sentient was turning back to listen to the band. I shrugged inwardly. _Nothing for it. _

The cloaked figure did not look up as I slid into a seat opposite him. He was a Rodian, decked out in an unobtrusive grey robe that covered his torso. His posture was deliberately casual as he leaned his elbows on the greasy table, but did not meet my eyes.

"Hello, Hulas," I said softly.

The Rodian finally looked at me, ducking his head to glance under my hood. I was glad of the disguise; I did not want him to see my face until I had sounded him out.

"A human?" he said finally. "There are Selkath everywhere, but you choose to speak with me. Am I so different? Do you think I have answers that others do not?"

"That's a rather strange greeting," I replied. "To someone who has been asked to meet the Genoharadan."

Hulas paused, but to his credit his expression did not change. "You have the advantage of me, human. There is power in names, yet in the end a name alone means less than nothing," he finished rather enigmatically.

_He is a genuine agent. His poise, his stance... a lackey, maybe, but definitely Genoharadan. _How did I know that? What dark dealings had I had with them in the past? "My name is Jen Sahara," I said simply.

Again his expression did not change, but this time I noticed his jaw clenching. _He's surprised. He wasn't expecting me to turn up. I wonder why?_

"Ah, yes." His tone was light, neutral. And yet something struck me as being slightly off. "You may be wondering just what the Genoharadan is."

I shrugged. "A secret assassination society, who may be interested in my skills."

Again the slight pause. I was beginning to realize that minuscule delay was the only indication Hulas gave of astonishment. "And yet, we are so much more. But this is not the most appropriate place to speak of such things. Come, let us move a more private setting."

Hulas moved to stand, but I cut him off quickly. "I don't have time for that, Hulas," I said flatly.

He stared at me impassively, but raised an eyebrow. "You do not have time for a walk, yet you had time to seek me out? That strikes me as strange, Jen Sahara."

I smirked. "It's very simple. Your organization is interested in hiring me. I, in turn, need to leave Manaan. Immediately." Hulas made no direct reply, so I continued. "I know you have the ability to get me off Manaan, Hulas. Do that, and I'll join the Genoharadan."

Hulas crossed his arms, but again I inwardly damned the detached expression on his face. _Does this guy ever show any emotion? _He may as well have been a block of permacrete. _Well, I suppose the Genoharadan choose their agents well. This Hulas must be a contact for all sorts of assassin wannabes. It'd make sense that he doesn't give anything away. _Still, it was annoying.

"We don't make deals, Jen Sahara. You give yourself a lot of credit if you believe we'll organize a free trip for you. Why is it that you are in such a rush to leave Manaan?"

I shrugged, and decided on the truth. "I have some rather powerful people after me."

Hulas paused, his eyes darkening in shock, or surprise, or _something_. I stiffened. _Does Hulas know something about Bastila and Karon? _No, it couldn't, the Genoharadan would have nothing to do with the Jedi. Surely.

"The Genoharadan offers protection for its agents, Jen Sahara. But you are not one."

"I wish to be," I countered quickly.

"Even so, the wishing does not magically initiate you into our brethren. We have many trials, a long testing period-"

"Hulas," I hissed. "I am happy to do this sort of apprenticeship on another planet. But if you guys truly want me to be an agent, then get me off this planet within the next hour. If you can't achieve that, then I'm off – right now - to find someone who can."

Hulas sighed, and then to my surprise, capitulated. "Follow me. There are always civilian ships leaving to Rii'shn. I'll have an agent meet you there."

_Hrm, I was certain he was going to refuse. I guess the Genoharadan are really impressed with me. I wonder what they've heard. _I followed Hulas out of the cantina, noticing the brief nod he gave the Ithorian bartender. As we walked outside into the bright sunshine, HK-47 fell in behind me.

"Yours?" Hulas asked me abruptly, indicating the droid.

I nodded. "Yes. These days you can't live without a protocol droid. He'll need to come with me, too."

"A... protocol droid, you say?" Hulas' tone was slightly disbelieving as we moved across the peaceful courtyard.

"Statement: I am well versed in verbal and cultural translation," HK intoned from behind us. "I attempt to serve my master's every need."

"And these days protocol droids are equipped with laser rifles?" Hulas questioned mildly.

"One can never be too careful," I responded lightly.

"Well, you would not be our first agent with a personal droid," Hulas said after a short delay. "As long as he is kept under control, and doesn't break any laws-"

"Objection: I am a law-abiding droid!" HK cut in quickly. The robot seemed to think about this for a minute, and then further reiterated his point. "Yes, indeed, law-abiding, that's me." I wished his tone had been a little more convincing.

I bit back a snigger, and hurriedly moved to change the subject. "You mentioned the world Rii'shn? Where is that?"

Hulas paused, glancing at me sideways. _I've surprised him again. _"Rii'shn is the only other habitable planet in this system. I am astonished you have not heard of it. It is a mere four hour hyper-jump away."

My spine stiffened, and I stopped abruptly. "That's not far enough, Hulas."

"I gathered as much," he answered quickly, motioning for me to continue moving. "But it will do, for now. I will organize one of our agents to meet you there, and tell you of your first assignment. Which shall, of course, by on a different world again. Do not fear, Jen Sahara, the Genoharadan will get you away from your pursuers."

xXx

In the end, it had been as easy as I had suspected. Hulas had gifted me with a fake ID chip – enough to get me off this gods-forsaken planet. My new name – Alieya Djurr'yni – sounded a lot more exotic than Jen Sahara, but either way it was still a false name.

The civilian transport ship was packed with struggling merchants, and poor civilians looking for a cheap getaway. A suffocating stench of human sweat permeated my senses, and I struggled to keep from breathing through my nose. Crowded sentients were squashed into tiny seats all around me, talking and gesticulating in a myriad of languages. Considering almost half of the occupants were Selkath, their slurry, native tongue was the dominant noise. I resisted the urge to batter once more at Bastila's shields; strongly desiring the strength of the Force, if for nothing else than to drown out the senseless babble. As always, the power was dancing tantalizingly out of reach, teasing me with its intensity. As soon as I was safely off Manaan, I fully intended to deal with the snot's blockade.

I sighed, and stared out of the window. For all that Hulas had jacked me up with the lowest-class transport possible; at least I was seated with a view. I heard the engines power up as the ship readied to leave Ahto City, and could see crowds of departed family waving their loved ones farewell.

I couldn't make out faces in the congregation outside, but my eyes caught on one robed individual, as it slowly made its way to the front. The repulsors kicked in, humming loudly; but my vision stayed on the brown-clad figure. My skin prickled.

_That's Karon. I know it is. _The ship began to slowly rise, but still I gazed out the window, trying to distinguish features on a figure too far away to recognize.

Somehow, I knew, she was watching me too.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_Lord Valentai - Thanks :) I find it a little tricky to get inside Big Z's head... possibly because he doesn't say much of himself.  
Dark Lord Daishi - thanks for the continued encouragement :grin: Glad you liked the struggle over the Ebon Hawk, I reckonthe ship's got a curse on it... first takes damage from leaving Taris, then Jen plants explosives on it, then it gets impounded. Hrm, a bit like the Millenium Falcon... hadn't really thought of that connection before...  
snackfiend101 - Yeah, she's pretty good at mounting up enemies/pursuers :)  
Kosiah - Glad you liked it :)  
Lunatic Pandora1 - :evil grin:  
Firera - lol, canned Sith Lord! I bet that'd make a killing... :cough:. Hrm, romance, well... yeah there'll be at least one. Probably. :grin: At the moment I'm gettnig more inspiration for the Revan/Malak one, but my plan was always to include - a - romance.  
thesnowman - Glad you liked it :) The Sith actually played into Jen's hands, because the towing of the Ebon Hawk & subsequent struggle gave her more time to try and escape Manaan... here's what Jen does next.  
Red Mage Neko - :snigger: You have such an eloquent way with words :grin: - it'll get better... but not before it gets worse, I'm afraid.  
Prisoner 24601 - Thanks for the review :) I'm really glad you liked the Calo/Canderous standoff... I must admit I spent a lot of time on that fight (and was thinking about your earlier review when I wrote it). I've mentioned it before, but I really wanted to make something of Calo's downfall. He's a short, annoying midget, but I like him as a character. Carth (and Juhani) will gain more focus in the story later... there will be more details about Carth's past. I'm glad you liked what was already there._


	35. Jedi Talk

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter 35 – Jedi Talk**

_- Karon Enova -_

* * *

A heavy despair – mingled with a bitter relief upon which I did not wish to dwell – sat painfully on my shoulders as I watched the civilian transport lift, and leave the ocean world. I could sense my former apprentice's Force presence within the ship, and wondered what she was thinking as she made good her escape. 

_The transport was headed to Rii'shn. What bitter irony, the planet I had just departed. _Two choices lay before me, each one damning the other. Flights to Manaan's closest neighbour were abundantly frequent, and it would be an easy task to jump onto the next available passage and pursue Revan. But I had promised to complete a task for Roland Wann, and how could I leave Bastila Shan? The young Padawan had sounded desperate on the transmission I had received, despite the briefness of it. _The remaining Dantooine Council members were unsure of her survival, although Vrook was adamant she still lived. _Vrook Lamar was already on his way to Manaan, but his arrival wasn't due for another ten days.

I grimaced. The press of sentients around me began to disperse, as people slowly left the commercial landing pad. Loud talk hammered at me from all sides, but my thoughts were so chaotic that I did not need the Force to block the noise. My mind was active enough to drown out any surrounding conversation.

_I must stay. Bastila needs my counsel. And I already know that Revan and I shall soon meet again. _The premonition I'd received days ago haunted my every breath. There was no running from fate, but it seemed a cruel, wicked thing, to be taunted with the very nature of my downfall. _And all I know is that it will happen soon. And that Revan will be involved..._

…

_My skin ached and burned; the residue of a massive bout of Force induced lightening. The cool floor underneath my back was a blessing; yet it did not dull the agonizing pain pulsating from my ribs. My eyes were glued shut, and one hand rested protectively over my torso. Underneath my fingers, I could feel the cauterized edges of a fatal lightsaber wound._

_I barely had the strength to draw another breath, and I did not need to wield the Force to realize I was dying._

_I opened my eyes, and a bright red bar flared through my vision. A lightsaber; it's owner swathed in a black cloak. _A Dark Jedi has been my downfall? _I couldn't see my surroundings; everything behind the figure was a fuzzy blur._

"_It was you!" the stranger hissed in a tone wracked with emotion. I could not tell if it was horror, rage or grief, but I recognized the voice. Revan._

_My eyes widened, and I made out her shadowy face under the hooded robe. Sharp green eyes glared down at me accusingly, and her hand tightened on her sickly red lightsaber. _After everything that has happened, am I to die by the hand of my old apprentice?

…

The vision had faded then, and I inwardly damned the lack of detail. I could not even tell where it would occur, but intuitively I knew it would be soon – if I waited here, Revan would come to me. _Is that a destiny I cannot escape? Am I doomed to die? _

Only on a few, brief occasions in the past had I been able to glance into the future, and never so vividly as this. Premonitions by nature were not always infallible, but I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that soon, I would be facing Revan.

The guilt still sat with me; the musings of what could have happened, what might have been. I thought I'd worked through my feelings of inadequacy over the past few years, thought I was stronger, whole once more. I'd even, finally, agreed to train another apprentice; but all it took was one desperate transmission from Bastila Shan to stir my doubts and worries back into a frenzy. _Things might have been so different._

I allowed my thoughts to wander dangerously - it did no good to dwell on past mistakes, but sometimes one couldn't hold back the tide. If only Revan and Malak had been separated when we'd first found them on Talshion. _She'd been so angry, so hurt, so desperate when we finally put an end to their budding romance. _The Council said it was for the best, and I'd agreed; we all knew how dangerous such strong emotions were to Jedi. _And yet... _And yet at times I wondered what would have happened, had the Council let the young lovers be. _Would Revan have angrily disappeared to join the Republic cause? Would Malak have followed her so blindly? _That encounter was still so sharp and vivid in my mind, like it had occurred but yesterday...

…

"_...so while I understand the wisdom of that part, I am unsure why I was tested on it," Jedi Knight Kylah Aramai droned on, still talking excitedly to me about her recent successful trials. I knew I should be patient with her, but I did not understand why the new knight was singling me out for her questions and long-winded thoughts. _Perhaps she does so to each Master she comes across._ I had more pressing concerns weighing me down. It had been three weeks since the Council approved a plan of separating Knights Revan and Malak, and ensuring little future contact between them. Thirteen days since Revan had thrown a tantrum I had not seen the likes of since we removed her from Talshion. Eight days since I saw the broadcasted destruction of her homeworld by the Mandalorians, and ran desperately to Revan's quarters... to find her missing._

Surely she will come back. Why did she not seek me out? Where has she gone? _Part of me thought I knew the answer. Her crusade over the last year had been against the Council's inaction over the growing Mandalorian threat. _Surely she would not be so reckless as to disobey the Council? _Perhaps I no longer knew what my old Padawan was capable of._

"_Looks like a ship is coming in to land," Bastila Shan, Vrook's prize Padawan and regular companion of Kylah, commented. I squinted up into the summer sky to see a small transport shuttle swoop down to land. I held my breath. _Could it be her? Is she returning?

_I restrained myself from running eagerly to the small landing pad adjoined to the Enclave, and made my way sedately there instead. Knight Kylah was still chatting animatedly, with Bastila throwing in an occasional word. By the time I reached the ship, the door was already opening._

_A figure in brown robes stepped out, and despair punched me in the stomach, followed quickly by surprise as I recognized him._

"_Knight Malak!" I called in greeting, and walked forward. I noticed briefly that Bastila had tensed upon his appearance._

_Malak was rather good-looking, for a human, and always ready with a smile and a quip. Only marginally less talkative and yet more reckless than Revan, he often mirrored her moods. Presently, his brows were lowered, and an anxious, almost angry expression darkened his young face._

"_Master Karon," he acknowledged grimly, not bothering to greet Kylah or Bastila. "Where's Revan?"_

"_Malak, you should not be here," I rebuked. "I believe you have been assigned to a mission on Coruscant, your home Enclave. Why have you disobeyed the Council in coming here?"_

_He scowled. "Some things are more important than the Order, Karon! I won't leave her alone after Talshion! Answer the question – where is she? In her quarters?"_

_I heard Kylah gasp behind me. "Malak, you should not address a master so!"_

_His dark eyes flicked to the new Knight. "I'm not speaking to you, am I?" He sighed heavily as he turned to look at me again. "Look, Karon, the Council can lecture me to death afterwards. But I must see her! If you won't tell me where she is, then I'll find her myself." With that said, he brushed past me into the Enclave. I saw an angry, disapproving expression on Kylah's face, and a stiff, icy one on Bastila's._

_I closed my eyes briefly, and wondered how best to handle this. "She's gone, Malak." I heard gasps from the others; Revan's disappearance was not yet common knowledge._

_Malak stiffened at the Enclave entrance, and turned around slowly. "Gone? What do you mean, gone?" His voice was low, and almost dangerous._

"_She... vanished directly after the televised attack on Talshion. We do not know where she is."_

_All vestiges of colour disappeared from Malak's face. "You don't know where she is," he repeated slowly. "What do you mean, you don't know where she is? If she's left Dantooine, there's only place she will have gone!"_

"_Malak-"_

"_I can't believe this!" he burst out, running a hand angrily through his short, dark hair. "She's gone off to fight the Mandalorians, hasn't she? And you- and you all just let her?"_

"_Calm yourself!" Kylah intervened in a righteous tone, and inwardly I groaned._

"_Kylah, Bastila, can you leave me alone with Knight Malak please?" I said quickly, and focused on the enraged Knight. "Malak, she has not yet reported back to us, and we are still looking for her. Do not let your emotions affect your judgment."_

_He laughed bitterly. "Emotions? You really think this would have happened, if you hadn't forced us apart? Oh no, the Council's to blame for this, and I'm not going to sit around and wait until I hear she's been killed by some primitive Mandalorian bastard!" he spat out as he strode back towards his ship._

"_Malak!" I called desperately. "Please, do not do this! Calm down first, at least! The Council-"_

"_The Council can crucify me for all I care," he said coldly as he re-entered his ship. "Revan's always meant more to me than their backward judgment." The door closed ominously, and a sinking, wretched feeling overcame me as the shuttle slowly rose back into the sky. My eyes closed in bitter despair. _Rash as always. Revan, return home. Please.

"_I never did like that man," Kylah commented piously from behind me._

…

I wondered. Maybe if the two of them had been together when the Talshion's fate was broadcast, they would have listened to our counsel. _Maybe..._

I sighed heavily, and forced such futile scenarios from my head. What was done, was done. In retrospect my decisions over Revan's tutelage and future may have been flawed, but hindsight was always such a bitter window from which to view the past. _And yet, the pain of losing an apprentice sits with you always. _Daine refused to mentor another Padawan after his joined the cause of Exar Kun. Another good friend of mine disappeared completely, presumed dead, after the betrayal of his wife. I had not wanted to tutor Lars, but had caved under Vandar's insistence. _I should have listened to my heart. I was not ready, and only now I realize how unfair it is to Lars. _I had left him behind with our shuttle, unloading the few possessions we had brought with us.

I grimaced, suddenly disgusted with myself. _Why am I standing here like a buffoon, lamenting a past I cannot change? Bastila surely needs my counsel. _I sighed, and began striding in the direction of the Republic Base. When the distress signal and accompanying message from the Ebon Hawk had been received, I had known who was involved. _Unexplained explosion, indeed. But why is she running? _There could be only one reason – Revan thought I was her enemy. I pursed my lips, lost in thought as my feet strode over ferracrete foundations. _She remembers. How much, perhaps only Bastila knows._

The mind rebuild should have been complete, lasting. _But nothing is eternal. Perhaps it is the will of the Force. _It had been the worst experience I'd ever had; stripping my apprentice's mind back and rebuilding it with the identity of a dying casualty from the wars she herself had started. I'd had no choice – not only had the Council themselves agreed on the action taken, but I was the only master on Dantooine skilled enough to perform such an operation.

_If it had not been for Bastila's vision of the Star Map on Dantooine, then Revan would have had a real chance at redemption. _Originally we had planned to heal Revan naturally, over months, and attempt to guide the Sith Lord back to the light. No one had expected the young Bastila Shan to behold a vision of Revan and Malak entering Force tombs on Dantooine _that we did not even know about. _Suddenly, it became a lot more urgent to have a sane shell of the Sith Lord walking about, so we could mine that information if our team of Jedi Knights did not find the Star Maps themselves.

I had done the Council's will, but a dark seed of doubt over the outcome sat with me always.

xXx

A short message from an officer on my comm.-link informed me that the crew of the Ebon Hawk had already been escorted to the Republic embassy, despite the Selkath impounding their ship. That confused me somewhat; I didn't understand why the Selkath would be involved in a Republic rescue mission, though assuredly I would find out soon.

The embassy itself was situated on the northern side of the city, close to the Selkath Supreme Court and High Command. Despite the Selkath's protestations of neutrality, I knew they at times had background dealings with the Republic they kept secret from the Sith. _Even such a determinedly neutral species as the Selkath cannot blindly ignore the destructive nature of the Sith._

As I approached the complex, one Republic officer was berating two junior soldiers in a loud, annoyed voice.

"Your speeder was broken? Where is it? You can't mean to tell me you left it out there! Speak up, Ensign!" The officer had his hands resting angrily on his hips, his face mottled red in irritation.

"The escape pod was empty, sir. My speeder broke, and I thought I should report to you, sir," the soldier responded in a mechanical voice. I stiffened. There was something slightly wrong, even automated, about his voice.

"You already told me the pod was empty, man!" he yelled, and I wondered in distaste whether I saw spittle fly from his lips. "But where is your speeder? You should know the protocol by now, you shameless excuse for a soldier! We don't have an unlimited supply of vehicles on Manaan – the Sith pinch everything – so all broken parts are to be supervised until they can get towed! Get out there right now, and don't report back until you've brought the wreckage home!" The officer finished his long-winded rant in a sort of snarl, and left me wondering whether he actually needed oxygen. He turned on his heel angrily, and exited into the Republic compound.

My eyes narrowed as I saw a lost, bewildered look on the two soldiers left behind. _Hrm. It couldn't be, could it? _I strode over to them quickly, and intercepted the men before they could leave.

Injecting just a small amount of Force into my words, I addressed them mildly. "Tell me what happened when you came across the escape pod."

The soldier blinked and swallowed convulsively. "I, uh, I- the escape pod was empty, Master Jedi," he stammered. "My bike broke, and I had to ride double on Stirwin's." The second soldier was nodding dazedly in confirmation.

_It is as I suspected then. _Revan's strengths may have been in the more physical aspects of the Force, but she had certainly picked up a few things under my tutelage. In the early days, I had often doubted whether my training would suit her; I was a Sentinel, and awfully strong at mental manipulation, but I preferred to avoid outright conflict. However Revan was as adaptable as she was brilliant. Not only did she become one of the strongest Guardians in the history of our Order, but she also gained an impressive knowledge – and ability – of the more passive, subtler uses of the Force.

I grimaced, and drew more power in. "Your will is your own. You will remember what occurred."

The soldier's expression became even more dazed, if that was possible. Then, abruptly, it twisted into a confused anger. "Wh-what happened? Th-there was a woman!" The second soldier stumbled slightly behind him, and then a dawning awareness broke on his face also.

I smiled gently. "It is alright now. The woman is a Jedi, who was lost." That, in a sense, was true. "I will talk to your superior, and explain what happened. I would appreciate it if you could tell me everything that occurred first, however?"

The men quickly extrapolated on the encounter, and I wondered at how fortuitous it had been for Revan to find a speeder so easily. After assuring the soldiers that everything was under control, I turned to enter the embassy, subtly reaching out with the Force to scan the area. I sensed Bastila immediately, her presence shone from within the complex. What startled me immensely was the aura of another Force-user next to her. Bitter grief and guilt encompassed a compassionate, honourable heart, and I wondered in astonishment who that could be. _It feels familiar._ I lengthened my stride, and entered the embassy quickly.

"Master Jedi," one of the sentries greeted me as I walked through the huge foyer. Large, chrome pillars gave the place a classical style, akin to the rest of the Selkath architecture in Ahto City. An immense, bright holo-picture of Coruscant dominated the east wall, adding colour to an otherwise dreary foyer.

I nodded briefly at the Republic guard. "Perhaps you can lead me to the crew of the Ebon Hawk?"

"Certainly," the man assented. "Follow me."

We walked down one of the hallways, and the sentry stopped at the first meeting room. After activating the door switch, he stepped back and allowed me to enter.

Commander Wann, the current leader of the Manaan base, was busy talking animatedly to Bastila Shan and a man I recognized as the war hero Carth Onasi. They turned at my entrance, and I could not miss the flare of relief on the young Padawan's face as she spotted me.

But my attention was focused on the other inhabitants of the room, and my surprise intensified. A young Twi'lek girl sitting on a recliner was pouting rather petulantly, being comforted by a Wookiee of all things. _A Wookiee? _A small utility droid sat beeping at their feet. Behind them, a formidable Mandalorian wearing an awfully garish purple suit of armour stood scowling, an unlit cigarra hanging from his lips. I blinked. _How in the Force has Bastila managed to gather such an entourage?_

Then it hit me, of course. _People always flocked to Revan. Her leadership skills were perhaps only matched by her charisma. _My last surprise was the unknown Force user; a silent Cathar was standing in one of the far corners. My eyes widened. _That's Quatra's missing charge! Juhani!_

"Master Karon!" Bastila addressed me effusively, and I realized I was still standing in the doorway. I smiled wryly, and knew that even now, Revan could still surprise me.

"Padawan," I acknowledged softly, and strode forward to take her hands in greeting. "It is good to see you again." I noted the tense set of Bastila's shoulders relaxed somewhat, and realized she had not had an easy time.

"Master, allow me to introduce you to my companions," Bastila said quickly, recovering her composure. "This is Captain Carth Onasi, whom I am sure you have heard of."

"Master Jedi," the man intoned formally, but his intense eyes were on Commander Wann.

I smiled briefly. "Captain. So nice to see you again." I saw surprise flash over the Republic pilot's face, as he turned to look at me once more. I let out a small tinkle of laughter. "You perhaps do not remember me, Captain. We met but once, and I am sure most Jedi look the same to you."

A wry grin of agreement curved his lips as I turned back to face Bastila. She nodded towards the young Twi'lek, but I noticed her expression tense. _She does not like the girl, I wonder? _"This is Mission Vao, a refugee from Taris. Her companion is Zaalbar, also from Taris."

"Welcome to Ahto City," I murmured, but the girl merely nodded sulkily, her eyes trained on the floor. The Wookiee, however, appeared to be more courteous and rose to bow.

"(I greet you, Master Jedi,)" he rumbled.

My smile grew, and I wished I could emulate Shyriiwook better. Before I could address the Wookiee, Bastila moved on, obviously wishing to hurry the introductions.

"That is the mercenary Canderous Ordo," she said flatly, nodding towards the older warrior.

"Yo," he acknowledged dismissively, and glanced away to light his cigarra. I raised an eyebrow, but smiled anyway. Mandalorians were not particularly known for their manners, and I knew it would gall Roland Wann just to have one in residence.

"And I believe you know Juhani already?" Bastila ended on a soft note.

I turned to look at the Cathar, who did not meet my eyes. She was wearing a loose outfit of dreary white clothes, one hand plucking at the oversized shirt. My expression grew more gentle as I approached her. "Padawan," I said softly. "It warms my heart to see you here."

Juhani looked up then, tormented golden eyes staring into mine. A maelstrom of emotions warred through the Cathar's face as I reached for her hands and squeezed them lightly.

A small, nervous smile flicked at her lips. "Master Karon." Her voice was a mere whisper.

I wondered what had happened; Quatra had sensed her Padawan embracing the Dark Side in her Knight trials, but the woman who stood opposite me merely felt confused, even grief-stricken. While I could feel waves of anguish and resentment emanating from her, they did not dull the compassion and integrity that seemed to be at her core. _I did not approve of Quatra's methods. Even I had sensed the young Cathar had grown too attached to her master, but there are better ways to deal with as apprentice's love than to throw it in her face and test her on it. _The bitter aftermath had been the disappearance of not one, but two Padawans as Tefain's charge had vanished after a biting argument with Quatra herself. I'd walked in on the end of that confrontation, as the young human Padawan had stormed away after giving Quatra a piece of her mind. _Tefain still hasn't managed to track her down – but at least we have found Juhani._

"We will talk later," I promised Juhani. "For now, relax and have something to eat. I must convene with Bastila."

Juhani nodded, and I turned to approach Roland Wann. "Commander, perhaps you could organize quarters and food for all of Padawan Shan's companions? For now I wish to talk with Bastila alone."

Roland Wann nodded, although I could tell he was not happy. Like many of the high-ranking military stationed on bases that saw little action, Roland had become used to being in command, and did not like accommodating a Jedi. While I had no rank as far as the Republic was concerned, protocol demanded that they cooperate with us unless otherwise ordered. His narrowed eyes settled on the Mandalorian, who was leaning against the wall casually and flicking cigarra ash on the clean floor. I sighed inwardly.

"Of course," Roland muttered.

"(Maybe we could stay here for one night, Mission? At least for the meal?)" I heard the Wookiee say to his companion. I glanced at Bastila, who had pursued her lips.

"Come," I invited. "Let us talk for awhile."

Roland stopped me briefly as I headed to the exit. "But what about the escape pods? I thought there had been some survivor who had ejected from the Ebon Hawk?" he demanded.

"It's under control," I returned briefly. "You can call the search off, Commander." Six intent and shocked faces swivelled around to stare at me.

"Under control?" the young Twi'lek burst out. "What do you mean by that? Do you know where Jen is? Tell me!" She had leapt to her feet, an aura of intense determination around her.

Bastila shot a scandalized look at Mission, but turned to question me regardless. I noticed that even Carth had stopped haranguing Commander Wann to pay attention. _Revan certainly made an impact on this lot._

"Do you know where Jen is?" Bastila asked quietly.

"Not yet," I answered, glancing seriously at everybody in turn. "But I will soon. Bastila, let us leave." I motioned Bastila out and followed before the impassioned Twi'lek could erupt once more.

xXx

"For all that I need the reprieve, Master Karon," Bastila started, as soon as we had entered a more private setting. "Shouldn't we be going after Jen?"

I noted that she still used Revan's false name, even in a secure room. I knew that this particular meeting room was completely devoid of sensors, and my Force ability was currently soundproofing the room against any potential eavesdroppers.

The meeting room itself was fairly large; a long, circular table stretched out impressively, and I surmised Roland liked to hold many officious meetings here. Bastila herself appeared more comfortable to stand and pace across the fluffy grey carpet, but I sat down and picked up a piece of fruit laid out in a succulent platter. I wondered just how to word the next bit of information.

"She has left the planet already Bastila," I said simply. Sometimes the bare truth was the best way to handle a situation.

Blank shock dulled the lustre of her eyes, and the colour drained her face. "Then we must go after her, immediately!" she burst out. "Where has she gone?"

For all that I felt the bitterness of Revan's escape myself, I could not hold back a chuckle. "Sit down, Bastila, and relax. Your dedication to duty does you credit, particularly since it must have been a thankless task indeed."

Bastila's mouth dropped open at what she probably considered a blasé attitude for a very serious matter. "But we cannot just let her roam free!"

I sighed. "I know. Trust me, I am working on it. I have people already investigating where she went. But she could be anywhere; until we have some solid leads there is no point rushing out blindly into space." I did not want to tell her of my vision; the young woman had enough resting on her shoulders as it was.

"If you do not know where she has gone, then how do you know she has left the planet?" Bastila questioned, sitting down reluctantly.

"I sensed her depart. She was my apprentice, Bastila. I have spent years in the past trying to track her and Malak down from their escapades." A wry smile curved my lips in remembrance; thoughts of Revan invariably granted me a wide range of emotions, encompassing everything from grief, anger, and even love.

I noticed Bastila glance around the room surreptitiously as I named the Sith Lord, and realized what she was thinking. "It is safe to talk here, Bastila. No one will hear."

She nodded her acquiescence, and stared down at the table. "What now, then?"

"Perhaps a chance to meditate and relax, Bastila," I suggested softly. _While I venture to explore the mining facility, like I promised Roland? _My premonition told me that Revan would return to Manaan soon, did I really want to be lurking on the bottom of the ocean when she arrived back on the planet? "Your master is on his way here also; he shall arrive in less than two weeks."

At that, Bastila jerked her head up, a surprised smile lighting her face. "Master Vrook is alive? Coming to Manaan?"

My smile warmed further; it was good to see the Padawan held her master in such high regard. _Of course. She has not yet returned to Dantooine; she may not have known whether he still lived. _"Yes. He was delighted to hear of your survival – as were we all, Padawan. You have done well."

"Well?" Bastila's expression dropped in self-doubt. "I have failed. Revan is out there, unguided, alone, up to who knows-"

"Bastila," I cut her off gently. "You are too harsh on yourself. You should never have been placed in this position, and you were never meant to be alone. I, of all people, understand how hard to is to deal with Revan, and knowing somewhat of both your personalities I doubt you two would have warmed to each other. She cannot be commanded, and she often does not listen to sense. She-" I stopped short, and closed my eyes briefly as I halted my train of thought. "But that is not important. What I do need to know, however, is how much she remembers. How is she acting?"

Bastila tensed visibly as she answered. "She has become rather unbalanced. A seething mass of emotions. When I first encountered her, she showed compassion and- and a rather annoying sense of amusement. Then there was a time when I thought the identity of Jen Sahara had returned, but ever since Tatooine she has been behaving psychotically." She shrugged helplessly. "I have no other word for it. All I can sense from her is rage and desperation, and now she knows how to shield me from her mind."

My eyes narrowed at that; I understood the power and limits of the mind-link Bastila shared with Revan, and it was not good that Revan was beginning to discover it for herself. _No one expected Bastila Shan to form a bond with my erstwhile padawan. _It had been created when Bastila had preserved the spark of life within Revan's dying body, but she herself had not been aware of it until the first vision.

I motioned for Bastila to continue, and she did so haltingly. "She is starting to remember. Her dreams are awfully fragmented, but she is recalling flashes of her past."

"Before or after the fall?" I asked softly, but my tone was deadly serious. _If she is remembering her childhood, then perhaps there is hope for redemption. If, however, the stronger memories are of her time as the Sith Lord... _

Bastila looked like she did not understand why it was so important. "Both. I do not believe she has any idea of her true identity, but her Force abilities are increasing in power and intensity. She has little control over it, but her strength is returning." She closed her eyes, and I could feel a small surge of fear from her. _Bastila has stood up well, being forced to babysit a volatile ex-Sith Lord. _Again, I realized how unfair circumstances had been upon the young padawan.

"That is worrying," I said heavily, more for the lack of a better response. _If Revan recalls her dark heritage, and is acting more and more violent and selfish, then perhaps I already know my murderer. And perhaps redemption is long passed her._

"Worrying?" Bastila countered sharply. "It is more than worrying. If she returns to her apprentice's side..."

"She will not," I interrupted. "You forget - Malak betrayed her. He would not allow her to return. And she would not work with him again. Even as the Dark Lord of the Sith, I still felt her grief at his betrayal during the mind rebuild." That had been the only sane emotion I had sensed from the fragments of her mind. That such a strong love could be destroyed so completely showed just how corrupting the Dark Side truly was. And yet the fact that she grieved flared my hope for her redemption.

"Why did the council decide to rebuild her mind? Surely- it would have been safer- to, to-"

"To what, Bastila?" I rubbed a hand over my short horns wearily. "To imprison her with the Senate, and lead her to assured execution? To kill her ourselves? We value life, and you are the very one who saved her and made that choice. Like it or not, Revan owes her life to you alone." I paused briefly. "As for the mind rebuild- well, we needed the information on the Star Maps. We still do - we have no idea where on Kashyyyk or Korriban the maps could be, and the latter would be almost impossible to infiltrate even if we did know. No, we needed information that only Revan knew, and her mind was too fragmented to allow any other course of action."

Bastila sighed. "But then why is she recalling her past with such clarity? She knows she is not Jen Sahara - that façade had already crumbled away. It is only a matter of time before she finds out who she really is."

I felt my lips pursing, and knew that to be the truth. "Perhaps. But things are not always as hopeless as they seem. Trust in the Force, Bastila." I had to do that myself.

She nodded reluctantly as I glanced at the east wall. Behind it, I knew, was a pacing Cathar I still had to see. I smiled again at Bastila. "It is a good thing you have done, returning Juhani to the Order. I am keen to talk to her, although I must confess there are many who believed she would never be seen again. I can sense the turmoil within her, but she is not lost to the darkness. Not anymore. I commend you."

Bastila dropped her head, and I realized with a shock that the credit did not belong to her. She closed her eyes wearily. "I did not find her, Master Karon. Revan did," she said succinctly.

A sudden spark of hope shot through me. "Really? Revan redeemed Juhani?" _Maybe all is not lost then. I should have more faith in the Force._

Bastila swallowed, but her next words were terse. "I would not quite say that. They fought on Tatooine – I believe Juhani challenged her – and Revan returned with Juhani in tow."

"But that is good news! If Revan could make someone-" I stopped myself, realizing just what Bastila had said. "Tatooine? What where you doing there?"

Bastila blinked, as if something had occurred to her. "I-I tried to go the Dantooine after leaving Taris, but we exited hyperspace in the middle of the Sith attack," she explained hurriedly. "We had to leave, our ship was damaged – Carth chose a pre-programmed hyperspace jump – we ended up on Tatooine."

"And?" I prompted. _Tatooine? There is no such thing as coincidence._

"And I found the Star Map," she ended simply.

I could feel the joy blossoming on my face; the warmth of hope filling me once more. "Well done, Padawan. You have the coordinates?" She nodded, and I continued. "It appears the Force led you there, then. And now to Manaan? Why did you choose this destination?"

A frown pleated her face as she chewed on her lip. "I-I do not really know, Master. Revan was planning to run on Tatooine – I convinced her to travel with me to a neutral place, one where there was no other Jedi. Manaan was the first one I thought of. I-I guess she somehow found out about your appearance here."

I nodded; obviously that had been the case. "And yet, you have journeyed to the location of another Star Map. It would appear that the Force is leading you, Bastila. This was always your mission, and now I wonder if you are destined to complete it." Perhaps this way Roland Wann's request could be satisfied, without me leaving the surface of Manaan. The situation in the mining colony sounded dire, and I understood the need for prompt investigation. _Fortunately, the location of the Star Map is within the Hrakert Rift – right next to the station. _If only we knew more about the whereabouts of the Maps on Kashyyyk and Korriban.

Bastila's lips parted in mute astonishment. "I-I had thought to rest awhile, Master Karon."

I looked at the woman then, and for the first time noticed the drawn lines around her expressive eyes. _She is not tired so much as exhausted. _"Yes, I understand, Bastila. And while I do not deny you a day of rest, this mission is important. I will take care of Revan when she returns, but your task will be to travel to the Hrakert Station." I would tell more of what was happening after she had slept; and I would see to it that some of her companions at least accompanied her.

A determined look tightened her face and she nodded at me. "I will do my duty, Master Karon. I- wait, did you say _when_ Revan returns?"

"Yes," I answered softly. "For she will, and perhaps it is time to give you a break from dealing with her, hrm?"

A small smile curved the woman's face, and I once more noted the look of relief flash through her eyes. "Master Karon, a few hours of sleep would be ample. I have slept recently, and would prefer to get started on this quest."

"Fair enough, Padawan, but please ensure you _are_ rested. There are more details I need to impart to you about Hrakert Station, but for now I will let you relax while I talk to Juhani."

Bastila's smile turned compassionate, and I sensed that she felt for the Cathar. "Thank you," she said softly, and I inclined my head.

"Thank _you_, Bastila. You have done much already."

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_thesnowman - Here's the next instalment, things are still heating up :grin:   
Kosiah - Glad you like the parallel flashback, there's going to be another, hopefully more powerful one, in a few chapters time. Thanks again for the links :) I have a feeling they are going to be really helpful.  
Data - Thanks. Here's what Karon does next:)   
snackfiend101 - Oh yeah, the crew ain't too happy :) You'll start to see where I'm going with this in the next few chapters... :evil laugh:  
Dark Lord Daishi - Very valid questions... here's the answer to one of them :)  
Lunatic Pandora1 - Too true!  
Red Mage Neko - Yep, it just looks like things are getting worse for ole Rev...:ominous music plays:  
Lord Valentai - thanks as always :)_


	36. Echoes of the past

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

**_Author's Note: many thanks to Kosiah for the beta._**

* * *

**Chapter 36 – Echoes of the Past**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

The passage seemed to drag. Hulas had told me it was only a four-hour hyperjump, but it felt like I'd already spent half a day crammed in a transport ship that reeked worse than a Wookiee's breath. I was pressed up against the window by a heavyset Duros, who had finally stopped initiating conversation after I'd threatened to gut him. _That was real slick. I have the subtlety of a Gamorrean prostitute. _I wrenched my thoughts away from that ludicrous image quickly, before it could stick. 

I felt pressed in, claustrophobic. Children were squalling in a variety of languages, playing on my tense nerves and rising temper. My head was still pounding, and it was hard to stay focused. Flashes of people and places shot randomly through my mind. I closed my eyes in despair and breathed in deeply. Consciousness faded.

…

"_Let's get outta here!" he hissed from his vantage point by the doorway. "We've got what we need, so let's go!"_

Man, it's not like I'm gonna get caught. I **never** get caught._ But he had, once. He'd never told me what the bastards did to him – they called themselves the Enforcers, but in reality their only job was to ensure no Uncitizen left the Western Underground. I'd seen them slaughter countless of the hungry, starving homeless in the name of their 'duty'. _

_Still, to this day, he wouldn't tell me how he escaped. Perhaps I didn't really want to know._

"_Got a cit ID chip," I grinned, as I pocketed my tools and a stash of credits._

"_It's not like that's much use to us," he muttered. "We're not registered on the NCD, remember?"_

_I closed the locker, and stood up. "Sod the National Citizen Database. It's all a load of bullshit anyway. Telling us we don't have the right to live because of where we're born." I could feel myself scowling. The injustice of my homeworld always stirred my anger, but not his. Not anymore. Somehow, he seemed to have grown resigned to it. Not quite acceptance, but a close cousin._

"_It's the way it works, little gal," he quipped as I walked over to him. "You can't change the system."_

"_Don't call me that," I said automatically. "And that's such a copout. Just accepting things 'cause they've always been like that."_

_He shrugged, motioning me out as he closed the door. We were thieving in one of the poorer parts of Altizir, which meant less of a haul, but also a smaller chance of being caught. Considering the grim consequences of exposure, it really was our only option if we wanted to eat. It would have sat better with me if we'd looted some rich bastard's joint instead, but I always made sure not to take everything. Only what we needed to survive._

"_Well, maybe one day you can change the world," he muttered, grinning wryly at me as we walked quickly through the abandoned apartment building._

"_Well maybe I can!" I retorted. "Stang! Why do you always make fun of my views?"_

"'_Cause they're dangerous views, I guess." He grabbed my hand suddenly, stopping me in my tracks just before the back exit we'd come in through. "I couldn't stand it if anything happened to you." His eyes had darkened in intensity, and I felt a warmth stab deep through my belly. This was all still so new - so wonderful and terrifying at the same time - that it didn't always feel like it was really happening to me. To us._

_His other hand moved to cup the side of my face, its comforting warmth sending unbidden shivers down my back. Humour crinkled his young face, and I wondered if he could sense my uneasiness. He'd always been able to read my thoughts._

_A grinding noise startled me, and a lead weight plummeted through my stomach as I recognized it. The sound of that half-broken side door opening. Blank shock dulled his dark eyes, and he wrenched me behind him abruptly. _

Be calm, _my mind muttered swiftly. _It's probably just a normal cit' who'll ignore us.

"_We have been looking for you," a voice said mildly. My throat dried up, but I jumped out from behind the safety of his back regardless, brandishing a dull, chipped shiv that was my only weapon. _I ain't going down without a fight!

_To my utter surprise, the figures standing before us weren't clothed in the loose blue and silver uniform of the Talshion Enforcers. Instead, all three of them were draped in dull brown robes - like clerics or something - and their body language was relaxed. The leader, who had spoken, was a female of some race I'd never seen. Two small, sharp horns protruded from her forehead, and her eyes blazed a brilliant turquoise against her dark skin._

_I blinked. "Who the frell are you?"_

…

"Hey, wake up."

Something prodded me in the side, and awareness flared, followed immediately by a heavy pounding in my head. I bit back a groan; the lingering headache seemed to be getting worse. I turned to glare at my neighbour, who was retracting the offending arm from my side. "Sorry," the Duros said mildly. "You were muttering in your sleep. Sounded like a nightmare."

I nodded once, and winced. _Damn this! _My arm ached, my head throbbed, and my vision was fuzzy and unclear. The last thing I needed was to be inundated with flashbacks from one of my pasts. _At least I know that Karon woman is from Street Kid's past. Figures. Damn these riddles in my head._

The Force was still teasing me with possibilities, promising me with power. I couldn't stop the longing to reach out, and as I did so I slammed straight into Bastila's walls. _Bitch!_

_**Jen? Are you listening? Please, you have to come back!**_

"You okay miss?" the Duros repeated. His grating voice stabbed into my ears. "We're almost there. Just an hour away."

My head pounded, my vision blurred...

…

"_Only one hour until we reach the Genoas system, my Lord," a man said. He was dressed in a formal military uniform, with Admiral pips on the shoulders. Funny, it almost looked like a Sith uniform._

"_Excellent." I strode across a large command deck, staring out at the flaring stars. "It starts, Admiral. Soon we shall create a new order. Never again shall we be at the mercy of any threat like the Mandalorian scum."_

_The Admiral turned to look at me; an older man, lines of age pitting his face. His hair grew white under a ridiculous military hat. _Honestly, I really need to change that ludicrous uniform._ His eyes were serious and intelligent, and he opened his mouth to speak._

_Something prodded me in the side. Man and starship dissolved._

…

"Huh?" I mumbled.

"You gotta pull yourself together, lady," someone was muttering. Belatedly, I recognized my annoying neighbour. _I should silence him. _No, a civilian ship was not a good place to start a fight. _I don't want to hurt him, he's trying to help!_

"The Selkath won't let you into Emnaad if they think you're stimmed up," the Duros was saying. _What is he jabbering about? _"Here, have some of this."

I stared at the Duros; really looked at him this time. Odd, he seemed to be sincere as he held out a small syringe.

My eyes narrowed. "What the frell is that?"

"Shhh!" he hissed. "It's just an energy booster. Clears your mind, sorta thing. Looks like you could use it." I could see the red veins in his big, bulbous black eyes. _He's a junkie. Stoned up to his ugly eyeballs. _And yet, he was offering me a solution to my unstable dizziness.

"I'll be fine," I said shortly, and turned away. I wanted him to stop talking so I could think. _I commanded an admiral? How crazy is that? Can I really believe all these memories? _Well, it was obvious that I had been powerful. _Really? And maybe next I'll dream I'm the head of the Senate. _I snickered, and the Duros looked marginally offended.

"Come on, it's only Gree Spice! And you won't get into Emnaad if you keep blacking out."

I shrugged, annoyance winning out. _Why not, it'll make him shut up. And I won't make it to the Genoharadan if I keep fainting._

_You always were too reckless, _someone muttered. _Always too quick to jump into situations, without a thought for the consequences._

"Emnaad?" I questioned as I took the proffered needle. "What's that?"

A prick in my arm, the feeling of salvation.

"It's the main Selkath colony on Rii'shn. Y'know, the Selkath have to live in domes, the planet's too cold for them. The rest of the place is Czerka mining colonies, all sorts of temporary towns where the Exchange hang out. People disappear, all the time." The Duros was rambling, and I wondered that I hadn't picked up on his state earlier. "The Selkath keep things pretty peaceful and controlled in Emnaad. Bloody hard to find any spice around."

"So why are you going there?" I countered. My head cleared marginally, and my thoughts calmed down. Everything seemed less important. My fragmented memories and lost past reduced in importance; I'd made it this far without knowing who I was. Why did it really matter?

_**Jen?**_

Heh, Bastila was still talking to me. Funny, I wasn't so angry at her anymore. But I wanted what she continued to deny me. The Force. _Let's think about this rationally. I can break through her shields, one step at a time._

_**No!**_

_I've done it before, right?_

**_Jen, I- I. _**Bastila sighed. **_I'll let you have access to the Force, if you tell me where you are going._**

I thought about that for a moment, clearly and logically. _But if I tell you that, then you'll find me. I don't want that, right?_

A sense of astonishment radiated from her. **_What's wrong with you? _**

The Duros was grinning idiotically at me. _I think I have concussion. I wonder if taking spice was such a good idea, after all._

_**Spice? **_

"How long does this last?" I asked curiously. It didn't really matter. Things were so much clearer now. It didn't matter whether I was Evil Bitch, or Street Kid, or Jen Sahara... no, I couldn't possibly be Jen. Everything seemed to point to Evil Bitch. She was the strongest, right?

The Duros giggled. "It'll probably wear off by the time you're in Emnaad. Doesn't last long, shame. If you want more, I'll need some credits." He hiccupped, and a sane part of me realized he'd taken more than just an energy booster himself. _He's probably on glitterstim. _It didn't matter, he seemed to be happy. _Of course it matters, you moron! Snap out of it! This guy could get us into trouble! _No, it didn't really matter.

**_Spice?! _**Bastila sounded outraged and incredulous. I giggled. She was funny like that. **_I-I cannot- I will not deal with this anymore._** A sort of weary resignation emanated through the mind-link.**_ You forge your own path, Jen._**

The touch of her presence against mine faded, and part of me was surprised. _She left? What happened to the overbearing, neurotic woman determined to manipulate and betray me to her masters?_

Apathy and relaxation overcame me, and the feeling drifted away, superfluous. My thoughts cleared, and everything seemed so simple, so easy to understand. I'd spent so much time raging at the unknown without doing anything about it. So many days until I'd finally left the others. Of course, Bastila still had control over me. _Time to do something about that._

I drew my mind back to my first encounter with Juhani. I'd confronted her as a meek, empty shell, and walked away alive, invigorated, and furious. Somehow during our duel I'd shattered Bastila's shields in the midst of rage. My eyes closed, and I heard the faint giggle from my happy neighbour, overlaid with the heavy noise of too many people confined into a too small a ship.

Images danced through my mind, as clear as if they happened yesterday. _Well, it wasn't really that long ago, if you think about it. _It felt like a lifetime. I could see Juhani, facing me, a feral snarl twisting her features. Despair lurked in the recesses of her amber eyes. Odd, I hadn't noticed the despair before.

_How did I break through Bastila to reach the Force? _Rage had overcome me at Juhani's attack. Fear for myself, fear for Mission. I tried to rekindle that anger, rekindle the fury that constantly blazed within me. For the first time, the fury wouldn't rise. Maybe it was the 'energy booster', maybe my exhaustion. My eyelids drooped. A kaleidoscope of colours stretched outwards, encompassing me. Odd, I felt like I was floating. I couldn't see the transport ship anymore, just small flickers of life dotted around me. A thick cord of bright white dazzled me, blinded me. It seemed to connect me to someone else. I followed.

…

_I will not think of it anymore. I will not think of her._ Master Karon had advised me to trust in the Force, and in a way it was a relief to let go of the incessant worry, the continuing darkness suffocating me through that cursed bond.

The glistening walls of the Republic Embassy engulfed me as I strode back towards my assigned room. Karon had gone to see Juhani; I dearly hoped the Cathar would find some peace. The end of the opulent corridor twisted back towards the exit of the embassy, and a flash of blue darted past. _Mission? _Followed by a lumbering Wookiee.

I sighed internally. _So they are leaving. _I didn't really expect anything else; the duo certainly hadn't tagged along because of my presence. For all that the impressionable Twi'lek seemed to do nothing but irritate, part of me worried what trouble she would run into out on the streets of Ahto City.

_It is not like she would listen to me. If she wants to leave, I cannot do anything to stop her. It is better she does not get any more involved with my quest. _I wondered briefly how much longer Canderous would stay around. _He will be off soon, no doubt._

The door to my room swished open, and I walked inside with a feeling of relief. A small meditation mat adorned a polished chrome floor, next to a large bed that begged to be used. My eyes snagged on the comfortable mattress, and although I berated myself internally, I could not stop my feet from walking towards it. _I should meditate first. _The bed's soft comfort engulfed me as I lay down, and a weary sigh escaped. _Perhaps I need rest first. _Karon wanted me to travel to Hrakert Station, and so I would. This time, I would not fail in my duty.

_**Whoa, this is surreal.**_

My body tensed as shock sparked through me.

…

I felt myself forcibly hurled from Bastila's mind, and the Jedi faded. _Were those actually her thoughts? _Bastila's angry indignation wafted after me, and then suddenly her presence vanished. Like she deliberately blocked it.

I was flying away from her mind, back along the thick cord. _Is that the bond? _I'd never seen it before; it looked so pretty. _Stang. What sort of moron was I, taking spice like a crazed idiot? _The voice was a familiar sneering whisper; quiet and less powerful than usual.

The Force sparkled around me, like viewing fireworks from a distance. I felt so lethargic, so, so... _at peace. _Everything was alright. And suddenly I saw it for the first time. Remnants of Bastila; a barrier between me and the Force. The shield I'd slammed into countless times, and shattered only twice. It was pure Force energy itself; humming thick with life. Fashioned into a net, cascading tightly around me. _No matter how I try, I can't draw on the Force with that thing in the way._

_How ironic that a barrier of Force energy would keep me from accessing Force energy. _Now that was a curious thought. _What if I...?_

I tugged gently at the barrier, drawing it in the way I usually pulled on the Force in my surroundings. It gave a little; crumbled. I tugged harder.

It shattered.

Without realizing it, I was holding my breath, waiting for a shrewish mental scream from Bastila. My eyes flew open, and I found myself back in the cramped ship. Noise and smell slammed into my senses, then muted as the Force flooded through me. Powerful, intoxicating, healing. A bigger rush than a syringe could offer. _Is that it? Is that all I have to do, to break her shield? _The passive way certainly was a lot easier.

Still no response from the snot. Maybe she had fallen asleep, at last. _Now that's a good idea. Maybe when I wake up, the effects of this drug will have worn off. _I closed my eyes again, content for the first time in a long, long while.

xXx

I was rudely awoken later, by a Selkath jerking on my shoulders.

"Wake up!" he hissed. "We have landed. You need to leave."

I prised open grimy eyelids as familiar aches surged back into existence. My weak arm, reminding me of its poor condition. My head, throbbing with a dizzy pain. I gasped in a breath, tentatively drawing on the Force. I called to it, and it answered. I couldn't sense Bastila, but the Force swirled through me inviting, begging to be used.

I smiled. Finally, something was going right. My Duros companion had already left, and I noted the transport was remarkably empty. The Selkath scowled, his amphibian features wrinkled in annoyance. _It's time to get moving._

I disembarked, picking up HK from the droid storage unit. The datapad Hulas had given me lay heavy in my pocket, detailing where and who to meet. Interestingly, the meeting place wasn't in the domed city. Hulas had given me a small purse of credits, enough to order a taxi-shuttle to a nearby mining village. There was no time to lose; even on Rii'shn I felt too close to Bastila and her little Master.

The commercial port was situated on the outskirts of Emnaad, outside the major dome. Exits into the city were heavily guarded by Selkath authorities, and my eyes flicked over a stimmed Duros being searched and arrested. I restrained from sniggering, mentally berating myself for taking his offer in the first place. Part of me still felt woozy despite my grasp of the Force; whether it was due to the spice or the escape pod crashing, I didn't know.

Smirking to myself, I strode towards a nearby taxi.

xXx

It was freezing. An icy wind blew straight through my armour, chilling me to the bone. The hills behind the ramshackle town were dusted in white, and I began to understand why the Selkath did not set foot outside of Emnaad. _They probably wouldn't last longer than an hour out here. _I might not either, if I didn't find some shelter.

"Observation: The designated cantina is up ahead, master." HK pointed out. I squinted, and made out a lurid pink sign stating 'The Lady's Garter' in bright Basic. A human followed by a protocol droid were busily entering, and I wondered if it was the only popular place around here. The mining town was an odd mixture of old and new technology; half the buildings looked as if one gale would blow them over. In this weather, it would probably happen soon.

A few sentients were out in the elements, but it was a far cry from the bustling noise of Manaan. My doomed flying companion had warned me the Exchange and Czerka controlled these areas, so in a way it wasn't surprising the Genoharadan wanted to meet here. _Scumbags attract scumbags. And when you've got a whole bunch of them together... who knows what could happen._

I spotted a Rodian nearby who was backed up against a wall, surrounded by a Bothan and two Gamorreans. His desperate eyes fixed on mine, and I looked away quickly, focusing back on the cantina. _I should help. _No, I needed to stay out of trouble, and get to the cantina. Why should I help a pathetic weakling, anyway?

"(I didn't know!)" the Rodian objected, his voice frantic and high-pitched.

"You expect me to believe that you were unaware your best friend and partner was going to betray Tasoan?" the Bothan sneered.

"No one betrays the Exchange," one of the Gamorreans grunted.

_No one should be cornered like that. _I gritted my teeth, and walked on.

"(He said he was loyal! He did!)" the Rodian gasped.

…

"_I am loyal! I swear it!" The woman gasped as I lifted her in the Force, slamming her hard against the wall behind._

"_Tell me who betrayed me," I snarled viciously, my rage fuelling the Force thrumming and pulsing through my body._

…

I shook my head, stumbling against HK as I strove to clear the fogginess from my mind. _I've had that vision before. _I pulled on the Force, for no reason other than to feel its glorious power surge through me.

"Are you looking for trouble?" a snarl from behind, and I turned to see the Bothan and his Gamorrean henchmen glaring at me.

"No trouble," I said flatly, I heard a whirring of HK's gears as he focused on the new potential threat.

The Bothan turned back to his captive, muttering something about drunks under his breath. The Rodian was still gazing at me with pleading eyes, and my fists clenched. _No, dammit! I will not turn into some sort of simpering little Jedi, helping out everyone in need! This is beneath me! _

I walked on, pushing away a dark, sinking feeling. The thugs had gone back to interrogating the Rodian, and the icy wind blew his words to my ears, torturing me with my decision.

"(I really don't know!)" he pleaded. "(You have to believe me!)"

…

"_I do not know! I wasn't part of it!"_

_I could hear the sincerity in her tone. She was of no use to me then, and I was not in the mood to be sparing. I squeezed my fist, and her neck yanked to the side. An audible snap_ s_ounded through the room. _Now that was a waste. That sort of carelessness is more often displayed by my apprentice; _I berated myself ruefully as I exited the room, stepping over the twitching body. _My apprentice... _No, he couldn't be the one who betrayed me. Not him._

…

"Query: Master, is your watery shell malfunctioning?" HK's metallic voice snapped me back to reality yet again. _Frell! This just keeps happening! _This was the first time I'd experienced a recurring memory... or vision... or whatever those flashes really were. An iron band was pushing in against my temples, but I couldn't stop for rest. The Genoharadan were waiting.

"I'll be fine, HK," I muttered. There was an ominous silence behind me, and I twisted around to look for the Exchange thugs. The street was deserted.

I grimaced. _I guess they decided to do their little interrogation elsewhere. Damn it, maybe I should have helped him._

A thickset Nikto guarded the entrance of the cantina, ostensibly holding a large blaster rifle. Small, pointed horns lined the side of the bouncer's leathery face, and the reddish tint to his skin belied the fact he belonged to the most common branch of Nikto; the Kajain'sa. _That's odd. Nikto usually work for the Hutts. I wouldn't expect one to be a bouncer in a Czerka controlled village. _His sharp eyes focused on me as I approached, and he smiled ferally. All I could see was the baring of teeth.

He grunted, pointing his gun in HK's direction.

"No droids allowed inside," he growled. My brows lowered. _What is it with cantinas and this no droid policy? Anyone would think HK was planning to blow the place up. _My eyes slid to the dark red combat droid, whose intent gaze was pinning the Nikto... hostilely. _Heh. Maybe I can't blame them._

"(Observation: This meatbag looks like the bastard offspring of a diseased Hutt,)" HK stated boldly, in a language I understood but could not identify. The menacing tones of the odd language struck me first, and then the insult registered. I stiffened, and my vision snapped back to the Nikto. "(Which doesn't say much for his mother,)" HK finished.

_What the Force is he doing?_ The Nikto merely looked bored, as he waited for me to send my droid away. HK stared back at me. "(Extrapolation: The guard doesn't understand me. Master, I observed a droid entering this establishment as we walked down the street. Conclusion: He is trying to separate us. This might be a trap. Suggestion: I can easily blast this meatbag now, master.)"

HK's words washed through me, and surprise was chased away by irrational anger. My muscles clenched, and I instantly grasped the Force. _No one traps me! _Somehow I had the common sense – or maybe self-preservation – to grin and nod agreeably at the guard. _Calm down. HK's psychotic – can I really trust his instincts?_

"Go back to the hotel, HK," I said mildly to the droid. "This time, make sure you find the back entrance." We didn't have a hotel. I hoped HK would pick up on my meaning. _This is going to mean trouble if he's wrong. _A cynical part of me pointed out that the worse trouble was if he was correct. _Oh yeah._

HK stared at me with his piercing red gaze. "(Affirmation: At once, master,)" he responded, and strode away. I smiled more confidently than I felt at the alien, who stared back, impassive, and moved aside to let me pass. The lurid pink of the tacky neon sign shone brightly over my face for a brief moment.

The bar inside was fairly deserted, and I was beginning to see that cantinas looked the same all over the galaxy. This particular place was occupied by the same type of ruffians who populated Javyar's cantina back on Taris. My eyes sharpened on a human who was lurking in the corner, nursing a drink as his droid sat powered down next to him. _Right. No droids allowed. _I could feel my fingers curling into fists.

A wide door marked 'Private' at the back of the room was guarded by a type of alien I didn't recognize. _So much for being the culture know-it-all. _I hadn't realized how reliant I'd become on this hidden knowledge of my past, this innate ability to speak languages and recognize cultures and technology, even though I had no idea where it came from.

_Alright, time to plan. _I drew further on the Force, and reached out with it. _I can do this. _Once before, unintentionally back on Tatooine, I'd done it. _I can use the Force to sense... _My head cleared further, and I felt more alive than I had for days. Faint sparks of life registered around me, and with a sudden boost of confidence I realized I was sensing the drunken inhabitants of The Lady's Garter through the Force.

The guard further ahead straightened, looking at me suspiciously. He was dark skinned, hairless, and the faint light glinted off sharp teeth. My eyes roved over his muscular frame, menacing claws and bulky armour. Confidence and fury raged, and I reached further out. Somehow, the Force didn't register on the guard. _What? Why can't I sense his life essence? _A latent anger stirred within, blazing heat through my body. _What's really going on here?_

I took a step towards the shadowy guard. _Never mind. I'll find out. _My fury encompassed an icy core._ And if it **is** a trap, then... then we'll just see who walks away alive._

…

_I walked further, well aware a trap was waiting for me, but my pride would not allow for anything but to show I was the strongest. _No one can best me. No one ever has, and once again, it looks like I have to prove it.

_A large chrome door opened. _Of course, they are expecting me. _I had been lured onto this pathetic hovel of a planet merely to be led into an ambush, organized by Deralian troops and some of my own traitorous Dark Jedi. _I will lay waste to this festering planet.

But first, the matter of this scum up ahead. I will show them what happens to those who dare to betray me!

…

I squeezed my eyes shut, and opened them again. _Concentrate, dammit! I am stronger than this! _The comforting presence of my lightsabers hung at my belt, concealed by the loose clothing I'd worn since I'd left the Ebon Hawk. Funny, I wasn't cold anymore.

I strode forward towards the back door, and the alien stepped aside.

"Name?" he all but spat.

"Alieya." I smiled tightly, offering the false one the Genoharadan had given me. He snorted, and opened the door.

"Come with me," he grunted, motioning me inwards.

"No, after you," I offered in a pleasant voice, baring my teeth. He rolled his eyes, an exasperated expression lacing his dark face. Nonetheless, he stepped through the door first.

Questions buzzed insistently through my mind as I took the first step into danger. The door swung ominously shut behind me, but the warehouse itself was well lit, despite a lack of windows. Numerous bright, fluorescent lights hung low from the ceiling, creating a sheen of dazzling brilliance that all but blinded my eyes. Various storage crates lined the walls; probably brimming with alcoholic supplies for the cantina. A small desk graced the far end of the building, behind which a waiting human sat.

I paused, stretching out my Force senses as I did so. A straight path to the waiting human would take me directly between two small stacks of crates, oddly separated from the larger storage boxes that lined the shadowy walls. The alien guard walked nonchalantly between the crates, but something about their position raised my mistrust.

Pinpricks of life flared through the Force, alerting me to about twenty waiting sentients hidden behind the larger crates. _Sithspit, it **is** an ambush! _The guard had already passed the middle of the building, nearing the desk at the far wall.

_Who am I that a group as powerful as the Genoharadan would go to all this trouble of killing me? _I barely had the self-control to restrain a feral snarl from erupting. _The best way to foil an ambush is to trip it and charge. _

The Force begged to be used; my anger begged to be unleashed. The snarl erupted unconsciously from my lungs, and my lightsabers jerked into my hands, the red haze of activation mirroring my burning fury. A primal rage pushed aside any rational thought, and basic instinct took over. I wasn't even surprised to feel myself moving, running, sprinting, through the centre of the warehouse, my surroundings elongating in the manner that always accompanied Force induced speed. _When you act, strike once and strike hard as if it were your last. Therein lies victory. _A dark muttering from Evil Bitch, growing in power.

A large boom sounded behind me; the centre crates exploding as I sped past. Had it not been for my increased celerity that probably would have been my end. _They thought to kill me with a bunch of pathetic mines, _a rabid voice growled in my head. _They will all die for this!_

The heat wave of the blast hit, shunting me closer to the guard who had turned around to look back at me in shock. The comical expression of stunned surprise didn't leave his face even as my outstretched lightsaber seared through his neck. _One moron down, many to follow._

The seated human jerked to his feet and bellowed something, as I leaped over the desk and drove my off-hand saber through his throat. The sheer feeling of supremacy, the immense power swamping me, overloaded my senses. I was vaguely aware of a primitive howl of victory exiting my lungs as I whirled around, utilizing the Force to leap onto the now-bloodied desk. _Peace, this can't be happening, _a soft whisper, drowned out by raging, swirling emotions of hatred and fury. _Peace is a lie! There is only passion!_

The dim lights of the warehouse cut out, engulfing the storage warehouse into a pure blackness only broken by the eerie reddish glow of my 'sabers. A cold, calculating part of me – the only portion still marginally sane – realized the rest of the Genoharadan would no doubt be wearing visors. My brilliant weapons were merely showing them the bulls-eye.

…

_I stood still in the doorway, aware that the light from the room behind was illuminating my presence like a homing beacon, but perversely I wanted them to make the first, futile move._

_I could sense perhaps ten or so Dark Jedi in the room. The blood of Deralian troops still splattered my robes; yet I was more than ready to add to it. _Who organized this? Which pathetic minion dared to believe they could challenge me?

_The one nearest snarled, and charged. _

_My lightsabers hissed - twin bands of blood-red. I threw one uncaringly at the oncoming traitor, following it with sparks of brilliant blue static from my fingertips._

_The man screeched, stumbling backwards and clutching at his shoulder; now missing one arm. I deftly halted my spree of lightening to catch my off-hand 'saber._

"_Cowards!" My snarl ended in a dark, bitter laugh. "You weak fools! All too pathetic to challenge me one on one!"_

"_Let's just see if you're strong enough to survive us all, my lord!" another figure yelled, his last words mocking as he jumped forwards to challenge me._

Arran. Always brash and fiery, but he's too stupid to organize something like this. I will find out who put them up to this._ The others followed in his wake more cautiously, fanning out in a large circle._

_It started like a dance; an elegant movement of feints and ripostes and blood and lightening and laughter and slaughter... I lost track of everything as the Force bent itself to my will, as my lightsabers cleaved a path through flesh, and my body dodged and weaved around my enemies. My side burned and my leg cried in agony where a 'saber had carved out a chunk of flesh, but pain was a useful tool. _Pain and anger. Tools to unleash passion. And through passion, I gain strength!

…

Shots fired – pinpricks of light I dodged and reflected atop the slippery desk. Memories blurred into reality, and I wasn't entirely sure who I was fighting anymore. Something slammed into my shoulder, with such force that I fell backwards, landing with a grunt onto the darkened floor. Agony resonated down my arm to the weakened bone still mending, and my teeth bared in the darkness. _Pain can be used, _Evil Bitch growled gleefully. I succumbed further; the Force welled up like a bursting water pipe about to explode. _Used to release passion. Passion that can build strength, and increase power._

Something exploded inside of me; a thousand shards of broken crystal pierced through my skin from the inside out, stabbing through in an oddly satisfying way. I screamed; whether in surprise or rage or glee I no longer knew. My senses peaked as sharply as a glitterstim high, and a darkly visible aura pulsed and radiated around me. _The true berserker state, at last! _Evil Bitch was crowing.

Numerous grenades were lobbed towards me; the Force hurled them back towards their owners as I leapt clear of the desk. Bright flashes of fragmentation danced against crates, and the blissful tones of agonized screaming filled my ears. _This is true living! True power!_

…

"_Your time has come! Your power is draining, I can feel it!" Arran snarled. He had only two allies left, but all three raised their lightsabers threateningly._

"_Surely you don't think you've seen the limits of my power, little Sith pretender?" I mocked. "Let me show you just how mistaken you are. My power is my victory. You will beg for release at the end."_

_I pulled on the Force, jerking Arran's feet out from underneath him. _

"_Tut tut," I mocked, leaping backwards to avoid the charge of the others. "You really should guard yourself better." _That trick always works. Except against my loving apprentice. Damn his Force immunity. _But he couldn't have anything to do with this. No. No matter what had happened in the past, he wouldn't dare._

_I unleashed a powerful Force-compressed blast of air that slammed into all of them as Arran struggled to his feet gingerly. It knocked Arran and one of his lackeys back down, but the other, a human female, grunted with effort as she blocked it. I took the opportunity to jump towards Arran's fallen comrade, and sheathe my lightsaber home into his chest._

"_There goes another one of your friends," I taunted mildly, turning to face the female. Fear and uncertainty rolled off her in tantalizingly sweet waves I could almost smell. I reached out and massaged that fear, encouraging it to take over. _She may have strength, but she lacks conviction in her own abilities. _The woman took a hesitant step backwards, and my smile grew as I squeezed my fist tight. She choked, dropping her weapon to clutch at her throat._

"_No!" Arran shrieked, charging me like a rancor in heat. I laughed as I sent him flying with another Force wave. My hand clenched again, and the Dark Jedi gagged._

"_Neiza!" Arran yelled, his voice twisting in emotion._

"_Oh dear," I said softly as the woman suffocated. "Don't tell me you actually care for the girl, Arran?" She had risen into the air, legs twitching spasmodically as her hands scrabbled at her throat. "Lucky for you I am feeling generous. Beg on your knees for forgiveness, and I may yet let her live."_

"_Never!" Arran snarled, lurching to his feet._

"_A shame. I guess you didn't really care for her then." _

…

The Genoharadan were, however, professionals. A number of them fired modified slugthrowers at me; impossible to see in the darkness... unless one could utilize the Force. My lips curved as I dodged the old-fashioned projectiles; some missing me entirely while others melted on my blades.

Four assassins leapt towards me with vibroblades; their movements appearing slow and clumsy to my heightened senses. Others were still firing; I lured the blade-wielders in between me and the cross-fire. The Force hummed through my flesh; the power of life of which I was master. I twisted it to do my bidding, piercing deep into nearby minds with a blast of intangible terror. All but one of the assassins dropped to their feet, clutching at their heads and screaming. The remaining one, an Aqualish, stepped forward with his blade raised. I admired his ability to resist the fear; this one had courage. I let the Force wrap around him, coil tightly over his limbs as I searched for a weak spot. Electrical impulses caught my attention; they emanated from his eye sockets. _Curious. Occular implants? _Well, that was easy enough to focus on. I tightened my focus, narrowing it on his eyes and finding my target. With a satisfied smirk, I yanked mentally.

The Aqualish screeched so loudly that even the drunken louts back in the cantina must have heard. His eyes landed with a wet plop behind me.

An explosion rocked the ceiling, the noise a slow growling boom in my ears. I looked up to see a blast of light shattering through the cheap plastifoam roof, followed by fragments of insulation floating like fragile snowflakes dusting the warehouse with winter's kiss. A droid dropped down from the heavens, firing a blaster rapidly on his descent.

"Observation: I see you have started the fun without me, master," HK commented as he landed with a thud, in a tone that somehow managed to convey disappointment.

Victory was near; I could almost taste it, despite the fact I was still outnumbered. HK started firing rapidly, his shots accurate and his movements nimble despite his mechanical build. One of the assassins turned to run, but did not make it to the door. _Victory is mine. Through victory, my chains are broken._

Someone threw a gas grenade; the Genoharadan were getting desperate if they believed that would work on a droid and a Force user. The grenade was swept to the far corner; I leapt away from any residue gas. Dark laughter bubbled up, and streaks of lightening danced on my enemies, bathing the assassins in eerie blue. The Force-induced rage was still with me, still firing strongly through my veins, but... the return of a dull ache in my forearm warned me my strength was waning.

A flicker in the Force behind me. I jerked to the side just as one of the last Genoharadan futilely stabbed the air I had recently occupied. Dim light from the jagged hole in the roof illuminated the assassin, and I realized he was the same unfamiliar race as the guard I'd gutted earlier. I slammed the Force into him, but somehow it twisted – split – divided around the alien, refusing to touch him physically. Some of my shock must have shown, for a confident smirk pleated his face. He made a guttural sound; half-laugh, half-snort.

_Dashade. _Recognition slammed through me; the force-resistant species thought to be extinct. _How the frell had the Genoharadan acquired two of the bastards? _

"You won't find me so easy, Jedi!" the alien spat.

"I'm no Jedi!" I snarled, drawing deeper into my faltering berserker state. The Force was sputtering from my grasp, slithering away. "And while the Force may not touch you, Dashade, it can certainly aid me!" I finished on a howl, and charged.

Speed was on my side, and his attack just wasn't quick enough. His Echani blade whistled through the air, missing my neck as I dodged; sliding onto my knees and slicing through the tendons in his leg with a 'saber. I rolled away as the Dashade howled, hopping onto his other foot instinctively to lurch at me again. One 'saber rose to parry, while the other stabbed deep through his foot, into the permacrete floor. The smell of burning, cauterized flesh tickled my senses.

A scream of pure agony ripped from the Dashade as he stumbled, off-balance, his foot slicing cleaning through the 'saber as he did so. His blade clattered uselessly, a small distance away from his hand.

I stood up, acting quickly as the Force threatened to desert me. _My strength is fading. _My lightsabers both poised at the alien's neck, I bared my teeth.

"Why?" I yelled. "Why did the Genoharadan double-cross me?"

"Why do you think?" the Dashade grunted, closing his eyes in pain.

_The Genoharadan fight for money. Someone put a contract on my head. _"Who, then?" My voice had grown softer. "Tell me who, before I start randomly slicing your limbs off."

"We have our own honour code, Jedi scum!" the Dashade spat. "Some information cannot be bought!"

"Everything can be bought." I said coldly, dragging a 'saber down towards his groin. "Everyone has a price, my friend. And you are just about finished."

…

"_You are finished, Arran," I said softly, unleashing another round of lightening into his body. His tortured screams wafted through the stagnant air. "But you know how long I can make you suffer. Months... years even. Tell me who commandeered this, and your end will be quick."_

_He had lost his lightsaber, an arm, half a leg and his dignity. But he was not broken, yet. "I gave the orders! This was **my** mission!" he spat in between choking gasps of pain._

_I laughed mockingly, firing another round of lightening through his living corpse. "Do not insult me! Who was it? Bandon? Yudan? Malak himself?!" Another round of static played his body. "Tell me the truth, or do I have to tear it from you mind?" I snarled._

_His gasps of pain were broken and unsteady; the Force had long since left him. Or so I thought, and was completely unprepared for his next move._

_A sudden, brief jerk on the Force, focused entirely on a small, ceremonial dagger strapped around my thigh. It flew into the air and embedded in his heart before I could act._

"_You will never know," he_ g_asped. I flooded the Force through him instinctively, furiously trying to knit together muscle and flesh. I could not heal properly, but damage control was something I had grown adept at. His life ebbed away, despite my efforts. "You will always doubt your followers, my Lord Revan," he choked, his head turning and I felt his spirit depart._

…

I froze; everything turned to ice, and the Force slipped away, out of my grasp. Agony returned in a flood; muscles complained and burned but nothing could override the growing sense of terror within my own head.

I stumbled backwards, vaguely aware my mouth had dropped open in horror. The Dashade took one look at me, and lurched towards his Echani duelling blade lying nearby.

_What did Arran say?_

My limbs failed me, my thoughts reeled in denial.

_Who is Evil Bitch?_

The Dashade grasped his weapon, and pulled it back to throw at me.

_-my Lord-_

No words could be more damning.

HK materialized behind the Dashade, firing point-blank into his head. The blade clanged to the ground, dropping from lifeless fingers. Just another corpse.

"Statement: All meatbags have now been terminated, master." A smug, metallic voice.

I was lying down. I wasn't sure how I'd made the transition from standing to lying, but I couldn't move anymore. Couldn't think. Couldn't breathe.

xXx

Time passed. Seconds or hours; I wasn't sure and I didn't care. Time lost all meaning when compared to the horrifying revelation rebounding mercilessly within my own head. A logical voice was stating that it was time to move; time to get out before anyone discovered the piles of Genoharadan corpses that lay within touching distance, surrounding me like a field of red daisies. The sharp tang of bloodied, mortal injuries assailed my senses, and it would not be long before I was discovered.

But that thought paled in comparison with the knowledge of who Evil Bitch truly was. _No wonder she kept wresting control. It all makes nightmarish sense. _Funny how much importance can be trapped into a name. Jen Sahara, on one hand, meant nothing. A common enough Deralian name, to suit a common enough scholar. _But now I know another name. Two out of three. _

Bubbles of hysteria trapped in my throat, sticking like cheap fizz-pop. Part of me had almost become resigned to a lack of knowledge about my past. To never knowing who I really was. _Not Jen Sahara. I knew that from the start. _Evil Bitch or Street Kid? I thought I'd worked that one out those first days on Taris, but everything since then had become ...murky.

_So what does that make me? _Two out of three. Neither name could possibly be correct; one anonymous and sickeningly passive; the other a hideous, macabre monster from a horror vid. Terrifying and utterly unbelievable.

A chill swept through me again.

I couldn't feel. My entire body was disjointed, like I had somehow separated myself from the physical flesh. One thought alone kept repeating in my head, like the monotonous chant of monks praying to their un-noticing god. No rational analysis was possible, not with the numb, detached question spinning around and around, demanding an answer that I did not know. But still, I kept asking myself.

Why do I have the Dark Lord of the Sith in my head?

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_**Firera** - Thanks, glad you enjoyed Karon's POV. Heh, you mention my quick update speed and then I take ages... :)  
**snackfiend101** - Glad you liked Karon. Well, you don't get to see the rest of the crew yet. This one is all Jen/SK/EB.  
**Brynn** - Glad to see you're still reading:)  
**Data** - Hope you like what comes next.  
**Red Mage Neko** - Heh. Very good or very very bad? Well, it ain't really the former...  
**Dark Lord Daishi** - here comes the Genoharadan :)  
**Kosiah** - thanks lots and lots! Dunno how I managed without you :)  
**Prisoner24601** - Thanks - glad to hear the descriptions getting better ::grin:: There's another pre-game flash in this chapter, and bound to be more in future. Yeah, I wouldn't be in Bastila's position for all the credits in the world, myself :P  
**Mister Gordo** - Here you go :)  
**Xan** - Cheers, was trying to temper her a bit :)_


	37. Into the deep

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

**_Author's Note: Many thanks to Kosiah for the beta._**

* * *

**Chapter 37 - Into the deep **

_- Juhani -_

* * *

Master Karon smiled warmly at me, and patted my shoulder. I managed a weak shadow of a smile in response. I felt somewhat drained in spirit after the last few hours. Talking and meditating with Karon had brought a glimmer of peace to my soul, but I could not look at her without thinking of another. There had been only two Zabrak Masters in the Jedi Order - and although I had met Karon only once prior, she reminded me sharply of a past I desired to forget. 

_She looks so similar to Quatra. _Perhaps I was not good at distinguishing differing features of the Zabrak race, but other than Master Karon's startling eyes, they could have been sisters. _They even talk the same. _Both spoke with a soft intensity, as if every word had a deep meaning beyond the obvious. Both had a quiet charisma, that made others stop and listen. _But there **are** differences. In all the years I spent with Quatra, I never heard her laugh._

Karon's chuckle was a bright chime, and at times I could see a sort of wry self-deprecation in her eyes. _And flashes of pain whenever we speak of Revan._

Karon seemed to be a gentle sort of person, and I found myself wondering how I would have fared under her tutelage. The last few hours of meditation had forced me to analyze my own character in ways that left me feeling uncomfortable with myself. _I latched on to Quatra so intensely because I had no one left, and my childhood had taught me that love was meant to difficult, perhaps even unreachable. _Quatra had always been slightly stand-offish and sparing with her praise, which made me desire it all the more.

Bastila had, of course, told me of Quatra's survival some days ago, but with the revelation of Jen's true identity – amongst other things – I'd managed to push away the knowledge to a dark, quiet corner of my troubled mind. The fact that she still lived made a bitter mockery of the years I'd spent, in rage and despair and grief. A tiny, twisted part of me wished that Quatra actually was dead. _How can I think that? She was my master! I loved her! _And yet, she had betrayed me most cruelly.

Only now was Quatra's image tarnished in my mind, although I recalled a time when someone else was none too impressed with my former master...

…

_The dry, dusty fragrance of long grass tickled my senses, as the blades tickled my face. Dantooine's clear night sky stretched infinitely above me, and as I lay quietly on the solitary plains, I wondered how similar the panorama above me was to my homeworld's skies. I could no longer recall it: frantic, bitter memories of Tarisian streets and Tarisian nightmares had long since eroded any recollection of my early years. _But I am fortunate, now. The Jedi have taken me in, and I can finally achieve my dream – if only I work harder.

_Quatra's latest lecture still rang in my ears and I was intently determined to win her approval. I would make her smile at me; I would make her proud. My other dreams of her were foolish whisperings that I ruthlessly pushed away and refused to indulge, except when the longing became too strong._

"_She is too hard on you," a voice spoke next to me, cracking through the night's serenity._

_The corners of my mouth turned down. Belaya was my closest – and perhaps only – friend on Dantooine, but she did not understand Quatra. "She is a master Belaya, she knows what she is doing. And I will be a better Jedi for it."_

"_Juhani, are you blind? She spends all day lecturing you, assigns you to trials and exercises that daunt most Knights, and then forces you to meditate upon your failures for days on end! No other master is so harsh!"_

"_You cannot seriously question a master – we are only padawans! We know nothing of the Order." I struggled to stay calm – I did not wish to offend my friend, but how could she understand a master's methods? Particularly when Tefain – her master - was such an affable, gentle character in comparison._

"_That's- that's – that's kath dung!" she burst out._

_I blinked in the darkness. I had never heard Belaya curse; her speech was consistently formal – almost to a fault._

_Belaya sighed. "Juhani, your admiration for her is too intense, and Quatra is determined to quash that feeling with everything she puts you through! But no matter how arduous the trial, you just admire her all the more!"_

"_Too intense?" the words ripped angrily from my lungs, and I jumped to my feet. "You know nothing, Belaya!" I spat. "Quatra is my master, of course I care for her! Do not – ever – imply such a thing again!"_

_Somehow Belaya had risen as well, and she reached out an imploring hand. I jerked away, furious, and she sighed heavily. "I am sorry. I did not mean to offend. I just- I care for you too, Juhani, and I- I am worried."_

_I turned my back, and faced the nearby Enclave. "Do not concern yourself on my behalf, Belaya. I have the utmost faith in Master Quatra, and she knows what she is doing," I said coldly as I started striding away._

_Belaya's next words were soft and not meant for my ears, but the gentle Dantooine breeze taunted me with them. "I hope she does, Juhani. I hope she does."_

…

"Are you ready, Juhani?" Karon's soft words cut through my reverie. I blinked, and nodded solemnly at her as she opened the door of the small meeting room we had occupied for the last four hours. Karon had declared it was time for a break from soul-searching, time to see Bastila and discuss our immediate plans. Both of us had been in a Force trance and sensed the young Jedi slowly come to consciousness.

_But it's the other presences we felt that worry me. _Karon dismissed my fears openly, but the way her mouth tightened belied her casual attitude. _It felt like eight, or maybe ten, dark souls. _In a place as populated as Ahto City, the seething mass of life made it difficult to pick out any single mind in particular. But when a group of Force users – _dark_ Force users – were assembled together, one would have to be Force-blind not to sense them.

Too many things were pressing down on me. Not the least was Revan's flight. My first feeling upon realizing that had been despair. She had once begged me to teach her – a request that had ballooned in importance with Calo Nord's startling revelation. Part of me was convinced that only by saving Revan from the darkness could I prove myself worthy of once more wearing the mantle of the Jedi. Somehow, deep down, I felt like my redemption had escaped along with her. _No. Master Karon has faith in me; as does Bastila. _If only I shared it.

_And then there's the mission Karon wants us to accomplish. _A secret Republic base on the bottom of the Manaan Ocean – conveniently near where the Council believed the Star Map to be located – had abruptly cut contact with the Republic and Selkath authorities alike. What was more worrying was that no rescue team had yet returned – and two had already been sent.

The thought of descending into those watery depths turned my stomach, but I could not let Master Karon or Bastila see that. I had enough to prove – I had to live up to the honour of being a Jedi once more – without falling victim to my own weaknesses. _But all that water... _Oceans, in general, made most Cathar uneasy, but the phobia had always been more potent for me. _Or perhaps it is because I am weak. Can I really expect to be strong enough to become a Jedi once more? After the last two years?_

I swallowed, and firmly pushed those doubts aside. I had to prove myself! If I could not do it by guiding Revan to the light, then I would by helping Bastila. Too long had I shirked my responsibilities, too long had I taken the easy way out.

"_I don't think you fell to the dark side as much as used it as an excuse for your own failure."_

Revan's words, taunting and yet far too perceptive from one as tormented as she. It was mere minutes after our duel on Tatooine, and already she had cut to the core of my weakness.

…

"_I failed them!" I burst out, despair coursing through me. The anger had gone, swallowed up by the endless pit of misery this strange human was evoking. Why was she tormenting me so? Why had she not killed me yet? "I failed them all! What else could I do?"_

_The clay walls of Anchorhead were nearing, mulling with sentient life I did not wish to face. Yet I could not go back to my violent, meaningless existence... not anymore._

"_Learn from your mistakes?" she snapped sarcastically, green eyes flashing. Despite the mocking nature of her tone, there was a grain of wisdom there I could not shy away from._

…

"Juhani?" Karon queried again, frowning as she waited by the door. I gave myself a little shake, and followed her meekly down the corridor.

I felt bare, like my soul was ripped open for all to see. Merely compounding this was the empty space on my belt where my lightsaber previously hung. Karon had politely asked to hold onto mine for the time being, assuring me she would return it soon. While I trusted the Zabrak master and was not particularly attached to the Sith lightsaber, I still felt oddly uncomfortable without it at the ready.

We reached Bastila's quarters just as she stepped out, pale and shaking. Karon immediately went to her, resting hands upon the young Jedi's shoulders.

"Bastila? What is it? The bond?"

"I-" Bastila stammered, before quickly regaining her composure. Her face, while still lacking in colour, firmed into a brief smile of greeting. For all that she had been put in many trying situations, Bastila was still able to quickly summon a composure I envied. "I had a rather disturbing dream."

"Yes?" Karon asked pointedly.

"I-I cannot really recall it, Master Karon," Bastila said haltedly. "It was – strange. All I could feel was anger. Anger and death."

"Jen?" Karon's voice was low.

"Yes," Bastila admitted reluctantly. "I do not know what has happened, but it is almost as if I cannot sense her anymore. I know she is there but-" She sighed. "My sense of her is numb. Like the stories of an amputee's ghost limb. She broke through my shields earlier. Perhaps she has found a way of distancing herself from me."

Karon pursed her lips. "And she is not answering you?"

"I do not believe she can hear me, Karon," Bastila responded, an apprehensive frown edging into her controlled countenance.

A tired look invaded the Zabrak's bright eyes. "We must have faith in the Force." It almost sounded as if Karon was talking to herself. "Leave it to me, Bastila. She is my responsibility." Karon's voice dropped on the last word.

The young Jedi nodded, and turned to look me over. Sympathy warmed her face, an emotion I did not particularly want nor deserve. "How are you, Juhani?" Her voice was kind, and I shrugged my discomfort off.

"I am good," I said softly. Bastila's eyes pinned me with the lie, and I sighed. "Well, I am better than I was."

She smiled, and I was surprised by the sadness of it. "I am glad to hear that." She looked over at Karon again, and straightened her shoulders. "I am ready to investigate the base now."

"Now?" Karon's voice was sharp with concern. "Bastila, for all that I said this mission was important, I do really think that-"

"There you are!" an annoyed, smarmy voice broke through our conversation, and I looked up to see Roland Wann stride down the corridor. He was scowling in frustration, his attention focused on the Zabrak master. The Republic commander had already impressed upon me his dislike of having Jedi stationed in the Embassy, even though it was he who had requested Karon's aid. The only person who seemed to irritate Roland more than one of us was the Mandalorian.

"Commander Wann," Karon acknowledged, tipping her head in deference. She did not have to be so polite; although Roland Wann was a Fleet officer, the Embassy itself was technically controlled by the Senate, which meant that Karon had as much authority as the human himself.

Roland's scowl deepened in response. He was middle-aged, for a human, with dark skin and thinning hair. His face was scarred in a few places, indicating that once upon a time, he had seen action of some sort. However his uniform fit him tightly, straining somewhat against his girth. Posted on the relatively peaceful planet of Manaan, I doubted Roland Wann was as fit as he had once been.

"Karon," he said flatly, omitting the customary title. I saw Bastila stiffen at his rudeness. "I thought you would have been on your way to Hrakert Station by now. You did promise aid." His voice edged on accusatory.

"We have just been discussing it, _Commander_ Wann." Bastila interrupted, stressing his rank pointedly. Karon shot Bastila a small frown. I decided to stay quiet.

Roland Wann glanced at Bastila in annoyance, and then looked back to the Zabrak.

"Well?" he demanded.

Karon sighed audibly. "As Padawan Shan said," she began, and I wondered if she was silently reminding Bastila of her own station, "we are talking about it right now."

"What's to talk about? I need a rescue team down there! I have men trapped in the station, men I haven't heard from for days! And we haven't had a shipment for over a week!" Roland's face was flushed with anger.

_Shipment? I wonder if he's more concerned over lost credits than men. _I berated myself; I could not know Roland's motivation, and that sort of uncharitable thought was beneath me.

"Commander Wann," Karon said tightly, in a clipped voice. "Jedi's Bastila and Juhani will be travelling down there today. I will honour my word."

The Republic officer looked affronted and almost incredulous as he once more eyed Bastila, and then turned to appraise me dismissively. The corners of his mouth turned down further. "I thought _you_ were heading down, Karon." He calmed his voice down, apparently trying to wrest back control of his temper.

"I promised aid; I did not say I would go myself. I have other responsibilities, Commander," Karon said tightly. Her face was a cold mask, and I was reminded sharply of Quatra at that very moment. _Icy disapproval. _I shivered.

"This mission seems to call for a Jedi master, not a bunch of apprentices!" he lashed back. Considering Bastila's reputation as a warhero, I did not understand why Roland was so angry. _Perhaps he is looking for any reason to tear a strip off Karon._

Bastila interrupted once more, scowling. "I will do my duty," she said in a low voice. I looked at her in surprise. _Perhaps I am not the only one with something to prove._

"Commander, could you inform us of Captain Onasi's whereabouts?" Karon enquired, cutting in before Roland could continue his tirade. "I believe his help would also be invaluable."

"Captain Onasi is otherwise occupied with Republic business," Roland shot back silkily, his voice almost... sanctimonious. Karon's bright eyes bored into his, and the human stiffened in righteous determination. Bastila looked ready to join in the battle of wills once more.

"Having fun?" a mocking voice drawled. The four of us started, turning to see the bulky form of Canderous Ordo saunter down the hallway like he owned it. I struggled to stop a frown pleating my forehead. The way the man walked - like a predator casually loping through his territory - set my hackles rising. And yet, I could not help a grudging respect for him, ever since our stand-off against Calo Nord. We fought well together; I could not deny that the ruthless Mandalorian was a talented warrior.

"Canderous. You wanted something?" Bastila interjected, turning to face him squarely. A smirk played on his face as he lazily appraised us all. I did not doubt he could feel the tension swirling between the four of us.

"Simply to say farewell, princess," he said at last, his gaze coming to a rest on the young Jedi. "It's been... interesting."

"You're leaving?" Bastila echoed sharply.

"Why, yes," he drawled. "The party's breaking up, or haven't you noticed? First Jen and psycho-droid make an explosive getaway, and then the Twi'lek brat and her overgrown carpet sod off. No doubt you'll find those two in some seedy bar, lifting a few pockets. Figure I might as well head out now, find some work... actually get paid for risking my life," he added pointedly.

"You are looking for mercenary work, Canderous Ordo?" Karon cut in smoothly.

"Well," he replied in a sarcastic voice, "it's generally what mercenaries do."

Bastila's eyes flashed at his tone, and Roland Wann looked ready to throw him out. Karon, however, let out a tinkle of amused laughter. "In that case, I have a proposition for you."

Canderous' grey eyes sharpened on the Zabrak. "Not interested, Jedi. Not unless you pay me upfront."

Karon inclined her head. "That can be arranged."

"Karon, we can handle the situation," Bastila protested.

The Zabrak's expression softened as she looked at Bastila. "Yes you can, Bastila. However, I would prefer you had additional help. We do not know exactly what happened at Hrakert Station, and seeing as Captain Onasi is otherwise indisposed-" she threw a rueful look at Roland Wann, who scowled in return, "-then I will take help where I find it. Trust in the Force, Bastila."

"I don't like the idea of a Mandalorian mercenary interfering in Republic business," Roland cut in, crossing his arms in belligerence.

"I'm sure you don't," Canderous drawled, his voice mocking. Roland Wann drew himself up to retort, but once more Karon intervened. I wondered at her seemingly endless patience. Canderous, in his own way, was as hard to deal with as Roland.

"Roland, your last rescue teams was comprised entirely of mercenaries, so you should have no problem with Canderous accompanying the others. I will pay his fee, so it will cost you nothing," Karon interjected smoothly. "Canderous, if you would come with me, we can discuss the more material aspects of this mission. Juhani, Bastila, freshen up and meet us in the communications room. Commander Wann, I would be obliged if you could meet us there also."

Roland looked like he was being forced to swallow something extremely unpleasant. Canderous rolled his eyes, but willingly followed Karon down the corridor. _I guess he's prepared to do anything for money._

I glanced at Bastila; she shot me a look of pure annoyance about the circumstances. I was merely glad I had stayed out of the bickering, but I wondered how well I would be taking things in an hour or so. _Trapped with Bastila and Canderous sniping at each other, and surrounded by all that water..._

xXx

"I do not know who is worse," Bastila muttered, exiting the refresher. I had been sitting on the small meditation mat, waiting for her to finish. "Roland Wann with his snide comments and dislike of Jedi, or Canderous' bloodthirsty nature and superiority complex. Honestly, what was Karon thinking? We do not need his help, and he is hardly trustworthy."

"An extra pair of hands cannot hurt," I said softly, glancing around her quarters once more. I was unused to such luxury, and I wondered if Bastila was also. Although the enclave on Dantooine was far superior to any habitat I'd lived in prior, it was still sparse and small. The decadence of the Republic rooms made me itch. "Perhaps Karon believes there is a reason Canderous appeared when he did."

Bastila threw me a sharp look, and then sighed. "You are correct, Juhani. Certainly, this continued quarrelling serves no one. I should have more patience."

She smiled at me, patting me companionably on the arm. I wondered when Bastila had started to treat me like a friend. She was still concerned for me – I could see by the way she sometimes watched me worriedly when she thought I wasn't paying attention – but overall, she treated me like an equal. Like a fellow Jedi. Despite my own insecurities and worries, it felt nice.

"Let us find the others then," Bastila said on a cheery note that somehow rang false. I followed her silently through the glistening corridors of the Embassy, lost within my own thoughts. I would prove myself with this mission - I had to. It felt as if my whole future was riding on it. _No. I believed the same about Revan. I thought that only by teaching her would I be able to redeem myself, and she has taken that choice out of my hands. I must confront my future one step at a time. _Nothing was ever easy.

Karon smiled as we entered the main communications room. A number of Republic technicians were busy working at terminals along the far wall, but the main console was abandoned except for Wann's presence. He gave us both a minuscule nod, saving his glare for Canderous who was slouching against a chrome wall behind Karon.

"Are you both sure you wish to start now?" Karon enquired. "You have time for a few more hours of rest."

Roland began to interrupt hotly, but subsided when Bastila waved a placating hand. "I am ready, Master Karon."

"As am I," I echoed softly, striving to sound confident.

"Let's just get on with it," Canderous muttered.

"I take it you have been paid, Canderous?" Bastila said icily.

"Even a mercenary has to eat, princess," he grated in response, folding his arms.

"Commander Wann," Karon cut in. "If you would be so kind as to brief us on the mission?"

I thought I heard the older man sigh. "As you know, the Republic is fighting for its very existence against the evil of the Sith Empire," Roland Wann began. Although I sympathized with the struggle, I could not help but feel the man sounded pompous. He flicked a suspicious glance at Canderous. "Hrakert Station is but one of our research bases across the galaxy. It is, however, of great importance."

"What sort of 'research'?" Canderous interrupted, dragging a cigarra to his lips.

"I'll thank you not to smoke in here," Roland said stiffly.

Canderous looked ready to object until Karon stared at him pointedly. He rolled his eyes, but pocketed the cigarra anyway.

Roland sniffed, and continued talking. "It's a biological research station. That's all you need to know."

"It's got something to do with this kolto you Republic love, isn't it?" Canderous interrupted once more. "It's gotta be the only thing here to get you so panicky."

A bland expression crossed Karon's face, and a muscle twitched under Roland's eye as he opened his mouth to rant. "That would be a violation of the Selkath non-interference agreement, Mandalorian! It is merely a research base – we are worried because we care for all the workers of the Republic! Unlike you bloodthirsty barbarians, happy enough to slaughter any innocent-"

"Calm!" Karon's voice resonated through the room, causing even the unflappable Mandalorian to blink. The silence the followed her command was filled with a peaceful, relaxing sensation, and I marvelled at Karon's ability to manipulate the Force so subtly. Both Roland and Canderous seemed to relax somewhat, their postures loosening.

"Now, Roland, perhaps you can tell us about the rescue parties you have already sent?" Karon's voice was deceptively mild.

Roland coughed. "As you know, we lost contact with the base six days ago. We were nearing completion of the southern section when the digging teams reported some sort of obstruction... could be that artefact you mentioned earlier, Karon. After that, transmissions from the base were cut off abruptly. We sent a rescue party almost immediately, but they did not report back. Our second team contacted us only once."

Roland leaned over the console, tapping a few keys briefly. A few seconds later, and the static crackle of a voice filled the room.

"_Republic HQ, this is Scarlett Five. We've just docked at Hrakert Station. The firaxan sharks were crazy on the way down! I'm glad for the sonics, otherwise we'd be a bloody mess on the bottom of the ocean. In fact, I'm surprised we aren't anyway." _There was a slight pause in the message. _"Commander, this place is a mess. There's no power to most of the base. I could see the southern side of the station was destroyed as we came in. There's a pile of corpses here, too... Selkath, Human, and what looks like the last rescue party. Dammit, I'm starting to get the feeling you ain't paying us enough, man. Will report once we've made some headway. Out."_

Canderous broke the ominous silence with a harsh bark of laughter. "Ain't this gonna be a barrel of laughs."

Bastila pointedly ignored his comment, turning to look at Roland. "This was the only message you received?"

Roland sighed heavily. Somehow, he looked older than before. "The only one, yes."

"How many men in the rescue teams?" Canderous asked.

"Five in the first group. The last lot was four mercenaries, I guess I didn't really expect them to make it, but I had to try something!" Roland ended in frustration.

"At this stage, we have no idea what could have caused the problem," Karon intervened.

"Perhaps the Sith?" Bastila offered.

"Gods, I hope not," Roland muttered. "I don't think so. We would have heard from them – and the Selkath conservatives – if they had discovered-" Roland coughed abruptly, his dark skin flushing. "I think it has something to do with the unusual behaviour of the firaxan sharks. Our underwater sensors were going mad with aquatic activity, and that transmission you just listened to mentioned the same thing. I'm almost inclined to believe the damned sharks attacked the base, although that seems a little far-fetched."

"I wonder if their behaviour is merely a symptom of the problem," Karon said softly. "Firaxan sharks, in general, do not attack unless provoked."

"Well, we ain't gonna find out by yakking about it all day," Canderous interrupted gruffly. "Let's get our gear, and move out."

xXx

We made our way to the submersible, following Roland Wann deeper into the Embassy. He briskly showed us the departure point, and then strode off, muttering about more important things to do. Ironic, really, considering he was the one who had insisted this was so urgent.

The small submersible bobbed gently in the water. Sleek and black, I eyed it over dubiously as I wondered how the three of us would fit in there. _We will be travelling down into the turbid depths. _A coiling hand grasped my stomach. _I will not let this get to me. I will be strong._

"Juhani?" Bastila enquired; I turned to see a concerned look on her pale face. She stood close to me, lowering her voice so the others could not hear. "Are you well? Perhaps you do not need to go with us; you could possibly help Karon up here."

_She doesn't think I am up to it. _A sense of shame shot through me."I will be fine, Bastila," I said softly. "I will prove myself to you."

She blinked in surprise. "You do not need to prove yourself, Juhani! You have already done enough. That dark side calls to us all; you are not alone. I think you should stay."

Astonishment dawned into understanding. _She believes it is the dark side that is troubling me. _That was probably a good thing, I did not want anyone to know of my weakness. The sound of water lapping against the submersible grated in my ears.

I forced a smile. "Bastila, I will be fine. We all have our own challenges to face."

Bastila hesitated. "I- yes, you are correct. I confess that I am also troubled. As much as I disliked my bond with Jen, I do not know how to react now that I can no longer sense her. I- I wish I had some inkling of what she is doing- or her state of mind-" Bastila smiled at me weakly. "But now I am rambling. Master Karon told me that Jen is now her concern, not mine."

I smiled back at her, thoughtful. I had always thought of Bastila as strong in her Jedi serenity. Only now was I beginning to see that she had her own issues to deal with. _Revan's departure affected us all in various ways. _Carth had been unapproachable in his foul temper, and disappeared immediately after we reached the Embassy. Mission was staggered – I'd almost been able to smell the hurt radiating from her back on the Ebon Hawk. And now, both she and her Wookiee friend had gone.

As for Canderous... well, no one really knew what the Mandalorian was thinking. He had seemed grumpier then normal; but perhaps that was just Bastila's presence. I sighed.

"So this is the secret docking bay, huh? That little boat looks like it would sink with just one of us in there," Canderous' gravely voice cut through my inner musing. I turned to see him and Karon walk into the room.

"You know enough about vehicles, Canderous; I doubt you believe your own remarks," Karon responded mildly. "You will find the submersible is quite reliable and sound. It is also fitted with sonic rays that will keep the firaxans at bay."

The Mandalorian grunted as Karon turned to face us. She smiled briefly at Bastila and me, and indicated she had a gift for us both.

"Your lightsabers," the intense master said, tossing a cylindrical object to us both. I caught mine reflexively. "I hope you do not mind that I modified them somewhat."

I glanced at Karon in surprise, and activated it. The snap-hiss was music to my ears, but the bright blue colour drained the heat from my face.

Bastila was beaming, twirling a yellow double-bladed 'saber. "Thank you! I was not quite accustomed to that sickly red colour."

I had not held a blue lightsaber for years. _The traditional colour of a Guardian. _It was not canon - Jedi could choose their own colour crystals – but it seemed symbolic, somehow. A peaceful, dark blue.

"I doubt it's as modified as your original lightsaber, Bastila, but it will have to do for the meantime," Karon said dryly. "What became of yours, anyway?"

Bastila flushed uncommonly. "It was – misplaced. A lot happened on Taris."

Canderous snorted in derision. "From what I recall, princess, you told Republic Boy it rolled under your seat in the escape pod."

"Thank you kindly for the reminder, Canderous," Bastila responded in an icy voice. I could see Karon struggling to hold back a smile of amusement. "Perhaps we should get going?"

At that, I turned my lightsaber off. I could not help feeling somewhat shaken, however. _Am I a Guardian, then? Is that what Karon is telling me, by giving me this? _The Zabrak master was looking at me now, her turquoise eyes intent. She smiled, and took a step towards me.

"Have faith in yourself, Juhani," she said for my ears alone. "You will do well."

xXx

The voyage to the depths of the ocean was worse than I expected. Bastila spent the time trying to be painstakingly civil to Canderous, who merely baited her in return. I kept my eyes shut, desperately attempting to think of anything but the water enclosing me on all sides. It seemed to be pressing in on me. Even the air felt heavier, harder to breathe.

"I am glad of the sonics," Bastila remarked, leaning over to stare out the ferracrystal windows at the gloomy underworld of Manaan. She and Canderous were seated at the front of the cramped ship, while I stretched out behind. "It's keeping the firaxans at bay. What wild behaviour!"

I bit back a groan, resisting the impulse to look for myself. Even the motion of the submersible was making me ill. _I do not get spacesick, therefore I should not feel so nauseous underwater. _Common sense was hardly chasing away my unease.

"Yes, yes, aren't they pretty," Canderous grumbled in irritation.

Bastila sighed. "I thought you were insufferable before, Canderous, but ever since we landed on Manaan you have been intolerable! Can we not just _try_ to act civil, for the sake of our mission?"

"I'm being paid to keep you alive, princess, not to sweet talk you," Canderous retorted.

"Honestly, Canderous, what is troubling you? Ever since-" she paused, and then sighed irritably. "Ever since Jen left. You have been in an all-consuming grouchy mood."

"Grouchy?" His voice was low and dangerous.

My spirits ebbed further, and I glanced outside to draw my attention away from the ensuing argument. _Bad mistake. _Dark water and murky depths greeted my eyes, interspersed with faint lights illuminating a coral-strewn ocean floor. _Lights? _

"Yes, grouchy!" Bastila snapped.

"The station!" I said quickly, before the argument could escalate further. "Look, in the distance!"

"The base," Bastila breathed, moving forward to unlock the retractable steering column. The submersible jerked under her hands as she switched it into manual drive. My stomach heaved. A dizzying fear clouded my mind. _I will be strong. Think of the code! _My lips formed the first line as I struggled to maintain control. Thus far, my companions had not noticed my distress. I could only hope that things would improve once we set foot inside the station.

Bastila flicked on the transmissions as she guided the submersible ever closer to sanctuary. "Republic HQ, this is the _Shadow Cat_."

_What an inappropriate name for a submersible. Cats don't belong in the water. _Neither did Cathars.

"We are nearing Hrakert Station," Bastila continued speaking into the receiver. "The firaxans have been oddly aggressive along our approach, but our sonic emitters successfully kept them at bay. We are perhaps ten minutes from arrival. I will radio in once we have docked. This is the _Shadow Cat_, out."

Expectant silence settled over us as Bastila switched off the comm.. I stared soulfully at the base lights – it would not be long until I had steady ground under my feet. It could not be soon enough.

The lights flickered; almost as if a shadow had passed in front of the distant base. I frowned.

"What was that?" Canderous asked gruffly.

Bastila leaned forward in her chair. "I saw it too," she said slowly. "Perhaps there is a power problem at the base?"

The lights flickered again, and this time I could distinguish several shapes blocking out the sight of salvation. The murky water seemed to swirl threateningly through the ferracrystal windows.

"That's not a power failure," Canderous said. "There's something out there."

"More sharks," I mumbled, my lips turning numb. The shadows lengthened into metres, and grew eyes and teeth. Ice clenched my spine. With a churning sense of horror, I realized there were hundreds of these things in the water. And we were headed straight for them.

"A school of sharks," Bastila concluded, her voice tense but controlled. "The sonics should scare them away."

"Scare off that many?" Canderous grated. "What has your precious Republic done, fed kolto to the fish?"

I spotted the first few sharks swerve abruptly to avoid us, the sonic emitters no doubt painful to their sensitive hearing. Some of them were at least half the length of the submersible. I heard one rebound off the hull, and the flimsy walls shuddered against the impact.

"This tin can better hold together," Canderous muttered.

"It's designed for deep sea travel!" Bastila snapped back. "You have no idea how much pressure it can withstand!"

Another thump resounded against the ship, and I bit back a moan. Never had the vehicle seemed so fragile.

"Give me the controls," Canderous demanded. "I've had more piloting experience than you."

To my surprise, Bastila released the steering column without argument. The submersible rocked wildly from side to side, and I realized in horror that the sharks were now deliberately smashing into it. Bastila turned to face me, reaching out a hand to place on my shoulder.

"I will attempt to calm them," she said softly. The faint light from the console showed the pallor of her face. "My battle meditation may help here. But I need your aid, Juhani."

"Mandalore's balls," Canderous muttered, pulling hard to the left. The submersible swerved sharply, slamming into another group of sharks as it did so. As I landed against the side window, I felt a mind brush against mine.

"Open your mind to me," Bastila demanded in a quiet voice. "I can do this, but it's difficult with such a foreign species. I need your help."

Bastila was asking too much; a temporary melding of minds required an inner concentration I found hard to grasp even on normal days. Such a bond would allow her access to my own reservoir of Force power, as long as we shared both a physical and a mental link. Her fingers dug into my shoulder insistently.

"I cannot do this!" I gasped. Fear clawed in my belly, and for a second all I could see was the inky black water, drowning my body and my soul, pulling me down in its never-ending depths...

"Dammit!" Canderous cursed. The ship rocked heavily to one side, and then the other. I was suddenly glad I'd had nothing to eat for the last few hours. "If you're gonna do something fancy, Princess, the time is now!"

"Juhani!" Bastila's voice was insistent, allowing no recourse for failure.

I closed my eyes, struggling to push back the terror. Her hand gripped me tightly, almost painfully, and I focused on that. _Pain. Yes, pain can be used as a focus. _That was something I'd learned, back on Tatooine. When my days had been filled with grief and misery and denial, with only rabid wraids around to keep me company. Sometimes physical pain was the only way to avert sheer insanity.

I breathed, concentrating solely on the fingers that dug holes into my shoulder. Bastila's mind touched mine again, but I was not quite ready. I drew in a shuddering breath, clearing my thoughts of everything but those fingernails pricking into my skin. While not the ideal way to open myself to the Force, peace and serenity seemed out of the question. _Revan would accuse me of taking the middle-ground._

I drew in the Force, and it responded. Hesitantly, I reached out to Bastila.

She reacted immediately, and I was swept away in the storm of her Force energy. I felt angry sparks of existence crowd around the submersible, writhing and attacking in a frenzy. I could even sense the simple life power of the coral that graced the ocean floor. Faint astonishment at Bastila's skill drove away my fear. _I cannot sense anywhere near this clearly._

Bastila _settled_ somehow on the swarm of sharks; soothing, calming, peaceful. The foreign feral rage that encompassed the animals – they seemed to react as one being – slowly dissolved. Some turned, and began to retreat. A palpable sense of confusion radiated from them, but the frenzied anger... the anger was disappearing.

My relief vanished a moment later. A presence - huge and vast and ancient - slammed into our joint awareness. It was focused directly on us. I felt the shock ripple from Bastila's psyche, as it must surely be emanating from mine. This mind, or soul, was immense. It far eclipsed anything I had ever sensed, and it was utterly foreign.

And very, very angry.

Suddenly, sharp painful fury came back to life threefold within the swarm. I jerked back to my body as the submersible was buffeted roughly from side to side. The sharks were renewing their attack with a vengeance.

Whatever that foreign presence was, it had made the firaxans a whole lot angrier.

Canderous was swearing in Mandalorian. Dazedly, I realized the submersible was going a lot faster than it had been. I slammed into the back of my chair as the ship collided sharply with the coral sea floor. A loud scraping resonated from the bottom of the hull, accompanied swiftly by the tearing sound of metal.

A high-pitched whistling of mist shot up from the floor, and my breath caught. _We've got a leak!_ Painful shards of water splattered onto my face, and I jerked away from the centre of the ship. I couldn't inhale; my throat was closing in stark fear.

"I can't see where that gods-cursed base is!" Canderous was yelling, but his voice seemed somewhat distant. I thought I heard Bastila reply, but could not make it out. My vision darkened. I couldn't breathe in, couldn't think for the sheer terror gripping my mind. _We're going to die! _I could feel the water rising up around my legs, the water clogging through my lungs, just like those nightmares when I had been but a young kit.

Rational thought was impossible; my mind stopped altogether and then mercifully, everything faded into oblivion.

xXx

Something flowed like honey through a body I'd forgotten. With a slow, dawning self-awareness, I realized it was the Force melting through my limbs. Sluggishly, I dragged myself back to consciousness; the training inbred in me would allow no recourse.

I choked, twisting abruptly to my side to spit out the acrid liquid from my lungs. Cool ferracrete lay reassuringly underneath my cheek.

"Juhani?" a voice queried. It took me a moment to recognize it as Bastila's.

The Force departed from my body then, leaving a variety of aches I would rather not have known about. Belatedly, I realized Bastila had been probing me for injuries. I rolled over and opened my eyes.

"Bastila," I acknowledged, licking stinging lips. Embarrassment settled over me that I had abandoned dignity in front of her. "Where are we?"

"We are in Hrakert Station," she said softly.

"Damn, there's at least ten corpses in this room!" Canderous' gruff voice called from further back. "Wake the Cathar up, would you? We should secure the area."

Shame flooded me further and I jerked upright. I did not want the Mandalorian to see me surrounded by the contents of my stomach. I accepted Bastila's arm unsteadily and slowly rose to my feet.

We were in a large room that had almost no lighting. One lone fluorescent tube still glowed faintly on the far side of the room. The steady lapping of water grated my nerves even as I realized we were in the docking bay of the base. Nearby, the submersible bobbed gently in the water. I gaped at it.

"H-how? How is that possible?" I mumbled. "There was so much water!"

Bastila looked at me oddly. "There was little water in the submersible, Juhani. Certainly not enough to bathe your feet in." She paused, and I felt her intent gaze on me. "Still, we were very lucky. I do not know how long the submersible could have withstood the attacks. The high-speed scraping against the coral damaged more than just the hull."

_There was little water? _I'd felt it, wet fingers of death scrabbling up my body. I swallowed, and refused to look at Bastila. I did not want to deal with the fragilities of my own mind just yet.

I peered into the shadows where Canderous was crouched down. Slowly my eyes adjusted to the poor lighting, and I could make out several shapes. From what Canderous had already said, they were all corpses.

"What happened here?" I asked softly. My inner peace was shattered, but slowly I was rebuilding it. I had to retain control of myself. _I have already failed. Too weak for the Dark Side, too fragile for the Light._

But Karon had faith in me. Somehow, I had to cling to that.

A weight was still pressing in on my temples - my very psyche itself - but it had become somewhat bearable. Perhaps because now I had both feet on a stable floor.

"I do not know yet," Bastila returned, her voice quiet and concerned.

Canderous grunted as he stood up, moving slowly towards us. He slung a pack over one shoulder and his monstrous blaster over the other.

"I got everything from the ship. Not much on those bodies though. There's certainly been a bloodbath here, there's Selkath, Republic, mercenaries... even some dead guy in a lab coat," he said shortly. "We should get going and look for a way outta here."

I glanced at him, and then back at Bastila. "The submersible?" I queried at last.

"It's pretty beaten up," Canderous answered me. "There's no way that's gonna get us to the surface in one piece."

I licked suddenly dry lips. _Trapped. _"Per- perhaps we could radio for assistance?"

Bastila shook her head. "The collision shorted out the electronics. We were lucky we could steer the submersible to safety."

"The comm.'s totally screwed," Canderous added. "I trans'd a help request when the ship first crashed into the reef, but I dunno if it got through."

Our conversation was interrupted by a high-pitched scream that reeked of anguish. My head shot upwards to stare at the only door; whoever that had come from was not far away.

As one, we moved towards the exit. Bastila and I both pulled out our 'sabers in readiness, but did not yet activate them. I had a healthy appreciation for both Bastila and Canderous as fighters, and did not feel alarmed for my own well-being. _Anything is better than being enclosed by all that water. _And yet, here at the bottom of the ocean, I was still trapped.

The next room was a foyer of sorts, lit only by an electronic short sparking against one corner. It threw up flickering, eerie shadows that danced alongside walls. I moved through first and noticed three exits - as well as a shaking male Twi'lek huddling in the centre, staring straight at us.

"How... how did you get in?" the Twi'lek mumbled, his words blurry and indistinct. I appraised him warily; his blood-splattered armour and vibroblade did not suggest he was a mere base worker. "They sent you, didn't they? You came with a ship?" Something like hope entered his voice.

"It is all right," Bastila said in a soothing voice. Canderous snorted behind me. "I am Jedi Shan, and we are with the Republic. Can you tell me your name?"

"Quick, we have to get out of here, we have to get away!" the Twi'lek demanded. The whites of his eyes were flashing wildly as he stared everywhere at once. I realized, then, that this man had a very tenuous grip on sanity. I shivered. _What is going on?_

"You are safe," Bastila placated, her voice calm and assuring. "What happened here?"

"The Selkath, they went crazy!" the Twi'lek blurted, his words rushing out in a flurry. "They started killing anything that moved. Someone must have triggered the defence systems too, 'cause all the droids activated as well!" The man had trouble breathing, inhaling in loud, staccato gulps. "We came down and secured the first couple rooms... there were bodies everywhere... and the Selkath came out... screaming and croaking their fishy little war-cries. They're dead! All dead! They swarmed out and over us. Everyone's dead!" His hands shook wildly on his vibroblade.

"Please, take a deep breath," Bastila went on in a peaceful tone. "You were one of the mercenaries sent by Roland Wann?"

"Yes, yes, but they're all dead! We have no time, we have to leave now!" His voice grew in pitch and frenzy, and his vibroblade rose into the air. I saw Canderous stiffen warily.

"We are here to investigate the base," Bastila told him calmly. "We will not let any harm come to you, you have my word."

"No! No! They'll come back! No! We must go now! I am leaving now!" His voice transformed into a screech, and something akin to uncontrolled aggression entered his eyes. His hand clenched around his blade, and it lifted.

"Calm yourself!" Bastila's tone turned authoritative.

"No!"

"Get out of my sight before I end your miserable existence," Canderous snarled viciously, raising his gun to point it menacingly at the Twi'lek. I gasped at about the same time as Bastila, reaching for my 'saber. I could _not_ let Canderous kill so glibly.

The Twi'lek let out a squeak of pure terror, and fled.

"No, wait! We will not hurt you, I promise!" Bastila called out in vain, but there was no response bar the fading sound of frantic footsteps. She whirled on Canderous in a fury.

"How dare you?" She fumed, colour marring the porcelain tones of her face. "We have no idea what is out there - you may have just condemned that poor man to death! How can you be so callous?"

Canderous shrugged disdainfully. "He was a second away from attacking us, princess. That would have been his guaranteed death, let me assure you." He smirked. "In fact, scaring him off gave him a shot at living. That kook's survived down here for days. I wouldn't be surprised if we run into him again."

Despite myself, I had to admit Canderous made a twisted sort of sense. Bastila threw him a look of pure disgust, and looked ready to throw him another sharp retort.

_Not again, _I thought in despair. "Canderous, do you have any thoughts on what happened to the base?" I cut in, desperately trying to distract them from another petty argument, and myself from the oppressing environment.

Canderous grunted. "An attack, obviously. Haven't seen any Sith corpses yet, and I don't know who else would bother. There's not much of worth on water worlds like Manaan."

"Not much of worth?" Bastila questioned, her voice slightly incredulous. "Surely you are forgetting about the kolto supply?"

Canderous laughed, a short, sharp bark. "Kolto may be the single best healing substance in the galaxy, princess, but the Mandalore are not as fragile as your Republic. We do not need to indulge in such weak healing substances when we enter battle."

"I shall refrain from pointing out that, weak as we may be, your people lost the last war." Bastila responded archly. I wondered if she noticed the irony of her own words.

"Bah!" Canderous snorted. "We were outnumbered five to one, and still your warriors ran and hid behind civilians like frightened old woman. You had not one competent commander in your cowardly ranks, princess. Well, not until your Jedi Reva-" Canderous halted his tirade abruptly, mid-speech. Shock rippled through his lined face, followed swiftly by a blistering anger.

Silence settled over us for a tense minute.

"Revan," he said finally, his voice quiet and deadly.

My spine stiffened. _He knows. He knows what Bastila did, back on Tatooine. _My gaze fled to her face; it was ashen.

"Canderous, you must reali-"

"I warned you, Jedi," he cut her off, still in the same soft tone. "Back in that cave. I said I would kill you if you tried any tricks on me again."

Bastila's face tightened; a glimpse of irritation slid between the shock. "You don't understand what is at stake here, Canderous. It isn't all about you- it is not even just about Revan-"

"Mandalorians keep their promises, Jedi," Canderous continued. The fact he no longer referred to Bastila as 'princess' hadn't escaped my notice. Fury and dented male pride rolled off him in waves; I could almost taste it. And I knew I had to do something before they both went too far.

"Stop it!" I screamed, loosing my tense nerves and building my fear into one long howl. A lifetime ago, I had once heard Cathar warriors howl in battle. It was a sound the galaxy would probably never hear again.

Canderous and Bastila started, both jerking around to look at me in surprise.

"Stop it," I reiterated, quietly this time. "Look at the mess we are in. We have no working submersible, we're surrounded by corpses and all- all that water... and- we should be working together!" the last few words stumbled out after one another. "This can wait until later!"

"Stay out of this, Cathar." Canderous' steely gaze had flicked back to Bastila, who was staring back at him determinedly, chin raised in pride. My hackles rose. I could not stop them if they were determined to fight, but Canderous could not believe he would best a Jedi, surely? Bastila's fingers twitched near her lightsaber. _And Canderous is not stupid, Bastila!_

"For the sake of the battles we shared on Taris and Tatooine," Canderous said at last. "I'll not kill you now. But don't think to cross my path again, Jedi. I'm going to find my own way out of this gods-cursed hellhole." The Mandalorian turned sharply, and strode towards the dark belly of the base.

"Not _kill_ me?" Bastila muttered, quiet enough so that the disappearing warrior would not hear her. Affronted pride burned pink spots into her cheeks.

My gaze stayed pinned on Canderous' retreating form. In this ominous pit, I knew there was safety in numbers. But I would not beg a Mandalorian for help – even one I had begun to respect.

Canderous reached a turn. He vanished, and did not look back.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_**Data **- Glad you liked the spice thing grin Heh, Revan on spice is truly a dangerous thought...  
**Brynn **- Glad you liked it! Totally agree about the personality wars, and the fragmented memories. Hope to see you writing soon.  
**Kosiah **- Heh just re-read your last review. You know, I hadn't even realized I'd capitalized Dashade. Darn this capitalizing thing :grin: Just trying to stay consistent is tough enough without working out which one is correct :) And thank you, as always.  
**snackfiend101 **- great to see you writing again!  
**Lord Valentai** - Truly glad you are still enjoying. I hope to see you writing again, I really want to know what happens next :)  
**Feza **- all will be revealed! But not in this chapter, ha ha :)  
**Mats Forsen** - eh yeah, I found it hard to compete with the previous chapter. This one is more of a serious one, but things will happen soon...  
**Xan318 **- I haven't always linked the flashbacks to things occurring in present... sometimes they are more just dreams... but it makes sense for them to have a sort of trigger - glad you liked. And everyone loves HK (well I do :)  
**Red Mage Neko** - Soon is such a relative word... grin  
**Lunatic Pandora** - Good point!  
**Firera **- Those tricks won't work on me :grin:  
**Lauren K** - Welcome! Thanks, glad you liked it that much :)  
**Lilina **- No worries, now I'm the one that's fallen behind on writing :) Well, real life does that to you every now and then..  
**Prisoner 24601** - Totally agree with you about Malak. I guess because he's so 2-D in the game, it leaves you a lot of room to explore and create his character, because there never really was one past the "I'm a big bad scary Dark Lord." Especially when you start delving into his motives for betraying Revan, and his relationship with Revan. I'm a sucker for tragic characters myself :)  
**LtSonya **- Thanks heaps :) I figured I'd bore myself if I kept it straight to the game plot.  
**kitty cutie2** - I'll try :)  
**Dark Lord Daishi** - Thanks for the reviews :) Heh, yeah I've been bad / slow. Blame it on summer, and procrastination. (and losing my hard drive, that was awful :P) Kylah will definitely be back, and soon. Anyway, hope you keep enjoying :)_


	38. Objective: Evacuate

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

**_Author's Note: Many thanks to Curtis for his help._**

* * *

**Chapter Thirty Eight – Objective: Evacuate**

_- HK-47 -_

* * *

Location: Abandoned Warehouse 

Scanning External Environment for Surviving Hostile Parties:  
…Result: Negative.  
…No Immediate Danger.  
Internal Response: Disappointment

Output: "Statement: We are liable to attract unwanted attention here, Master."  
Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.

Closer Optical Examination of Environment:

Corpse One – Male Dashade  
Cause of Death: Blaster Shot to Head  
Killed By: HK-47  
Count: HK-47 – 1

Corpse Two – Male Aqualish  
Cause of Death: Profuse Bleeding From Eye Sockets.  
Killed by: Jen Sahara  
Count: HK-47 – 1; Jen Sahara – 1

Corpse Three – Female Human  
Incomplete... Scanning for Lower Half...  
...Lower Half Not Found  
Cause of Death: Cut in Half by Lightsaber  
Killed By: Jen Sahara  
Count: HK-47 – 1; Jen Sahara – 1.5

... /a short time later/...

Final Count: HK-47 – 9; Jen Sahara – 11.5; Crossfire – 2  
Internal Response: Disappointment

Output: "Extrapolation: We should leave soon."  
Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.

Sensor Scan:  
Target: Jen Sahara  
…Location: Lying Immobile on Warehouse Floor. No Response to Verbal Prompting.  
…Physical Analysis: Minor Leaks in Organic Watery Shell. Not Life Threatening.  
…Body Language Analysis: Conscious. Unresponsive. Limp. No Response to Verbal Prompting.  
Conclusion: Jen Sahara Affected By Internal Logic Malfunction

Output: "Observation: That hole in the ceiling is not exactly subtle."  
Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.

Auditory Sensory Input: Cantina Door Opening.

Optical Sensors Focusing on Door:  
Observation: Door Open. No Life-forms Detected in Immediate Area

Internal Conclusion: Door was Opened by Life Form Located in Adjacent Room.

Primary Objective: Protect Master  
New Objective Accepted: Locate Door Opener

Boosting Power to Auditory Sensors  
Target: Adjacent Room.

Physical: Moving to Door

Audio Tracking: Series of Short Beeps  
Analysis: Activation of Communication Device

Physical: Moving through Door

Location: Cantina Bar  
One Sentient In Targeting Area

Optical Sensors Focusing On Organic Meatbag:  
Target Analysis:  
Species: Human, Male  
Facial Recognition Result: Negative  
Body Language Analysis: Shocked – Scared - Horrified  
Direct Threat Assessment: Minimal  
Indirect Threat Assessment: Moderate  
Temporary Name Assigned: Cantina Mook

Input – Cantina Mook to Transmitter: "You hired my warehouse for a few hours, asked for complete secrecy, and then scared off my clientele with a shootout! What the frell is going on? There's nothing but a huge pile of corpses, and an insane droid standing in the middle of it!"

Modification: Indirect Threat Assessment: Severe

Target Lock: Cantina Mook  
Initiating Combat...  
Hidden User Defined Sub-Routine Activated: Owner Command Required.  
Attempting Safety Override...  
...Factor: Jen Sahara Currently Unresponsive  
...Factor: Cantina Mook Severe Indirect Threat to Jen Sahara's Safety  
Override Successful

Physical: Firing Blaster

Visual Tracking: Cantina Mook Eliminated

Count: HK-47 – 10; Jen Sahara – 11.5

Scanning External Environment for Hostile Parties  
…Result: Negative.  
…No Immediate Danger.  
Internal Response: Disappointment

Situation Analysis:  
...Factor: Jen Sahara Currently Unresponsive  
...Factor: Hostile Parties Have Been Warned of Ambush Failure  
...Factor: Visible Damage to Building Exterior  
...Calculation: Chance of Incoming Hostiles: 96.45993  
Internal Conclusion: Remove Jen Sahara from Combat Zone Immediately

Physical: Returning to Jen Sahara

Output: "Statement: Master, it is time to leave."  
Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.  
Internal Conclusion: Lack of Movement from Jen Sahara is Jeopardizing Jen Sahara

Target Lock: Jen Sahara  
Physical: Light Push of Target  
Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara  
Internal Conclusion: Jen Sahara Requires Physical Help to Leave Combat Zone

Output: "Observation: You watery meatbags are so fragile."

Physical: Lifting Jen Sahara

Visual Tracking: Slight Movement from Jen Sahara.

Input – Jen Sahara: "Wha-?"

Light Impact Detected:  
Source: Jen Sahara (Current Owner)  
Combat Mode Not Initiated

Input – Jen Sahara: "HK, put me down!"

Physical: Releasing Jen Sahara

Input – Jen Sahara: "Ow! Bloody oath, HK, you didn't need to drop me!"

Output: "Explanation: Percussion maintenance is often the best course of action when proper repairs would be too time consuming. Sometimes all that is needed is a good swift kick-"

Interrupt: Input – Jen Sahara: "Thank you very much."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Sarcastic.

Sensor Scan:  
Target: Jen Sahara  
…Physical Analysis: Minor Leaks in Organic Watery Shell. Not Life Threatening.  
…Body Language Analysis: Tense – Shocked - Responsive.  
...Location: Standing Upright on Warehouse Floor.  
Conclusion: Jen Sahara is damaged but operable

Output: "Query: Are you functioning correctly now, Master? We should leave this place. Assessment: You are too damaged to withstand another attack."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Yes, I- I need to get out of here."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Distraught

Physical: Moving Through Door.  
Location: Cantina Bar

Scanning External Environment for Hostile Parties  
…Result: Negative.  
…No Immediate Danger.  
Internal Response: Disappointment

Input – Jen Sahara: "Gods, I can't think properly. I can't feel the Force. I don't want to feel the Force. Not... not anymore."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Hysterical

Auditory Sensory Input: External Cantina Door Opening  
Visual Tracking: Organic Meatbag Opening Door

Optical Sensors Focusing on Organic Meatbag:  
Target Analysis:  
Species: Quarren, Male  
Facial Recognition Result: Negative  
Body Language Analysis: Surprised - Wary  
Direct Threat Assessment: Minimal  
Indirect Threat Assessment: Moderate.  
Temporary Name Assigned: Shrivelled Squid Head

Target Lock: Shrivelled Squid Head

Initiating Combat...  
Hidden User Defined Sub-Routine Activated: Owner Command Required.  
Attempting Safety Override...  
...Factor: Jen Sahara Currently Hysterical  
...Factor: Shrivelled Squid Head Moderate Indirect Threat to Jen Sahara's safety  
Override Successful

Physical: Firing Blaster  
Visual Tracking: Shrivelled Squid Head Eliminated

Count: HK-47 – 11; Jen Sahara – 11.5

Input – Jen Sahara: "No! Dammit, HK, we can't just go around killing people! Not anymore!"

Output: "Statement: Master, we had already ended the existence of twenty-two organic meatbags. I did not surmise one more would make a difference."

Input – Jen Sahara: "No! I won't do it – I won't let her out! I don't know how she got in my head in the first place, but she's not going to take control of me! "  
Voice Stress Analysis: Hysterical

Visual Tracking: Jen Sahara has Crumpled to Floor.  
Auditory Input: Moan  
…Source: Jen Sahara

Situation Analysis:  
...Factor: Illogical Commands Issuing From Jen Sahara  
...Factor: Jen Sahara is Not Moving  
...Factor: Sensor Scans Equate a Hysterical State of Mind  
...Factor: Incoming Hostiles Probable  
Internal Conclusion: Take Quickest Measure to Remove Jen Sahara from Environment

Physical: Primary Blaster Set to Stun

Target Lock: Jen Sahara

Initiating Passive Combat...  
Hidden User Defined Sub-Routine Activated: Owner Command Required.  
Attempting Safety Override...  
...Factor: Jen Sahara Malfunctioning  
...Factor: Quickest Calculated Measure to Remove Jen Sahara from Danger  
Override Successful

Physical: Firing Blaster

Visual Tracking: Jen Sahara is Unconscious

Physical: Lifting Jen Sahara

Primary Objective: Evacuate

xXx

Scanning External Environment:

Location: Stolen Taxi. Ten Miles East of Mining Village  
Destination: Emnaad  
ETA: 23 minutes 04 seconds

Sensor Scan:  
Target: Jen Sahara (Current Owner)  
…Physical Analysis: Minor Leaks in Organic Watery Shell. Not Life Threatening.  
…Body Language Analysis: Limp - Semi-Conscious  
...Location: Front Right Seat of Taxi  
Conclusion: Jen Sahara is Waking

Input – Jen Sahara: "Ugh, where- where am I?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Groggy

Output: "Statement: Master, you are in a taxi headed for Emnaad. Suggestion: We disembark in the sentient suburbs outside the dome. The Selkath guard the entrances into the dome most rigidly."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Wha- what happened? What's going on?"

Output: "Statement: Master, I deemed it necessary to extract you from the combat zone in the most efficient manner. While running from the challenge of battle was regrettable, I am hard-coded to protect your safety first."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Most effici- what? You- you stunned me!"

Output: "Resignation: Much as it disappointed me to leave a potential conflict, Master, you were in no state to fight. Extrapolation: Or to remove yourself from danger."

Input – Jen Sahara: "I can't believe this. I feel like everything is crumbling around me. I don't know what to expect anymore."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Hysterical

Internal Logic: Jen Sahara Does Not Compute  
Hypothesis #1: Jen Sahara is Chemically Unbalanced

Testing Theory...  
Output: "Query: Master, what is wrong with you? Have you imbibed a hazardous substance in the last twenty hours?"

Input – Jen Sahara: "I – uh, well. Dammit, HK, that's not the fragging point."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Annoyed  
Observation: Master has not Answered Query

Hypothesis #1 Probability: 76.55312 percent

Output: "Suggestion: Master, let us find a place to rest in the outskirts of Emnaad. It often takes meatbags days to recover from the usage of pleasure drugs."

Input – Jen Sahara: "HK, I'm not bloody spiced, okay? And stop – stop damn well fretting over me!"

Output: "Observation: Master, you are behaving in an increasingly odd manner. I am merely attempting to restore your full functionality so we can once more dismember organics. Statement: I am programmed to perform all kinds of psychological assistance. Do you require some?"

Input – Jen Sahara to herself: "Stars, never thought I'd live to see a homicidal droid nursing me."

Output: "Indignation: Master, that sort of comparison is disgusting! I am a combat droid, not some sort of fluid-dispensing wet-nurse! I can hardly be blamed if I am programmed to look out for your safety."

Auditory Input: Angry Sigh  
…Source: Jen Sahara

Internal Conclusion: Jen Sahara is Functioning Correctly

Input – Jen Sahara: "Alright, HK, let's find some place to hide out until ... until I figure out what to do. I'm not going to use the Force though... I can't even feel it... I- dammit, I'll worry about that later. What the hell has been happening?"

Output: "Query: Master, are you experiencing faults in your internal memory core? Commentary: Organic meatbags have such delicate stamina's. Perhaps you should consider some cybernetic implants, Master. Memory lapses caused by pleasure drugs do not affect cybernetic-"

Input – Jen Sahara: "Sithspit, HK, would you stop with the spice comments? I'm just trying figure out everything... oh, sod it all. Let's just get out of here. And- and stop calling me master. It's giving me the creeps."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Irritated

Output: "Statement: You didn't have a problem with it before, Master."

Input - Jen Sahara: "I-I- well, I do now!"

Output: "Observation: I was under the assumption that organic meatbags enjoyed such forms of address."

Input - Jen Sahara: "Well, I'm not that sort of _organic meatbag_, regardless of who I have in my head!"

Internal Logic: Jen Sahara Does Not Compute  
Hypothesis #2: Jen Sahara has a Person in her Head  
...Physical Dimensions Do Not Compute  
Hypothesis #2 Rejected

Input - Jen Sahara: "Look... I just have a lot on my mind, okay? And an insane, psychopathic droid calling me master is hashing up all sorts of thoughts I really don't need right now."

Output: "Qualification: You **are** my master, Master. Was I not purchased legitimately? Am I stolen goods? Shall I report myself to the authorities?"

Input - Jen Sahara: "Whoa... slow down. Technically, Mission bought you, HK."

Output: "Quotation – Mission Vao: 'As far as I'm concerned, Jen can take care of you.' Quotation – Yuka Laka: 'HK-47, your new master is this human.' Conclusion: Both old and new Masters at the time of purchase transferred control of me over to you; therefore you are now my master, Master. "

Output: "Commentary: Having that blue brat as my master would be more than I could bear."

Input - Jen Sahara: "Mission... oh gods, what have I done?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Anguished  
Body Language Analysis: Despairing

Input – Jen Sahara: "Look... Just call me Jen, okay? It's not right... but... it'll have to do for now..."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Nonsensical

Output: "Explanation: You qualify as my master and I must refer to you as such. The legal requirements for models of my type are very specific, Master."

Input - Jen Sahara: "I thought you were meant to obey me, HK! What type of droid are you, anyway?"

Output: "Evasion: Oh... the illegal kind of model, Master... you know..."

Input - Jen Sahara: "Illegal?"

Input – Jen Sahara to herself: "Figures."

Input – Jen Sahara: "Hang on, there are legal requirements for illegal models?"  
Facial Analysis: Frowning

Output: "Answer: More than there are for legal models, apparently. That is meatbag logic for you."

Input - Jen Sahara: "Right, so... what does all this have to do with you calling me master?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Frustrated.

Output: "Explanation: Someone has hard-coded my system such that my current master always be addressed as such."

Auditory Input: Indistinct Cursing  
…Source: Jen Sahara

Input - Jen Sahara: "Remind me to rewire you, HK."

Output: "Objection: I can hardly be blamed for my programming, Master!"

Input - Jen Sahara: "Who programmed you anyway?"

Output: "Conjecture: I do not know... some organic meatbag?"

Input – Jen Sahara: "Wow, you're just full of answers today, aren't you?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Sarcastic

Input – Jen Sahara: "Fine. Call me master then. But at least stop killing everything in our path! Why'd you take out that Quarren anyway? He wasn't hurting anyone!"

Output: "Statement: I classified him as a moderate indirect risk to our survival, Master."

Input – Jen Sahara: "But you told me you couldn't kill without my direct order."  
Voice Stress Analysis: Frustrated.

Output: "Appeasement: I act only as you instruct me, master. Except in the event of you being unable to defend yourself."

Input – Jen Sahara: "What, so all you have to do is knock me out, and then you can go on a murderous rampage?"  
Voice Stress Analysis: Sarcastic

Output: "Objection: Your safety comes first, master! I am incapable of purposefully harming you!"

Auditory Input: Disgruntled Snort  
...Source: Jen Sahara

Input – Jen Sahara: "That still sounds like a weak excuse. Especially since I know how much you enjoy killing everything."

Output: "Answer: Even a droid has to have a little fun once in awhile."

Input – Jen Sahara: "I think you've had enough fun already."

Output: "Objection: You have had more fun than me, Master!"

Input – Jen Sahara: "Fun? You think- you think I had fun!"

Output: "Answer: Yes, master. By my count you had eleven point five units of fun. I only had eleven."

Input – Jen Sahara: "What? How the frell do you measure fun?"

Output: "Clarification: By the number of meatbag corpses, of course."

Input – Jen Sahara: "You...you kept score! I... how did you get a half? No... I don't want to know. I- ... I can't handle this at the moment. Just stop it... and stop with the meatbag thing already!"

Output: "Suggestion: Would gelatinous slush bag suffice?

Input – Jen Sahara: "No! Just leave it!"

Output: "Query: How about flesh filled biped?"

Auditory Input: Groan  
...Source: Jen Sahara

Output: "Suggestion: Cellular sludge sack?"

Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.

Output: "Suggestion: Aqueous anthropoid? Water logged goop-pouch?"

Output: "Query: How about my personal favourite - liquidious fleshbag?"

Visual / Audio Tracking: No Response from Jen Sahara.  
Conclusion: Jen Sahara Does Not Like Liquidious Fleshbag  
Internal Response: Disappointment

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_**Data - **Here's how Jen's doing...  
**Dark Lord Daishi **- Glad you enjoyed! Juhani being disturbed by water is just my spin on her character and the cathar race... a phobia she has and may need to overcome.  
**Lauren K **- Yep things aren't going well for anyone right now, are they:)  
**snackfiend101** - here you go :)  
**Feza** - I'll do my best to keep writing! I don't see myself stopping for good...  
**Kosiah **- Ahh I do like Juhani. But she is the most serious, as you said. Anyway, this chapter now posted! Loved your reaction :)**  
Red Mage Neko** - Thanks!_


	39. The power of a name

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one.  
_**

* * *

**Chapter Thirty-Nine – The power of a name**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

The city stank of cheap ale and decaying food, even outside. People from all the slummy walks of life – mostly mercs, peddlers and whores – filled the broken streets with eager offers and pleas for credits. In the distance the glittering dome of central Emnaad rose majestically, promising civilization and safety under Selkath rule. Here, in the wrecked, helpless outlying suburbs, nothing governed but strength in numbers – which usually meant the Exchange. At least there was a certain anonymity here. Another scruffy stranger staying out of everyone's way didn't draw a second glance. 

I couldn't brush off the taste of blood. I felt it, the coppery tang in my mouth. All those bodies, the death, the slaughter-

_-the power, to know that I have complete control, that I am the master, that victory is mine-_

The sudden sharp pain of cramp from my hand drove the dark voice from my head. I winced, and then realized my fingers were locked fiercely around the lightsaber hidden discretely under my robe. Slowly, I relaxed and drew my hand away. _No. No. I will not. _I'd lost one of the 'sabers, back at the warehouse. _Lost my sanity, too._

I'd flatly ordered HK to leave me alone and go find some way of getting off Rii'shn within the hour. That, perhaps, wasn't the brightest thing I'd ever done – letting HK lose without supervision – but at least I'd had the sense to command him not to kill a soul.

Far too many had already died by my hand in the last day alone.

My fists clenched again, and I realized I was shaking. _Get yourself together! Things could be worse... yeah, I could still be Dark Lord Bitch. _I was trying to stay angry, trying my damnedest to hold onto the angst over having such a disgusting piece of Sith filth trapped in my head. But chilling horror kept slipping through the cracks, gripping me with trepidation that far outweighed any patronizing revulsion I could muster.

_Revan's in my head. Revan's in my head. Revan's in my head._

That, of course, begged the question: _How did she get in there?_

And: _Who put her there?_

Which all followed onto: _How do I get rid of her?_

I swallowed convulsively, biting the insides of my cheeks in a fruitless effort to stay focused. The same thoughts still circled dizzyingly through my head ever since HK first extricated me from that ill-fortuned warehouse. I was getting nowhere. I couldn't even make sense of myself, let alone come up with a decent plan. I had to figure out what to do now.

_I can't keep blindly running. Somewhere, I need to look for help. _I thrust away the first obvious source – no sense in taking **that** course unless I had no other option. But what options were there on an unknown planet, with a powerful assassination order after me?

The only way I'd find out, was by exploring.

Even in the unguarded outlands of Emnaad, civilization still prevailed. Shantytowns of plimfoam and non-hardened plycrete had risen alongside the outer borders of Emnaad's dome. There was no government to speak of – apart from the Selkath city, this entire planet was riddled with Czerka outposts and Exchange figureheads all trying to make a buck from the mining industry. An overabundance of cantinas and black-market trade swamped the area, and I knew it was just the sort of place where anything could be bought.

But I'd already spent my last credits - on a full-length black cloak, that easily covered the blood stains and gaping holes in my armour. Walking shadowed underneath such a concealing garment may have looked suspicious had not every second sentient been clothed the same. _Let's just ignore the fact that black, sweeping cloaks are probably the sum total of Revan's wardrobe. _I winced. I couldn't even _think_ her name without cringing.

_And now I'm out of credits. It's Taris all over again. _Except this time, there was no suspicious pilot to help and harangue me into rescuing a snot-nosed Jedi. There was no Twi'lek street kid to befriend me, and acquire my aid in rescuing her overgrown side-kick.

Shame coursed through me at the thought of my former crewmates, and I closed my eyes in despair. _I'm being pathetic. I've got HK-47 instead. I figure I'll be out of here in an hour at the most._

_Let's just do what I came here for._

In places like this information was readily available – for a price. However, there was one free source, universally accessible through most of the galaxy – the lower-base holonet.You could find anything on the holonet. _Though usually not what you were looking for, _I added to myself sourly.

I'd wandered into a small emporium, where hawkers were trying to lure any passer-by towards their goods. I spotted a couple of old public terminals - the really antique ones that didn't even have a headset, let alone a virtual cerebral plug-in. _Not that I'd use it anyway; my mind's already a walking minefield. _With a sigh I tapped into one.

I didn't like computers. I had no real memory to back up why, just an inner feeling. But browsing the holonet was child's play – unless, of course, you needed information from the uppernets. I hoped I didn't – I wasn't even sure what I was looking for.

I switched to text feed only, turning off voice input. The last thing I needed was curious locals to overhear.

_Query: multiple personalities created by the Force_

I'd never heard of the famous dance troupe _'Multiple Personalities'_ until now, but apparently they were quite big in the Forlox Sector. Their smash hit, _'The force of our love,' _did nothing to help my search. I scowled, and cleared the screen.

_Query: suppressed memories of a different personality_

_Filter: Subject: the Force_

_Filter: Organization: Jedi Order_

Some Rodian psychoanalyst had become famous after publishing a thesis that claimed Order-trained Force-users not only suppressed their childhood emotions, but also often created a separate persona of themselves to fit in with the disciplined Jedi environment. I chuckled grimly and wondered if any Jedi had ever had a quiet word with him. Oddly enough, the Rodian had never published anything else.

_Query: Brainwashing extra identities_

_Filter: Subject: the Force_

_Filter: Organization: Jedi Order_

I was fast acquiring a painful headache. Limiting the query to Force related results generally pointed me to databanks I had no security clearance for. That, or visually guided tours explaining about the mystical nature of the Force. I grimaced, realizing I was fast running out of time. HK would soon be meeting me in an alley a block away, and I couldn't afford to hang around long on Rii'shn. The Genoharadan had already shown how powerful they were, by sending twenty assassins after me – two of whom where Dashade.

I shivered, jerked my attention back to the screen, and cleared the search results. A strange inspiration hit, and I changed the primary filter.

_Query: transplanting memories mindwipe_

_Filter: Organization: The Sith_

_Filter: Subject: the Force_

Half-way down the screen, I noticed a record pointing to a free archaeological databank. I would have ignored it, but as I glanced over the author's name, a quiet part of my mind stirred in recognition. Jen.

The entry was of one Pablo Hinterro recording the translation of an ancient journal. I'd heard of him – or rather, Jen had. There was a faint recollection of studying his work for a project back at the Academia. He was some famous archaeologist who'd spent his lifetime digging up findings on Eltron IV. Died on the primary moon of said planet when a cave mysteriously collapsed on him. But I – or rather Jen – had never read this excerpt before:

…

_Location: Seizon, moon of Eltron IV_

_I found a written journal in the dig site. Most of it had decayed; in fact only one page was legible. Odd that it was scripted by hand – the findings here are only a few centuries old, so I don't understand why a datapad or techJournal wasn't used. It's composed of lyr-bark paper, and written in Ancient Elisin._

_The rest of the journal has decayed. Considering the content of the one page I translated, I thought strongly about contacting the Jedi Order. Jayna convinced me against it; the site would likely be shut down for mere academics like us, and she is still firmly convinced this place was some secret Sith base used to experiment on the unfortunate._

_While I agree with her on the first point, I think with the latter she is letting her imagination run wild. More likely, perhaps, that this is the diary of a rambling madman._

_Regardless, here is my current translation:_

"_... fragmentation of self, and an increasing inability to distinguish between his real personality and the imbedded memories. Surely a mindwipe of the original identity is preferable, but I think Lord Sevra prefers this sort of twisted release of information, despite the lack of efficiency. This method of transplanting memories is still in its infancy, in fact I doubt any other Force user has ever conceived of it, let alone experimented._

_The subject is showing more signs of confusion, and his memories are beginning to mix with the embedded ones to the point where neither memory can be separated. I do believe he is well on the way to insanity, though at least he is not Force sensitive. I wonder how a Force sensitive would fare?_

…

I gave a bitter laugh. _Guess what? I'm Force sensitive and I'm still going insane!_

My hand shaking, I cleared the terminal screen.

_Is that my only option? Insanity?_ _All because some Jedi decided to put a couple of identities in my head? _The sound of harsh, quick breathing reached my ears, and I realized it was me. With deliberate effort, I drew in a deep, slow breath.

_Focus. I've been a Force user, a Jedi in the past if I believe Bastila. There must be a sane, logical reason for Jen Sahara... and for Revan. _What irony, that I knew _their_ names, but not my own.

Theories I could come up with – _they needed Revan for some reason – it was all a freak accident – maybe I agreed to it all – _but nothing really seemed right. And no matter how I tried, I could not think of a single reason why Jen Sahara was also in my head. _If this journal said their subject was going loony – then what about me, with **two** extra personalities?_

I couldn't escape the inevitable course of action. No matter how furious I was with her – no matter how much I would trust a Hutt before her – she was my only source of help. Insanity didn't appeal. And neither did letting Evil Bitch out. _Can I keep Revan at bay forever? Can I?_

I wasn't ready to reach out through the bond – touch the Force – just yet. The sheer life of it was too overpowering for me to handle just now.

_Find HK. Just keep moving, and stop thinking. _I blanketed myself with a detached numbness, and forced my feet to walk.

xXx

The droid's red eyes gleamed in the darkness of the alley as I walked towards him.

"Statement: Master, I have acquired us a shuttle. By my calculations, we have approximately twenty minutes to board and depart Rii'shn before members of the Exchange are alerted to the lockdown of their south-western landing bay."

Something clenched in my chest. "HK, you - you didn't – kill anyone!" It wasn't a question.

"Affirmative: No meatbags have had their miserable existences ended by my hand in the last hour, master." For some reason, his voice sounded oddly smug.

The plimfoam walls of the alley were cracked and stained with age and who knew what else. I drew in a deep breath. "HK, how in space did you lockdown an _Exchange_ landing bay without killing a single person?"

"Observation: It was a mindless oversight of those Exchange meatbags to leave all that Gelosian toxin lying around."

I stiffened. _Gelosian toxin? _I had no idea what it did, but if it could knock out a group of Exchange guards- "I thought you said no one had died!"

HK's eyes flashed. "Conjecture: My chemical database precisely states that Gelosian toxin is rarely lethal, provided medical assistance is sought within twenty-four hours! If there are any fatalities, then it is clearly due to a lack of proper medical attention."

I choked. "What are you saying? That's there's a whole bunch of comatosed Exchange thugs littered around this shuttle, that will die within a day if no one finds them?"

"Answer: Why, yes, master." Whoever created HK should have drawn a big, evil smirk on his blood red face.

_More blood on my hands. This time, I can't even blame Revan._

My teeth clenched; now was not the time for self-recriminations.

"Let's go then," I hissed. "And for future reference, HK, if someone dies as a cause of your actions, then it counts as killing them."

I could almost hear the droid shrug as he stepped forward to lead the way.

"Objection: Master, that is too broad a parameter! Scenario: If I was to buy the last kassi loaf, causing a settlement to starve to death before the next import, then technically I would be the cause of their death. Summary: This does not compute as killing the inhabitants of the settlement firsthand. You cannot expect me to accurately predict the future, master; not without additional core upgrades."

I bit back a frustrated growl as we turned the corner. "No, but even you can predict that people may die from Gelosian toxin!"

A Rodian garbed in combat armour glanced warily at me; belatedly I realized how loud my voice was and cursed myself inwardly.

"HK," I hissed quietly, cutting off whatever objection he was about to put forward. "Just tell me we don't now have the bloody Exchange after us as well?"

"Prediction: Provided we use the fake signature I acquired from the Czerka databanks, and depart this shuttle promptly at our destination, then the Exchange will have no source to lay the blame on but Czerka Corporation."

Despite myself and my growing horror at the bloodthirsty nature of this droid, I couldn't help but respect his abilities.

We walked quickly and silently to the landing bay.

xXx

The shuttle was small, and not made for intergalactic travel. Its fuel tanks could withstand only a handful of hours in hyperspace; fortunately, Manaan was not far away.

The repulsors hummed through the floor as I belted myself in, concentrating fiercely on the controls so as to forget the comatosed Exchange guards I'd walked over just minutes ago. I was becoming sorely tempted to melt HK down for scrap – yet so far, everything he had done had been under my command, no matter how brutally efficient he had been.

But it all added up to more people dead.

_The Genoharadan attacked me – I can't feel guilty for that!_ The Exchange guards, however, had simply been in the way.

I shivered at how cold my thoughts were sounding, and they weren't even coming from her. _No, not her – Revan. I will not be scared to name that bitch. Not if she's taken up permanent residence in my own head._

The shuttle manoeuvred quickly out of the landing bay, and I was glad of one thing – Rii'shn had no centralized government to speak of, and hence no firm astrogation laws. No official would bother with our ship leaving Rii'shn space.

As I activated the sublight drives, it occurred to me – I was flying a spacecraft. Confusion swamped my mind and I fumbled the controls, causing the shuttle to bank. _What am I doing? I'm flying a ship! _An alarm sounded from the console, and a dormant instinct took over. I steadied the ship, raised thrust to seventy percent, and increased the craft's attitude to match the computer's suggested exit trajectory.

"HK." My voice shook slightly as the vehicle stabilized. "You got me a ship like I asked. But how did you know I could pilot?"

There was only one other seat in the shuttle, which the droid was currently occupying. He was silent for a moment. "Answer: I had... assumed, master. Observation: This is highly unusual. My programming does not allow for assumptions of this type."

_You're not the only one who assumed. I ordered you to get me a shuttle, and didn't even think twice about piloting it until I was already in the sodding air! _I remembered the feeling I'd had, after we left Tatooine and I joined Carth in the cockpit – I was convinced I knew how to fly. It was a part of my past – _my_ past, not Jen's or Revan's – I was certain of that. _But how had a street kid learned how to pilot?_

"Statement: It is time to program in our destination, master. Where are we headed?"

I tore my thoughts away from questions only Bastila could answer. "Manaan," I said flatly. "We're going to Manaan."

HK paused, as if taking the time to process this command. "Commentary: While this would certainly not be expected by our enemies, Master, it will be difficult to travel there without being detected-"

"We're going to Manaan," I repeated. "I need to see Bastila."

His eyes flashed. "Statement: It will be a pleasure to combat a worthy opponent, Master!"

"HK." My teeth were clenched. "No more killing. No. More. Killing. Understood?"

How a droid managed to deflate in despair was beyond me, but HK did it. His shoulders even seemed to droop.

"Objection: Our en-"

"Shut up, HK. In fact, power down for the remainder of the trip."

HK dimmed as the sky transformed into space. Without the ongoing commentary from him, I was left with the sound of vibration coming from the small ship's engines, and the whirlwind of my own thoughts. I was headed back to Bastila – yet the last time I'd spoken to her, she'd sounded as if our association had ended. What had she said?

_**You forge your own path, Jen.**_

That had been over a day ago. There was nothing for it.

I opened myself to the Force, and reached for Bastila.

* * *

xXx

* * *

**Authors Note:**

Um, yeah. Bad me. Bad, bad me.


	40. Neutrality be damned

**_Disclaimer - See chapter one._**

* * *

**Chapter Forty – Neutrality be damned**

_- Carth Onasi -_

* * *

Admiral Dodonna's serious face vanished from the holoscreen, and so did my forced smile. I had to bite back the curses welling up inside. After all these weeks of fruitlessly running from planet to planet, I'd thought I'd be able to wash my hands of the Jedi and their supposed mission. As well as being reprimanded, I'd also been thoroughly disabused of that particular notion. 

With a muttered expletive, I clenched my fist and pounded it into the pristine table. Being white poraclay – some hardened alloy of ferracrete – I couldn't quite hold back a wince of pain.

_I need a drink. A Corellian flaming whiskey would do the trick. _But I'd kicked that habit a long time ago. Days that blurred meaninglessly into one another followed by the sharp shock of an official warning from my superior finally forced me to take charge of my life again. _Alcohol may numb the pain, but it doesn't dim the memories. _A tattered holo-picture of a beautiful woman and a sullen boy was all I had left from my past life.

_No, drinking doesn't help. _As I'd tried to explain to Jen back on Taris, those first few days when she was determined to live permanently in a cantina. _The one time she'd actually managed to get roaring drunk, Mission had to drag her back down to our camp in the Undercity. _I felt an angry scowl chase away the reminiscing.

_Damn you, Jen! Damn you to the Outer Rim, or wherever you've bloody disappeared to! _She could have killed us all by her sabotage on the Ebon Hawk, and I still wasn't sure whether that had been her intention, despite Canderous' flat statement to the contrary. _He may think it was merely a diversionary tactic, but how could she know for certain no one would get injured in the explosion? Or in the forced landing? _I'd seen the stark hurt look on Mission's face afterwards, and wanted to slap Jen for it.

_And now that Jen's gone, I would have thought I'd be able to get back to my normal life. _But no, Admiral Dodonna had other ideas. _Watch the Jedi she says, _I thought sourly. _Like Bastila ever tells me what she's up to. _

The last ten hours – ever since I'd entered the Embassy – were tiresome, to say the least. Roland Wann had grabbed me first, under the guise of a 'debrief'. In truth, he wanted to grill me for information about what the Jedi were up to. Two hours later, and I'd begged off to report to Dodonna. In reality, I'd gone to grab some lunch and a quick nap first. As much as I respected the admiral, I wasn't about to face one of her lengthy reporting sessions on an empty stomach.

Dodonna hadn't been impressed.

…

"_You've been travelling with them all this time, and you do not know anything about the Jedi mission other than it involves mysterious Force ruins?" Her voice bordered on scathing._

"_Admiral, you know how tight-lipped the Jedi can be," I objected. Like I hadn't tried! Retrieving information from Bastila when she wasn't inclined to part from it was like taking spice from a stoner. Damn near impossible._

"_For all that Bastila's a Jedi, Carth, she is also a pretty young woman." The Admiral had raised an eyebrow at me, as if conveying some message I was obviously supposed to understand._

_I blinked. "What does that have to do with anything?"_

_For once, a glint of amusement sparked in Dodonna's steely eyes. "I don't indulge in office gossip, but that doesn't mean I'm unaware of your reputation with the ladies."_

"_My- my- what? Ladies?" I managed to croak out. _What in space is she talking about? What reputation? _A slow burn of anger mingled with the frustration I'd been building up for weeks, and with a sense of something close to relief I felt my temper snap. "Admiral, I've been stuck with a Jedi brat who's lightsaber is firmly wedged up her arse; a crazy psychotic warrior who – guess what – can also use the Force; and an ex-Dark Jedi who not so long ago was sending rabid animals after anyone who dared to approach her! The only female around I can relate to is a Twi'lek pickpocket who hasn't yet graduated from childhood!" My voice rose to near-yelling pitch; vaguely I saw Dodonna's face pale slightly in surprise. "I haven't met anyone who could classify as a real lady in weeks!"_

_The Admiral straightened, and as her eyes flashed I realized just what I had implied. She stared at me stonily before responding. _

"_Thank you for that colourful commentary, Captain. Your disillusionment with my sex has been duly noted."_

_The heat of anger faded into the uncomfortable sensation of embarrassment; I swallowed, and belatedly tried to back-track. "Uh, sorry Admiral, um- obviously, I wasn't referr-"_

"_Save it, Captain," she snapped. "I'll overlook your impertinence this time, but you might do well to remind yourself that you are reporting from an official mission, not swilling beer and whining about women at the local cantina!"_

_I could feel humiliation warming my cheeks, and drew myself up stiffly. "Yes, Admiral."_

_She sighed in frustration. "Just find out something useful, will you?" Her tone had changed from angry to mildly annoyed, and I knew she'd let it go. I was lucky enough to enjoy a relatively amiable relationship with the Admiral; relaxed enough that at times – like today – I forgot entirely who I was dealing with._

"_I don't see why I should be spying on the Jedi," I mumbled. "I thought they were meant to be our allies."_

"_Don't be dense, Carth," Dodonna snapped. "You are there to also help, and you know it. The Jedi need an experienced pilot. But they can be as stiff-necked about 'Jedi business' as the Selkath are about neutrality. The Republic knows this mission is crucial to the war against Malak. We would, however, prefer to understand why – and that is where you come in."_

…

I sighed, rubbing my neck tiredly. The debrief had then shifted to my crewmates – and Dodonna was nothing if not thorough. She'd wanted to know every last detail from who Canderous had worked for back on Taris, to why a Wookiee would leave Kashyyyk voluntarily. I'd been about to interject sarcastically if she also wanted a run down on their eating habits, when she moved onto the one person I _really _didn't want to talk about.

…

"_Jen Sahara," Dodonna started. "Quite an enigma, this one. The only other survivor of the Endar Spire – and from your report, she had quite a lot to do with you escaping Taris alive. A scholar who has signed a five year contract with the Jedi Order, and then sabotages your ship on entry to Manaan and does a runner? Who is she, Carth? There's more than just a scholarly background here."_

"_Well, she can use the Force, for a start," I muttered. Oddly enough, this entire conversation was making me uneasy. I didn't like reporting on Jen – didn't like talking about her. Almost as if it were a betrayal. _And that just shows how crazy I am. She tried to kill me- kill us all, and I'm worried about explaining her personality and background to the Republic?

"_I wondered that," Dodonna mused. "Since you contacted the Republic when you left Tatooine, I've had men do thorough background checks on all your passengers. You have picked up some interesting crewmates, Carth, but this Jen Sahara is the most curious. Our reports indicate that she was severely wounded when Darth Revan's forces invaded the planet Deralia. A medic's report lists several broken ribs, massive head trauma, multiple fractures in her spine – to name but a few. Apparently this scholar was the victim of days worth of torture by the Sith before the Jedi rescued her. In short, Carth, her injuries should have killed her."_

…

Even now I couldn't believe it. _Jen, captured by the Sith? Tortured by them? _The same woman who on Taris had professed – if only to wind me up – that maybe the Sith had the right idea? _But then it could explain her mood swings... her violent outbursts... _Once, on Taris, she'd fainted in the middle of the street. She was a mass of contradictions – she could wield the Force, yet she was scared enough of the Jedi to crash the Ebon Hawk and run. I'd seen her risk her life for Mission more than once – a street urchin she barely knew – and then she turned around and left us all in the lurch.

_Oh, what does it matter. Jen's well and truly gone. _I should have been used to betrayal by now – and hashing it over in my mind accomplished nothing. The others were around somewhere; it was probably time I found them. Before I'd contacted Dodonna, I'd tried to meet up with the others with no success. Even Roland Wann had disappeared, and usually that smarmy commander was everywhere. Now, hours later, I couldn't help but feel surprised that Bastila hadn't bugged me yet.

I sighed irritably, and left my private quarters. I would have preferred not to contact Dodonna from my own holo-connection – I wouldn't put it past Wann or some of his skulking subordinates to tap into every broadcast leaving the Embassy – but it was impossible to find privacy anywhere else. At least most of the grunts were happy enough to chat to me. Other than a few green younglings who wouldn't stop staring at me, I found most of the Fleet soldiers to be quite friendly.

The Republic Embassy was a pretty swish joint. The shining opulence of furnishings – even the waxed floor that had not one jot of dirt on it - reminded me of the Republic apartments back on Coruscant. I'd never felt comfortable there – maybe it was something to do with growing up as a dirt-poor farmer back on Telos. I wasn't ashamed of my background, but I'd met plenty of officers who seemed to think I should be. Generally officers who, like Wann, had been promoted due to their lineage rather than any real merit.

For all that I knew the Republic to be the right side in this war - for all that it stood for freedom and justice – sometimes I wondered just how rotten the core of it was. At the end of the day, I supposed that slime trickled to the top of all organizations, no matter what they stood for.

I turned left down the east wing, heading towards the barracks. Striding towards me was one of the Senate liaisons, an Ensign named Gerith I'd spoken to earlier. Upon spotting me, his merry face broadened into a grin.

"Carth," he greeted. "All is well?"

I smiled briefly in response. "As good as can be expected, I guess. You haven't seen any of the Jedi about recently, have you?"

Gerith rolled his eyes in disgust. "No. To be honest, I try to stay out of their way. Politics, y' understand. Jedi often want to know information I'm not obliged to impart."

I nodded in understanding. The soldiers who filled the ranks of the Republic Embassy on Manaan were either Fleet military or Senate bureaucrats. Gerith belonged to the latter group, and was one of the few of which I could stomach. Most of the civil servants had the same outlook on Fleet soldiers that Gerith did on the Jedi.

"What about the Ebon Hawk?" I broached quietly. Gerith had been chasing up the red tape our ship was embroiled in.

His countenance lowered further. "No luck, I'm afraid. Some of the more conservative Selkath seem determined to use this as an example. Say that any ship used in a fight on Manaan territory will be seized."

I clenched my teeth. "There was no fight," I ground out.

"True, but it sounds like it came close, right?" Gerith shot me a piteous look. "I'm sorry, man, but the Selkath are acting like kath hounds guarding a hoarde of iriaz bones." He shrugged. "I'll do what I can."

_Damn you, Jen. Not only did you almost kill us, but you also lost our ship. _But if what Admiral Dodonna had said was true – if she'd almost died at the hands of the Sith – then who knew what was going through her mind? Maybe the thought of anyone who could wield the Force had sent her running scared. _Jen? Scared? _The thought was almost laughable – except that she had tried to run before. More than once.

Two figures turned the corner up ahead, and I straightened as I recognized the Jedi Karon. Gerith turned to follow my gaze, and grimaced.

"I'm outta here – paperwork to do."

He flicked a hand in acknowledgement as I nodded farewell, moving to intercept Karon. The Zabrak had stopped in the middle of the corridor, her head cocked as if she was listening for something. A distracted frown lined her face, and I walked within five paces of her before she even noticed me.

"What is it, master?" a timid voice behind her asked. A Twi'lek male stood nervously in her shadow, young eyes trained on her. He was an adolescent, and judging by the tan robes, Karon's apprentice.

"I'm not sure, Lars," Karon murmured, and then turned to greet me. "Hello again, Captain Onasi."

"Master Jedi," I greeted, trying to keep my voice respectful. A twinkle of amusement sparked in Karon's bright eyes, and I wondered if she'd picked up on my irritation. _Maybe I'm just not good with authority, full stop. _"Have you seen Mission – the Twi'lek girl? Or Bastila?

The Zabrak's mood sobered. "Mission left during the night, Captain Onasi."

"Left?" I blinked. "What do you mean, _left_?"

The Jedi sighed. "I believe she has gone to find her own way in life, Captain. Of course-" she cut herself off, turning her head abruptly to stare into the distance, eyes narrowed.

"Her own way in life?" I all but exploded as my mouth dropped open. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Karon shook her head, as if shaking off sand flies. "That she is old enough to decide what she should be doing. Do not worry, Captain, her Wookiee friend is with her, and I imagine that useful little droid followed as well."

Vaguely, I realized I was gaping. I hurriedly shut my mouth, and felt anger churn within me again. _Dammit Jen, this is all your fault! Mission's too young to be out here – by herself... _"I have to find her," I said abruptly. "She's only sixteen! What does she think she's doing?"

Karon's wise eyes rested on me. "I was of the understanding that she had been on her own for the majority of her life, Captain. And do not underestimate her friend Zaalbar. I sensed true devotion from him."

For all that I disliked the patronizing speeches Jedi often spouted – and Jedi Masters were the worst – Karon's words did have a calming effect on me.

"I can't believe she'd just go, without saying goodbye," I muttered, scowling. I couldn't help it; I had a soft spot for Mission. She was impetuous – idiotic at times, often naïve despite her street smarts – _look at the way she kept defending Jen_ – but she truly had a heart of gold.

The Twi'lek boy behind Karon was staring at me with interest. I transferred my scowl to him, and he glanced away, a faint blush colouring his cheeks.

"Where's Bastila then?" I asked abruptly. Karon's attention had transferred once more into the ether – I wondered briefly if the Jedi had any sleep last night – but at my query her head snapped back to face me again.

"Commander Wann has not informed you?" Her voice was sharp.

"Informed me of what?" I could hear the annoyance creeping back into my voice. I knew I was acting like an old grouch – but dammit, nothing had gone right ever since Dodonna had ordered me to pilot the Endar Spire.

"Bastila – along with Jedi Juhani and Canderous – left four hours ago to Hrakert Station."

"Hrakert Station?" I snapped. "What- where is that?"

Abruptly, Karon's attention was jerked away from me again, and this time I heard her gasp audibly.

"Master?" the young Twi'lek queried in a hesitant voice.

"Where have they gone? And why aren't I with them?" I demanded, scowling at the Jedi. _I can't believe this! Why doesn't anyone ever tell me anything?_

"Master, I-I can feel something," the boy stammered. I glanced back at the young Twi'lek, and with something close to surprise noticed he was trembling.

"Yes, Lars, I sense it too," Karon murmured absently, but a dark frown lined her face. She whirled back to stare at me intently. "Captain, is there a back entrance into this Embassy?"

The stark alarm on her face dissipated my grouchy mood. "Not that I'm aware of," I answered slowly. "But I don't really know the layout of this place."

"I must see Commander Wann," she said urgently. "I sense-" she cut herself off mid-sentence, her body stiffening. The boy called Lars gasped.

"The Force," he mumbled. Shock widened his eyes. "I can feel them using it. There's so many of them!"

"Peace, Lars," Karon said curtly.

"What's going on?" I asked, aware that my hand was gripping the blaster hoisted on my belt. There was an old saying amongst the Fleet pilots I used to serve with. _An unsettled Jedi stirs more than just a mynock's nest. _

"Dark Jedi," Karon responded quickly. "Ten of them. Close. We must warn Roland!"

She whirled around, breaking into a run. The soldier in me responded to her barked order, and I sprinted after her automatically. The Twi'lek boy was gasping behind me.

I'd yanked out my blaster, racing down the gleaming hallway. Adrenalin pumped through my veins at the unseen threat. I didn't hear any sounds of battle, no alarms warning of invaders were ringing, but Karon was running like her life depended on it.

As we passed the barracks, one of the grunts stepped out, his face a blank slate of shock as he took me in.

I ground to a halt, as Karon and Lars disappeared further up the hallway. "Where's Wann?" I shot out.

He shrugged, inquisitive alarm sparking in his eyes. "No idea, captain. What's happening?"

"A possible attack," I answered curtly. "Be ready for action!"

His mouth dropped open in disbelieving surprise, but I didn't have time for explanations. I ran, determination and fear forcing my legs. Worried faces of soldiers and civil servants alike blurred into the background as I sprinted down polished corridors. Some had been staring after the racing Jedi, only to see me running after her. I ignored various questions thrown in my wake.

Finally I lurched into the command room, panting with exertion. _You're getting soft, Onasi._

Roland Wann was scowling angrily at Karon, who was more flustered than I'd ever seen her. The Twi'lek boy was all but hopping on his feet in anxiety. Several techs had stopped working on their consoles to turn and stare at the ensuing confrontation. It didn't take a second glance to see that Roland wasn't interested in what Karon had to say.

"Not this nonsense again! I told you before, Karon, I have no time for Jedi foolishness!"

"You would ignore this threat, Commander?" The Zabrak's voice had risen in intensity. "I assure you, I am not issuing warnings for the sake of my own health. You must evacuate. Now."

Red blotches of frustration emerged on Wann's face. "Come on, this is Ahto City! The Sith wouldn't dare attack us here."

"Then explain why there are two groups – _two, _Commander – of Dark Jedi, from opposite directions, heading directly towards this establishment?" Karon fixed her stare on Roland, who turned away to glare at the gob-smacked techs.

"What are you doing – get back to work!" he ordered, waving his hand. His eyes caught on me as I joined them. "Captain, talk some sense into this Jedi, will you? Manaan is ruled by their forsaken neutrality laws!" With an angry sigh, he turned to lean over his console, his back to the Jedi.

I was taken aback, to say the least. I might not trust the Jedi, but I wasn't blatantly stupid either. "Uh-"

"Roland." Karon's voice was low, deep, and almost frightening. I didn't have to feel the Force to know that it was at work. Roland appeared to turn around against his own volition. "You refuse to evacuate? You refuse to call the Selkath for aid? You would ignore this threat, when the lives of all your men are in your hands?"

"I will not be made to look like a fool in front of the Selkath!" The words tumbled from him. "They already oppose us at every turn, and what with the mess down on Hrakert Station – I cannot afford to have the Republic's position on Manaan weakened any further by a ridiculous call for Selkath aid from a non-existent threat! The Sith probably know you are here, Karon, and are trying to frighten you – that's what they do best! If we have Jedi on Manaan, why shouldn't they have Dark Jedi? They wouldn't attack – I refuse to believe it."

Her face was tight. "You refuse to believe it, Roland, because you do not wish to. That does not mean it will not come to pass."

The tension between the two was more than palpable – the Republic officer, face chubby with good living and little exercise, beady eyes staring defiantly into Karon's dark turquoise gaze. I could understand where Roland was coming from – politics are always more crucial than they should be – but how could he ignore the safety of his own men? From Dark Jedi?

"You mentioned two groups, Karon," I cut in, my silence finally broken. "Where are the exits to this place?"

Roland looked relieved at my interruption. "There's only the main one. Which is heavily guarded by Selkath security cameras – another reason why the Sith wouldn't try anything. The Selkath would pick them up immediately, and there would go their share of the kolto supply."

"And yet I sense six Dark Jedi outside in the quadrant," Karon stated.

"So?" Roland growled. "You _sensed _ten of them yesterday, and the worst thing that happened is that it was Private Laconi's turn to help the cook! Could it be your sense radar is a little faulty, _Master_ Jedi?"

Lars gasped. Karon's eyes narrowed, and I bit back a groan.

"Do not act foolishly, Roland, it does not become you. These are the same ones from yesterday, but now much closer and split into two groups. Attacking from both sides."

Roland threw his hands up in disgust. Idly, I noticed all the techs had stopped working again. "Give me a motive, Karon – why would they attack us and risk everything? Not to mention there's only one entrance – unless they want to cut through the roof or swim in from the docking bay!"

All expression fled from the Zabrak's face. "The docking bay," she breathed. "That would explain why I sense them beneath me." Her eyes snapped back to Roland. "Risk the lives of your men if you wish, but at least keep your attention focused on the main entrance. I urge you again to evacuate, or at least call for aid. I shall move to the docking bay to pin them down."

The Jedi whirled around and stalked out of the room. Lars almost stumbled in his haste to run after her. I jerked my attention back to Roland, who was glaring furiously at the exit.

"She refuses to listen to reason!" he seethed. "The Sith attacking makes no sense."

_And since when did the Sith make any sense? _Karon's reaction had certainly unsettled me, and going by the terrified expressions on the various civilians in the room, I wasn't the only one. The safety of the men here had to come first. I bit back a sigh and tried to force a placating tone. "Still, it doesn't hurt to evacuate, sir."

Roland's eyes snapped back to glower at me. "So not only would you have us lose face in front of the Selkath, but also leave this base unguarded for any man off the street to wander in? Don't tell me you actually believe the Jedi, Captain?"

I felt myself scowling in return. "You think she's just making this up, sir?"

He sighed angrily, and turned to glare at the techs who were now listening in to our conversation. Most of them turned quickly back to their consoles. "No, I don't, captain. But I refuse to believe the Sith would dare attack us here. They are trying to provoke us into a fight with a show of strength – that is all." At my disbelieving look he rolled his eyes. "Come on, Onasi! Why would they risk their kolto supply? And why would they bother infiltrating the Republic base? What? To get at Karon?"

A sobering thought struck me. _Taris. _Malak's forces had laid waste to the city to kill one person. And the Sith probably thought she was safely housed inside the Republic base right now. "No, not Karon," I breathed, horror striking into my gut. _Karon is right._ "Bastila. They're after Bastila."

Roland dropped his head into his hands and groaned. "Captain, I repeat, the Sith would be throwing away their kolto supply if they dared attack-"

"Do you think that would matter to them if they could finally kill Bastila? She's central to our war effort, Wann! _Where is she?_"

"Far away from here! Jakobs – where do you think you're going?"

One of the techs had been surreptitiously edging towards the door. His face blanched and he looked down at the floor sheepishly. "Er – bathroom break, sir."

"Get back to work – now!" Roland screamed, his face mottling with fury. He looked about one step away from losing it completely, and must have realized this himself. The tech scampered back as Roland took in a few deep breaths.

"We need to get them out of here," I demanded softly, lowering my voice to a whisper. I could hear pounding in my head. While Karon's predictions had worried me before, only now did they seem like a plausible reality.

Intense dislike was aimed directly at me as Roland's gaze bored into my own. "Have you forgotten your position? I've made my decision, _captain._ I will not have you countermanding my orders!"

_Stiff-necked idiot! He would throw away the lives of his men rather than risk losing face? _Whatever respect I may have had for the aging commander was fast disappearing. The base was full of civilians that would be cut down like renni grass by Dark Jedi. Somehow, I had to convince Roland the threat was real – this place had to be evacuated. I searched the room frantically before my gaze caught on the console next to Roland. An array of camera outputs stared back at me.

"Bring up the cameras for the docking bay," I ordered. My tone was probably too commanding, as Roland shot me an incredulous look. I scowled. "Commander, we should at least be ready!"

He grunted, but leaned forward to switch the cameras. A view of Karon and her apprentice standing ready in an empty room greeted us.

"See? Nothing." Roland's voice was sanctimonious, and almost smug.

"The main entrance?"

Roland tapped another key, and a dual screen of an almost empty foyer appeared next to the docking bay. A bored receptionist was idly painting her nails at the desk. I could feel Roland's irritated glance on me, but kept my gaze glued to the console.

"Where is Bastila?" I repeated quietly. "They're after her, Roland, I'm certain of it."

"She's on a mission, captain – one I won't talk about here. But there's no way the Sith can find her."

I jerked back to face him. I had almost forgotten my earlier anger at not being informed – I was part of Bastila's crew, dammit – but now was not the time. _Roland's not far from chewing me out. Again. _Still, I was fast reaching the point where I didn't care. "We need to warn her."

"Spread the panic far and wide, huh, captain?" Roland bit out sarcastically. He was staring at the screen, and a frown grew slowly on his face. "That's an incoming submersible. Odd, we're not expecting one for another hour."

Trepidation crawled down my spine. I swung my gaze back once more to the console. Karon was standing near a surfacing submersible, her cyan lightsaber illuminating the screen. Behind her was the scared Twi'lek, clutching a short green 'saber. "Do you recognize the ship?"

The horrified expression plastered over his chubby face was answer enough. The dual camera of the entrance foyer blinked at us as six black figures materialized.

The blood drained from Roland's cheeks as terror uncurled in my stomach, but to give the blundering commander credit, he was fairly quick on the uptake. He all but shoved me away from the console, hurriedly switching to broadcast.

"Selkath Authority: this is Commander Wann from the Republic Embassy signalling a distress call. The Embassy is under attack from unknown forces. We request aid. I repeat: we request aid!"

One of the civilians in the room screamed and dashed for the door.

"Halt!" I yelled. "The entrance is blocked off – stay here!"

The tech shot me a terrified look but bolted from the room. The remaining occupants turned to stare at me.

"All soldiers to the command room! We are under attack!" Roland hollered through the intercom. I could see sweat glistening on his broad forehead. "All non-military personnel return to your rooms and lock your door until further notice! Do not attempt to engage the enemy!"

I quickly surveyed the room – a large half circle populated with consoles that had two direct exits. Ten people in here, most of them techs. They were no fighters; I didn't need a second glance to see that. One sole Fleet soldier had staggered towards Wann, looking for direction. Her face was pale but set, and she held a small Echani pistol in readiness.

"Guard the south exit," I ordered, pointing. "Any weapons here the techs can arm themselves with if need be?"

"_Commander Wann, this is Selkath Authority," _a hissing voice came haltingly from the comm.. _"We have lodged your distress call and dispatched a peacekeeping corps. We do not tolerate violence on Manaan!"_

"I didn't exactly invite it," Roland spat through gritted teeth. "Just get me some damn help before we're slaughtered!"

The female soldier shook her head at me, then paused. "There might be a few blasters in the locker."

"_What is the nature of your attackers?"_

I kept my blaster and eyesight aimed on the second door while motioning the closest tech towards me. "You. Go into the locker and distribute whatever weapons you can find amongst the techs. Stay in the far side of the room, away from the doors."

The tech nodded, his eyes round in fright.

I turned back to Wann who was staring fixedly at the console. I had a brief glimpse of the once-bored receptionist being cut down by a glowing red blade before the camera shorted out.

"Sithspit!" Roland cursed. The other screen showed two figures advancing on Karon. Another two were climbing out from the now-docked submersible.

"_Repeat: what is the nature of your attackers?"_

"They're bloody Sith!" Roland screamed into the console. "Who else would attack the damn Republic Embassy? Now get me some help!" He angrily cut the transmission with a punch to the desk.

Warning alarms jangled loudly, and I had a sudden recollection of the Endar Spire. My jaw clenched. _Curse those Sith! There's too many people here... _my one brief thought was gratitude that no one from the _Hawk_ was still in the Embassy.

I looked back towards the console in time to see one Dark Jedi push Karon out from the docking room, and out of view of the camera.

"Not even Karon can survive four of those bastards," Roland breathed in horror. His face was white as he stared at the screen, terrified.

"She needs backup," I muttered. One of the black robed figures had finally spotted the camera. He raised his arm, pointing towards us as lightning arced from his fingers, shooting straight in our direction. The screen went black.

"Check what other cameras are online," I snapped out at Wann. "We need to track their movements." I turned to face the techs – they were hurriedly passing blasters amongst themselves; not a one of them appeared comfortable holding a weapon. Roland's eyes were still glued to the console, but I noticed he'd finally pulled out his blaster.

"Stang, they've got to the control room! They've destroyed the communications array." Roland swore, and slammed his fist down next to the screen. "Now we won't know when the Selkath arrive."

_How much help would they be, now?_ I looked up at Roland. "Dark Jedi in the foyer," I reminded him. _Our call for aid has probably done nothing but send the Selkath to their deaths._

His eyes met mine, and then looked away. He didn't say anything further.

"How many soldiers here, sir?"

"Thirty-three currently stationed on base."

I blinked. "_Only? _In the main Republic base on Manaan?"

"This is an Embassy, first and foremost, captain!" Roland shot back. "We have other troops patrolling the seas. Some are stationed with the Selkath."

The swishing noise of a door opening grabbed my attention, and I swung my blaster around to face the south door the female soldier was guarding. She gave out an audible sigh as two figures clothed in Republic uniform ran inside. I recognized one as a guard who'd escorted us into the base. Both were armed with stun sticks, and moved to flank the Commander.

"Karon's hemmed down in the barracks. Holy stars-" Roland cut himself off, but motioned at the screen. I glanced down – the barracks were littered with corpses. Republic corpses. My gut clenched.

"Curse those black-hearted bastards!" Roland spat. "How are we to survive this?"

Someone whimpered from the far side of the room. _Dammit. Likely there are few soldiers left. _My attention sharpened on the screen. A dazzling display of red and light blue sparks shone from one of the remaining cameras. I had no idea where her apprentice was, but Karon was good – that much I could tell from the terminal.

"We should get the techs out," I said abruptly. "They're nothing but fodder here."

Roland barked in disbelief. "Captain, these are Dark Jedi. _We're_ nothing but fodder."

Internally I conceded the point, but now was not the time to show despair. "We should get ready, though. Blasters are all but useless against Dark Jedi. Any grenades here? Flamethrowers?"

Roland was shaking his head. "You're lucky we had those blasters in the locker."

I glanced down at mine, and bit back a curse. My one and only vibroblade – courtesy of Jen's midnight jaunts back on Taris – lay back in my quarters. My only chance was to catch one of them unawares.

_The Selkath are going to get ripped to pieces – we can't rely on them, either. _Our only hope was Karon, but she was alone – and I spotted another Dark Jedi entering the barracks to face her. _Two against one. There were four earlier. Did she kill two of them, or are they elsewhere now?_

"Can you see any soldiers?"

Roland leaned forward to cycle through the remaining cameras. "There's six in the mess. That's – that's next to the barracks. They seem to be shooting at – something..."

I leaned closer; sure enough, a small group of soldiers were panicking, and firing blasters through the room. One of the soldiers fell down, clutching his leg. I grimaced; it looked like he'd been hit by friendly fire. Another arched up off the ground, mouth opened in a wordless scream.

"Where is the fiend?" Roland growled. "I can't see any Dark Jedi on the screen!"

The soldier collapsed into a crumpled heap. Another threw a knife directly across the room. The knife jarred in mid-air; a sparkle of blue static heralded the appearance of a black robed figure yanking the short blade out of his shoulder.

"Stealth field generator," Roland spat. "You would've thought they wouldn't bother with those things."

"It's a good way to create panic," I muttered absently. "Throwing Force powers around while practically invisible." Three of the soldiers retreated hastily from the room as the Dark Jedi hurled the knife back to its owner. I winced, closing my eyes reflexively as the Republic combatant buckled, hands scrabbling at his throat. When my eyes opened again, it was to appraise the unreal sight of the Dark Jedi lying comatose on the ground.

"What?" I exclaimed in disbelief.

"The injured man – the one who got a hole in the leg." Roland fired me a stunned look. "He shot the sithspawn in the back."

"Fancy that. Guess you don't need to be a Jedi to kill those bastards."

Back in the barracks, Karon was being pushed hard. One of the Sith parried her 'saber as the other slashed at her leg. Karon jumped back, but it looked like a hit.

"I'm heading out," I said flatly. "There were three soldiers who ran from the mess. I'll find them, and go help Karon."

Roland's jaw dropped. "Are you crazy, Onasi? Those Dark Jedi will cut you to pieces!"

Determination flooded through me. "Maybe I can get a lucky shot in too. It's better than waiting in here – Karon's our only hope, Wann, and she looks like she needs all the backup she can get. We can't count on the Selkath. Lock down the doors after me."

I heard one of the techs whimper as I strode towards the door, my gun raised.

"Captain-"

I turned back to look at Wann, cloistered between the two soldiers. Their stun sticks looked about as effective as the twigs the Sand People had used on Tatooine, and the Commander had aged a year in a day. _Dammit, the Republic should have been prepared for this. We allowed Manaan's neutrality to lure us into complacency._

Roland stared steadily at me, one soldier to another. "Good luck out there."

I nodded, smiled grimly, and walked out the door.

xXx

I slammed myself back against the wall, blood thumping so loud in my own ears that it was hard to hear anything above the pounding. I thought I'd heard soft footsteps around the corner; now all I could hear was my own quick breaths. It was a short walk from the command room to the mess, but with Dark Jedi on the loose, it seemed like an eternity.

It wasn't the first time I'd been up against Force users. Apart from those idiots who'd attacked Bastila in Anchorhead – _again, Malak's forces after Bastila, I should have believed Karon earlier_ – I'd encountered Force sensitive Sith in the past few years when circumstances had taken me out of the skies. I'd seen firsthand what damage they could do.

The worst battle was on Duro, where I'd been grounded when the hangar bays had been destroyed. Our squadron was attacked by a company of Sith led by the ex-Jedi Talvon Esan. I recognized him from the Mandalorian wars – I'd served under him directly.

Bitterness flooded my mouth. It was all too easy to distrust and fear the Jedi. Too many of them fell to the other side.

The sudden cessation of wailing alarms caught my attention – someone had finally disabled them. If the Dark Jedi had been aiming for a stealthy approach, they'd done a pretty poor job – but stealth had hardly been needed.

The sound of harsh panting reached my ears; it took me a second to realize it wasn't my own. I froze, and tried to still my breathing. The noise was close; I figured someone was leaning against the wall, just around the corner. I doubted it was a Dark Jedi, but couldn't be certain.

With a leap, I cleared the corner and aimed my blaster directly down the corridor. A startled scream issued from a bloodied figure huddled against the wall – he scrambled backwards and slid to the ground before I recognized him.

"Gerith." I lowered my gun and stepped forward to help the Senate Ensign up. "Are you badly hurt?"

His normally clear eyes were wide with panic, and blood soaked his right side. Streaks of black burns ran up his neck; a sign I recognized as the after-effects of Force lightning. _He's lucky to be alive, _I realized grimly.

"C-carth," he mumbled, clutching my hand as he stumbled to his feet. He didn't let go of me once he stood. "Help. They-they're after me. I've-I've got to get away!"

"The exits are blocked. Gerith, get to the command room. Wann's got it sealed off – you're best chance is to wait this out," I spoke slowly, hoping my words would get through to him. Gerith had always struck me as a capable, intelligent man, but he was clerk, not a soldier. He'd probably never seen a Dark Jedi before, let alone had to fight one.

He was shaking his head at me, the whites of his eyes showing. "N-no. They'll find me. I only j-just got out."

I raise my other hand and gripped his shoulder firmly. "Gerith. Listen to me. They're not after you, they're after the Jedi. Get yourself to the command room, or find a place to hide. Do _not_ try to leave the Base, there's Dark Jedi in the entrance foyer." My guess was that at least two Dark Jedi would have been placed to guard the main doors, and resist any Selkath aid. Unless the Selkath tried blasting their way through the embassy with permacrete detonators, we were effectively pinned inside. And the Sith would search every room until they realized their quarry – Bastila – was not in residence.

A small measure of sanity seeped back into Gerith's gaze, and he nodded shakily at me. As I stepped back from him, ready to move on, I heard the noise of clambering footsteps. Men, running towards us. Gerith let out a small scream, and stumbled into me.

"Command room. Now," I ordered, hoping fervently that Wann would let the Ensign in. After all, I had told Wann to lock down the doors after me. Gerith took a step away and turned to run as I hoisted my blaster up again. The footfalls were louder, and judging by the frequency there was more than one man running towards me. I held my ground, blaster raised down the corridor as I heard Gerith retreat behind me.

Three soldiers breached the corridor up ahead, their rifles snapping to aim at me before they recognized I was no threat. I lowered my own pistol, taking in their state as they walked closer. They were the soldiers I'd spotted on the cameras, and one was limping slightly.

"Captain Onasi," their leader said tersely as they approached. I noticed captain's pips on the shoulder of his torn uniform. "We're trying to get to Wann to protect him."

"There's Dark Jedi out there!" the injured man wheezed. His comrade elbowed him sharply.

"Wann's as safe as can be," I bit out. "He's locked in the command room. I need your help to defend Jedi Karon."

"What?" the limping soldier gasped. "No sodding way! We only just made it out of there!"

"Laconi, keep your flaming voice down," the second soldier hissed, elbowing him once more. "Do you want to get us killed?"

"I saw one of your comrades kill a Dark Jedi by shooting him in the back. They aren't immortal, and our only chance is to aid Karon." I kept my voice low, intense. If I had to, I'd forge on ahead, but I'd vastly prefer a team. "She's outnumbered, and won't last long."

The captain nodded seriously at me. "I'm with you. I'm Captain Gilies, this is Privates Darna and Laconi."

"It's damn suicide!" Laconi muttered.

"Either pull yourself together or get out of here, Laconi," I ordered. I looked back at Gilies; he was waiting for my command. I quickly snapped out what I knew. "Ten Dark Jedi entered this embassy; six through the main entrance. We know at least one of them is dead. Karon went to the docking bay to cut off the other four – we need to move in that direction."

Darna, a short, stocky Sullustan, moved to flank me. Laconi scowled, but followed suit as Captain Gilies took the lead.

"This way, we'll cut through the maintenance corridor," he whispered, turning to walk briskly onwards. The rest of us followed.

Around the corner we had to step over several civilian corpses. I heard a scream not far away, and Laconi jumped in fright. I cursed under my breath. _He's not far from cracking._ I looked over at him; perspiration dripped down the human's sickly face.

"In here," Gilies whispered, opening a chrome office door. Darna stepped through first, blaster raised. As the Sullustan waved me onwards, I heard footsteps trailing nearby. My eyes met the captain's, and then trailed over Laconi. The door swept closed behind Laconi with a mechanical hiss, and I wondered how far the noise of a door shutting could be heard.

The footsteps paused, and started up again; closer.

We were in a workroom, with an exit on either end. I motioned the others to stand further back, and I pressed myself tightly against the wall by the door. _If that's a Dark Jedi, my only chance is surprise._

The footfalls stopped outside the door, and I held my breath, blaster raised at the entrance. I knew I would only get one shot – if that.

The door opened.

"Karon!" Gilies called out, and my grip slackened. The Zabrak master stepped through the entrance, and her head snapped to the side to face down my blaster. The corner of her mouth twitched in acknowledgement, and I truly wondered whether I would have got the shot off, had Karon been a Dark Jedi.

"We need to get everybody out," Karon said in a clipped tone, her gaze sweeping the room. It was then that her condition fully registered – one arm sagged at her side, and blood soaked her beige robe from the knee down. She took a step further inside the room, and only because I was looking for it did I notice the limp. _Of course she's hurt, you numbskull. She just faced down four Dark Jedi._ And there were five still out there.

"The entrance is guarded by Sith," I replied tersely. "Wann's in the command centre, with a bunch of techs and soldiers. How many Dark Jedi still out there?"

The Zabrak's gaze tightened on me. I heard a whimper from Laconi. "I dispatched three of them, and injured a fourth."

_She's some Jedi, all right. _"I saw one get killed by one of ours. That's five left, plus the injured one."

Karon was shaking her head. "Too many for me, captain. I was not far from falling myself, and I have no idea where my apprentice is. I believe our-" She stopped mid-sentence, eyes widening a fraction. "Three coming down the hallway," she whispered, spinning swiftly back to face the door. "Stand ready, they may not know we are here."

Laconi moaned, dropped his gun, and sprinted for the exit at the south of the room.

"No-!" Gilies cursed as the door swished open, and Laconi disappeared from sight.

"They do now," Karon muttered. I stood behind her to the left, gun pointing at the door. My chest felt tight with adrenalin and tension. _I'm getting too old for this._

"Get ready to fire," Gilies muttered.

I squinted at the door, readying my aim. Silence ominously pervaded the area. Karon was bathed in the pale glow of her lightsaber, holding station by the door. Gilies' and I flanked her, further behind but still with a clear shot should the door open.

My grip tightened on the weapon; Darna's breaths behind me seemed inordinately loud. _Where are those black-hearted bastards?_ A trickle of perspiration slid down my temple, and the muscles in my forearm clenched.

Gilies' shot me a tense, frantic look as the seconds ticked by. Darna shifted to the side, his weight balanced on his left foot. Only Karon seemed unaffected by the pressure of unbroken silence, standing serenely in front of us all. _Have they walked straight past us? Are we safe, or-_

A crash outside, and the door yawned wide once more.

As one, Gilies, Darna and I opened fire, a stream of bolts that was instantly deflected back into the room amidst the twirl of a red lightsaber. Karon leapt forward to attack two hooded Sith charging straight towards us.

A wave of Force power engulfed the room; the breath was smashed from my lungs as I was thrown backwards, my blaster ripped from my hands. Darna yelled in protest somewhere in the midst, and I heard Gilies thud into the wall with a grunt.

I scrabbled to my feet, spotted my gun and lunged for it as Karon stabbed her 'saber clean through the neck of the first Dark Jedi. He crumpled with a bloodcurdling scream, and the Zabrak sprung backwards, dodging the violent swing of the second Sith by an infinitesimal margin. _How does she move so flaming fast?_

Adrenalin spiked through my veins like spice; I hoisted my gun to fire into the fray as Gilies struggled back to his feet. I pulled the trigger as a third Dark Jedi entered the room, hand outstretched in an sinister gesture that was becoming all too eerily familiar.

_No-!_

Then the Force was well and truly unleashed.

Bright white scorched the room, clawing at my skin, flinging my weapon away with ease, and driving nails deep into my flesh. Muscles convulsed; agony drove all rational thought from my head. My jaw was locked open in a wordless scream.

Abruptly, it stopped, and I found myself twitching on the floor. _Stang! _I jerked my head up, taking in the scene at a glance. Karon was facing off the only standing Dark Jedi, dodging a frenzied attack that pushed her deeper into the room. A second dark-robed figure was dragging himself to his feet- _Dammit, there's still two left!_

My skin was burning from lightning residue as I dragged myself up, limbs tight and aching. Frantically, I searched for my blaster; tables and containers alike had been overturned, leaving an assorted mess of tools, implements and objects lying scattered. The only weapon I could spot was what looked like a nail gun, perched underneath an overturned canister.

Karon lurched unsteadily backwards, off-balance and on the defensive. Red met cyan again and again.

Darna was moaning softly, the odd blue spark still shooting brightly from his body. I dived for the nail gun as the second Sith turned to face me, a dark chuckle warning of his impending approach.

_Nothing for it._ I snatched the gun and rolled, aiming and firing blindly, the tool bucking desperately in my grasp. The first nail hissed as it melted on a red beam, before an invisible force wrenched the gun from my hand.

A berserker scream sounded from my left; the Dark Jedi whirled quickly to face a surprise attack from Gilies with a stun stick. I couldn't stop a wince as a red beam cleaved the captain's head from his body. _Murdering bastards! There's got to be a way to kill them! _The Dark Jedi faced me yet again; defenceless, weaponless, I stood stock still as he loosed another mocking laugh.

Darna, crouched in a corner, opened fire and snatched his attention away yet again. I leapt towards Gilies' still thrashing body and grabbed the useless stun stick. _Who am I kidding? This, against a Dark Jedi? _

Darna gurgled as the bolts were deflected back into his torso; the offender was still laughing, his back to me. I glanced down at the stun stick, grimaced, and threw.

It landed with a solid thud into his back.

Triumph was short-lived. As his legs buckled, I glanced back towards Karon. She had fallen to her knees in front of the sole remaining Dark Jedi. _No! Sithspit, I have to help her!_

The hooded figure raised a hand, and Karon's lightsaber flew effortlessly out of her grip. I was completely out of weapons; my fists clenched, I'd fight bare-handed, if need be. The Dark Jedi wasn't looking in my direction; so far, my survival hadn't been noticed amongst their wild duel.

"Well, well," the Dark Jedi gave out a low chuckle, and took a step closer to Karon. "And here I thought the Force user we sensed was Bastila. I guess it figures you'd be here. Babysitting your failure, are you?"

That made no sense to me, but considering the way Karon's face tightened, it struck a nerve with her.

"Kylah," she said softly. "I would like to offer my happiness at seeing you alive when we all believed you died upon the Endar Spire – but, considering your apparel, I do not believe your survival was chance."

Horror punched into my gut, followed swiftly by boiling fury as I looked upon the face of the Dark Jedi. Even shadowed underneath a hood, I could recognize her, now I looked hard enough. One of Bastila's entourage onboard the doomed Endar Spire, who'd had the distinct ability to stick her nose even higher in the air than Bastila herself.

"Traitor," the word slipped out in a hiss before I could think. "You backstabbing gutter slime! You sold out to Malak and betrayed hundreds to their deaths!"

Kylah's attention snapped to me, her hand punched into the air and I felt my body lift violently. The breath was smashed from my lungs as I smacked into the far wall. Pain shot down my spine, and stars danced in my vision. Joints seemed to creak in anguished complaint.

_Well, that was bright. _I'd crashed into the far side of the room, next to the still warm body of Private Darna. His blaster was still clutched in his dead hand.

"So, where's little Bastila then, hrm?" Kylah had focused her attention back on Karon; obviously I was far beneath her notice. _I might be able to use that to my advantage. Get her, when she's not expecting it. _Survival instinct warred with exhaustion as lethargy swept through my limbs.

"You're after Bastila," Karon responded quietly. It wasn't a query, but from the stiff set of her shoulders I didn't think she'd been expecting that. _Who else would they be after?_

Kylah laughed deep in her throat. "What, you thought I was tracking your wayward apprentice?" A dark look passed her face. "We all have our missions, _Master_ Karon."

Karon mentioned her young apprentice had disappeared earlier. _But why would Kylah be after Lars? That doesn't make any sense._ I edged my hand surreptitiously towards the blaster on the ground. Kylah had all but forgotten me.

"Now tell me," Kylah's voice dropped lower, and she took a step closer to the unarmed Zabrak. Karon was still on her knees. "Where is Bastila?"

The gun was too far away; I shifted my torso closer, holding my breath. Agony twisted through my back, and I knew I'd be a bruised mess tomorrow. _Tomorrow? Hah, I'll be stars lucky if I live through today. _My palm brushed the cold arm of Private Darna.

"You will not find her, Kylah." Karon's voice was soft.

An ugly sneer contorted the Dark Jedi's face, and she raised her lightsaber towards Karon. "I will kill you, Karon, don't make the mistake of thinking I'd spare your pathetic life. Tell me where she is!" The blood red of the 'saber flickered against Karon's dark skin.

My fingers caught on the metal of Darna's blaster as Karon jerked abruptly backwards, rolling to the side with her hand outstretched. I tugged at the gun, wrenching it up to aim. Kylah yelled in outrage and lunged; Karon's 'saber thudded into her hands a moment too late. As my blaster spat laser, Kylah's weapon drove deep into the Zabrak's side.

Karon gave an agonized wail as she crumpled to the floor.

My shot seared into Kylah's shoulder; she screamed and spun to face me, flinging aside Darna's blaster in fury. Dark rage deformed her features, and with a sick punch to my gut, I knew this was it.

_Karon's dead, or as near as. And so am I. _I'd had so many close calls recently, that part of me was almost resigned to this.

"Worm!" Kylah hissed. "You just don't know when to stay dead, do you?" She raised a fist once more, and I was dragged up against the bloodied wall, a band tightening around my throat. A fresh wave of panic struck blindly through me. _No! I'm not ready to die, dammit! _ My hands scrabbled at my throat uselessly, and my vision dimmed.

The last thing I could make out was the bright sparks of electricity dancing from Kylah's free hand.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_I'm pleasantly surprised that there are still readers out there after this long wait! Thank you for the reviews._

_**Dark Lord Daishi: **Good ole HK! Glad you liked.  
**Serpent King: **To be honest, I wasn't sure if I would either.  
**Misarashi Tsukamaru: **Thanks, I've enjoyed trying to get into the heads of all the characters. Hope you keep enjoying.  
**Nikeon: **High praise indeed – thanks!  
**Datakim: **not a year this time! Hee hee.  
**Usethefork: **You're welcome!  
**Judah: **Will try my best._

_Also thanks to all the reviews I've had over my absence, in particular NZL82 for the long constructive reviews and encouragement. And, of course, to everyone who reviewed chapter 38 all that long, long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away). Also thanks for Curtis for the prodding to finally get writing again._

_Next chapter might take a little while to upload, but don't worry - it shouldn't take one and a half years. _


	41. The horror unfolds

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Forty-one – The horror unfolds**

_- Bastila Shan -_

* * *

Everything was falling apart. We were trapped on the bottom of the ocean, in a deserted base, with no vehicle back to safety. And no communication link back to Karon. 

If that wasn't bad enough, my worry for Juhani was beginning to supersede everything else. The intense Cathar had been strangely quiet, but I hadn't failed to sense her burgeoning fear. Perhaps because my link with Revan was muted – _small mercies, at least there is some peace_ – but I had realized all was far from well with Juhani. The Cathar insisted she was fine, but the tense set of her shoulders and the feral look in her eyes betrayed her.

And now we only had each other to rely upon. In the past, I had wished for that barbaric Mandalorian to leave – to allow me to continue my quest without his interference and snide temperament – but not like this. I could not quite forget the ugly look in his eyes.

_Why did Canderous have to be so stiff-necked? _His death-threats did not strike fear into me – I refused to let anything that uncouth simpleton said scare me – but I could not help but be cautious. Canderous was no match for the Force, but should he catch me unawares...

I pursed my lips in annoyance. If it hadn't been for Roland Wann and his self-righteous interference, Carth would be accompanying us. While I trusted in the Force and my own abilities, the rabid Selkath set my teeth on edge. We had been lucky so far, and had not encountered more than two of them together. But the cursed Base had been grotesque in its offerings – the last Selkath looked to have been feeding on a corpse when we interrupted him. Juhani had barely dodged a vicious bite to her leg.

"I wonder what could have occurred to warp these Selkath." Juhani's voice was jarringly loud as we picked our way through one of the endless meeting rooms that populated this part of the Base. The darkened chambers were now behind us, but the artificial light emitting from halogen bulbs cast an eerie glow over the plasteel walls.

Silence had enveloped us as we tentatively strode through the cursed Base. An hour earlier I hadn't been able to ignore the faint, muted sounds that occasionally reached our ears – sounding suspiciously like human screams – but now, nothing. I was not sure what was worse.

"I do not believe I wish to know," I finally replied. "These Selkath do not feel right." They had been the only sentients we had encountered in the last hour. And their demeanour has been so crazed that I could not categorically call them sentient anymore.

The Force shone in all living beings, brighter in the more conscious ones. Somehow, it had been dulled, or twisted, in Selkath we had found. The only thing I could compare it to was a rabid kath hound.

"They do not smell right either," Juhani muttered under her breath. "Like a caged reek."

The incoherent, raving Selkath had dogged us through the twisted channels of the underwater base, and revulsion sat like sick in my stomach. _They used to be researchers here. Logical sane people that have been contorted into something macabre. _What could have happened to degenerate them so?

We exited into a hall that was dominated by a large, round table. Datapads and techJournals sprinkled the floor in a disjointed mosaic. _Days ago, scientists met here to discuss their findings and research projects._ A vast ferracrystal window gave us a view into the gloomy depths of the Manaan ocean. The water was too dark to make anything out, although I thought I caught a glimpse of a slithering shadow in the murky depths.

Juhani shuddered and moved on.

"You are safe inside, Juhani. The water cannot come in."

"I know," the Cathar replied tartly. "I am well aware that it is an irrational fear, and I apologize for it. But I can – no, I _will_ deal with it. In silence."

She stepped past me after that pointed remark, and did not look in my direction. I held in a sigh and followed her. _I should not have brought that up, _I rebuked myself. _Surely reminding Juhani of her own fear achieves nothing. _But I wanted to help her, and I needed her strong.

I silently followed her into one of the long corridors that sprawled like treekan tentacles throughout the base. Walls loomed on either side, closeting us in this claustrophobic place. I had never been so anxious to see blue sky again.

Our objective was to discover a working transmitter or console, but thus far we had been unlucky. The only computers we had found were either malfunctioning, or had been maliciously destroyed.

The corridor curved gently to the right, and the lights above flickered intermittently. Panels from the ceiling had fallen to leave rubble in our path, but beyond that I could make out a larger room. The door had been smashed open, and pale electronic light shimmered from within. Juhani straightened her shoulders, and stepped over the rubble on the floor.

As the Cathar strode into the room – a command centre of some sort, I could see that now – I noted a faint whirring noise. _What is that? _The Cathar froze, and my mind raced. I'd heard that sound before, but couldn't place it.

A blast of bright laser fire spat back at us, aiming directly for Juhani. I gasped, instinctively reaching forward to pull her to safety, but the Cathar was quick enough. I sensed a vague hum of the Force swirl inside her as she leaped backwards, falling onto the broken ceiling tiles and scrambling back over them. Her wild eyes met mine.

"Turrets," I muttered, edging away from the room. "They must be malfunctioning."

"Why?" Juhani gasped.

"I am not sure," I returned, but my eyes were on the room. _I can destroy the turrets, but it may take out the computers also. Is it a better choice than turning around? _We had to find a working console to request help, but moving onwards was even more important. We would achieve nothing if we kept backtracking at every obstacle.

"No, no, you misunderstand me. Why would a research base be armed with turrets?"

I looked back at Juhani; she was frowning in thought. "As a defence against the Sith, I imagine. Should they ever find out about this secret base, they would stop at nothing to destroy it. My first thought upon hearing about the problems down here was that the Sith were somehow involved. Now, I am not so sure."

"You believe they would risk the neutrality agreement to attack here?" Juhani inquired.

"I do not think they would be jeopardizing it. This place is secret – even from some members of the Selkath government. The Sith could attack here and the Republic could not afford to cast the blame upon them – not without revealing their operations. The political ramifications of that could cost _us_ the kolto agreement, rather than the Sith."

Juhani had turned to face the room again, her body tense. Her ears lay flat against her head. I laid my hand on her arm to forestall her.

"Let me disable the turrets," I murmured. She nodded, and I gathered the Force inside me. The life energy inundated through my veins and settled my nerves – some part of me understood just how addictive the Force could become. I closed my eyes and reached out my senses, feeling for the electrical impulses in the room beyond. It buzzed with the artificial energy of working machinery, and I knew a moment's regret about the computers I was about to destroy. Though surely we would find more deeper in the base – we had to.

I stepped forward, flat against the north wall and out of line from the working turret. Why it was activated I did not know; I preferred to believe it was malfunctioning. The other reason – that someone had set it to fire at anything that moved – raised too many questions. I only knew of two beings alive in the base, and that hysterical Twi'lek we encountered earlier was in no frame of mind to be turning on defence systems. I did not want to consider that the Mandalorian might be angry enough to impede our progress – or worse, to actively attempt to kill us.

I stretched out my hand, letting forth a flood of Force power that streamed towards the electrical oscillations. Loud pops and bangs of systems shorting out issued from the room, and bright sparks danced against my eyelids. I let the flow continue for a moment longer and then stopped, panting slightly against the wall. While I was proficient at this use of the Force, it _was_ tiring.

I opened my eyes to Juhani staring at me quizzically. "You transform the Force differently than I, more efficiently. That looked very similar to what Revan used against me, back on Tatooine."

I stiffened, indignation spiking hot in my belly. _Lightning – that is an abomination. Used to torture and kill_. "It is not the same," I said tartly, aware that my voice had turned stiff and insulted. "This use of the Force affects only electronic equipment, such as droids or computer systems. It is _nothing_ like lightning."

"I am sorry." Juhani looked taken aback. "I did not mean to offend you."

I realized I was glaring, and hurriedly schooled my features. _Why am I so upset?_ Revan had once been one of the most powerful Jedi around. I sighed. _Comparing my abilities to hers should not be distasteful. _It was the way she had used her powers that made them so odious. _Revan is certainly a touchy subject for me these days._

"And I should not be so quick to snap," I apologized. "Master Zhar once told me that this use of the Force was a close cousin to the lightning many Dark Jedi employ. Perhaps I am more like Revan than I care to admit."

Juhani smiled at me in understanding, and her face filled with warmth.

We cautiously edged into the room again. Sparks shot from the turret mechanism up on the ceiling as it hung limply by a cable. Four consoles in the centre of the room showed nothing but static.

My shoulders drooped as Juhani laid a comforting hand on my arm.

"We will press on," she whispered. "There must be some system – or person – left on this base that can help us."

I nodded at the Cathar; she appeared steadier, calmer than she had been. _Perhaps we both benefit from reassuring the other. _With that thought, I followed her silently out into yet another corridor.

As we left the doomed command centre behind, a clattering noise reached my ears. I tensed, and once more activated my lightsaber. The corridor turned sharply to the right some twenty metres ahead, and beyond that came the sounds of incoherent muttering. We froze, as into sight loped the crazed Twi'lek Canderous had scared away earlier.

"You!" he garbled, breaking into a run. A hiss next to me indicated Juhani's lightsaber; with a wary eye I spotted a blade in the flailing hand of the panicked Twi'lek.

"I want your ship! Give it to me!" His hand waved uncontrollably; his eyes were wide and dilated. Part of me marvelled that he had survived these last few hours – he was lucky to have avoided that bloodthirsty Mandalorian.

"Please, calm down," I said slowly, carefully. "We can help you, but-"

"No! I'll kill you if you stand in my way!" Saliva dripped from his open mouth.

"Bastila, let him past," Juhani whispered.

"Our ship is damaged," I spoke slowly, struggling to keep my voice low and non-threatening. "You must listen to reason-"

"I'm not afraid of you!" he shrieked, his fingers clenching on the blade.

"Let him past, Bastila!" Juhani's voice was intense. "Let him to our ship."

Surprise at the Cathar was what made me stand down; at the very second I stepped aside, the crazed Twi'lek was past us at a scream, almost cackling in glee.

"Juhani!" I hissed. "The hull of the submersible is cracked – allowing him through has condemned him to certain death!" Stunned disbelief choked me; that the Cathar would allow such an unbalanced person to their demise was not what I expected.

"He would have attacked us otherwise, and died in the effort," she replied, her yellow eyes fierce and gleaming. Faint footfalls of the Twi'lek scampering away lessened, and ceased.

"No, you cannot know that!" I protested. "We should have tried-"

"We did, earlier," she countered. "You sensed his mind – he was as far gone as the Selkath, and you have not managed to get through to any of them, either."

Defeat sat heavy in me; the Cathar was right. I had tried to communicate with all the Selkath we encountered. Nothing but insane war cries had met my desperate pleas.

"Besides," a half smile sat oddly on Juhani's face. "He does not have the access codes to start the submersible."

I felt my mouth drop open as chagrin overwhelmed my sense of despair. Juhani was smiling openly now, not mocking, but merely conveying reassurance. I could feel my cheeks flushing in embarrassment. _I detest it when I miss the obvious. _Juhani turned to stare intently down the corridor, the warm expression sliding from her face.

"This place is a rotting cess-pit of evil," Juhani muttered, switching off her lightsaber and hooking it to her belt. "Bastila, not everyone can be saved. And some- some must find their own path to salvation."

I knew she was no longer talking of the Twi'lek. My thoughts shied away from Revan automatically, but I could not quite still a smile at Juhani's words.

"And who taught you the wisdom of a Master?" I asked, a lilt in my voice.

Juhani smiled back, and assumed walking once more. "I had a good talk with Karon."

We stayed quiet after that, walking silently down the eerily empty tunnels. Speaking with Karon had been a balm to my soul; but down here in the bowels of the ocean, I was no longer at peace. Tension returned to Juhani as we moved further; the Cathar's movements became abrupt, jerky. Occasionally we could hear creaks as the base groaned under the weight of all the water. I could only hope that Juhani was not dwelling on it also.

"I would like to know more about these Star Maps," the Cathar's voice broke the ominous silence; I recognized she wished more for a distraction than an explanation. I, for once, appreciated the chance to share what had been my mission alone for so long. Juhani was a sister Jedi; perhaps returned recently to the fold, but I felt I could trust her.

"Karon explained the majority of what we already knew," I began. "The Star Maps are relics of an ancient civilization – but more importantly, we believe they point towards some sort of powerful weapon. A weapon that Revan and Malak discovered."

Juhani nodded. She had heard this before from Karon, less than a day ago. "There are four maps, yes?"

"Five if you include the one on Dantooine – the starting point. The Council found that it contained the coordinates to the four others." I paused, wondering how to phrase the rest. "I- I shared some of Revan's memories before her mind was rebuilt. One of which was her and Malak entering the tomb on Dantooine. That is how the Order found out about the Star Maps."

Juhani lapsed into silence, and I wondered what she was thinking. We walked cautiously through an empty storage room; I grimaced at the sight of two Selkath corpses lying broken on the ground. Splintered metal fragments lay next to lockers that had been blown wide open. Scorch marks and grainy residue marked the ground, suggesting evidence of a grenade blast. _Could this be the Mandalorian's doing? _It seemed likely, although I dearly hoped I would not encounter Canderous again.

Juhani's voice cut through the dead air. "Do you not think the others deserve to know about our mission?"

I could not help a bitter laugh. "What others? Juhani, in case you haven't noticed, our team has disintegrated. Mission and Zaalbar have disappeared; Canderous has deserted us. Carth is the only one to remain loyal, and he is not even here!"

Juhani did not reply as she opened the exit at the south of the room. Another vast hallway greeted us, this one splitting nearby into two closed doors. A sign dominated the wall next to us.

"It seems we have a choice," Juhani murmured, her eyes skipping over the sign. "Research Administration or the Experimental Laboratory."

"Let's try the former. Perhaps we can find a working console there," I suggested.

Juhani nodded, and stalked to the door. A camera mounted on the ceiling shifted to track her movements, and I froze in readiness, glancing around quickly for turrets. I could not spot any defence weaponry in sight.

"It will not open," Juhani said, palm pressed on the door control. "Either the door has been locked, or the electronics are damaged."

My eyes stayed fixed on the camera as I walked slowly next to Juhani. It moved slightly to point at me.

"Juhani," I said softly. "I think that camera is tracking us."

Juhani twitched, shooting me a look of surprise before affixing her gaze on the ceiling. She frowned, and raised a hand, palm open, in the universal gesture for peace.

A faint noise permeated through solid ferracrete; I could not make it out, and Juhani shook her head in irritation.

"Hello?" I called out. "Is someone there?"

"Survivors?" Juhani murmured, her eyes lighting. Nothing but silence answered our call.

I knocked loudly on the large door. "We are part of a Republic rescue team! Can you hear me?"

"Go away!" a muffled voice reverberated through the thick ferracrete. "You'll let the Selkath in! They'll get us like they got all the others!"

Juhani's face was solemn as she laid a palm on the door. "There are none out here," the Cathar cried out. "You can see from your camera – there is but us two!"

"We will not hurt you!" I added, knocking again on the door. "Roland Wann sent us!"

The vague sounds of a stifled argument filtered through – _there is more than one survivor then. _I could not quite perceive what they were saying.

"We are here to help!" I appealed again. "Please, we will not harm you!"

Voices were raised once more in debate before I heard an answering call. "Okay- I'll unlock the door, but you have to come in quickly!"

The door swished open as I sighed in relief. Two humans stood back from the entrance, staring at us, faces fraught with distress. The younger female was pointing a gun directly at me.

"Quick!" the elder, a male, said frantically, waving his hands. "Before the Selkath come!"

I had barely taken a step inside the room before the door snapped closed behind us.

"Who are you?" the woman cried, her eyes wide. The gun – a small blaster – wavered in her trembling grip.

"Sami, calm down," the man murmured, raising a placating hand to rest on her arm. "I don't think they're here to kill us." The woman lowered the gun at his words, her shoulders sagging in fear and exhaustion. She muffled a sob, and I felt a surge of pity at what these poor people had gone through.

"My name is Bastila Shan, and this is Juhani," I introduced. "Roland Wann sent us to rescue any survivors."

"I am Kono Nolan," the male responded, but his head had jerked to face me at my introduction. "This is Sami Touraide. I- are you Jedi?" His eyes had wandered over us, and were resting on the deactivated lightsaber in my grasp. "Did you say _Bastila Shan?_"

"Jedi?" the one called Sami murmured. Something that resembled hope lifted the weariness from her features.

I was surprised Kono recognized my name, though perhaps I should not have been. It seemed like years since I had been actively involved in the war, utilizing my prized Battle Meditation for the good of the Republic. Any person, be they scientist or merchant or clerk, would have heard my name if they followed the holofeed headlines. _It was easier then, knowing where the enemy was, and what I needed to do to help our allies. Better than this sneaking about from planet to planet, unable to consult with the masters and not knowing who to trust._

"Do you have a way out of here?" Sami demanded. She'd put her gun aside on a table, and took an expectant step towards us.

"Bastila Shan," Kono muttered disbelievingly under his breath, staring at me the faintest glimpse of awe in his eyes. I shifted uncomfortably.

"Unfortunately, our submersible was damaged on the trip down here," Juhani replied. "We will have to look for another way out."

Sami was shaking her head as the hope fled from her face. "So you have no way of getting out of this pit either? Some rescue!"

"Sami!" Kono reprimanded her sharply, shooting me an apologetic look.

I pursed my lips, biting back indignation at the scowling woman. "Perhaps, rather than recriminations, you can tell us what happened and we can go from there."

Sami glowered at me, but Kono was nodding in agreement. "It was... almost a week ago, now. Our work teams were outside in the rift near the vent. This... this _monster-_"

"Firaxan shark," Sami interrupted, her eyes flashing.

"Larger than any shark I've ever seen!" Kono shot back incredulously. Juhani looked at them in askance; this sounded like the echo of an argument run ragged in the past.

"Kono, I know what I'm talking about-"

"What did this shark do?" Juhani interrupted in a steely voice. The two humans quietened, and Sami closed her eyes in despair.

"Our people outside- they, they were torn to shreds," Kono answered finally, his voice low and quiet. "This shark or whatever it was– and I've never seen a creature so large– seemed to lead an attack. Swarms of firaxan followed it, our cannon defences were useless..." he trailed off, and I was appallingly reminded of the presence I had felt when approaching the Station. _Some vast entity slammed into my Force walls and disintegrated them, _I recalled with horror. _Something that rekindled the frenzy of the firaxan swarm attacking us. Could it have been this monster they are talking about?_

"Then our Selkath researchers went mad," Sami continued. She was looking away from us, vacant gaze fixed on the wall behind. "They started screaming... and clawing at everything around them."

"We barely made in here alive," Kono added. He swallowed. "Sami and me... I... I thought we were the only ones left. We heard the Selkath outside at the doors every once in a while... and those strange noises echoing through the base. We... thought everyone was dead... dead or insane. All we could see was the cameras... and we saw the Selkath slaughter everyone..."

A portentous silence pervaded the room; Juhani was looking down, a painful grimace twisting her mouth. Unease swept through me, heavier than before. _I must find a way forward. _Trust in the Force, Karon had told me. I struggled to take the words to heart.

"Can you contact the Republic from in here?" I asked quietly. "That must be our first objective. We need to let them know there are people alive down here-"

Sami snorted, and I halted my discourse to frown at her. "It's not like they'd send another rescue team – the firaxans are attacking any vehicle that approaches the base!"

Annoyance wound its way through me; I could understand that they had experienced a horrific time, but the woman so far seemed to be objecting at every turn. "Regardless," I went on smoothly. "We need to communicate with them. Is it possible?"

Kono was shaking his head. "No, not yet. Our communications array went down days ago. We don't know how – either the Selkath or those blasted malfunctioning turrets. Something happened, and caused the security systems to kick in and seal the room shut. I can't connect to the mainframes from here, so I have to assume the damage is irreparable."

I could feel myself frowning in thought. "You said not yet," I replied slowly. "Do you believe there is a way, then?"

The older scientist hesitated, and then nodded slowly. "The systems in this room were used for communicating to our workers outside. Each envirosuit is kitted with a small transmitter, so from here we can keep track of our mining teams. Our computers aren't equipped for long-range communication, but I've been trying to strengthen the signal using the amplification units from our spare envirosuits. If I can run it through enough amplification stages without too much signal degradation, it might just be strong enough to reach the surface." Kono shrugged. "It's a long shot, and it's been slow going, but we haven't had many other options."

I had a good look around then – I had not paid much attention to our environment since Kono and Sami had so grudgingly granted us entrance. We were in what looked like a research station – terminals lined two walls, yielding what appeared to be scientific data on most of them. A full circle of even more consoles dominated the lower end of the room, and multiple camera outputs illustrated their screens. I could see that the two humans had been able to track parts of the Base while staying safely locked inside this haven. Desks and benches laden with equipment I did not recognize furnished the north end of the room, underneath a wide window that showed a dark portal to the world outside.

"Well that is good news," Juhani said after we paused to digest it. "If you believe we can eventually contact Commander Wann-"

"We've got a bigger problem," Sami cut in, looking intently at the both of us. "The air conditioning's not working."

I stared at her. "What?" I spluttered in disbelief.

"The air con's not working," she repeated indignantly. "The firaxans have attacked parts of the base, and we believe that's what caused a leak in the pipes leading from the air turbines. The immediate countermeasure by the control cluster was to shut the pipes down, causing the air circulation process to feed back on itself."

There was a heavy pause. "What, exactly, does that mean?" Juhani enquired in a tiny voice.

Sami sighed. "In short, the air's not replenishing."

I froze, and heard Juhani moan beside me. Sami, however, did not look so alarmed. Perhaps she'd had days to come to terms with the ghastly knowledge of her impending suffocation. "Now this base is pretty big, I'd say we've lots of air left – but I just don't see the Republic sending another rescue vehicle when the last three haven't made it back. We've gotta sort out the firaxan problem ourselves first, otherwise even if they do send another ship – it's not going to make it down here intact," the words tumbled in a rush from Sami, and she finished by inhaling deep and folding her arms defensively.

"We're running out of air?" Juhani whispered, her eyes widening. I felt a churning in my stomach, and swallowed despite myself.

"We might have weeks left," Kono amended. "I'll only need a day or so and I should be able to send a delayed message through. The Republic will send another rescue team – they _must_-"

Sami snorted, and despite myself I was almost inclined to agree with her. "Kono, we've seen three submersibles arrive since this happened. We've tracked them on the cameras. _All_ of them were assaulted by the sharks – one didn't even make it inside! It'd be suicide for them to send any more-"

"You think they'd leave us to die?" Kono shot back heatedly. "You really think the-"

"What _can_ we do about the sharks?" Juhani intervened.

Sami fixed her gaze on the Cathar. "We've powered down most of our harvesting machines. _I_ believe that-"

"What's that?" I cut in, my attention caught sharply by a blur of activity on the screen directly in front of Kono. In the periphery of my vision I vaguely noticed Sami shoot me an irritated frown, but I was more focussed on what looked like the onset of a fight. Kono and Juhani turned to study the console as I walked forward. I heard the Cathar gasp.

"It's more psychotic Selkath," Kono muttered. "Most are dead now – they even turn on each other – but there's still some stragglers around."

"Where is that room?" Juhani's voice had a note of distress. I looked closer, and with mounting horror recognized the bulky figure standing in the centre of the room: Canderous Ordo.

"It's our chemical storage room – just down the hallway from here actually," Kono replied.

I couldn't hold back a gasp of terror; my stomach clenched and my veins turned to ice as I processed the video starkly playing out in front of me. Bile churned in my stomach.

I could make out perhaps seven Selkath, charging at him in unison. The Mandalorian fired point blank into the chest of one, but two others leapt onto his back. Revulsion flooded me as I saw one of the crazed Selkath sink his teeth deep into Canderous' neck. _He's going to die in there!_ The Mandalorian arched in pain, but retaliated by slamming his elbow into the stomach of the Selkath.

"We must help him," I whispered, realizing at once that for all I disliked the callous barbarian - I did not wish him to die. Juhani swivelled to stare at me in surprise.

"We can't!" Kono objected. "We're safe in here – the Selkath attack anything that moves!"

One of them had wrested the Mandalorian's blaster from his grip; another had taken a frantic swipe at his legs. Canderous twisted as he fell to the ground, fists snapping out in a wild attempt to fight back. The Selkath with his gun turned to fire, stumbling backwards as the repeating blaster coughed laser chaotically through the room.

"Open the door!" I demanded urgently. Without consciously realizing, the Force had swirled and interleaved through my verbal command. Kono stepped backwards, a dazed look on his face. "Open it, now!"

Sami's mouth dropped, her hand snapped towards the console and I heard the door swish open. At once, I ran for it, harnessing the Force to lend me speed.

"Bastila-!" Juhani cried from behind. I paid her no mind, sprinting through the corridor. The walls blurred past as I ran, pausing only to slam my hand on the door control at the end.

The entrance opened, and a horrific sight met my eyes. Selkath corpses garnished the large room, but at least four were a writhing pile in the centre. I could not even make out the Mandalorian – it looked like a feeding frenzy. Feral shrieks and cries mingled with brutish Mandalorian howls – _he was still alive._

An upsurge of Force power erupted from me, rippling through the room and thrusting the Selkath off Canderous, like petals plucked by a sharp winter's breeze. My lightsaber glowed yellow in my hands; with a sharp cry I ran forwards, cutting down the first Selkath in my path. It hissed as it seared into blue-green flesh.

The Selkath howled in anguish, and two others scrabbled up to face me, leaping rabidly at me, snarling, hands outstretched in a frantic bid for my face. _They are crazy! _My lightsaber whirled in desperation, searing a limb off as warm blood spattered on my face, stabbing deep into a belly as I dodged the swipe of a claw. I could hear Canderous grunting as he struggled to remove himself from the fray; the thrumming noise of his blaster-

_Wait, he was not holding his weapon!_

Sharp pain blossomed in my lower back, and I screamed convulsively as my legs caved underneath me, my lightsaber slicing through a Selkath leg as I lost my footing-

There was a roaring noise in my ears as the agony overrode everything else; daggers of fierce torment biting deep into vertebrae-

"Bastila?" Canderous yelled, his voice shocked and incensed. I'd fallen on my front, my lightsaber slipping from my grasp. Alien growls dimmed under the torrent of pain as a heavy, snarling weight landed on my back – _another Selkath_, a dim part of me realized, as I sunk helplessly into black oblivion.

xXx

A flaring of agony in my back brought me to jarring consciousness; my eyes stayed tightly closed as I struggled to contain my breathing. Painful warmth throbbed at my side and tailbone, overshadowing a murmured conversation I barely registered.

"I told you! There are no working submersibles left. Each one that fled the base was smashed to bits by the sharks – I don't see any way out of here other than to hope for a rescue team." The voice was desperate; it sounded like the scientist.

"Yeah, and we all know how successful _that's_ been," a gravely voice fired back.

"Bastila? Are you awake?" a quiet murmur by my ear; I felt a faint pressure on my hand.

**_Bastila? _**The query rippled faintly through my mind. I shied away in reflex.

"Or we could manually disable the last harvesting machine. No, Kono, listen to me! We have no choice-"

"You wanna go for a swim out there? What, you think the sharks haven't been fed enough?" That was definitely Canderous, his deep voice mocking and sarcastic.

With effort, I pried open my eyelids. Harsh light blinded me and I gasped, squeezing my eyes shut involuntarily. The pain stabbed deeper in my back.

**_We need to talk. Are you there? _**The voice was dimmer now, so quiet I barely registered it.

"He's right, Sami. We don't stand a chance out there!"

"Bastila, can you hear me?"

Dizzying nausea pulsated through my senses, and with something akin to gratitude I let unconsciousness claim me once more.

xXx

Angry, raised voices pervaded my oblivion, but this time, awareness was quicker to emerge.

"I ain't putting my life on the line for a pair of cowardly academics!"

"I'm needed here! I cannot afford to leave this room!"

The breath expelled from my lungs as my eyes opened. Blurry colours morphed into people; Canderous was sneering at Kono Nolan, whose face was red with indignant fury. _The Mandalorian has stayed, then. _Unease crawled through me.

"Canderous, this is our mission! One of us must brave outside, and I- I don't..." Juhani's voice trailed off, and her head bowed in what I guessed was shame.

"I'll go," a young female voice spoke out firmly.

"No, Sami, I need you here!"

"What's going on?" I intended my voice to be firm; that the same argument was still raging seemed ludicrous. However, what emitted was a weak croak that transformed into a choke. My back flared with heat.

"Bastila," Juhani's face lit up as she turned to me, a smile curving her lips. Concerned relief warmed her voice.

"Welcome back, princess." The Mandalorian's tone was harder to pick.

I was lying on a bench at the end of Kono's command room. The smell of kolto and bacta patches overpowered anything else, but I took a moment to realize my wounds weren't as uncomfortable as they had been before.

Juhani moved closer, crouching next to me. "Sami's patched you up. I do not think you will walk for a few days, but with luck there should be no lasting damage. You will need a proper scan when we get to the surface to make sure. I tried... I tried to heal you. I am afraid it has been too long... since..."

"Peace, Juhani," the words slipped out, cutting softly through her diatribe. I had no wish to hear Juhani doubt herself again. "It will come with time."

Canderous had stalked towards the bench, stopping to stare down at me. "It's not the first time you've saved my neck, princess." His eyes were unreadable; cold slats of grey. A bloodied rag was tied tightly around his neck, and his face lacked the ruddy colour it normally held. "This time, you had no reason to. We'll talk about Jen later - but Mandalorians honour their debts. I'll get you to the surface."

I nodded slowly at him, not trusting myself to respond.

"We won't get to the surface unless we power off the harvesting machine!" Sami burst out angrily.

"What harvesting machine?" I cut in. I felt exhausted, and my legs prickled with fatigue. I was straining just to follow the heated argument, wrestling against eyelids that were determined to close.

Kono and his assistant had moved towards me also; they glanced at each other briefly before Kono's gaze returned to me. He smiled, but lines of tension cut deeply into his weathered face.

Sami was studying me appraisingly. "That was pretty brave what you did," she said, in a musing tone. Indignation flooded me – I knew she had not liked me on sight, but _any_ proper Jedi would not sit back while someone else was in danger!

"We didn't have a chance to talk properly before," she added before I could open my mouth to object. She dropped into a worn chair opposite me. "I'm a deep ocean biologist; I was sent to this base to investigate the recent upsurge of firaxan activity in these waters."

"Now, the sharks have _always_ been a problem," Kono interrupted in a pious tone. "We use sonic blasters and projectile cannons as a defence, but they still got some of our workers from time to time."

Sami threw a brief frown at her boss. "Yes, but only when our workers ventured past the safety markers! Firaxan sharks usually stay in their territory, and attack only when provoked. Since we discovered the new kolto vent, and subsequently opened our new harvesting machine, there has been a marked alteration in their behaviour. I've never seen oceanic animals attack _machinery_ without provocation, yet this is precisely what they've been doing. Almost as if they believe our operations are a threat to their way of life, or an impingement on their territory-"

"Sami, you talk like these beasts are intelligent," Kono scoffed. "They're rabid sharks! To be respected, like any other predator, but-"

"They're a pack animal, Kono!" Sami was scowling at him in anger. Canderous rolled his eyes, leaning against the wall with a contemptuous look fixed firmly on his face. "Just like kath hounds, they _will_ attack something collectively if they've a reason to!"

"Perhaps you had best explain where the harvesting machine ties in," Juhani broke in softly as Kono's mouth opened once more.

The scientist huffed in frustration. "We've powered down all bar one of our harvesting machines, and yes, the sharks have mostly dispersed from our older kolto mines. Now they've all swarmed to the new mine, just past the docking bay."

"They can't power it off remotely," Canderous cut in, his voice disgusted. "Seems the little fishies have damaged it somehow. Someone's gotta get out there and flick the switch."

I must have shown my incredulity, for Sami intervened quickly. "It's not as crazy as it sounds! We've been working on ways to repel the sharks – poison, cannons – but our most successful experiments have been using sonics. Caal Jordan's created a handheld sonic emitter that so far has aided all our workers immensely-"

"Have you looked outside lately and seen that swarm?" Canderous growled. "Ain't no way some fancy little gun is gonna kill off that lot-"

"It's not a gun." Sami's dark eyes flashed. "It'll scare away the sharks – if they're close enough, it'll stun them-"

"Do we have any other options?" I intervened, flaring with irritation at the lot of them.

Silence hung in the air, and Kono sighed heavily. "I'm a few hours away from contacting HQ."

"However, if they cannot safely send another vehicle, then we are effectively trapped here regardless." Juhani's voice was solemn. "And we do not have an endless supply of air to rely upon."

"Is there any way of modifying this sonic emitter on a larger scale?" I queried. "A handheld device may not be powerful enough to repel all the sharks outside."

Sami and Kono shook their heads in unison; the latter wearing a dark scowl. "All our techs are dead. Killed by those insane Selkath – most of them are dead, now, too. Seems like we're the only ones left alive on this gods-forsaken base."

I struggled to sit up on the bench, jolts of agony shooting down my legs as I did so. I squeezed my eyes shut, containing a grimace as I battled to withstand the pain. _There is no emotion. _I allowed myself a few seconds respite, then opened my eyes again. The pain dulled to a manageable level.

From my vantage point at the head of the room I could view the camera outputs. They showed nothing but glaringly empty rooms. _Venturing out is our only option then. _But I battled to sit, let alone walk - and I could not heal myself.

"It appears we must brave the sharks," I said, my gaze fixed seriously on each of the others in turn. "I can use the Force to distract the swarm away from the harvesting machine. What other resources do we have? Sami, how many of these sonic devices are here?"

The dark-skinned human returned my gaze steadily. "Two. There's more in our storage rooms."

"You lot can't be serious," Canderous groused. "Only a laser-brain would think they could live through that swarm outside."

"It's possible!" Sami objected, swinging around to glare at Canderous. "Firaxans are attracted to vibrations and movements – as well as blood, of course. If you walk outside, very slowly, the sharks may not even notice you."

"Right." The Mandalorian's voice dripped liberally with sarcasm. "So you want us to go outside, walk very slowly at the sharks, all the while firing noise-makers at them?"

Sami grimaced, glancing down. She appeared somewhat ashamed of her own suggestion. "The harvesting machine isn't that far from Base, though. Only about a five minute walk – just at the edge of the rift, before the ruins.

"Ruins?" I interrupted, frowning. "What ruins?"

Sami shrugged. "We don't know. To be frank, the Republic has been more interested in harvesting the kolto in this new mine than investigating the ruins. Our workers have told us that it's a few broken structures, with some old machinery in the middle of it. None of them have looked closely – no one ever wants to stay outside any longer than necessary."

I'd frozen halfway through Sami's address, stunned surprise rendering me speechless. _The Star Map! It has to be! _What with the horror that lurked throughout this doomed station, I'd almost forgotten our original mission. Juhani's shocked eyes met mine, almost reluctantly. There was no choice now – one of us _had_ to brave outside. _But I cannot walk. Can I really request such a daunting task of Juhani? With her fear?_

"What's up with you?" Canderous barked. "Your face is all scrunched up like a kinrath pup."

"You cannot walk," Juhani muttered in a stumbling whisper. "And we cannot delay this." She drew in a shaky breath, and I could see realization painted starkly on her face. She had surmised, then, that she must go. _We cannot trust Canderous to get the coordinates. Only Juhani and I know about this._

The Mandalorian was scowling at both of us.

Slowly the fear on the Cathar's face was replaced with shaky determination; her mouth tensed, and I knew she was rallying her will power as steadfastly as possible. "I will go." Her eyes met mine; resolved and terrified, all at once.

"Juhani-"

"No, Bastila, I see it now. If I am to be tested, then I will not run. Not this time."

Grief echoed softly in her voice – I knew she was dwelling on her past. "No one is testing you, Juhani. And we do not need to investigate the Star Map now-"

"Star Map?" Kono interrupted.

"The Force led us here," Juhani countered. With every passing second, the fear slid from her eyes. A determined sort of resignation held station there instead. "It is time I faced my fear. I do not believe this is chance, Bastila."

I wondered how she had found such unwavering faith; sometimes, it seemed like mine was disintegrating slowly with each passing day.

Canderous spat on the ground; Kono shot him a repulsed glare. "Fine, guess I'll join you then, Cathar."

"But minutes before you were adamant you wouldn't go outside!" Kono blustered indignantly.

"Bah, it's better than sitting around here, listening to you lot whining," the Mandalorian said derisively. "If it's the only way to get to the surface," his eyes held mine firmly, "then looks like I ain't got no choice. Now give me one of those noise-makers."

xXx

It had been a torturous hour as we all struggled to prepare for the dangers ahead. Sami had spent the time explaining at length about the behavioural characteristics of firaxans; Juhani remained anxiously intent on her words, but Canderous had all but ignored the younger woman, choosing to rifle through cupboards and canisters instead. What he had expected to find of use in a research station, I did not know.

They had left mere minutes ago, headed towards the airlock Kono had directed them to. My stomach was tied up in tense knots, and my mind fogged fraught with apprehension. I did not like staying behind and leaving them to brave the danger outside, even as I logically knew that my part to play was crucial to our success. If I could not calm or distract the sharks, Canderous and Juhani would not have a chance.

"They've reached the airlock, and are suiting up," Kono informed us, standing in the circle of consoles at the end of the room. "We'll be able to communicate with them once they have their envirosuits on."

I was leaning uncomfortably against the wall, my weak limbs still spread out helplessly on the bench. Sami sat near me with a reassuring expression on her face. Since my frantic plight to aid Canderous, the woman had been more benevolently disposed towards me.

But worry stirred within, overshadowing all else. An unwelcome voice whispered that this was more than a fool's errand; that we may be sending Canderous and Juhani to a watery grave. _We seem to have no other choice, and I must have faith in the Force. There is a reason we were led here, and the Star Map is not far. _Yet how could they withstand the frenzied fury of the sharks? Our submersible had barely emerged from the swarm intact, and I dared not dwell upon the Force presence that seemed to fuel the rage of the firaxans. _For I may be facing that again. _I had to help them, and utilizing the Force – in a passive paradigm of my Battle Meditation – seemed to be the only way I could.

"_Yo,"_ a crackly voice emitted from Kono's station.

"Canderous," the scientist greeted him. "Hearing you loud and clear. Are you ready to leave?"

"_I am. The Cathar's standing around like a stimmed-up loon, though."_

_Juhani, _I thought desperately. _Do not let your fear overcome you._

"_Come on, kittycat. Let's not lollygag all day," _the derisive taunt slid out into the room.

"_Do not call me that, Mandalorian!" _ Juhani hissed. A raucous laugh echoed her.

"When you're ready, go through the airlock," Kono intervened. "I'll track your movements from here. There's no sharks near this side of the Base – you shouldn't have a problem until you near the harvesting machine."

I closed my eyes, pushing back despair and reaching out numbly for the Force. The affliction in my spine and legs had been dulled from painkillers, and disappeared into nothingness as I stretched out my senses. It always felt like this, this awed wonder, this reverence, as I half-departed my conscious body and enveloped my surroundings with awareness.

The Base itself was dead around me, a block of man-made structures that emitted no life. Further out, I could feel the frenetic sparks of the firaxans, heavily coalesced around something I surmised to be the harvesting machine. I could not sense that vast foreign being yet, but not far was a swirl of evil; a familiar taint in the Force – _the Star Map! It feels just like the one on Tatooine!_

"_We're out," _I barely registered Canderous' statement. _"Damn me, but it's hard to move in these sodding suits."_

"You're coming out past the kolto treatment rooms," Kono informed them. "Not far, and you'll see markers leading to the new harvesting machine."

"_It's dark." _Juhani's voice was a whisper. _"The water goes on forever here."_

I gathered in the tendrils of Force, pulling back to focus on the two of them. I could stimulate a sense of serenity around Juhani if needed, but would I attract the attention of the firaxans? I did not dare utilize the Force for anything bar awareness, not yet.

"_Bah, pull yourself together, Cathar,"_ Canderous jeered. _"You fight well when you're not whimpering."_

"Fight?" Sami spluttered nearby. "You can't fight in an envirosuit!" I vaguely heard the woman stir, and stride away towards Kono.

"_Thank you, Canderous. I shall be okay."_

"_Let's just do this before I die of boredom."_

My senses hovered over the two of them, and I could feel the sharp spike of fear recede from Juhani. She was not calm, but she was keeping her panic at bay. In relief, I extended the Force further, past the frenzied swarm and back around the Star Map. The evil aura both repulsed and fascinated me. _Revan came here once. _The firaxans had not been a problem a few years ago. I wondered briefly if the sharks were attracted to the dark Force that permeated this area.

"_We're by the markers," _Canderous said. _"There's a few fishies around, none close though."_

"If any are heading towards you, just stand still," Sami advised them. Her voice came from further away; she was obviously working next to Kono. My eyes stayed closed as I struggled to stay in a partial meditative state. "Don't use the sonic devices unless they get real close."

"_Yeah, yeah, I hear ya." _

"_What- what is that? Up ahead?" _Juhani's voice was shaky.

"You can probably see the swarm from here," Kono said. "These markers lead straight to it."

"_There's one shark- it's heading towards us!" _Juhani was panicking now; I reeled back in to hover over her presence, her desperation and fright sending ripples through the Force. An angry spark of life was homing in on them rapidly.

"Stay still!" Sami cried. "The shark may not bother with you if you don't move-"

A Mandalorian curse echoed from the console; I did not know enough of the language to comprehend it. Sami gasped, and I pulled desperately on the Force, ready to unleash it-

"_Well at least we know your little toys work," _Canderous barked out. _"That's one dead fishy, all right."_

Relief surged through me dizzyingly, and I held back – just in time.

"It's not dead, merely stunned." Sami's voice was acerbic.

"_I am sorry." _Juhani was barely audible. _"I know what to expect, now. I will not move next time."_

"_See that you don't," _Canderous said shortly. _"Let's go."_

Shame wafted from the Cathar; using the Force like this, I could almost smell it. It was an extra sense – a blend of sight and smell that permeated through me. I touched Juhani with the Force briefly, reassuringly, before moving further out.

I lingered over the swarm of sharks, and could sense the harvesting machine now, small jots of electronic impulses scarcely noticeable in the Force. It was intermittent and unsteady, almost as if the machine was no longer stable. Some of the firaxans were hurling themselves at it in rabid fury.

"_We're about as close as we can be," _Canderous said. _"Look, I don't see how we're gonna get any closer without being torn to shreds."_

"_Bastila will help us," _Juhani responded.

It was time, then. I dropped deeper into my trance, breathed in, and suspended myself over the writhing mass of sharks. Pure energy flooded through me. I knew how to influence this species now, after using Juhani's aid on our entrance to the station. I only hoped it would be enough.

I released a surge of peace, of passive calm, that settled around the swarm of sharks and infiltrated the aura of rage that surrounded them. Dazed confusion responded, but the crazed frenzy that had been there was dissipating. I felt some sparks of life turn tail and swim away.

In the periphery of my Force senses, something huge and ancient loomed. Trepidation broke my concentration – _No, I knew this was likely. If I cannot calm them, then perhaps I can distract them – _and then my hold on the Force was rocked by a vast righteous fury. I gasped, gathering myself desperately as I struggled to stay aware, to stay in a Force trance, all the while attempting to slip away from its focus and back to the swarm.

Wild ferocity shot back to life around me, and the mass of sharks turned as one, veering sharply towards the base. The dead electronic pulses of the harvesting machine were more noticeable, thrumming in an unsteady staccato beat as the sharks left it naked to my Force sight.

"_The sharks are clearing out. Blast, there's a drukload of them. Let's move, Cathar."_

I followed the swarm, deftly evading the sentient being who seemed to wield such great power, even if it was so incredibly foreign and primitive to my senses. The firaxans had reached a wall of the Station, and began to flail and thrash against it in rabid fury.

"What- what's that, Kono? I can see something through the window!"

I discharged another passive torrent of Force power, only to find it blocked from even reaching the sharks below.

_What? How can it do that?_

"Kono, look! The sharks – I think they're attacking the base!"

"_Got it! Easier than the girls at Roxy's cantina."_

"_Canderous has turned the machine off. Should it be rumbling so?"_

"I- Sami, it's ferracrystal, it'll hold. It has to!"

The vast entity smashed once more into my web of Force, and my senses reeled and staggered under the onslaught. I felt my grip on the Force unravel slightly.

"_It's just powering down. Taking awhile though. No, it- damn, it's unstable- get out of here!"_

"Canderous? What's going on out there?"

"_Cathar, you're going the wrong bloody way! It's going to blow!"_

"_I must find the Star Map, Mandalorian! I will not fail!"_

"Kono, the window's flexing – there's hundreds of those sharks out there! We need to get out of this room!"

Horror seared through me as I desperately tried to hold myself together. Vaguely I was aware that everyone was in trouble, and the sharks were now attacking the Base itself. I wildly thrust my awareness out further, away from the Base in the desperate hope the swarm would follow. But all that came was the almighty force I could barely defend against.

_**Bastila, can you hear me?**_

The presence slammed into me again, and I felt a scream loose from my throat as I was taken unawares. I was holding too tightly onto the Force, my very mind enmeshed with the channels I was pushing out, and the vast being was tearing it to shreds, pulverizing my senses as I struggled frantically to evade it.

_**Look, I'm back on Manaan. What the frell is going on?**_

The raged being actively chased me – _No! _– I reeled my senses in hurriedly, but it slammed into me again and again, my very thoughts fraying and blurring until my awareness narrowed to nothing but pure unmitigated terror.

With a last sharp burst of colour, I felt my mind disintegrate into a thousand shards.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Replies to reviews:**_

_**Dark Lord Daishi** – Stay tuned to find out...  
**Kosiah** – Thanks! It's sometimes hard to switch between characters and keep their personality true. I've always been impressed with how you've managed it. Re: Kylah – she's mentioned in a Bastila backflash (chap 14) and a Karon one (chap 35), but the Jedi were not aware of her survival, let alone defection. The Genoharadan are (see Eridius' POV, chap 31), and Kylah's mission to take out Bastila is mentioned in Saul's POV (chap 31)  
**Nikeon** – Oops, sorry, here's another cliff-hanger!  
**Mark Solo** – Thanks, glad you like.  
**Lord Demandred** – Thanks, I will certainly try.  
**Curtis** – Saying that will just jinx my hard drive, y'know :-P  
_


	42. No more running

_**Disclaimer - See chapter one.**_

* * *

**Chapter Forty-two – No more running**

_- Jen Sahara -_

* * *

The cerulean sphere of Manaan loomed large through the cockpit window as the ship neared. It brought with it bitter recriminations; a day ago, I'd been in the Ebon Hawk, orchestrating a betrayal of the very crew that had guarded my back these past few weeks. I was not looking forward to the reunion. 

It didn't help that Bastila wasn't answering. The bond felt faint and deadened, like a hazy, intangible mist – visible, and yet entirely elusive. I hoped it was merely the distance separating us that caused it to feel so; when I'd last been on Manaan, it had been impossible to ignore Bastila's overbearing presence.

"_This is Manaan Spaceport Control. Identify yourself_," a crackly voice shot from the transmission, first in Basic, then Selkath. My view was painted by an endless blue panorama.

I knew my lines; HK was nothing if not thorough. The ship's signature was Czerka, and somehow he'd procured Czerka security codes as well. I leaned forward. "This is Janna Terran from Czerka Corporation, requesting clearance to land. Transmitting my clearance codes now."

I sent the data quickly, holding my breath for the reply. I trusted the droid's impressive abilities, and yet if the Selkath were to turn us away, I'd likely run out of fuel before reaching a new destination. Finally, after a pause of minutes, a sibilant reply echoed into the cockpit.

"_You have clearance to land, Ms Terran. Transmitting your atmospheric entry code and coordinates for Czerka docking bay R13. A reminder that all trade goods must be passed by customs first."_

"Thank you." I shut the comm. off, and guided the ship closer, switching to repulsors as we entered the tranquil atmosphere. But on top of everything else, my possession of this very vehicle was weighing worryingly on my mind.

"We've just stolen an Exchange ship," I muttered to myself as a console blinked with incoming landing coordinates. "Czerka's not stupid; they'll find out the signature's been forged, and that we nicked their security clearance. I need to get rid of this ship. Somehow..."

"Statement: That is well within my capabilities, master," HK-47's monotone voice scythed through the air; an abrupt, foreboding reply. I'd almost forgotten he was there.

My eyes closed in a blend of exasperation and dread. HK was conveniently handy in a fight, but I found it hard to dismiss the chaos we'd left while departing Rii'shn. _And exactly how would a droid ditch a ship anyway? Blow it up? _I grimaced.

A pulse in the Force snagged my attention; at first, I thought it was the bond. But as Ahto City crested the endless azure horizon, I deduced it was something else. My eyes narrowed. I hadn't even realized I'd been open to the Force; it was becoming instinctive to grasp onto it, ready for any complication or danger.

_And that, in itself, is pretty scary with Sith Bitch in my head. _I stretched my awareness out further; it felt clumsy and crude, but adequate for my purposes. The Force flared brightly then vanished, like a flame snuffed in the dark.

"Query: Master, do you wish me to take care of this problem for you?" HK echoed.

"Uh..." I trailed off vaguely. My sense of Bastila remained tenuous at best, but she had to be in Ahto City somewhere. The Force flickered once more – someone, somewhere, was wielding it. If it wasn't Bastila, then it would be that master of hers. Pity I couldn't think of a foreseeable reason for her to unleash the Force like that.

I needed to find Bastila, I wanted to avoid that Jedi Master, and the last thing I desired was the complication of Czerka suspicions and red-tape.

"Okay, fine. Just... don't hurt anyone!"

HK's eyes gleamed red with approval.

xXx

_Bastila, can you hear me?_

My boots left rubbery scuff marks on the gleaming Manaan floors. Despite my distraction, I couldn't help but feel a perverse sort of pleasure at that.

It had been easy enough to land in the Czerka docking bay, instinctive to persuade the Selkath official that my fee was covered under the Czerka maintenance agreement. Protocol droids infested the area like a plague of mites; attaining directions to the Republic Embassy was hardly laborious.

I was back in Ahto City, anxiety and nervousness curdling in my stomach. I dreaded the reactions of my former crewmates, but it could not compare to the terror of having Revan in my head.

This revelation was too colossal – running was no longer an option.

I'd expected the bond to be palpable again, now that I was in Ahto City. It wasn't. Bastila felt eons away; occasionally, faltering tremors of emotions slid through the mind-link, so faint and indistinct that I wondered if it was merely my overwrought imagination.

_Doesn't it just figure, _I muttered darkly to myself. _The one time I actually want to talk to her, she's impossible to reach. _It was ironically amusing, in a twisted why-does-this-happen-to-me sort of way. No matter what Bastila did, it seemed guaranteed to provoke my animosity.

_Just what do I know of Bastila Shan anyway? _Other than she was prissy, stuck-up, and prone to panicking. But perhaps that wasn't fair… _She's been bonded all this time to Revan. _I shuddered, presuming the only thing worse would be to have said Sith Lord hosting a tea party inside your actual mind.

_But she's young... years younger than me. Still a Padawan, and thrust into the middle of this war because of her Battle Meditation. _I didn't like her, I certainly didn't trust her, and yet I couldn't halt an unwanted modicum of sympathy.

_I need to find her... and fast. _My alternative was tracking down the Jedi Council themselves – and considering they were the ones who'd implanted Revan in my head... _Well, they'd probably just reinforce Jen Sahara. _But could I live with the knowledge that should my control drop – and the gods knew how often _that_ seemed to happen – then Revan would assume control once more? _No! I can keep that bitch at bay. I have to! _

I lengthened my strides, hurrying through a vast courtyard dappled with incoming rays of sunlight. The Force thrummed and coiled not far away. I was heading straight for it; it appeared to be coming from the Republic Embassy. _And I can barely sense Bastila. _An icy premonition shook me, dousing my proliferate thoughts. _Kath crap. There can't be an attack. Not on Manaan._

_But something **is** happening._

I pushed out through the bond again, this time in desperation. _Look, I'm back on Manaan. What the frell is going on?_ I frowned as once more, there was no reply. My concentration turned inward to the wavering link that connected us; if anything, it felt weaker than before.

I was completely unprepared for a powerful, alien surge of Force power to slam through the bond. I stumbled, gasping _Bastila?! _as the foreign energy immediately ceased, leaving behind a withering connection to the only source of help I dared approach.

Panic struck within – _What's going on? Are you there? _– and the bond dimmed to a vague memory, a link fraying to near imperceptibility. Bastila was still there, but so faint I was starting to believe her life was in dire peril.

"Hey!" someone called in protest; I'd absently pushed past them while floundering through the milling throng. I turned, quickly gathering disseminated thoughts; a group of Sith solders in tan uniform were eyeing me over curiously. _Oh great, _I thought sourly. _I swear these guys breed like gizka. _The one who'd objected had a surprised look on his face as he nodded amiably at me.

_Cordial Sith? What's next, charitable Hutts? _Clarity struck me, and I cursed my own stupidity. _This cloak I picked up on Rii'shn could pass for a Dark Jedi's garb. And my lightsaber isn't exactly concealed. _It was deactivated, but the flutterings in the Force left me uneasy, and I'd been clenching it tightly since I'd traipsed past the Selkath customs official. Once more, I regretted I'd lost the second 'saber. The last time I'd fought with one weapon I'd had this itchy feeling that my guard was wide open.

I nodded back, containing a grimace, and resumed a quick pace to the Embassy. Another nudge through the mind link achieved nothing; my best course of action was to move. I strode past a pair of Rodians chatting in exuberant voices that cut through my internal preoccupations.

"(She's worth betting on, Lagos! This girl Twi'lek has only been swooping today, and already she's matched Queedle's time!)"

I glanced at them briefly.The two Rodians looked deeply engrossed in their conversation, and both wore the fire retardant outfits of swoop racers.

"(She's completed one race, and you think she's the next great,)" the other scoffed. "(She's got no commercial backer, and that angry walking hairball that shadows her will stop any from approaching. Anyway, how many times have you thrown credits on would-be champions, only to see them crumple before Hukta Jax?)"

_Nah, it couldn't be. _"(Excuse me,)" I interrupted them in Rodese. They both turned to stare at me warily. "(I couldn't help overhearing your conversation. What's the name of this new swoop racer?)"

"(She calls herself 'Bek from Taris',)" the first Rodian said excitedly. "(A bit naff, really – everyone's claiming to be a swooper from Taris these days, since the records were destroyed in the Sith bombardment.)"

My lips twitched. _Mission, what are you doing? _"(Ah. Doing well, is she?")

"(Yeah! Did you see her today?)" he replied happily. "(Not bad, for a first try, for someone so young!)"

_Well, at least I know where she is. _I nodded affably at the Rodians and bid them farewell, striding off towards the Embassy. _Not sure if she'll talk to me though._

I turned a corner, and emerged into a sweeping plaza that was even grander than the previous. Extravagant pools of crystalline water immediately drew the eye; fountains spat streams of liquid that sparkled in the light. The ground was highly polished marble, and beyond the pools loomed pillars that announced entrance to a majestic building.

But something was wrong. People huddled in small groups, some pointing anxiously towards the large doors nestled between the pillars. Security droids hovered in buzzing clusters.

Nearby, vibrations of Force pulsed a warning.

My stomach lurched as I realized I could no longer sense Bastila. _That building's got to be the Embassy, and someone inside is throwing the Force around like it's the latest fashion. _I felt cold. My rampant thoughts couldn't help but merge into one conclusive deduction: the Republic was under attack.

_But the Sith wouldn't dare, not on Manaan! They'd be defying the neutrality agreement!_ Then again, the Sith were hardly a sterling example of adept strategy.

Sometimes, I wondered if a Twi'lek dancing girl would do a better job of leading the Sith Empire. But that was a dangerous line of thinking, considering who was lolling about in my head.

_Dammit, I thought it was bad enough with the Genoharadan. Why have they attacked? I thought their sodding kolto supply hinged on the neutrality laws! _Which meant that the Sith were happy enough to throw away their share.

Everything fell into place. _Of course. They're after Bastila. They sent the Genoharadan to kill me, and Dark Jedi to capture her. _Fear coiled in my stomach, but I brushed it aside ruthlessly. _I'm insulted, dammit. They must have considered me the easy option. _But – that meant the Sith had contracted the Genoharadan to come after me. Why would the Sith be after _me_?

_Duh. I have Revan in my head. _A glacial chill crept laggardly through my veins. _How could they know about her? And if they know, who else does? _

It all came back to Bastila – only she could answer my questions. _But if the Embassy's been attacked..._

If they managed to capture Bastila, then there went my explanation – and possibly, my only chance at getting rid of this unwanted hag in my head. _I'm not a coward, no matter who I am. I have to get inside._

I glanced around hurriedly; so far, no uniformed Selkath were in sight. But they wouldn't be far away. I shook my head irritably, inhaled deep, and broke into a run.

Vaguely I was aware of the gasps of Ahto City residents as I careened past the superfluous pools of water, and through the ceremonious pillars. A large door towered just beyond; I was willing to bet it was locked down from the inside.

"Halt!" a garbled shriek from behind had me spinning around, mere paces from the closed doors. A deluge of Selkath military was flowing into the courtyard; the leader of the closest squad had a gun aimed directly at me.

From this distance, a mere twenty metres, it looked like a disruptor rifle. My past memories were disjointed and vague, but I knew there were some things a lightsaber could not block. My weapon, gripped furtively in my right hand, was still deactivated.

"You are under arrest for violating the neutrality agreement! Lay down your weapon, Sith, or we shall open fire!"

_Sith? _The tan-uniformed soldiers had acknowledged me earlier. With mounting horror, I inwardly cursed the black robe that cloaked my bloodstained armour, and announced me as an enemy to the Republic. _If the Selkath want to arrest me on sight, then the Sith are already inside._

_And there ain't no way I'm surrendering to a bunch of walking fish._

My eyes flicked frantically around the courtyard as the Selkath squad took a step closer, guns trained on me. More armoured soldiers inundated the vast plaza, dispersing the huddled groups of civilians that had cloistered in the corners mere minutes ago.

I had to get inside; raw survival instinct overrode my growing panic, and I felt myself grasp out to the Force, stretching senses behind me into the Embassy. I could pick out two Force users, and a swirling of electrical impulses that coalesced into a mass of complex circuitry. A brief moment of surprise assailed me, even as I stared numbly at the advancing Selkath.

_What is this? I must be sensing... the door controls?_

But the tiny, dancing oscillations were far too complicated for me to manipulate – I could barely comprehend what I was sensing.

_You dumbstruck nerf-herder, it's child's play! _a derisive voice sneered. A surge of contempt swelled up inside, catching me off-guard and wresting the Force from my grasp. _Don't let her take over!_ I felt the Force meld into the electrical vibrations, into a quick surge of energy that tightened to a pulse and then vanished.

A grating noise sounded from behind.

The closest Selkath gasped, yanking his blaster up to aim past me, and before I was fully cognizant I had whirled around and leapt towards half-open door. My surroundings stretched in that all-too-familiar way as I dived forwards into a roll, laser fire stretching into long bright lines all around me.

A robed figure inside held a red lightsaber, but in my heightened speed, I saw the laser bolts jar slowly into his torso before he had a chance to deflect them. My environs lurched back into normal time as both the door hissed shut behind me and the Dark Jedi screamed, collapsing to the floor.

_Selkath one, Sith nil,_ I thought humourlessly, my eyes snagging on a second figure, whose hand was pressed desperately against the door control. Unsteadily, I scrambled to my feet, furtively glancing around the entrance foyer. The body of a receptionist lay behind a poraclay desk, and near one of the exits sprawled three Republic corpses.

"Who are you?" the Dark Jedi growled, swinging his lightsaber up defensively.

_What, no immediate attack? _I felt my mouth twist as I appraised the robed figure. _Even Dark Jedi think I'm one of them._ "Reinforcements," I quipped. "Latest orders are to head outside and surrender to the Selkath authorities."

I saw the man twitch, heard him snarl, and activated my lightsaber just in time to counter a wild lunge.

"You're not one of us!" he hissed, as sparks flew from our crossed 'sabers.

"What gave me away?" I panted, leaping backwards as he pulled back to strike again. "My cloak not the right shade of black?"

I made out a vague shadow of a sneer underneath his dark hood. "You'll die for your interference, weakling!" His off-hand raised in a sinister motion; I flung out my arm in a honed reflex, 'saber leaving my grasp and heading straight for him. _Pitiful little Sithling. He should be on his knees! _A blossoming of rage warmed in my belly as spinning red gouged into the Dark Jedi's arm. He shrieked in anguish, his severed hand splattering on the ground as the 'saber snapped back into my hand.

"You – you bitch!" he gasped, doubling over as the lightsaber in his remaining hand wavered. His dismembered arm hugged tight against his torso.

I felt a cold smile curve my lips as the sweet surge of victory danced through me. "True Sith don't let pain stop them," I taunted. I took a confident step forward, lazily flinging my weapon out in a lunge. He parried ineffectively, groaning with the effort as he staggered back. I threw my weight behind the lightsaber, and the Dark Jedi stumbled, falling with a cry.

"You should have stuck to trooping," I whispered, as I drove the 'saber deep into his chest.

His scream was cut off as his flesh cauterized around my 'saber; I yanked it out, staring fixedly as spurts of warm blood speckled over his thrashing corpse. The cadence of rage and smug superiority froze; reality crashed a cacophony in my mind and my very words replayed sickeningly over and over.

_True Sith... _My cognition splintered into stark fear. _Damn you, Sith Bitch. Get out of my sodding head! _I hadn't even noticed the transition; she'd smoothly taken over as soon as there'd be an opening. I swallowed past a lump in my throat.

I knew, then, that Revan was stronger than whoever I was. _Well, duh. She wasn't the Dark Bitch of the Sith for nothing. _Gaining entrance to the Embassy had been her work, as had searing off that Sith's arm. _I'd be a pile of guts back on Rii'shn if she hadn't taken over. _Every time my life was in mortal peril, Revan saved me in her rage and violence and gratuitous disregard for life. _But she killed so many... what if she takes over for good? How many more will she slaughter?_

_Will I even realize it?_ The Force pulsed somewhere nearby, shattering my horrified thoughts. _I need to stop whimpering and find Bastila. She's the only one who can help me now._

I shook free of my frozen stance, and strode out of the room, heading down a stark corridor that gleamed with wealth. Black burns speckled the walls, residue from blaster fire. I passed a door, and heard whispered voices within; soldiers, no doubt, hiding from the Dark Jedi that had infiltrated this place.

A shriek echoed through the halls, followed closely by a surge in the Force. The passioned fury swelled once more inside, overriding my fear, my determination. I pushed back against it, desperate. _I won't become her! Never again! I'd rather die! _The dark emotions ebbed somewhat, even as logic reminded me that death was a distinct possibility.

I cleared a corner, as someone sneered, "You'd better run, little boy."

Two heads swivelled around to stare at my approach. One, a Dark Jedi, the other, a young Twi'lek who was cowering on the floor. He held a short green lightsaber, and despair was etched deeply into his face. Blood dripped from his lekku.

"Come to join the fun?" the Dark Jedi drawled, eyeing me over. My eyes snapped to the young Twi'lek; frantic tenacity sparked through his features and he lunged forward, stabbing his 'saber deep into the Sith's thigh.

The Dark Jedi let out an agonized scream, flinging his lightsaber round in retaliation. I gasped, running forward, but the Twi'lek dodged underneath the red blade and flicked his 'saber towards the other's torso. The black robe shrivelled and burnt as lightsaber met flesh.

The robed figure grunted, voice turning to a splutter as he collapsed to his knees. Bright red entrails gaped from within the folds of his cloak.

The Twi'lek scrambled fully to his feet, horror paling his cheeks as he gazed upon the dying Force user. His eyes flicked to me and he yelped, stumbling backwards before whirling around. _He thinks I'm one of them._

"Wait!" I yelled, but the panicking boy paid me no heed, sprinting further down the corridor and out of sight. I followed in desperation, muscles straining as I forced them to work harder. _Who was that? _A young Jedi apprentice by the looks, but I hadn't expected to see any other Force users on Manaan.

I slid around a corner, but the Twi'lek was nowhere in sight. Bursts of raw energy were still pulsing nearby; my grip on the Force was tenuous, and I did not dare draw anymore in. _I should find out who else is wielding the Force. _Was Bastila somewhere in the building? Knocked unconscious, and almost dead? If so, would I find her in time?

_What about the others?_ I tasted relief at the knowledge Mission and Zaalbar had fled the Embassy._ Juhani? Canderous? Carth? _If I had not run from Manaan, would I have been able to help them?

I barely registered the opulence of the place; polished walls gleaming with wealth and pride, marred with the occasional smatter of blood. I stepped over bodies – unconscious or dead, I didn't stop to check – the waves of Force power being melded and transformed in the distance were reeling me in, like a slave to its master.

I had not felt power like this for… a long time. But it was fading rapidly; whatever battle was ensuing, was almost over.

A tortured wail rung out through the Embassy's lavish rooms, and I froze outside a door, clutching my lightsaber tightly.

"Worm!" someone hissed on the other side. "You just don't know when to stay dead, do you?"

I thumped my hand on the door controls, and carnage burst into view. Two steps in front was a slain Dark Jedi, head and shoulders cleaved by what had to have been a lightsaber. Grisly cauterized chunks of flesh spattered the ground next to the corpse, and as I raised my gaze in horror, more broken bodies greeted me.

But deeper in the depths of this perdition, a black robed figure was throwing lightening that sparked and flashed over a body trapped against the wall.

A snarl ripped from my throat, and a flood of sweet tasting Force filled me with power, with life, with victory. I yanked it furiously towards me, and the perpetrator tumbled backwards like a dustball thrown into the wind.

I vaguely noticed the victim fall to a heap by the wall – my attention was solely focused on the Dark Jedi slowly rising to their feet. I stalked in, but blood was everywhere, fraying at the edges of my vision-

_This is what Revan does, _my conscience taunted. _I can't let her out…I can't! _

"Who are you?" the figure growled at me. "How dare you interrupt me – do you know who I am?" The Dark Jedi shot me a furious glare, and beneath the hood of the black robe I could make out slanting eyes discoloured an unnatural yellow. She brandished a red lightsaber threateningly at me.

"Yes, I have one of those too," I snapped, raising mine higher in response. "And frankly, I'm more interested in the breeding habits of banthas than I am in your identity."

"Interloper!" she snarled. "Whoever you are, you picked the wrong battle to join!"

_I'm not afraid of her, _I realized in surprise. _Not in the least. _Well, what was one Dark Jedi when compared to having the Sith Lord battle with you for control over your own mind?

"Wait," the woman breathed, and actually took a stumbling step backwards. Sickly yellow eyes widened under her hood. "You! You're supposed to be-"

"Yeah, yeah, dead, I know," I drawled, feeling my lips twist in dry humour. _She knows. She knows about the Genoharadan ambush... and about Revan_. "What can I say? I'm a talented individual."

The Dark Jedi paused, and I could see the confidence steep back into her stance. She walked forward, slowly but assuredly, and I recognized she was not quite as worried about me as I had hoped.

"Well, well," her voice turned low and silky. I stiffened. _Have I met her before? She almost sounds... familiar. _"It must be my lucky day. I only came here for Bastila, but now it looks as if I'll capture two prizes instead of one."

My eyes narrowed. "I know you," I said slowly.

She laughed, and I heard the tones of an Aldaraanian accent. "They really did a number on you, didn't they? We met less than a month ago, _Jen Sahara._"

_…_

"_You have everything you need?" the Jedi asked me quietly, her eyes seeming to pierce through to my soul. I looked down briefly, unused to such attention. Despite the plain brown robes the Jedi onboard the Endar Spire wore, I could not help but feel they_ _appeared resplendent in their serenity._

"_Y-yes, Jedi Shan," I answered quietly. "Everyone has – has been kind."_

_I looked up to see Jedi Bastila Shan smile benevolently at me. Her companion, the one I recognized as Knight Kylah Aramai nodded briskly. A bored look crossed her face, and I felt embarrassed that I had taken time of people so powerful._

"_I notice you have downloaded many archaeological journals in the last few days," Jedi Shan continued. "If you have need for more information, do not hesitate to ask me."_

_I nodded, looking away shyly. A hand upon my shoulder caught my attention, and once more I glanced up into Bastila's aristocratic face. Her expression was poised, peaceful... with the glimmer of some foreign emotion in her dark eyes I could not decipher._

"_Do not be afraid to talk to me, Jen Sahara. I promise I will not bite."_

_I heard a stifled snort from the other Jedi, and flushed._

"_Th- thank you, Jedi Shan. I shall."_

_Her smile blossomed in farewell, and she moved to the doorway of my quarters, Knight Kylah following on her heels. As the two Jedi walked away, I could not help but overhear Kylah's parting comment._

"_Honestly, Bastila, she is just a simple scholar," she drawled in a silky voice. "Why you feel the urge to check up on such a quiet little mouse, I do not know."_

_…__  
_

"Of course, I did not know who you were back then, otherwise events may have played out very differently," Kylah's voice dragged me back to the present. "I hope you enjoyed your freedom while it lasted."

"You're the traitor," I said quietly. "You're the reason the Endar Spire was attacked, and that everyone died."

She scoffed disbelievingly. "That's a little hard to take, from _you. _Can't remember the blood on your hands? Or is it that you don't know who you really are yet?" She loosed a surprised laugh. "Considering how _appropriate_ your garb is, I find that a little hard to believe."

"I know exactly who I am," I bit out through clenched teeth. _I just don't know my own name. And I am not **her. **_No two-bit little Jedi traitor was going to get the best of me! "Why'd you defect, Kylah? Getting a bit cold in Bastila's shadow? Did it gall that you had to follow her around, even though you were the Knight and she merely a Padawan?" The taunts rolled off my tongue like honey; the ability to sense weakness and manipulate it... was this Street Kid's gift, or _hers?_

Kylah stiffened, and I saw rage contort the sickly lines in her face. "Don't you dare judge me, you pathetic worm! You're nothing but the shell of a former time... and your time is up!"

I felt the Force crest within her, and before I had time to blink, the woman had leaped in front of me, lightsaber poised to cleave through my head. A surprised yelp released from my throat as I parried wildly, feeling the force of her blow resonate through my arms. The criss-cross of red burned into my vision as she pushed hard against me, the 'sabers moving infinitesimally closer.

A wave of malice swept through me. The boiling rage tasted so sweet, it would be so easy to just surrender- _I won't let her take control, not again!_

"You are truly nothing now," Kylah whispered, sneering from beyond our blades. She grunted, straining against me, and I could sense the Force riding through her, enhancing her strength and reflexes. I couldn't keep this up, not without relinquishing my sanity. _No, there must be another way!_

I yanked hard on the Force as desperate instinct took over. Grunting, I shoved fiercely against her 'saber, then leapt clear backwards, flipping in the air and landing on my feet. _I won't get mad, I won't get mad, I won't-_

"Oh, very nice," Kylah drawled, striding towards me. "Did dear little Bastila teach you that? Let's see if you can block this!"

Before I could even gauge her intentions, the room was filled with bright sparks of agonized pain. I was flung to the back wall, having just enough sense left to clutch onto my lightsaber desperately, but-

The pain, the hot sparking torment burned through my flesh, my muscles, my head- _No! No! I must stop this! I- I won't- I'm sorry, Mal! How- how- _Everything morphed into a world of torturous agony and grief.

_Get up, you snivelling coward! _The pain was receding now, slowly, but surely. Vaguely I was aware of Kylah laughing as my muscles creaked and twitched. _Fight back! I should be able to block her!_

"Oh my, you _are_ weak!" Kylah crowed. "I cannot believe I was worried about facing you! The pathetic Council really failed with you, did they not? Malak will be most pleased." Her hand was still raised, blue sparks crackling between her long fingers.

I was gasping, harsh pants that rattled in my chest as I glared mutinously at Kylah. _She's too strong! _No, no she wasn't. _That pitiful Sith wannabe is no challenge. I wouldn't let her lick my boots! _The dark fury I associated with Revan bloomed in my head, in my very soul. I had just enough sanity left to obstruct it. _I won't give in to her! I won't lose control again!_

"Ooh, you want some more?" Kylah mocked, and another jet of lightening spiked from her, engulfing me again with fierce, hot agony. I gritted my teeth, fighting against the harrowing torment, the burning that was burrowing deep into me- a scream issued from my lungs, despite myself. _I can't- I can't-_

Anger, hot and caustic, grew in my mind, fighting against the tearing pain that threatened to overwhelm everything. I could surrender to the dark hatred pummelling through me, but then, once more, Revan would win.

"My, this is fun," Kylah murmured, in between bouts of lacerating torture. My vision slowly blurred to normality, as I recognized I was crumpled on the ground, wheezing and shaking. My weapon had already rolled out from cramped fingers. _I'll die, _I realized numbly. _I'll die in this very room, if I don't capitulate._

The barbed spikes of electricity seared into me again, and I could hear myself screaming. Flashes of nameless people sparked chaotically through my head, and I thrashed wildly as coherence dissolved. The anger, the roiling black rage, crested through me in a wave, offering a dark and ominous salvation.

My alternative, it seemed, was certain death.

I felt my resistance fray under the never-ending torture. I was poised on a precipice, forced to choose between two options, one that would damn my life, and the other, my soul.

With sinking trepidation, I surrendered to the malevolence that simmered in my mind. The antagonism, the fury, and the vengeance clawed through me, and this time I embraced it. I let the barriers drop against the dark turmoil of emotions that swept aside lucidity and took abrupt command of my senses.

My thoughts twisted cruelly – _Kill her! Force her to beg for her pitiful existence, and then end it! _– and I snapped my head up, rising to my feet. The lightening scalded my skin, but I cast it aside as just another pained memory.

"What?" Kylah spat, hand dropping in surprise as I took a casual step through her electric storm. The white hot sparks faded from her fingertips as she gaped at me with incredulity.

"Don't count me out just yet, Kylah," I breathed. I raised a hand, and felt my 'saber return to my grasp with a satisfying snap. I took another stride forward, fighting against twitching muscles that were slow to respond – my body would list to _my_ commands - _I am the master here! _"You have no idea what you have just unleashed."

"You-" She shook her head angrily. "You are a pathetic failure! I am not scared of _you!_"

"You should be," I murmured, my lips twisting. The Force rode deep within me, amplified by loathing and rage. That she had _dared_ to unleash lightning on _me_; that I had fallen to my knees in front of that rankweed-sucking cantina rat galled me; and the righteous fury burst out in a flood of energy that lashed through the room.

Kylah stumbled back, once, twice, but held her ground. _She's strong. But not strong enough - I will see her crawl before the end! _No more pissing about with lightsabers and petty Force powers, I had the ability to assume control over life and death, and I would unleash it here!

The rage exploded inside me, swelling out through me like a thousand piercing daggers, agonizing and yet oddly satisfying. A wail tore from my lungs as my vision darkened to red; a pulsing, crackling black aura sprung to life around me. _Rage can be used to increase power tenfold. _And I knew that, oh, how I knew that!

"What- no!" she yelled, stepping back involuntarily. "You can't-"

"Oh yes I can!" I snarled, and my free hand flung out, unleashing a wave of poisoned energy that buffeted through the room. I could feel the sweet taste of it as it soaked into her skin, tainting her limbs with decaying corruption. I was supreme here, no one could withstand _me!_

"You-" she spluttered, stepping further back. Her hood had been pushed off her face, and her cheeks were pale with fear. Sickly yellow eyes widened in panicked realization, and I could taste the horror that began to permeate her mind. "Sith's blood!" she swore, flinging a jet of electricity that blinded my vision and sparked white through the room.

_Oh, she thinks that will work again? _The Force was _mine_ to control, and it slammed away her torrent of lightning like a cloud of moths, but-

Kylah had gone.

_What? That was merely a diversion? That cowardly maggot!_ Pure, unadulterated anger suffused me and I snarled, reeling in the Force to bolster my speed as I prepared to pursue-

A pained moan – quiet, barely audible – tore through the fog of senseless power and fury that controlled my very senses. The berserking aura fractured and smashed, and the Force departed in a torrent, slipping out from my unwieldy grasp. I gasped as exhaustion and agony hit my senses, the lacerating pain that was etched into muscles weak from Kylah's bombardment.

The fury, the hatred, the sheer contempt for everything, had dissolved and left me shattered.

I was bone tired and felt crippled, utterly spent. I had not the energy to race after that traitorous Sith, and I doubted I could survive the encounter.

_Revan. I didn't just let her take over, I handed her the sodding controls! _Once more, Evil Bitch had saved me. _But at what cost? I'm losing my mind to her! _Chilling horror shuddered through me. I'd been determined to hold Revan at bay, yet this time, it had been a conscious decision to yield.

I heard the whimper once more, and allowed it to snatch my attention to a brown-clad body deeper in the room. _Bastila's Jedi Master... _I took a step closer, dragging wearied limbs, as I felt the dread riding my system mount.

The Jedi Master stirred slightly. There were small horns framing a dark-skinned face. _Zabrak, _my mind issued helpfully. I stood over her, staring down motionlessly at the Master who could help me or damn me. _Or both..._

Her eyes opened, a flare of turquoise against a gaunt face, and I was swept away.

…

_Nothing. _

_There was nothing but unworldly rage that inundated me, soaking into my very soul. I knew nothing, and could feel nothing but immense fury._

_I welcomed it. Somehow, I knew it was better than the alternative._

"_We can begin the implantation shortly. She is so far gone... I am not convinced this is the best course of action."_

What was that?

"_You made your reservations clear at the meeting, Karon. This is the choice we all agreed upon."_

_I battled against the thick fog clouding me; somehow, railing at the inevitable felt familiar. Something convulsed and jerked; with an absent sort of reflection I realized it was my body. I gasped, shuddered, and-_

"_Put her back under! Quick!"_

_-my eyes peeled open. Vague, out-of-focus images swam hazily in front of me. Someone was leaning over me. Dark skin, small horns protruding from a blurry face._

Karon? No. No!

"_Two hypos – that's more than enough."_

_My vision, my confusion, and then finally my unswerving rage dissolved into nothing._

…

Horror crested within – what exactly was I remembering? Was that when they'd stuck Revan in my head? This so-called Jedi Master had been part of it?

"It was you!" I hissed, my face curling in vicious anger as I glared down at the dying Zabrak. My lightsaber cut a beam of red anger in front of me.

Her chest rattled with shallow breaths; blood drenched her austere robes and formed a sickly puddle underneath her.

"I failed you..." a whisper issued from the Zabrak; I strained to catch it.

"Failed?" My voice rose in disbelief. "You screwed with my mind! Why?_ Why is she in there?_"

"Please..." Her bright turquoise eyes closed, and her arm twitched. A deactivated 'saber rolled meekly from her grasp. "My lightsaber... keep it. Let it guide you."

I stared at her, incredulous and stunned speechless. _She thinks her lightsaber is sufficient recompense for tearing apart my mind? _I stood still, frozen with confounded disbelief.

Her eyes stayed tightly closed, and her face had drained to a sickly grey. There were things I needed to ask, questions begging to be raised, but I found myself unable to formulate a reply as she lay there, dying in front of me.

I didn't need to wield the Force to feel her life draining away.

"Forgive me," she whispered, exhaling, and did not take another breath.

My limbs were rigid; all I could do was gaze down at the woman who had taken my sanity from me. And I still did not know why.

_Forgive me..._

The words swelled on the Force as I sensed the life dim from the Zabrak, dim until there was nothing left.

_Forgive you? How can I? Because of you, my mind is a minefield! Because of you, I have Revan inside my head!_

But I felt empty; the rage ebbed away as I stood, staring silently at the lifeless Zabrak. Karon had known the answers... and I'd been so scared I'd lost the chance to learn from her. And Bastila... _where is she?_

I heard a scuffle to my right; reflexes I barely acknowledged had me leaping backwards as laser bolts discharged through the room. Pain scored deep into my shoulder.

"Die, Sith schutta!" an angry, male voice bellowed. I faced my next danger – a beaten, bloody Republic officer wielding what looked like a kid's toy in his hands-

"_Carth?"_ I cried in stunned disbelief. A dull throbbing from my shoulder made me wince – it was superficial and shallow, but I'd had more wounds in the last few days than was objectively healthy. "You bloody shot me!"

His jaw dropped in a comic display of shock; if I hadn't been so overwhelmed by everything, I probably would have laughed. "Jen?" he croaked weakly, his arm lowering as he stumbled back against the wall. I noticed he didn't drop his gun, however.

Black lines latticed over his neck, and blood mottled his clothes like patchwork. The idiot hadn't even been wearing armour. _Kylah almost killed him, _I realized as he continued to stare dumbly at me. _He was the one trapped against the wall._

"What- are you with them?" he whispered, his eyes roving over me. "No... you can't be... can you?"

I thought I'd had enough surprises already, but apparently not. "Oh, some thanks I get for saving your life," I snapped, crouching down and pilfering the lightsaber that lay close to the recently departed master. I'd figure out why she wanted me to take it later. "You've called me some nasty names before, Onasi, but one of those core-slime Dark Jedi? Gee, thanks."

His gaze was dubious, almost hesitant, as he looked me over again. As the suspicion mounted in his eyes, I had to bite back the scowl determined to etch into my face. At least this was a healthy sort of anger, frustrated irritation at his familiar paranoia – nothing like the storm of fury that drowned me in its wake. That sometimes seemed impossible to control.

He opened his mouth to speak, closed it, sighed, and then tried again. "I suppose there's no point in asking why you're dressed like a Sith then. Why are you here, Jen?"

How could I answer that? I'd never really explained anything to Carth – Gods, I didn't even know what was going on with myself most of the time. _And Revan... _now that was something I'd never let slip, no matter what. In the end, I answered simply, "I decided it was time to stop running."

He sighed, weariness and exasperation chasing through his features as he slumped back against the wall, eyes closed. The gun dropped from his lifeless fingers. "I really can't believe you, Jen. You blow up our ship – stars, you almost kill us! Disappear off the planet, and then a day later your back!" His voice rose; despite myself, I flinched. At the time, the sabotage on the Ebon Hawk had been sensible, logical – but now, knowing who was in my head- "Barging into the middle of this invasion, and claiming to save my life?" His eyes snapped open, dark and flashing. "Wait- Kylah- where is that bitch?"

"She ran off," I answered curtly.

"She-" He sighed again. "I guess you did save my life, then. I thought that was my end." A bark of laughter issued from him; a desperate, humourless sound. "But you arrived in the nick of time, like usual."

_Not for Karon. _My eyes slid back to the prone Zabrak, resting on the crumple of beige and dark red.

"Karon?" Carth gasped, following my gaze. "Is- is she dead?"

I nodded slowly. "I felt her die," I murmured through cold lips. "She has... joined the Force, as they say."

Carth's attention had fixed on me once more, mistrustful and cagey. "We need to move from here. Kylah's still out there, along with however many Dark Jedi are still alive. Did you- did you encounter any?"

I nodded briskly, wincing as I rolled my shoulder back. "The Selkath got one of the foyer guards, I killed the other. Some Twi'lek apprentice killed a third." I pushed my senses out; a deliberate, tiring effort now that the battle adrenaline had departed me. The Force felt heavy, almost unnatural in my grasp, and I couldn't feel anything approximating a Force user. "Kylah's done a runner, flyboy. I can't sense any Dark Jedi in the building anymore."

Carth's eyes closed as he breathed in deeply, leaning against the wall. "I hope you're right. I doubt I can survive another encounter anyway."

I attempted a weak smile. "Come on, Onasi, you're not that badly beaten up. Nothing a few whiskeys won't cure, at any rate."

His eyes snapped open as he scowled at me. "Your solution for everything, isn't it, Jen? A few drinks- or, failing that, berserk and go on a rampage."

I flinched inwardly at his bitter tone, but couldn't really blame him - I supposed I deserved that. But there was something more urgent than appeasing Carth, no matter how right he was to be angry at me. "Where's Bastila?" I queried in a low tone.

The scowl dropped as his expression turned serious once more. "Not here, that's all I know. Wann told me she was on a mission somewhere, but wouldn't divulge more. At least she's been safely out of this massacre, though."

Shockwaves of dread slid through me; I could feel the beads of sweat popping into existence on my forehead. _If she's not here, then where is she? What's happened to her? _It wasn't inconceivable that the Sith had led a two-pronged attack. In fact, I couldn't help but think it probable, considering the intangibility of the bond. If I hadn't known about our mind link previously, I wouldn't even have noticed the whisper of her soul in my mind.

"I need to find her," I mumbled. "Who's Wann?"

"You actually _want_ to find Bastila now?" Carth muttered something inaudible under his breath. "Roland Wann's the Commander here. I'll take you to him – we should find out who's still alive." He locked eyes with me again, trailing over my clothes. "Though get rid of that blasted cloak, would you?"

xXx

The Republic Commander was an older, chubby man; dark skinned and face etched with worry lines. Black shadows lurked under his eyes, and I had the feeling he'd been less than prepared for today's attack. None too surprising, really, considering the enforced neutrality of this cursed place.

"Carth, thank the stars you're alive," Roland wheezed as we stepped into the command room. A couple of soldiers had waved us in after opening the door, but blasters had stayed ready in their grip. Two of them were looking at me warily. _Well, I guess this torn, bloodied armour doesn't exactly make a great first impression, but it's gotta be better than a black cloak. _"What happened out there? The last time I spotted a Dark Jedi was ten minutes ago, jumping into that submersible. I didn't dare believe it – are they all dead?"

"Kylah," I muttered angrily. _So she did escape. _Roland's gaze was drawn to me, immediately suspicious. _Must be a common trait of all Republic soldiers. Maybe they learn mistrust at cadet school._

Carth nodded at the Commander. "Nine deaths accounted for. The one you spotted must have been that traitor, Kylah, escaping."

"They're – they're all dead?" a younger man squeaked from further in the room. He looked like a tech; about ten casually clothed workers were huddled against the far wall. "It's over?"

A ragged cheer arose among the small crowd, all of whom appeared exhausted and petrified. One sank to his knees in relief, covering his face with shaky hands. Roland's shoulders dropped as the tension slowly dissipated from his stance. He looked once more at me. "Who's this?"

Carth glanced at me also, dark eyes imploring for my silence. "Jen. She's one of Bastila's crew," he said finally.

Roland frowned. "Hang on – wasn't that the name of the survivor who fled the Ebon Hawk?"

I shrugged uneasily. Carth shot me a disappointed frown, and I dropped my gaze. _Well, I guess it could have been worse. They must not have told Roland the whole truth, otherwise he'd be labelling me a fugitive at the least. _Roland's gaze moved to the lightsabers hooked on my belt, and a dark scowl wrapped itself on his weathered face. "Another Jedi?" he groused.

Irritation crested over my disquiet, and I shot him a filthy look. "Oh, I'm sorry," I snapped sarcastically, "maybe I should have left you lot to fight the Sith alone!"

Carth sighed noisily as the Commander's fierce look of annoyance intensified. "This attack happened because of you Jedi!" Roland snarled back. "They invaded to get at Bastila or, or Karon! If you Jedi hadn't been here, all my men would still be alive!"

Fierce indignation swept through me as I opened my mouth to retort, but the Commander beat me to it with a hurried, "Karon – where is she? Did you find her, captain?"

"She, uh," Carth trailed off, shaking his head. "She didn't make it."

My gut clenched at the words. I hadn't wanted to meet Karon, inwardly dreading any confrontation with a Jedi Master. But now I'd more or less gotten my wish, I bitterly regretted it. _She knew the answers. Sithspit, she's the one who shoved that bitch in my head! _And yet, after witnessing the Zabrak's death, I couldn't help but feel remorse as well as anger. _It wasn't my fault! _ _I had nothing to do with the Sith attacking here! _But I couldn't stem the tide of recriminations – if I hadn't run from Manaan, what would have happened? Would Karon still be alive? Would Bastila be out of danger?

"Bastila," I gasped suddenly. "Where is she?"

A loud explosion deafened any scathing response the Commander would have made, and rocked the walls around me. I stumbled backwards, fumbling instinctively for a weapon as someone screamed in fright. It took a second before I registered that the blast – whatever it was – had occurred some rooms away.

Carth had whipped out his blaster, facing one of the exits intently. The techs were whimpering against the back wall.

"Dammit, captain! I thought you said those sithspawn were all dead!" Roland cursed, having toppled against a row of consoles.

_They **are** all dead! _All, except that traitor Kylah – but she had fled. My muscles clenched in readiness, a painful tension against the exhaustion that lingered in my limbs. The Force skittered away from my clumsy grasp, and I knew a moment of real terror. If this was a second wave of Force users, then I sincerely doubted my chances. My shoulder throbbed from the Genoharadan attack on Rii'shn, and even now, a hollow ache thrummed in my once-broken arm. In short, I was a wreck.

"Uh, Commander?" a soldier interrupted, eyes fixed on a screen next to Wann. "There's Selkath in the halls."

"Selkath?" Roland queried flatly as he turned to look. Realization struck me – the foyer doors had been locked down after my entrance. If the Selkath were determined to enter and supposedly neutralize the Sith threat, then they'd probably detonated their way in.

Carth's shoulders sagged in relief, even as he holstered his blaster. I stared down at my clenched fingers as the alarm abated. With an absent sort of curiosity I realized the lightsaber I was gripping was Karon's. _Huh. I bet it's not red._

"Talk about bloody timing," Roland muttered, his gaze roving over the consoles. From my vantage point, I could spot several camera outputs displayed on the screens he was leaning over. More than half showed naught but static. "They certainly took long enough."

Slurring shouts emanated through the doors, and I recognized the Selkath accent with something approaching dread. I'd run from them earlier, but hopefully without the concealing black cloak, they wouldn't recognize me. Neither Roland nor Carth had so far questioned exactly how I'd ventured inside, and I hoped it'd stay that way. A gut instinct warned me that the Selkath were notoriously picky over their tyrannical laws; they wouldn't hesitate to slam me for resisting arrest at the least.

"This is the Ahto City Civil Authority!" a thick voice yelled from outside the room. "Open the door and throw down your weapons immediately!"

"Oh, this is going to be fun," Carth muttered, as I tucked my lightsaber away hurriedly. I heard Roland growl even as the durasteel doors opened to admit a dozen heavily armoured Selkath guards. _Oh, frelling fantastic,_ I thought sourly as the soldiers swarmed into the room and surrounded us. _I need a sodding drink._

xXx

The chrome bench was cold underneath me as I stared vacantly into a glass of amber liquid. This room was the closest thing the Embassy had to a bar; a sparse cafeteria nestled within the barracks, ostensibly for the Republic soldiers. Considering the opulence of this place, I doubted if alcohol was meant to be served on the premises, but the shifty-eyed soldier who'd introduced himself as Laconi seemed more than happy to supply me with stronger substances than mere ale.

Considering the Embassy was currently locked-down by the Selkath while they interrogated Roland Wann, and perused what camera feeds weren't destroyed, I had little better place to reside.

_I've gotta get out of here._ My body was fiercely demanding rest, even as impatience warred within. Carth had found out earlier just where Bastila had disappeared to – a secret mission to the bottom of the damned ocean, to rescue a bunch of scientists. He'd known little else, other than that Juhani and Canderous had both accompanied her. I was relieved that neither had been caught in the bloodbath here, though I felt surprise at hearing Canderous had voluntarily followed Bastila.

The distance between Bastila and I couldn't explain the obscurity of the bond. I could swear that she was critically injured or ill, and probably unconscious. I hesitated to mention any of this to Carth, however. Last time I'd talked of our bond, he'd been derisively disbelieving. I'd no idea what Bastila had said of our attachment during my absence, and frankly, I didn't want to push my luck as far as Carth was concerned.

_I need to find Bastila. Stang, how long are the Selkath gonna keep us here? _It'd been hours since they'd swarmed into Roland's command room, quickly taking control over the whole Embassy. The red-faced Commander had been pretty unhappy about that, even more so when he'd heard the explosion had been a permacrete detonator that had torn through most of the entrance foyer to grant the Selkath access. The Selkath themselves had assumed command and swiftly blockaded the facility, and while I'd disliked obeying the pedantic bastards, I couldn't stem the amusement that swelled over surveying the blustering Commander's indignation.

But my thoughts turned once more, inevitably, to my bond sister. The idea of hunting down a submersible and traipsing after her had already occurred to me, although slipping out from underneath the Selkath's lockdown wouldn't be easy. _I could always ask HK. _With a jolt, I realized I had no idea where that bloodthirsty droid had disappeared to. _Kath crap, _I thought with alarm. _If he decides to barge in here, the Selkath will likely fire on him. _HK had occasionally shown subtlety, but it almost seemed to go against his programming.

"Jen," a low voice sparked through my ruminations. I glanced up to see Carth hovering nearby – he'd been called away a few hours ago by Roland Wann. Black shadows smudged the skin under his eyes, and he was still wearing ripped, bloodied clothes. _He looks like how I feel. _His eyes flicked disparagingly over the stale beer cradled in my palms.

"They finally let you out?" I smirked as he took a step closer. He rolled his eyes at me, and eased himself onto the long bench.

"Anyone would think that we attacked the Sith, rather than the other way around," he muttered. His gaze roved over the soldier-cum-bartender, and an annoyed scowl appeared on his lined face. I wondered absently what he had against Laconi. The twitchy soldier seemed relatively harmless to me.

"The Selkath are pretty pedantic over their non-violence laws," I commented, and then immediately wished I hadn't as Carth turned to glare fiercely at me.

"Yes," he ground out. "So we found out, after you crashed the ship and the Sith tried to tow us." Angry disappointment coloured his tone, and I looked away, staring deeply into the ale I was nursing. I could feel something akin to shame burning in my cheeks.

"Look," he sighed heavily next to me. "I-I can't forget what you did. You're a loose cannon, Jen, and you damn near killed us. But believe it or not, I didn't come here to argue."

I could feel my jaw clenching, as the uncomfortable sensation of bitter anger mingled with contrition. On one hand, he was right, but then again I _had_ just saved his sorry arse. I wondered if he even remembered that.

"So why did you come here?" I bit out, after a heavy pause.

"We've heard from the others."

My head snapped up, startled, as I turned to face him once more. "Where are they? What's going on?"

"It's a big mess," Carth muttered, shaking his head. "The Selkath have intercepted a delayed distress signal from the Republic Station. From what Roland told me, the message was brief. A couple of scientists and three Republic soldiers are alive down there – no names, however. They've requested immediate aid and life-support. One of the survivors is gravely wounded."

_Bastila. _A shred of hope wound through me. If the Selkath were on their way, then it wouldn't be too long until I could force some answers out of her. She had to tell me the truth, now that I knew just what evil lurked so insidiously inside my own cursed head.

Carth slumped back, sighing. "Apparently, the Selkath have also picked up on some sort of explosion down there. I don't know what's been going on, but it's turned into a colossal predicament for the Republic."

I frowned at him in query. His mouth twisted as he went on to elaborate. "The Republic base is a secret kolto mining facility. I'm sure I don't have to spell out the ramifications of that becoming public."

I could feel my eyes widen. "A secret kolto base?" I gasped. "Kath crap, what did the Republic think they were doing? The Selkath won't bloody stand for that, they're so fiercely proud of their blasted neutrality and their independent kolto trade that they'll stop selling _any_ to the Republic after this! Stang, what did the Republic _think_ would happen?"

Carth was eyeing me over appraisingly. "You seem to have a good idea of Manaan politics," he murmured in a low tone. I could feel my stomach lurch, and ran through quickly what I'd just said. I shrugged. It seemed like common sense to me. "Regardless," he continued. "Some members of the Selkath government knew about this base previously. Stars, they more or less sanctioned it and kept it hidden from the rest of the bureaucrats."

I snorted, shaking my head as I picked up the glass of beer and took a swig. Sounded like the Selkath government was about to embroil itself in an ugly civil war. With the Republic right in the middle of it.

"You know, in a way it's a good thing for the Republic that the Sith attacked here when they did," I murmured. A brief surge of outrage flitted over Carth's face before shrewd introspection took its place.

"You mean, they might close down both Embassies rather than just ours?" he muttered.

I tilted my head. "Well, the Republic's really screwed themselves over with this revelation, but coming at the same time as an unprovoked attack on them by the Sith Empire..." I trailed off, shrugging. "Probably will make them look a little better, yeah."

We lapsed into silence after that, each lost in our own thoughts. I'd emptied my glass, and was considering another as thoughts of Bastila and Revan returned to plague me. I knew little of the former Sith Lord, other than that she had once been a Jedi, and had led the Republic to victory in the Mandalorian Wars before turning. _But then again, _I thought sourly, _it's not like I know a drukload about myself, either. My homeworld was Talshion, and I lived on the streets before becoming a Jedi. _From the brief shards of memory that had drifted to my consciousness, I knew that I'd also been in the Mandalorian Wars. _Did I follow Revan and Malak? _I felt a slight tremor trickle through me. _No. I'd never follow that Sith bitch. I wouldn't. _Bastila had once told me I'd fallen to the Dark Side. I'd been more inclined to believe it back then, when I hadn't been sure which personality was really me. _No. She was saying that to justify Revan's thoughts in my head. I don't know how I fit in – or how Jen Sahara does – but there's no way I went Dark Side. No way at all._

Carth shifted uncomfortably near me, his eyes sliding to glance at me surreptitiously. I had the distinct feeling he wanted to broach a topic, but wasn't sure how to start. I tried unsuccessfully to hold back a smirk.

"Yes?" I raised my eyebrows. "You want to say something?"

"I, uh, yeah," he stuttered. "Uh, am I that obvious?"

I snorted. "If you were any more obvious, your eyes would fall out of your head."

Said eyes narrowed. "I'm not that bad, am I? No, look, don't answer that," he sighed. "Seriously, I wanted to ask you something. You told me once that you didn't really remember your past," he said, his expression intent and fixed on me.

"Did I?" I looked away, shoulders tensing. I wanted to make peace with Carth, but this really wasn't the sort of conversation I was interested in.

"Yes. On Tatooine, before Calo Nord attacked us." His voice was short, almost suspicious, and the sheer familiarity of that ripped a laugh from me.

"Is that a crime these days?" I smirked, looking back at him.

He scowled. "No- look, I'm serious here!"

"Okay, okay, keep your flight jacket on." I paused. "Where is that hideous thing anyway?"

"Mission flogged it off back- stop trying to change the subject!"

I fiddled with the flask of ale, eyes downcast as I struggled to contain myself. "Alright, what do you want to know?"

"What do you remember from Deralia?"

My eyes flew to his in surprise, but Carth's countenance gave nothing away. I stayed silent for a full minute, searching his expression. _Why does he want to know that? What interest would Jen's past have for him? _"I've told you about my background before, Onasi. I grew up in a quiet settlement. When I was old enough, I studied at the Academia." I shrugged uncomfortably. "Nothing exciting about my past, I'm afraid." _Well, nothing about Jen's._

His gaze held mine. "Were you there when Darth Revan's forces invaded two years ago?"

I froze; ice slid down my spine. "_What?_" I hissed. _Deralia was attacked? By- by Revan?_ Disbelief curled through my veins, I didn't want to think about the implications of that. I was shaking my head wildly without realizing. "No, no, I don't want to talk about that."

Something akin to sympathy lurked in his face; I was damned if I'd allow him to pity me.

"Jen-"

"No! I wasn't there, alright?" I demanded angrily. _Was I, though? Was Jen on Deralia when Revan invaded? Is that how she's caught up in all of this? _ With mounting horror, flashes of recollection caught up to me. Back on Rii'shn– facing off the Genoharadan– Revan had cursed the traitorous Sith and Deralian troops alike-

_No! Bastila faced Revan, on Revan's flagship! That wasn't on Deralia! _

"I'm sorry," Carth said abruptly. "Look, I shouldn't have brought it up. Let's- let's talk about something else, okay?"

My jaw was clenched tight, and I could feel my hands shaking. "This conversation is over," I muttered, standing up. _Did Jen meet Revan? _Horror soared within; I didn't want imagine an encounter between the timid bunny-saving introvert and the insane Sith bitch. Not when they were both resident inside my own head.

I didn't hear Carth calling after me as I walked blindly out of the makeshift bar; my thoughts were too chaotically wild to listen to him. As the days had passed, I learnt flashes more about Revan, and about Jen, but my own history remained a shrouded conundrum, taunting me with what I didn't know.

_If Revan and Jen met on Deralia, _I thought numbly, _then what about me? Dammit, why are they in my head? How do I fit into this? _If the Republic didn't get Bastila back here soon, I swore I'd go find her myself. _This has dragged on long enough. I need to get my head straight, and she's going to give me some long overdue answers._

This time, half-lies and part-truths wouldn't appease me.

* * *

xXx

* * *

_**Author's Note: **If you are out there reading this, please take the time to drop me a quick review. It'd make my day :-)_

_**Replies to reviews:  
Dark Lord Daishi – **Here's Rev, hope you enjoy!  
**Mark Solo – **Glad you like them both. We'll see about their survival, though – Malak would hardly approve of their choice of company.  
**Lord Demandred – **cheers :-)  
**Estarc** – Thanks for the review, I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far. RE: the Selkath god – well, I figured it had to be something mental/Force-related to have that effect on the Selkath researchers. Or possibly sonic, I guess. But the former was much more fun to write :-)  
**Nikeon** – well, here's finally a chapter without a cliffhanger! And yeah, who could forget Bastila :-)  
**Curtis** – Oddly enough, that's inspired me to do a backup :-P_


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